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Topic:
Healer Record of Qui-Gon Jinn -- ~~~ Updated 9/8~~~ Seriously, new post!
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Layren
Registered:
Oct '03
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Date Posted:
7/22/05 8:09am
Subject:
Healer Record of Qui-Gon Jinn -- ~~~ Updated 9/8~~~ Seriously, new post!
- Date Edited:
9/8/06 7:53pm (11 edits total)
Edited By:
Layren
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Title: A Healer's Record of Qui-Gon Jinn
Author(s): Layren and Neon Star
Category: Humor
Rating: G
Author's Note: We're back in action! For those of you who remember the original Healer record written with Charmisjess, due to lack of time and interest she has given the bunny back to the original author. Neon Star will be collaborating in her place, since she was the original author of the bunny  We are huge feedback junkies! Feed us!
Begin Healer Han'yaie's Record of Jedi Qui-Gon Jinn
Full Name: Qui-Gon Edith Jinn
Species: Human
Gender: Male
Homeworld: Classified
Last Recorded Age: 60
Height: 6'4"
Weight: 215
Eye color: Blue
Hair color : Brown with gray streaks
Age When Brought to the Temple: 9 standard months
Reason for File: Purging system records of deceased patients.
Start Record Conditions of subject
Age subject came to Temple. Arrived safe and sound and in one piece. The last time he'd ever arrive at my office in one piece.
Age One: Tripped over Master Yoda and broke his arm. The venerable Master has taken an instant dislike to this young one.
Age 2: Bitten by poisonous plant.
Age 2: Plant bite getting worse.
Age 2: Near death. Gave him a shot to clear it up.
Age 2: Recovering. Could not give second shot as was kicked several times. Broken knee. Have new nickname for him: Qui-Pain Jinn.
Age 2: Fell out of a tree in the gardens and broke his leg. How in the Force did a two-year-old climb that high?
Age 3: Fell on Master Yan Dooku. Minor scrapes and bruises.
Age 3: Fell downstairs thanks to Master Yoda's gimmer stick. I've been telling him it's a health hazard for years.
Age 3: Fell on top of Master Rhy'ul of the Jedi Council. Slight bump on the head where he should've had a concussion. Apparently this child is thicker headed than the rest in my experience.
Age 4: Stomach flu. Treated easily.
Age 4: Fell downstairs again, thanks to Yoda. I think the Master makes it a habit to trip the boy once a year. Broken left leg.
Age 5: Shots. Tied him down to give them. Was bitten three times but eventually managed.
Age 5: Came in demanding to know what a Sith was. I told him to ask Yoda. Yoda waved his gimmer stick at the two of us and said he would understand when he was older.
Age 5: Bitten by stray animal he tried to bring home. Rash developing.
Age 5: Rash clearing up.
Age 5: Kidnapped while still sick. Brought back a new deadly disease and a stray cat with him.
Age 5: Shots to get the disease out of his system. Two of the other healers have broken legs from Qui- Pain Jinn. Just how do they teach five-year-olds to kick that hard?
Age 5: Disease finally gone but tripped down the stairs over Master Yoda again his first day out of the Healers. Demanded he was fine while he hopped on one leg.
Age 5: Fell in the river and near drowned. Initiate Kyran Josel rescued him and the crèche Master dragged him to see me.
Age 6: Treated for nightmares about near drowning. Give him medication and send him back to bed.
Age 6: Poisoned by something in the gardens. Easily treated.
Age 6: Master Yoda's yearly ritual of tripping the boy. Mild concussion.
(Record continuation on next page.)
Edited -- for timeline continuity purposes.
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lazykbys_left
Registered:
Feb '05
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Date Posted:
7/22/05 8:18am
Subject:
RE: Healer Record of Qui-Gon Jinn [loved it! looking forward to more!]
- Date Edited:
8/11/05 7:30am (1 edits total)
Edited By:
lazykbys_left
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Age 6: Master Yoda's yearly ritual of tripping the boy. Mild concussion.
 Picking on someone his own size, was he?
Looking forward to more!
- lazy
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"You're like some kind of link machine." - rhonderoo It didn't stop being magic just because you found out how it was done. DARK SIDE FHTAGN lazykbys fanfic index (click and scroll dowwwn): http://boards.theforce.net/m/b1/17609715/r17736763
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VaderLVR64
Title: Fan Fic Manager in Combat Boots
Registered:
Feb '04
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Date Posted:
7/22/05 11:20am
Subject:
RE: Healer Record of Qui-Gon Jinn -- (reworked!) Collaboration with Neon Star
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I SO needed a good laugh today!
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If you have to choose between tears and laughter, remember that laughter burns more calories.
Proud New Army Mom - off to bootcamp!
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DarthIshtar
Title: Former CR
Star Wars Trivia Hostess
Registered:
Mar '01
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Date Posted:
7/22/05 11:39am
Subject:
RE: Healer Record of Qui-Gon Jinn -- (reworked!) Collaboration with Neon Star
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Yay, reworked! Welcome back!
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"You are some self-important encyclopedia with too much time on his hands. I will see to it personally that you are used for spare parts every time my speeder needs an overhaul. You and that overpriced forklift out there." ~Dr. Bel Maden
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Aya-Na_Bashu
Registered:
Jul '05
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Date Posted:
7/22/05 12:43pm
Subject:
RE: Healer Record of Qui-Gon Jinn -- (reworked!) Collaboration with Neon Star
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I now know where Obi-Wan gets it from.
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Master to aden
Proud member of ISPLN
Step away from Qui-Gon and no one will get hurt!
My fics are in my bio.
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Commander-DWH
Registered:
Nov '03
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Date Posted:
7/22/05 1:32pm
Subject:
RE: Healer Record of Qui-Gon Jinn -- (reworked!) Collaboration with Neon Star
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Age 5: Kidnapped while still sick. Brought back a new deadly disease and a stray cat with him.
Can't forget the stray cat, eh? Love it.
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lost_jedii
Registered:
May '05
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Date Posted:
7/22/05 3:34pm
Subject:
RE: Healer Record of Qui-Gon Jinn -- (reworked!) Collaboration with Neon Star
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Hahahahahaha This is great
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Proud padawan of BrentusofGath  "An important lesson for Padawans," Adi said, overhearing them. Obi-Wan threw a glance at Qui-Gon. "And for stubborn Jedi Masters." "I have no idea who you mean," Qui-Gon said, his eyes twinkling.
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Kynstar
Registered:
Mar '04
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Date Posted:
7/22/05 5:01pm
Subject:
RE: Healer Record of Qui-Gon Jinn -- (reworked!) Collaboration with Neon Star
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See what did I tell ya? His love for all lifeforms plant and animal alike would get the best of him. 
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Paddy sis to t_s & SarkaVrae/Master to hyperspace_police
Member of Rebel Legion and Jedi Assembly (Kynstar Lans)
Long live fanfiction...for in these tales do our heroes still exist.
See stories/viggies in bio
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Princess_Arulmozhi
Registered:
Nov '04
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Date Posted:
7/22/05 8:09pm
Subject:
RE: Healer Record of Qui-Gon Jinn -- (reworked!) Collaboration with Neon Star
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LOL. Qui Pain Jinn, indeed. The times he falls off/gets beaten up/ends up with diseases...
Lovely work, you two! 
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Perceptions (Xanatos/Obi/Qui/Anakin) AU:http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/25276178/p1/?7 - *vignette* Stones (Li'l Obi/Qui) - http://boards.theforce.net/before_the_saga/b10475/23371821/p1/ Best Author, WFFA (BtS) 05/06 Lore-Master to 7
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VadersMistress
Registered:
Apr '04
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Date Posted:
7/22/05 9:36pm
Subject:
RE: Healer Record of Qui-Gon Jinn -- (reworked!) Collaboration with Neon Star
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I needed that! Thanks for the laughs!
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And what it all comes down to is that I haven't got it figured out just yet.
Would I rather be feared or loved? Um... Easy, both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me.
Persia pwns your face.
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dianethx
Registered:
Mar '02
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Date Posted:
7/23/05 6:50am
Subject:
RE: Healer Record of Qui-Gon Jinn -- (reworked!) Collaboration with Neon Star
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Master Yoda is a secret Sith. We can tell by the records!!!! Good job.
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-Darksaber-
Registered:
Mar '05
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Date Posted:
7/23/05 10:52am
Subject:
RE: Healer Record of Qui-Gon Jinn -- (reworked!) Collaboration with Neon Star
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Brilliant! Oh, I'm coming over all nostalgic, and I think I shall cry. Oh well.
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I literally do not know who I am. It's all untested. Am I funny? Am I sarcastic? Sexy? Right old misery? Life and soul? Right-handed? Left-handed? A gambler? A fighter? A coward? A traitor? A nervous wreck? Judging by the evidence, I've certainly got
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Shadowolf
Registered:
May '05
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Date Posted:
7/23/05 8:44pm
Subject:
RE: Healer Record of Qui-Gon Jinn -- (reworked!) Collaboration with Neon Star
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Oh my, Yoda really did have it in for young Qui-Pain...er Qui-Gon didn't he? No wonder those two never seemed to get along!
Cute, Y'all, looking forward to more!
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Love is more than a candle. Love can ignite the stars. - Matthew Stover Happy to be Layren's Padawan! From My Point of View http://boards.theforce.net/message.asp?topic=21027412 updated 12/23 - finally! Happy Holidays one and all!
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corellian-jedi
Registered:
Jun '05
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Date Posted:
7/23/05 8:55pm
Subject:
RE: Healer Record of Qui-Gon Jinn -- (reworked!) Collaboration with Neon Star
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Absolutely hilarious! And jeez, I knew Yoda used that gimmer stick for more sinister activities!
For walking? As if - bah humbug!
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In hatred as in love, we grow like the thing we brood upon. What we loathe, we graft into our very soul. 
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Black_Scout
Registered:
Nov '03
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Date Posted:
7/24/05 8:55am
Subject:
RE: Healer Record of Qui-Gon Jinn -- (reworked!) Collaboration with Neon Star
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Yey, I love these sorts of things they always make me laugh. great start.
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First Barwoman of the FFUK; 'Admiral Ozzel's Snozzled Hovel' 'There's no such thing as one Button' - the Button family motto Member of the 'Suzy and Jenny sisters alliance' My sister exploded Best website in the World - http://kevan.org/brain.cgi?Suzy%20
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kateydidnt
Registered:
Nov '04
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Date Posted:
7/27/05 9:41pm
Subject:
RE: Healer Record of Qui-Gon Jinn -- (reworked!) Collaboration with Neon Star
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Yeah! glad you're back!
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R2D2: The Swiss-Army Knife of Droids The Outer Rim: Minor Character Index http://boards.theforce.net/message.asp?topic=21597215
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