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Author	Topic: A Gift of Gimer (OC Challenge Response, One-Post)
Lord_Zeron Registered: Mar '05	Date Posted: 6/17/05 5:15pm Subject: A Gift of Gimer (OC Challenge Response, One-Post)
	Title: A Gift of Gimer Author(s): Lord_Zeron Timeframe: During Revenge of the Sith Characters: OC Genre: Not really sure... Keywords: None Summary: The story of how a half-crazy, old, alien janitor managed to help a Jedi Master. Notes: This is a response to the OC Challenge, and it does contain RotS spoilers. This is a style that I've never done before, and I'll probably never do again. The main character, who tells most of the story from a first person point-of-view, has a very strange accent, and tends to go off on wild tangents. I'm sure that readers will either like his narration and find it comical and unique, or dislike it and find it childish and annoying. I tried to make it semi-humorous, so I hope everyone who reads enjoys it. Any likes/dislikes are welcome, and I'd love to see people's reactions to the way it's written, whether good or bad (If it's bad, please tell me so I know not to do it again, although I probably won't anyway). Also, the ending is sort of rushed, because I had to make today's deadline, sorry about that. A Gift of Gimer “Sit,” the first interrogator ordered. “Lemme go!” the aging alien protested, as he slapped the strong arm that was holding onto his own, to no apparent effect. The owner of the arm, the interrogator, forced the old alien down into a hard metal chair. The alien tried to sit upright, but his aging back prevented him from success. Nevertheless, he grabbed onto the metal arms of the chair, and put an expression on his face that suggested he was under severe insult. The second interrogator closed the door to the small room, as his comrade took a seat in another metal chair, on the other side of the small table the alien was seated in front of. With the door to the rest of the station closed, the only light came from an extremely small light in the center of the ceiling. “Now,” the first interrogator, the one in the chair, said, as he laced his fingers on the small table. “I want you to tell me what you were doing in the Senator Organa’s private docking bay.” “I ain’t tellin’ you nothin’.” The alien crossed his four thin arms against his small thorax. The interrogator didn’t seem to be surprised, he snapped his fingers and the only source of light switched off. “What the stars do ya think you’re doin’? I ain’t not ‘fraid of no dark. Why, my ancestors lived under da groun’ for tousans of years, and dey wern scarred of notin’. No sirey, jus’ ‘cause you turn off da lights don’t make you nothin’ special or nothin’. If- ” But the alien was interrupted when a circular, extremely bright light came to life not a quarter meter away from his face. He raised his primary arms to shield his eyes, as his secondary reached out blindly trying to push the light away. The interrogator, who was holding the light source, moved it out of range before his subject could grab it. “What the stars! You gonna gimme a heart attack or sometin’, and I ain’t not gonna like that too much. I call my lawyer on you, and den you is gonna be payin’ for dis. I got rights, ya know.” By now he had given up trying to grab at the light, and although his primary hands were still shielding his sanative eyes, his secondaries were now waving long, thin finger scoldingly at the man across the table. “Answer my questions, and then you’re free to go. Provided you didn’t do anything illegal of course. Agreed?” “I ain’t not agreein’ to nothin’. If I don’ wanna tell you nothin’ den I don’ gotta. So I ain’t tellin’ a cave spida like you nothin’ at all. I don’ care what ya do ta me, ‘cause I ain’t talkin’. Now take dat an stuff it up your scrawny liddle excuse for a-” “Rill, give him the shot.” “Shoot me?” Upon hearing this, the old alien made to raise from his chair, but the second interrogator grabbed him by the shoulders semi-gently and pushed him back down. “Now, I know dat dat ain’ allowed, I don’ care who ya are.” A moment later, the alien felt a sharp stab to one of his arms, and realized that he was being given a shot, not being shot. “I still not... gonna... tell you nothin’,” he managed to say before collapsing back into the chair, a woosy look on his insect-like face. “Now,” the interrogator said. “I want you to start from the very beginning. Tell me who you are, what it is you do, and why you were found in the vicinity of a Senator’s transport without clearance. And I want the truth.” “Da truth... yessir. Let see, now. Well, I guess it all started a lon’ lon’ time ‘go, a couple a decades short of a centry ta be ‘xact. I’s born ta a brood of...” he took a moment to think, raising a finger to his chin. “Well, I forget how much, but twas a lot fer sure. Anywayd, when-” “Not that beginning,” the interrogator interrupted. “Just get on with it.” The alien sat up as if once again insulted. “Well, alrighty then. Ya see, my name’s...” * * * Well, alrighty then. Ya see, my name’s Arhemious Growl, or Army for short. ‘Cause of me four arms, ya know? I got four of ‘em and most people only got ‘bout two, and dey seem to be tinkin’ dat it’s funny or sometin’. It ain’ not really dat funny, not ta me at leas’, but dey seem to tink so. But da reason I got four arms is ‘cause I’m an X’Ting from Ord Cetserus. Ord Censtut. Ord Cestust. Aw, dangnabit, I never could pernounce it dat good. But I from dere. When I was youn’, I decide’ ta go ‘bout traveling, ‘cause of some sort of argment wit somebody or sometin’. But dat don’ matta. I ‘cided to come ta Corscant, ‘cause I been hearin’ dat it’s really pretty in da night. And I like da night, dats why ur little trick wit da ligh’ didn’ work. But when I got here, I couldn’ get no job, ‘cause I ain’t got no skills. I mean I can run fasta dan a zeesta on a hot day, an I can climb betta dan any human eva could. But dose skills ain’t mean notin’ to dese here city folk, so I had to get a job as a jantor at da Senate building’. After a while, seventy decades er so, I came ta be the head custodial offcer. Dat means I’m importan’ you see. People be respectin’ me den. Well, not all of da people, but mos’ of dem at leas’. Well, not really mos’ of dem either, but at leas’ more den when I was a normal jantor. So anywayd, earlier taday, I was mindin’ my own business. My assistan’ Bronk and I was cleanin’ some of da hallways in da lower levels of da buildin’, an some cleanin’ droids were helpin’ us. I was workin’ on a certain hallway all by meself, you understan’. Da odders were all workin’ somewheres else, and I was all alone. Just by meself, ya see. So I was washin’ da floor, jus’ doin my job, when Mas Amedda, da speaker of da Senate started comin’ towars me. Ya see, dat hallway was near the Chancller’s private office, so I suppose dats where Amedda was comin’ from. You know who he is, righ’? Big blue guy, four horns, scarey lookin’ sorta thing. Not ‘xactly sure what species he is, I ain’t seen nothin’ like ‘im before, but dat’s not da point. Now firs’ I bedder explain my... relationship wit the Speaker a da Senate. He not really a nice guy or nothin’ and he never cared too much for lil’ ol’ Army. Dats me, ‘member? Sometimes I like to talk in da tird person, ‘cause it’s fun, ya know? Sometimes change can be a good ting, but da Senate sure seems not ta tink that way. Oh, yeah, da Senate. Gettin’ back to da Mas Ammeda, he was comin’ towars me all angry like. At leas’, I tink he was angry. Sometime it’s hard to tell, ‘cause he sort of angry lookin’ all of da time. But today he was lookin’ even extra angrier dan he usually is. I knew not ta get in his way, ‘cause I smart like dat, ya know? Army’s good like dat. Dere I go usin’ da tird person again. I don’ know why I do it, it just sorta come natural like, you know? So I stood to da side of da hallway, pressin’ my back up agains’ da wall. An bein’ thin does help out a lot, a course. Dats one of ta main reasons I like ta keep so thin. Ya didn’ tink it was ‘cause I don’ take care of myself, di’ ya? ‘Cause I used to be stronger than a reek on a hot day. I don’ really know what a reek is, bu’ I heard some people usein’ it ta describe someone strong. Maybe it’s some kind a anmal or sometin’. Ah, don’ matta. Back ta Mas Ammeda walkin’ pas’ me. I was bein’ a good lil’ chief jantor, not doin’ anyting wrong, an da Speaker of da Senate walk right pas’ me at firs’. I was happy, ‘cause I wouldn’ want to have to talk ta him on a good day, and taday he was really angry. Even angrier dan usual. Oh wait, I told ya dat already. Sorry, I’m at an ol’ age now so I forget dese things sometimes. But jus’ when I was gettin’ sort a happy dat he had gone pas’ me, he stop in his tracks, like he jus’ ‘memberin’ sometin’ or sometin’. Den he says to me, an he says it wit an evil smile, he says, “Hey, Army. I dink dat the Chancllor spilled sometin’ in his office. You betta go and clean it up.” Or he said sometin’ like dat, I not ‘xactly sure, ‘cause my memory’s not too good no more, a course. Now I was jus’ happy to be gettin’ out of dere, so I ran towards the Chancellor’s office fas’ as I could. And I was glad dat I did too, ‘cause a second later Mas Ammeda, he slip on da wet floor and fall. But he didn’ chase me or nothin’ so I was okay. If he did, I might not be here taday, ‘cause those horns of his are mighty sharp, ya know. And den I end up at da Chancllor’s private office. It’s a pretty big, circular room right beneath da Gran’ Rotulanda or whateva fancy word dey thought up fer dat big meetin’ room of deirs. Da only ting in da office was a metal desk wit a throne-like chair behin’ it, and da large podium ting that the Chancllor and da Speaker and Sly whateva her name is stand on. Ya see, when dey’re ready to begin’ a meetin’ in da Rotulanda, da office cielin’ opens an den da chair lifts up into da big room. But da excitin’ thing was what was happenin’ on dis podium. I tink dey call it a chair, an I don’ know why eider. I mean, it don’ even look like a chair, but dey are all crazy in my book. Not dat I have a book or sometin’, but if I did that would be in dere. ‘Cause we’re a democracy and dat means dat I can insult anyone I wan’. Now where was I. Oh, yes, I was talkin’ ‘bout da “chair” and wha’ was happenin’ on it. I rubbed my eyes, ‘cause I tought I was seein’ things ‘cause of my ol’ age. Not that I’m that old, mine you, I’m still young enough ta do my duty for da Galacatic Repubalic. But what I was seein’, wit’ my own two eyes, not dat I got more or anyting, it’s not like my arms. And I can’ use odder people’s eyes eider, dats just one of does figurines of speech, or whateva’. And den I saw dem. Dere was two peoples, well dey weren’ really peoples, but I don’t know a betta word. One of dem was da Chancllor, oh dats righ’, I just ‘member, he’s da “Emprer” now. And he got dat new look too, I don’ like it dat much, he downright scares me. And he had one of dose red laser swords like a Jedi or sometin, ‘xcept dey don’ use red ones like his, what do dey call dem things again? Oh, yea, lightsabers. And he was fightin’ ‘gainst dat little green Jedi Masta Yoda I tink his name is. Now, Yoda, in my book, which I am gonna write one of dese days, perhaps, is a very good person. Or a very good little green alien guy. He come to a lotta meetings in da Chancellor’s office, his public one mostaly, but sometimes his private one as well. All of da Jedi always treat me real nice when dey see me, dey always say hi or be wavin’, or at least given me a polite nod. Mossly the third one actlly, but sometimes da odders. One time I even say, “May da shove be wit ya,” cause dats what I heard the Jedi say to each other. I said it to dat one big, dark-skin guy, ya know who I’m talkin’ ‘bout? He say thanks or sometin’, I forget. What were we talkin’ ‘bout? Oh, yeah, Yoda. Right. Well, Yoda is an exception even among da Jedi. He not only say hi to me, twice, not just once, mind you, but twice and I ain’t not lyin’, we had a whole conversation. He talks kinda funny like, and usually peoples wit accents and stuff annoy me, but not Yoda. Now I didn’ ‘stand what he was talking ‘bout ‘xactly but he was really nice ‘bout it, so we kind of friends now. And when he was fightin’ da Empror, wit his lil’ green lightsaber in hand, I knew dat my suspicions about da Empror was right. He don’ jus’ look evil, he is evil. But da two were in one of dose sword fights, and lemme tell you it was amazin’! Like nothin’ I ain’t never seen before. Anywayd, I didn’t wanna interrupt, and I didn’ wanna get chopped up either. I heard what ‘dem lightsabers can do ta ya, and I didn’ wanna find out if it was true. So I just stayed dere in da doorway and was watchin’ dem. But den, an’ all of a sudden like, da ceiling started ta move! I knew dat dat meant dat da chair which da two were fightin’ on was gonna rise. An’ sure ‘nough, a few seconds later, da chair started ta rise. But Yoda and da Empror didn’ even seem ta nodice. Dey was still tryin’ ta kill each odder. So I jus’ stay where I was, an’ waited for dem to take deir duel ta da Gran’ Rotlolanda. When dey did, I ran into da office, ‘cause I was curious, ya see. An’ I was lookin’ up trough da ceilin’, so dat I could see da battle. An’ dat was when I tripped over sometin’. I didn’ fall ta da groun’, ‘cause I got good balance, ya see. But when I looked down at what I had tripped ova, I saw dat it was Yoda, he’s da lil’ green Jedi ‘member, it wad his lil Gimer stick! Dats da cane dat he uses ta walk wit’. I’m surprised dat I eben ‘member what it was called, but I guess dat he tol’ me ‘bout it sometime. I don’ know where he got it, but I do ‘member dat it was sometin’ importan’ to him. So I decided, in dat instant, dat I was goin’ ta get it back ta him. So I pick it up, an’ I hurry back ta the security room. Luckly, I gotta key ta every room in da buildin’, ‘cause a bein’ da jantor an’ all. So I go on in dere, and bring up da securty cameras. An’ den I saw him, on one a da montors. He was climbin’ trough da ventlation shafts, an’ I knew dat he must be tryin’ ta escape. So I kept on watchin’ him on da cams, an’ I saw him drop out a da vents an’ into a speeda. Dere was anodda person drivin’ da speeda, an’ I knew who it was. Sentor Bail Organa. He was always nice ta me, too. An’ if he was a friend a Yoda, den he was a friend a me. And I got contacts, ya see, and I use one of dem, I can’ tell ya who dey are, ‘cause den you’d go arrest dem, an’ I snucked into Organa’s private dockin’ bay. But I didn’ wanna get in trouble, so I jus’ left da Gimer stick next ta da ship, wit a note dat said: “I tink ya dropped dis. From a friend.” An’ as I was leavin’ your peoples founded me. An’ dats how it happened. * * * “An’ dats how it happened,” the alien concluded, putting is two primary arms behind his head. Both of the interrogators exchanged a significant glance, before they cracked up in a fit of laughter. “That... is the funniest thing... I’ve ever heard,” the first one said, as he banged his hand on the metal table. When the laughing fit was finally over he said, “I don’t know what the heck that truth serum does to X’Tings, but it sure doesn’t make you tell the truth.” “Dat was da truth!” the alien protested, waving all four of his arms frantically in the air. “You expect us to believe that a little green Jedi Master managed to assassinate the Emperor, or should I say the ‘Empror,’” this brought on another fit of giggling. “Half the time, I can’t even understand what you’re saying.” “More than half the time,” the second interrogator chimed in. “Anyway, I’m through with you, freak,” the first one said. “You’re free to go.” The alien’s eyes widened in surprise, but he didn’t stop to say anything. Instead, he got up out of the chair, and rushed out of the station as fast as he could, which wasn’t as fast as he had bragged about in his story. “Imagine that,” the first one said to his partner. He looked down at the table and shook his head. “The guy is quite a story teller, I’ll give him that though.” “Yeah,” the second interrogator agreed. Before he could add anything, the door to the small room burst open and an aide ran in. “Sirs,” he said. “We have a top-priority alert to be on the lookout for a small, green Jedi. It appears that he attempted to assassinate the Emperor, and managed to escape.” For a good ten seconds, neither of the interrogators could believe what they were hearing. Then the first said to the aide, “Thank you for informing us.” The aide gave a polite nod and left the room. The two interrogators stared strait into each other’s eyes. “Do you think he might’ve actually been telling the truth?” the first one asked. They both thought about it for a moment, and then shook their heads in unison. “Naaahhhh, it couldn’t be.” And then the first added, “Could it?” -----signature----- Heart of the Sith (KotOR-era, Action/Adventure): http://boards.theforce.net/before_the_saga/b10475/29384282/p1/?2 Links to all my stories can be found at The Sith Archives: http://www.freewebs.com/lord_zeron/
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the_wandering_shadow Registered: May '05	Date Posted: 6/17/05 5:57pm Subject: RE: A Gift of Gimer (OC Challenge Response, One-Post)
	Well, that was different, not something I'd normally read, but I can't complain. Good ole' Army sounds like a mix between a Lovecraftian hick, a Gungan, Hagrid from Harry Potter, and a negro ministrel (is it okay to say, 'negro'? I wouldn't usually but that's what I've heard them called) and dats just one of does figurines of speech That was my favorite part. -----signature----- Daniel Paul Harms (1958-2007) Seph Danthar's diary @ http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/29688948/p1/ lordmaul13's partner in crime
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Lord_Zeron Registered: Mar '05	Date Posted: 6/17/05 7:45pm Subject: RE: A Gift of Gimer (OC Challenge Response, One-Post)
	Good ole' Army sounds like a mix between a Lovecraftian hick, a Gungan, Hagrid from Harry Potter, and a negro ministrel lol, thanks. That was one of my favorite parts too. Thanks for the reply. -----signature----- Heart of the Sith (KotOR-era, Action/Adventure): http://boards.theforce.net/before_the_saga/b10475/29384282/p1/?2 Links to all my stories can be found at The Sith Archives: http://www.freewebs.com/lord_zeron/
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VadersMistress Registered: Apr '04	Date Posted: 6/17/05 7:51pm Subject: RE: A Gift of Gimer (OC Challenge Response, One-Post)
	He reminded me a bit of Hagrid too, and I LOVE Hagrid. Wonderful job. "...figurines of speech." Hilarious. -----signature----- Harry Potter > Twilight Would I rather be feared or loved? Um... Easy, both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me. Persia pwns your face.
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CommanderConrad Registered: Jan '03	Date Posted: 6/17/05 9:55pm Subject: RE: A Gift of Gimer (OC Challenge Response, One-Post)
	Great character! He's really funny, and it was a sort of heartwarming story. He gave Yoda his cane back, which makes me finally notice that Yoda lost it and somehow regained it. Good work. -----signature----- I dispense from this side judgments inexorable, without the least remorse.
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amidalachick Registered: Aug '03	Date Posted: 6/18/05 7:24am Subject: RE: A Gift of Gimer (OC Challenge Response, One-Post)
	LOL! That was so good! I love how he slips in and out of the third person. And it was so nice of him to give Yoda his gimer stick back. And the ending...great! Nice work! -----signature----- "Special day? What have I forgot now? Don't panic...is it Bacon Day? No, that's crazy talk! She's getting impatient - take a stab at it! Happy...Valentine's Day?"
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Lord_Zeron Registered: Mar '05	Date Posted: 6/18/05 2:30pm Subject: RE: A Gift of Gimer (OC Challenge Response, One-Post)
	VadersMistress: Thanks. Hagrid's one of my favorite characters too, and if Army's anything like him that can only be a good thing. CommanderConrad: I'm glad you liked him, he was a fun character to write too. Yea, I noticed that when I was watching the movie, so I figured I might as well make up a Fan Fic that explains it. amidalachick: Army's brain might be a little old, but his heart (or hearts, I forget how many X'Ting have) is in the right place. I'm glad the ending was good, I thought it was a nice touch. Thank you all for your replies. -----signature----- Heart of the Sith (KotOR-era, Action/Adventure): http://boards.theforce.net/before_the_saga/b10475/29384282/p1/?2 Links to all my stories can be found at The Sith Archives: http://www.freewebs.com/lord_zeron/
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SilSolo Registered: Mar '04	Date Posted: 6/20/05 6:20pm Subject: RE: A Gift of Gimer (OC Challenge Response, One-Post)
	or Army for short That's a nice nickname. I like the characters' speech patterns. -----signature----- http://boards.theforce.net/beyond_the_saga/b10477/27517284/p1/?11 Like this quick sketch: http://www.deviantart.com/deviation/32848083/ ? Then commission me. Prices are negotiable.
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Lord_Zeron Registered: Mar '05	Date Posted: 6/20/05 7:34pm Subject: RE: A Gift of Gimer (OC Challenge Response, One-Post) - Date Edited: 6/29/05 7:21pm (1 edits total) Edited By: Lord_Zeron
	Thanks, SilSolo. I made up the nickname because of his arms, and it sort of stuck. I'm glad you enjoyed his unique accent. -----signature----- Heart of the Sith (KotOR-era, Action/Adventure): http://boards.theforce.net/before_the_saga/b10475/29384282/p1/?2 Links to all my stories can be found at The Sith Archives: http://www.freewebs.com/lord_zeron/
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