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Author	Topic: Padmé’s Ruminations [ROTS angst vig]
Idrelle_Miocovani Title: Solar Power loving Scattergories Hostess Registered: Feb '05	Date Posted: 7/26/05 6:58am Subject: Padmé’s Ruminations [ROTS angst vig]
	Title: Padmé’s Ruminations Author: Idrelle_Miocovani Time frame: ROTS Genre: Angst Characters: Padmé Summary: Padmé reflects after what Obi-Wan has told her. Notes: This is my weekly vig and has been done in a style that I have never tried before. Beware: the style will probably cause it to be odd. This has been inspired by the track called Padmé’s Ruminations on the ROTS soundtrack. This is unbetaed. VIGNETTE FOR THE WEEK OF JULY 24 – JULY 30 ______________________________________________________________________________________________ “Anakin is the father, isn’t he?” You can’t bear to look at him. The shock of hearing what has just poured from his lips is enough to make you feel sick. A numbness has filled you… a numbness that seemingly will never withdraw. You don’t answer. You are hardly aware of the tears leaking from your eyes. “I’m very sorry, Padmé. If it could be different…” “Go away, Obi-Wan.” Your voice has attained a certain amount of harshness. The thing you want most in the universe is for him to just go away. Him, who has brought such despair into your life. “I won’t help you. I can’t.” You pause, urging him to leave as quickly as possible. “I won’t help you kill him.” There is a durasteel tone to your voice now. You feel cold all over now. The room is slowly ebbing away from your vision; as is everything in it. Soon, all that will be left is you, your grief and the hateful, shocking, untruthful news which this man has brought you. This Jedi Master. “I’m very sorry.” His voice is distant. It seems to echo faintly. He is leaving, he is going… You are left alone to wallow in your anguish. To let your mind ponder the truth. To be consumed by the numbing hate, the feeling that you are hopelessly trapped in a world that is assembled by your worst fears and doubts, by the sense of terrible wounds to come… Your mind is whirling. The hours, the minutes, the seconds all seem to have stopped flowing. The course of time itself has halted into one large, agonizing moment in which you are all alone. All alone to think, all alone to decide what must be done… Your thoughts are a jumbled mass, but out of that chaotic mess comes Obi-Wan’s words. His clear words. His loud words. His soft words. His harsh words. Words of all emotions that are telling you the – The truth. They’re telling you the truth? Those harmful, hurtful, wounding words are… How could it be, Anakin would never – You know your husband. You know him better than anyone else! You know he would never— “I’m not the Jedi I should be.” Your insides twist uncomfortably as growing fear creeps up on you. Knowledge breeds fear. You have been blind. Blinded by your love for him. You should have seen it. In your heart, you’ve known all along. You know the truth. Anakin… your Ani… You raise a hand to your forehead, but you can’t feel the touch of your own fingers upon your own skin. The numbness, your aching heart, has taken over. It’s all you can feel. No outside senses matter now. You have lost all connection with the world beyond your thoughts. It is a dark world, filled with despair and anger and loss. But it is nothing compared to the darkness of your thoughts. The hopelessness. He has told you the truth and you know it. Jedi don’t lie. He has gone to kill your husband because he knows that it is the only way of saving the Galaxy from certain destruction. The snippet of japor, so long ago carved by the hands of a child, so long ago made with love, falls into your hands. Through blurred eyes you examine it. It is the connection between your thoughts and the world beyond… it is the connection between the past and the present. It is the connection between you and your love. The ultimate connection between you and Anakin. You know what you must do. No matter what it takes, you must see him again. You must try to convince him to come with you… nothing else matters but you, him and your love. Nothing. That is what the snippet of japor proves. It is also the trace the memory of the smiling, young slave-boy you had known all those years ago on Tatooine. How comforting the past is when all that brooded on the future’s horizon is darkness. C-3PO has stumbled into view, his golden body gleaming. For once, you are pleased to see him. Anakin gave him to you. Another connection. “Threepio?” you ask, holding out the pendant that hangs from your neck. “Do you know what this is?” The protocol droid does not hesitate in giving a lengthy answer. You barely listen. A name has appeared in your memory. Mustafar. He’s on Mustafar. That is where you will find him. “…seeing as how you’ve worn that one ever since it was given to you so many years ago by Master An—” The protocol droid’s words have brought you back to the present. “I hadn’t forgotten what it was, Threepio,” you say quietly, your hand dropping the snippet. “Thank you. I was… reminding myself of the boy who gave it to me.” “My lady?” The droid sounds confused. It does not matter. You have made your decision. All that matters is Anakin. You will save him yourself if you must. Love is on your side. “Contact Captain Typho. Have him ready my skiff.” “My lady?” 3PO asks again. “Are you going somewhere.” No, not just you. You’ll take the droid with you. “We are,” you reply calmly. “We’re going to Mustafar.” And there, all will be set right. It has to be set right – for your child’s sake. For your future family’s sake. If all goes wrong, you may never have a family of your own. This has only sealed your steely determination to complete this personal mission. ______________________________________________________________________________________________ -----signature----- "Can I just run by my battle cry?" "As you run, as you fight the evil Lord Vader—" "I'll turn on my lightsaber, look him straight in the helmet and, to make you proud, I will yell out 'the Canadians are coming, the Canadians are coming!'" Ish's Padawan
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Healer_Leona Registered: Jul '00	Date Posted: 7/26/05 7:27am Subject: RE: Padmé’s Ruminations [ROTS angst vig]
	Oh my, such heartfelt emotions. Really superb Idrelle. -----signature----- To me, you're strange and you're beautiful, You'd be so perfect with me but you just can't see, You turn every head but you don't see me.
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JediMasterRev Registered: Dec '04	Date Posted: 7/26/05 7:28am Subject: RE: Padmé’s Ruminations [ROTS angst vig]
	I think you very skillfully captured Padme's conflicting thoughts after her brief encounter with Obi-Wan Yet, despite what she believes Anakn has done, her love is such that won't allow her to give up on him. I really liked how you formatted this piece. Using the second person really illustrated her thoughts, as well as, her feelings and conflicts. This was very well done. Enjoyed it immensely. Keep up the good work! -----signature----- "This above all, to thine own self be true." Polonius, Hamlet, Act I, Scene III For the Love of the Queen: http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/24151408/p1/?0 The Naboo Chronicles: http://boards.theforce.net/The_Saga/b10476/18644312/?162
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oqidaun Title: Manager Emeritus Registered: Jul '05	Date Posted: 7/26/05 7:53am Subject: RE: Padmé’s Ruminations [ROTS angst vig]
	I know from your notes that you're experimenting with a new style for your vignette--so all of my comments are aimed at being constructive with this in mind. First off, you got me. I couldn't resist putting on the soundtrack while I read this. Nice! I read fast, but it's in time with music, right? Here's the only little quibbley whiney thing I've got going on--I want a little more, just a bite or two extra and I'll be satisfied. Don't get me wrong, it's a structurally sound piece and it conveys a deep sense of loss and confusion, but there's a just little bit of something that's missing. You do an excellent job talking about feelings and this gut wrenching realization that is sweeping over Padme as she comes to terms with the fact that everything in her life that has meant something to her is about to come crashing down around her ankles. This is the kind of thing that you never want to experience, this is Padme's worse case scenario, what else could go wrong? Think about the things that would go through your mind as this was happening, which you're already doing, but what about the other things? You've got all of the elements there: the anger, the despair, the attempt to reconnect the past and most importantly perhaps in Padme's case, the guilt--the feeling that you've got to go and try to do something to change this. Yet, what about the child? How does the thought of raising a child from a secret marriage all by yourself factor into all of this? What about those other little selfish things that sneak into to our thoughts? Maybe build a little more of this humanity into it--it's angst, stab your readers with an ice-pick! Again, I'm not being snipey (is that word?), I'm just rambling on in this review, because your vignette has really got me thinking. You've got all of the good stuff here and I think if you do a little more exploration you're really going to have something neat. Also you could build on this scene from multiple angles: play around with your POV, how would this sound in the first person or in the third. What's C3PO seeing? This reads aloud well. I don't know if you read it out loud as you type or if you proof it that way, but after my second read of it that really helped to capitalize on some of feelings--all of my stuff is proofed aloud and that's one of my top considerations with regard to flow. This is good, don't think that I am saying otherwise. It's just on the cusp of really getting into the chewy stuff that makes angst heartwrenching and so very emotional and also quite addictive. I am anxious to go back and read some of your other vignettes and since this is a weekly exercise for you, I'm definitely going to be watching for it. PM me if I miss one. -----signature----- . . . .
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Idrelle_Miocovani Title: Solar Power loving Scattergories Hostess Registered: Feb '05	Date Posted: 7/26/05 10:25am Subject: RE: Padmé’s Ruminations [ROTS angst vig]
	Healer_Leona: Thanks! JediMasterRev:Thank you! oqidaun: Thanks for the very lovely comments and the review. -----signature----- "Can I just run by my battle cry?" "As you run, as you fight the evil Lord Vader—" "I'll turn on my lightsaber, look him straight in the helmet and, to make you proud, I will yell out 'the Canadians are coming, the Canadians are coming!'" Ish's Padawan
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DarthIshtar Title: Former CR Registered: Mar '01	Date Posted: 7/26/05 11:52am Subject: RE: Padmé’s Ruminations [ROTS angst vig]
	Ack! Such blind faith that works perfectly with that music. It was so heartbreaking. I love the hand on the forehead thing because it explains so much about her body language when they first arrive on Mustafar. This was REALLY well done. -----signature----- "I feel like a more down-to-earth Pink 5 when I'm writing Leah. Same attitude, less lip gloss." ~Me on how to get in the right mindset for Twilight fanfic.
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Briman Registered: Oct '04	Date Posted: 7/26/05 7:40pm Subject: RE: Padmé’s Ruminations [ROTS angst vig]
	A beautiful viggie! -----signature----- The Force is with you young Skywalker, but you are not a Jedi yet --Vader But all warriors must fall one day-ROSE I
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bobilll Registered: Aug '02	Date Posted: 7/27/05 6:34pm Subject: RE: Padmé’s Ruminations [ROTS angst vig]
	Wow, I almost had to run and check to see if this was Stover himself writing! That's one of the best Stover-style fics I've read in a while (ok, I'm biased. I love A/P fics...)! I agree that it really matches with the song. So heartfelt... -----signature----- You'll have to buy him a sweater.
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MirandaFair Registered: Jun '05	Date Posted: 7/27/05 7:15pm Subject: RE: Padmé’s Ruminations [ROTS angst vig]
	Nicely done. A very beautiful vig on one of my (and probably everyone elses) favorite parts of RotS. -----signature----- May the Muse be with you.
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Idrelle_Miocovani Title: Solar Power loving Scattergories Hostess Registered: Feb '05	Date Posted: 8/6/05 2:16pm Subject: RE: Padmé’s Ruminations [ROTS angst vig]
	DarthIshtar: Thanks! Briman: Thanks for reading! bobilll: Thank you! MirandaFair: Yes, it's one of my favourite parts too. Thanks for reading! -----signature----- "Can I just run by my battle cry?" "As you run, as you fight the evil Lord Vader—" "I'll turn on my lightsaber, look him straight in the helmet and, to make you proud, I will yell out 'the Canadians are coming, the Canadians are coming!'" Ish's Padawan
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Jazz_Skywalker Registered: Aug '02	Date Posted: 8/6/05 6:52pm Subject: RE: Padmé’s Ruminations [ROTS angst vig]
	Very lovely! I could feel Padme's pain so well! jazz -----signature----- currently working on NaNo 2007 (won) 11/24: 50,000+!
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