Author Topic: Tangible- L/M viggie, sometime relatively post TTT
Bri_Windstar 
Registered: May '02
8175_Mara Jade
Date Posted: 9/2/04 7:42pm Subject: Tangible- L/M viggie, sometime relatively post TTT - Date Edited: 9/2/04 7:43pm (2 edits total) Edited By: Bri_Windstar
*waves* happy

I'll be honest, I have no idea what this is or what I'm doing writing this thing, but, like always, I finally got around to it and here it is. tongue

Also its unbetaed (like always, heh), so its a bit rough around the edges. I guess I just felt like writing something, anything, and this is what came out of that.

A summary, you ask? *thinks* Well, its kind of simple. There are just some things that Mara isn't ready to hear.

Oh, and the disclaimer (i never remember this thing): Not mine. No money. Nuff said.

Now onward.



Tangible



Her steps slowed as she came closer to his quarters, her heart beating just that much faster. A flicker of annoyance at her anxiety caused her to stop short of his door. She took a deep breath, pushed the thought away, and breezed through the door as though she had not a care in the world. He looked up from his desk in the study as she came in, stopping a few feet from him, rocking back on her heels and clasping her hands behind her back. His presence greeted her with a paradox, as though he was at once shocked and reassured that she would be there. His face, however, gave none of this away, and it was a mask of impassivity that greeted her as he merely said, “Mara.”

His supposed neutrality shouldn’t have surprised her, and it didn’t. “I need to speak with you,” she said. “Do you have a moment?”

He put his pen down and leaned back in his chair. “Sure, I’m not very busy. What is it you need?”

“I got a relay from Karrde earlier today. He’s asked me to come back.”

If he had been expecting a conversation with her, this wasn’t what he’d apparently had in mind. This time his emotions did get the better of him as he sat forward in his chair and stared at her. “What?” he asked in disbelief.

Her demeanor remained stoic. “I’m leaving, Luke,” she said simply.

“I heard you,” he said in a more controlled manner. “I’m asking why. Karrde said that you could take as much time away as you wanted. What’s changed?”

“Apparently something has come up, some deal gone awry or what not. He can’t attend to it because he’s currently on business elsewhere in the Outer Rim territory. It needs to be taken care of.”

He rolled his eyes at this. “And of course he has no one else to handle it. That’s highly convenient for you, Mara. That, and the timing.”

She snorted at his incredulity. “Whether you believe it or not, Skywalker, I have responsibilities to things and people other than you.” She pretended not to see the sting of her venomous retort register in his presence, and he pretended not to feel it.

“What about your responsibilities here, Mara? You aren’t done with your training. You have things here yet to finish.”

“We both knew my time her was short and limited, Luke. Don’t pretend otherwise,” she shot back defensively. “Don’t fool yourself into thinking this is all about you.”

He smacked his hand down on the desk in frustration, and inwardly the reaction startled her. She was not used to seeing him give in to venting his emotion like that. On the outside, of course, she gave no sign of this. She never did. He got out from behind the desk and came to stand in front of her. She looked up at him, meeting his gaze head on.

“This is about me, Mara. It’s about you and me and something you aren’t ready to face.”

She should have known this wouldn’t be easy. Nothing with him ever was.

“I love you, and you aren’t ready for that.”

And there it was, right in front of her once more. It was not the first time he had said that to her. The first time was what had brought all this about to begin with. Somewhere deep inside, she knew he was right, but right now in the heat of the argument, she wasn’t about to give him the pleasure of her yeilding so easily.

“You’re damn right I’m not ready for that! What did you expect? I’m here because you asked me to be here. I’m spending time with you, all this time, and it’s wonderful and amazing and gratifying. It makes me feel things I’ve never felt before, but it’s all happening so fast and it’s wild and intense and it’s out of control and I’m not ready for that!” she stopped, the high and desperate pitch her voice had taken on surprising them both. He was the first to recover.

“I understand that, I guess. I just don’t understand why,” he said, some of the edge gone from his tone. Now there was just the need to know what the problem was and how to go about fixing it. So typical of him, she should have seen it coming. “What have I done, Mara? What more do you want from me that I haven’t already given to you?”

Her voice also lost some of its fire. He did have a right to an honest answer. “I want something real, something tangible,” she answered. “I want something that I know is there and that I can always count on.”

“Mara, this is real,” Luke said emphatically. “What we have is real. Why can’t you feel that?” He grabbed her arm as she looked away. “Why are you running?”

He stopped short as she glared at him and he felt her stiffen in his grasp, her fire seemingly ready to come back in full force. He knew at once that he had said the wrong thing. The accusation that she was running implied a sign of weakness, which, as far as Mara was concerned, she did not possess. Relenting, he released her arm and apologized. “I’m sorry.”

She looked away again, agitation playing across her features. He watched her carefully, waiting to see what she would do next. After a long pause, she turned her expression downward and sighed, her posture softening slightly in resignation.

“No, you’re right,” she said in a quiet voice, not meeting his eyes. “I am running.”

He smiled slightly. “Mara, look at me. Look at me.” When she wouldn’t, he cupped her chin and turned her head slowly towards him, forcing her to acknowledge him. She looked at him questioningly, and in her eyes he saw a vulnerability he was not used to seeing. “Mara, it’s only me,” he said, his voice soft and reassuring, his eyes searching hers imploringly. “What are you so afraid of?”

“It’s unnerving how you can read me so well,” she replied. “You know me better than I know myself. I’m not used to that. All my life, the one person I knew I could always rely on was myself. I was the only person that I knew would never let me down. Even Palpatine--“ her voice hitched as she struggled for words. Luke waited for her to continue, knowing that even this bit of openness was hard for her.

“I served him without question, and he used me. I was so blind. He manipulated me, and the worst part of it is that I let him. He did it so easily and for so long; it’s not an easy thing to accept, even now. I promised myself that I would never let someone do that to me again. I realize that isn’t really here nor there, but I can’t help but feel the same sense of submission. It scares me to put my trust, my faith, in you because I’m afraid of what will happen. I lose myself to my emotions, and that takes away my control over the situation. You force me to be so open and honest- not just with you, but with myself as well. You force me to let my walls down and let you in. I feel safe with you. If that were to ever be taken away from me, if you were to ever take that from me…” she trailed off, at a loss for words. Finally, she shook her head. “I don’t know what I would do.”

He placed his hands on her cheeks, gently wiping away the few stray tears that had found their way down her face, and looked her deep in the eyes. “I’m not going anywhere, Mara. I’m here; I’m right here. I always will be, because I love you. Put faith in that. Put faith in me.” He kissed her for a long moment, and then put his forehead against hers. She closed her eyes as she fought against the wave of emotions flowing through her.

“Put faith in us.”

Opening her eyes, she looked into his, seeing nothing but sincerity and reassurance, and she nodded ardently even as the remains of her scarce tears weighed upon her face. There was something in those eyes, in his words, in him, that gave her the courage to feel what she needed to feel.





 

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TheCrazyRodian 
Registered: Mar '04
Date Posted: 9/2/04 7:55pm Subject: RE: Tangible- L/M viggie, sometime relatively post TTT
Luke and Mara are always so cute when they fight and end up kissing.

 

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LadyPadme 
Title: Manager Emeritus
Registered: Sep '02
44384_Princess Leia
Date Posted: 9/2/04 8:14pm Subject: RE: Tangible- L/M viggie, sometime relatively post TTT


BRI!!!!!

You're here! You've WRITTEN SOMETHING!!! shock

Wow, great to see you around dancing

Onto the viggie:

As usual, lovely!

He smacked his hand down on the desk in frustration, and inwardly the reaction startled her. She was not used to seeing him give in to venting his emotion like that.

- A true testament to how strongly Luke is feeling about what's going on if he's going to give in to his emotions like this in front of her.

“You’re damn right I’m not ready for that! What did you expect? I’m here because you asked me to be here. I’m spending time with you, all this time, and it’s wonderful and amazing and gratifying. It makes me feel things I’ve never felt before, but it’s all happening so fast and it’s wild and intense and it’s out of control and I’m not ready for that!”

- Beautiful! Of course Mara would never admit to any sort of fear without a good accompanying spout of anger and indignation to mask her true emotions.

“Mara, it’s only me,” he said, his voice soft and reassuring, his eyes searching hers imploringly. “What are you so afraid of?”

PERFECT! Just wonderful, chica! It sent goosebumps down my spine dancing Basically, there's no greater compliment I can give than that. Just perfect!

And I love Mara's explanation of how she felt used by Palpatine that made her so wary of exposing herself emotionally.

And I'm so glad you gave it a happy ending happy

Great work, m'dear! hugs rose

 

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MJSLSBS 
Registered: Dec '03
8174_Mara and Luke
Date Posted: 9/2/04 8:27pm Subject: RE: Tangible- L/M viggie, sometime relatively post TTT
wow that is sooo good. i loved it.
l/m are so cute whent they argue and then end up kissing

god job!

 

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green_eyes 
Registered: Apr '04
13991_Luke Hippo
Date Posted: 9/2/04 9:22pm Subject: RE: Tangible- L/M viggie, sometime relatively post TTT
I love Luke and Mara. This is a great little viggie.
It so good to see Luke stand up to her when she is running and make her face what she doesn't want to face.
Was this a one poster? Or do you have more planned?

*green_eyes*

 

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RebelMom 
Title: TFF Secretary
Registered: Apr '00
44413_Luke Skywalker
Date Posted: 9/2/04 9:53pm Subject: RE: Tangible- L/M viggie, sometime relatively post TTT
Bri! [face_shocked] You wrote something again.

You did great. I could envision the scene perfectly. Characterizations were good too.

You must write more often. happy

 

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Lonewolf89 
Registered: Sep '01
8006_Han Solo
Date Posted: 9/2/04 10:04pm Subject: RE: Tangible- L/M viggie, sometime relatively post TTT
“I served him without question, and he used me. I was so blind. He manipulated me, and the worst part of it is that I let him. He did it so easily and for so long; it’s not an easy thing to accept, even now. I promised myself that I would never let someone do that to me again. I realize that isn’t really here nor there, but I can’t help but feel the same sense of submission. It scares me to put my trust, my faith, in you because I’m afraid of what will happen..."

You captured Mara beautifully! The reasons behind her mistrust in her relationship with Luke were very really, very Mara.

I also liked how you wrote the exchange between her and Luke. It, too, seemed characteristic of them.

Great job! grin

 

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Gabri_Jade 
Title: Fan Fiction Archive Editor Emeritus
Registered: Nov '02
23035_Mara Jade
Date Posted: 9/2/04 10:15pm Subject: RE: Tangible- L/M viggie, sometime relatively post TTT
What LP said. tongue

Hiya, Bri! hugs Love the viggie! grin

His supposed neutrality shouldn’t have surprised her, and it didn’t. “I need to speak with you,” she said. “Do you have a moment?”

He put his pen down and leaned back in his chair. “Sure, I’m not very busy. What is it you need?”


Here I started thinking Yavin IV, and Mara being there for Jedi training. I love that you went entirely a different way. grin

He smacked his hand down on the desk in frustration, and inwardly the reaction startled her.

LP got it exactly. Wonderful detail!

And there it was, right in front of her once more. It was not the first time he had said that to her. The first time was what had brought all this about to begin with.

Oh, I love this, that it's an ongoing thing between them instead of the first time Luke's said it. love

“You’re damn right I’m not ready for that! What did you expect? I’m here because you asked me to be here. I’m spending time with you, all this time, and it’s wonderful and amazing and gratifying. It makes me feel things I’ve never felt before, but it’s all happening so fast and it’s wild and intense and it’s out of control and I’m not ready for that!” she stopped, the high and desperate pitch her voice had taken on surprising them both.

Bri, my darling, you do such a wonderful job portraying Mara's vulnerability. It's one of the trickiest aspects of her character, and has tripped up many a profic writer, but you get it dead on each time. LP is absolutely right (again tongue ), and I also love how once she starts speaking, the words start pouring out on top of each other and she can't stop them. I also love the detail about her tone of voice. Very nicely done. grin

“Mara, this is real,” Luke said emphatically. “What we have is real. Why can’t you feel that?” He grabbed her arm as she looked away. “Why are you running?”

Hee hee! I remember you mentioning this part. Beautifully done. hugs

“Mara, it’s only me,” he said, his voice soft and reassuring, his eyes searching hers imploringly. “What are you so afraid of?”

Again, my evil twin speaks for us both. I had the same reaction. love

It scares me to put my trust, my faith, in you because I’m afraid of what will happen. I lose myself to my emotions, and that takes away my control over the situation. You force me to be so open and honest- not just with you, but with myself as well. You force me to let my walls down and let you in. I feel safe with you. If that were to ever be taken away from me, if you were to ever take that from me…” she trailed off, at a loss for words. Finally, she shook her head. “I don’t know what I would do.”

Wonderful! grin Perfect analysis, just how Mara would feel. I especially like how Mara's not as afraid of simply feeling this way as she is the thought of losing what they have; that if she gives up all control of the situation, she might lose what has become so precious to her. Better to take control and stop it herself now before it means too much from her and is somehow taken away, leaving her as alone and empty as she was after Palpatine died. That's also a great little touch, that she's afraid of the possibility of Luke himself taking it away from her. After all, Palpatine betrayed her. No matter what, the fear of betrayal had to be part of her psyche for a very long time afterward. Mara is vastly more vulnerable emotionally than she ever allowed herself to acknowledge, and Luke has always had a way of forcing her to face that vulnerability.

He placed his hands on her cheeks, gently wiping away the few stray tears that had found their way down her face, and looked her deep in the eyes. “I’m not going anywhere, Mara. I’m here; I’m right here. I always will be, because I love you. Put faith in that. Put faith in me.” He kissed her for a long moment, and then put his forehead against hers. She closed her eyes as she fought against the wave of emotions flowing through her.

“Put faith in us.”


*melts* love love love

*sighs happily* I just love your writing, Bri. Got any more little bunnies nibbling away at you? tongue

 

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The Space Between Heartbeats - L/M AU vig http://boards.theforce.net/b/b1/28870280
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red_rose_knight 
Registered: Sep '01
41172_Stormtrooper Bunny
Date Posted: 9/5/04 8:31am Subject: RE: Tangible- L/M viggie, sometime relatively post TTT
That was great. happy I enjoyed seeing that facet of their relationship and the look into Mara's fears. Lovely.

 

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Jedi-2B 
Registered: Nov '00
42320_Luke Skywalker
Date Posted: 9/5/04 10:24am Subject: RE: Tangible- L/M viggie, sometime relatively post TTT
Everyone's already pointed out all the poignant parts, so I'll just reiterate that this was a wonderful little vignette. Great characterizations of both of them, and good to see you back!

 

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It was on her fifteenth day in the darkness of the Nirauan cave when Mara Jade awoke to discover a rescuer had finally arrived.
It was not, however, any of the potential rescuers she would have expected.
It was Luke.
~~And the rest is history~~
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Jedi Trace 
Title:
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Registered: Dec '99
46275_Morrigan Corde
Date Posted: 9/5/04 11:02am Subject: RE: Tangible- L/M viggie, sometime relatively post TTT
He placed his hands on her cheeks, gently wiping away the few stray tears that had found their way down her face, and looked her deep in the eyes. “I’m not going anywhere, Mara. I’m here; I’m right here. I always will be, because I love you. Put faith in that. Put faith in me.” He kissed her for a long moment, and then put his forehead against hers. She closed her eyes as she fought against the wave of emotions flowing through her.

“Put faith in us.”



*sigh* love

Beautiful!

 

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LaYa_ 
Registered: Jul '03
42770_Natalie Portman
Date Posted: 9/5/04 11:26am Subject: RE: Tangible- L/M viggie, sometime relatively post TTT
Lovely viggie love

 

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Bri_Windstar 
Registered: May '02
8175_Mara Jade
Date Posted: 9/6/04 10:59am Subject: RE: Tangible- L/M viggie, sometime relatively post TTT
One of these days, i'll also learn how to post speedy replies tongue



TheCrazyRodian: Aye, that they are. Thank you!



LP: LOL LP!! My word. *hugs* And yes, I’ve written something. Miracle of miracles. tongue

*blushes furiously* blush You’re always too kind to me. Heh, guess I’m not known for happy endings. tongue What can I say, they deserve one once in a while.



MJSLSBS: *laughs* That seems to be a common assessment. Thank you!



green_eyes: Thanks! Luke’s not one to let things go easily, and I think she knows that. In the interest of protecting herself, though, she feels she has to try. Poor Mara. sad tongue

And that’s it, actually. It was a one-shot.



RM: *giggles madly* Yeah, I kind of shocked myself with writing something, too. All I can say was that is was about darn time. It was driving bonkers. As for writing more… *looks wary* tongue

Thank you happy



Lonewolf89: Characterization is something that always makes me cringe, because I never think I get it right. I think it’s with good reason, at any rate. Mara’s a tricky little thing.

I’m glad you liked it! happy



Gabri: Gabri!! *hugs*

I swear, you are always far too kind to me. *blushes furiously* You and your evil twin both. tongue

This one actually just kind of, I don’t know, wrote itself. I just started, and then didn’t stop. It’s probably the fastest I’ve ever written anything. Force knows that made me even more anal about whether or not it was at least headed in the right direction.

As for more plot bunnies, always m’dear. It’s just a matter of paying them any serious attention. tongue



red_rose_knight: Thank you! happy



Jedi-2b: Thanks, it’s good to be back. It’s amazing how much you miss with even just a few months away.



Jedi Trace: Thank you! happy



LaYa_: Thank you! happy

 

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Mediocrity- it takes a lot less time and most people won't notice the difference before it's too late.
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VaderLVR64 
Title: Fan Fic Manager in Combat Boots
Registered: Feb '04
40219_Obi- Wan<br>and Beru
Date Posted: 9/6/04 11:09am Subject: RE: Tangible- L/M viggie, sometime relatively post TTT
Oh this was a great peek into Mara and Luke's relationship! Wonderful work!

 

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Mirax-Jade 
Registered: Mar '03
13894_Black Sun
Date Posted: 9/6/04 11:17am Subject: RE: Tangible- L/M viggie, sometime relatively post TTT
Wow this was great. I love L/M fight-love fics. ::sigh::

Perfect characterisation. <-spelled that wrong methinks--


Anyway, I loved it!! You should write more of these. grin

 

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StarFighter5 
Registered: Jul '03
24124_Indiana Jones
Date Posted: 9/6/04 2:17pm Subject: RE: Tangible- L/M viggie, sometime relatively post TTT
I loved this. It was great!

 

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