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Topic:
Illicit Acts (OCs: a man and a woman and a one-room hostel)
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lazykbys
Registered:
Oct '04
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Date Posted:
3/11/05 9:30pm
Subject:
Illicit Acts (OCs: a man and a woman and a one-room hostel)
- Date Edited:
3/12/05 12:22am (1 edits total)
Edited By:
lazykbys
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Title: Illicit Acts
Author: lazykbys
Timeframe: BftS
Characters: two unnamed OCs
Genre: vignette
Keywords:
Summary: A man and a woman and a one-room hostel.
Note to Indexer: Sorry, but I wanted to keep the details of this fic as vague as possible.
Illicit Acts
The bar was one of many in the less respectable part of town. Soft music and tabac smoke filled the air. Combined with the low lighting, they created pockets of privacy that was the real reason people came.
He knew he shouldn't. But he also knew he couldn't not, which was why he kept coming here.
She was sitting at the counter, as she always did. Most of the time she was clad in a dress that seemed to reveal more than it actually did. Sometimes she wore flowers in her hair despite the fact that the fumes from various beverages made the petals wilt before long. Or perhaps she wore them for that very reason: as a reminder that she didn't really belong here.
She smiled when she saw him. It was the same sad smile that said we have to stop meeting like this.
"Hi," she said with feigned cheerfulness. "Fancy meeting you here."
"I'm sorry. I tried not to come, but I couldn't help it." He reached into his pocket and pulled out a card key. "I have a room -"
She held up a callused hand. "I know you do. You always do. But please, let me pretend that it isn't what you came here for. That it isn't what I came here for."
"If that's what you want," he said. He ordered a glass of cold diluted water. It was the only thing he could trust himself to drink in this place.
"Have you been well?" he asked.
"Yes, thank you. And how -" He saw how her reflexive politeness almost returned the question, but she caught herself just in time. She frowned and said, "That was a mean trick."
"I'm sorry. I really am. But when I'm with you, I can't think of anything else but -"
"Shh." She placed a silencing finger on his lips. Like the rest of her hand, it was rough from years of hard work. He savored its touch like a man in the desert finding water for the first time.
His shaking hands slowly reached up to touch hers. "Please," he whispered. "Please."
She sighed. "Of course."
-----
She followed him out of the bar and up the street to a one-room hostel. It was one they'd used many times before. They said that the droid behind the counter had its memory wiped every day to avoid embarrassment. Nevertheless, she felt that it remembered her from the other times.
Then again, she thought that even the unconscious man sprawled out on the steps recognized her.
The room had little in the way of furnishings. A bed, a table, a lamp, a chair, a holovid viewer -
The 'fresher was at the end of the hallway. She wished she didn't know this. But she did.
He was already sitting on the bed with his jacket off. When her eyes met his, he smiled at her to come join him.
"I shouldn't be here," she said.
"Why not?" he asked. "Please, don't say that. I need you."
"But I shouldn't. I'm going to be a Jedi Knight. It's wrong for me to keep doing this."
"Don't say that," he pleaded. "Please don't. What we do - it's not forbidden, is it? It doesn't harm anyone, does it?"
"No, it's not and it doesn't. But - but it's not right."
"Was it wrong the first time?"
"No," she said. At the time, it wasn't. "But -"
"Or the second?"
"No." The word came out as a hoarse whisper. "It wasn't."
"I need you," he said. "You're the only one who understands. Not my wife, not my children, not my boss or co-workers - just you."
She shook her head. "You don't need me. You only think you do."
"I'm seeing an analyst," he said. "Just like you asked me to. But I couldn't talk to her like I can talk to you. I don't know what I should say. She makes me feel stupid. You don't."
The look he gave her was one she was not at all comfortable with. It was the gaze of a sinner seeing his god or perhaps an addict his fix - knowing that salvation was within his grasp but not yet daring to reach out.
She knew now that the first time had been a mistake. His will had been weak and so had hers, and at the time she thought she was doing him a kindness. She had never thought he'd be coming back for more, and more, and more . . .
And she had to admit: it had felt so good at first. She had been going through a period of self-doubt, wondering if she'd ever be chosen to be a padawan. She'd gone into the city to try and forget herself, and had met a man who had troubles of his own.
Even then, she'd known vaguely that she was too young to do what she did. She kept it a secret to avoid punishment, and when she realized just how wrong it was, it was too late to confess.
But by then he knew who she was. Even worse, he knew that they shared her secret.
"Please," he croaked.
She nodded silently, and reached out to cup his cheeks in her hands. He shivered at her touch and let out a long sigh.
"You will let go of your anger," she said, reaching out with the Force to touch his mind. She found the knot of repressed emotions, and eased it just so . . .
-----
"I will let go of my anger," he repeated. As he said those words, it was as though a great weight had been lifted off his back. He felt like he could stand tall and walk straight once more. It was like entering null-G.
Then he saw her shoulders sag, and realized he had done it again.
"I'm - I'm so sorry," he stammered. "I mean to be strong - I try so hard - but it's so difficult at times -"
"Shh. I know. You don't have to apologize."
"This will be the last time. I know I keep saying that, but this time I mean it. Really."
She smiled that sad smile of hers that meant we have to stop meeting like this.
Both of them knew they shouldn't. But they also knew they couldn't not, which was why they kept seeing each other.
-----signature-----
I would greatly appreciate any constructive criticism you can give me. Please feel free to PM me with your comments. . by the same author (click and scroll dowwwn): http://boards.theforce.net/m/b1/17609715/r17736763
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Healer_Leona
Registered:
Jul '00
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Date Posted:
3/12/05 5:00am
Subject:
RE: Illicit Acts (OCs: a man and a woman and a one-room hostel)
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That was excellent. You painted a sad and dark portrait of two people lost in their compulsions. I liked how you lead us in one direction to be shown what they did was not what our minds thought.
A very good piece indeed!
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Still crazy after all these years.
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Gina
Registered:
Jun '03
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Date Posted:
3/12/05 7:52am
Subject:
RE: Illicit Acts (OCs: a man and a woman and a one-room hostel)
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So sad. You portrayed their guilt and helplessness to overcome their need for each other very well.
Sometimes she wore flowers in her hair despite the fact that the fumes from various beverages made the petals wilt before long. Or perhaps she wore them for that very reason: as a reminder that she didn't really belong here.
I especially liked this.
Well done. 
-----signature-----
A long time ago in a house far away, there was a mother who was strong in the ways of the Force.
She "forced" her sons to clean their room, she "forced" her sons to behave.
- Part of a story written by my 9 yr. old sons I found while cleaning their desks
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lazykbys_left
Registered:
Feb '05
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Date Posted:
3/13/05 2:00am
Subject:
RE: Illicit Acts (OCs: a man and a woman and a one-room hostel)
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Healer_Leona:
That was excellent. You painted a sad and dark portrait of two people lost in their compulsions. I liked how you lead us in one direction to be shown what they did was not what our minds thought.
What did you think it was? [face_mwahahaha]
Lately I've been thinking (obsessively?) about the guiding/manipulating aspects of the Force. Something about the mind whammy made me think about it as a "quick fix". I've been reading the Mature Topic Discussion Threads as well, and one thing lead to another and here we are.
Thank you for reading!
Gina:
So sad. You portrayed their guilt and helplessness to overcome their need for each other very well.
Sometimes she wore flowers in her hair despite the fact that the fumes from various beverages made the petals wilt before long. Or perhaps she wore them for that very reason: as a reminder that she didn't really belong here.
I especially liked this.
This started out as a fic about a Jedi doing the mind whammy for credits (the original title was Prostitution). I think her character changed for me when I switched POVs in the middle. After adding the bit about the flowers, I couldn't think of her as anything else.
Thank you for reading!
-----signature-----
"You're like some kind of link machine." - rhonderoo It didn't stop being magic just because you found out how it was done. DARK SIDE FHTAGN lazykbys fanfic index (click and scroll dowwwn): http://boards.theforce.net/m/b1/17609715/r17736763
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imzadi
Registered:
Sep '00
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Date Posted:
3/13/05 3:37am
Subject:
RE: Illicit Acts (OCs: a man and a woman and a one-room hostel)
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Wonderful! What an interesting take on a Jedi and what they would consider illicit. It's good to see a Jedi who makes mistakes within the realm of their duties, it adds a whole new level to their lives. Very well done!
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"Another happy landing."
"I have failed you, Anakin, I have failed you."
~ Obi-Wan
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lazykbys_left
Registered:
Feb '05
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Date Posted:
3/15/05 4:22am
Subject:
RE: Illicit Acts (OCs: a man and a woman and a one-room hostel)
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Every time I see a group with high moral standards, it makes me want to take them down a notch. I'm too chicken to do so in real life, which means I take it out on fictional characters. Luckily, most people don't recognize this as antisocial behavior. 
Thank you for reading!
-----signature-----
"You're like some kind of link machine." - rhonderoo It didn't stop being magic just because you found out how it was done. DARK SIDE FHTAGN lazykbys fanfic index (click and scroll dowwwn): http://boards.theforce.net/m/b1/17609715/r17736763
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Indra
Registered:
Dec '03
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Date Posted:
3/15/05 5:08am
Subject:
RE: Illicit Acts (OCs: a man and a woman and a one-room hostel)
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I like this very much. The atmosphere you created fit the scene perfectly and both characters are very well-drawn. You portrayed both their needs that they fulfill time and again despite knowing that it is somehow wrong extremely well or maybe they just think it's wrong because society has told them so. But in reality all they want is a bit of relieve from their normal lives. Very well done.
-----signature-----
I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by. - Douglas Adams Picking Every Blade of Truth http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/23113954/p1/?1 - collaboration with VaderLVR
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Kynstar
Registered:
Mar '04
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Date Posted:
3/15/05 5:18am
Subject:
RE: Illicit Acts (OCs: a man and a woman and a one-room hostel)
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I too enjoyed this! Glad to see that it didn't go there  He needed a reprieve and it seems she is the only one that can do it for him. The Force can do a lot of things - good or bad. Thanks for sharing this! It was great! Loved the descriptions and characterizations.
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Paddy sis to t_s & SarkaVrae/Master to hyperspace_police
Member of Rebel Legion and Jedi Assembly (Kynstar Lans)
Long live fanfiction...for in these tales do our heroes still exist.
See stories/viggies in bio
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lazykbys_left
Registered:
Feb '05
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Date Posted:
3/17/05 5:58am
Subject:
RE: Illicit Acts (OCs: a man and a woman and a one-room hostel)
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Indra:
I like this very much. The atmosphere you created fit the scene perfectly and both characters are very well-drawn. You portrayed both their needs that they fulfill time and again despite knowing that it is somehow wrong extremely well or maybe they just think it's wrong because society has told them so. But in reality all they want is a bit of relieve from their normal lives. Very well done.
Thank you! For her, it's one of those weird feedback loops where you realize what you did is wrong, but you don't want to get punished for it so you do another thing that's wrong, and so on. Her weakness feeds his weakness, which in turn fuels her weakness.
Kynstar:
I too enjoyed this! Glad to see that it didn't go there He needed a reprieve and it seems she is the only one that can do it for him. The Force can do a lot of things - good or bad. Thanks for sharing this! It was great! Loved the descriptions and characterizations.
The thing is, he knows she can provide relief whereas he's not sure about everyone else and he'd need to work at articulating his feelings to them. I agree that the Force can do a lot of good and bad things. I also think that sometimes they can be the same thing [obi] from different points of view [/obi].
Thank you for reading!
-----signature-----
"You're like some kind of link machine." - rhonderoo It didn't stop being magic just because you found out how it was done. DARK SIDE FHTAGN lazykbys fanfic index (click and scroll dowwwn): http://boards.theforce.net/m/b1/17609715/r17736763
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