It's the ones who slowly get you to trust them, kind of, and then gradually build up your tolerance for more and more creepy behavior that become the stalkers from hell. Been there, done that, sadly, although I wasn't a target of the individual some people here have been discussing. Just in case we've got some people out there who think they have no right to complain until somebody's sending them 4-letter words and threatening to come to their houses, I'll point out some "little" things that you have every right to complain about: 1) One-sided conversations in which the other person asks or demands a lot of information about you, but never says much about himself. Real friendship is reciprocal--people exchange information; they don't interrogate each other. The attention can seem flattering at first, but if you give away too much info about yourself, you could find yourself faced with an obsessed guy who can find you any time he wants, whether you want him to or not. 2) Somebody who always wants to know where you're going, where you've been, or demands an explanation if you can't talk to him. Unless you're under 18 and it's your mom asking, the other person has no right even to ask. 3) Somebody who continually tries to nag/beg/flatter you into doing something you've already said you don't want to do. Even if they're charming and funny about it, and you wonder if it might be a joke, you don't have to listen to someone continually asking for your phone number, or n00dz, or to describe what you're wearing, or anything else. If the guy really is charming and harmless, he'll stop asking the first time you say "No." 4) Somebody who's sweet and fun until you give him an answer he doesn't want to hear--then he turns ugly. Just because you said or did something that made him mad does not mean you owe him anything. A genuine friend can accept "No, I don't like/want that" without feeling the need to punish you with accusations or insulting little jabs over PM or on the boards. 5) Basically, anything that makes you feel like a first grader whose 5th grade "friend" is "asking" for your lunch money. Exploitation can be done with a smile, and one of the easiest ways to keep using people is to be nice to them in between taking stuff from them. This is not friendship, no matter how fun the other person is when he's not after you for something.
JadeSolo posted:ophelia's original post actually had a note like that at the bottom (she's as thorough as they come ). I added a line near the top - does that help?
Rigil_Kent posted:I must admit to being mildly disturbed that such a policy is even necessary ... but this is the internet after all.
