Jedi Council Forums - The Legend of Black Saber (2nd Anniversary Repost) Updated 7/1

Locked Topic | Read Only Topic | Previous Active Topic | Next Active Topic

Author	Topic: The Legend of Black Saber (2nd Anniversary Repost) Updated 7/1
the_wandering_shadow Registered: May '05	Date Posted: 5/17/05 4:39am Subject: The Legend of Black Saber (2nd Anniversary Repost) Updated 7/1 - Date Edited: 7/1/05 2:58am (11 edits total) Edited By: the_wandering_shadow
	Two years and two days ago, I--as tatooinewizard--embarked on a great adventure, posting my first fan fic on theforce.net, The Legend of Black Saber , which I had spent months writing and editing. The initial run was great, for me anyway I must say, I met new friends, whom I now sorely miss after having been away on such a long hiatus, and I got some much desired feedback. Later I even managed to have this story win 'Best OC Story' in the 2003 Original Character awards. I've dug up the old story now to give some new people the chance to read something they probably didn't know was buried here. If some old friends want to reaquaint themselves with the piece, I won't argue the point And so I once again give you The Legend of Black Saber ... But one more thing... DISCLAIMER: George Lucas is the Emperor of Star Wars. Need I say more? ___________________________ I A cold fire blazed throughout Cloudia Wandry’s tense body as she jerked awake and quickly fought to sit up in bed, and she rubbed her eyes with her clammy hands, forcing herself to see in the darkness. She looked to her right and saw the bulky outline of the trunk, which contained her meager belongings, and the archaic computer control panel that was flashing slightly. Seeing those things, she knew where she was: her room on Valenteen’s base on Trangor L’sa. She sighed, rubbing her forehead, and then her black hair, with her trembling palm, and she knew she should have felt relieved, but she didn’t. Her heart still pounded, and she couldn’t help but shiver a few times. The coldness inside of her was only beginning to wear off, and suddenly Cloudia thought of the one thing that might comfort her. She twisted out of the sheets without haste and silently walked to her trunk; it was an antique piece of furniture, from the Vega system, and it had a quite modern, computerized locking mechanism. The young woman didn’t know why she was obsessive about keeping the trunk locked. Who would want to steal from me anyway? she thought, but then she reminded herself, the galaxy is full of fools. She hit the third of five buttons, a mesh of numbers and letters scrolling onto the small screen below. Then she typed her sprawling code from memory, and when she finished she heard the slightly hissed ‘chhhh’ sound of the lock giving. Then she opened the trunk and reached to the bottom left side. After a moment her hand brushed against the familiar feeling, sleek metal object, and even more quickly, it was within her grasp and out of the trunk. Then Cloudia slid the tip of her thumb along the handle until she tapped the slightly raised button, and the lightsaber came to life. The blade was black, and as she tilted it vertically, the distorted light worked its hardest to cast an ominous look into her somber, thoughtful features. Perhaps if she had been completely human she wouldn’t have looked so threatening, but her late mother had been a Churyen. So the young woman had a somewhat gold tint to her skin. She had a trio of crescent-shaped bonelines curving from her eyes to her cheeks; her eyes themselves were a deep, thick purplish color, and her lips looked bruised with a similar hue. The half-Churyen kept her stare focused on the lightsaber and knew that most wouldn’t have wanted to be saddled with this odd brand of the familiar Jedi weapon. It had the appearance of a tool that would likely be used by those interested in the Dark Side of the Force. But this object had belonged to her now deceased father Corryn Wandry. He had been a Jedi Master, and though he had left the Order, he had not done so for any dark reasons like some of the others before him. Well, Cloudia didn’t honestly know why he had turned his back on the Jedi, but she had known her father as a kind, loving man, someone who would never have been seduced by the Dark Side. As she stood there, thinking and continuing to stare at her most sacred possession, the door to her room opened. She shuddered, unable to suppress a gasp as she forced her lightsaber’s blade to flicker into oblivion. Yet she immediately called the weapon to attention again. She would not be caught with her guard down. Then she saw who it was and sighed. “Erik,” she whispered. Erik, Valenteen’s younger brother, stepped into the room. He was a tall man, about thirty standard years old. He had short dark hair, and though he also was very efficient looking in his crisp, blue uniform, concern was evident in his semi-handsome features. “Yeah,” he said, relating to Cloudia’s recognition, but then he asked, “Is anything wrong?” “No. Everything’s fine… really.” Erik squinted at the blazing lightsaber and furrowed his brow. “You sure?” Cloudia nodded, and to reveal her honesty, she shut down her weapon and allowed the overhead light to flicker on. “I’m perfectly fine,” she reassured quietly, but she didn’t look at him until she asked, “Why are you here anyway?” “Just had a feeling, you know how that works.” “I do…” Cloudia responded, not having to force the smile that suddenly appeared on her face. “With all these feelings you get, you might very well have Jedi potential in you.” “Well, maybe, but you know that sort of thing doesn’t really matter to me. I’ve got other things to worry about.” Then Erik shifted the subject. “Now I want to know, why did you have your lightsaber out if there wasn’t anything wrong?” The young woman’s smile was a memory, and she gazed downward. “I dreamt about my father’s death again.” “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t know… So much for having Jedi potential.” Cloudia sat down on the edge of her bed. “It’s okay, really. In fact I’m glad you’re here. I want to talk about it… I feel cold and isolated every time I have one of those dreams. It’s… it’s more awful than anyone can imagine. I mean I lived through it once, but it doesn’t seem like that was enough.” The half-Churyen forced her voice to become hollow as she fought back tears. For the first time in her life she was going to relay the images that had haunted her endlessly, even though she thought that doing so was the weakest move she could make. Even though Erik one of the most trustworthy people she had ever known, she had not wanted to expose this very personal part of herself. But now that the pain was so fresh, she knew that she couldn’t restrain her thoughts, and she didn’t need to start weeping on top of it. Then, after a quiet, self-bruising pause, she began. “I was there; I watched him die. No, I watched someone kill him, and it’s very lucky that the murderer didn’t come after me too because I think he was aware of me and where I was hiding. “While my father was checking in on me that night, to see if I was sleeping I suppose, he felt someone was coming for him. He quickly woke me up and directed me to the closet on the far side of my bed. I know I would have been sent elsewhere, but his senses hadn’t given him much warning to the intruding presence. I hadn’t even had time to close myself in before the stranger appeared. “I don’t know who the man was, and I can’t recall his facial features, what he was wearing, or anything else about his appearance. But I do know I became extremely frightened the moment he came into view, and even my father who was a brave man took a step backward; he let out a labored breath and, I’m guessing, he whispered the man’s name, ‘Xcelcior…’ “Then the stranger smiled and said, ‘Corryn… You seem to be aware that I have come to collect what you owe me. I hope you’re willing to pay up. It will make things easier on the both of us.’ “My father found his courage, but his entire body tensed as he replied, ‘I owe you nothing.’ “ ‘Ah, but you are severely in my debt, and you know it. You made many promises, and the one that mattered most to me, you failed to keep. You were a fool to deny me. Then, because of you, I lost a very skilled apprentice, and there was no one to take his place.’ “ ‘I did nothing to Severin Trundle,’ my father interrupted, but the man countered quickly. “ ‘You stirred within him the desire to betray me. I cannot forgive you for that, nor can I forgive the fact that you betrayed me yourself.’ “Father shook his head boldly and said, ‘I merely came to my senses.’ “The stranger tilted his head back and gave a sinister, disbelieving laugh. Then the room became silent. I could only hear the constant pounding of my heart as I saw my father’s gaze shifting around. I believe he was looking for this…” Cloudia pointed the lightsaber’s handle in Erik’s direction to indicate what she was talking about. Then she released a great sigh and continued. “But Father couldn’t find it, and there was an immense amount of satisfaction in the man’s voice as he stated, ‘She’s taken it from you, Corryn.’ “I don’t know why, but I’ve always assumed that he’d been talking about my stepmother Zelda. Of course you know I never really trusted her, but she never gave me any reason to feel like that, so I don’t know. “But the stranger added, ‘So you see you have no defense. I will begin collecting what you owe me.’ “And then it happened. A bright, electric blast filled the room, something like lightning. My father began screaming in pain, and I heard him hit the floor. I was beyond terrified, but there was nothing I could do. I was only seven years old, and I felt bolted to the floor. It seemed like I spent an eternity consumed by that icy brightness, listening to my father wailing, and smelling the rising odor of scorched flesh. “But then the light faded, and so did the screams. I thought for a moment that the vile man was staring at me, trying to peel apart my soul with his black gaze, as if he intended to kill me as he had killed my father. Yet he was abruptly gone, and once I determined that he wasn’t coming back, I got up and went to my father. He was dead, and I fell to his side and wept for a long while. “But that’s it.” During the death scene Cloudia had stopped being able to look at Erik, and even now she couldn’t. She felt somewhat unstable, and the cold that usually came with the dream was upon her, but she sort of felt better. Oddly the tears weren’t as close as they’d been. “It’s no surprise this bothers you like it I does, and I understand why you haven’t wanted to tell anyone before,” Erik stated sympathetically as he walked to where the young woman was sitting. At this advancement Cloudia stood up and took several steps away from him. She still felt she had been rather weak for not striving to contain herself, and she turned her back on him and folded her arms across her chest, denoting that she was independent enough not to need comforting. After a moment, though, she turned around, thinking her behavior rude, and she briefly looked at him and said, “I really appreciate you listening. Thank you.” “No problem. You need anything else right now?” Erik asked. He was evidently still concerned, but he forced himself not to approach her. “No, and besides, you’ve done enough anyway.” “Then I ought to go. My brother’s going to kill me if he finds that I’m not at my post. Sure Grip’s there and she can handle a lot, but you know Urius.” Cloudia had been a part of the organization for ten years now, and she was well aware that Urius Valenteen knew how to run things and that he didn’t like when his orders, even the small ones, were defied. Especially if his little brother was the one being defiant. Erik was about to turn and leave when he added, “Oh, yeah. I hope you sleep well the rest of the night. We’re going to be leaving pretty early in the morning. That special shipment to Mersigh, you know.” “Thanks for reminding me, Erik,” she said, almost groaning as the unpleasantness of the thought rolled into her. “I really wanted to hear that.” “I’m sorry,” Erik replied, sincerely, yet tiredly, as he noted his mistake. But then he joked, “Must have been my Jedi potential shining through again… Well, I’ve got to run. Suppose I’ll see you in a few hours. Goodnight.” Within a moment he disappeared. The young woman shook her head, nearly depressed now, as she went to return her father’s lightsaber to its resting place. But she couldn’t let it go, and she knew that she shouldn’t ever try to. Being so lax was what had cost Corryn Wandry his life, and Cloudia had to remember that if she didn’t want to end up in the same situation. She closed the trunk and locked it, turned off the overhead light, then got into bed, the lightsaber firmly within her grasp. Yet she couldn’t fall asleep right away. She groaned, unable to stop thinking about having to go to Mersigh again. ‘Force-users’ were hated there, and Joparan of Oxine, the planet’s ruler and chief business executive, would be the one that would show the most prejudice. He always did, but the daughter of the former Jedi Master tried to forget about that. It would still be a few days before she would have to face that ridicule. *** -----signature----- Daniel Paul Harms (1958-2007) Seph Danthar's diary @ http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/29688948/p1/ lordmaul13's partner in crime
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History
the_wandering_shadow Registered: May '05	Date Posted: 5/17/05 2:16pm Subject: RE: The Legend of Black Saber (2nd Anniversary Repost)
	What? No takers? -----signature----- Daniel Paul Harms (1958-2007) Seph Danthar's diary @ http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/29688948/p1/ lordmaul13's partner in crime
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History
Artanis Registered: May '05	Date Posted: 5/17/05 2:56pm Subject: RE: The Legend of Black Saber (2nd Anniversary Repost)
	Very interesting beginning! I'm looking forward to the next part to answer some questions, like who Xcelcior is and if he's going to cause trouble for Cloudia. As a newcomer, I appreciate the opportunity to read some older fics I missed... -----signature----- "What do you want?" "The usual...conversation with a liberal dose of sarcasm."
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History
Spike2002 Title: Former FF-UK RSA and Arena Manager Registered: Feb '02	Date Posted: 5/17/05 3:30pm Subject: RE: The Legend of Black Saber (2nd Anniversary Repost) - Date Edited: 5/17/05 3:31pm (1 edits total) Edited By: Spike2002
	Hey! You're ripping off my old friend tatooinewizard's story! How could you? You heathen! EDIT: Oh I'm sorry, I didn't know... Great disguise tw -----signature----- There's probably no God. Now stop worrying and enjoy your life.
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History
the_wandering_shadow Registered: May '05	Date Posted: 5/17/05 7:05pm Subject: RE: The Legend of Black Saber (2nd Anniversary Repost)
	Artanis Very interesting beginning! Thanks I'm looking forward to the next part to answer some questions, like who Xcelcior is and if he's going to cause trouble for Cloudia. That'll definitely be explained, but this story's a big one so it'll take awhile for everything to be answered. Spike Oh I'm sorry, I didn't know... Great disguise tw And here I was under the impression you were all powerful -----signature----- Daniel Paul Harms (1958-2007) Seph Danthar's diary @ http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/29688948/p1/ lordmaul13's partner in crime
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History
Spike2002 Title: Former FF-UK RSA and Arena Manager Registered: Feb '02	Date Posted: 5/17/05 7:10pm Subject: RE: The Legend of Black Saber (2nd Anniversary Repost)
	Like Yoda and Palpatine before me, I give off the impression of weakness so my enemies underestimate me -----signature----- There's probably no God. Now stop worrying and enjoy your life.
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History
the_wandering_shadow Registered: May '05	Date Posted: 5/17/05 7:12pm Subject: RE: The Legend of Black Saber (2nd Anniversary Repost)
	Ah. That makes sense then. -----signature----- Daniel Paul Harms (1958-2007) Seph Danthar's diary @ http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/29688948/p1/ lordmaul13's partner in crime
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History
the_wandering_shadow Registered: May '05	Date Posted: 5/18/05 6:19pm Subject: RE: The Legend of Black Saber (2nd Anniversary Repost)
	up -----signature----- Daniel Paul Harms (1958-2007) Seph Danthar's diary @ http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/29688948/p1/ lordmaul13's partner in crime
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History
emimar Registered: Apr '03	Date Posted: 5/19/05 7:37am Subject: RE: The Legend of Black Saber (2nd Anniversary Repost) - Date Edited: 5/19/05 7:41am (1 edits total) Edited By: emimar
	Hi. Glad to see that you're back. I'm rewriting Starchaser, at least I will when I get my computer up and running. Gotta say I was having a crap day until I found out that you were back. Will you be finishing those that started writing last time? And how's your orginal writing going? -----signature----- Stories @ force.net's Jedi Council forums here: http://swcc.bravehost.com/index81.html Fan Art Thread http://boards.theforce.net/Fan_Art/b10020/20783536/?0 Web Journal: http://swcc1.bravejournal.com/ Save the Darwin's Zorro - eh fox
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History
the_wandering_shadow Registered: May '05	Date Posted: 5/19/05 8:14am Subject: RE: The Legend of Black Saber (2nd Anniversary Repost) - Date Edited: 5/19/05 8:15am (1 edits total) Edited By: the_wandering_shadow
	Hi, em I'm glad I brightened your day. Will you be finishing those that started writing last time? I suppose eventually. I know I really don't have the time now. Here's why (well let me go find one of the emails I wrote and paste that part here. I don't feel like saying it all again for the millionth time) Of course first I have something to add for this to make more sense before I paste anything... I wrote a play (which is called The Wandering Shadow , and that's where I got my new user name from obviously ) I hoped to have it preformed in my church, and so here's all that's happed concerning it since then. The church Session didn't approve it, but for only one reason. We just don't have space at my church, which I was sort of worried about myself so I completely understood, and I was even urged to find another place to put the play on since I had done a good job and put a lot of effort into it. Anyway, the suggested the high school, and that would have been a good place, but when I contacted the drama director at the school, he said it was unlikely because this summer they'll be tearing the inside up so they can tear it down in the fall. I quickly thought of another option, Saint Mary's has this big hall, with a stage, for receptions and other things like that, so I contacted them, and it took quite awhile of going back and forth to figure out all the details. To make it short, the catholics want $300 up front for the two nights I picked to have it preformed. They want this because I'll be using the hall to make money, even though I stated that all the proceeds would be going to charities. At first I thought I'd luck out and they'd at least take it out of the money that came in, but no they want it up front. My friend Mike and I have been joking that Catholics are like toydarians, mind tricks don't work on them, only money Luckily my cousin Gail is the music director of a school one county over, the school I graduated from as a matter of fact. The school has yearly musicals, and I think Gail has done four so far. Anyway, the way she raises money for her productions is she goes around to local businesses and asks for sponsorship. So I'm taking up that idea. I haven't really been able to get going yet though, which is frustrating. Last Friday I wound up running into the reverend and also the secretary of my church. They seemed eager to help. They're going to back me, and make me look official so when I go into businesses it doesn't seem like I'm possibly trying to scam them. That's a logical point that I hadn't thought of. Plus with being church-backed all business owners that contribute will receive a deduction when it comes time for them to file their taxes. Hopefully that'll help. There's one hold up, and that's because of Mrs. Wilcom, the church secretary who said that she was going to help me. First she said we were going to get together on Tuesday, she'd bring this special softwear to the office and we'd get everything figured out. I get there on Tuesday and she says she forgot, but she'll have everything ready for me to pick up the next day. Well, that didn't happen, so she says everything will be ready today. I sure hope so, tryouts are on the sixteen and I have so much that I've got to do, all by myself, not that I'm complaning. I'd just like to get on with it, the whole money issue is making me nervous. I've got to finish my flyers, and contact the local paper, finish editing the play itself, because of all that's going on I can hardly concentrate to do much editing at all. Then there's the worry if not enough actors come to the tryouts. I need 26 people, so of course I really need to start getting the word out. If hardly anyone comes, then all my work will have been for nothing. It's all frustrating so I pray it all comes together. And I also hope I can see Episode III soon, that would really lift my spirits. And how's your orginal writing going? Well. Mostly I'm just working on editing the play now, I also have a short story called Ritual that I sent to a magazine called Weird Tales , that was in late March, still haven't heard back. Hopefully I will soon. Other than that, I have some ideas that I'll probably start working on once I get the play's final edit done. _____ Note to self: Probably should update this today, regardless. ______ goes off The Imperial March* , in an extremely out of tune fashion because IT's MARCH 19TH ! Happy ROTS everyone -----signature----- Daniel Paul Harms (1958-2007) Seph Danthar's diary @ http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/29688948/p1/ lordmaul13's partner in crime
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History
the_wandering_shadow Registered: May '05	Date Posted: 5/22/05 6:52pm Subject: RE: The Legend of Black Saber (2nd Anniversary Repost)
	Next scene up... Trangor L’sa’s sun had just begun to transcend the horizon when Cloudia headed for the main hangar, which was home to more than a dozen of the ships in the famous Death Fleet, including Valenteen’s personal favorite, the Death’s Vein. Of course the fleet itself was really more sinister in title than in fact. The man that had long ago founded the organization had reputedly been somewhat macabre, if not mad as well. Cloudia navigated the base’s corridors with routine ease. She was dressed in a blue uniform, for all of Valenteen’s main people wore the like to denote their status. Yet each member of the elite had a different style. While Erik’s look gave him a more professional edge, Cloudia appeared warrior-like. Her lightsaber hung from the left side of her black belt—the weapon resting snugly at the thigh portion her form-fitting pants—and she wore her hair free. No one seemed to notice the young woman as she entered the hangar, but she hadn’t thought they would. Through the Force she had been able to feel the tension within way before entering, though there shouldn’t have been any ill ease at all, and even if she hadn’t been Force sensitive, the racket going on would have tipped her off. “You won’t see my daughter until I receive the king’s reverse dowry! Do you hear me! I will not be conned by the likes of you or anyone else in this sleazy operation!” The woman yelling was a local widow named Daria Graysky. She was gaunt, perpetually stern looking, and her hair was a mass of tight red curls. Cloudia had only seen the woman in worn, faded garments before this, but now Widow Graysky was dressed as if she were nearly royalty herself. She was wearing a dazzling emerald-colored gown, the material looked as fine as handspun silkweed, and her neck and work-coarse fingers were adorned with the finest Corellian gems. Apparently the woman felt like talking as if she were royalty as well, although Cloudia discerned that a mixture of greed and worry might have bred this show. Widow Graysky, in wanting to rise above her station, had decided to sell her sixteen-year-old daughter when she’d heard that Mersigh’s sovereign desired to have a human bride. It was known that she had sold all her possessions, even her house and the fertile land it sat on, because she knew that Joparan of Oxine would be paying well for the girl, but why hadn’t she received payment? Cloudia had seen the king give Valenteen the Mersighdonian credits; that had been a few weeks ago. “Look, don’t talk to me like that. You should have what you’re owed. It’s not my fault you don’t.” Grip Tarlen responded, stroking her blaster, clearly wanting to use it on the widow. Grip, despite only being a year or so older than Cloudia, was one of Valenteen’s greatest assets. She was quite intelligent, exquisitely attractive, and absolute hell with a blaster. She wore the jacket of her uniform open, so a low-cut, sleeveless blouse was all that covered her chest, and she almost always had her weapon drawn. So she was quite warrior-like herself. Yet she had a certain spark that made her desirable to nearly all the men who saw her, and she wasn’t so tough as to ignore all of that attention, though she was very selective. “I’ll talk to you any way I like! I want what I’m owed, and if I don’t get it, the king won’t have his human bride!” Daria Graysky declared as Cloudia made her way toward the bickering women, and as the widow spotted the half-Churyen, she turned and barked, “You! Get me Urius Valenteen! I want to see him now!” But before Cloudia could do as she’d been instructed, Valenteen came in, looking as charming as ever in his elite black uniform. “Widow Graysky. Is there a problem?” Valenteen was very sharp looking, ten years older than Erik, and he was decidedly more sly in appearance than his brother. His hair was a sleek expanse of black waves, though he was graying near the temples now, and his beard was as well groomed as a gentleman’s. The widow was far from impressed. “Yes, and you should know what that problem is.” “I’m afraid I don’t. Please fill me in.” Valenteen was attempting to keep his niceties in tact. Yet the widow thought the move to be an insult, and she grunted before saying, “Either that Joparan of Oxine is a liar, or you’ve decided to keep his credits to yourself.” “Are you speaking of the reverse dowry?” the organization’s leader said kindly. “As if you didn’t know.” “Really, Widow Graysky. I’m doing my utmost best to accommodate you, I assure you, and I don’t honestly appreciate being treated as if I’m a common smuggler.” “But that’s what you are, isn’t it?” “You are mistaken if you believe that,” Valenteen said, his calm not wavering in the least as he flexed his self-restraint. “My organization is completely legit.” Well, all the members knew that things sometimes straddled the border of legality, but basically the commander was being honest. “Then where’s what I’m owed?” “I entrusted the reverse dowry to my Mersighdonian aide, Marzan Rensor. It was his duty to deliver it you, at the very least a week ago. But he can be very forgetful. This matter will be sorted out shortly.” “I’m sure,” the widow quipped. Valenteen turned to his favorite, if not best, lieutenant and asked, “Grip, have you seen Rensor this morning?” She shook her head, and he quickly scanned the hangar. He saw Erik, and a scrawny, fifteen-year-old boy named Jake Elvne, who was also privileged enough to wear one of the blue uniforms. Jake was good at fixing things, but the only reason he was here was because he was an orphaned cousin of Valenteen’s. Still most everybody knew that the boy was special and had a lot of talent. “Erik! Jake! Have either of you seen Rensor? It’s imperative that I speak to him!” A negative from both and Valenteen turned to Cloudia. “Wandry, go find Rensor. Do what needs to be done.” The young woman gave a stiff nod and left the hangar. The Mersighdonian would be in his room, she knew, counting the silver credits and dwelling on his new fortune before making a run for it. She could feel that Rensor was still here. He probably thought that he had some time, and he would have had just that if Widow Graysky hadn’t been so apt to reveal her own greedy anger. Cloudia entered the sleeping quarters and was quickly at Rensor’s room. What was terribly amusing was that he was just exiting the place, and he had a large, bulging sack slung over his shoulder. The Mersighdonian was much like others of his species. His skin was very red, as if he’d spent too long in the sun—odd because Mersigh had no sun; its energy was extracted from the planet’s core—and thick black veins screamed through the redness, coming together in an odd, grid-like pattern. But what made him slightly different from his kindred was that he was only average human height. Other Mersighdonian males were at least thirty centimeters taller. Rensor gave a slight gasp and shoved his tendril looking fingers through his messy black hair. He stopped that immediately, and took to smoothing his hand over the chest portion of his loose-fitting blue uniform. Cloudia wondered why Valenteen had marked this man one of the elite. Perhaps it was because Rensor was supposed to be a mediator, someone interested in trying to preserve the organization’s long existing business relationship with the Mersighdonians, but it was clear that Marzan Rensor had more selfish concerns at heart. “What… are you doing here?” the Mersighdonian said, fighting his urge to stutter. “Looking for you. Valenteen sent me.” Cloudia’s tone sent an irrepressible shiver down Rensor’s spine. “Oh… well, I know I should have been at the hangar by now, but I decided that there were a few…ah, extra things I needed… for the journey.” “I see.” The Mersighdonian nodded to proclaim himself truthful, but the half-Churyen’s stern expression didn’t flinch. “But apparently our journey’s going to be delayed. Perhaps it won’t even happen at all.” Rensor gulped. “Why?” he asked, his voice becoming shrill. “His Regality needs the girl by the fifth day of the festival, and we must leave shortly if we are to deliver his property on time.” The young woman made no response, merely waiting for him to hang himself. “You all know how His Regality is concerning Mersighdonian ritual. He might… he will chose a different organization if we do not arrive on specification.” After an apprehensive silence Cloudia said, “Yes, that’s clear, but it seems there’s been a slight problem concerning the reverse dowry. Daria Graysky hasn’t received it.” The Mersighdonian tried to look confused and perhaps appalled. “Valenteen told us that you were the one responsible for crediting the widow.” Now he did look appalled. “What? Are you accusing me of stealing it?” Rensor’s voice ascended in pitch once more. “Not yet, at least. Where is it, Rensor?” “I… I don’t have it. It was stolen from me.” The Mersighdonian spat, but then he thought his defensiveness a mistake. He shifted his gaze toward the floor. “I was ashamed to admit my carelessness, and I still am. Take me before Valenteen and allow me to admit my foolishness.” Rensor was not a good liar. “Nice try. Tell me the truth.” He looked up in frustration, his bleak eyes burning as he declared, “I already told you!” Apparently it was time to take things up a notch. Cloudia allowed the Force to flow through her, and she reached for the Mersighdonian’s mind; this was what Valenteen had meant when he had told her to do what needed to be done. She waved her hand before Rensor’s eyes. “You will tell me where the reverse dowry is,” she stated calmly. And the weak-minded creature echoed, “I will tell you where the reverse dowry is,” before adding, “It’s in this sack.” Cloudia waved her hand again. “You will show it to me and let me have it.” “I will show it to you… and let you have it.” Rensor set his sack on the floor and opened it. He rummaged through his clothes and other belongings before extracting a heavy, gray purse. He opened that as well, revealing that the entire reverse dowry was still inside, then he handed the purse to Cloudia. The young woman released her hold over him, and he sent her a stinging glare. “I hate you,” the Mersighdonian rumbled. “All of your people hate me.” “Well, I hate you more than they do. I did even before all this, but now look what you’ve done to me. The tyrant could have paid that tidy sum again and again, and he wouldn’t be any worse off. You don’t know how much he has and how little everybody else does even with our help.” Cloudia had more than a general idea, and she also knew that, because Rensor worked for Valenteen, he was better off than most of the common people of Mersigh. “And now because of you I’m going to get kicked out of the organization.” “Maybe not,” she said, and he gave her a distrustful glare. She didn’t want to help him out, being that he’d proven himself a thief. Yet this was his only offense of such magnitude, and she felt compelled to spare him. “Look, I’ll tell Valenteen that you just forgot to give it to the widow. He’s already told her that that’s probably what happened.” “Why do you want to help me out? Do you think it’ll sway my feelings for you?” Cloudia shook her head. “You’ll still hate me. I’m just trying to do you a favor.” “Really? Well, if you honestly wanted to do me a favor, you’d give me the blasted credits and let me get out of here. Sure I acted like I cared about the tyrant’s feelings, but I don’t. And I don’t care what happens to this putrid operation either.” She knew she should have revoked her kindness then and there, but she couldn’t. Maybe once this most recent business with Joparan of Oxine was finished she would talk to Valenteen about getting a new Mersighdonian aide. “Quit complaining and come on. We’ve got a job to do whether you like it or not.” The statement seemed to magnify the evident hatred in Rensor’s eyes, but he quietly complied, knowing that she could force him to do so if he didn’t. *** -----signature----- Daniel Paul Harms (1958-2007) Seph Danthar's diary @ http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/29688948/p1/ lordmaul13's partner in crime
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History
emimar Registered: Apr '03	Date Posted: 5/23/05 7:33am Subject: RE: The Legend of Black Saber (2nd Anniversary Repost) Updated 5/22
	I've been thinking that maybe we should revive the old Original Character Alliance thread... You aren't the only one whose noticed a lack of interest in your story. I don't know if it's just me, but there seems to be a lack of community on the boards right now and it seems to be around at every forum I go and it seems to be difficult to make friends as well - it's kinda of like I'll post my story and leave kinda thing. Before you came back I was seriously going to consider finishing the stories I've started just incase anyone's reading them and don't come back anymore. -----signature----- Stories @ force.net's Jedi Council forums here: http://swcc.bravehost.com/index81.html Fan Art Thread http://boards.theforce.net/Fan_Art/b10020/20783536/?0 Web Journal: http://swcc1.bravejournal.com/ Save the Darwin's Zorro - eh fox
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History
amidalachick Registered: Aug '03	Date Posted: 5/23/05 12:04pm Subject: RE: The Legend of Black Saber (2nd Anniversary Repost) Updated 5/22
	Very cool story so far! I like Cloudia. I'll be keeping an eye on this one. -----signature----- "Special day? What have I forgot now? Don't panic...is it Bacon Day? No, that's crazy talk! She's getting impatient - take a stab at it! Happy...Valentine's Day?"
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History
the_wandering_shadow Registered: May '05	Date Posted: 5/26/05 10:25am Subject: RE: The Legend of Black Saber (2nd Anniversary Repost) Updated 5/22 - Date Edited: 5/26/05 5:25pm (1 edits total) Edited By: the_wandering_shadow
	em I've been thinking that maybe we should revive the old Original Character Alliance thread... That's a pretty good idea. You aren't the only one whose noticed a lack of interest in your story. I don't know if it's just me, but there seems to be a lack of community on the boards right now At least in my case, it seems so. A lot different than two years ago. . Before you came back I was seriously going to consider finishing the stories I've started just incase anyone's reading them and don't come back anymore. amidalachick Very cool story so far! I like Cloudia. I'll be keeping an eye on this one. Thanks a lot I'll probably be updating later today or tomorrow. -----signature----- Daniel Paul Harms (1958-2007) Seph Danthar's diary @ http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/29688948/p1/ lordmaul13's partner in crime
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History
Artanis Registered: May '05	Date Posted: 5/26/05 11:57am Subject: RE: The Legend of Black Saber (2nd Anniversary Repost) Updated 5/22
	Just thought I'd let you know I'm still here and reading. I'm particularly interested in Cloudia's background - and of course, what's going to happen with the widow and the reverse dowry. -----signature----- "What do you want?" "The usual...conversation with a liberal dose of sarcasm."
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History
the_wandering_shadow Registered: May '05	Date Posted: 5/26/05 5:35pm Subject: RE: The Legend of Black Saber (2nd Anniversary Repost) Updated 5/22
	Just thought I'd let you know I'm still here and reading. Thanks, Artanis I'm particularly interested in Cloudia's background - The update after this one you'll learn how Cloudia became a part of Valenteen's organization. That's one puzzle piece. and of course, what's going to happen with the widow and the reverse dowry. You'll find that out very quickly. Also I'm sure you'll find that you really don't like Joparan of Oxine. No one does, and for good reason. ____________________ Widow Graysky’s mood improved tenfold once the reverse dowry was in her hands, and she was quickly out of sight to fetch her daughter. Valenteen didn’t quite believe that Rensor had merely undergone a bout memory loss, but since Wandry had not condemned the aide, the commander took to other tasks as he waited for the most important piece of ‘cargo’ to arrive. He was finishing the Death’s Vein’s final inspection with Erik and Jake when Grip boarded. “Is anything wrong?” Valenteen asked her. “No, but Joparan of Oxine is calling. He wants to talk to you, and probably the girl, too.” Grip responded. “And is Olivia Graysky here?” “Not yet, but the widow’s got no reason to keep the girl any longer than necessary. Just keep the king busy for a few minutes if you can, and either Cloudia or I can go see if they’re on the way.” “You stay here. Help Erik and Jake finish. I’ll send Wandry out on my way to the holo-link.” And Valenteen was off, first giving Wandry her orders, then making his way to where the sovereign was waiting. He hoped that the widow hadn’t found another reason to keep her daughter. Perhaps the woman would try to seek more money before submitting to release the girl. Daria Graysky was one of the greediest women he’d ever encountered, and he was not going to be pleased if her avarice cost him. He stepped on the transmitter pad and bowed slightly before the Mersighdonian ruler’s hologram. “Your Regality, it is pleasant to hear from you. Can I be of service?” Valenteen said. Joparan of Oxine smiled. He was a towering presence in many ways. He was physically tall like most others of his race, and he had a shine of omnipotence about him, which never seemed to dull. His sleek, crimson garments added to his grandeur. “Perhaps, Shen Valenteen, perhaps, but first I would like to know how things are proceeding on your base. I should hope they are going well enough that you can leave after this transmission. I will not endure tardiness on this occasion.” “Things are going well, Your Regality… Splendidly in fact. We’re ready to leave this very moment.” The king’s smile widened, for he hadn’t detected the lie. “Good, good. As it should be then. I will leave you now, and we will see each other in a few days time…” Valenteen was about to turn the holo-link off when the sovereign said, “But wait. I should like to see my new acquisition first.” “Yes, Your Regality. Immediately.” Valenteen was very nervous, but he was good at hiding his feelings. He turned from the king’s image, and he sighed internally as he saw Wandry bringing the girl toward him. Olivia Graysky was dressed in a covering, white gown made entirely of Mersighdonian trevvy-lace. She also wore a silken veil that covered her entire face and was made of such an odd material that she could see out, but none could see in. When the two reached the holo-link, Valenteen instructed the girl to kneel right where he had been standing. “Ah, thank you, Shen Valenteen,” the king said, his sharp, glittering teeth were very evident. Then he began to address the girl. “Female, I want to see your face.” Olivia removed the veil, and her beauty was made clear. Her blonde hair shone, and her sapphire eyes sparkled. “Ah, Shen Valenteen has done very well, I would say… Female, speak to me.” The girl said something she had been told to recite. “I am your slave, my Regality, bound in the bliss of your mighty chains. I have no thoughts save yours, and I worship your perfection as I must, for I womanly weak.” “Continue…” Joparan of Oxine mused with ecstasy, and his new purchase obeyed. * All of it was making Cloudia ill, and she was glad when the king’s image vanished. Of course she didn’t feel too much better considering that she would soon be seeing him in person, but she tried to remind herself that it was only going to be for a few days. By the time the Mersighdonian harvest festival concluded, they’d be back on Trangor L’sa, getting ready to make delivery elsewhere. Well, at least she hoped so. Something didn’t seem right, but the feeling was so insignificant and elusive that she wouldn’t dare mention it. The half-Churyen helped Olivia Graysky to her feet and led the girl to her mother and younger brother Matty. Amid the bustle and ongoing chatter, the bride-to-be said her final good-byes. The widow looked rather detached from the situation. “I hope you don’t do anything to disgrace me,” the woman told her daughter. Cloudia took the words to mean, don’t do anything that will make me have to get rid of the money. Surely there must have been some other emotion under the callousness, but it was buried too deep to be noticeable. “I won’t, Mother,” the girl said with more respect than Cloudia would have. Matty Graysky, who was dressed in a plain, ash-colored suit, was obviously very saddened, although he tried his best to hide his feelings as he bid his sister farewell. Still the boy could not restrain himself from asking, “Am I ever going to see you again?” “Of course. Maybe not that soon, but you will see me again. I promise you.” Olivia believed her words, but the chances were she was never going to be able to see her brother, or anyone else she’d known in childhood, again. She was too naïve to know what type of shattering changes were going to take place once she reached Mersigh. “Okay,” the boy said, nodding as he tried to keep his emotions from overwhelming him. He did relatively well, even when he and his sister hugged for the final time. Olivia also tried to embrace her mother, but the woman would not allow it. The girl felt disheartened, but she didn’t have time to dwell on her mother’s distance. Valenteen appeared and asked, “Has everything been taken care of here?” “Yes,” Cloudia responded, and the widow gave a curt nod. “Good…” the commander said. He turned and spotted Grip by the Death’s Vein, and he called to her. “Is the inspection done, and is the other cargo aboard?” “Yes. We’re ready to go,” Grip told him, then she disappeared into the vessel. Valenteen gave a satisfied nod to no one in particular. “Wandry, take Miss Graysky aboard.” And as Cloudia and the girl went toward the ship, Matty waved his final goodbye, and his mother pulled him from the hangar. Before the commander himself walked to the Death’s Vein, he stopped by another of his ships; one of his favorites, and the deadliest in the fleet. It was called the Corellian Death Ray, and it was a very mean spacecraft. There were very few non-military vessels in the galaxy that could even match it, let alone tear it to shreds in a power contest. “Riggs,” Valenteen called to the Death Ray’s pilot, and the eager young man, who was dressed in a green uniform, stopped the outer-inspection of the weaponry. “Sir?” Elian Riggs asked. “As you know, you’ll be following the Death’s Vein this trip, but I warn you, don’t look like you’re following us. We don’t want any Mersighdonian agents to think that we’ve lost our trust for them. Not that we have, but I assume I’m making myself clear.” “Yes, sir.” “Good. You’ll land on the Trevesa moon and stay there, either until we leave Mersigh or if we need assistance beforehand. And if we need your help we’ll be using the Delta Security Code. Is all of this understood, Riggs?” “Yes, sir.” Valenteen nodded to the pilot and pressed onward to the Death’s Vein. * The three-day trip to Mersigh was uneventful, and while that was something to be appreciative of, Cloudia was solemn and lost in thought most of the time. Mainly she was reliving a prior experience on Mersigh, the one where she had learned of the people’s ultimate contempt for ‘Force-uses’, and though the incident had happened almost four years ago, it felt like it had happened yesterday. Drendis Landstraa, Valenteen’s previous Mersighdonian aide, had been relieved of his duties and his life because Joparan of Oxine had caught the man sneaking inexpensive, off-world goods to the working class people; in the sovereign’s eyes this was treason. And so the king chose a relatively unknown man named Marzan Rensor to take Landstraa’s place. When Valenteen and his elite arrived to accept Rensor into the fold, many working-class youths decided to assassinate the king for executing Landstraa. They ended up killing and wounding a good many of Joparan of Oxine’s loyal protectors, and it was later learned that some of the other guards had been bribed to do nothing in the face of the vengeful act. Grip revealed her concealed blaster and used it, taking out a few assassins, but in the end it had been Cloudia that had saved the ruler’s life. It was her first instinct to use the Force, and she sent the remaining youths flying backward. This display left many of them huddled in terror, but one juvenile was so angry that he could not note what Cloudia had done. He lunged toward her, preparing to damage her for aiding the sovereign, and he would have, but without thinking the daughter of the former Jedi Master rose her hand and began to slowly squeeze her thumb and closest finger together. The wrathful Mersighdonian suddenly couldn’t breathe. In a futile gesture he clawed at his throat, and within a few moments he could hardly stand. Another of the disgruntled young ones left his fear behind and blasted at Cloudia. She stopped choking the first one, and using the Force, her concealed lightsaber slid into her grasp and she ignited it. None would move toward her now. The king was fearful himself, but he tried to maintain his regal calmness as he turned to one of his remaining loyal guards. “Take these hoodlums into custody, and also arrest the guards who did not return fire in my defense.” “Yes, Your Regality,” the addressee responded with military-like nod. Then Joparan of Oxine pointed above to the looming probe droids, which had recorded the entire incident. “And when you’re through, dissect these probes and transmit the visual data to the proper authority.” “As you wish,” the guard said and took to his duty. “And you,” the Mersighdonian ruler said to another of his loyalists. “See that the wounded are taken to the medical care ward and that the dead are cleared from the street as well. Then alert all the families to this tragedy.” The sovereign was obeyed, and soon all that remained with him were Valenteen and the elite. By this time the king’s look of disdain had returned and he glared at Valenteen and snidely remarked, “How dare you, Shen Valenteen. Why have you brought this Jedi Knight before me?” “Wandry is not a Jedi, Your Regality,” the organization’s leader stated. “Then what is she, using this vile magic?” “She must have a sensitivity for the Force, but until this moment I was unaware of it.” All this had shocked Cloudia, but she was wounded to find Valenteen lying. He had known about her affinity concerning the Force all along, but he was trying to save his skin. He didn’t want to lose his contract or risk execution. “Whether or not that is the case you will not bring this Force-user before me again. I will not stand face-to-face with such vileness.” “I beg you to reconsider that thought, Your Regality. She is a great… asset to me.” Cloudia knew what type of asset he meant, even though it was not true. She had never been Valenteen’s lover, but the king didn’t know that. And furthermore Joparan of Oxine could relate to the young woman being such an asset; he, himself, had been attracted to her feminine beauty before she had revealed her Force powers. “I do not desire to be without her… I’m sure you understand,” Valenteen concluded his thought. “Yes… yes… Very well, you’ve swayed me, but I will not endure this Force-user practicing her grotesque magic before me… ever again.” “I fully understand, Your Regality. She will obey that mandate,” Valenteen had assured the sovereign. And then Cloudia came out of the memory for the final time. Mersigh was now in view, and Erik was receiving landing clearance. As the young woman looked on at the greenish landmasses and azure seas, which lay underneath the golden blanket that was the solar dome, she felt as if someone’s fist had pounded into her forehead. She jerked reflexively and lay her hands over her face. “Are you all right, Cloudia?” Grip asked from a few seats over. The daughter of the former Jedi Master removed her hands and looked around. Everybody aside from Rensor was looking at her with concern in their eyes. “I don’t know… I have a bad feeling about this,” the half-Churyen responded. Within a moment a Mersighdonian voice came over the comm system. “The landing bubble has opened. The Death’s Vein may proceed.” “Roger that. We’re ready,” Erik said, and he began preparing the vessel for its descent into the planet’s atmosphere. The entire crew kept silent during the landing procedure. It was as if Cloudia was not alone in feeling that they might be better off walking into a Hutt’s death arena. *** -----signature----- Daniel Paul Harms (1958-2007) Seph Danthar's diary @ http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/29688948/p1/ lordmaul13's partner in crime
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History