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Author	Topic: Galaxy Episode I screenplay. a spoof of Star Wars.
LordShackles Registered: Aug '05	Date Posted: 8/7/05 11:10pm Subject: Galaxy Episode I screenplay. a spoof of Star Wars.
	Here is my screenplay. its a spoof of star wars. im working on the sequel. hope you like, please dont steal it. BTW, sorry its all spaced to the left. i copied it from a word document. Galaxy Episode I: The Phantom Dennis the Menace Screenplay by Dan Shick Revised First Draft March 15, 2005 PROPERTY OF ©PENGUIN TUBBLE’S FILMS EXT. SPACE- DAY We see a sentence of dialogue appear against a black screen saying: “The following film was based on actual events...” Then, the screen cuts to a space background and “Galaxy” comes from out in front of the camera followed by the words “Episode 1”, like at the beginning of Star Wars. Opening crawl: It is a bad time for the Republic Senate. The newly appointed senator, Senator Poop, has received a threat that he could be assassinated, which could force the Senate into another election. Meanwhile, an evil empire has formed causing corruption across the galaxy. With the news of this, The Jedi Temple has started to train more Jedi’s in order to prepare for a possible war. Meanwhile-while, the evil Emperor has sent his apprentice Darth Taul to the small planet of Arm-Tatooine to kidnap the Ambassador. With word of this getting out, a Jedi has been sent to protect the Ambassador. Upon going there, he will find a few surprises himself… After this lettering disappears into the stars, two ships come into view at different sides of the screen. They slowly come towards one another. They then run right into each other. We hear an “Ouch” or something. We then close up on large ship known as a Star Destroyer. Another much smaller ship approaches. INT. STAR DESTROYER- NIGHT We see an Imperial Worker in front of the radar screen. WORKER 1 B-42, you are clear for a landing. Repeat, B-42. In the background a man stands up and yells “Bingo!” CUT TO- INT. SMALLER THAN STAR DESTROYER SHIP- NIGHT We see the back of the man driving the ship. He is wearing a hood. MAN DRIVING B-42 (Picks up radio) This is B-42, over. IMPERIAL WORKER (Over the radio) Go ahead, 42. MAN DRIVING B-42 Permission to land in South Bay, over over. IMPERIAL WORKER Permission granted, over over over. EXT. SPACE- NIGHT We see a shot of the ship going towards the Star Destroyer. INT. SOUTH BAY- NIGHT We now see the small ship enter and land in the South Bay. A bunch of Thunder-Storm Troopers, men who work for the evil Empire, run towards the just-landed ship to greet the driver. The door to the small ship opens and out walks the driver. He is wearing a hood so we cannot see him. All of the men look terrified as the hooded stranger walks by. The music builds with intensity as stranger makes his way to the end of the docking bay. The camera turns to show a General standing at the end of the bay. Even the General seems tense. Finally the hooded man arrives at the General. The music is now very loud and tense as the hooded man is about to take down his hood. When he finally does, the music stops. We find that the hooded man was a UPS guy. UPS GUY (Pulling out a clipboard) Sign here, please. GENERAL (looking relieved) Oh, right. He signs for the package. But then, suddenly, the UPS guys whips out a light saber, showing us that he was in a disguise. JEDI (AKA UPS Guy) HA HA! He then starts stabbing everybody with the lightsaber as he moves through the Star Destroyer. Finally, the Jedi reaches a secret chamber. He bursts the door open to find a man in a black cape with a hood. It is the Emperor. JEDI Ok, Emperor, it looks like your Emperor-ing days are over. EMPEROR Nice try, Jedi. But you are no match for me. JEDI Yes I am. EMPEROR No you’re not. JEDI I am. EMPEROR Not. AT THE SAME TIME: EMPEROR JEDI Not, not not not not. Am, am am am am am. EMPEROR So be it, Jedi. The Emperor pulls out a red lightsaber. The Jedi raises his lightsaber. They fight a choreographed fight (jokes added in as filming) until the Emperor has killed the Jedi. EMPEROR (Like Chris Tucker) Wipe yourself off, man. You dead. INT JEDI TEMPLE- DAY We see a shot of the Jedi Temple. We then cut into the Temple where we see many Jedi all sitting in a room. This is known as the Jedi Council. The leader of the council is an extremely small man named Soda. SODA Terrible, this incident is. Terrible. We then turn to Mace Windu, who has made a transformation from black to white (he’s no longer African American) Mace raises his hand. Everybody looks at him like he is a retard. Finally Soda calls on him. SODA What is it, Mace? MACE We must train more Jedi. We will be no match for the Empire if- He stops after noticing that the whole council is looking at him funny. MACE What is it? JEDI 1 There’s something different about you, Mace. JEDI 3 Did you get your hair cut? MACE Uh, yeah. Like I was saying, we need to train more jive turkeys. SODA Afraid, I am, that no more Jedi are there left to train. That Jedi who was killed by the Emperor was our last hope. Now screwed we all will be. JEDI 4 We have another pressing issue, Master Soda. SODA What? JEDI 4 It appears that the Emperor is planning to send his apprentice, Darth Taul, to the planet of Arm-Tatooine to kidnap the Ambassador. JEDI 5 I think it would be a wise decision to send Obi-Too Kenobi to the planet to protect the Ambassador. SODA Talk to Kenobi about this, I will. INT. SENATE- DAY We see a shot of the Republic Senate. We then cut to the inside where we see the newly appointed Senator Poop. We see a bunch of politicians who aren’t important sitting in a room. In walks the Senator. POLITICIAN 1 Good morning, Senator Poop. POOP Good morning, everyone. What’s on the schedule for today, Big Basketball Head? We turn to see a man with a basketball for a head stand up. BASKETBALL HEAD Well, you have brunch with the Chancellor at 12, Tea with yourself at 2, and someone is going to sneak in to your office and try to assassinate you at 4. POOP Sounds like a busy day. POLITICIAN 4 (With a weird voice.) Indeed. A man soon enters. This man is Tarkin, a bodyguard to Senator Poop. TARKIN Senator Poop! POOP What is it, Tarkin? TARKIN You are in danger, Senator! Get away from the windows! He runs and tackles the senator. POOP Ouch. What was the point of that? TARKIN Someone is planning on assassinating you, sir! POOP That’s not until 4, Tarkin. TARKIN We must put extra security in here. We can’t loose you, sir! POOP Ok. Suddenly, a little red laser dot appears on the Senator’s forehead, making it look like there is a sniper pointed at him. TARKIN (After seeing the dot) Ahhhhhh!!! Down sir! DOWN! We then turn to Politician 2 who is holding a laser light pointed at the Senator’s head. POLITICIAN 2 Oh, my bad. Politician 2 puts the laser light back in his pocket. TARKIN You see, sir. We can’t be too careful. POOP You’re right. My God, man, you’re right. He turns to the others. POOP That’s it! I’m making a new party. Operation Squid Wipe. We’ll hire a bunch of people to protect me from this assassinator. And you (points to Politician 5) must hire someone to find out who is trying to assassinate me. POLITICIAN 5 Yes, sir. POOP Chancellor Palpatine, I want you to help him. PALPATINE Yes. Palpatine suddenly drops some of the papers he was holding onto the floor. They have the words HOW TO ASSASSINATE SENATOR POOP, BY PALPATINE. Other say: To do list: ASSASSINATE SENATOR POOP BECAUSE HE’S FULL OF POOP. POOP Oh, I see you’ve dropped you’re papers. Poop bends down and picks them up. He doesn’t even notice what they say. He then hands the papers back to Palpatine. Everyone looks at Poop as if he’s retarded. PALPATINE Uh, thanks. POOP (pulling another paper out of his pocket) Oh yeah and I think you left this in the bathroom the other day. This paper says: I’m CHANCELLOR PALPATINE, WHO IS ALSO THE EMPEROR, WHO IS GOING TO ASSASSINATE SENATOR POOP AT 4 TOMORROW. He hands the paper to Palpatine, not noticing a thing. PALPATINE Right, I’ll just be going then. Palpatine runs out of the room. There is a moment of silence. POOP Well, let’s get to work on this security. And make sure you look for any clues to find out who is behind this assassination. INT. STAR DESTROYER- NIGHT We see the Emperor in the main hall. EMPEROR Darth Taul, come in here! Darth Taul enters the room. He is extremely tall. As he is walking towards the Emperor, his head runs into a series of things (such as pipes, a fan, etc.) that are hanging from the ceiling. He finally reaches the Emperor, while grasping his head in agony. TAUL What is it, my master? EMPEROR You must go now to Arm-Tatooine. Be cautious in kidnapping the Ambassador. TAUL Ok. Oh, and just one more question. EMPEROR What? TAUL Uh, why are we kidnapping the Ambassador? There is a long moment of silence, as the Emperor must think of the reason why. EMPEROR Uh...Ok, wait. To... Well, you no what, don’t question my authority, dang it! TAUL Sorry, Master. Taul leaves the room and rids off on his spaceship. INT. JEDI TEMPLE- DAY We see Soda walking along with Obi-Too Kenobi. KENOBI And you think I am ready for my first big mission? You want to send me to Arm-Tatooine? SODA I no that it has been tough since the death of your former Master, Qui-Gon Spaghetti, but under stand you must that few more Jedi are there left. Plus this is a suicide mission and we didn’t want to waste any of the good Jedi on something like this. KENOBI What? SODA Nothing. May the force be with you on your mission, as I am sure you will probably be killed. KENOBI Thank you, Master Soda. INT. SENATOR’S APARTMENT- NIGHT We see the senator in his bedroom. He is lying in bed with all of his bodyguards, including Palpatine and Tarkin, standing around his bed. TARKIN I guess there was no danger, Poop. And you made it past 4 without anyone trying to assassinate you. POOP I feel very lucky. Oh, Chancellor Palpatine, would you please refill my water glass before I go to bed. He hands an empty glass to Palpatine. PALPATINE It would be my pleasure, sir. Palpatine takes the glass into the kitchen. He fills it up with water and secretly puts two tablets into the cup. This makes the water turn purple. He then returns to the room and hands the glass to Poop. PALPATINE Here’s your water, sir. Poop looks at the purple water for a second, but then drinks it as if he didn’t notice. A few seconds later, Poop gets a funny look on his face then runs into the bathroom. The words “Two Hours Later” appear against a black screen. TARKIN He’s been in there long enough; I’m going to check on him. Tarkin walks into the bathroom. A few seconds later we hear him scream. He runs back out. TARKIN He’s dead! Politician 3 walks in the bathroom then walks back out. POLITICIAN 3 It appears that Senator Poop has...pooped his pants to death. He never made it to the toilet. He must have over dosed on Laxatives. Tarkin starts crying and knocking things off tables, as he is in agony over the death. POLITICIAN 2 Well, you no what this means now. We must hold another election for senator. PALPATINE In light of this death, I feel it my duty to run as senator. In the honor of Poop, of course. POLITICIAN 1 That is very wise of you, Chancellor. A man suddenly jumps out. MAN Bum bum BUM! Everybody stares at him for a moment. The man nervously laughs. MAN Uh, ha, AND SCENE (Swiping his arms)!!! He then runs away. EXT. DOCKING BAY- DAWN We see Obi’s ship landing in the docking bay on Arm Tatooine. A robot that looks like a human greets him. ROBOT Hello I am C-3BO, Robin Williams relations. KENOBI Uh, you don’t look much like a robot. 3BO We’re running low on budget. This is all the director could afford. KENOBI Oh. 3BO You will be staying with a slave family called the Skyrunners. It’s a boy and his mother. KENOBI K. They walk off. Suddenly, in the background we see a cloaked man. He has been spying on Obi-Too. He takes down his hood to show us that it’s Darth Taul. Darth Taul starts laughing and evil laugh. TAUL Ha ha ha ha ha ha- Darth Taul is interrupted when he lets out a ginormous fart. He then looks behind him to see a guy standing there. GUY (with a disgusted look on his face) That’s gross, man! The guy then shakes his head and walks away. TAUL I didn’t think anybody was around. I’m kind of embarrassed now, I- oh screw it. INT. JEDI TEMPLE- DAY We see Soda and the Jedi Council all sitting around. They are all looking at Mace, still laughing because Mace Windu is no longer a black person. MACE What? JEDI 2 (laughing) Nothing, nothing. Uh, (fast) so Michael Jackson, tell us what you plan to do about this recent assassination? MACE (noticing the name Michael Jackson) Uh, well, I suppose we could- He stops when everybody starts laughing to themselves again. MACE Just what the squawk is so funny, man! JEDI 4 (laughing) Nothings funny. MACE (not laughing) Then why are you laughing? SODA (laughing) Well, we- we’re not laughing, you’re laughing. While the whole council starts laughing at Mace, we hear someone shout “Whitie!” MACE Listen, the senate is holding another election and- He is once again interrupted by the laughing. MACE That’s it! Next person who laughs is gonna get slapped! They all stop laughing. But suddenly, one of the Jedi’s start cracking up and a hand appears out of nowhere and slaps him. The same happens until all the other Jedi have basically been slapped. EXT. GRAVEYARD- DAY We see a bunch of people have all gathered around for Senator Poop’s funeral. Once the priest is done speaking, Tarkin goes up to the podium. TARKIN I just wanted to say a few things about my good friend Senator Poop. He pauses. He then starts crying hysterically. We can barely understand what he’s saying. TARKIN (Crying hysterically) YOU HAVE ALWAYS BEEN A GOOD FRIEND TO ME! ALWAYS! AND WHENEVER I PUT HIM IN HIS HAT! I PUT HIM IN HIS HAT! NEVER AGAIN! EVER! He then pulls out an Academy Award statue for best actor and starts waving it around. TARKIN (still crying) I JUST WANT TO THANK SENATOR POOP FOR THE INSPIRATION! HE WAS ALWAYS A GOOD FRIEND!! We then hear music start to play to let Tarkin no that his speech has gone past the time limit, just like at the Academy Awards. TARKIN STOP THAT MUSIC! I’M NOT FINISHED! STOP!!! Two big bouncers then come onto the platform and start to carry him off the platform. BOUNCER 1 Ok, guy, take it easy. They then both carry him off. We then turn back to the audience and get a close up on Palpatine, who is sitting down and talking to the politician next to him. POLITICIAN 5 Don’t you think we should wait to announce that you’re running for senator? PALPATINE No, we will move forward with our plan as...(thinking of a word) planned. POLITICIAN 5 Ok. We turn back to the podium where we see the priest talking. PRIEST The late Senator Poop was always a good friend to everybody he knew. As the priest is talking, two people start to walk past but stop whenever they hear what the priest is saying. PRIEST I always liked Poop. The two people then get a shocked look on their faces. PRIEST I remember when Poop was much smaller. I was babysitting him and one time he fell into the toilet. Of course my hands were broken and in casts at the time so I had to pick Poop up out of the toilet with my mouth. The two people look at the priest like he’s a sicko. PRIEST Another time, I was playing cards with Poop, and he had gotten the cards so dirty that we couldn’t use them anymore. He said he had a Royal Flush, but I knew he was full of poop. The two people look even more disgusted than ever. One of them speaks out. ONE OF THE TWO PEOPLE You have issues, man! The priest looks over at the two people. PRIEST What? INT. ARM-TATOOINE PALACE- DAY We see Obi-Too talking with the Ambassador. KENOBI I’ve been hired to protect you, Ambassador. AMBASSADOR Well I hope you’re better than the last Jedi who tried to protect me. He’s sitting over in that chair. He points over to a chair. There is a straw laying in it. KENOBI That’s because it’s a straw. AMBASSADOR Oh, so that’s why he was so quiet. KENOBI Listen, just stay up in your bedroom so you don’t get killed. AMBASSADOR But I’m scared that the Boogeyman is gonna get me. KENOBI Hey, shut up. AMBASSADOR Oh goodness. Kenobi then turns to C-3BO. KENOBI C-3BO? 3BO Yes. KENOBI Show me where this Skyrunner family lives. 3BO Follow me, sir. 3BO takes Kenobi to a small house. They knock on the door. A boy, about 15 or 16, answers. This boy is Anakin. ANAKIN Yes? KENOBI Hello, I’m the Jedi that will be staying with you and your mother. ANAKIN Oh yes, right this way. They walk into the house. A man walks up to Anakin. KENOBI (looking at the man) Oh, you didn’t tell me you had a father. MAN I’m his mother. KENOBI Oh. INT. AMBASSADOR’S ROOM- NIGHT We see the ambassador getting ready for bed. After he’s got his PJ’s, he grabs a teddy bear, lies down in his bed, and turns off the light. AMBASSADOR The dark is very scary, Mr. Worthington, my be-loved teddy bear. It is quiet for a bit and then we hear a bump from under the bed. AMBASSADOR What was that, Mr. Worthington? We hear the bump again. AMBASSADOR Boogeyman...is that you? Then we see something in a black hood get up from under the bed. AMBASSADOR Oh goodness! He’s come to get me, Mr. Worthington. The Ambassador turns on the lamp. AMBASSADOR (to Mr. Worthington) I told you he was real. He looks over to the hooded man. The man lowers the hood and we now see that it is Darth Taul. AMBASSADOR (still thinking it’s the Boogeyman) Oh my. You’re even uglier than I imagined. Darth Taul runs and tackles him. Ambassador reaches for the walkie-talkie he had laying by his bead. AMBASSADOR (into the walkie-talkie) GOODNESS! OH MY! SOMEBODY COME IN! JONIE! CHACHIE! ANYONE!!! We cut to the lobby of the palace where we see Jonnie and Chachie. Jonnie picks up the walkie-talkie. JONNIE What is it now, Ambassador? We cut back to the Ambassador. Taul is now pulling the Ambassador around by his feet. AMBASSADOR I’m being attacked by the Boogeyman! We cut back to Jonnie and Chachie. JONNIE (to Chachie) Dear God. He thinks he’s being attacked by the Boogeyman again. Jonnie puts the talkie back up to his face again. JONNIE (into the walkie-talkie) Oh yeah. That’s pretty bad. Uh, so just what does this Boogeyman look like? We cut back to the Ambassador who is now being thrown around by Taul. AMBASSADOR Well, he’s very tall. And muscular. Back to Jonnie. JONNIE Oh yeah, he must work out. Back to the Ambassador. AMBASSADOR Hold on let me ask him. (To Darth Taul “Boogeyman”)Do you work out? Darth Taul stops what he doing. TAUL Oh, yeah I do on the weekends. AMBASSADOR (back into the walkie-talkie) He says he does on the weekends. INT. SKYRUNNER KITCHEN- NIGHT We see Obi Too is now sitting down with Anakin and his mother at the dinner table eating food. KENOBI So, what is it you to do? ANAKIN We’re slaves. KENOBI (starts laughing but tries to hold it in.) ANAKIN Why are you laughing? KENOBI Oh, it’s nothing. Anyway- MOTHER Anakin, pass me the salt. Anakin suddenly lifts his and the salt starts to float. Anakin then gestures his hands towards his mother and the salt floats over to his mother. KENOBI Where did you learn to do that?! MOTHER Oh, he has always had special abilities. He can make things float and sometimes foresee the future. But I never thought it out of the ordinary because I’m a retard. KENOBI Did it ever occur to you that this boy could be the last hope for the Jedi? MOTHER No. KENOBI Come here Anakin, I want to give you a Mediclorian test. ANAKIN What’s a Mediclorian test? KENOBI Something I made up just now. Obi-Too suddenly gets a shocked look on his face. He senses that the Ambassador is in trouble. MOTHER What’s wrong? KENOBI The Ambassador’s in trouble! Kenobi gets up and runs toward the door. When he gets there he runs right in to the door really hard. MOTHER There’s a door there. KENOBI Shut up! Kenobi then runs out the house. INT. AMBASSADOR’S BEDROOM- NIGHT Obi-Too Kenobi bursts through the door into the Ambassador’s bedroom. When he enters he sees the Ambassador and Darth Taul sitting on the bed playing cards. AMBASSADOR Hit me. They then both turn to Obi-Too. AMBASSADOR Oh yeah, we’re supposed to be fighting. Darth Taul then tackles the Ambassador to the ground. Kenobi runs and throws him off of the Ambassador. KENOBI Ambassador, hide somewhere safe. I’ll take care of Darth Taul. AMBASSADOR Oh, they have a name for the Boogeyman now? KENOBI Hey, Ambassador, you’re gay. Shut up and hide somewhere. AMBASSADOR We’ll jee-wize me! The Ambassador runs out into the parking garage. AMBASSADOR (to himself) Must hide somewhere safe, must hide somewhere safe, must hide somewhere safe! He then lays down right under the wheel of a huge car. AMBASSADOR This should be safe enough. We then cut back to the bedroom where Obi-Too and Darth Taul are getting ready to fight. TAUL I will destroy you, Jedi. Cause I’m a Sith and...well I guess just because I’m a Sith. They both throw their cloaks off onto the floor, getting ready for the fight. They both slowly get out their lightsabers and start them up. The tense builds like it’s going to be a long and awesome fight. Finally, Obi-Too runs at Darth Taul. He swings the lightsaber once and it completely misses Taul. Taul stands there for a couple of seconds, then falls completely dead onto the ground. KENOBI Oh, that was easy. Wow. I mean I really... Obi stands there for a few seconds and then runs out of the room to find the Ambassador. INT. JEDI TEMPLE- DAY We see Soda meditating in a dark room. Mace soon enters. SODA Conspiracy I smell in the recent death of Senator Poop. MACE What do you mean? SODA Not accidental was his death. MACE I still don’t get what you’re trying to say? SODA Planned his death was. MACE I still don’t get it? SODA Someone freakin’ killed him! Jesus, what’s wrong with you?! MACE But who could have done this? SODA Clouded this mystery is. Only by the end of the movie, will it be solved. In the meantime, keep a close eye on the senate you will. MACE Right. INT. SENATOR POOP’S APARTMENT- DAY We see Tarkin in Senator Poop’s old apartment, grieving. TARKIN (looking at an old picture of Poop) Goodbye, old friend... He starts for the door when he spots Palpatine’s coat on the coat rack. TARKIN Palpatine must have left his coat here the other night. I’d better get it back to him. He picks the coat up. As he does, something falls out of the coat pocket. TARKIN What’s this? Tarkin bends down to see what fell out of Palpatine’s coat. It is a box of Laxatives. TARKIN Oh my God...Palpatine...has bathroom problems. Well I’d better get this back to him fast so he can-(finally realizing) what a minute... Palpatine must have...that son of a! He killed Poop! Tarkin gets an evil look in his eyes and starts screaming in rage. TARKIN (comic screaming) YOU’RE DEAD TO ME, PALPATINE!!! YOU WILL PAAAYYYYY!!!!!!! EXT. SKYRUNNER HOUSE- NIGHT We see Anakin’s mother sitting outside. Obi-Too soon comes out. KENOBI Your son has extraordinary abilities. If trained by the Jedi council, he could help bring balance back to the force. MOTHER Yes, I no. KENOBI Who is the father? MOTHER I don’t know. He’s not even my real child. It was late. I had just got off of work and I found him in a trashcan dressed like a clown. I took him home and pretended like he was my own. When his real parents came looking for him, I stabbed them both with a trident 32 times and buried them in the backyard. I was having a barbeque the next day and I had run out of meat so I then unburied them and cooked them for food. I ate their liver first. The hot, blood ran down my face as I- KENOBI My God, no more! I’m taking that boy away with me! You’re a freakin’ sicko! We then cut to inside the house. Kenobi soon walks in to the kitchen where Anakin is cleaning. KENOBI Anakin, I’m afraid I have some bad news. ANAKIN What is it? KENOBI It appears that your mom is not your real mom. Your real mom was stabbed with a trident and barbequed. ANAKIN (shocked) What?! KENOBI Listen, you must be trained to become a Jedi. You alone have the power to bring the force back in balance. Come with me and you will be a Jedi, I promise. ANAKIN What about my mother? KENOBI Trust me, you don’t want to know. Just pack your stuff and we’ll leave right away. ANAKIN Ok. Anakin goes to pack his stuff. He packs the most useless things. INT. SENATE- DAY We see a bunch of politicians sitting in a room. In walks Palpatine. PALPATINE I have great news, everybody! They’ve elected me Senator! They all start claping. PALPATINE The first order of business, we must create the senate’s best cup of coffee. Second order of business, we will all have a contest to see who can be the first to eat a bowl of low-fat cottage cheese. (Faster as if he doesn’t care) Oh, and also we’ll do some political stuff too… The politicians all speak out saying “Oh right, right.” INT. JEDI COUNCIL- DAY We see Soda speaking to the Jedi Council. SODA I have some important news, everybody. One of you in this room is going to die today. And that one of you is- Soda is interrupted when his cell phone rings. SODA Oh, hold on I have to take this. Soda whips out the cell phone. SODA (On the phone) Hello. Yes, oh hello! Soda turns to the Council, who still has a shocked look on their face from the whole “one will die” thing. SODA (to the council) It’s Kenobi. Soda talks back into the phone. SODA (on the phone) What’s that? We cut to Obi-Too on Arm-Tatooine who is talking to Soda on his phone. Obi-Too is standing outside of Anakin’s house. The sun is setting in the background. KENOBI I am bringing a boy back with me for the council to look at. I believe he is the one who will bring balance to the force. Plus his mom’s a cannibal. We cut back to Soda. SODA (on phone) Bring him to us, you will. Back to Kenobi. KENOBI (on phone) Yeah, I know. That’s what I just said. Back to Soda. SODA Yes, and also, bring the boy to us and we will decide if he is the chosen one...we will. Back to Kenobi. KENOBI That’s what I said! Back to Soda. SODA Make sure you bring this boy to us, because the chosen one he may be. Back to Kenobi. KENOBI That’s it! When ever I get back there I’m gonna beat the ba-Jesus out of you, green freak! Back to Soda. SODA Another thing, when you get back here make sure you beat the ba-Jesus out of me, you will. Back to Kenobi. Obi-Too Kenobi hangs up the phone. Anakin soon walks out of his house with a suitcase. His mother walks out with him. ANAKIN (to mother) Goodbye mom, I love you. MOTHER I love you to, son of another. They hug goodbye. Then Anakin and Obi-Too both slowly walk towards Kenobi’s ship, get in, then fly off into the setting sun. The credits then immediately pop up against a space background, like at the end of Star Wars. -To be Continued in Galaxy Episode II: Heart-Attack of the Clones.- END
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Eirate_rules Registered: Jul '05	Date Posted: 8/8/05 1:26pm Subject: RE: Galaxy Episode I screenplay. a spoof of Star Wars. - Date Edited: 8/8/05 1:26pm (1 edits total) Edited By: Eirate_rules
	can't breathe...laughing so hard...need air.... -----signature----- Ae ú-esteliach nad... estelio han. Estelio ammen. I got a jar of dirt, I got a jar of diiiirt, and guess whats inside it!! Twas Beauty that killed the Beast Lying is the most fun a girl can have without taking her clothes off....but its better if you do.
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stormqueen874 Registered: Aug '05	Date Posted: 8/8/05 1:59pm Subject: RE: Galaxy Episode I screenplay. a spoof of Star Wars.
	funny! I love the beginning with the UPS Jedi in disguise and the fight with the Emperor, with the am-so's and are-not's. I could just see it happening! Stormqueen -----signature----- Master to kenobiwanobi Shadows of the Future: TPM timetravel AU, Obi/Ani/Qui bonding http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/24413082/p1/?0
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neoizchosen Registered: Aug '05	Date Posted: 8/8/05 5:40pm Subject: RE: Galaxy Episode I screenplay. a spoof of Star Wars.
	Dude!!! You have got to write more of this! This is freakin hilarious! "Plus, your mom's a cannibal." "That's because it's a piece of straw." "Oh, so that's why he wasn't moving." Side-splittingly hilarious! Cannot WAIT to red more!! -----signature----- Check out my Yoda fanfic! Rise of a Jedi Master: The Story of Yoda
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LordShackles Registered: Aug '05	Date Posted: 8/9/05 2:26pm Subject: RE: Galaxy Episode I screenplay. a spoof of Star Wars.
	actually, i just finished the sequel. shall i post it? your friend, Dan
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Eirate_rules Registered: Jul '05	Date Posted: 8/9/05 5:54pm Subject: RE: Galaxy Episode I screenplay. a spoof of Star Wars.
	YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHY WOULD YOU NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! P.S senator Poop gay ambassator Soda Michal Jackson falls over laughing -----signature----- Ae ú-esteliach nad... estelio han. Estelio ammen. I got a jar of dirt, I got a jar of diiiirt, and guess whats inside it!! Twas Beauty that killed the Beast Lying is the most fun a girl can have without taking her clothes off....but its better if you do.
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Eirate_rules Registered: Jul '05	Date Posted: 8/9/05 5:57pm Subject: RE: Galaxy Episode I screenplay. a spoof of Star Wars.
	YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHY WOULD YOU NOT!!!!!!!!! P.S senator Poop gay ambassator Soda Michal Jackson falls over laughing -----signature----- Ae ú-esteliach nad... estelio han. Estelio ammen. I got a jar of dirt, I got a jar of diiiirt, and guess whats inside it!! Twas Beauty that killed the Beast Lying is the most fun a girl can have without taking her clothes off....but its better if you do.
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Eirate_rules Registered: Jul '05	Date Posted: 8/9/05 5:58pm Subject: RE: Galaxy Episode I screenplay. a spoof of Star Wars.
	SORRY!!! Posted lots on accident!!! -----signature----- Ae ú-esteliach nad... estelio han. Estelio ammen. I got a jar of dirt, I got a jar of diiiirt, and guess whats inside it!! Twas Beauty that killed the Beast Lying is the most fun a girl can have without taking her clothes off....but its better if you do.
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rabe_rocks Registered: Jul '05	Date Posted: 8/12/05 6:26pm Subject: RE: Galaxy Episode I screenplay. a spoof of Star Wars. - Date Edited: 9/12/05 4:32pm (1 edits total) Edited By: rabe_rocks
	DEJA-VU! plez post it, i will do the happy dance if you do! ha a trident! (has any one been watchin; anchor man lately) -----signature----- My Elvish Name is Alatáriël Elendil, what's yours? Find it out now http://www.chriswetherell.com/elf/ "Good Morning StarShine, the earth says hello." -Willy Wonka Eirate_rules's roomy& E-sister
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Fluff-Slayer Registered: Jun '05	Date Posted: 8/12/05 7:04pm Subject: RE: Galaxy Episode I screenplay. a spoof of Star Wars.
	Giggles Oh, that made me so happy... Hilarious! 'Specially with Palpatine and the papers... HAH! (Do you need a beta-er? Please PM me if so!) -----signature----- "Sometimes glass glitters more than diamonds because it has more to prove." --Terry Pratchett
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