Author Topic: The Heart of the Jedi -- Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan, JA -- COMPLETE -- 28-Apr-2007
NabooPop 
Registered: Jun '00
6029_Sio Bibble
Date Posted: 4/29/07 2:08pm Subject: RE: The Heart of the Jedi -- Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan, JA -- COMPLETE -- 28-Apr-2007
A great end to a great story. Bravo!!!

 

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Don't blame me, I voted for Valorum.
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Veloz 
Registered: Aug '04
39908_Obi-Wan Kenobi
Date Posted: 4/29/07 3:34pm Subject: RE: The Heart of the Jedi -- Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan, JA -- COMPLETE -- 28-Apr-2007
Awww it's sad to see this story end because i enjoyed it so much, but i guess all things must come to and end wink

I loved that ending applause

Wonderful job with this story, thanks a lot for sharing it! hugs grin peace

 

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"Hello there!"
"Remember the Force will be with you..always" - Obi Wan Kenobi, ANH
"Who's the more foolish...the fool or the fool who follows him?"- Obi Wan Kenobi, ANH
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azizah 
Registered: Sep '06
13901_Obi-Wan Kenobi
Date Posted: 5/1/07 1:13pm Subject: RE: The Heart of the Jedi -- Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan, JA -- COMPLETE -- 28-Apr-2007
Wonderful from beginning to end. Qui-Gon's vision was perhaps my favorite part. Too hard to pick.

Did I see a promise of another story somewhere up in the posts? You know whatever comments you leave here are legally binding. Ok, maybe not, but I really enjoy your work and look forward to more.


azizah

 

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Fifilla 
Registered: Mar '06
8151_Sando Aqua Monster
Date Posted: 5/2/07 1:06am Subject: RE: The Heart of the Jedi -- Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan, JA -- COMPLETE -- 28-Apr-2007
applause Fantastic ending to a wonderful story!!! applause

I loved that you brought back Bant and Tahl in the last chapter happy Very nice description of the friendship between Obi and Bant and Qui and Tahl.
He let go of her arm and quickly stepped back, keeping away from her feet so she could not trip him. She had done that before.
laugh That made me laugh!

 

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"There's always a bigger fish."
Fear Of Failure - young Qui-Gon (WIP) > http://boards.theforce.net/before_the_saga/b10475/27642896
Padawan to Valairy_Scot happy
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Shahar 
Registered: Nov '03
24161_Jedi
Date Posted: 5/3/07 11:06am Subject: RE: The Heart of the Jedi -- Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan, JA -- COMPLETE -- 28-Apr-2007
Oh noooo its over sad I really liked the story, I enjoyed it really much. Its over sad

 

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Attack on the Senate - http://boards.theforce.net/before_the_saga/b10475/22676187/p1/?33
Completed - Feedback will be appreciated!
The Fight for Survival - http://boards.theforce.net/Message.aspx?topic=23569852&brd=10475
Sequel to AotS, in progress
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ratna 
Registered: Mar '07
7949_Jappor Snippet
Date Posted: 5/5/07 7:21am Subject: RE: The Heart of the Jedi -- Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan, JA -- COMPLETE -- 28-Apr-2007
late to this, only read thru part 11, love it

The action at the beginning was so well done. Pulled this reader in completely.

For skill and loyalty --- the bindings of his braid. So touching!

The whole scene with Qui-gon in the Crystal Chamber was awesome.

He patted himself one more time and found one last green crystal hiding inside his tunic. Hoping for a moment, he held it up. It felt familiar, but it only mutely glinted back at him, just like all the others.

"Leaving friends behind, you are, Master Qui-Gon." Yoda's tone was low and even, with no high pitches of amusement this time.

Unable to speak, Qui-Gon nodded. It wasn't his anymore. It never really had been his. Jedi had no possessions.

Yoda held out his rough three-fingered hand. Qui-Gon carefully placed it there. Yoda's claws closed over it; he took it and hobbled back into the room. He bend down and reverently laid it with the other crystals where it belonged.


Exquisite.



Your interactions between Qui and Obi are filled with philosophy, humor, intimacy. Beautifully and humanly characterized. The reader becomes a padawan on a journey of learning. (bows)

Loved the single file through Coruscant. GREAT lesson.

Btw seductive use of Force influence ... Qui-gon ... huge amounts of trouble ... please direct us to where we can read all about it !!! (Ok, found it. [mercy day] Cool story. The Force was strong in that place because of the Forgiveness.)

Back to Heart of the Jedi ...

So many exquisite moments:

His hand tightened around her small slender one. He could feel the Force through her soft skin, warm and moist and scented like salt water. The control and calm that he had often struggled for came to her naturally, because it was part of her, like Qui-Gon's skill was a part of him.

"I've always thought you would be a better Jedi than I." His lips curled in a small smile. "At least, a wiser one."

She smiled back. "You will be wise, too, Obi-Wan. I can feel that." She laid her other hand over his. Then her expression became serious again. "But Obi-Wan, do you think you need to be like Qui-Gon to be a good Jedi?"


(whole chapter was beautiful btw, ending with the room and the realization, beautiful, understated, intimate, perfect.)

that's as far as i got.

-- until next time

 

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Faster than the speed of light is the speed of darkness. Faster than the speed of darkness is the speed of thought.
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ratna 
Registered: Mar '07
7949_Jappor Snippet
Date Posted: 5/6/07 3:11am Subject: RE: The Heart of the Jedi -- Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan, JA -- COMPLETE -- 28-Apr-2007
ok, i finished reading. beautiful, beautiful story. the characters LIVE.

"Training such as this tests our limits, to prepare us for what we may face as Knights. But the test is not the goal. You are young, Obi-Wan, and do not know your limits. I am to guide you in that and I see little value in pushing you past where you cannot go." Qui-Gon told him.
Oh, yes, Qui-gon, you're such a good teacher!!!

Obi-Wan lowered his head and then raised it again.
"Can I help?" he asked.
Qui-Gon looked down at those earnest blue-gray eyes and the answer immediately flooded into him.
Yes.
He had planned to try one more time assembling his lightsaber before going to Master Yoda and accepting whatever cryptically instructive advice the ancient council member had.
It had not once occurred to him to ask Obi-Wan for his help.
The journey of Master and Padawan is a shared one. The Master may guide the Padawan, but when both teach, they both learn.

I'M MELLLLTIIIIINNNGG!!


Luv_Ewan wrote:

Obi-Wan glanced back to where Mace Windu sat in the Throne, waiting for Eenid. "Why did you stop me?"
"Because it is difficult to teach you anything when you are unconscious."
A corner of Obi-Wan's mouth twitched upward. Qui-Gon smiled back to encourage it.

That's what's so lovely about this story. The relationship is balanced, they can smile with one another through anything. You get Qui-Gon's mix of wisdom, roguishness, and uncertainties just right. And Obi-Wan too. The narrative allows room for everyone to have their say; it doesn't focus on one person too long. I look for an update to this first thing every day.

Now if only I could convince you somehow to update every day...

Great job, again.


I couldn't agree more!!



"Master, what do we do now?"
Qui-Gon's dark blue eyes opened and his bearded face smiled under the hood of his robe.
"Now we find our hearts, Obi-Wan."

That's beautiful.

Turning around, the tunnel he had just come from looked dark, like a murky past.
What a beautiful metaphor, considering the road that has brought Qui-gon to this cave.


Holding the deactivated weapon and focusing on it, he could again see the faint after-image of the blade through the Force.
I love that. Like an aura.

Obi-Wan had seen Jedi sparring together with deactivated sabers before, but he had never imagined that it was anything more than a precision exercise.
Ok, now this is just frickin' cool. You're really running with this concept and it's awesome.


Obi-Wan saw Qui-Gon's face through the nearly invisible crossed beams of green and blue. The deep blue eyes of the older man locked on his for a moment, the Force bright and intense between them. And Obi-Wan heard the echo of his Master's thoughts, the words themselves as if whispered in his ear.
//This is what I wish to teach you, my Padawan.//
They pushed back from each other and Obi-Wan answered with his own thought. He smiled when Qui-Gon's eyes widened with surprise.
//I will learn it, my Master.//

I surrender. This is just ----- words fail me. What an ending!


 

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Faster than the speed of light is the speed of darkness. Faster than the speed of darkness is the speed of thought.
Fic linx in my bio
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ardavenport 
Registered: Dec '04
22348_Luke Skywalker
Date Posted: 6/30/07 8:20pm Subject: RE: The Heart of the Jedi -- Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan, JA -- COMPLETE -- 28-Apr-2007
Valairy_Scot: Thanks much! All stories do need to end sometime, so one can write new ones. wink

earlybird-obi-wan: Thank-you! happy

Gkilkenny: Thanks! The blades being an extension of them seemed natural. I think there has to be something really special about lightsabers and the Force for Jedi to be so devoted to them.

dianethx: Glad you liked it! The ghostly blades comes entirely from Luke's statement, "I could almost see the remote." in ANH. I assume that the Force gives Jedi some ghostly aura of things that they can 'see' with their normal senses. I just extended it to something that 'could' be with the deactivated sabers. I also assume that the design of the lightsaber has to have evolved into something that makes it an instinctive weapon for anyone with the Force. That's the only way I can explain why Luke didn't lose any fingers after Obi-Wan gave him a lightsaber in ANH - at least not until his Dad chopped them off in TESB. mischief

VaderLVR64: Thnaks! happy Glad you liked the ending.

NabooPop: Thank-you!

Veloz: Yes, I had to end this story. There are more stories to write. Thanks for reading!

azizah: Thanks for reading! I did enjoy writing this one, filled in a few holes in the JA background.

Fifilla: Thank-you! I felt like I had to bring Bant and Tahl back for completion. They were part of bringing Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan together on their lightsabers, so they had to be there for when they were done.

Shahar: Thanks so much for reading!

ratna: Ooooh, thanks very much! This story is sort of every JA plot bunny I'm had, mashed together into one big plot. I like to start a story in the middle of things; it's fun. But someday I am going to write a mission from beginning to end.

The padawan's braid conspicuously never gets mentioned in the JA books. It's a small detail, but I suppose the Master has to start it sometime. The Crystal Chamber came about just because Obi-Wan a full, working saber in the first JA book and since he didn't have a master, I didn't think he could have been to Illum, so he had to have built it somehow.

Coruscant is this huge city-planet; one could almost have a whole just there. I sometimes wonder what kind of effect the Jedi have in the neighborhood, so I liked getting them outside the Temple.

And thanks for reading Mercy Day, too!

The whole teacher-student dynamic between Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon, plus the difficult life of a Jedi that would bond them together, makes them a very intriguing pair. I think Qui-Gon is partly such a good teacher because he can learn from his student.

The visible saber blade for a deactivated lightsaber really is meant to be aura-like. It's one way of making the lightsaber something more than just a device. They look cool, but they still needed something a little extra, too. I also thought that this might be something that only apprentices learn from experience with their masters, something that really separates the initiates from the padawans.

Thanks again!

 

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Links to all fics -- http://boards.theforce.net/Message.aspx?topic=25405090&brd=10304&start=26223917
The Heart of the Jedi -- http://boards.theforce.net/b/b1/26013327
---- Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan, JA and everything you wanted to know about lightsabers
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Ganki 
Registered: Jan '02
20874_Obi-Wan Kenobi
Date Posted: 7/9/07 4:56pm Subject: RE: The Heart of the Jedi -- Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan, JA -- COMPLETE -- 28-Apr-2007
Loved the fic! The interaction between Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan was brilliant along with the interplay of the true meaning of the lightsaber/jedi relationship. I loved the journey of building a lightsaber and it made me appreciate them more.

The whole fic was beautifully written and a very good read ^__^

 

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“The act of putting pen to paper encourages pause for thought, this in turn makes us think more deeply about life, which helps us regain our equilibrium.” ~Norbet Platt
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ardavenport 
Registered: Dec '04
22348_Luke Skywalker
Date Posted: 7/29/07 8:57pm Subject: RE: The Heart of the Jedi -- Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan, JA -- COMPLETE -- Thanks for the nominations!
Ganki: Thanks! Glad you enjoyed it! I just put in all my speculation about lightsabers and Jedi, and the Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan interactions seem to come naturally for those two. happy


And thanks all for the nominations!

 

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Links to all fics -- http://boards.theforce.net/Message.aspx?topic=25405090&brd=10304&start=26223917
The Heart of the Jedi -- http://boards.theforce.net/b/b1/26013327
---- Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan, JA and everything you wanted to know about lightsabers
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