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Author	Topic: A Graveyard in the Making: Mandalorian Wars, with various KotOR characters, updated 12/15/07
Commander5052 Registered: Aug '05	Date Posted: 9/4/07 3:12pm Subject: A Graveyard in the Making: Mandalorian Wars, with various KotOR characters, updated 12/15/07 - Date Edited: 12/15/07 1:38pm (2 edits total) Edited By: Commander5052
	A Graveyard in the Making The Battle of Malachor V dramatis personae With the Republic Revan--male human, de facto commander of the Republic Navy (holds the rank of General) Malak--male human, Revan's second-in-command (holds the rank of Lieutenant-General) Saul Karath--male human from Telos IV, Admiral of Battlegroup Leviathan Dallan Morvis--male human from Suurja, Captain of the Leviathan Noma Sommos-female human--Admiral of the Third Fleet Carth Onasi-male human from Telos IV, Lieutenant-Commander, helmsman of the Leviathan With the Mandalorian Neo-Crusaders Mandalore the Ultimate--male Taung from Mandalore, leader of the Mandalorians Cassus Fett--male human from Concord Dawn, Mandalore's second-in-command Canderous Ordo--male human from Ordo, Mandalorian commander of Mandalorian Fleet Solus Chapter One: Plans are Made Vice Admiral Saul Karath stalked onto the bridge of the Republic cruiser Leviathan, and all conversation ceased. Karath didn't mind. He was a tall man, with an officer's bearing and graying hair, and he rather liked the respect his newly minted Admiral's insignia garnered for him. He liked the fear even more. But two men on the bridge didn't bow to Karath. The first man wore the robes of a Jedi Knight, his face was swathed in shadow. The second wore red Jedi robes, and his bald head had two blue stripes painted on it. Revan and Malak, the two Jedi who had practically single-handedly turned the tide of the war. Karath's second-in-command, the sardonic Captain Dallan Morvis, walked over to the Admiral. Morvis, a man of average height with a thick black mustache, saluted, his face betraying nothing about why the Jedi had called him to the bridge. "Sir, the Generals will see you now." "Good, Dallan," replied Karath. "It's about time they revaled their infallable plans to us common soldiers." Thus saying, the Admiral strode over to the two Jedi, and saluted. "Generals." "Admiral Karath," said Revan. "You have been asking for some time about our overall plan for this war." "Yes," said Karath, unflinching, "yes I have." "Well, Admiral, the time has come. Intel has reached us that the planet Malachor V is a taboo world in Mandalorian culture, and we can use that against them. We will lure the Mandalorians into a fight at Malachor." "How?" "We'll send Admiral Sommos' Third Fleet to the planet, with your battlegroup, under my personal command, being held in reserve." "Who'll command the Third Fleet?" "Did I misstate, Admiral Karath? Admiral Sommos will command." "Without any Jedi operating within the chain of command?" "Yes, but I have assigned my best General---" Here Malak emitted a small cough. Revan swivelled his hooded face to shoot his apprentice a placating look, then continued. "My second-best General to assist Admiral Sommos with the attack." Saul Karath prided himself on reading men; it was what had led to his long military career, his ability to cater to superior officers' character flaws and vanities. And right now, he thought that Revan was keeping something from him. "That may very well be true, General, but you're keeping something from me. I can tell. You wouldn't send a whole fleet to attack the Mandalorian armada, with a mere battlegroup in reserve, unless you have something that will allow you to win, no matter what happens." Revan pulled back his hood. Karath recoiled. Not from the face, which was surprisingly normal, but from the sheer darkness present in the man's eyes. If the eyes were the window to the soul, Revan had been to hell and back. "You are a very astute man, Admiral Karath," bit out the Jedi officer. "Which is why I will take you into my confidence. I do have something that will guarantee our victory, but I can say nothing more." "And why not?" Karath growled. "Because you don't trust me?" Revan's lip curled in a mocking facsimile of a smile. "No, Admiral, it is because Captain Morvis is rather obviously eavesdropping on our conversation..." here, there was a rustle of activity from the command console as Morvis tried to look busy, "...and because I know you will tell everything I have said to you here to your protégé Lieutenant-Commander Onasi, who will repeat it to his friends, and so the story will spread through the ranks. That, Saul Karath, is why I cannot tell you the whole story." Karath nodded. "I understand, General. Is that all." Revan gave a small smile, a real one this time. "You are a soldier's soldier, Saul Karath. I sense you will be most important in the coming years. Yes, Admiral, that will be all. Malak and I will be leaving the bridge now." Thus saying, the Jedi stalked out. As Karath watched them leave, Morvis walked up to Karath, his face pale. "Did he say he'd do anything to me?" the Captain asked, his mustache twitching. Karath couldn't resist laughing at his aide's discomfort. It felt so good he laughed again. There hadn't been much to laugh about since the start of the Mandalorian Wars. "No, Dallan, there was no vow of retribution. You can live to fight another day." Morvis managed a small half-smile at that. "Good to hear, Saul. Good to hear." **** On the bridge of the Kote, flagship of the Mandalorian armada, Mandalore the Ultimate stood and gazed out the viewport at the unending stream of durasteel- andbeskar-made craft: dreadnaughts, battleships, troopships, dungeon ships, starfighters, and Basilisk war droids almost blotted out the stars. Flanking Mandalore were his two principal aides: one man wore standard Mandalorian Neo-Crusader armor painted gold, with an ammo bandoleer and a pauldron. The other wore silver Mandalorian battle armor with red highlights, and had an oval-shaped helmet with the obligatory T-visor. Mandalore turned. "Su'cuy, ner vode," he said, favoring the two with the informality of his greeting. "You wished to see me?" The silver-armored man stepped forward, removing his helmet as he did so, revealing a dark-skinned face scarred by many, many battles. "Yes, Manda'lor," said Cassus Fett. "Canderous here captured a Jetii during that last skirmish near Althir---" Mandalore interrupted. "Don't try and serve the news on a platter with uj cake, Cassus. I know we lost, and I know we lost bad." Fett winced. "Very well. During the rout, Canderous captured a Jetii who was trying to kill me. The Jetii says there's something brewing over at Malachor V." Mandalore gazed at the second warrior, who had remained silent. "Well, Canderous? You going to let this mirsh'kyramud tell the whole story, or do you have anything to say for yourself?" Canderous Ordo removed his helmet, and gazed at Mandalore. Ever since fighting alongside him in the Sith War, Canderous had been commended time and again by Mandalore the Ultimate, and many considered him to be Mandalore's protégé. Canderous didn't think of it that way. To himself, he was simply a man who had been fighting wars for as long as he could remember, and had gotten very, very, very good at it. "Well, Mand'alor, we were returning to the Kote after the massacre---" here, Mandalore nodded approvingly at Canderous' bluntness, "---when he attacked. He was a young man, couldn't have been older than I was during the Sith War, and we still don't know how he stowed away on our Basilisk without our noticing it, but he did. He attacked when we breached the atmosphere; he had stolen the beskar'gam of one of our warriors, which let him breath in the vacuum. Anyhow, I piloted the droid, Cassus subdued him, and when we got back to the Kote, Bralor made him sing like a jai'galaar." Mandalore nodded. "And what exactly did our Jetii captive say was brewing, Cassus?" The number two man in the Mandalorian Neo-Crusaders shrugged. "Not much. All he knew was that Admiral Sommos' entire fleet has been moved out there, along with several other Jetiise. Why this is happening, he didn't say." Mandalore the Ultimate nodded. "Thank you Cassus, Canderous. Dismissed." The two men walked out, leaving Mandalore with only the bridge crew and his thoughts for company. When Mandalore was sure no one was watching him, he wearily shook his head. When the Dar'jetii had come to him, offering him a fight that would make the Mandalorians feared throughout the galaxy, he had jumped at the opportunity, thinking taking on the Republic would allow him to live up to his legendary predecessor. Mandalore fingered his mask, remembering how he had stumbled across his father's armor in the woods, remembered the sadness, and the exhilaration, that he had felt, knowing that he now led the clans...and that the father he had loved and respected was gone forever. If Mandalore the Ultimate had known what he had been getting into, he would never had started the war. But he hadn't known, the war was on, and it was time for one last throw of the dice. *** There was a rowdy Cheg game in progress when Canderous Ordo walked into the Kote's warrior's lounge, and as such he went unnoticed for at least a minute, no mean feat for a warrior as famous as him. A Mandalorian woman wearing rather tight orange armor at the bar questioningly raised a glass of tihaar upon spotting Canderous, and he experienced a twinge of pain that he hadn't raised a farm and family back on Manda'yaim like so many of his comrades. He shook his head, and instead walked over to the Cheg table, where he had spotted some of his friends. On one side of the Cheg table was Kex, the resident quartermaster of the Kote; Kelborn, one of the few survivors of the massacre on Althir, and a very hard-bitten man; Bralor, a brawny brawler who never backed down from a fight; Xarga, who was rather soft-spoken; and finally Davrel, an ori'atin NCO who had been in every battle of the Mandalorian Wars, and even a few of the Sith War. Kex waved his hand at Canderous as he bashed the puck across the table to land in the opposing team's goal. A shout of "Kandosii!" arose from the lounge denizens. The opposing team was considerably less happy. It consisted of Sherruk, a red-armored Corporal who had taken the gear from Sergeant Koblin, who had been killed during the fight on Taris. Rumors persisted that Sherruk had fragged Koblin himself, but nothing solid had surfaced to prove that theory. Sherruk was cold, arrogant, and somewhat overbearing. His only friends, and his fellow Cheg teammates, were two men by the name of Jarg and Reeza, both of whom looked like shaved Wookiees, but were not nearly as smart. "Foul!" yelled Sherruk in his Coruscanti accent. "You shabla cheated, you chakaare!" Bralor scrambled to his feet. The lounge crowd had fallen silent. "N'jurkad, Sherruk," growled the gold-armored officer. "You still want to call that foul?" Sherruk was no stranger to physical violence, he had killed several Jedi himself, and no coward. But neither would he fight a fellow warrior. Which meant that it was Jarg and Reeza's cue to scramble to their feet and stare menacingly at Bralor. Bralor removed his helmet underneath his helmet, his face was equally hard and cold as the T-visor of his helmet. Jarg and Reeza were unfazed. "Not a fair fight," remarked Kelborn. "You two hairless Wookiees versus Bralor? You don't stand a chance." Sherruk's cronies were as moved by Kelborn's warning, of sorts, as they were by Bralor's threat. Jarg turned to face Reeza, simply said, "Hukaat'kama, Reeza," and lunged towards Bralor, fist cocked. It was a slaughter. Bralor moved fast, pinning Jarg to the Cheg table, and commenced to whale the tar out of him. Bralor interspersed his hand-to-hand practice with comments addressed at Jarg. "Never insult my honor, mir'osik," he remarked, before knocking Jarg out cold. Reeza jumped into the fray, followed in short order by Davrel, who smashed in the end of his tihaar bottle so he could use it as a weapon, and Sherruk, who ignited one of his trophy lightsabers. Everyone else went scrambling for blasters, pistols, vibroswords, and armor-integrated weaponry. Just before complete chaos was about to erupt, a cry of "KE'SUSH!" echoed through the lounge, and Mandalore the Ultimate, flanked by Cassus Fett, strode into the room. "MAND'ALOR!" the assembled warriors barked, snapping to attention. Mandalore walked through the crowd, and stopped in front of Sherruk, who still had his blue lightsaber ignited. "What the fierfek is this?" asked Mandalore. "My lightsaber," replied Sherruk. Mandalore stared at Sherruk for several seconds, then swivelled to face Kex. "Quartermaster, I hear we're running low on supplies, recently." Kex was uncertain of where this line of conversation was going, but he nodded. "Such is a soldier's lot in war, Mand'alor." "Well, I've found a way to cut down." "Mand'alor?" "At Malachor, Sherruk here will be going into battle ures beskar'gam. Do you think you can find a good use for his gear, Kex?" The quartermaster's grin could practically be heard. "Yes, Mand'alor!" "Good. Dismissed, warriors. The battle awaits. Get your beskar'gam on, and get cannoned up. Kote awaits. Oya!" The cry was echoed by the hall of warriors. "OYA!" *** In the officer's lounge of the Leviathan, Lieutenant-Commander Carth Onasi downed a shot from a bottle of lomin-ale, and pondered. The war was going to be over soon, no two ways about it. And if the plan Revan had told Saul proceeded anything like the Jedi had imagined, victory was assured. Revan had yet to lose. Admiral Sommos' fleet was already positioned; Saul was talking to her now via the holocomm. She was worried, but trusted the Jedi's plan. Carth downed another shot of lomin-ale, and was surprised to find himself with a barmate: heretofore the lounge had been empty. Captain Dallan Morvis tugged off his cap, mopped his brow, and downed a bottle of elba beer in a single go. "Good to see you, Carth." "Likewise...Dallan." Morvis chuckled. "We haven't met informally before, have we, Carth." "No sir, no we haven't." Morvis nodded. "Well, let's get acquainted. What're you going to do when this war is over, Carth?" "I dunno, Dallan, I guess I'll get back to my family on Telos IV and try and make a living there." "You have a family?" "Yes, wife, and a son." "What're their names?" "Dustil's my son, he's a headstrong sort, wants to follow me into the Navy. Morgana's my wife, and she's the most beautiful woman I've met, and the smartest as well. You have family, Dallan?" "No, I never found anyone who could tolerate me for the rest of their life." Morvis chuckled. "I guess I'm a little like Admiral Karath in one way: we're both married to our careers." "Dallan...do you think we'll survive this battle." Morvis' face grew grim. "I don't know Carth...I don't know." -----signature----- Honored recepient of Thrawn McEwok's Bronze Thranta™ A Liberal and proud of it "Politics is simply the continuation of war by other means." --Mandalore the Ultimate
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MsLanna Title: CR GSFF Central Registered: Jul '05	Date Posted: 9/5/07 4:56am Subject: RE: A Graveyard in the Making: Mandalorian Wars, with various KotOR characters, up 9/04/07
	"Yes, but I have assigned my best General---" Here Malak emitted a small cough. Revan swivelled his hooded face to shoot his apprentice a placating look, then continued. "My second-best General to assist Admiral Sommos with the attack." Okay, I'm now all eyes for the story... Revan's lip curled in a mocking facsimile of a smile. "No, Admiral, it is because Captain Morvis is rather obviously eavesdropping on our conversation..." here, there was a rustle of activity from the command console as Morvis tried to look busy, again This seems to be real fun. The silver-armored man stepped forward, removing his helmet as he did so, revealing a dark-skinned face scarred by many, many battles. "Yes, Manda'lor," said Cassus Fett. "Canderous here captured a Jetii during that last skirmish near Althir---" Mandalore interrupted. "Don't try and serve the news on a platter with uj cake, Cassus. I know we lost, and I know we lost bad." Fett winced. "Very well. During the rout, Canderous captured a Jetii who was trying to kill me. The Jetii says there's something brewing over at Malachor V." I always like people who are straighforawrd. I like people demanding straightfowradness even more. If Mandalore the Ultimate had known what he had been getting into, he would never had started the war. But he hadn't known, the war was on, and it was time for one last throw of the dice. Aw, poor Mnado. Wanna give him a hug, but that might be letahl. Sherruk here will be going into battle ures beskar'gam. I hope you have no further need of Sherruk... Great start. I hope you have more to back this up? -----signature----- Padawan owned by Corellian_Ale Master of CloneCaptainRex. Proud FanFic Master of Darth_Sathanos Why so serious? Accidentally e-married to sinre?
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Commander5052 Registered: Aug '05	Date Posted: 9/5/07 5:55am Subject: RE: A Graveyard in the Making: Mandalorian Wars, with various KotOR characters, up 9/04/07
	MsLanna posted: "Yes, but I have assigned my best General---" Here Malak emitted a small cough. Revan swivelled his hooded face to shoot his apprentice a placating look, then continued. "My second-best General to assist Admiral Sommos with the attack." Okay, I'm now all eyes for the story... Revan's lip curled in a mocking facsimile of a smile. "No, Admiral, it is because Captain Morvis is rather obviously eavesdropping on our conversation..." here, there was a rustle of activity from the command console as Morvis tried to look busy, again This seems to be real fun. The silver-armored man stepped forward, removing his helmet as he did so, revealing a dark-skinned face scarred by many, many battles. "Yes, Manda'lor," said Cassus Fett. "Canderous here captured a Jetii during that last skirmish near Althir---" Mandalore interrupted. "Don't try and serve the news on a platter with uj cake, Cassus. I know we lost, and I know we lost bad." Fett winced. "Very well. During the rout, Canderous captured a Jetii who was trying to kill me. The Jetii says there's something brewing over at Malachor V." I always like people who are straighforawrd. I like people demanding straightfowradness even more. If Mandalore the Ultimate had known what he had been getting into, he would never had started the war. But he hadn't known, the war was on, and it was time for one last throw of the dice. Aw, poor Mnado. Wanna give him a hug, but that might be letahl. Sherruk here will be going into battle ures beskar'gam. I hope you have no further need of Sherruk... Great start. I hope you have more to back this up? Dang straight I do! Chapter two should be up either today or this weekend (school starts for me tomorrow, which could cut into my writing time. -----signature----- Honored recepient of Thrawn McEwok's Bronze Thranta™ A Liberal and proud of it "Politics is simply the continuation of war by other means." --Mandalore the Ultimate
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Commander5052 Registered: Aug '05	Date Posted: 9/5/07 7:04am Subject: RE: A Graveyard in the Making: Mandalorian Wars, with various KotOR characters, up 9/04/07
	And here it is, Chapter two! Chapter Two: Fleets are Marshalled Saul Karath strode into the holocomm room of the Leviathan, Captain Dallan Morvis on his right, General Revan on his left. "She should have been on by now," the Admiral remarked. Revan shrugged. "Punctuality has never been her strong suit, Admiral Karath." Any further discussion of Fleet Admiral Sommos was brought to an end by the appearance of the Admiral herself, whose hologram flickered to life above the projector. Sommos, as was per usual for her, was blunter than a Gammorean vibro-axe. "The fleet is in position, Revan. We've already received word that the bucketheads are amassing for a strike." The Jedi knight nodded. "Good. Is my General there?" A look of displeasure crossed the Admiral's haggard face. "Yes, she is." "Put her on." Sommos stepped aside to let a woman dressed in Jedi robes enter the holocomm's pickup area. "You have your orders," said Revan. "Yes," said the woman, "yes I do." "Are you ready to execute them to the best of your ability?" This time, the woman hesitated, but she nodded. "Good," said Revan. "Then be prepared." The woman nodded and walked off, and Admiral Sommos stepped onto the holocomm. "General, I'd really appreciate it if---" "I let you know what my plans are? No, Admiral Sommos, this can only be kept to a select few. Dismissed." Thus saying, Revan cut the pickup field, and swivelled to face Karath. "Admiral, get to the bridge. Set course for Malachor V." Karath saluted. "Yes, sir. Right away sir. Come on, Morvis." As they walked to the bridge, Karath noticed Morvis looked a little nervous. "Something wrong, Dallan?" "This plan of Revan's....I'd feel more comfortable if we knew what exactly it was." "At least we know we're going to win this battle, Dallan." "But at what cost, Saul? At what cost?" By now, they had reached the bridge. Karath stared out the viewport, wishing he had an answer to Morvis' question. *** On the bridge of the Kote, an air of battle was present as Cassus Fett performed the systems check. "Helm?" "Ready!" "Sensors?" "Ready!" "Gunnery?" "Ready!" And so it went. By the time Mandalore the Ultimate walked onto the bridge, the check had been completed, and all stations were operational. Fett, spotting his leader, walked up and saluted. "We're ready to roll, Mand'alor." "Oya, then," Mandalore remarked dryly. "Something wrong, Mand'alor?" asked Cassus. "Just remembering another battle like this." "Dxun?" "Yes. I still remember finding this mask..." Cassus had served during the Sith War as well, and he placed his hand on Mandalore's shoulder. The Taung warlord didn't shake it off. "Udesii, Mand'alor, udesii. You're twice, no three times the Mand'alor your buir was. You'll lead us to kote. I know it." Mandalore looked at Cassus. "Maybe Cassus, but I still can't shake the feeling we shouldn't go to Malachor. It's taboo for a reason." Further discussion was interrupted by the arrival of Canderous Ordo. "The Beskad and the Aden'la have reported. Fleet Solus is ready to go, Mand'alor." Mandalore snorted, and when you're a Taung, that gesture is all the more expressive. "Set course, then. Oya!" The bridge crew took up the cry, but Mandalore's melancholiness was catching: none of them really had their heart in it. "OYA!" The Kote jumped to hyperspace, followed shortly by the rest of the fleet, and prepared for battle. *** In the warrior's lounge of the Kote, the infantry prepared themselves for combat the only way they knew how: glasses of alcohol, and drinking songs. "Buy'ce gal, buy'ce tal, vebor'ad ures aliit. Mhi draar baat'i meg'parjii'se, kote lo'shebs'ul narit." Kex wiped some vestiges of tihaar from his face. Walking over to the bar, he spotted a female warrior in orange armor who looked a little unsteady. "Copaani gaan?" asked the quartermaster. The woman stiffened, and took off her helmet. Underneath was a high-cheekboned face with fiery red hair. "No, Kex, I think I'm fine." Kex gulped, thankful the gesture was hidden behind his helmet. "S-sorry, Mira. Didn't know it was you." Mira chuckled. "Udesii, Kex, udesii. It's okay." The quartermaster was relieved. Hit on Mira in a bad mood, and beskar'gam wouldn't be enough to protect you. "You think we'll make it out of this one alive?" Sergeant Davrel plunked himself down next to Kex at the bar. "I know three people who won't," he said, gesturing over to one man wearing only fatigues, flanked by two blue-armored men: Sherruk, Jarg, and Reeza. Kex chuckled. "Now there's someone who's going to kyr'amur." "Some three more like," interjected Bralor, who sat down next to Mira. "If the Reps don't kill him, I'll do it myself." Kelborn sat down next to Bralor. "Why are we all at the bar?" "Good question," replied Kex. "There's a table over there." The five got up and moved over to the table, joined in short order by Xarga. The soft-spoken warrior initiated the conversation. "Think we'll kyr'amur on this one?" "More like as not," Mira said. "The Reps are throwing everything but the kitchen sink at us, which makes for a rather high casualty rate." She grabbed Xarga's lomin-ale bottle and proceeded to chug it, causing everyone else to either look away or stare. Mira slammed the bottle down and grinned. "What, never seen anyone chug a lomin-ale before?" "N-not like that," said Kex. Mira chuckled. "Mando'ade or no, men are the same the galaxy over. If you'll excuse me..." After Mira left, Kelborn sighed. "The fact all of us---" here, Xarga coughed, "---okay, all of us except for Xarga have families and farms on Manda'yaim makes it even worse." "You think she doesn't know that?" retorted Kex. "It's her own little way of having fun." Any further discussion of Mira was put to an end by a cry of "KE'SUSH!" The fivesome stood to stiff attention as Canderous Ordo walked into the lounge. "All right, ner vode. Happy hour's over. Stow the drinks, and put on your beskar'gam. Except you, Sherruk." There was laughter at this last bit. "We're arriving at Malachor V in one hour, and Mandalore wants everyone ready. Let's move, people!" The lounge became a fluster of activity as helmets were jammed on, armor systems activated, weapons were checked, and men and woemn prepared for battle. Over the helmet comlink, a voice Kex couldn't identify shouted, "Hey, Esok! Sing for us, would you, ner vod?" The Mandalorian named Esok happily obliged. He had a fine bass, well suited to the song he belted out. "Bal kote....darasuum kote...." Kex found himself joining in, "Jor'so ran....kando a tome...sa kyr'am nau tracyn...kad, vode an." It was therpeutic, in a way. Kex chuckled. If those in the galaxy who feared the Mandalorians knew they geared themselves up for battle by singing...well, some secrets were best left untold. -----signature----- Honored recepient of Thrawn McEwok's Bronze Thranta™ A Liberal and proud of it "Politics is simply the continuation of war by other means." --Mandalore the Ultimate
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MandoJedi Registered: Aug '07	Date Posted: 9/5/07 8:22am Subject: RE: A Graveyard in the Making: Mandalorian Wars, with various KotOR characters, up 9/04/07
	Great description of Mandalorians is what I liked the most in this fic. The story is pretty good so far aslo. Let me know, when you write anoter chapter please. -----signature----- Aliit ori'shya tal'din.
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w-righter Registered: Jun '07	Date Posted: 9/5/07 8:46am Subject: RE: A Graveyard in the Making: Mandalorian Wars, with various KotOR characters, up 9/04/07
	Very good beginning! Add me to the PM list as well. -----signature----- KotOR Comics: where impossible things may happen! Ithorian -- with a GUN!?
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Commander-DWH Registered: Nov '03	Date Posted: 9/5/07 2:23pm Subject: RE: A Graveyard in the Making: Mandalorian Wars, with various KotOR characters, up 9/04/07
	Hey! Great to see another KOTOR writer. I must say, this is one of the better KOTOR fics I've read. Frequently, stories that detail background we're given in the game are trite rehashes, with no depth and little personality. I am quite happy to see that this is not one of those stories. I love the Mando scenes- they show a depth of knowledge of the culture without being dry as an encyclopedia. Also, I have a soft spot for Canderous. Ahhh, Admiral Karath. Looking all smart in his shiny new uniform, I'm sure. Though I know exactly where this is going (look ma! I played the game!), I am definitely looking forward to more. Great work! P.S. You should check out the KOTOR Index, since it's in need of some love and new blood. Hope to see you there! -----signature----- Complements (KOTOR)- http://boards.theforce.net/before_the_saga/b10475/21177927/ Luminosity- http://boards.theforce.net/before_the_saga/b10475/27900517/ Barefoot hippie in the OC revolution Master of the lovely and talented SoA
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Jedi_Drizzt Registered: Nov '06	Date Posted: 9/5/07 2:37pm Subject: RE: A Graveyard in the Making: Mandalorian Wars, with various KotOR characters, up 9/04/07
	Interesting start. -----signature----- "What hope might we find if we know all of the answers?" Drizzt Do'Urden
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MsLanna Title: CR GSFF Central Registered: Jul '05	Date Posted: 9/7/07 6:23am Subject: RE: A Graveyard in the Making: Mandalorian Wars, with various KotOR characters, up 9/04/07
	Good, more of this. rubs her hands bucketheads My sentiment exactly. Sommos stepped aside to let a woman dressed in Jedi robes enter the holocomm's pickup area. "You have your orders," said Revan. "Yes," said the woman, "yes I do." "Are you ready to execute them to the best of your ability?" This time, the woman hesitated, but she nodded. "Good," said Revan. "Then be prepared." This is a great dialouge and wonderfully foreshadowing. Can't wait to see what her orders are. In the warrior's lounge of the Kote, the infantry prepared themselves for combat the only way they knew how: glasses of alcohol, and drinking songs. I always wonder, how can they fight when drunk? Reflexes are below optimum, so is coordination and all sensory input. Is that, what the armour is for? Replacing the wits gone drinking? Or even worse, do they have to fight with a hangover. They might need their bucket/hemlets for other uses then. If those in the galaxy who feared the Mandalorians knew they geared themselves up for battle by singing...well, some secrets were best left untold. Makes you wanna give the big guys a hug. But they needn't worry, it's a common thing here and now, the meaner you are (supposed to be) the more you got to rhyme. points at rappers -----signature----- Padawan owned by Corellian_Ale Master of CloneCaptainRex. Proud FanFic Master of Darth_Sathanos Why so serious? Accidentally e-married to sinre?
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Kenobi_Kid Registered: May '05	Date Posted: 9/7/07 1:57pm Subject: RE: A Graveyard in the Making: Mandalorian Wars, with various KotOR characters, up 9/04/07 - Date Edited: 9/7/07 1:58pm (1 edits total) Edited By: Kenobi_Kid
	Hey CC. I made it. Your story seems to be taking shape well, with an interesting look at both the Mando and Republic sides. In particular I was pleased to see not only both Canderous Ordo and Cassus Fett in the first chapter (How many fics can boast that?) but a big chunk of the Mandos from KOTOR II (which I recently finished playing as a light-side male Exile. I luv Visas BTW.) So anyway, the Mando goodness in this is pretty cool so far, plus a Dramatis personae list is always awesome I can’t write up a review but I’ll highlight some of the parts that caught my eye in particular. "Yes, but I have assigned my best General---" Here Malak emitted a small cough. Revan swivelled his hooded face to shoot his apprentice a placating look, then continued. "My second-best General to assist Admiral Sommos with the attack." This really made me laugh, especially because I think that it’s true. Malak was never Revan’s match, but the Exile came close. Revan's lip curled in a mocking facsimile of a smile. "No, Admiral, it is because Captain Morvis is rather obviously eavesdropping on our conversation..." here, there was a rustle of activity from the command console as Morvis tried to look busy Revan seems vaguely Darth Vaderish in this exchange, but there’s an extra layer of.......Revan-ness to it that helps distance to the two. Revan merely alerts Morvis that he’s aware of his eavesdropping, whereas Vader probably would’ve strangled the guy for not minding his own business. Rumors persisted that Sherruk had fragged Koblin himself, but nothing solid had surfaced to prove that theory. Sherruk was cold, arrogant, and somewhat overbearing. His only friends, and his fellow Cheg teammates, were two men by the name of Jarg and Reeza, both of whom looked like shaved Wookiees, but were not nearly as smart. This entire passage is an excellent one, displaying the diversity in ethics and temperment between the Mandalorians as well as throwing a great humorous descriptive. (Hairless wookies. Heh.) I also liked how Mandalore dealt with the incident. Sending a warrior in without his armor? Cold. Aside from loving the inclusion of Mira and her interactions with Kex (How much did it suck that she wasn’t a romantic interest in the game?) I don’t have as much to say about the second chapter...yet, but I love how it ends with the Mandos going into battle singing. Overall this story is intriguing and displays a more detailed style of storytelling then your previous works (Though granted, I’ve only read Band of Vat-Brothers) and I’ll definitely be sticking around for the payoff. -KK -----signature----- High Prophet of the Church of Kyle and loyal suitor of HIH Marasiah Fel Star Wars: Now with 100% more Lyle Waggoner! Lick enough wallpaper and eventually you will find the Snozzberry I have seen the enemy and he is you
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Commander5052 Registered: Aug '05	Date Posted: 12/15/07 1:37pm Subject: RE: A Graveyard in the Making: Mandalorian Wars, with various KotOR characters, up 9/04/07
	What's this? A new chapter? Yes, it is! Enjoy, folks! Chapter three: Lines are Drawn The Leviathan, along with the four Hammerhead-class corvettes accompanying it, decanted from hyperspace just outside the Malachor system. The ships immediately spread out in a V-formation, with the Leviathan on point, readying themselves for battle. On the far side of the Malachor system, Mandalore the Ultimate deployed a small scout unit, comprised of two dreadnaughts, to the location where Battlegroup Leviathan had just arrived at. The bloodiest battle of the Mandalorian War was about to begin. *** On the bridge of the Mandalorian dreadnaught Darasuum Kote, Mandalorian Captain Mal Krevorsh surveyed the area. Krevorsh was not renowned throughout the Neo-Crusaders for his observantness, and as such managed to overlook Battlegroup Leviathan for a full minute. The Leviathan fixed that problem, loosing a salvo of cannon fire towards the Mandalorian dreadnaughts. The bridge rumbled as shots slammed into the dreadnaught. Captain Krevorsh scrambled to his feet, shoving aside his aide, who had fallen on top of him. "What the fierfek was that?" "Republic battlegroup, Sir! They're trying to flank us!" yelled the sensor officer. "Number and type?" "Four Hammerheads, one Interdictor!" "Gunnery, blow the di'kute to dar'yaim! Do it! [/i]Now![/i]" The batteries of the dreadnaughts blazed to life, launching streaks of coherent light at the Republic craft. The enemy battlegroup hove about, incredibly maintaining formation, and continued to launch turbolaser fire at the dreadnaughts. A sudden cry sounded over the comlink. "What was that??" asked Krevorsh. "The Kad, Captain. She's gone." Krevorsh swore. "What's our status? Can we take them on?" The operations officer looked up, and shook his head. Krevorsh's eyes widened. "There's no dishonor in running from a fight you cannot win. Helm, bring us about. All shields aft. Gunnery, blind fire aft to keep them occupied. Nav, set course back to the fleet." Immediately after the barrage of orders, the bridge of the Darasuum Kote shook. The captain snapped his head over to face the operations officer. The man shook his head grimly. "Engines are down to 60%, all guns aft of the midline have been taken out, and they're gaining on us." Krevorsh gritted his teeth. "Helm, give the engines everything you've got. Nav, where's that solution!?" The navigator looked up. "Working on it, Sir! We've got a minute till the navicomp gets the coordinates." "Captain!" yelled the operations officer. "Our shields are down. Hull integrity is down to 15%!" Krevorsh rounded on the helmsman. "Blind jump! Get us out of here! NOW!!" The Mandalorian officer's only reply was a roaring noise, a sudden sense of heat, and then coolth, and then silence. * Saul Karath gazed out at the expanding debris of the two Mandalorian dreadnaughts, then swivelled to face the man he had heard walk up behind him. "Two Mandies, General," said the Admiral. "They're dead now, but this'll delay us from meeting up with Admiral Sommos' fleet." "No matter," replied Revan. "She can take care of herself, and if not...my plan ought to more than compensate." "That plan of yours again," Karath growled. "Still not telling what it is?" Revan gave a small little half-smile. "No, Admiral. Not yet. Not yet. Set course for Malachor V. The real battle awaits." * On the bridge of the Kote, Mandalore the Ultimate gazed out the viewport at the armada under his command. So many cruisers, fighters, and other vessels were in formation that the stars could barely be glimpsed. So many, and yet, against the Jedi, just how much would numbers count for? Mandalore didn't know. Moreover, he didn't want to know. He just wanted to get the fight over with. Cassus walked onto the bridge, and snapped off a precise salute. "We're set, Mand'alor." Mandalore looked at Canderous, who was bending over the shoulder of the comms officer. "Well?" asked the Taung warlord. "Yep," said Canderous. "Time to give the Jetiise their money's worth." "Hype us out, then," said Mandalore. "Set course for Malachor V." "Oya," remarked Cassus. "Oya," echoed Mandalore, wondering just how badly this gamble would cost him. -----signature----- Honored recepient of Thrawn McEwok's Bronze Thranta™ A Liberal and proud of it "Politics is simply the continuation of war by other means." --Mandalore the Ultimate
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MsLanna Title: CR GSFF Central Registered: Jul '05	Date Posted: 12/18/07 5:52am Subject: RE: A Graveyard in the Making: Mandalorian Wars, with various KotOR characters, updated 12/15/07
	Seems that the first battle was not difficult to win. Let's hope it stays that way. An I get more and more worried about those secret plans and orders. -----signature----- Padawan owned by Corellian_Ale Master of CloneCaptainRex. Proud FanFic Master of Darth_Sathanos Why so serious? Accidentally e-married to sinre?
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MandoJedi Registered: Aug '07	Date Posted: 12/31/07 9:09am Subject: RE: A Graveyard in the Making: Mandalorian Wars, with various KotOR characters, updated 12/15/07
	Good action writing. Loved the update! -----signature----- Aliit ori'shya tal'din.
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Jedi_Drizzt Registered: Nov '06	Date Posted: 1/6 6:32am Subject: RE: A Graveyard in the Making: Mandalorian Wars, with various KotOR characters, updated 12/15/07
	I loved the action. Very nice update! -----signature----- "What hope might we find if we know all of the answers?" Drizzt Do'Urden
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Commander5052 Registered: Aug '05	Date Posted: 1/7 2:51pm Subject: RE: A Graveyard in the Making: Mandalorian Wars, with various KotOR characters, updated 12/15/07 - Date Edited: 1/7 2:54pm (1 edits total) Edited By: Commander5052
	Two chapters up in two months! I'm on a roll here, people! WARNING: Spoiler for the KOTOR comics inside! Chapter Four: The Battle Begins Saul Karath gazed out at the Republic fleet arrayed around Malachor V. Interdictor cruisers, Hammerhead cruisers, Correllian-made blockade runners, and even a few of the old Inexpungable-class command ships were arrayed in formation around the planet. Heading up the fleet was the cruiser Swiftsure, Admiral Noma Sommos's personal command ship. Morvis walked up to Karath, mustache twitching, and saluted. "Report from the scoutships, Admiral. The Mandies have entered hyperspace." Karath nodded. At the helmsman's seat, Lieutenant Onasi looked at the Admiral questioningly. Karath shot a quick grin at his protégé, and swivelled to face Morvis. "Get Admiral Sommos on the holocomm, let her know. And where are our illustrious Generals?" "Right here, Admiral," came the voice of Malak. The bald-headed Knight and his master were standing right behind Karath. Karath winced. "Generals, the Mandies have---" "Entered hyperspace?" interrupted Revan. "Yes. We know. Admiral Sommos is already arraying the fleet, Admiral. You should be receiving your orders around---" The comms officer interrupted. "Admiral Karath, Admiral Sommos wants us to head up the vanguard of the fleet!" "---Now," finished Revan, a small, self-satisfied smile on his bland face. Karath gritted his teeth. "Lieutenant Onasi, move us into position! Comms, contact the rest of our task force, have them do the same." Karath turned to face Revan. "You may bloody well be the Republic's last hope, Revan," the Admiral growled. "But don't think you can play games with me. The same goes for you...Squint." Malak's eyes narrowed, and he reached for his saber hilt. Revan placed a hand on Malak's arm, and took a step towards Karath. The Admiral unconciously took a step back. "Don't presume to dictate to me or my apprentice, Admiral," said Revan. His voice was calm, but the smile was gone from his face, and his eyes were cold and hard. Karath's heart was pounding, but the Admiral had a reputation to keep up with amongst his crew. "You don't dictate to me either, General. Last I checked our ranks were---gah!" Karath was cut off by a sudden tightning of his throat. He brushed his hand against his throat to see if he could remove whatever it was that was choking him. When he found nothing, he glared vibroblades at Revan. "Let---me---go!" Revan furrowed his brow. "It's not---oh. Malak, would you be so kind as to let the Admiral go? It wouldn't be very good to have him incapacitated during the battle." Malak gritted his teeth, but released his Force chokehold."Yes, Master." That was when the Leviathan's combat alert sounded, and Morvis straightened from the main tactical display, eyes wild and face red. "Admiral, the bucketheads have come to play!" Karath swivelled to face his second-in-command. "Sound general quarters, Morvis. All shields forward. Gunnery, open fire, tell the rest of our task force to do the same." "Sir!" bellowed the comms officer. "Signal from the Swiftsure: all ships are to attack!" "Here goes, then," said Karath. "Let's hope we make it out alive." *** On the bridge of the Kote, the helmsman's countdown to hyperspace reversion was like the beat of a war drum. "Reversion in three, two, one...oya!" The Mandalorian fleet slipped out of hyperspace, and into battle. Cassus Fett was in his element. "All shields up! Helm, continue on our current bearing, roll us so damage is spread out. Gunnery, find Admiral Sommos's flagship and blast her to dar'yaim!" Canderous was broadcasting orders to the infantry. "Everyone to the troop carriers! Launch on my command, and head for the Republic command ships!" And Mandalore stared. Stared out the viewport at the massive Republic fleet that had the numbers of the Mandalorian fleet. Stared at the planet that he knew would be the location of his last stand. And stared at the face that had suddenly coalesced into existence in the stars outside. "I know you can hear me, Mandalore," the face said. "You might not be force-sensitive, but I've been more than successful at imposing my visions on others." Mandalore knew who it was. "What do you want, Jetii?" Revan's apparition smiled. "To make you an offer, Mandalore. Your fleet will lose this fight, as will you. But if you want an honorable death, I will be waiting." Mandalore's brow furrowed. He began to speak a reply, but the vision disappeared. Cassus swivelled away from the tactical console to face Mandalore. "Mand'alor, we've engaged the Republic fleet. They're trying to encircle us, but we're attempting to break through their lines in the direction of Malachor---Mandalore, are you okay?" Mandalore slowly nodded. "I...am fine, Cassus." Even without his helmet, Fett looked unconvinced. "As you say, Mand'alor." The communications officer shouted out, "We just lost the Kad, Mand'alor! Their assault shuttles managed to escape before she blew." "Give them landing vectors for our hangars," said Mandalore. "And keep fighting. We can't afford to lose ships this early." *** On the bridge of the Leviathan, Carth Onasi watched in fascinated horror as the Mandalorian fleet engaged the Republic armada. Ships were exploding like crazy, with new ones coming to fill the gap every minute. "Carth!" yelled Admiral Karath. "Bring us about to point three-eight, roll us as you go!" Carth complied, simaltaneously sneaking a look at Lieutenant Cede's tactical display. Admiral Sommos had deployed the Republic fleet in a bowl formation, attempting to encircle the Mandalorians. It was a sound strategy, and no one would have balked, save for one person. Revan. The General was on the holocomm with Sommos. "I said no, Admiral, and I meant it. Split the fleet into two groups, let the Mandies drive down the center. Admiral Karath will take his task force to the rear, you sandwich yours between the Mandies and Malachor V." Sommos looked horrified. "We can't do that Revan, that's---" "In compliance with the plans my General and myself have established? Yes, of course it is." Sommos looked pained. "Yes, General." As soon as Sommos signed off, Revan looked at Morvis. "You should be receiving new orders now, Captain." Morvis's mustached twitched. "Yes, General. Admiral Karath! New orders from Admiral Sommos!" "What?" said Karath, bringing up the new battle plan on his datapad. "WHAT? General---" "Do it, Admiral." Karath looked pained. "Carth, bring us about to point one-one. Comms, signal the fleet to follow us." Carth did so, praying Revan's plan would work. *** In the hangar bay of the Kote, Captain Kex and his infantry squad scrambled into their assault shuttle, waiting for the signal to go. "Weapons and armor check!" barked the quartermaster. "We don't anything blowing up during our boarding action." Bralor, Davrel, Xarga, Kelborn, Sherruk, Jarg, and Reeza all did so, Sherruk looking rather pained when he reached for armor controls that weren't there. Kex had been very strict in carrying out Mand'alor's orders. "What's our status, Sir?" asked Bralor. "Dunno yet," replied Kex, "Canderous wants us to hold here until we get the command to launch. Speaking of which, why don't you take the controls, Xarga?" The youngish soldier did so, silently adjusting the controls to his preference. A voice crackled over Kex's comlink. "Kex, this is Ergeron. We just got the order to launch. You coming with?" Kex frowned. "No, we didn't get the order." "Sorry to hear that. ner vod. I'll see you on the other side!" Kex frowned as his friend cut the link. Hopefully they would get the order soon. He didn't want to miss out on this fight. -----signature----- Honored recepient of Thrawn McEwok's Bronze Thranta™ A Liberal and proud of it "Politics is simply the continuation of war by other means." --Mandalore the Ultimate
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Kenobi_Kid Registered: May '05	Date Posted: 1/23 1:55pm Subject: RE: A Graveyard in the Making: Mandalorian Wars, with various KotOR characters, updated 12/15/07
	Hey CC! Sorry that I missed the past two chapters but I'll get to reviewing them ASAP. For starters, though I'll just ad that it's a thrill to see so many characters from both KOTOR 1 and 2 given a role here and being fleshed out a little. Nothing wrong with a little fanon now and then. -----signature----- High Prophet of the Church of Kyle and loyal suitor of HIH Marasiah Fel Star Wars: Now with 100% more Lyle Waggoner! Lick enough wallpaper and eventually you will find the Snozzberry I have seen the enemy and he is you
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