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Topic:
Eclipse of the Force ***Updated and Complete 9/1***
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RX_Sith
Registered:
Mar '06
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Date Posted:
2/6 5:58am
Subject:
Eclipse of the Force ***Updated and Complete 9/1***
- Date Edited:
9/1 12:21pm (11 edits total)
Edited By:
RX_Sith
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Title: Eclipse of the Force
Author: RX_Sith
Genre: Challenge, EU
Notes: This is a fic for the Dare Challenge .
My Dare was: To write something about the origin of the Jedi, as in, going back as far as the first "Force Sensitive" being. How they came to this knowledge, and dealt with their new powers.
Eclipse of the Force
Deep within the galactic core of the galaxy a mysterious planet called Eclipse was hidden within a huge asteroid field. It was a small, tiny world that had been fractured after eons from multiple collisions from the asteroids that hid its existence.
Mada looked upon her fragile hands that crinkled when she moved them. She was a slender built woman who was a mere child on the fractured world that she lived on. Because of the constant collision from the asteroid field that encircled the planet very few citizens made it past the age of thirty.
Long ago, the Sensi, as her race was called constructed their entire environment deep with the crust of the violent world. The landscape was heavily cratered and few ventured out for fear that another asteroid would hit their world causing massive destruction to the environment.
Few Sensi had ever seen the outside world. It had a long time ago become a reality for anyone to spend more than a few minutes on the harsh surface. Numerous Sensi had perished due to an asteroid smashing into the planet. Laws were made to ensure that no one could venture onto the surface of Eclipse.
Each time another asteroid impacted on the planet, the lives of the Sensi were thrown into chaos. Numerous times they had to dig deeper and deeper into the crust to be safe from the violent shifting that occurred after each impact.
Mada and her family had moved their home almost weekly and she never experienced a true, permanent home. She had lived in her current surroundings for five days so far. The Sensi lived as a nomadic society because of the constant turmoil that ravaged their planet.
They had no other choice but to live a lifestyle where possessions were just the clothes and a few other small items that they kept on their person. No one had a home, they just lived in deep crystalline pockets that were carved out from the multiple impacts on the surface.
A strange ability had emerged to the Sensi that they used to foresee when they had to once again move before their little pocket of life ceased to exist. Mada and a few others had the power to sense the time and place that the next asteroid would hit the planet.
She was sensing with her particular aptitude and told her family, "The time has come again to move to a different location." Once she announced that her mother, father, and other sister gathered their few belongings and prepared to once again move.
Another asteroid impacted the planet's surface an hour after she and her family had uprooted their temporary home. It destroyed the prior pocket that they had once lived. She then felt another strange disturbance and another asteroid collided behind their current progress deeper into the subsurface of the planet.
"Our lives will never be normal, will they?" Mada questioned her mother Veron. "No, my child, " Veron replied, "It is the way of our society. If only we could use your premonitions to find a permanent home. But, alas, that will never occur."
"I am sorry mother," Mada replied remorselessly, "I do sense each impact before it happens. I only wish that I could stop the constant uprooting that everyone has to endure."
"It would truly be a blessing if that could ever happen," Veron stated, "But I fear that our society is doomed to extinction if the asteroids continue to make us go deeper and deeper into the crust of our world. Sooner or later, we will have reached the end of our progress."
Mada just somberly walked along with the rest of her family to their newest location. "We will be safe here, but only for three days," Mada announced.
"Then that will be three days that we can at least enjoy what we have," her father, Hesu stated trying to uplift her emotions.
"Three days is better than one," her sister, Nata mentioned, "We might as well enjoy it while we can."
Mada froze again, "No, I have a sense that within a month that we will have gone as far as we can go. I am sorry, but I see everyone dying very soon."
"Calm now," Veron stated as the family huddled together, "We have no control over the fate of our lives. But, we must continue on, until we are left with no choice but to stay and await our final outcome."
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VaderLVR64
Title: Fan Fic Manager in Combat Boots
Registered:
Feb '04
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Date Posted:
2/6 7:06am
Subject:
RE: Eclipse of the Force (Dare Challenge Entry)
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An interesting challenge, and you have done it justice!
"Then that will be three days that we can at least enjoy what we have," her father, Hesu stated trying to uplift her emotions.
"Three days is better than one," her sister, Nata mentioned, "We might as well enjoy it while we can."
Mada froze again, "No, I have a sense that within a month that we will have gone as far as we can go. I am sorry, but I see everyone dying very soon."
"Calm now," Veron stated as the family huddled together, "We have no control over the fate of our lives. But, we must continue on, until we are left with no choice but to stay and await our final outcome
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If you have to choose between tears and laughter, remember that laughter burns more calories.
Proud New Army Mom - off to bootcamp!
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KELIA
Title: Moderator: Fan Fiction
Registered:
Jul '05
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Date Posted:
2/6 7:45am
Subject:
RE: Eclipse of the Force (Dare Challenge Entry)
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That was so sad!
Mada and a few others had the power to sense the time and place that the next asteroid would hit the planet
I'm glad Mada, at least, was able to keep her family safe for as long as she did...and they were able to enjoy their last days together.
Great response to the challenge
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Meredith_Kenobi
Registered:
Jul '05
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Date Posted:
2/6 3:49pm
Subject:
RE: Eclipse of the Force (Dare Challenge Entry)
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Oh, wow! What a very interesting culture and situation you've created. The life of a Sensi person seems very hard.
The ending was rather dis-heatreneing.  I wonder what happens to them? Do a few of them escape their doom, perhaps? 
Very nice response to your challenge, RX_Sith!
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Proud to be ZaraValinor's Padawan  Delighted to be brodiew's Master 
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Healer_Leona
Registered:
Jul '00
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Date Posted:
2/9 6:44am
Subject:
RE: Eclipse of the Force (Dare Challenge Entry)
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Mada froze again, "No, I have a sense that within a month that we will have gone as far as we can go. I am sorry, but I see everyone dying very soon."
Oh my! So sad to see things like this.
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Still crazy after all these years.
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Golden_Jedi
Registered:
Jun '05
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Date Posted:
2/25 3:35am
Subject:
RE: Eclipse of the Force (Dare Challenge Entry)
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"No, I have a sense that within a month that we will have gone as far as we can go. I am sorry, but I see everyone dying very soon."
And still, somehow, someone survived, right?
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The country is that place where chickens walk around uncooked - Julio Cortázar Unexpected Blossom http://boards.theforce.net/beyond_the_saga/b10477/28693266 Sailing Little Boats http://boards.theforce.net/beyond_the_saga/b10477/28747916
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SUGARBANTJINN
Registered:
Apr '07
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Date Posted:
2/26 2:57pm
Subject:
RE: Eclipse of the Force (Dare Challenge Entry)
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this is tense! I love it! I hope Mada learns how to tap into the Force and work with it for real!
WIll someone find them soon, and transport them offplanet to saftey?
MORE!! MORE!!!
if you have a PM list, can you put me on it, please? 
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 Bant and Jonny. Forever one. Two hearts entwined God's Will will not take us to a place where His Grace will not carry us. Padawan Sunkisser 288days O my, my this here Anakin guy Maybe Vader someday later, Now he's just a small fry!
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amidalachick
Registered:
Aug '03
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Date Posted:
3/12 8:28pm
Subject:
RE: Eclipse of the Force (Dare Challenge Entry)
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"Then that will be three days that we can at least enjoy what we have," her father, Hesu stated trying to uplift her emotions.
Awww. Very poignant and unique response to your challenge!
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"Just dance, gonna be okay..."
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RX_Sith
Registered:
Mar '06
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Date Posted:
3/31 10:06pm
Subject:
RE: Eclipse of the Force (Dare Challenge Entry)
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VaderLVR64: Thank you... It was a very hard challenge and I am glad that you enjoyed it.
KELIA: Yes, their lives are very sad indeed.
Meredith_Kenobi: Yes, their culture is very interesting. Never being able to live in one place more than a few days... always moving... with only Mada as their guide as to where to go next.
Healer_Leona: yes, it is very unfortunate that their lives may end soon.
Golden_Jedi: Maybe... maybe not...
SUGARBANTJINN: Well... I wasn't originally going to write anymore about it... but with today being MMM (Monday Mush Mania) day, I will post some more.
amidalachick: Yes, their culture is very unique and quite nomadic.
And now, I will post an update along with the latest MMM challenge... write a NON-ROMANTIC mush fic. Examples of non-romantic mush could be scenes between: a parent and child, siblings or friends. As always, you do not have to follow the challenge in order to participate.
It was the third day of living in their new pocket within their homeworld of Eclipse. Mara and her family were getting ready to move again because another asteroid would be hitting the planet causing their crystalline pocket to rupture.
"Mother," Mara moaned, "Remember my warning that we would not be able to live for more than a month here."
"Yes," Veron replied hugging her child trying to calm her, "But as I stated before, we do not have any control on the outcome of our society. If we are to perish, then we must enjoy the time that we have left."
"Mother," Mara gulped, "What if there was a way that we could avoid our extinction?"
"There is no way child," Veron answered remorsely, "If this is the last time that we can move to a safe location, then we will huddle together and await our outcome."
"But..." Mara was about to rebuke... "Oh my... We need to move now... quickly..."
Mara, Veron, her father Hesu, and her sister Nata rushed out of the enclave that had been there home for the last three days. A few minutes later an asteroid slammed into the planet's surface.
Nata stumbled and fell behind the others. "Help me," she cried as a huge fracture in the crust rushed towards her. Her father Hesu raced back towards his youngest daughter. "Quick, grab my hands," he shouted as he reached out for her.
She was holding on to the edge of the precipice that had now formed from the asteroid impact. She felt her hold slipping. "I can't reach you Father!" she hollered as she slipped a little bit closer to the huge gaping hole beneath her. The precipice moved even further out of the reach of Hesu. He decided he had no other choice but to jump up to the top. He leaped with all of his might and luckily grabbed hold of the top of the crumbling foundation.
He reached out and grabbed his youngest daughter into his arms. "You're safe now, Nata," he told her trying to calm her emotions. "Father... oh Father... Thank you for rescuing me," Nata cried out to him. He looked and saw that now the distance between where a safe spot was and their location was too much of a distance for them to make.
"Veron!" he shouted... "I love you!" he shouted as the precipice crumbled closer to the edge of the giant chasm. "Hesu!" Veron bellowed back, "I love you too!" She and Mara cried as they watched Hesu and Nata finally fall into the void.
"NOOOOOO!" Mara yelled as she tried to run towards her father and sister, but Veron quickly yanked her towards her. "It is not our time yet," she eased her daughters' fears, "I love you, Mata," she cried through her tears as she held Mara close to her. "I love you too, Mother," Mara sobbed.
They remained by the gaping hole as if awaiting their fate to join their family. Time to them was now frozen like their emotions... only to be thawed by falling into the void to reclaim their departed family.
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Golden_Jedi
Registered:
Jun '05
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Date Posted:
4/1 7:43am
Subject:
RE: Eclipse of the Force (Updated 3/31 for MMM Response)
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I think this leaned more toward drama than mush, but, boy, it was intense!
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The country is that place where chickens walk around uncooked - Julio Cortázar Unexpected Blossom http://boards.theforce.net/beyond_the_saga/b10477/28693266 Sailing Little Boats http://boards.theforce.net/beyond_the_saga/b10477/28747916
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KELIA
Title: Moderator: Fan Fiction
Registered:
Jul '05
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Date Posted:
4/2 1:13pm
Subject:
RE: Eclipse of the Force (Updated 3/31 for MMM Response)
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That was brutal.
I admire Mara and her mother's clam to just stand there and await death. I couldn't do it.
Great update
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Healer_Leona
Registered:
Jul '00
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Date Posted:
4/5 4:20am
Subject:
RE: Eclipse of the Force (Updated 3/31 for MMM Response)
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Oh no, how tragic.
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Still crazy after all these years.
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Jade_Max
Registered:
Jun '02
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Date Posted:
4/10 6:53am
Subject:
RE: Eclipse of the Force (Updated 3/31 for MMM Response)
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Golden_Jedi posted:
I think this leaned more toward drama than mush, but, boy, it was intense!
Yeah... I'm inclined to agree... on all counts! Intense is right, nice job!
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You'll Like me when I'm Dead - V/P Dark Drama - http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/29236355 Don't think, write. And have faith that your subconscious mind is smarter than you.- lazy RIP my little Nibbler
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VaderLVR64
Title: Fan Fic Manager in Combat Boots
Registered:
Feb '04
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Date Posted:
4/14 4:22am
Subject:
RE: Eclipse of the Force (Updated 3/31 for MMM Response)
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They remained by the gaping hole as if awaiting their fate to join their family. Time to them was now frozen like their emotions... only to be thawed by falling into the void to reclaim their departed family.
It's not nice to stomp on an old lady's heart! 
Wonderful, powerful post!
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If you have to choose between tears and laughter, remember that laughter burns more calories.
Proud New Army Mom - off to bootcamp!
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RX_Sith
Registered:
Mar '06
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Date Posted:
4/21 10:03am
Subject:
RE: Eclipse of the Force ***Updated 4/21***
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Golden_Jedi: Thank you. I am sorry if it ended up being more angst and drama then mush.
KELIA: Well, thanks for the reply, but this story isn't over yet... 
Healer_Leona: Yes, there were some very tragic things that happened to some of her family.
Jade_Max: Thank you. It was more intense than mush, but it is not quite finished yet... 
VaderLVR64: Sorry if I broke your heart, but it's what the muse decided.
Mada could feel her heart beating practically through her chest. It pounded incessantly as she and her mother stood still by the edge of the huge gaping hole that had swallowed her father and sister. She wanted to join her departed family members inside of the darkness below them. Her mother's grasp on her was as tight as the anchor that dragged on her emotions.
"Please mother," she pleaded, "Let go of me. I want to join them."
"No child," Veron calmed her slightly but still tightened her grip on her remaining daughter, "We must leave, NOW!!!" She pulled Mada forcefully back from the void that almost encircled them. There was a bridge to safety that was getting smaller and smaller as Veron dragged her child across it.
The bridge started to collapse behind them as they reached safety for the moment. Mada cried openly into her mother's arms as she held her close. "There there," Veron wiped her tears away, "We have to keep moving, understand?" she begged her daughter.
"Why?" Mada wept through her tears, "Why?"
"Because, they will have died in vain if we don't stay alive," she retorted looking directly into her daughter's eyes, "When it is our time then we will join them. But not until then, do you understand!"
"Yes, mother," Mada stated begrudgingly, "You are right."
"Good, now calm down and try to focus on where we need to go to next," Veron begged her, "Please".
Mada stood still and closed her eyes. She saw the hole that had engulfed her father and sister and something else familiar as well; there souls. "Listen to your mother," her departed father instructed her, "You must protect her."
"Father," Mada whispered in her mind, "How are you able to talk to me?"
"I do not know," Hesu replied, "I only know that I can."
"Is Nata there with you?" Mada inquired. "Yes," her sister answered, "It seems as though we have a new existence to explore together now."
"What kind of existence could it possibly be?" she asked her sister. "One of wonder..." Nata remarked, "And hope and peace. I feel no danger, no hunger, no thirst, just existence in a magical world."
"And it's the same for you as well, father?" Mada questioned him now.
"Yes, Nata and I are at peace now," he stated solemnly, "Do not worry, my child. We are happy and together. That is all that matters. Now go southwest from your location and there you will be safe."
"For how long?" she asked him sincerely. "There will be something remarkable that will happen to you and your mother once you arrive," Hesu instructed her, "Something wonderful."
Mada broke out of her trance. "Mother!" she exclaimed, "Father and Nata are safe!"
"How do you know?" she inquired. "I've spoken with them," Mada answered, "Father says that we are to go southwest from here. There we will be safe and something wonderful will happen to us."
"What?!" her mother wondered excitedly. "I don't know," her daughter answered, "Just that it will be remarkable."
They started there journey southwest as her father instructed. They walked for hours with nothing abnormal in sight. They even passed some crystalline pockets that looked very safe for the moment. "How much longer?" Veron asked somewhat impatiently. "I still don't know," Mada replied remorsefully, "I just know that we need to continue."
After a few more hours of there journey they decided to rest for a little while. Veron rubbed her sore feet as she sat on a large rock. "Shouldn't we rest for the night?" she questioned her daughter, "I am starting to get very tired."
"I guess so," Mada replied regretfully, "I cannot go another step either." They both walked towards a small crystalline pocket that was just barely big enough for both of them. They were exhausted from the long journey that they had embarked on and Mada snuggled close to her mother as the cold night bit harshly outside of their safe abode.
The winds gusted ferociously and thunder and lightly crackled outside loudly. They both fell into a deep sleep as asteroid after asteroid tore apart the world around them. The planet was literally being ripped up all around their small enclosure.
And then Eclipse was no more. The planet had been pummeled into oblivion, but the small crystalline pocket rose away from the explosions that occurred around it. If flung them away at an incredible speed away from their solar system on a journey towards somewhere else.
Both mother and daughter were encased in a deep hibernation within the crystalline enclosure. They traveled to the edge of their solar system and beyond towards the center of the galaxy. They entered a strange looking planet and landed in a small lake that enveloped their small crystalline pocket.
The crystalline structure receded into the lake enough that it was below water level. Ages upon ages of time passed by as barnacles attached to the crystalline abode. Soon it was encased from the sides to the bottom with just a small opening at the top. A figure's shadow looked at the strange object and smiled.
"Strange this object is," it stated as it raised the structure out of the water to the shore that it was standing on. A flash of light sliced open the top as the two inhabitants slid to the muddy ground. The small creature huddled over the two and raised up an earlobe, "Powerful the small one is," it whispered, "Powerful indeed."
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KELIA
Title: Moderator: Fan Fiction
Registered:
Jul '05
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Date Posted:
4/21 12:07pm
Subject:
RE: Eclipse of the Force ***Updated 4/21***
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WOW
And I thought Mada and her mother would surely be killed.
What a lovely twist!
Great update
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