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Topic:
X-Wings and Broomsticks - humor viggie - Luke and a friend
VadersLadies
Registered:
Jul '04
Date Posted:
1/26/05 12:35pm
Subject:
X-Wings and Broomsticks - humor viggie - Luke and a friend
Title: X-Wings and Broomsticks
Author: VadersLadies (VadersMistress and VaderLVR64)
Characters: Harry Potter and Luke Skywalker
Genre: Humor (we hope)
Time: Who knows?
Summary: Harry wants to improve his flying skills. Who better to teach him than the greatest pilot the galaxy has ever seen?
A/N: We were feeling rather silly a few weeks ago and this is the result. We apologize in advance…
X-Wings and Broomsticks
“Harry, you’ve been asked to my office because… well, to be blunt, several of your instructors have complained that you seem to have difficulty abiding by the policies of this academy.”
The boy stared at him, his green eyes widening in surprise. “But I don’t understand! I try to follow the rules, Master Skywalker, I really do!”
Luke sighed and shook his head. “Yes, Harry, I understand that, I really do. But even you must admit that you have a knack for getting into trouble.”
The boy looked down at his feet. “I try not to; it’s just that trouble seems to follow me.”
Luke smiled. “That it does.” He picked up a file on his desk and opened it. “Now, why don’t you tell me why you’ve been so difficult lately?”
Still staring at his feet, Harry pushed up on the bridge of his glasses. “I don’t know.”
Leaning forward over his desk, Luke said “Harry, it’s okay. You can talk to me.”
Harry simply shrugged. “I guess it’s just that I haven’t had such a great life.”
“I see. Care to elaborate?” His voice was gentle, as always. Master Skywalker never raised his voice.
Harry looked up at Luke. “Why don’t you look it up in that file of yours?” He snapped.
Laughing to cover a cough, Luke was still as calm as ever.
Harry often wondered what sort of medication Master Skywalker was taking. “Because I’d rather hear it from you. These files only tell the bare facts, they don’t tell the stories behind them, do you understand?”
The boy nodded slowly. “Yeah, I understand. They’re biased.”
Luke shook his head. “No, not really. But they’re not unbiased either, if that makes any sense.” He smiled at Harry, who gave him a half smile in return. “Now, enough small talk. Tell me what’s been going on lately.”
Well, ever since I found out I’m a wizard things have been a bit, er, crazy.” He looked down at his feet.
Luke merely sat back in his chair and laced his fingers together. “And?”
“And it’s been all downhill from there.”
Luke sighed. “Harry, you’re not telling me anything I don’t already know. Here, start from the beginning. Tell me what you’re first memory is.”
Harry rolled his eyes. This was not his favorite topic. “I remember my parents getting killed and then unintentionally stopping a Dark Lord, which has pretty much screwed up my life. Oh, and by killing the Dark Lord when I couldn’t even drink out of a cup yet, I bought a world of trouble for myself. And then I ticked him off even more because I have some of his powers. Now he comes after me every year without fail, well except for my third year, but that year still kind of sucked anyway. Any questions?”
“So this is a yearly thing?”
“Yeah, it’s sort of a tradition now, I guess.”
“Not a very pleasant one, I’m guessing.”
“Duh, that’s sort of obvious.”
“And so you think that being a pain in class is a reasonable response to the stress of having this Dark Lord after you?”
Harry shrugged, his cheeks turning bright pink. “Probably not, but… I dunno, I just get tired of people staring sometimes.”
“Why would they stare?”
Harry lifted his unruly bangs to reveal the lightning shaped scar. “Because of this little item. Lord Voldemort gave it to as a souvenir.”
Luke grinned and pulled up his sleeve. He touched an area on the inside of his forearm and two tiny doors opened, revealing a mass of electronic circuitry. “Yeah, a Dark Lord chopped off my hand and left with
this
little reminder.”
Harry stared. “Wizard!”
“Yeah, it’s pretty cool. The chicks dig it, anyway.” Luke blushed and then coughed. “Anyway, I understand what you’re going through. I really do.”
“It’s not just that, it’s my parents, too.”
“They stare at your scar?” Luke frowned. “I’d think they’d be used to it by now.”
“No, my parents are dead,” Harry explained again patiently.
“Oh, that’s right, you told me that.” Luke said as he hit himself on the forehead. “Mine, too. Sorry, I just don’t get to meet too many other orphans.”
“Well, my mother and father were murdered by an evil Dark Lord,” Harry explained.
“My father
was
a murderous Dark Lord,” Luke replied.
“Wow! That pretty much sucks for you, doesn’t it?”
“Yeah, tell me about it.”
“So what did you do about it?”
Luke shrugged. “I told him that I saw the good in him and we made up.”
Harry’s eyes grew wide with disbelief. “And that worked?”
“It seemed to; he was pretty nice at the end.”
“End?”
“He died right after we made up,” Luke said quietly.
“Bummer!”
“It was pretty bad,” Luke agreed. “But I had my sister to help me through it.”
“You have a sister? That’s cool.”
Luke leaned forward and looked around before he whispered conspiratorially. “Well, she’s kind of bossy, if you know what I mean.”
Harry shuddered. “Oh, I know what you mean. I have this friend, Hermione, and she’s always telling me what to do.”
Luke nodded in agreement. “I swear she thinks I can’t even dress myself without her help.” He sat back in his chair and propped his feet up on the desk. “It’s kinda embarrassing when you’re a Jedi Master, the only one in the galaxy mind you, and your own sister is wiping your face after you eat.”
“She sounds a
lot
like Hermione,” the boy said fervently.
Luke shrugged. “And I can’t even yell at her for it because, well…” Luke leaned in and dropped his voice to a low whisper, “to be honest I’m kind of scared of her.”
Harry nodded knowingly. “I know what you mean, Hermione, man oh man, you do
not
want to piss her off!”
Luke grinned. “They will smite you down,” Luke said, jabbing his finger on his desk for emphasis. He chuckled and then shook his head. “We got a bit off track, eh?”
Harry shrugged. “A bit.”
“Anyway, where were we? Oh, right -orphans and Dark Lords. So, when your parents died you went to live with your aunt and uncle, is that correct?”
Harry scowled. “Yeah, and what a disappointment that turned out to be.”
Luke sat up and leaned on his elbows on his desk. “How’s that?”
Harry pushed up on the bridge of his glasses. “Isn’t that all in the file?” he asked, gesturing to the file on the desk.
“Yes, yes it is. But as I said before, I’d like to hear
your
side of it.”
Harry sighed and said, “Well, I lived in this tiny cupboard under the stairs and they either A-ignored me, or B- treated me like a kriffin piece of bantha dung.”
Luke ignored Harry’s language and said, “Ah, and how did that make you feel?”
Harry looked at Luke sharply. “You’ve got to be kidding me. Are you trying to psychoanalyze me? You have no idea what my life has been like so don’t even try to figure me out because you spent an hour talking to me!” Harry stood up abruptly and half turned to walk out the door.
“Harry,” Luke said calmly. “Sit down. Sit down and explain to me what is you are feeling. I can’t help you understand and make things better if I don’t know what the problem is.”
Clenching his jaw, he stopped and stared at Luke for a moment. Then he slowly nodded and sat back down. “Whatever.”
“Good, we’re making real progress here,” Luke said, sitting back in his seat.
Harry just looked at him as if he was insane.
“I lived with my aunt and uncle, too. They were pretty nice, especially Aunt Beru.”
“You lived with an aunt and uncle, too?”
“Yeah, until they got murdered by the people looking for my droids,” Luke admitted. “It was sort of my fault, I guess.”
Harry looked up and grinned. “Do they take contracts?”
Luke scowled at the boy. “That is not very nice, Harry. My aunt and uncle were good people and now they’re dead.”
The boy flushed and lowered his eyes. “Well, my aunt and uncle aren’t nice people,” he defended himself.
“I see,” Luke said.
“No, I don’t think you do,” Harry responded. “But it doesn’t matter anyway. I promise I’ll try to do better. Can I go now?”
The Jedi sighed deeply. “I guess so.”
Harry jumped to his feet and was almost to the door when the Master’s voice stopped him. “Just remember that I’m always here for you, Harry.”
Nodding his head, Harry left the office with a sigh of relief. “Stupid kriffin Jedi,” he muttered as he walked down the hallway. “Always think they know everything!”
Inside his office, Luke lowered his head to his desk and said between clenched teeth, “Stupid teenagers, they think they know everything!”
-----signature-----
Big Brother Visits a GFFA
http://boards.theforce.net/The_Saga/b10476/16474899/?14
A very lovely sock indeed for VaderLVR64 & VadersMistress
Second Chances
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Maggy
Registered:
Oct '04
Date Posted:
1/26/05 12:47pm
Subject:
RE: X-Wings and Broomsticks - humor viggie - Luke and a friend
great start
looking forward for more
Mag
-----signature-----
The Revenant -
http://boards.theforce.net/a/b10477/28313064
- co authored with Jedi Ant
"Maggy rawks
" - YodaKenbi
Proud Recipient of the Golden Elegos™
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LukesTheMan
Registered:
Apr '04
Date Posted:
1/26/05 2:18pm
Subject:
RE: X-Wings and Broomsticks - humor viggie - Luke and a friend
Ah, the two orphan boys with special powers can console each other!
-----signature-----
Of Metal and Flesh
http://boards.theforce.net/The_Saga/b10476/19859245
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AnakinsHeir
Registered:
May '04
Date Posted:
1/27/05 5:57am
Subject:
RE: X-Wings and Broomsticks - humor viggie - Luke and a friend
Nice! Very cute! I can see Harry and Luke having a lot in common.
-----signature-----
Let Me Go
http://boards.theforce.net/The_Saga/b10476/18359174/?2
Master to JediCallista_1_6_e54
A Mother's Wishes
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EmilieDarklighter
Registered:
Jan '02
Date Posted:
6/7/05 12:18pm
Subject:
RE: X-Wings and Broomsticks - humor viggie - Luke and a friend
LOL! I love this story! It makes me all warm and fuzzy inside. I have (somewhere in the distant future) plans for a HP/SW crossover that sprung from a plot bunny sort of like this.
Lovely job, ladies!
-----signature-----
Master of Jedi_Emeritus
Former Padawan of Gabri_Jade
Little sister to Gabri_Jade and LadyPadme
25 Rules for Successful Writing
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-RebelScum-
Registered:
Feb '04
Date Posted:
6/7/05 12:24pm
Subject:
RE: X-Wings and Broomsticks - humor viggie - Luke and a friend
I am not really a potter fan, but I still found this funny.
-The Scummy-
-----signature-----
Fantasy Keeps Me Sane.
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Marbe
Registered:
Jun '03
Date Posted:
6/7/05 1:23pm
Subject:
RE: X-Wings and Broomsticks - humor viggie - Luke and a friend
-
Date Edited:
6/7/05 9:26pm
(1 edits total)
Edited By:
Marbe
I lived with my aunt and uncle, too. They were pretty nice, especially Aunt Beru.”
“You lived with an aunt and uncle, too?”
“Yeah, until they got murdered by the people looking for my droids,” Luke admitted. “It was sort of my fault, I guess.”
Harry looked up and grinned. “Do they take contracts?”
:O :O
:O :O :O
:^O :^O :^O :^O :^O :^O :^O :^O :^O :^O
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:O :O :O :^O :^O :^O :^O :O :O :O
:O :O :O :^O :^O :^O :^O :O :O :O
:O :O :O :^O :^O :^O :^O :O :O :O
-----signature-----
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DarthIshtar
Title:
Former CR
Registered:
Mar '01
Date Posted:
6/7/05 1:28pm
Subject:
RE: X-Wings and Broomsticks - humor viggie - Luke and a friend
LOL, very amusing concept. Having a contest about whose life sucks worse...
-----signature-----
"I feel like a more down-to-earth Pink 5 when I'm writing Leah. Same attitude, less lip gloss." ~Me on how to get in the right mindset for Twilight fanfic.
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Healer_Leona
Title:
Manager Emeritus
Registered:
Jul '00
Date Posted:
6/7/05 1:56pm
Subject:
RE: X-Wings and Broomsticks - humor viggie - Luke and a friend
Well ladies, that was very funny. Loved how each seemed to have something in commen with their lives yet worse... dark lords, aunt & uncles.. quite amusing indeed.
-----signature-----
Feel so good, but I'm old
2000 years of chasing's taking it's toll
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WynssaStarflare
Registered:
Nov '04
Date Posted:
6/7/05 2:57pm
Subject:
RE: X-Wings and Broomsticks - humor viggie - Luke and a friend
Lol
I guess Luke and Harry have a lot in common.
Great post.
--Wynssa
-----signature-----
Finally free!!! Now only to find employment....
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Knight_Aragorn
Registered:
Jun '03
Date Posted:
6/7/05 9:38pm
Subject:
RE: X-Wings and Broomsticks - humor viggie - Luke and a friend
Great job, ladies! I'd never thought about how many similarities those two share before.
There are a lot, aren't there? I liked the ending.
Fantastic crossover viggie!
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