Author Topic: Fire and Water - L/M, dark romance
___Sithspawn___  741 posts
Registered: Aug '04
46181_Padme Jedi
Date Posted: 3/9/06 9:42am Subject: Fire and Water - L/M, dark romance
Title: Fire and Water
Author: Sithspawn
Genre: AU, romance, darkness, perhaps some angst.
Rating: PG-13
A/N: Just a little blurb I came up with after listening to Rammstein's song Feuer und Wasser.








Feuer und Wasser kommt nicht zusammen
Kann man nicht binden sind nicht verwandt
In Funken versunken steh ich in Flammen
Und bin im Wasser verbrannt

~Rammstein




She is beautiful, always captivating. The way her hair flows around her, like a curtain of flames, leaves me gasping for air, drowning me. The sparkle in her eyes - it never leaves her, not even when she cries - ignites a flame within me. It has burned from the day I first laid my eyes on her. It's always there, even when I close my eyes to sleep. It destroys me slowly.



But she is most lovely when she swims. She swims alone and naked. It does not matter to her. She likes to strip off her clothing, strip off her mask. She drifts on the surface of an arctic lake, still and untouched. I do not know what these words are describing. The lake, or the ethereal vision in my eyes? She is one with the clear, gentle water. Through it she glides, dancing like a little ray of light. Graceful. Weightless. Free.



The water, caressing her smooth, flawless skin, like the hand of a ghost. And I wish I could dissolve into it and stroke her small, delicate white legs...This lust and desire, scalding to the touch, searing my skin, eating its way to my flesh... Why does it torment me so?



My bare feet touch cool water, and I throw myself forward, disturbing the tranquility, breaking the silence. The water shatters around my face.drops like shards of ice, cutting, so cold that they burn.



I burrow into the depths - not a trace of her elegance. Into the deep, where the light starts to wane, where it cannot reach me. The water does not stroke me, it does not embrace me. It stings me, raking frigid claws against my body, seeking only to harm, to mangle. It does not love me.



I follow her, just close enough to absorb her absolute beauty, to drink in her aura. But no closer. I have not the courage. She does not see me. Never does. She closes her eyes. I am but a shadow at her back.



Up close, I can see the flames dancing around her porcelain face, curving, twisting, shimmering in the rays of sunlight streaming down to kiss her face. They do not reach me. I am but a dark form beneath her, bound to the black, murky depths. I am the beast waiting for its prey. I am the somber note in the water's silent song.





I turn away in shame. I have no right to stare at the lovely creature above, lest my filthy gaze soil her pure, white soul. Why lust after an angel, when she is so far above me? Why bring forth such agony? I lurk in the abyss, knowing that she can never love a dark little thing like me. She will not waste herself on me.



A dagger of black ice tears through my heart. But what's another wound, another scar, among so many? Infinitesimal. A teardrop breaking the surface of an ocean. The water is colder now, and the fire on her face sheds no heat.



It does not fuse to the waters, does not merge with them. It slices them, stabbing, piercing raging against it. For fire and water cannot be brought together. No force is strong enough to bind them. No chains can shackle her to me.



She frolics in the crystal fluid, carefree, innocent light. And I, the predator, stare hungrily at that which I will never have, a prisoner reaching through metal bars for the freedom he is denied, a meaningless little speck of dust, wishing so fervently for wings to touch the sky, forever left to wallow in the dirt. The water burns me.



I let myself sink further down, out of sight, to be forgotten...breathe in the lethal dusk...let it swallow me...Soon my heart will cease to beat.



But wait, something inside me breaks! I soar, soar like a phoenix...I grasp her tightly, never to let go. Her pale flesh is clammy as a fish. Glacial. Yet I do not set her free.



I choke her gently, tenderly. I take her beauty and devour it. I deface it. I crush, I rip, I tear, I strip, I shatter...I avenge. I love. I hate. I break. I burn. I drown. I die.

 

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RedGold  4293 posts
Registered: Nov '04
41217_Mara Jade
Date Posted: 3/9/06 9:57am Subject: RE: Fire and Water - L/M, dark romance
now that is what I call a dark romance...

beautifully done

 

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Star_Angel  4775 posts
Registered: Jan '06
6161_Padme
Date Posted: 3/9/06 11:41am Subject: RE: Fire and Water - L/M, dark romance - Date Edited: 3/9/06 11:42am (1 edits total) Edited By: Star_Angel
Wonderful _Sithspawn_.

You did a great job with the describing part.

Keep up the fantastic job applause peace grin .

 

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mavjade  5032 posts
Title: Fan Fiction Manager
Registered: Sep '05
50898_NaNo 13
Date Posted: 3/9/06 11:52am Subject: RE: Fire and Water - L/M, dark romance
WOW! That was dark, but I really liked it!

Very beautifully written!

My favorite part was..
A dagger of black ice tears through my heart. But what's another wound, another scar, among so many? Infinitesimal. A teardrop breaking the surface of an ocean. The water is colder now, and the fire on her face sheds no heat.
That was a very powerful pharagraph!

Great Job!

 

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Feng_Huang  358 posts
Registered: Apr '05
18643_Luke Skywalker
Date Posted: 3/9/06 1:30pm Subject: RE: Fire and Water - L/M, dark romance
I'm always scared to read your stuff, it's so dark. This piece was very lyrical, though. Beautiful. applause

 

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JadeLotus  1376 posts
Registered: Mar '05
24190_Owen and Beru
Date Posted: 3/9/06 2:58pm Subject: RE: Fire and Water - L/M, dark romance
I choke her gently, tenderly. I take her beauty and devour it. I deface it. I crush, I rip, I tear, I strip, I shatter...I avenge. I love. I hate. I break. I burn. I drown. I die.

shock Wow...wonderfully evocative.

Great job, Sithspawn! You certainly know how to write darkness.

 

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academygrad88  5723 posts
Registered: Apr '04
13884_Luke and Mara
Date Posted: 3/9/06 3:13pm Subject: RE: Fire and Water - L/M, dark romance
Wow, that was dark, but very nicely written.

Great job.

AG88

 

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Jade_Pilot  5050 posts
Registered: Dec '05
46068_Rianna Saren
Date Posted: 3/9/06 3:53pm Subject: RE: Fire and Water - L/M, dark romance
Amazing, terrifying and so very well written! Bravo!

 

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Bianka_Kenobi  77 posts
Registered: Jun '05
23767_Khaleen
Date Posted: 3/9/06 4:35pm Subject: RE: Fire and Water - L/M, dark romance
It seems like Mara is the one who feels unworthy of approaching Luke in many fics, but in this piece Luke was the one who feels unworthy of Mara. I like it. It's so dark and dreamlike. Very beautiful.

 

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jackyyy17  4183 posts
Registered: Jan '06
43743_Mara Jade
Date Posted: 3/9/06 5:28pm Subject: RE: Fire and Water - L/M, dark romance
shock Wow, that was very dark. But it was good.

jacky

 

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Gabri_Jade  5087 posts
Title: Fan Fiction Archive Editor Emeritus
Registered: Nov '02
23035_Mara Jade
Date Posted: 3/9/06 9:10pm Subject: RE: Fire and Water - L/M, dark romance
Very interesting. thinking Definitely dark, but also very lyrical and with absolutely lovely imagery. Nicely done. happy

 

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___Sithspawn___  741 posts
Registered: Aug '04
46181_Padme Jedi
Date Posted: 3/10/06 5:44am Subject: RE: Fire and Water - L/M, dark romance
First of all, I'd like to thank everyone for the positive feedback - it made my day.

RedGold: When I said it, I meant it...

Feng_Huang: Don't worry, my fics don't bite wink

JadeLotus: Darkness is my specialty.

Bianka_Kenobi: I considered switching the roles around, but then then thought better of it...


 

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"As long as there are slaughterhouses, there will be battlefields." -- Leo Tolstoy
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Jade_Pilot  5050 posts
Registered: Dec '05
46068_Rianna Saren
Date Posted: 3/10/06 5:54am Subject: RE: Fire and Water - L/M, dark romance
___Sithspawn___ posted:
Bianka_Kenobi: I considered switching the roles around, but then then thought better of it...


Oh, I definitely think it was more powerful the way you used the roles. Good call!

 

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Jade_eyes  6503 posts
Registered: Aug '04
Date Posted: 3/16/06 8:28am Subject: RE: Fire and Water - L/M, dark romance
That was intense. applause It was interesting to see the roles switched, so that Mara was the bastion of light, and Luke the devouring darkness. Powerful stuff. happy

 

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MirandaFair  2371 posts
Registered: Jun '05
43773_Female Admiral
Date Posted: 3/16/06 9:22am Subject: RE: Fire and Water - L/M, dark romance
Whoa. Beautifully descriptive and indeed, very dark! Great work! rose applause

 

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