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Topic:
Jedi Adept: A Path In The Dark -- Ch. 9 08/24/2008
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L0B0
Registered:
Jan '08
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Date Posted:
6/16 8:47am
Subject:
RE: Jedi Adept: A Path In The Dark -- Ch. 1 on 06/15/2008
- Date Edited:
6/16 8:48am (1 edits total)
Edited By:
L0B0
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"That was uncalled for Jedi Veila," Cilghal responded.
Says you, maybe.
Noelani dropped to her knees, and covered her face with her hands, as she began crying. She couldn't handle the Masters like this. She had always respected them, always believed that they were the best the galaxy had to offer.
They were supposed to be the epitome of the Light Side of the Force.
Yet, as her body shook with her tears, and the only person in the room that cared was Tahiri, as she laid a hand gently on the top of her head, Noelani realized something.
A fundamental truth slammed through her.
The Jedi were as flawed as every other being in the galaxy.
If not more so.
Now that's what I call a major revelation & a massive understatement all at the same time. I'm shocked that the council can be this dense. Sadly, I'm not even that surprised, but that doesn't mean I have to like it.
As she pushed onto the stairs leading down, she heard Tahiri make a final snapped comment towards the Council. "Well, Luke, I hope you're proud of yourself."
For a split second, I started to think that Luke has a point and maybe Tahiri was the one who needed to come to her senses. Then I realized that none of what they said matters in the least because the fact is that Tahiri is Noelani's mother, and as such it is entirely up to her to decide what is best for her daughter.
*oh, and I miss Mara.
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Check your Six! ---> http://www.talonintelligencesquadron.com/index.htm * Mando'ad draar digu... * Self Appointed FADA Acolyte
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Makenna
Registered:
Apr '08
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Date Posted:
6/16 11:22am
Subject:
RE: Jedi Adept: A Path In The Dark -- Ch. 1 on 06/15/2008
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Wow, I really like it so far. I've never read a fic like this. Good job.
-----signature-----
She had dark brown eyes and a slightly upturned nose. With her silver circlet and proud expression, she looked so much like royalty that I had to resist the urge to sit up straight and say, "Yes, ma'am". ^Percy Jackson and the Olympians, Book 3
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Jade_eyes
Registered:
Aug '04
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Date Posted:
6/16 4:45pm
Subject:
RE: Jedi Adept: A Path In The Dark -- Ch. 1 on 06/15/2008
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Bravo on an amazing update!!!! Tahiri is fantastic in this, strong and straightforward Every single syllable she says is the unvarnished truth. I see a lot of simiarities in the profic LOTF Jedi and the Jedi the way it was in the prequel era which made it so vulnerable to be used/abused/misguided etc. by Palpatine. Can't wait for their chat--I bet Noelani and Tahiri stage their ownpersonal mutiny LOL
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I'm reading 8 drabble threads!  beans!  That must be a record. Care to make it 9? SQUEEEE! Huggles & roses, jade eyes.
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TelannaTani
Registered:
Jun '05
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Date Posted:
6/17 1:11pm
Subject:
RE: Jedi Adept: A Path In The Dark -- Ch. 1 on 06/15/2008
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Finally found my way over here. Thanks for the PM - please keep them coming as you update.
Interesting backstory, with Tionne picking her up to begin her Jedi training, and now with Tionne being her Master. Am I assuming correctly that you're trying to follow some parallel with the canon story, including Mara's death? Otherwise, I'm a little confused by that...
Luke has lost his kriffing mind, IMHO. And while I don't know that I would condone such an emotional debate amongst the Jedi Council on a regular basis, I was TOTALLY cheering for Tahiri. "How many times will you try and take my daughter away from me?"
Indeed!
Can't wait for more of this. And I can't wait for Chase's return!!
Voz
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John 8:31-32 Callsign: "Voz" Padawan to BigFatty
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Kidan
Title: TFN EU Staff
Registered:
Jul '03
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Date Posted:
6/19 7:09am
Subject:
RE: Jedi Adept: A Path In The Dark -- Ch. 1 on 06/15/2008
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DARTH_MU
Escape from the Jedi temple and their training to the dark side of the force will be complete!
Seriously, they should just leave the jedi and become bounty hunters.
*shrugs* we'll see...
Family, that's the important thing. Kriff the dogmatic views of the Jedi, I say!
yes, but you're a Sith, remember...
Draconarius
Wow. Love it, Kidan. I'm going to have to go back and read the other fics. **makes mental note** If you're sending PMs for updates, could you add me to the list?
Thanks! I hope you enjoy the others as well, and I'd be ecstatic to add you to the list.
I wonder why Tahiri didn't decide to hell with all of them and leave the order then and there. Luke's starting to repeat the mistakes Yoda and the Old Republic Jedi made (which he was doing in pro fic, as well, so I shouldn't really be surprised...).
Tahiri's confused. She wants to be a Jedi. It's the only thing she knows how to do. And yes, Luke is repeating the mistakes of the OJO...
Can't wait for more!
Sunday!
SWpants666
I just love your description of the Jedi Temple. It sounds gorgeous and soothing and I want to be there.
thanks!
And I would definitely love to see that
as would I...
I agree. Luke is definitely making me angry in this. I guess I can understand where he's coming from, but seriously, who better to train a growing woman than her mother who she's already formed a bond with?
I find it deliciously ironic in what Luke does in profic regarding Ben just a bit further down the timeline than when this story is set...
Granted Tionne's not a bad substitute, but I do not like what Luke is doing. Naughty Luke
not a bad substitute, but there shouldn't have had to been a substitute in the first place. This is still Luke screwing things up...
Ah, poor Noelani
aye, she does get the shaft end of things, doesn't she? That's the problem with being the protagonist of the story...
L0B0
Says you, maybe.
heh
Now that's what I call a major revelation & a massive understatement all at the same time. I'm shocked that the council can be this dense. Sadly, I'm not even that surprised, but that doesn't mean I have to like it.
aye...it is something of a shock to her...and though it's shocking, it really is sad that it's not surprising...
For a split second, I started to think that Luke has a point and maybe Tahiri was the one who needed to come to her senses. Then I realized that none of what they said matters in the least because the fact is that Tahiri is Noelani's mother, and as such it is entirely up to her to decide what is best for her daughter.
but she's also a Jedi, and wants her daughter to be one as well. It's the last link she truly has with Anakin. *shrugs*
*oh, and I miss Mara.
me too...
Makenna
Wow, I really like it so far. I've never read a fic like this. Good job.
Thanks!! Glad you're enjoying it!
Jade_eyes
Bravo on an amazing update!!!! Tahiri is fantastic in this, strong and straightforward Every single syllable she says is the unvarnished truth. I see a lot of simiarities in the profic LOTF Jedi and the Jedi the way it was in the prequel era which made it so vulnerable to be used/abused/misguided etc. by Palpatine. Can't wait for their chat--I bet Noelani and Tahiri stage their ownpersonal mutiny LOL
Thanks!! And Tahiri is fantastic, though she's hurting and really doesn't know what she should be doing herself. Yes, the JEdi are acting very Prequel-ish, but hey, it's set during LotF, it's what they do. As for Noelani and Tahri... well, let's just say for to girls that talk as much as they do, communication doesn't necessarily happen....
TelannaTani
Finally found my way over here. Thanks for the PM - please keep them coming as you update.
yippie! Glad you could join us and i'd be happy to add you to the list
Interesting backstory, with Tionne picking her up to begin her Jedi training, and now with Tionne being her Master. Am I assuming correctly that you're trying to follow some parallel with the canon story, including Mara's death? Otherwise, I'm a little confused by that...
Yes, I'm trying to keep this as close to canon as possible. There are some minor differences (such as Ben taking a short trip to Ossus after his trip to Ziost and I've added time here or there, so, while it's not 100% canon, i've gotten as close as possible without sacrificing the story I'm telling...
Luke has lost his kriffing mind, IMHO. And while I don't know that I would condone such an emotional debate amongst the Jedi Council on a regular basis, I was TOTALLY cheering for Tahiri. "How many times will you try and take my daughter away from me?"
Yeah, Luke is a tad crazed at the moment...
Indeed!
Can't wait for more of this. And I can't wait for Chase's return!!
More will be up Sunday, and we'll get to see Chase in a post or three....
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You sadistic Yank!! - McEwok No Krakana - http://nokrakana.wrighton.org Believe in the Constitution? Ron Paul '08
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Thrawn McEwok
Title: TFN EU Staff
Registered:
May '00
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Date Posted:
6/21 6:00pm
Subject:
RE: Jedi Adept: A Path In The Dark -- Ch. 1 on 06/15/2008
- Date Edited:
6/22 3:38am (2 edits total)
Edited By:
Thrawn McEwok
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Kidan posted: Summary: The secret that Luke Skywalker has hidden for fourteen years has been found out. Now, Tahiri, Noelani and the rest of the Council know the secret of Luke's action in the midst of the Vong War.
Serves him right!
Kidan posted: Yet, after the murder of Mara Jade Skywalker, and Luke's summary execution of Lumiya for it, questions have been raised on whether or not Tahiri would make a good mentor for Noelani. The decision which is passed down will have grave repercussions for not just Tahiri and Noelani, but for all of the Jedi.
*nods* Typical. The question they want to ask is whether Luke should have any say in the decision, surely?!
Kidan posted: PM List:Jade_eyes; SWpants666; G__Anakin; DARTH_MU; L0B0; Draconarius; TelannaTani;
... Thrawn McEwok, please?
Kidan posted:
It really looks the part. Where's Noelani off to?
Kidan posted: Chase Polliska - street urchin (male human)
Asyra'mata - street urchin (female Twi'lek)
Evir - Scientist (male human)
Zora Rekim - Private, Galactic Alliance Guard (female human)
Chase has found a sidekick? And we've not seen the other two before, have we?
Kidan posted:
"We each contain the potential for great good or great evil. We each hold the shadow of darkness... and the flame of light. Our destinies are not set, and life offers no guarantees. It is the choices that you make...that will determine what you become. It is not who raised us or who our parents were that determines our paths. The Emperor cannot reach out to you from beyond the grave-but neither can those you love make your choices for you. You will become what you become because of your choices...because of what you do."
-- Ikrit to Anakin Solo and Tahiri Veila (Anakin's Quest)
QFT.
Kidan posted: Eleven year old Noelani Darklighter was scared.
In her hand, she held the small message cube which had been delivered to her from the Jedi Temple a few days ago. An invitation. A summons. It was both of those things and more. She had been invited to go to the Jedi, to train to become one of them.
She squeezed the cube slightly, and stepped up to the rim of the sunken pit which formed the main courtyard of her home. Standing at the edge, she looked up and watched as the twin suns of Tatooine started their inexorable march towards the horizon.
The first dipped down towards the edge, gaining a hazy appearance as it set.
Noelani could not help but feel that this was her life. A sun that was setting.
"It is both a blessing and a curse, is it not?"
I like the elegaic tone here; there's a sense of pride and destiny, but also one of worry, a sense this is a demand and an expectation. When we take that back to Luke, it's a little chilling.
I guess the desert gets cold very fast at sunset...
Kidan posted: She turned at the voice, finding her adoptive father standing there. From her earliest memories he had been there for her, a hale, hearty man, slightly overweight with a bundle of snow-white hair often pulled into a tight tail by a small band of leather. But in the past two years, he has lost that weight and now carried a slightly gaunt look to his frame.
For the first time in her life, she realized just how old Huff Darklighter was. The realization was like a shot in the gut, as she fought to keep a frown from her face.
"How do you mean, Papa?"
He gestured towards the small cube in her hand. "The opportunity. How amazing it would be to become a Jedi. Yet to accept that opportunity means to leave everything you have ever known here."
He's wise.
Kidan posted: She chewed at her lip for a second, and then nodded her head.
"I don't wanna leave you."
She saw Huff's kind smile and remembered how often it had been turned her way. "I know, Little One, but you've been given a wonderful gift; the ability to help the galaxy. You will always have a home here, but I think you owe it to yourself to take the opportunity. "
Slowly, she nodded her head, and turned around, to watch Tatoo II finish setting, with Tatoo I just beginning to cross the horizon.
"I… I understand, sir."
"Good, I have someone I want you to meet."
"Oh?"
There was never any real doubt, any real choice, was there?
Do the Jedi realise what they're doing?
Probably not.
Kidan posted: Huff smiled at her and wrapped an arm around her shoulders, drawing her away the edge of the pit and towards a seed shaped spaceship; a reddish-orange blob, with odd protrusions on either side. Walking down the ramp towards them was a tall woman with flowing silver-white hair, dressed in simple brown robes. The material seemed to flow with her as she walked, the wind picking up her fine hair and tossing it about her head slightly, almost giving her the appearance of having a halo.
She stopped a few paces away from Noelani and Huff, and bowed slightly. When she straightened, Noelani noticed that she had pearl colored eyes, which seemed to shine with an internal light of their own.
"Hello, Noelani. I am Jedi Master Tionne Solusar. I was in this region and thought I would stop by and see if you had any questions or if you had made a decision to come and train with us."
Noelani glanced up at her father, and then back at the woman, nodding her head once quickly.
"Yes. I guess I'm coming with you. I, I guess I'm going to be a Jedi."
Tionne smiled warmly at her, saying, "That is wonderful news, Noelani. I am certain that you will become a wonderful Jedi."
Noelani smiled hesitatingly not quite certain how to respond.
Three things here: Noelani's excitement, honesty, and enthusiasm; the sense that the Jedi, the adult world, will betray and compromise it, controlling her and taking away her very optimism... and the hope that somehow, enough of Noelani's hope and strength can survive to negate and defeat the darkness that's coming...
Is Tionne's hair haloed by the sunlight? Or the electric light from her ship?
Kidan posted: A few days later, Tionne's starship, which Noelani had learned was called the Lore Seeker, was breaking orbit, dropping into Ossus's atmosphere.
Noelani smiled as the ship kissed the atmosphere, slicing through it, and then shedding speed until it finally dropped to a rest at the base of a massive stone structure. The white marble shone brightly in the silver-blue glare of the single sun, and Noelani could not help but feel a sense of awe settle over her.
That's what the architects intended?
Still, the description in itself is very good, enthralling and impressive. I guess style's not always a bad thing?
Kidan posted: Tionne turned to her, a smile coming easily to her face. "Welcome to Ossus, Noelani."
Too easily? Too innocently?
Kidan posted: Noelani smiled, and then followed Tionne out of the ship, and she took her first breath of a world which was not Tatooine.
The unreliable narrator feels compelled to point out that she was born on Mon Calamari.
Kidan posted: It was a cool, crisp scent, a smell that was not pleasant, but not one that was unpleasant either. She sniffed again, twitching her nose as she tried to place the different scents that hung on the air.
Interesting. Hope and control, again? It seems neutral, but it's a mix of good and bad, really?
Kidan posted: Before long, Tionne was opening the door to a long room, with small divided cells spaced evenly down either side.
"This is the dorms for your age group." She walked about a quarter of the way down and pointed towards one of the cells. "This one will be yours."
Noelani nodded her head. "Thanks, Master Tionne."
Tionne smiled at her, and turned to leave. "The rules are on the terminal, and I will see you in class tomorrow."
Then Noelani was alone.
Just like that. Jedi simplicity?
Kidan posted: She sighed, dropping her sack by the small chest which was provided. She looked around the partition, noting the desk and the terminal on it, the set of shelves set above the desk, and of course the cot and footlocker resting at the end of it. Finally, she threw herself onto her assigned bed, wrapping herself around her pillow.
That's a quite Anakin-like reaction in its neutral observance of detail...
Kidan posted: Though she had never been an outgoing child, she had never felt quite this alone in her life either.
And a Tahiri-like one in its emotion!
Kidan posted: She squeezed her eyes shut, trying to keep from crying. Not wanting that to be the first thing that those in her age group noticed about her.
Old enough to care about peer-pressure...
Kidan posted: Taking a deep breath, she finally noticed a new sound around her; someone walking down the center aisle, coming towards her. She opened her eyes and lifted her head slightly and watched as a young Bothan girl bounded around the corner and darted into the cell across from hers. Noelani looked at her closer, noticing the simple white tunic and dark brown pants she wore, admiring how it seemed to flow perfectly with the tan of her fur.
The Bothan dropped a couple of data chips on her desk, and then turned around, a bright smile came to her muzzle as she saw Noelani and she bounded across the aisle.
... but still young enough for moods to change like that!
Kidan posted: "Hey! I'm Kor Res'sal. You must be the new girl. It's a pleasure to meet you."
Noelani leveraged herself up from where she had been curled up on the bed, sitting on its edge and looked up at Kor. "Yeah. I guess I am. My name's Noelani Darklighter and I'm from Tatooine. Is it always this quite in here?"
Kor laughed. "No. There're usually a lot more people in here, but most are having a lesson right now, and those that aren't are studying."
"Oh. I see."
The Bothan grinned at her. "Come on, it's almost dinner time."
"Oh. Are you sure? I mean, I don't want to impose."
Kor laughed again. "Of course I'm sure. We're going to be Jedi together; we might as well be friends also."
"Friends?" Noelani smiled happily. "Yeah. I'd like that."
Kor bared her teeth in an imitation of Noelani's smile. "Then it's settled. We'll be friends."
That was a nice introduction, a good flashback to establish Noelani and Kor's friendship, but also tinged by the knowledge of what happened in the previous story in the series - to them, and to Noelani's whole view of the world...
Which brings us on to...
Kidan posted: Coruscant. The capital of the galaxy. Homeworld to billions upon billions of sapient beings. It is a world ruled by bureaucracy. Though it has a gross domestic output in the quintillions, in reality it produces nothing but laws, bureaucrats and soldiers. It is a giant city planet, covered almost entirely by smog and buildings.
[And I'm so tired I'm gonna have to postpone the rest of this for a few hours... I plan to get back to it ASAP, though! ]
EDIT: Okay! Here goes...!
Another stunning description, but a troubling one. For all its brilliance, Coruscant is unnecessary, and controlling.
Kidan posted: Small pockets of Yuuzhan Vong wildlife still struggle for life and survival, but these are few and far between, most located down deep, near the surface of the planet.
Interestingly ambiguous reference. Is the Yuuzhan Vong wildlife a good thing? Maybe not in itself, but it also serves to illustrate what Couscant does...
Kidan posted: Yet despite the fact that it claims to be a single, overarching city, there are districts and sub-cities within the great city. Precincts with their own flavor and culture, some as wildly divergent from the Galactic norm as any Outer Rim world, others displaying the annoying production-line perfection of any of a handful of Core worlds.
Yet out of all the buildings and monuments, parks and museums, there are two buildings which are more widely known than any other buildings in the galaxy.
There are two buildings which every sapient on the planet, and most within the borders of the Galactic Alliance, would know on sight.
One is the Alliance Governmental Complex, more commonly known as the Imperial Palace.
The other is the Jedi Temple.
Both are works of art in their own right, yet while the Palace is a beacon of ritz and glamour, the Jedi Temple is profound in its simplicity and beauty.
A gleaming citadel, a pyramid, capable of housing every living Jedi, trainee and their families, and still having thousands upon thousands of spare rooms, it is a massive edifice glorifying the relationship between the Jedi and the Galactic Alliance.
And on a consistent basis it is nearly empty of Jedi.
I think all that speaks for itself.
The divergence of diversity at the start both undermines and adds to the strength of Coruscant, but the emptiness of the Jedi HQ is really sharp, because unlike the more Outer Rim-like - and by implication, disenfranchised - districts, this is right next to the heart of government...
Also, once again, a funky piece of descriptive prose.
Kidan posted: Only a handful of Jedi are ever there at any given time, and though the Jedi Council holds its meetings there as a means of keeping close to the law-making body of the Alliance, for the Jedi it is merely a building. It is not home.
It is in the top most room of this pyramid in which the Council holds a majority of its meetings. An ostentatious room, designed to strike awe and respect into any of the sentients who have walked into it.
Mosaics adorn some of the walls and the floor, while large windows are situated behind the Council members themselves. When meetings were held at dusk, the setting sun would backlight the Council Members, giving them something of an ethereal glow.
The most impressive design though, is the Jedi sigil made from various colors of Hapan marble which adorned the floor.
It was here, in the Council Chambers, the most awe-inspiring room in the Jedi Temple, conceivably the most awe-inspiring room in the galaxy, which Noelani Darklighter found out her world was slowly crumbling.
A very pointed juxtaposition. The Council themselves don't realise that they're corrupted? They think they're somehow exempt from the effect, and they don't realise the grief caused by the tension between the expectations imbued in the place, and the reality of human feelings?
Kidan posted: Since the secret of her parentage had been revealed by Jedi Master Mara Jade Skywalker just a few short weeks ago, everything had been different. For a short time, she had thought that things were looking up.
Suddenly, she had a family beyond Huff Darklighter, the man who had raised her.
Suddenly, she had cousins and an uncle and an aunt. She had grandparents.
Suddenly, she knew who she was and where she had come from. All those thousands of questions she had asked and pondered over the years? Finally, she had answers for all of them.
Suddenly, her Master was her Mother.
Sure, her father had died during the war with the Yuuzhan Vong, but he had had a family that she now knew. She had grandparents and an uncle and aunt.
Yet for all the good, all the things that she had learned; that joy has now been sundered. She was once more cast adrift, lost to confusion when she had been so close to being safe and comfortable.
What sent her emotions spiraling downwards was the simple fact that the Council had determined that they needed to hold a hearing to decide if Tahiri would be too emotionally invested to be able to train her properly.
Idiots.
Kidan posted: For a moment, she wondered which she would have preferred, not knowing who her mother was and still being trained by Tahiri, or knowing and being yanked away from her the way Council seemed certain to do.
She allowed her gaze to flicker from one Master to the next. Corran Horn, Kirana Ti, and the old hermit Streen flickered as blue holograms, attending these proceedings from Corellia and Dathomir respectively. Cilghal and Kyp Durron seemed impassive as they watched the proceedings: she had overheard them talking with Tahiri earlier so she knew that those two supported Luke. Kam and Tionne Solusar each had a pained expression on their face, as if they were not certain where they stood on the issue. Kyle Katarn had a stern look on his face. One which caused Noelani to swallow hard as a cold lump formed in her stomach. She was not certain why, but Master Katarn always seemed so frightening to her.
Mara Skywalker's seat was empty, her recent murder still hanging over everyone's heads; making a difficult Council meeting just that much worse; especially since her revelations had been the cause of this meeting.
Then there was Luke Skywalker. He seemed darker, more ominous than she remembered from earlier discussions with him, and she wondered if that impression was because of what happened to Mara or because of what he had done to her. For a moment, she wondered why he always seemed to be taking her from Tahiri.
Politics, personal pressure, and emotion. These people are NOT in a fit state to judge this, are they?
Kidan posted: She quickly glanced at her mother, and felt her in the Force. A tight, coiled ball of nervous energy, tinted through out with anger and distrust.
Noelani looked fully at her mentor, her Master, her Mother, to see Tahiri's green eyes locked in place, as she stared at the Grand Master of the Jedi. Noelani shifted, following Tahiri's gaze, and started watching Luke as well.
Somehow, this reminds me of Tahiri in the vivarium in Conquest. I guess it must feel similar; constraint, no escape, lives being "shaped" and defined by others in the name of their "greater good"?
Kidan posted: Luke sighed, and dropped his eyes. "It is this Council's decision that you will be too emotionally involved to train her."
And with that simple pronouncement, Noelani Darklighter's world shattered. She found it hard to breath, and gulped at the air as tears stung her eyes.
Tahiri's voice was calm and level, yet Noelani could feel the emotions which her mother was suppressing. "Tell me Luke, why is it that you're constantly trying to take my daughter away from me?"
Good question.
Kidan posted: For a moment she wondered if Tahiri had plucked those thoughts from her head, but decided that she would probably be thinking that as well.
Does Noelani understand, though? Quite how wrong Luke's gone.
Kidan posted: Kyp spoke his voice tired and resigned. "Please speak to the Council members with the proper amount of respect, Knight Veila."
Ambiguous. Does he secretly sympathise?
Kidan posted: Tahiri snarled slightly as her attention snapped towards him. "Respect? When he kriffs with your family, stripping away months of your memories, and keeping something as important as a child from you. Then! Then you can come talk to me about respect."
Tionne sighed. "Angry outbursts from either side of this debate will not help things."
More political language. Does it help?
It certainly doesn't seem that the Jedi Council are listening, though.
Being unable to look past the anger to the message won't help, either.
Kidan posted: Tahiri turned towards Tionne, her jaw clenched as tight as her fists and then she sighed, as she nodded her head. "Sorry, Master Tionne."
Luke chose this moment to speak up again. "And these outbursts are why this Council feels that someone else should complete Noelani's training."
Tahiri opened her mouth to snap at Luke again, and he held up his hand, and said, "And that's enough."
Idiot. The outbursts are because of what he's done!!
Kidan posted: Tahiri slowly closed her mouth, anger pouring off of her, as she stared at Luke, her eyes flecks of green ice.
After a few moments, Luke spoke again. "The Council's decision is final." He then turned towards Noelani. "Noelani, your new master is Tionne. She will complete your training. You are both dismissed."
Noelani could feel her tears as they sliced down the sides of her cheeks.
I like the use of 'sliced' there, btw.
Kidan posted: She rubbed the back of her hand against the side of her face as she stared at Luke in shock. She knew that this meeting was about her continuing to train under Tahiri, but she never believed that she would be reassigned.
She had always thought that the Jedi's wisdom and compassion would make them realize how much of a mistake it would be to separate her from her mother.
Suddenly the full weight of the realization that it was the wise and compassionate Luke Skywalker who had stolen her from Tahiri in the first place crashed down upon her, threatening to crush her.
She took a step backwards, creating a larger gap between her and the Masters, and began to shake her head.
"Why?" she asked, her voice weak, and slight, even to her own ears. "Why did you do this, Master Skywalker?"
Luke sighed, and glanced out one of the windows at the lines of traffic visible in the distance. "I did… I do what is best for the Jedi, Padawan Darklighter."
Tahiri laughed bitterly at that. "No, Luke, you don't. You do what is best for you and yours. You always have. And for whatever reason, you don't want to claim your nephew's daughter as part of your family. Is it because she's my daughter? Or because she reminds you too much of the mistake you made sending us all to Mrykr?"
Kyp and Cilghal were both on their feet, and Tionne had her head lowered into one hand. Luke stared at Tahiri, his eyes cold and emotionless.
"That was uncalled for Jedi Veila," Cilghal responded.
No, it was true.
Kidan posted: Noelani dropped to her knees, and covered her face with her hands, as she began crying. She couldn't handle the Masters like this. She had always respected them, always believed that they were the best the galaxy had to offer.
They were supposed to be the epitome of the Light Side of the Force.
Poor kid. They're more concerned about their argument, and their decorum, than her?
Kidan posted: Yet, as her body shook with her tears, and the only person in the room that cared was Tahiri, as she laid a hand gently on the top of her head, Noelani realized something.
A fundamental truth slammed through her.
The Jedi were as flawed as every other being in the galaxy.
If not more so.
For a moment, she wondered why she had ever left Tatooine. Why had she left home and came all these light years in order to be abused over and over again?
I like the way that everything that's been building up in the opening two posts - and in the years and stories set bewteen them - slams home dramatically here.
Kidan posted: A sickening knot of pain rested where her heart used to be. Even her torture at the hands of the Yuuzhan Vong warriors had not hurt her soul this much.
Tahiri's hand disappeared from the top of her head, and then Tionne's musical voice was close by, and Noelani could hear the pain in it; a pale reflection of what her heart now was. "Noelani? Come on. Let's go and have a chat."
For a moment, she almost believed that Tionne cared for her. For a moment, her desire to see the good in anything and anyone almost won out. Then she remembered that this was one of the people who had decided that her Master, her mother, was not good enough to teach her.
Is she right? Impossible to say, but Tionne - even for the best of intentions - has let herself get caught up in the politics of the Council and the Order.
Noelani may be misbehaving, but she has a reason for it; she may be irrational, but she also has a point...
And maybe even the Force is with her?
Or, are the Jedi Council driving her into the dark, without even seeing that their actions create what they claim to abhor. Denying love, enforcing discipline...
You can see where the Sith get it from.
Kidan posted: Tionne's long, slender fingers touched her shoulder, and Noelani's head snapped up. She snarled, and with a quick flash of the hand pushed Tionne away from her. "I don't want anything to do with you!"
Then she was up off her feet, spinning as she fled the Council chambers. Dimly she heard Tahiri calling her name out after her.
As she pushed onto the stairs leading down, she heard Tahiri make a final snapped comment towards the Council. "Well, Luke, I hope you're proud of yourself."
I can't say I think Noelani's wrong here, one bit. I just hope that her and her mother are able to make it out of here together.
"Legacy of the Force" doesn't say that Noelani didn't join Jacen with Tahiri, does it?
- The Imperial Ewok
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A/T = OTP "To write one Solo twin as an angstbunny, Master Skywalker, might be considered unfortunate. To write BOTH that way looks like carelessness."
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Kidan
Title: TFN EU Staff
Registered:
Jul '03
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Date Posted:
6/22 4:10pm
Subject:
RE: Jedi Adept: A Path In The Dark -- Ch. 1 on 06/15/2008
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Thrawn McEwok
Serves him right!
so it does..
*nods* Typical. The question they want to ask is whether Luke should have any say in the decision, surely?!
heh, that's true..
... Thrawn McEwok, please?
with pleasure
:D It really looks the part. Where's Noelani off to?
thanks!!
Chase has found a sidekick? And we've not seen the other two before, have we?
something like that--and i'm not telling...
QFT.
I like the elegaic tone here; there's a sense of pride and destiny, but also one of worry, a sense this is a demand and an expectation. When we take that back to Luke, it's a little chilling.
exactly ! on all points!
I guess the desert gets cold very fast at sunset...
that it does
He's wise.
he's been around for a while
There was never any real doubt, any real choice, was there?
of course not. It's the JEDI...
Do the Jedi realise what they're doing?
Probably not.
i'd hazard a no...
Three things here: Noelani's excitement, honesty, and enthusiasm; the sense that the Jedi, the adult world, will betray and compromise it, controlling her and taking away her very optimism... and the hope that somehow, enough of Noelani's hope and strength can survive to negate and defeat the darkness that's coming...
beautiful intrepreation of why I had this scene as the opening for this bit...
Is Tionne's hair haloed by the sunlight? Or the electric light from her ship?
her ship, they turned away from the setting suns, remember
That's what the architects intended?
yup
Still, the description in itself is very good, enthralling and impressive. I guess style's not always a bad thing?
heh, that's what I keep saying...;)
Too easily? Too innocently?
*shrugs* she does this alot?
The unreliable narrator feels compelled to point out that she was born on Mon Calamari.
she was born on some asteroid out in the middle of nowhere...but it's from her POV
Interesting. Hope and control, again? It seems neutral, but it's a mix of good and bad, really?
aren't most big changes that way?
Just like that. Jedi simplicity?
just like that...
That's a quite Anakin-like reaction in its neutral observance of detail...
good!
And a Tahiri-like one in its emotion!
double-good!
Old enough to care about peer-pressure...
... but still young enough for moods to change like that!
she's a girl--a study in opposites
:D That was a nice introduction, a good flashback to establish Noelani and Kor's friendship, but also tinged by the knowledge of what happened in the previous story in the series - to them, and to Noelani's whole view of the world...
I hadn't realized the tinging bythe previous story bit... good catch...
[And I'm so tired I'm gonna have to postpone the rest of this for a few hours... I plan to get back to it ASAP, though! ]
EDIT: Okay! Here goes...!
Another stunning description, but a troubling one. For all its brilliance, Coruscant is unnecessary, and controlling.
exactly! It's all about control!
Interestingly ambiguous reference. Is the Yuuzhan Vong wildlife a good thing? Maybe not in itself, but it also serves to illustrate what Couscant does...
that was my intent... coruscant stifles life and nature....much like the Jedi if you think about it...
:p I think all that speaks for itself.
The divergence of diversity at the start both undermines and adds to the strength of Coruscant, but the emptiness of the Jedi HQ is really sharp, because unlike the more Outer Rim-like - and by implication, disenfranchised - districts, this is right next to the heart of government...
exactly!!
Also, once again, a funky piece of descriptive prose.
A very pointed juxtaposition. The Council themselves don't realise that they're corrupted? They think they're somehow exempt from the effect, and they don't realise the grief caused by the tension between the expectations imbued in the place, and the reality of human feelings?
no they don't. They firmly believe that they have a handle on things--and that they are the final arbitrators of what is good and right.
Idiots.
exactly!
Politics, personal pressure, and emotion. These people are NOT in a fit state to judge this, are they?
they're not fit to judge anything, IMO...
Somehow, this reminds me of Tahiri in the vivarium in Conquest. I guess it must feel similar; constraint, no escape, lives being "shaped" and defined by others in the name of their "greater good"?
another parallel which rushed past me...
Good question.
and one he doesn't want to answer
Does Noelani understand, though? Quite how wrong Luke's gone.
i doubt it... she wasn't there to see him before the Vong war...
Ambiguous. Does he secretly sympathise?
probably... family matters always hit Kyp hard
More political language. Does it help?
it's political language--of course it doesn't...
It certainly doesn't seem that the Jedi Council are listening, though.
they're not
Being unable to look past the anger to the message won't help, either.
now, if only the JEdi saw it that way...
Idiot. The outbursts are because of what he's done!!
*nods*
I like the use of 'sliced' there, btw.
thanks
No, it was true.
the hardest things to hear, often are...
Poor kid. They're more concerned about their argument, and their decorum, than her?
typical Jedi? look what they did to Anakin Skywalker...
I like the way that everything that's been building up in the opening two posts - and in the years and stories set bewteen them - slams home dramatically here.
Is she right? Impossible to say, but Tionne - even for the best of intentions - has let herself get caught up in the politics of the Council and the Order.
exactly. Tionne probably really does care for her, and my take was she was voting to not remove Tahiri--yet she's a good Jedi and will obey the will of the council...
Noelani may be misbehaving, but she has a reason for it; she may be irrational, but she also has a point...
that's true...
And maybe even the Force is with her?
she's a living, breathing embodiement of A/T of course the Force is with her...
Or, are the Jedi Council driving her into the dark, without even seeing that their actions create what they claim to abhor. Denying love, enforcing discipline...
*glances at title, starts whistling*
You can see where the Sith get it from.
that's for sure
I can't say I think Noelani's wrong here, one bit. I just hope that her and her mother are able to make it out of here together.
me too...
"Legacy of the Force" doesn't say that Noelani didn't join Jacen with Tahiri, does it?
no it doesn't... but it does imply that Tahiri is the only Jedi to join with Jacen...
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You sadistic Yank!! - McEwok No Krakana - http://nokrakana.wrighton.org Believe in the Constitution? Ron Paul '08
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Kidan
Title: TFN EU Staff
Registered:
Jul '03
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Date Posted:
6/22 4:12pm
Subject:
RE: Jedi Adept: A Path In The Dark -- Ch. 2 06/22/2008
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Tahiri watched as Noelani ran through the door to the stairwell. As the door slowly swung close, she turned back towards Luke and through clenched teeth hissed, "Well, Luke, I hope you're proud of yourself".
Her eyes flicked between the Masters, finally ending up on Tionne who stood next to her, watching the door that Noelani had disappeared through. A moment later Tionne's eyes slid away from the door to focus on Tahiri.
Pain and grief were evident on Tionne's lined face, making her look even older than before. Conflicting emotions warred in her chest for a moment. Tahiri managed a small smile, more of a grimace really, and then spun on her heel, and stormed from the Council Chambers.
With a flick of the Force, she flung the doors shut behind her, the boom it caused echoing through the small room, making the Padawan on guard jump in fright.
Anger boiled through Tahiri, threatening to consume her. For weeks, she had attempted to meditate the anger away, attempted to resolve the conflict in her heart. Yet it was constantly there, just beneath the surface, an anger, a hate, one that burned brightly in her chest.
She had yet to even consider forgiving Luke for what he had done to them. Something made even more inconceivable to her after this latest betrayal.
Her body tense, clenched, she stomped down the stairwell, heading towards the quarters that she had shared with Noelani. She moved through the Jedi Temple like a wraith, skirting the edges of the groups of Jedi that wandered the hallways, until finally she was at her quarters.
She stepped through the doorway, and pain slashed through her. The common room was right there before her, a mishmash of hers and Noelani's personalities. The room was decorated with a smattering of eclectic belongings; souvenirs from missions and training, there was even a shimmering holograph of the two of them on the Skorch fields of Ossus. That was sitting on a shelf in the corner, easily visible from Tahiri's vantage point by the door.
Everything about the room stung at her; painful reminder of everything she had lost; gained and then lost again.
Her fists clenched tight again, the pain from her fingernails digging into the flesh of her palms clearing her mind. She walked through the common room into the third bedroom, the one she had set up as a meditation room in what was beginning to feel like another life.
She walked to the center of the room, and exhaled, trying to calm the inferno in her soul. She sank down to her knees, and then twisted her legs together as she assumed a classic meditation pose. She closed her eyes, and began the simple breathing exercises that she had been taught her first year of training. The simple breathing exercises that were probably the very first thing she had ever learned at the Jedi Praxeaum.
With a jolt, she remembered that Anakin had been by her side when she was learning this exercise, his right knee gently touching her left; as they both had their eyes closed and listened to what Tionne was telling them.
Her mind supplied the appropriate memory.
Tionne walked through the ranks of the young Jedi. Anakin right there, their bodies so close, she could smell the shampoo he used.
"Inhale. Exhale." Tionne commanded them. She took a few more steps. "It's deceptively easy. Everyone breathes."
"Not everyone," Anakin had interrupted then.
"I'm sorry, Anakin? What was that?"
She could feel the burst of embarrassment from her friend, and for a moment, she was startled from the memory. She had forgotten how close their bond had been, even back when they were untrained students.
Then the memory once more exerted itself, with Anakin saying, "Not everyone breathes. For example the Gand don't breathe, but rather get the essential elements needed for respiration through consuming food."
Tahiri remembered giggling at this; at the look of exasperation on Master Tionne's face.
The Jedi Master had rubbed at her temple for a moment, and exhaled slowly. Then she had smiled at Anakin. "That may be, but there are no Gand in this room. Everyone here breathes."
"Oh," he had replied, and then once more closed his eyes.
Tionne resumed her circuit around the room. "It's a deceptively easy practice, yet focus on what you're doing. Think about the mechanics and then picture when you are exhaling, you're blowing out all the frustrations, annoyances, and all the emotions which are struggling to break your concentration. Then imagine that when you are inhaling, you're breathing in the serenity of the Force itself."
Tahiri felt her lips twist slightly at the memory. She hadn't realized then that what Tionne had been doing was that very same breathing exercise when she was talking to Anakin.
She focused on breathing. On inhaling and exhaling. On breathing in serenity and breathing out the anger.
Finally, she felt her mind beginning to calm. She felt the fire that burned in her chest begin to bank slightly. A wave of relief rushed through her.
She opened her eyes, and glanced at the chrono. With a start, she realized that nearly twenty hours had passed from when she entered the room and now.
Her stomach grumbled and with a groan, she leveraged herself up from the sitting position she had been in. Her joints popped as she stretched out. She looked around the small room which Nelani and she had decorated, and grief over what had happened slammed into her again.
She dropped back to her knees, her back curling as she leaned over them. A wave of sobs wracked her body, as she shook with the fierceness of her emotions. The tears streaked down her face, and she lifted a balled fist and slammed it into the padded floor. Lifting her head, she saw a vase on one of the shelves. It had been a naming day gift from Cilghal two years ago. With a snarl, she stretched out her hand and a wave of Force energy slashed out, and struck the vase. It shattered, and for a heartbeat, Tahiri felt better, cleaner.
Then the anger and grief crashed in on her again, threatening to engulf her once more.
She covered her face with her hands, and fresh tears shook her body. I, I can't do this… I can't be a Jedi anymore. I'm sorry, Anakin. I'm so sorry.
After what seemed like forever, her tears dried up again, and all she was left with was an aching, empty feeling in the pit of her stomach; an open, hungry hole, waiting to consume her. She pulled herself up, and stumbled out of the room, her eyes catching Anakin's saber where it rested on a shelf next to a hologram of him. Her shoulders hitched at his lop-sided grin, and she grabbed both items up off of the shelf. Cradling the saber and the picture in her arms, she walked into her room.
Little mementos were all around her, and she dropped the saber and the hologram onto her bed. Then moving in a daze, she grabbed the travel bag from her closet, and threw in half a dozen changes of clothes, and a few additional belongings.
Gingerly, she picked up Anakin's lightsaber and pushed that into the bag as well, then followed that with his hologram. Finally, she walked over to the shelves that lined the wall, and plucked up a few additional holograms, concentrating on the ones that had Noelani in them.
Putting those last few things into her bag, she walked out of the room. Crossing the common area, she stuck her head into the room which, until recently, was Nelani's. She inhaled deeply, smelling the gentle soap which her little girl used. Her eyes flicked around the room, noting the small gadgets that were haphazardly strewn around.
Her body hitched again, this time though she fought the tears.
She turned around and left the room, and then the apartment. Quickly, she moved down the hall, and thumbed the page button for the turbolift.
Ten minutes later, she was standing outside the Council chambers, staring at the closed door. Her eyes flicked over to the young Arcornian Padawan who was standing guard.
She stepped forward, placing her hand on the door. The Arcornian glanced at her, and swallowed nervously. "I'm sorry, Knight Veila, but the Council is in session and has asked to not be disturbed."
Tahiri glanced at him, and grinned. "It'll be okay, Padawan. I'll only be a minute."
Before he could reply, she pulled the doors opened with a slight touch of the Force. Once more the rooms reverberated with a loud bang. She suppressed a smile and walked in. Her head held high. Her steps even.
Inside though, her stomach was doing flips, and she wasn't sure if she wanted to scream, cry or just go hide in a closet somewhere.
"Knight Veila," Luke began, anger briefly clouding his features. "We were not expecting you; to what do we owe this… pleasure."
Tahiri's gaze flipped from one master to the next. Once she saw that she had everyone's attention, she focused on Luke.
"I've been doing a lot of thinking recently. Soul searching if you will. Pondering my past, my present, and my future. And I've realized something. You've karked over my life, Luke. More than once. And you know what? I'm tired of it all. I deserve better than this, and if this is how you treat your Jedi… well, I guess I can't be one then. So, I guess, this is good bye." She quickly looked around the room, her eyes lingering for a second on Tionne, and then she was once more focused on Luke. "I hereby formally resign from the Jedi." Tionne gasped, and Tahiri glanced over at her again. "Take care of my daughter, Tionne."
She pulled out her saber, and snapped open the case, carefully extracting the crystal from its interior. Closing it back up, she lifted her arm and then made a slashing downward motion, releasing her grip on the saber, even as she enhanced its speed with the Force.
A moment later she looked down, and saw half of the hilt of her weapon sticking out of the ground. She grinned slightly, as she realized it was right in the center of the Jedi Sigil which decorated the floor. Cracks in the marble spread out from the hilt in a spider web pattern; marring the perfection of the Jedi sigil.
Somewhat appropriate, she thought to herself.
She spun on one foot and calmly strode from the room. As she pushed the doors closed behind her, she could feel the Force erupting, as the Council devolved into argument.
Taking the lift, she went down to the ground floor of the Temple, and began her long walk towards the main entrance.
She had taken a dozen steps down the hallway, and then pulled out her comlink, and by memory entered a number.
It clicked with the connection and then a strained voice issued from the speaker. "Yes?"
Tahiri paused for a moment, closing her eyes. He sounds so much like his brother. Finally, she opened them again. "Hey Jacen, this is Tahiri. Do you have a few minutes?"
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You sadistic Yank!! - McEwok No Krakana - http://nokrakana.wrighton.org Believe in the Constitution? Ron Paul '08
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star_writer24
Registered:
Aug '06
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Date Posted:
6/22 5:44pm
Subject:
RE: Jedi Adept: A Path In The Dark -- Ch. 2 06/22/2008
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Awesome! Good for her! I can't wait for the next update!
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Never under estimate the power of the dark side. Do or do not! There is no try. Hmmmmmm.
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Thrawn McEwok
Title: TFN EU Staff
Registered:
May '00
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Date Posted:
6/22 6:33pm
Subject:
RE: Jedi Adept: A Path In The Dark -- Ch. 2 06/22/2008
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Kidan posted: so it does..
Ayup!
heh, that's true..
That was the problem when Luke had the vonduun crab armour developed so they could use real lightsabers in training. He took away all the clue-sticks.
with pleasure
:D It really looks the part. Where's Noelani off to?
thanks!!
And you dodged the question.
something like that--and i'm not telling...
Are you hiding something?!
Wait, no, you're just trying to confuse me!
" "
A/T FTW!
exactly ! on all points!
I guess the question is - can Noelani avoid Luke's fate? Or something worse?
that it does
*nods*
he's been around for a while
Yeah.
*random thought* Noelani's stepbrother is an Alliance Admiral.
of course not. It's the JEDI...
i'd hazard a no...
*nods* We seem to be in agreeemnt. Is that where things like the Jedi Council begin?
beautiful intrepreation of why I had this scene as the opening for this bit...
Was I right?!
her ship, they turned away from the setting suns, remember
That's what I thought. False light? Stage light?
yup
heh, that's what I keep saying...;)
Yeah?
*shrugs* she does this alot?
That's true. Interesting how repetition makes things shallower?
she was born on some asteroid out in the middle of nowhere...but it's from her POV
You know what I mean?
aren't most big changes that way?
Maybe, but I think they're more about potential?
just like that...
good!
You meant it to be?
double-good!
You meant it to be, again?
she's a girl--a study in opposites
A/T?
I hadn't realized the tinging bythe previous story bit... good catch...
Hey, you're better than you even realise!
exactly! It's all about control!
*nods*
that was my intent... coruscant stifles life and nature....much like the Jedi if you think about it...
Yeah. The Order, at least?
exactly!!
I got it right?
" "
no they don't. They firmly believe that they have a handle on things--and that they are the final arbitrators of what is good and right.
*blames Luke*
Are they a metaphor for canon?
exactly!
*sighs*
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