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Topic:
Things EU characters would NEVER say (humor)
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Raoul_Duke
Registered:
Jun '07
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Date Posted:
7/20/07 6:55am
Subject:
RE: Things EU characters would NEVER say (humor)
- Date Edited:
7/20/07 6:57am (2 edits total)
Edited By:
Raoul_Duke
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I didn't write it but its still worth posting:
The Emperor: It's not the east or the west side.
Darth Vader: No it's not.
The Emperor: It's not the north or the south side.
Darth Vader: No it's not.
The Emperor: It's the Dark side.
Darth Vader: You are correct.
The Emperor: Keep frontin' the Empire
To all you Vader-haters out there, we'll blow your planet up!
Darth Vader: What is thy bidding my master?
The Emperor: It's a disaster, Skywalker we're after.
Darth Vader: What if he could be turned to the Dark side?
The Emperor: Yes, he would be a powerful ally, another Dark Jedi.
Darth Vader: He will join us or die.
Darth Vader: We got death star.(Death Star)
We got death star.(Death Star)
We got death star.(Death Star)
We got death star.(Death Star)
We got death star.(Death Star)
We got death star.(Death Star)
We got death star.(Death Star)
We got death star.(Death Star)
And you know that we got it.(Death Star)
And you know that we got it.(Death Star)
Uncle Owen: Luke, get your ass over here right now!
quit monkeying around with that Damned landspeeder
where are them two droids i asked you to clean, boy?
Have you cleaned your room?
Luke: Uncle Owen, I know I'm on probation,
I cleaned the droids,
can I go to the Hachi Station?
I gotta lay away on the power converter,
but now you treating me like a scruffy nerfherter.
Obi-Wan Kenobi: Luke, use the Force and run,
Run to Dagobah, Run to Dagobah,
Luke, use the Force and run,
Run to Dagobah, Run to Dagobah,
Yoda: I'm Yoda,
I'm a solda,
I'll mold ya, and fold ya,
I thought I told ya,
don't be unwise judge me not by my size,
you wont believe your eyes,
watch the X-wing rise.
Luke:Yoda, why you being a playa-hata?
You know I must confront Lord Vader.
Yoda: But Luke not ready are you.
Luke: But there's a city in the clouds where their keeping my crew,
a Jedi's gotta do what a Jedi's gotta do,
so now Vader, I'm coming for you.
Luke: That's right Artoo.
Set a new course
we're going to cloud city.
Ah. Thats a mighty fine Gin and tonic
Why dont you mix me up another?
Darth Vader: Impressive, now release your anger,
you must have sensed that your friends are in danger.
Luke: Ow! why did you slice off my hand?
Darth Vader: It's imperative that you understand.
Obi-Wan would never bothered,
to tell the truth about your father.
Luke: He told me enough, he told me you killed him!
Darth Vader: Then there is something I must reveal then.
I'm your father.
I'm your father.
I'm your father.
I'm your father.
I'm your father.
I'm your father.
I'm your father.
Han: Knock him out the box, Luke.
Knock him out.
Knock him out the box, Luke.
Knock him out.
Knock him out the box, Luke.
Knock him out.
Knock him out the box, Luke.
-----signature-----
"It was by the actions of one person, the Jedi Revan, that you prevailed." - Canderous Ordo
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Furyan_Jedi_13
Registered:
May '07
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Date Posted:
7/20/07 8:09pm
Subject:
RE: Things EU characters would NEVER say (humor)
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(Inspired by an episode of Family Guy)
(Jaina is driving a car, and Jag is in the passenger seat)
Jaina: I don't see what your problem is.
Jag: Well let's see. Your mother shot me down, I was stranded on a jungle planet for two years, you cost my family everything, you made me get kicked out of the Ascendancy-
Jaina: You left out the part where I made you smash your head against the windshield.
Jag: Well, I don't recall-
(Jaina brakes suddenly, sending Jag flying head-first into the windshield)
Jag: Well, I suppose I walked right into that one.
Jaina: (smiling innocently) Don't blame me, it was Zekk's idea.
(Zekk leans forward from the back seat)
Zekk: Choke on that, flyboy!
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ZebulaNebula
Registered:
Feb '05
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Date Posted:
7/21/07 8:36am
Subject:
RE: Things EU characters would NEVER say (humor)
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Palpy: I like to sing-a/about the spring-a/and the flowers and the moon-a ...
-----signature-----
I Jedi mind-trick pushy salespeople ...
"You do not want to sell me jewelry/beauy products/shades/whatever."
They can take our lives, but they will never take our FREEDOM!
Feeling down? Have a mint.
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Lord_Vivec
Registered:
Apr '06
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Date Posted:
7/21/07 10:52am
Subject:
RE: Things EU characters would NEVER say (humor)
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Jacen: "Lumiya, your lightwhip makes my pee-pee go wiiiiiiiiiii!"
-----signature-----
Lord Sithis, Dark Lord of Entropy  Senator of the Disciples of Lady Lumiya and Lord Shadowspawn Avatar: Of Fire and Lightning: http://boards.theforce.net/non_star_wars_fan_fiction/b10808/28930140/p1/?5 Obama/Biden '08 
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Pelly-Welly
Registered:
Jan '04
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Date Posted:
7/21/07 2:08pm
Subject:
RE: Things EU characters would NEVER say (humor)
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Thrawn: And then he was, like, you sooooo made that pre-emptive strike. And I was like, like helloooo, I totally like didn't. And then he was like, you soooo did. And I was like, omg you liar, I like so totally did not! And he was like...
<3
-----signature-----
RIP, Bantam - ?? sep 05 --- 26 march 08
Have fun over the Bridge.
Fanfics in profile
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lieutenant_ketch
Registered:
May '06
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Date Posted:
7/22/07 7:58am
Subject:
RE: Things EU characters would NEVER say (humor)
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Luke gets into a coral skipper and puts cognition hood on and that feels around the ship, then smiles and gets out: "When you get into a coral skipper, it gets into you"
-----signature-----
"yub yub commander"
the bantha crows at midnight
hunted in the imperial lounge
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ZebulaNebula
Registered:
Feb '05
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Date Posted:
7/22/07 12:54pm
Subject:
RE: Things EU characters would NEVER say (humor)
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Han: Jabba, remove that bounty ... or else. *Holds up giant salt shaker*
-----signature-----
I Jedi mind-trick pushy salespeople ...
"You do not want to sell me jewelry/beauy products/shades/whatever."
They can take our lives, but they will never take our FREEDOM!
Feeling down? Have a mint.
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Raoul_Duke
Registered:
Jun '07
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Date Posted:
7/23/07 7:43am
Subject:
RE: Things EU characters would NEVER say (humor)
- Date Edited:
7/23/07 7:44am (1 edits total)
Edited By:
Raoul_Duke
|
ZebulaNebula posted:
Han: Jabba, remove that bounty ... or else. *Holds up giant salt shaker*
Chewbacca (in basic): Don't try him man! He's crazy, he'll do it.
[Stolen from SW Gangsta rap II]
Vader: It's the V to the A to the D-E-R, Vader. Reconstructin' the Death Star, with my slick suede suit that's black like tar. **** you up no matter who you are!
Child Palpatine: Unlimited power? Screw that I'm playing pokemon.
Padme: Oh Anakin you killed all the Jedi for me? How sweet.
-----signature-----
"It was by the actions of one person, the Jedi Revan, that you prevailed." - Canderous Ordo
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ZebulaNebula
Registered:
Feb '05
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Date Posted:
8/1/07 9:52am
Subject:
RE: Things EU characters would NEVER say (humor)
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Revan's holocron: Bane, you're such a n00b.
-----signature-----
I Jedi mind-trick pushy salespeople ...
"You do not want to sell me jewelry/beauy products/shades/whatever."
They can take our lives, but they will never take our FREEDOM!
Feeling down? Have a mint.
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ZebulaNebula
Registered:
Feb '05
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Date Posted:
9/17/07 12:53pm
Subject:
RE: Things EU characters would NEVER say (humor)
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Palpy(cowering before Mace Windu): Damn, I should've used Preparation H.
Han: *gestures to Gethzerion* She turned me into a newt!
General Melvar: A newt?
Han: I got better!
-----signature-----
I Jedi mind-trick pushy salespeople ...
"You do not want to sell me jewelry/beauy products/shades/whatever."
They can take our lives, but they will never take our FREEDOM!
Feeling down? Have a mint.
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Mad_Max0290
Registered:
Dec '06
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Date Posted:
9/17/07 2:18pm
Subject:
RE: Things EU characters would NEVER say (humor)
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Kyle Katarn: I think I am going to shave my beard off.....
Ackbar: You pitiful waste of water I should kill you
C3PO: Damn these Skywalkers.....always getting me shot or broken, or busted, or stranded...
-----signature-----
Fear is the mind killer.... Bene Gesserit teachings
For that one person in our lifes no action is too great.
Knight of the Templars
Better to Reign in Hell than Serve in Heaven
New Jedi Order Fan Club- HeadHunter XO
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Darth_Sabith
Registered:
Oct '06
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Date Posted:
9/21/07 7:30am
Subject:
RE: Things EU characters would NEVER say (humor)
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Luke Skywalker: I think I'll become a sith today
C3PO: I quit you can find another droid to get blown a part
R2D2: Forget beeping I'm just going to speak from know on
Palpatine: Since I was a little boy I always wanted a toy train.
Konobi: Jar Jar, just die
Vader: Great I forgot to recharge the batties
Jacen Solo: You know Luke was right.
-----signature-----
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Myriad_Daydreams
Registered:
Jun '07
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Date Posted:
9/22/07 8:17am
Subject:
RE: Things EU characters would NEVER say (humor)
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ZebulaNebula posted:
Revan's holocron: Bane, you're such a n00b.
-----signature-----
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ZebulaNebula
Registered:
Feb '05
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Date Posted:
9/26/07 10:47am
Subject:
RE: Things EU characters would NEVER say (humor)
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Ventress: Screw fighting, Kenobi! Let's go clubbing!
Qui-Gon: Have you seen my tie-dye Jedi robes, Master Yoda?
-----signature-----
I Jedi mind-trick pushy salespeople ...
"You do not want to sell me jewelry/beauy products/shades/whatever."
They can take our lives, but they will never take our FREEDOM!
Feeling down? Have a mint.
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Darth_Sabith
Registered:
Oct '06
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Date Posted:
10/9/07 8:43am
Subject:
RE: Things EU characters would NEVER say (humor)
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Master Yoda to Qui-gon: Why yes I'm wearing them 
Darth Vader to Obi-wan: Opps did I do that
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