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Topic:
The Church of Kyle
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MASTERPRENN
Title: JCC Man., who jus noticed his own title. You jerk
Registered:
Dec '05
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Date Posted:
3/20/07 2:45pm
Subject:
RE: The Church of Kyle
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GrandAdmiralJello posted:
I am not amused.
But the great bearded one is, and that's all that matters. 
-----signature-----
"When you see me, what do you see?
I see a big bushy beard and hair."
- Stephen Colbert/Cornel West
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Ganner_The_Hero
Registered:
Apr '03
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Date Posted:
3/20/07 3:52pm
Subject:
RE: The Church of Kyle
- Date Edited:
3/20/07 3:53pm (1 edits total)
Edited By:
Ganner_The_Hero
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Thought I'd provide a link to this thread, for some amazing facts about the Kyle:
the Kyle Katarn facts thread, by Kenobi_kid.
-----signature-----
Kyle Katarn: "The Dark Side? I've been there. Do your worst."
The Prophet of Doom of the Church of Kyle
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Ulicus
Registered:
Jul '05
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Date Posted:
3/20/07 4:51pm
Subject:
RE: The Church of Kyle
- Date Edited:
3/20/07 4:52pm (1 edits total)
Edited By:
Ulicus
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Praise be to Kyle Katarn!
If you are unconvinced by the Way of the Beard, then remember that even the Earth's greatest philosophers - like Plato and Aristotle - adhered to it.
Now, let all know your alligiance to the Master of Manliness through the recitiation of the Bearded Prayer:
Kyle Katarn, who art invincible
hallowed be thy Name,
thy Pauldron come,
thy will be done,
on Earth as it is in the galaxy far, far away.
Grow us this day our daily beard
And destroy the Dark Forces,
as we destroy those
who perpetuate them.
And lead us not to be clean-shaven,
but deliver us from evil.
For thine is the Pauldron,
and the Bryar Pistol, and the Beard,
for ever and ever.
Katarn.
-----signature-----
Recipient of Golden Ewok™ and Golden EwokTrooper™
Trip Cares
I think the whole point of KotOR II was that Kreia realised she was in a work of fiction
I want a Freedon Nadd comic.
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ARC-77
Registered:
Mar '06
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Date Posted:
3/20/07 5:29pm
Subject:
RE: The Church of Kyle
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GeithJiseo2 posted:
Thanks for the info, ARC-77! A pity those are only cameos, though. Kyle Katarn deserves his own book, I say!
There's still the Dark Forces novellas, but there's a thread in Lit saying about the same. There's a comic with Katarn set during the NJO in one of the later issues of Tales, too, that I've heard is pretty good.
-----signature-----
Arvel Crynyd didn't crash into the bridge of the Executor. Kyle threw his A-Wing at it. -CernStormrunner Antilles/Celchu '08  Summon bigger fish.
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000
Registered:
Oct '05
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Date Posted:
3/20/07 5:47pm
Subject:
RE: The Church of Kyle
- Date Edited:
3/20/07 7:15pm (2 edits total)
Edited By:
000
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Maarek > Kyle
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Barriss_Coffee
Registered:
Jun '03
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Date Posted:
3/20/07 6:41pm
Subject:
RE: The Church of Kyle
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Ulicus, your knowledge of the Sacred History of the Katarnian Ledgends is commendable.
I'm surprised there aren't any courses dedicated to the study of the Holy Katarnian scriptures in modern school systems. Obviously, students cannot study the scriptures themselves, because reading the very words of the holy texts will instantly turn them to ash. But students should study the annotated translations at the very least.
-----signature-----
Sadow '08
"...he shall be referred to from now on as Nuteray Gunpants." - R_Zion
Senator of the Disciples of Lady Lumiya and Lord Shadowspawn
26 Days until LSATSOM!
SAN HILL LIVES!
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CernStormrunner
Registered:
Jul '00
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Date Posted:
3/20/07 7:50pm
Subject:
RE: The Church of Kyle
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CallistaRieekan posted:
Thanks, I just snorted coffee up my nose. :P
You're welcome.
I hear it's good for your sinuses.
-----signature-----
"It is easy to find something worth dying for.
Do you have anything worth living for?"
*
I don't want my kids growing up in a world
where Greedo shoots first.
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CernStormrunner
Registered:
Jul '00
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Date Posted:
3/20/07 8:12pm
Subject:
RE: The Church of Kyle
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Just noticed something AMAZING.
Lucas himself is an avatar of not one, but TWO GFFA Deities!!!
-----signature-----
"It is easy to find something worth dying for.
Do you have anything worth living for?"
*
I don't want my kids growing up in a world
where Greedo shoots first.
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Barriss_Coffee
Registered:
Jun '03
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Date Posted:
3/20/07 8:42pm
Subject:
RE: The Church of Kyle
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Good catch!
.... 
-----signature-----
Sadow '08
"...he shall be referred to from now on as Nuteray Gunpants." - R_Zion
Senator of the Disciples of Lady Lumiya and Lord Shadowspawn
26 Days until LSATSOM!
SAN HILL LIVES!
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Evil_King_Wiggins
Registered:
Aug '03
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Date Posted:
3/21/07 4:01am
Subject:
RE: The Church of Kyle
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Cern, you are amazing. 
Evil.
-----signature-----
» My icons ( http://evilkingwiggins.proboards19.com/index.cgi?board=general ) » "Dude, you're pumping yourself full of way too much liquid self-pity. Try the tablets. They taste better." » "Your female Chiss icon makes my peepee tingle" - Jon_Goodfellow
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Ganner_The_Hero
Registered:
Apr '03
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Date Posted:
3/21/07 5:19am
Subject:
RE: The Church of Kyle
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000 posted:
Maarek > Kyle
Heresy! 
-----signature-----
Kyle Katarn: "The Dark Side? I've been there. Do your worst."
The Prophet of Doom of the Church of Kyle
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Randy1012
Registered:
Jan '07
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Date Posted:
3/21/07 5:28am
Subject:
RE: The Church of Kyle
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Anything that claims to be > Kyle is heresy. 
Wait...what about the Beard? Would the Beard be > Kyle?
::head explodes::
-----signature-----
What can I say? I'm a talented individual.
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Ulicus
Registered:
Jul '05
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Date Posted:
3/21/07 8:25am
Subject:
RE: The Church of Kyle
- Date Edited:
3/21/07 8:41am (1 edits total)
Edited By:
Ulicus
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Randy1012 posted:
Wait...what about the Beard? Would the Beard be > Kyle?
::head explodes::
There is only One that we venerate and His name is Kyle Katarn.
Katarn is, however, expressed to mortalkind by the Holy Trinity of the Beard, the Pauldron and the Bryar Pistol. (As in, "I badassaptise you in the name of The Beard, the Pauldron and the Bryar Pistol" - You have been badassaptised right?)
The Beard is Kyle, but Kyle is not just the Beard.
You must understand, The Way of the Beard is but one of the Three Ways (religious Orders) in the True Church of Kyle Katarn; the Order associated with evangelicism and conversion of those too blind to see the truth of Kyle Katarn (dubbed "Jerectics"). For, as Kyle said of the Beard,"It will grow forth and multiply", and as such that is the mission the Way of the Beard carries out, growing and multiplying the Church of Kyle.
The Way of the Pauldron is the Order associated with defense. Note, this is not the defense of the weak, or the defense of the innocent, but the defense of the only thing worth defending: the Church of Kyle Katarn.
The Way of the Bryar Pistol is the martial branch of the Church, and associated with attack. When the Way of the Beard fails in its mission, then the Way of the Bryar Pistol sets out to "sunder the shoulder", which is a symbolic term for "destroy the disbelievers". Likewise, those who leave the Church feel the full power of the Way of the Bryar Pistol, as it is documented in the terrible cataclysm that saw the eight thousand and eighty-eight of Nar Shadaa separate themselves from the glory of Katarn:
"And eighty-eighty eight left from Katarn seeking refuge on a ship. And Katarn did track down eighty-eighty eight and ask, "Leaving so soon?". In fear did eighty-eighty eight not respond and thus did the Bryar Pistol do its work and sunder the shoulder." - From the Second Book of Dark Forces
If you have any further questions, don't hesitate to ask.
-----signature-----
Recipient of Golden Ewok™ and Golden EwokTrooper™
Trip Cares
I think the whole point of KotOR II was that Kreia realised she was in a work of fiction
I want a Freedon Nadd comic.
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Barriss_Coffee
Registered:
Jun '03
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Date Posted:
3/21/07 9:49am
Subject:
RE: The Church of Kyle
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Dark Forces II was my first endeavour into the EU.
I still recall the day I learned of the Eighty-Eighty Eight. It traumatized me at the time, and the very memory traumatizes me till this day.
-----signature-----
Sadow '08
"...he shall be referred to from now on as Nuteray Gunpants." - R_Zion
Senator of the Disciples of Lady Lumiya and Lord Shadowspawn
26 Days until LSATSOM!
SAN HILL LIVES!
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Ganner_The_Hero
Registered:
Apr '03
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Date Posted:
3/21/07 11:33am
Subject:
RE: The Church of Kyle
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Barriss_Coffee posted:
Dark Forces II was my first endeavour into the EU.
Yes, mine too. In fact, it was my very first computer-game.
It still is my favorite.
-----signature-----
Kyle Katarn: "The Dark Side? I've been there. Do your worst."
The Prophet of Doom of the Church of Kyle
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