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Author	Topic: A story of my own...
Taryn Registered: Apr '00	Date Posted: 4/8/00 5:32am Subject: A story of my own... - Date Edited: 1/19/05 8:49am (1 edits total) Edited By: Herman Snerd
	This is my first time on here, so be nice to me and give your opinions on my story, please. It is called 'Remembering', so, here goes. The fading evening sun shone on the travelers going through the Shaderi Canyon Pass. The cardabeasts labored to pull the carts loaded down with supplies and the drivers were ready for anything that might happen to the wagons. Each riding on a Madrini bordok, a Jedi Knight and her Padawan Learner accompanyed the supplies. "Halt!" the caravan leader, Atkinad, called out. "We will camp here for the night!" As the workers set up camp, the Jedi talked together. "Master, we should arrive at the caves tomorow from what a driver told me. I look forward to returning to the others. With the Jedi Hunters out looking for us, I feel safer in a group." the Padawan said. "Shaela, do not allow yourself to be distracted. It will do Heracious and the others little good if we fail to get the supplies to them. We both must concentrate on the Living Force. I feel danger tomorrow." "Yes, Tahsh." the twelve-year-old girl paused for a moment, deciding if she wanted to continue. "Master, with everything that has happened under Supreme Chancellor Palpatine, what will happen to the Jedi Order if we are all killed?" Tahsh closed her eyes in meditation for a moment, seeking to know what to say. Finally, she looked her Padawan in the eyes. "The Order will continue on, but not the same. Of that, I am certain. Now, it is time to sleep. We will talk more in the morning." On the other side of the camp from the Jedi, Atkinad cooked meat over a fire. Through the snaping and popping of the fire, he thought he heard something. No. It was nothing. he thought. Then he heard it again. "Atkinad, over here." a voice whispered. The caravan leader stood and entered the woods toward the person calling him, recognizing the voice. "Jerill? Is that you?" I hope to get replies, and I will get some excitement added later.
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Fallon Registered: Mar '00	Date Posted: 4/8/00 11:55am Subject: Re: A story of my own...
	Sounds pretty good, so far. I'm looking forward to hearing more. Fallon -----signature----- "Bwahahahahaha! Moero, moero!!" -- Dilandau Albatou
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Herman Snerd Title: - Archive Editor Registered: Oct '99	Date Posted: 4/8/00 12:28pm Subject: Re: A story of my own...
	Good work on coming up with new characters and especially new names. I borrowed a lot of characters from the EU in my fanfic. I really only came up with two character's unique to my story. I like the idea of following the lives of certain Jedi as they are being hunted down. -----signature----- Have a question or suggestion for the Archive? PM Mariah anytime. Voted Dork Magazine's "Sexiest Nerd Alive" for 2008 http://i211.photobucket.com/albums/bb237/Snerdmania/DSCF0113.jpg A .jpg is worth a thousand .txt's.
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Padmegirl Registered: Mar '00	Date Posted: 4/8/00 12:50pm Subject: Re: A story of my own...
	it's really good so far keep posting!
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Taryn Registered: Apr '00	Date Posted: 4/8/00 7:25pm Subject: Re: A story of my own...
	Thank you! Here's the next bit. Enjoy! A figure in dark clothes stepped into the moonlight, revealing his young face. "Glad you remember me." "Do you think it's that easy for a father to forget his son?" "Enough of this little reunion, Atkinad. I have come to tell you that you have with you two Jedi, and that is as good as a death mark these days." "They are customers, nothing else. If they had no credits, they would have no help from me." "So you haven't forgiven them for taking me away all those years ago. Good. Then you won't mind hearing out my offer." "What offer?" "Tomorow, you are to stop the caravan for nothing. In exchange, I will leave your family alive, and you will live to see tomorrow night." "You would kill your own family?" "If the caravan stoppes, Atkinad, I will have a problem. I will have to decide if it's worse for a mother to see her daughter killed slowly and painfully by her son, or for the daughter to wittness the same being done to her mother. And you will be killed." "Jerill," Atkinad's voice was pained. "One other thing. You will tell nobody we spoke. And so you don't forget we did..." In a flash, an emerald green blade appeared and flew toward Atkinad. The caravan leader felt the flesh on his shoulder burn, and then the blade was gone. "That is a taste of what I will do to the family if you get in the way." "What turned you against us, Jerill?" "The Jedi." Sleeping near her Padawan, Tahsh Hapay felt a surge in the Force. In a moment, she was on her feet, lightsaber activated. Tahsh looked and felt around, trying to find where the surge came from, but it was gone. "Master, what is it?" "I'm not sure. There was a disturbance, but now, there's nothing. We better get back to sleep. I feel that tomorrow will be hard on us both. I know it's your thirteenth birthday tomorrow, Padawan, but you must not be distracted. Focus in the Force, not the mind." "Yes, Master."
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light_sabe_r Registered: Feb '00	Date Posted: 4/8/00 10:50pm Subject: Re: A story of my own...
	I'm liking this! Post more soon! -----signature----- @LIGHTSABE*R(:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: I am an Oldbie but I am not old... I want Boga! (And Obi too!)
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Taryn Registered: Apr '00	Date Posted: 4/10/00 12:57am Subject: Re: A story of my own...
	announcer:"And now, the next exciting chapter of Remembering..." Shaela awakened early the next morning and took in the peace of nature. She closed her eyes and reflected on her life. She gathered the Force about her to enhance her early memories, and wondered how many others could remember leaving their families. Gradually, the sun rose to shine warm on her face. "Everyone up! Break down the camp! Let's go!" The girl stood, somewhat annoyed by Atkinad's interruption. "I was done reflecting anyway." she said to herself as she stood. Before long, the caravan was ready to get moving again. Shaela jumped up on a bordok and looked over at Atkinad, noticing that his left arm was in a sling. Tahsh rode up to the girl. "Today, you will need to stay up front with me. I still feel uneasy about something. Oh, here." The Jedi Knight handed her Padawan something wrapped in leather. Shaela quickly unwrapped it, and found a pendant in the shape of a drop with three stones arranged in a triangle, a fourth in the center. "Oh, Master! It's wonderful!" "The outer stones represent committment, patience, and a sober mind. The one in the center represents a true Jedi at her best. Wear it and remember, my Padawan. And be aware today." "I will treasure it, Master." "Onward ho!" the leader called out. As the supply caravan traveled near the ravine to enter the Nicos Cauldron where the caves are at, Tahsh felt something ahead. The feeling of dread had increased. She pulled out a comm unit and flicked it on. "Heracious, you there?" "Cahn here. What is it, Tahsh?" a man's voice answered. "Heracious, I would like you and three others to get to the ravine as fast as you can. I feel uneasy about something, and I'm certain it has to do with the ravine." "I've felt a disturbance on this planet. I will get to the ravine. And as soon as we have the supplies, we're leaving this place. It's getting too dangerous." "I agree. Tahsh out." Next post, you will find out what's up with the ravine. I'll post it A.S.A.P.
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Taryn Registered: Apr '00	Date Posted: 4/11/00 12:40am Subject: Re: A story of my own...
	I guess I'm a bit faster than you post-ers. Well, here's the next bit anyway. "Master, I feel danger ahead." Shaela told Tahsh a few moments later as the caravan neared the ravine. "An ambush. That's what it must be. I feel that now." Without another word, the Jedi galloped her bordok up to Atkinad, Shaela following behind. "Atkinad, you must stop the caravan." she told him. "Why? The child need to use the refresher?" Shaela felt the sting of that comment. "I am NOT a..." "There is an ambush ahead." Tahsh interrupted. "If we stop now, my Padawan and I can clear the danger, and we can continue to the caves unharmed." "Listen, woman, you came to me to get these supplies to the caves as fast as possible. You know how hard it is to get cardabeasts going once they've stopped." "It is true that I hired you to get the supplies to the caves, but I assure you, if we continue, my feelings tell me they will be destroyed." "I have been running supplies for years, and not once have I been ambushed. We continue." Shaela had had enough of this, and she turned to her master. "Shall I make him listen?" she asked quietly, recieving a dissappointed glare from Tahsh. "No, Padawan. You wish to force your will on him out of anger. A Jedi does no such thing. Besides, I already tried back in Shaderi. He is too strong minded." "Stubborn would be more like it." Shaela muttered under her breath, recieving another glare from her master. "Atkinad, the caravan MUST be stopped. I do not understand why you would go against the warnings of two Jedi." When the leader replied, his voice was icy and menacing. "Let me tell you something Jedi Woman. I had a happy family once. A wife, a daughter, a son, then a Jedi came and took my son away to your precious Temple to be trained. I no longer have that son. A Jedi stole a dream from me. Stole away my son, and that's just the begining. So you ask why I would go against a Jedi? It is because I trusted one once, and I lost. The caravan continues." With that, the discussion was over, and the ravine loomed large before them. The caravan began to enter the ravine, and Tahsh turned to him one last time. "Atkinad, this is your last chance. Stop the caravan." All she got was a glare. She rode near Shaela. "I want you to get behind the ambush. Take care of them, but leave them alive if you can do so without putting yourself in danger. I will stay with the supplies." "But, Master..." "I believe you can do this, Padawan. May the Force be with you." The two grasped arms in farewell, and Shaela was off, climbing the volcanic mountainside, using the Force to guide her to her enemies. Finally, she reached the top and saw several men with blasters and projectile weapons crouched behind the boulders. Looking past them to the floor of the ravine, she saw that the caravan had stopped. 'Of all places, why there?' she thought, and then she saw. At the far end of the ravine stood a man in dark clothes, blocking the way. Tahsh rode up to him, said something to him, and faster than she could blink, two lightsabers ignited. Tahsh lept off her bordok as the man slashed at her, killing the beast. The men waiting in ambush open fired on the caravan, and Shaela attacked, slashing, jabbing, deflecting, dodging. She wanted to keep from killing, but once she would disarm any of them, they would throw stones, or rush her, forcing her to kill them. Tahsh was unprepared for the attack, but the Force protected her from the initial blow, and now, she found herself working hard to protect her life. This mysterious man was good, and she could only hope she was better. The man attacked with a verocity that indicated deep anger for the Jedi, and Tahsh found herself being driven back against the ravine wall. Knowing she would be in trouble if she continued any farther back, she lept over the man, doing a flip in mid-air, but he twisted his emerald green blade toward her, slicing her right ankle. When Tahsh landed, she stumbled on her wounded foot, and before she could regain her balance, the man raised a hand and pushed her over with the Force, thrust his saber into her chest, and quickly lept out of sight. While Shaela was busy fighting, a man armed with a fletchette launcher stood, aimed at the opposite cliff, and fired. The fletchette missile shot toward its target, and upon hitting it, exploded into several pieces, causing a rockslide to fall, burrying the fallen Jedi Knight. Seeing that his comrads were being slautered by a small girl, the fletchette man rushed at Shaela, who ducked under the attack and tosssed him over the edge. Suddenly free of enemies, Shaela looked around at the caravan. All the wagons had been destroyed, and dead bodies littered the ravine floor. She looked around for her master, called out with the Force, and found her presence, under the rockslide that nearly blocked off the far end of the ravine. "Master!" the girl lept down into the bottom of the ravine and rushed toward the rocks. There was a movement, and suddenly the Dark Jedi stood before the girl, and she recognized him. "Jerill Durrango?" "Suprized to see me again, wookie's pet?" Without waiting for a reply, Jerill reached out a hand, and Shaela felt such pain in her chest she fell to the ground. She looked up in terror to see the green blade coming down toward her, and she prepared herself to become one with the Force. I have to warn you, I'm leaving in May for most of the month, so I will post as much as I can until then
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Maelisaandii Registered: Feb '00	Date Posted: 4/11/00 12:41am Subject: Re: A story of my own...
	Coolness... keep it up!
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Miana Kenobi Title: Pacific Region RSA NSWFF Manager Registered: Apr '00	Date Posted: 4/11/00 4:11am Subject: Re: A story of my own...
	eek.gif WOW! This is good! -----signature----- You can't take the sky from me. He tini nga whetu e ngaro I te kapua iti. Dyslexics of the world, UNTIE!
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light_sabe_r Registered: Feb '00	Date Posted: 4/11/00 4:21am Subject: Re: A story of my own...
	Keep it up! -----signature----- @LIGHTSABE*R(:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: I am an Oldbie but I am not old... I want Boga! (And Obi too!)
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Taryn Registered: Apr '00	Date Posted: 4/12/00 2:21am Subject: Re: A story of my own...
	I love copy/paste! Makes it so much easier! Cirani Hancas flew with fairy-like wings above Heracious Cahn and the Wookie Jedi Krythraar as they headed toward the ravine. She saw the rockslide that burried Tahsh, and now, she saw the Padawan facing the man that fought the Knight. "Krythraar! Cahn! Hurry! I'm going ahead to help!" Cirani saw the girl go down and she dove. When she was close enough, she kicked the man in the gut and he fell backward. Cirani picked up the girl, and took off into flight again. "Hang on." she said to Shaela as she flew her back to the caves. "Tahsh." Shaela said weakly. "Don't worry, young one. Cahn will take care of her." Soon, the caves were in sight. "Geisha! Come quickly!" Cirani called out as she landed. She placed Shaela on the ground as the healer came out of one cave. "There was an ambush. We need you at the ravine. Have one of your students care after the girl, and I'll get you there." "Tari!" the healer called. "I'll take care of her, Master." Cirani lifted Geisha, and was, once again, headed toward the ravine. Cirani reached the ravine with the healer at the same time as the other two Jedi. The caravan had been completely destroyed, and dead bodies littered the ravine floor. "Look for survivors." Heracious ordered. "I've got to find the man who did this." Cirani announced, and she took off, again. Heracious and Geisha reached out with the Force to find Tahsh, while Krythraar looked for anybody alive. Geisha felt the dimming Life Force of the Jedi Knight under the heavy stones from the rockslide. Looking over to the stones, she saw a bloody and bruised hand reaching out. "Tahsh!" the healer called out. She and Jedi Cahn ran over to the slide, Heracious Cahn focusing on the stones and lifting them off Tahsh. As soon as she could, Geisha pulled the Jedi out and lay her flat on the ground. Reaching out with the Force, the healer discovered just how bad off Tahsh was. "I'll do what I can for her." Geisha told Heracious. "Go look for others." As he left, Geisha concentrated on Tahsh's wounds and began the healing process, afraid that she may be too late. I'd changed one detail of the story. Shaela and Tahsh, before they reached the ravine, had struggled to keep the inner peace, and when Tahsh contacted Heracious, he told her that he'd broken up a fight between two of the students, and thank the Force their sabers were at low power. I tell you all that because I'm posting from my word pad document where I'm typing it, and that detail might be important to know for later.
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Taryn Registered: Apr '00	Date Posted: 4/13/00 1:36am Subject: Re: A story of my own...
	Once again, I post to fast. Well, I've about caught up to what I have written already, so... Heracious heard a moaning under one of the wagons, and found Atkinad there. "Are you okay?" he asked. Atkinad looked over at the Jedi, startled. Then, he recognized him. "You! What are you doing here?" "I'm looking for survivors. All the supplies were destroyed, and we are a day away from the nearest town, but only minutes from the caves. Do you want help, or to be left here? It's your choice." "Of course I'll go to the caves. I have no choice BUT to go to the caves. Have you found any other survivors?" "Not yet, but we just..." "Rahhrawra!!" The Wookie Jedi called out. "Krythraar found one!" Shaela opened her eyes to find herself in one of the caves. The healer student, Tari, stood over her. Shaela immediately reached out to find her Master, but felt nothing. "How are you feeling?" Tari asked. "Where's Tahsh Hapay?" Shaela demended, catching the healer by suprise. "I, I don't know. I haven't heard anything since Cerani dropped you off and took Geisha to the ravine." "I need to find Tahsh!" Shaela said, trying to get up, but Tari pushed her back down. "You need to rest. I don't know what happened, but you've not fully recovered." Outside, one of the other Jedi students announced that the survivors had arrived, and Shaela managed to get out of the cave while Tari was distracted. Coming down the trail, Shaela saw Geisha and Heracious supporting a man with a leg wound. Behind them was Atkinad, and then came Krythraar, carrying Tahsh's limp body. Shaela stared in disbelief. Her Master, dead? The man who could have stopped it still lived? Shaela felt something build up inside her that she had never felt before. Rage. She was suprised at the feelings it gave her. The power it gave her. Before she knew what she was doing, her lightsaber was in hand, and she was charging at Atkinad with the intent to kill.
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Grand Admiral Zzyzx Registered: Nov '99	Date Posted: 4/14/00 2:06am Subject: Re: A story of my own...
	That poor girl. Loosing her Master on her birthday. And her Thirteenth too! Does she get that man? Does she turn? I'd started reading, and you've gottem MY attention.
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light_sabe_r Registered: Feb '00	Date Posted: 4/14/00 2:48am Subject: Re: A story of my own...
	Don't leave it there! Come on, more more more more more -----signature----- @LIGHTSABE*R(:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: I am an Oldbie but I am not old... I want Boga! (And Obi too!)
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Taryn Registered: Apr '00	Date Posted: 4/14/00 2:54am Subject: Re: A story of my own...
	Nah! I think I will just let you wonder a bit longer.
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