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Author
Topic:
Stop! Or my HoJo will shoot!!!
lokmer
Registered:
Mar '00
Date Posted:
5/28/00 4:48am
Subject:
Re: Is there any differance between Capture Cards?
There are major differences in how well they capture, how well they perform, and how nicely they play with your other cards. I'm particularly partial to the ATI's, because of the OpenGL technology and their seperate Graphics processor enhances relibility, but, depending on your sysconfig they can be a problem to set up (in some they literally drop in and run within ten minutes, in others it can take hours to get everything configured properly). Shop around, ask geek friends who know your system, know what you need, and get the absolute highest end card you can afford...Oh, yeah, and avoid WinTV by Hauppage.
-Lokmer
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[Red3]
Registered:
Nov '99
Date Posted:
5/29/00 6:14am
Subject:
Re: Stop! Or my HoJo will shoot!!!
"Oh, this was a great idea, Red. Nothing but gloomy passages and some kind of green slime dripping down the walls" Hiroko said.
"I'm sure we'll find something. Besides, isn't it nice now that we're all alone?" Red said.
"Why it is rather...what the friggin' fudge am I saying??" she suddenly caught herself and slapped Red in the face.
"Snap out of it, man!"
"What the hell!? What happened, I dreamt I was acting like a f*ckin' wuss" Red said
"You were, and I was acting like a bimbo. Now, Let's get back to the others and get them out of this scooby curse" Hiroko said.
"Um, why did you get out of it?" Red asked.
"Well, the writer of this post hasn't watched that many episodes so he can't make any sort of parody" Hiroko explained.
"Oh" Red said.
"Ho-Ho-Ho" a booming voice suddenly laughed and the sound echoed aroud the passage.
"I know that laugh" Hiroko said.
"Santa?" Red suggested. Hiroko slapped him again.
"No, stupid, it's..." before Hiroko could finished, a curtain was suddenly(elementary, my dear Watson) drawn aside and revealed Captain Switzerland lying on a dais. He had grown to an immense size and he was holding a can of "Beefcake 3000 -200% pure fat". Surrounding him were various scum (feel free to improvise), all looking nasty. Off to the side, two blocks of soggonite were visible.
"It's Jar Jar and iam!" Hiroko said.
"Gonk damn, that's a fat *ss!" Red said.
"I'm not fat", the captain said, "I'm big boned".
"No you're not, you see, when you walk down the street, people are gonna say, 'Gonk damn, that's a fat *ss!'" Red continued.
"Kill them now!" the captain said.
"That's the last mistake you'll ever make" Hiroko said, "free Jar Jar and iam or die, you fat piece of lard".
"I'm telling you, I'm not fat! Now kill them, you must respect my authoritah!" the captain screamed with rage. Suddenly (no, mr Bond, I expect you to die) the sound of blasters being drawn and force-pikes being activated silenced the chamber.
"This might hurt" Red commented.
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Jan lo
Registered:
Jul '98
Date Posted:
5/29/00 11:00pm
Subject:
Re: Stop! Or my HoJo will shoot!!!
Before the action could start, Jan-lo came in, dressed as an Ubese bounty hunter, leading the loin-clothed Obidiah on a short leash. She glanced around, grinned (but who can tell) at Red and Hiroko, and glanced over to the other side of the room, where the astute Jedi could see NiceGuy meet her gaze under the tusked helmet of one of Switzerland's guards.
"I found Obidiah" Jan stated the obvious. Obidiah looked a little wild, what with the collie fur sticking out in tufts from his slightly bloodied mouth, and a new piece of red gingham (like a small child's shirt) tied around his head.
"Well, let's get started!" Red insisted, reaching for his saber while Captain Switzerland stared in a mixture of horror and indignation.
Switzerland had just realized in his present condition, he would not be able to join in the fight. He thumbed his saber hilt out of habit, but could not muster enough pressure to turn on the blade.
"Right," Jan-lo said, letting Obidiah loose on the scuzzy looking crowd of gawking minions and throwing her helmet to one side. She didn't even bother to ignite her saber as she advanced on the two soggonite statues at the far end of room.
Obidiah leaped into action, tackling any random Gammoreans that happened to be in the room, while NiceGuy deflected blaster shots aimed at Jan, but took little other action. As the HoJo joined the fray, Jan and NiceGuy ignored all combatents, freeing the soggonite victims their only goal.
Red, Hiroko, Irish and Jole (never try to post Irish out of a fight) slashed through rank on (rank) rank of the Captain's troops, nearing the tubby leader and making him sweat with fear (and indignation), uselessly thumbing his swiss-army saber.
Meanwhile, NiceGuy's brilliant saber work had allowed Jan-lo to reach Jar Jar and Iam unharmed, and she calmly proceeded to flick the switches to release them from their hibernation. They fell to the ground, Jar Jar sputtering, "Hey, turn that back on! I was watching that!"
Jan-lo helped the ancient Gungan to his feet, and NiceGuy picked up the dazed HoJo Co-leader, and they just walked right out of the throne room and the fight.
"Hey! Where're ya goin'?" Irish called over his shoulder as he hacked three syncophants in half with one mighty orange and green blow, "We're not done here yet!"
"Yes, we are," NiceGuy replied. "We came for Jar Jar, and we've got him, so we're leaving. Anyone who wants to join us can meet us at the ship. We're leaving as soon as she's ready."
"But, the fight!" Hiroko said, concerned.
"Sod the fight!" Jan responded, "We're going."
"What?" all action in the room suddenly ceased as HoJo and non-HoJo alike stared in consternation (and indignation) at their old Co-Leader.
"But, you have to fight! I lured you out here to destroy you all!" The Captain whined, giving his useless saber a non-committal swing.
"I thought you were Neutral," NiceGuy commented, "Luring people out to your silly outpost of Neutrality to destroy them doesn't seem very Neutral to me."
"It's not," Jan stated flatly.
"I am! I am Neutral! I wouldn't have a Fortress of Neutrality if I weren't Neutral!" The Captain whined, "And it's a Fortress! Not an outpost!"
"Some Fortress. We just docked in your bay without any trouble," Red observed.
"That's right. And I thought all you Neutral people were blonde, good-looking and thin," Hiroko added, quick to pick up on this new tactic.
"Shut up! Shut up!!" Captain Switzerland started getting red and swelling slightly, "You people don't know how difficult it is to remain Neutral in these troubled times! I've been amassing wealth from my Neutrality, wealth and fame! But I have been missing out on all the action in the universe!"
"So you decided to lure the HoJo Knights out here?" Irish asked ascerbically (and indignantly), "you should have pestered the Gonks!!"
"Whatever!" Jan-lo said, undisturbed, "Keep your Fortress, we're leaving." And she and Niceguy carried the two hibernation-sick HoJo out the door.
Captain Switzerland grasped his puffy chest and seemed to have trouble breathing...
-----signature-----
www.rebellegion.com
www.rebelsquadrons.org
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NiceGuy
Registered:
Feb '99
Date Posted:
5/30/00 1:14am
Subject:
Re: Stop! Or my HoJo will shoot!!!
"How long does it take to warm up the ship?" Red asked.
"'Bout fifteen minutes, from a cold start." Hiroko said, checking her watch.
"Sounds like we've got some time to kill!" Irish said, except he said it with his characteristic accent.
"Yikes, that was bad." Jole grimaced.
Then they all shrugged and went back to slaughtering bad guys and their henchmen.
Jan and NiceGuy walked down the empty hallways of the Hewlett Packard. Silence descended as they moved farther away from the still raging battle. They rounded a corner and almost ran over Tellesto, Warbuff and that Guy. Tellesto was in the lead, waving a wand and mumbling to himself, while Guy was snatching at the wand, without ever recovering it.
Warbuff was the only one with quick enough reflexes to ignite his saber. "Hey, where you guys been?"
"Freeing Jar Jar and Iam." NiceGuy said.
"We're headed back to the ship." Jan added. "You coming or staying?"
"You mean that's it?" Warbuff complained. "We've wandered uselessly for an entire thread?!?"
"Looks that way." Jan said, bucking up her semi-conscious load and continuing down the corridor.
"It's not like we have to fight in every thread." NiceGuy said, still needing that mindless barfight to clear his head, apparently.
Moments later they arrived at The Mighty QWERTY Wing (extra crispy!) and put Jar Jar and Iam in medical beds. Jan grumbled as she went through the pre-flight sequence, while NiceGuy looked between the door, to see if anyone was coming, and Jan, wondering if she would really leave most of their group stranded on the Outpost of Neutrality (hah!).
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iamurme2
Registered:
Jan '99
Date Posted:
5/30/00 11:08am
Subject:
Re: Stop! Or my HoJo will shoot!!!
The group fought for their allotted fifteen minutes and then ran back toward the Mighty QWERTY Wing (signature edition).
They all cleaned up and set a course back to the HoJo's Howard Johnson hotel, but on the way they recieved a transmission from a rather distressed NiiceGuy on the plannet Happy Valley.
(the words we all fear)
to be continued. . .
<<OK. So I finished it out anyway.>>
-----signature-----
If sanity is a measurement, then who's the dipstick?
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Tellesto
Registered:
Dec '99
Date Posted:
5/30/00 1:48pm
Subject:
Re: Stop! Or my HoJo will shoot!!!
Nice ending...kinda ESB in a weird way.
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Darth Legs
Registered:
Jan '99
Date Posted:
5/31/00 1:35pm
Subject:
Re: Stop! Or my HoJo will shoot!!!
Yea! It's over!!! Remember, NiiceGuy didn't see Legs13 leave. He was tied up and being attacked with make-up at the time. And he doesn't know how many there are for sure, anyway. So, yeah. *evil grin* I'M NOT A DIET!!!!!!
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Jean
Registered:
Oct '03
Date Posted:
1/19/05 7:32pm
Subject:
RE: Stop! Or my HoJo will shoot!!!
Upping for the move
-----signature-----
I am a sock
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