Author Topic: **HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms
Koohii 
Title: Games: RPG d6 GM
Registered: May '03
6249_Veers
Date Posted: 7/3/06 6:53pm Subject: RE: **HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms
"This one, long have I used Farseeing and Telepathy to watch...
Always has he attmpting to Farsee using 1 pip of Sense and using perception rolls to scan the Horizon.
Never making spot checks on where he was, using skill focus to assist with what he was doing.
Experience and Skill Points, heh. Levels, bah. A Jedi craves not these things.
You are a MunchKin!"

"My father wasn't a PC Jedi Knight, he was an NPC on a space freightor with 4D in Astrogation."
"You never made Sense Motive or Perception rolls against your your uncle's Con or Charisma modifiers, did you? He wanted you safe and home as a LVL1 NPC, not running arround the galaxy with old Obi-Wan on some damn foolish crusade for Experience or Skill points to make level."

"Did you make that perception roll? They've shut down the main reactor. One more random hit in the aft quarter and the ship's hull structure points will be level 4 damage and we'll blow to pieces. This is a failed wisdom check, failed wisdom check. Where did the silver copy of me who was following right behind us go? Damn, I must have failed a perception roll against his Hide/Sneak."

 

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Create happy mediums: Free prozac to all psychics & Jedi
I'm met 6yo adults and 36yo children
Still working toward Ni-Kyu Go Ju Ryu
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Jedi Merkurian 
Title: Games: RPG d20 GM
Registered: May '00
6372_Mace Windu
Date Posted: 7/4/06 12:54pm Subject: RE: **HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms
"You can't! He has to stand trial!"
"He controls the Senate and the Courts! He has too many ranks in Bluff & Diplomacy to live!"

(later)

"Twenty!!! A natural TWENTY!!!!!!"

 

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Striking down can result in common side effects including fear, anger, aggresion, nausea, dry mouth, hatred, suffering, headaches, IBS, & in some extreme cases has been linked to lava burns
Please consult your doctor before striking anyone down
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Darth_Laudrup 
Registered: Jul '04
14839_Sarrissa Jeng
Date Posted: 7/4/06 4:35pm Subject: RE: **HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms
"Unlimited FORCE POINTS, Unlimited FORCE POINTS!!!"

 

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Heath Ledger: April 4th 1979 - January 22nd 2008... You will be missed.
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Indigo_Jade 
Registered: Apr '02
19249_20-Sided Die
Date Posted: 7/5/06 2:59pm Subject: RE: **HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms
"Track them!!! Make a Computer Use Check! They may come around for another pass!"

"Captain Needa, the ship no longer appears on our scope."

"They can't have dissapeared!! You must have rolled a 1 on your Computer Use Check because no ship that small has a cloaking device."




"Great Chewie, great!! Next time you might want to spend a Force Point to make a Fortitude Save to resist hunger when we are on a mission to destroy an Imperial Installation!"




"...and that, Lord Vader, was the last time they appeared on any of our scopes. Considering the Damage Reduction on our Star Destroyers compared to a tramp YT-1300, they must have been destroyed"

 

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It’s dangerous business, going out your door.
You step onto the Road, and if you don’t keep your feet, there is no telling where you might be swept off to...
A.K.A. Dread Pirate Kidd
WOW addict...
Currently reading: "The Last Templar"
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Jedi Merkurian 
Title: Games: RPG d20 GM
Registered: May '00
6372_Mace Windu
Date Posted: 7/6/06 9:06am Subject: RE: **HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms
"Through the Force, things you will see. The future...the past...old friends long gone."
"Han? Leia!!!"
*crash*
"Take 10, take 10! You must take 10!"

 

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Striking down can result in common side effects including fear, anger, aggresion, nausea, dry mouth, hatred, suffering, headaches, IBS, & in some extreme cases has been linked to lava burns
Please consult your doctor before striking anyone down
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Nktalloth 
Registered: Sep '05
39865_Darth Revan
Date Posted: 7/7/06 1:44am Subject: RE: **HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms
Obi-Wan: "I have the high ground Anakin! It adds plus 4 to my agility!"
Anakin: "Actually that's not nessecarily accurate."
Obi-Wan: "...What?"
Anakin: "See, if you read rulebook edition page 34, paragraph 4, subsection a, you can clearly see the rules regaurding position-based bonuses to attributes, and it clearly states that the high ground is only advantageous in situations wherein the approaching enemy is moving directly up the ground towards you, and in that case it'd be a plus 2 to agility, not 4. Now, see, the entire thing would be completely moot of course were I merely to execute a force jump over you and land behind you, in which case-"
Obi-Wan: "Force-push, rule lawyer!"
Anakin (falling into the lava): "I HATE YOU!"

Threepio: "Sir, the requirements to succesfully navigate an asteroid field are 20 ranks in pilot (starfighter), along with a series of natural twenties against your 2 ranks in pilot (starfighter) and your only d10!"

Palpatine: "My sense motive check has informed me of your player's urge to kill me simply to see the look on the GM's face..."

Clone commandos to Yoda & Obi-Wan: "WE ARE FODDER. KILL US NOW."

 

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We learn that ninja can walk on water from Tactics Ogre.
The only other instance of walking on water is Jesus.
Therefore, Jesus is a ninja.
Look for me in Sunrunner, SWG and in Gaurdian, CoV
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Jedi Merkurian 
Title: Games: RPG d20 GM
Registered: May '00
6372_Mace Windu
Date Posted: 7/13/06 9:30am Subject: RE: **HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms
"I can feel you anger. It gives you focus. Lets you roll more dice with Force Points!"

"You're no match for him, he's a Sith Lord!"
"Chancellor, I get a +1 to hit vs. Sith Lords."

"I sense much fear in you, Skywalker! You have hate, you have anger, but you'll be at -10 against me if you don't use them!"

"Anakin, you're a far greater Jedi Knight than I could ever be. It's only a matter of time before the Council lets you take levels of Jedi Master."

Sorry, RotS was on HBO a few nights ago nerd tongue

 

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Striking down can result in common side effects including fear, anger, aggresion, nausea, dry mouth, hatred, suffering, headaches, IBS, & in some extreme cases has been linked to lava burns
Please consult your doctor before striking anyone down
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Donp 
Registered: Mar '03
6595_Luke Skywalker
Date Posted: 7/13/06 6:56pm Subject: RE: **HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms
Jedi Merkurian posted:
"I can feel you anger. It gives you focus. Lets you roll more dice with Force Points!"

"You're no match for him, he's a Sith Lord!"
"Chancellor, I get a +1 to hit vs. Sith Lords."

"I sense much fear in you, Skywalker! You have hate, you have anger, but you'll be at -10 against me if you don't use them!"

"Anakin, you're a far greater Jedi Knight than I could ever be. It's only a matter of time before the Council lets you take levels of Jedi Master."

Sorry, RotS was on HBO a few nights ago nerd tongue


No don't apologize, that's actually quite good. What's the thing about Anakin being at -10 against Dooku? Somehow I like it, shows the power of the dark side. Is it from the d6 game?

 

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Jedi Merkurian 
Title: Games: RPG d20 GM
Registered: May '00
6372_Mace Windu
Date Posted: 7/14/06 7:16am Subject: RE: **HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms
It's from the d20 system. There's a dark side skill called Fear. You magnify the "dark side" feelings in your opponent, and based on your skill check, that person takes a penalty on saves, attack rolls, and skill checks as they combat those feelings ("You have hate, you have anger, but you do not use them!") The only way to negate the penalty is to give in to those feelings and accept a Dark Side Point.

We know how that turned out when Tyranus used it on Skywalker... whistling

 

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Striking down can result in common side effects including fear, anger, aggresion, nausea, dry mouth, hatred, suffering, headaches, IBS, & in some extreme cases has been linked to lava burns
Please consult your doctor before striking anyone down
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Rogue_Thunder 
Registered: Jan '03
14369_Vader Concept
Date Posted: 7/14/06 10:39am Subject: RE: **HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms
"Is the darkside stronger?"

"No, only easier, more seductive, more dice they let you roll on your Force Points."

 

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I'll fly a starship across the universe divide
And when I reach the other side
I'll find a place to rest my spirit if I can
Perhaps I may become a highwayman again
Or I may simply be a single drop of rain, but I will remain, and I'll be back again...
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Jedi Merkurian 
Title: Games: RPG d20 GM
Registered: May '00
6372_Mace Windu
Date Posted: 7/14/06 11:27am Subject: RE: **HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms - Date Edited: 7/14/06 11:49am (1 edits total) Edited By: Jedi Merkurian
"Watch that combined fire, boys!"

"Good roll, Janson!"


"...and he had Exotic Weapon Proficiency (lightsaber). My only conclusion is that it was a Sith Lord."
"I do not think the Sith could've returned without us making a Farseeing check."
"Mmmm...a high DC the dark side causes!"

 

-----signature-----
Striking down can result in common side effects including fear, anger, aggresion, nausea, dry mouth, hatred, suffering, headaches, IBS, & in some extreme cases has been linked to lava burns
Please consult your doctor before striking anyone down
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Koohii 
Title: Games: RPG d6 GM
Registered: May '03
6249_Veers
Date Posted: 7/17/06 6:25pm Subject: RE: **HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms
Qui-Gonn: We are taking these people to Coruscant.
Droid: /upload inquiry/ \download response\ #inquiry# "Where are you taking them?"
Qui-Gonn: To Corruscant
Droid: /upload response/ \download orders\ #bluff--stall for time# "um, er?"
Central computer: How witty. \orders: intimidate\ \restrain offenders\
Droid: /you've got to be kidding? He's got at least 8 levels behind him. I have only 3 ranks in Intimidate and a measly +2 stat bonus. Even with the best modifiers and circumstances, he's not going to be impressed. And now thanks to the delay, he's suspicion circuits are active. Thanks a great heap./
CC: \Nope. Obey orders. I'll use my Command skill plus my leadership feat on you if you don't obey immediately\
Droid: /poodoo!/ "Halt! You're under arrest!"
<insert lightsaber fight>
Droid: /Wow, that worked/
CC: \Really? I'm receiving damage reports from other units in your area, and others have deactivated without permission.\
Droid: /of course not really. Make a sense motive roll, would ya?/
CC: \oh, I see...\
Droid: /Uploading visual memory for future analysis and review. Recommendations: do not use STD Mk 1 Battle droids to restrain jedi./
CC: \yes, yes... You're suggestions will be given the consideration they'r due\ |deleting file| \Updating duty rosters to reflect current unit availability. Noting unauthorized and unorthodox deactivation of Battle Droids in your service area. Issuing demerrits for failure to obey orders to your record.\ |initiate computer programming and bureaucrasy rolls to cover my cybernetic posterior|
Droid: /... thank you. Your instructions have beennnnn mmmmoossssst hhhhhelllllpp-ffffulllll... ...pOwwwwrrrr fayyyyyyl-innnnnnnnnnng./
CC: \You are the weakest link in the chain of command. Goodbye.\

 

-----signature-----
Create happy mediums: Free prozac to all psychics & Jedi
I'm met 6yo adults and 36yo children
Still working toward Ni-Kyu Go Ju Ryu
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Fandomar 
Registered: May '04
20863_A'Sharad
Date Posted: 7/17/06 6:58pm Subject: RE: **HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms
"So this is how democracy dies with a good diplomacy roll"

"Never tell me the odds, anybody can roll a 20"

Did you know the legend of Darth Plagueis the wise?
Anakin: I don,t have ranks in knowledge (sith Lore) let me make an intelligence check

"Size matters not is the weight of the object and your ranks in move object that matters"

"I,m looking for someone"

"found you someone did you do?"

"(heck another low result in my dice when will I found this Yoda?)"

"Only two there is no more no less a master and an aprentice"

"but who get the critical hit the master or thew Apprenttice?"


Anakin: "I have bring peace and justice to my new empire"

Obi-Wan: "wow somebody got a low wisdom score"

Han: better let the Wookie win

C-3PO: "nobody bothers in upseting a Droid"

Han: "a Droid usually don,t have a +4 bonus on bonus Strenght"

Luke: "I can,t believe it how we did get trought that"

Obi-Wan: "There is a Skill called Affect Mind that you could learn by taking the alter feat"

Palpatine: "The Dark Side Of The Force is a path which leads to many abilities that some consider unnatural"

Anakin: "Wait a minute, you mean like strenght, Dex, CON,iNT Etc?

Palpatine: " No your idiot I mean the force skills didn,t you check the back of your character record sheet?



Obi-Wan: "why do I sense we,ve picked up another patethic life form?"

Qui-Gon: "Didn,t you have the sense feat?"

Obi-Wan: "who is fooler the one with int 13 or the one with int 14?

Obi-Wan: If you would give more time with adventures and campaigns instead of your stupid Jokes you would be better than Yoda"

Anakin: "I think I already was"

Obi: "Don,t bluff yourself my very young padawan"

Obi: "Are they friendly 8refering to the kaminoans)"

Dexter: "It depends"

Obi: "Depends on what Dex?"

Dexter: "On your charisma score"

Obi-Wan: "This is Han Solo an Scoundrel 6/ soldier 2 captain of the milleniun falcon and this is his first officer Chewbacca they could tkae us to alderaan if wwe can make a good diplomacy check"

The emperor is coming?

Vader: And he doesn,t have so few Dark Side Points as me.



"Two starfighters agaisnt a star destroyer?"

Leia: "We,re on the rebellion we can score some great critical hits in the movies

"You will note that the clones are more capable than the droids they can use force points and the,re more like PC,s than the droids besides The Clones are not stoped by a lucky shot from a 9 years old kid"


Padme: "We must capture Dooku if we caught him we could get a lot of experience... I mean end the war sure"


Shmi Skywalker: "I can explain it it,s like if he has.... "

Qui-Gon: "(instead of special powers) the force-sensitive feat?"

C-3po: "My name is C-3PO and i,m afluent in almost every language unless I get less than 5 n my check roll"

"The power to destroy a planet is insignificant comparer to an 18 level character and his 20 level master (that obviusly can control te man who shut that laserbeam capable of destroying a planet)"


"Your great amount of sense motive in order to not buying that crap of the power to destroy a planet is disturbing"



"If we really come to war you must realice tha there are will not be enoguh Jedi to protect the galaxy we,re Guardians of the peace not soldiers, well there are some multiclassed but it is unheard off)"

"The Jedi use the force for knolwledge and defense never for attack"

"And what about force grip, force strike?They don,t give dsp anymore and even folks like Quinlan Vos used Force Lighting"

"Fear is the path to the Darkside"

"not if I don,t take a Dark Side Point for that skill"

Luke: "that tree I sense a penalty in my force skills"

Luke: "Oh no Tusken Raiders, they,re the worse (for a 1 level character)"

Han Solo: "and who is gonna fly it kid you?"

Luke: "Sure I,ve got a +10 pilot skill"

Vader: "There is a big bounty for the milleniun Falcon of course that depends on your profesion (bounty Hunter skill)

Padme: " Oh Anakin is not a Jedi Knight yet his just a level 5 Jedi Guardian "


"Hey kid be careful I,ve been condenmed in more than 12 systems"

Obi: "He,s not wort it he will just give you 200 XP "


Luke: " The Force is strong in my family, my father haad it, I have it and my sister.."

Leia: "I know I,ve checked my character record sheet"































 

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dizfactor 
Registered: Aug '02
6896_Obi-Wan<br>LEGO
Date Posted: 7/18/06 12:32am Subject: RE: **HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms - Date Edited: 7/18/06 12:36am (2 edits total) Edited By: dizfactor
DARTH VADER: When I left you I was but a male Human Fringer 1/Jedi Guardian 5/Jedi Ace 2/Jedi Weapon Master 3/Sith Lord 2, now I am a male Human Fringer 1/Jedi Guardian 5/Jedi Ace 2/Jedi Weapon Master 3/Sith Lord 7. Plus, I've got all these bonuses for my custom armor.

OBI-WAN: You can't win, Darth. If you strike me down, I shall finally get a use out of that Luminous Being feat I took instead of Two-Weapon Fighting a few levels back.

LUKE: How did my father die?
GM: Luke, you're going to need to roll your Sense Motive against Obi-Wan's Bluff.

DARTH VADER: You are free to use any methods necessary, but none of those twinked out disintegrators from the Arms & Equipment Guide. It's like make your Fort save or die. Talk about broken!
BOBA FETT: As you wish.

C-3PO: I'm rather embarrassed, General Solo, but it seems I rolled a 1 on my Diplomacy check and now you are to be the main course at a banquet in my honor.

DARTH VADER: I see you have constructed a new lightsaber. You have a lot of ranks in Craft (Lightsaber), and probably spent a month meditating to get your DCs down on those attribute checks. Indeed you are powerful, as the Emperor has foreseen.

YODA: When nine hundred years old your species reaches on the Aging chart, a more severe penalty to Charisma, you will be forced to apply.

AMIDALA: I will sign no treaty, senator. You're going to need a better role than that on your Diplomacy check if you want to play with the big dogs.

ANAKIN: I don't like sand. It's coarse, rough, irritating and it gets everywhere. Penalties to Repair checks, Fortitude saves to avoid damage from environmental hazards...

ANAKIN: I pwned them. I pwned them all. They're dead. Every single one of them. And not just the men, but the women, and the children, too! They're only like Challenge Code B, and I have Great Cleave, so it only took like two rounds to just mow down the whole village. I racked up a bunch of DSPs and didn't get much experience at all. It sucked!

JANGO FETT: I'm just a simple male Human Scout 4/Soldier 6/Bounty Hunter 5, trying to make my way through the universe.

ANAKIN: Love won't save you, Padmé, only the special abilities from my new prestige class can do that!

ANAKIN: (rolls a 1 on Sense Motive and completely changes the course of the campaign) Liar! You're with him! You brought him here to kill me!

YODA: Death is a natural part of life. Rejoice for those around you who get a chance to roll up a new character.

ANAKIN: I've gone up six levels since the last time we met, Count.

MACE WINDU: Very dangerous putting them together. I don't think the boy can handle it. Hayden always plays these characters who screw us over. Like that one time, we were playing this D&D game, and I had this paladin, right? And...
OBI-WAN KENOBI: With all due respect, Master, doesn't he have that Heroic Quality that the GM gave him? I think it's called "Chosen One"?
MACE WINDU: So his character sheet says.
YODA: Totally botched our Farseeing roles, we may have.

ANAKIN: Is it possible to learn this power?
PALPATINE: Not without taking levels in Sith Lord.

MACE WINDU: The Senate will decide your fate.
PALPATINE: Have you even seen my Diplomacy score? And my Reputation bonus? Plus, I've got Influence and Famous and Political Pull and Skill Emphasis (Diplomacy), not to mention a +2 synergy bonus from having 5 ranks in Knowledge (politics). Just bring it, tough guy.

DARTH VADER: Where is Padme? Is she safe? Is she alright?
PALPATINE: I told you already, Natalie went out to a party with her new boyfriend, and the GM got sick of her flaking out on game sessions and killed off her character.
DARTH VADER: She... she couldn't have! She was just going to stop on the way for chips! She texted me to say she would be here! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

 

-----signature-----
"Play is going to be for the 21st century what steam was to the 19th century."
Julian Dibbell
"You gotta love an elite killing force that you can fool by putting on a hat."
Gryph
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Fandomar 
Registered: May '04
20863_A'Sharad
Date Posted: 7/18/06 7:17am Subject: RE: **HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms
Yoda: Death is a natural part of life. Rejoice for those around you who ded (only they PC are death idiota).

Dooku: "You must join to me Obi-Wan and toghether we will make a good party"

Yoda: "Still much to learn to go to 20 level do you have"

Sidius to Maul: "Let them make a high initiative roll then you will surpass them with your high attack bonus and your two-weapon fighting ability "

Maul: "As you wish my master"


Qui-Gon: "Why do you think i,m a Jedi?"

Anakin: "I cheked your character record sheet"

Qui-Gon:" What if I killed a Jedi and took his lightsaber?"


Anakin: "There are not low-level Jedi in the movies..."


Qui-Gon: "I see you have a high rank in Sense motive "



Darth Sidius: "To cheat death is a power that only one has achieved as a house rule skill and a very bad one, but together we can convince our gamemaster to bring back that stupid rule"


Luke: "That tree what,s in there?


Yoda: "A chance to make a will saving trow and to use the Dark Side sourcebook"

Luke: "Is the Dark side stronger?"

Yoda:" No, no only if you take low dice rolls"

Palpatine: ¡Good.... Good now use your rage feat¡

Palpatine: Good... Good I can make an emphaty check and feel your anger

Qui-Gon: "will he be trained?"

Windu: "No he,s too old he has levels in the fringer class"

Obi-Wan (refering to Jar-Jar): " Who is this?"

Qui-Gon: "Another stupid NPC"



Anakin: " I heard something about midi.. what,s that?"

Qui-Gon: "The Midiclorians are a way to show that you have the chosen one special quality"



Anakin: "I kill themm all and not just the man, but the childrens, and the women too and I ha,ve only recieved 3 DSP for that"


Luke: "I,m Looking for a great 20 level character"


Yoda:"mmmm levels don,t make someone big"




Luke: "The Force?"

Obi: " The force is a feat the will give you acces to special feats and skills "

Obi: "They,re using a 15 level bounty hunter called Jango Fett to create a Clone army"

C-3PO: "No more adventures... it,s been a long time since I have raised a level"


Leia: "Help me Obi-Wan kenobi you,re my only high level hope"


Mon Montha: "Han it,s your party assembled?"


Padme: "Agresive negotiations what,s that?"

Anakin: "Like diplomacy rolls but with a lightsaber"

Yoda: "A low rank in farseeing do we have if this clone army we couldn,t see"


Obi: "why did it take you so long?"

Anakin: "Sorry master I could,n find a speeder with a good amount of hull points and shield points and the stats I like"

Dooku: "Back Off I have more levels than you as a Jedi Guardian and more skills and feats"

Obi: "I don,t think so"

Leia: "you have your moments when you get 20 there,re few but you had it"

Han: "Wait a minute this is not an asteroid it,s a new creature featured in the ultimate adversaries guide"


Anakin (refering to Obi-Wan): "He has good phisical stats as master windu and good mental stats as master Yoda"


Lando: "We just use this facility to freeze objects there are not written rules for peopple yet"

Darth Vader: "If you only knew the skills and feats of the dark side"



Qui-Gon (refering to Darth Maul): "He knew the arts of the Jedi and besides I picked behind my GM screen and saw that he was a Sith Lord"


Luke: "How did my father died?"

Obi: "A young dicipled of mine went to the dark side and taked some leveles in the sith lord prestige class betrayed your father and killed him"


Luke: "Why didn,t you tell me Vader was my father?"

Obi: "I though you could make a good computer use check and see it on the holonews"


Lando to Nien Nub: "I told you they don,t know we were coming unless we failed our sense motive cheks"

Luke (To 3-PO): Tell them tha you,re a Force Adept if they don,t free us


Han (after being torutred in cloud city): "They didn,t even make an Gather information chek or an intimidate chek"


Dooku: "What if I told you that there is a Sith Lord controlign the senate?"

Obi: "That,s impossible at least one Jedi would succed in a Sense mpotive check"


Luke: "It,s not impossible on tatooine I hunted womp rats of 2 mters and make some good critical hits"


















































 

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