| Author |
Topic:
**HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms
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Jedi Merkurian
Title: Games: RPG d20 GM
Registered:
May '00
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Date Posted:
7/18/06 12:04pm
Subject:
RE: **HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms
- Date Edited:
7/18/06 12:11pm (1 edits total)
Edited By:
Jedi Merkurian
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Anakin: I've gained six more levels in Jedi, Count!
Dooku: Good! Twice the levels, double the fall!
Anakin: And then we started agressive negotiation.
Padme': Agressive negotiations?
Anakin: Yeah, negotiations using Intimidate instead of Diplomacy.
-----signature-----
Striking down can result in common side effects including fear, anger, aggresion, nausea, dry mouth, hatred, suffering, headaches, IBS, & in some extreme cases has been linked to lava burns
Please consult your doctor before striking anyone down
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Fandomar
Registered:
May '04
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Date Posted:
7/19/06 9:30am
Subject:
RE: **HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms
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Yoda: "How do you feel?"
Anakin "Cold sir"
Yoda: "Fear do you have, see trough you with emphaty we can"
Anakin " And what does fear have to do with any of this?"
Yoda: "Is vital fear leads to a Dark Side point then you will take the rage feat and then you will not be able to use lioght side points...."
Yoda:"The GM DC clouds everything..."
Yoda: "pain, suffering tree Dark side points I feel"
Windu: "This party is over"
Dooku: "I,m not playing a party just myself and the GM npc,s
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Nktalloth
Registered:
Sep '05
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Date Posted:
7/20/06 12:07am
Subject:
RE: **HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms
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C3PO: ...You will be fed to the Sarlaak, where you shall take (1d4)/10 dmg per turn untill death, with no saving throws.
Akbar: (Rolls critical success on a combination of sense motive, leadership, and tactics) It's a trap! Run aways! The Death Star is still operational!
Yoda: How you get so many hp, eating food like this?
GL: As you walk into the asteroid, you are ambushed by bugbears! Roll initiative!
Harrison Ford: This isn't D&D, George.
GL: I'm George Lucas. You get attacked by bugbears.
Harrison Ford: I hate you so much...
Harrison Ford: I fire my blaster!
GL: What are you attacking?
Harrison Ford: I'm attacking the water!
GL: Hamill, make a saving throw against Vader's attack.
Mark Hamill: D***it! Um, 20.
GL: ...He cuts your hand clean off.
Mark Hamill: Aw.
-----signature-----
We learn that ninja can walk on water from Tactics Ogre.
The only other instance of walking on water is Jesus.
Therefore, Jesus is a ninja.
Look for me in Sunrunner, SWG and in Gaurdian, CoV
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Fandomar
Registered:
May '04
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Date Posted:
7/22/06 7:16am
Subject:
RE: **HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms
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Harrison: "(make a comment about GL mom"
GL: "Ok then the millenium Falcon didn,t get into hyperspace"
Luke:" I want to learn about the force and become a Jedi like myfhather before me"
Obi-Wan;then you will have to take some classes as Jedi ace and Jedi weapon master... ejem and a few dsp"
Han Solo:" Mynocks there,re low-level scavengers"
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Koohii
Title: Games: RPG d6 GM
Registered:
May '03
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Date Posted:
7/30/06 1:32pm
Subject:
RE: **HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms
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"Moscht PCs have a Force Point. And Moscht PCs watch is slowly fade away. But it you expend it at the right time, in the right plaisch, you can achieve something... Gloriousch."
OK, so it was a Highlander quote, and a Highlander2 quote at that. <hangs head in shame> Was probablly the only good line in any of the sequels.
-----signature-----
Create happy mediums: Free prozac to all psychics & Jedi
I'm met 6yo adults and 36yo children
Still working toward Ni-Kyu Go Ju Ryu
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Gry Sarth
Registered:
Jun '99
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Date Posted:
7/30/06 7:21pm
Subject:
RE: **HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms
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Couldn't remember that quote Kohii, but I loved the Connery accent!
-----signature-----
If it weren't for bad luck I'd have no luck at all.
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Koohii
Title: Games: RPG d6 GM
Registered:
May '03
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Date Posted:
7/31/06 3:34pm
Subject:
RE: **HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms
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Other non-SW movie quotes converted to gaming terms:
"We're going to need a walker-scale boat."
"A force-point for all of us, each and every one."
"Why do you wanna win this race so bad foah?"
"For the Dark side. One big victory for the dark side."
"Light side... Dark side... I'm the one with the blaster carbine (5d)"
"Did you make a successful incantation roll."
"uh, yeah?"
"You're sure?"
"Look, maybe I rolled a 1, but that doesn't mean I didn't do my job."
"Idiot! You've just opened up a whole new plot for the GM, costing the lives of countless NPCs."
"Yeah, but I expanded the adventure by a full gaming session. More XP for me, and for anyone else who survives."
"Go ahead, Dr Jones. Blow it up. I made my sense motive roll, and I beat your bluff and con rolls by 10."
"He speaks a dozen languages with 6D. He has 7D in disguise and streetwise. He has area knowledge specialization for this city of 8D and knowledge:geography for the country of 6D+2. He will disappear!"
"(will he really?)"
"(he failed a navigation check in his own library)"
"AAaaaaarrrrrr" (Intimidation roll: 14)
"AAAAARRRRRRRRRRHHHHHH" (intimidation roll 23 +4 for combined assistance)
"Yaaahahhaagh!"
"ooo Mah Tep... Oooooh Mah Tep..." (Con roll 15)
<pause>"ooo Mah Tep... Oooooh Mah Tep..." (sense motive/per roll: 5)
Hmmm... These aren't looking all that good. Maybe I should quit while I'm ahead.
-----signature-----
Create happy mediums: Free prozac to all psychics & Jedi
I'm met 6yo adults and 36yo children
Still working toward Ni-Kyu Go Ju Ryu
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Neo-Paladin
Registered:
Dec '04
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Date Posted:
8/1/06 11:59pm
Subject:
RE: **HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms
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Hello. What have we here? Welcome. I'm Lando Calrissian. I'm the administrator of this facility. and who might you be?
Someone who beat your bluff check.
-----signature-----
Just because your voice reaches halfway around the world doesn't mean you are wiser than when it reached only to the end of the bar.
Edward R. Murrow
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Jedi Merkurian
Title: Games: RPG d20 GM
Registered:
May '00
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Date Posted:
8/2/06 8:53am
Subject:
RE: **HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms
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All to easy. Perhaps you do not have as many levels as the Emperor thought!
You can destroy the Emperor, he has forseen it. Luke, you've barely begun to discover how potentially high you can roll when you spend a Force Point. Join me, and with our combined Force dice, we can end this destructive conflict and bring order to the galaxy!
Obi-Wan never told you what happened to your father...
-He told me enough! He told me you killed him!
No, I also have the Skywalker SQ.
-No, that's not true! That's impossible!
Make a Farseeing check, no know it to be true!
-NOOOOOOOO!!!! Nooooooo!!!
-----signature-----
Striking down can result in common side effects including fear, anger, aggresion, nausea, dry mouth, hatred, suffering, headaches, IBS, & in some extreme cases has been linked to lava burns
Please consult your doctor before striking anyone down
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Koohii
Title: Games: RPG d6 GM
Registered:
May '03
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Date Posted:
8/7/06 12:37am
Subject:
RE: **HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms
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"I need your help. She needs your help. My age penalty modifiers have gotten to high for this kind of thing."
"Looks like you've made a friend."
"Eh, a +2 modifier is better than no modifier."
"I must be allowed to speak."
"He must be allowed to speak."
"Low Willpower FOOL. Next time, spend skill points."
"How you doing, Dak?"
"Thanks to that speach, I have a +3 morale bonus, and can take on the whole empire by myself."
-----signature-----
Create happy mediums: Free prozac to all psychics & Jedi
I'm met 6yo adults and 36yo children
Still working toward Ni-Kyu Go Ju Ryu
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Rogue_Thunder
Registered:
Jan '03
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Date Posted:
8/7/06 1:30am
Subject:
RE: **HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms
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"You were banished because you have a low Dex score?"
"Why do I have the feeling we've picked up another professional-class character?"
"You're trusting our fates to a level 1 Fringer!"
-----signature-----
I'll fly a starship across the universe divide
And when I reach the other side
I'll find a place to rest my spirit if I can
Perhaps I may become a highwayman again
Or I may simply be a single drop of rain, but I will remain, and I'll be back again...
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Jedi Merkurian
Title: Games: RPG d20 GM
Registered:
May '00
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Date Posted:
8/7/06 11:41am
Subject:
RE: **HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms
|
"I need your help. She needs your help. My age penalty modifiers have gotten to high for this kind of thing."
 
-----signature-----
Striking down can result in common side effects including fear, anger, aggresion, nausea, dry mouth, hatred, suffering, headaches, IBS, & in some extreme cases has been linked to lava burns
Please consult your doctor before striking anyone down
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dizfactor
Registered:
Aug '02
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Date Posted:
8/9/06 9:18pm
Subject:
RE: **HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms
- Date Edited:
8/9/06 9:30pm (5 edits total)
Edited By:
dizfactor
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KENJI: I wish Hayden was here. Have you seen the stats on his character recently? He's like a Cuisinart with feet.
SAM: Don't worry about it. He wasn't here that night we raided that space station full of bounty hunters, either. We did fine.
BEN: I don't know, man. Let's just wait. He says he'll be over a little later. Hey, pass me a slice of that pizza.
SAM: Look, we'll just say that my character Mace tells him to stay put, and then later when he shows up, we'll say he got restless and came over to help. I don't even think it will be that bad.
TUX: I don't know. Didn't we just find out last session that Palpatine was a Sith Lord? Mmm, this is good pizza.
KENJI: Maybe we should try to get more help, or come up with a plan, or something.
SAM: Oh, come on. I just made 19th level, and all of you are in the teens. It's one old man. It's not going to be that hard. We don't need Hayden's character and we don't need a plan.
GEORGE: Are you guys ready?
EVERYONE: Yeah.
GEORGE: OK, your transport drops you off at the Senate building. The door opens and Chancellor Palpatine, apparently the Sith Lord Darth Sidious, turns around in his chair to face you.
SAM: "Chancellor Palpatine, you are under arrest!"
GEORGE: Roll your Intimidate.
SAM: Ummm, I rolled a 1.
GEORGE: Palpatine just looks at you and asks "Are you threatening me, Master Jedi?" and you see a lightsaber drop into his hand from the sleeve of his robe. Roll Initiative.
KENJI: Crap. 9.
SAM: 15.
TUX: Ummm, 4.
BEN: 18.
GEORGE: Let's see, I rolled a 19, +5 for Dex bonus, +4 for Improved Initiative, that makes it... 28. Pass me two slices of that pizza, will you? One pepperoni, one...is that mushroom?
BEN: No, that's actually sausage.
GEORGE: Oh, actually, just give me to sausage then.
TUX: Will you just roll already?
GEORGE: Sorry, sorry. OK, so he attacks Eeth...
TUX: No, no, Eeth Koth is dead. This is my new character, Agen Kolar, remember?
BEN: Did you just take the same stats from your dead character and change the name? You did, didn't you?
TUX: Shut up.
KENJI: It's even the same character sheet! I can see the eraser marks!
GEORGE: So, I rolled a 15, +22, so that's a 37. Plus, with Improved Crit and Devastating Strike, that threatens a crit.
TUX: *turns pale* He crits on a 15?!?!?
GEORGE: *rolls to confirm* That's a crit, so I'll just roll 5d8 for lightsaber damage... that's 27 points of wound damage for Ee...I mean, Agen.
TUX: Holy ****! Guys, I'm dead!
KENJI: Oh, noes, you're going to have to change his name again.
TUX: SHUT UP!
KENJI: *laughs and stuffs his mouth with pizza*
GEORGE: OK, since he killed Agen, and he has Great Cleave, he's got another attack on Saesee.
TUX: HA!
KENJI: Shut up!
GEORGE: Natural 20, roll to confirm...
KENJI: *chokes on pizza*
GEORGE: Yep, and damage....
SAM: Wow, look at all those 7s and 8s!
KENJI: You're kidding me! You've got to be ******* kidding me!
GEORGE: Sorry.
KENJI: Holy ****! I've been playing this character for six years!
BEN: Hey, if you killed Saesee, don't you have another Great Cleave attack now?
SAM: Dude, why did you mention that?
GEORGE: I wasn't going to forget, but just because you're so helpful, he'll attack Kit Fisto this time...
BEN: Dammit.
GEORGE: He rolled an 8, which is a 30 with all his bonuses.
BEN: That hits, but it's only vitality! YES! YES! YES! I LIVED THROUGH THE FIRST ROUND!
GEORGE: Well, not yet. Now he gets the rest of his attacks...
SAM and BEN: *groan*
*A flurry of dice are thrown. Kit Fisto loses all the rest of his vitality and his wound points on Sidious' final attack of the first round. Mace battles Sidious alone as Ben, Kenji, and Tux commisserate and eat the pizza, handing the last slice to Sam*
HAYDEN (steps into the room): Sorry I'm late, guys, traffic at the mall was insane. What did I miss?
BEN, KENJI, AND TUX: WE'RE ALL DEAD!
HAYDEN: What? Really?
SAM: Yeah, they all died the first round.
HAYDEN: Holy ****!
TUX AND KENJI: That's what I said.
HAYDEN: Why did you start without me?
BEN: Sam said we didn't need you.
HAYDEN: We've been building up to this session for the entire campaign, and you started without me? Where's Anakin, anyway?
KENJI: Sam said we should just say Mace told him to stay home.
HAYDEN: Oh, come on. You're heading into battle with a Sith Lord, and my character is a combat machine! How much sense does that make that Mace would tell him to stay home?
EVERYONE: *shrugs*
GEORGE: OK, well, we'll say you disobeyed orders and came along anyway, and you've just arrived to see Mace and Chancellor Palpatine fighting.
HAYDEN: Can I at least get a slice of pizza?
SAM: Umm... this is the last piece. You can have my crust. I think we still have that garlic dipping sauce we had for the breadsticks. You could dip it in that.
BEN: Man, those breadsticks were good.
TUX: Totally.
SAM: *offers half-eaten piece of pizza crust to Hayden*
HAYDEN: *staring at the crust* You know what? Screw you guys! George, Anakin attacks Mace.
EVERYONE: WHAT?!?
HAYDEN: **** all y'all. *rolls a die* That's a 16, with my Improved Crit and Devestating Strike, that's a crit... *rolling to confirm, then rolling again on the crit table* Make a Reflex save or you lose your weapon hand.
TUX: Man, I need to take those abilities when I create my next character.
BEN: Lemme guess, a Zabrak Jedi Guardian *hands Tux an eraser*
KENJI: Man, when Ewan gets back from vacation, he is going to be pissed...
-----signature-----
"Play is going to be for the 21st century what steam was to the 19th century."
Julian Dibbell
"You gotta love an elite killing force that you can fool by putting on a hat."
Gryph
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Jedi Merkurian
Title: Games: RPG d20 GM
Registered:
May '00
|
Date Posted:
8/10/06 8:44am
Subject:
RE: **HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms
|
 
-----signature-----
Striking down can result in common side effects including fear, anger, aggresion, nausea, dry mouth, hatred, suffering, headaches, IBS, & in some extreme cases has been linked to lava burns
Please consult your doctor before striking anyone down
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Koohii
Title: Games: RPG d6 GM
Registered:
May '03
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Date Posted:
8/10/06 9:19am
Subject:
RE: **HUMOR** Star Wars Quotes in Game Terms
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"You'll Laugh. You'll Cry. You'll kiss three buck goodbye!"
-----signature-----
Create happy mediums: Free prozac to all psychics & Jedi
I'm met 6yo adults and 36yo children
Still working toward Ni-Kyu Go Ju Ryu
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