| Author |
Topic:
Remember, It's Not "Zombie Tentacle-RAPE," It's "Surprise Zombie Tentacle-SEX": Resident Evil 5
|
Leto II
Registered:
Jan '00
|
Date Posted:
6/10 10:34am
Subject:
Remember, It's Not "Zombie Tentacle-RAPE," It's "Surprise Zombie Tentacle-SEX": Resident Evil 5
- Date Edited:
6/10 7:34pm (11 edits total)
Edited By:
Aragorn327
|
My God, this new trailer just owned my soul.
The truly awesome part? All of those combat-scenes are IN-GAME, not pre-rendered cutscenes. I seriously doubt the Nintendo Wii could even handle this game without some serious dumbing-down of the architecture. It would cough up blood and die just trying to run it. Regardless, G4 reported yesterday that there won't be a Wii-port of RE5, due to RE4's low sales on the console.
Cant wait to see this one running at full 1080p.
Chris Redfield returneth -- here's hoping he gets to close the deal with that new Jill-lookin' Sheva chick from the trailers; Leon could've totally scored with Ashley at the end of Resident Evil 4, but shot her down, the stupid bastard.
Though, it's from Capcom, so it'll be released after your parents die, and your children are born, and fetching silver flecks your hair. The only thing that surprises me about this...that it's called "Resident Evil 5," and not "Street Fighter vs. S.T.A.R.S."
God, I can't believe how hard this game looks already. I'm having nightmares about somehow having to kill my way through those enormous crowds of creepy ****s, let alone when those tentacle-sprouting freaks start showing up. I was hoping I was done with those after RE4.
I can't imagine how this game is gonna go over -- white guy versus the negro hordes. But what's the problem with killing nothing but Spanish zombies in RE4, anyway? There are Spanish people in Spain, after all. As well as black people in Africa. And how is this different from the thousands of white people we've killed without remorse in these games?
Racism issues aside, I think we can all agree that RE5 is gonna rock...it'll have the most realistic hair-rendering of the whole series. Look at the luscious locks on that dude. All I ask for is being able to switch weapons on the fly, and I'm sold. Who am I kidding, I'm sold anyway.
No Sixaxis controls for the PS3 build, either. Because, apparently, they suck.
Kotaku has an early hand-on impressions article, and they do mention that the shantytown is just one of the places we visit. The newest trailer also has that creepy mine-looking level, and I can only hope we go somewhere awesome, maybe ride some cheetahs.
-----signature-----
Tighter Than a 10-Year-Old.
|
|
|
Quote Reply |
Active Topic Notification |
Private Message |
Post History
|
Darth-Lando
Registered:
Aug '02
|
Date Posted:
6/10 10:59am
Subject:
RE: Remember, It's Not "Zombie Tentacle-Rape," It's "Unexpected Zombie Tentacle-Sex": RESIDENT EVIL
|
Leto II posted:
Regardless, G4 just reported yesterday that there won't be a Wii-port of RE5, due to RE4's low sales on the console.
That's a stupid excuse. It was the third system the game was released on and like 3 years after the fact. Why would they expect high sales? Anyone but die hard RE fans who wanted to play it had already played it on GCN or PS2. That said, I played the Wii version of RE4 and it blew both other versions out of the water. Nevertheless I am excited for RE5 and can't wait for it to come out.
-----signature-----
"A delayed game is eventually good, a rushed game is bad forever." - Shigeru Miyamoto
San Jose Sharks: 4-0-0
|
|
|
Quote Reply |
Active Topic Notification |
Private Message |
Post History
|
Leto II
Registered:
Jan '00
|
Date Posted:
6/10 11:05am
Subject:
RE: Remember, It's Not "Zombie Tentacle-Rape," It's "Unexpected Zombie Tentacle-Sex": RESIDENT EVIL
|
I definitely agree -- the Wii controls were heavenly, and the diminishing-sales point is a valid one. Still, I would throw down in a hot second for the rumored Xbox 360 port of Resident Evil 4, despite the fact that I've already bought it twice now.
What can I say? I'm a shameless RE4 whore.
-----signature-----
Tighter Than a 10-Year-Old.
|
|
|
Quote Reply |
Active Topic Notification |
Private Message |
Post History
|
_Sublime_Skywalker_
Registered:
May '04
|
Date Posted:
6/10 5:43pm
Subject:
RE: Remember, It's Not "Zombie Tentacle-Rape," It's "Unexpected Zombie Tentacle-Sex": RESIDENT EVIL
|
Holy ****.
and I thought RE2 for N64 was the scariest. This looks INTENSE.
and tentacle rape monster- sure winner.
-----signature-----
'You don't know the Power of the Darkside!'-Darth Vader
|
|
|
Quote Reply |
Active Topic Notification |
Private Message |
Post History
|
Vengance1003
Registered:
Mar '06
|
Date Posted:
6/10 9:42pm
Subject:
RE: Remember, It's Not "Zombie Tentacle-RAPE," It's "Surprise Zombie Tentacle-SEX": Resident Evil 5
|
|
I need to get this now.
-----signature-----
Is no the answer to this question?
Companda
|
|
|
Quote Reply |
Active Topic Notification |
Private Message |
Post History
|
nancyallen
Registered:
Nov '07
|
Date Posted:
6/11 4:19am
Subject:
RE: Remember, It's Not "Zombie Tentacle-RAPE," It's "Surprise Zombie Tentacle-SEX": Resident Evil 5
|
|
Chris is back, but that can't be his sister with him can it? If so what's going to happen when they find Sherry?
-----signature-----
Even as I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I will fear no evil, for God is with me.
|
|
|
Quote Reply |
Active Topic Notification |
Private Message |
Post History
|
Leto II
Registered:
Jan '00
|
Date Posted:
6/11 9:54am
Subject:
RE: Remember, It's Not "Zombie Tentacle-RAPE," It's "Surprise Zombie Tentacle-SEX": Resident Evil 5
- Date Edited:
6/11 10:48am (1 edits total)
Edited By:
Leto II
|
The woman with the gun in the two trailers is a new character named "Sheva," who's from Africa (she speaks with an accent during the footage), but beyond that, we don't know much else about her at the moment, whether she'll eventually betray Chris, or not.
I have a weird feeling that she'll be both playable in co-op, and have her own scenario, similar to Jill and Ada. That is, if they don't feel like killing her halfway through the game.
Also, Resident Evil 5 spoilers for Sherry:
It's been confirmed that the girl seen floating in that liquid-filled chamber at the end of the first trailer is indeed Sherry, around age 22 -- something to do with testing the G-Virus, apparently.
-----signature-----
Tighter Than a 10-Year-Old.
|
|
|
Quote Reply |
Active Topic Notification |
Private Message |
Post History
|
Jedi knight Pozzi
Registered:
Apr '00
|
Date Posted:
6/11 1:08pm
Subject:
RE: Remember, It's Not "Zombie Tentacle-RAPE," It's "Surprise Zombie Tentacle-SEX": Resident Evil 5
|
Darth-Lando posted:
[quote=Leto II]Regardless, G4 just reported yesterday that there won't be a Wii-port of RE5, due to RE4's low sales on the console.
I'm surprised, I thought it was one of the million sellers on the Wii.
-----signature-----
Nothing lasts forever. But somethings last for long enough. Life goes on. 
|
|
|
Quote Reply |
Active Topic Notification |
Private Message |
Post History
|
timmoishere
Registered:
Jun '07
|
Date Posted:
6/11 1:23pm
Subject:
RE: Remember, It's Not "Zombie Tentacle-RAPE," It's "Surprise Zombie Tentacle-SEX": Resident Evil 5
|
|
I need this game nao!
-----signature-----
What ain't no country I ever heard of. They speak English in What?
Vikings > Pirates > Ninjas
Everything tastes better wrapped in bacon, especially bacon
|
|
|
Quote Reply |
Active Topic Notification |
Private Message |
Post History
|
Leto II
Registered:
Jan '00
|
Date Posted:
7/15 1:49pm
Subject:
RE: Remember, It's Not "Zombie Tentacle-RAPE," It's "Surprise Zombie Tentacle-SEX": Resident Evil 5
- Date Edited:
7/15 2:00pm (2 edits total)
Edited By:
Leto II
|
Confirmed release-dates from E3:
Japan - March 12, 2009
North America/Europe - March 13, 2009
Looks like this is gonna be this coming spring's GTA IV. Damage Control 5: Chris Redfield and the Albino Africans is looking positively STUNNING.
New IGN videos demonstrating co-op involving the new "Sheva" character, which was first confirmed yesterday in that first hands-on E3 demo that premiered there.
-----signature-----
Tighter Than a 10-Year-Old.
|
|
|
Quote Reply |
Active Topic Notification |
Private Message |
Post History
|
Ogmios22188
Registered:
Oct '04
|
Date Posted:
7/15 6:52pm
Subject:
RE: Remember, It's Not "Zombie Tentacle-RAPE," It's "Surprise Zombie Tentacle-SEX": Resident Evil 5
|
|
Doesn't this game actually take place in Haiti, not Africa? If so, depending on the African country, it makes even less sense for them to add white zombies, seeing as how Haiti is 95% black according to the CIA World Factbook.
|
|
|
Quote Reply |
Active Topic Notification |
Private Message |
Post History
|
Leto II
Registered:
Jan '00
|
Date Posted:
7/15 7:01pm
Subject:
RE: Remember, It's Not "Zombie Tentacle-RAPE," It's "Surprise Zombie Tentacle-SEX": Resident Evil 5
- Date Edited:
7/15 7:02pm (1 edits total)
Edited By:
Leto II
|
|
It's been confirmed as Africa by Capcom...also, in the trailer linked above, Sheva tells Chris, "Welcome to Africa."
-----signature-----
Tighter Than a 10-Year-Old.
|
|
|
Quote Reply |
Active Topic Notification |
Private Message |
Post History
|
_Sublime_Skywalker_
Registered:
May '04
|
Date Posted:
7/15 7:16pm
Subject:
RE: Remember, It's Not "Zombie Tentacle-RAPE," It's "Surprise Zombie Tentacle-SEX": Resident Evil 5
|
|
The co-op gameplay looks off the hook. I have no doubt this game is going to own Resident Evil 4.
-----signature-----
'You don't know the Power of the Darkside!'-Darth Vader
|
|
|
Quote Reply |
Active Topic Notification |
Private Message |
Post History
|
darth_grievous1
Registered:
Apr '04
|
Date Posted:
7/15 7:59pm
Subject:
RE: Remember, It's Not "Zombie Tentacle-RAPE," It's "Surprise Zombie Tentacle-SEX": Resident Evil 5
|
Leto II posted:
Confirmed release-dates from E3:
Japan - March 12, 2009
North America/Europe - March 13, 2009
Looks like this is gonna be this coming spring's GTA IV. Damage Control 5: Chris Redfield and the Albino Africans is looking positively STUNNING.
New IGN videos demonstrating co-op involving the new "Sheva" character, which was first confirmed yesterday in that first hands-on E3 demo that premiered there.
Hells yeah. I'll be sure to be on this, seeing as it's coming out on my birthday 
-----signature-----
Life is meant to lived, not graded. ~ lexu
I AM AN ASSASSIN (shh)
|
|
|
Quote Reply |
Active Topic Notification |
Private Message |
Post History
|
Ogmios22188
Registered:
Oct '04
|
Date Posted:
7/15 9:45pm
Subject:
RE: Remember, It's Not "Zombie Tentacle-RAPE," It's "Surprise Zombie Tentacle-SEX": Resident Evil 5
|
Leto II posted:
It's been confirmed as Africa by Capcom...also, in the trailer linked above, Sheva tells Chris, "Welcome to Africa."
Ah, then that makes a little more sense, at least in (from doing research as to where to game takes place) Eritrea and Ethiopia, where the people are historically descended from both Semites and East Africans, so not everyone is going to be "black" per se.
|
|
|
Quote Reply |
Active Topic Notification |
Private Message |
Post History
|
Psycho_Sith
Registered:
Aug '03
|
Date Posted:
7/19 12:05pm
Subject:
RE: Remember, It's Not "Zombie Tentacle-RAPE," It's "Surprise Zombie Tentacle-SEX": Resident Evil 5
|
|
The online co-op is gonna be awesome!
-----signature-----
Resident Rocker of the GFFA!
|
|
|
Quote Reply |
Active Topic Notification |
Private Message |
Post History
|
