JCC Who has had their home broken into? Advice?

Turn to Jeezus. Pray the burgalization away.

 

Carry insurance with a low deductible. Seriously, there's not a whole lot you can really do if someone wants to steal your stuff that badly. And it's just stuff. The only thing that truly sucks is if they steal something with sentimental value. For instance, my Aunt had her mother's engagement ring stolen from her jewelry box by the people who used to clean her house.

But electronics or money... sure, it sucks, but an alarm that calls the police is about the best you can do. And then you have the problem we used to where if it goes off accidentally the police show up and it's super awkward.

At least be grateful you're not my cousin, who twice had someone break into her apartment, once while she was there and got robbed at gunpoint on her birthday. My advice to her was... why the hell haven't you moved? But she was in kind of a crappy part of town. In a nice neighborhood like your dad's, it's way less expected but no less plausible.

Well, of course you'd think of Ronald McDonald, what with all this hamburger talk.

 

I haven't read through all of this thread so apologies if this has been suggested. In my area, the local police will send someone out to inspect your home and suggest things to make it more burglar-proof if anything is needed (better locks, etc). You might contact your local station and see if they offer that kind of service.

 

Sorry Mom.

 

Yay!

 

I can't believe no one has mentioned the UA 571-c remote sentry weapon

 

You should just build an army of T-1000's to protect your home.

 

Ooo yeah! You could get Scarecrow from Batman Begins, and he would spray his hallucinogens on the burglars and they would go insane and tear each other apart.

 

jack's beard is more tragic than mac's. but i like mac, he seems like a fine fellow.

 

Has anyone heard from Coruscant? I'm beginning to fear the worst...

 

Someone stole Coruscant!

. . . was he insured?

 

Now we'll never have anyone to not finish the PEOPLE interviews.

 

it's ok, i'll not do it.

 

good! now we can start the POOPLE interviews. i will be a frequent interviewee.

interviewheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

 

Finally, we can start that new round of the Sleepy House game.

 

Awww, you guys!!! I think it's so heartwarming that you were so, so concerned for my well-being!

But alas I am still living on Yo Burgle Burgle Street.

 

It was invented by a robber who also said that he had been electrocuted 10 times while attempting to gain access to various properties that were protected by electric fences.

 

Sure you can. You could shoot them, but so they die slowly. Then you could pour salt into the wound. Then torture them for justice.

But you should certainly shoot them. Always.

(Seriously, how do you sustain this kind of revenge fantasy thinking, GenAntilles?)

 

Study the film Home Alone

 

This is why you are one of my favorites.

 

I would love to interview you for a POOPLE segment. The people need to hear about Burzums, Robocops, and your plans to make a Superman film starring Nic Cage.

 

Inadvisable. If you have a burglar the aim is to neutralize the threat. Letting the burglar die slowly or torturing them leaves them open to launch a counterattack. Preventing that is key, eliminate his ability to be a threat to you if you must.

Though that is only if the burglar breaches your inner defenses and leaves that force the only option available. Otherwise hold up in your safest place and await the police to arrive and make a report.