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Author	Topic: Warming Up (L/M vignette; also one of the Temperature series)
obaona Registered: Jun '02	Date Posted: 10/1/03 6:00pm Subject: Warming Up (L/M vignette; also one of the Temperature series) - Date Edited: 1/6/04 6:46pm (10 edits total) Edited By: obaona
	Thanks for clicking! Title: Warming Up. Summary: A moment of realization for Mara. A/N: I love feedback! ahem This is the sequel to The Blanket Incident, It Was Cold, and It Got Too Hot. The Blanket Incident came first, and It Was Cold is the sequel to that, and It Got Too Hot the sequel to that. This takes place between It Was Cold and It Got Too Hot, though I suppose technically it's the fourth in the Temperature series (as I have dubbed it ). Got all that? Anyway, it should stand alone easily enough, as I don't really borrow from the otehr stories in this one. A/N2: The title of this is close, but not quite, the one that LadyPadme gave me. I felt this title suited the story more, as this one is the most serious of the series and it works better with the concept of this lil' fic. Heat and cold are more metaphorical here. A/N3 (savin' the best for last!): Many thanks to Jedi-2B for beta'ing! And so quickly, too! Chronological Listing and Links of the Series: I am putting this here due to the fact that readers have posted on different stories with ‘what’s this about a sequel?’. Here are all the stories (including this one) in chronological order (not the order they were written): Cold Front, Breaking the Ice, The Blanket Incident, It Was Cold, If You Can’t Stand the Heat, Warming Up, It Got Too Hot, Kindling the Flame, Mara the Burninator, It’s Not the Heat, It’s the Humidity, and Heat Wave. Cover Art ~~~~* Luke slept, Mara thought, with the deep sleep of the good and innocent. Of course, looking at things realistically, Luke didn’t always sleep well, and he was certainly not innocent. Naïve, optimistic to an amazing degree, and good-hearted? Yes, no question. But he had seen terrors that she had glimpsed only in passing, and had never truly seen, with the eyes of a conscience. And he wasn’t a perfect man, by a long shot – she knew that well, and was well-acquainted with his faults. But they seemed so different from hers, like he didn’t have faults in the things that really mattered, according to the common wisdom of the universe – surviving, knowing when not to trust someone . . . And he had done things that weren’t good, that could not be the cause of listening to his conscience. Yet, he often slept deeply. Mara looked at him, from her vantage point sitting beside him in bed. He was asleep, of course, the dark blue shadows of night highlighting portions of his face, the faint light caressing his brow, his lips, his jaw. He breathed in slow, even breaths. She sat beside him, in her nightgown, thinking. Shivers sped through her body, largely unnoticed in the thrall of her musings. Deep thought concerning herself wasn’t something Mara engaged in very often. It wasn’t smart to think too much about yourself – doubt and fears would often creep in. Mara had always found it easiest not to think ‘deep’ thoughts. Don’t think about who your target is. Don’t think about his family. Just think about how his brand new security system could be circumvented. It was the way she was trained, and the way she patterned her behavior most of her life. Luke didn’t think of things in such a way. She was sure it would be completely unnatural of him to do so, and she sometimes wondered, briefly, if that was a fault of hers that she did think of things in such a way. It wasn’t something she dwelled on, though Luke could always tell if she thought of her past, and could usually guess what she was thinking – or pull it out of the Force like a magician, waving his magic wand like she had so often accused him. He would look at her intently, earnestly, and tell her . . . things. How she amazed him because of her ability to look beyond her past, the way she had been trained to think. How she had submerged those parts of herself to survive. How much he loved her. And always, lost in those blue eyes that seemed as depthless as a sea, she would find herself believing it. Luke gave her faith so easily, the endless hope he seemed to have in life filling him and overflowing into her. Still, she sometimes doubted. Even in this – this beautiful thing, their marriage. He would be away, doing something else, it didn’t matter. There would be distance, for a brief time, and her faith, so weak on its own, would fail her. She didn’t admit to him how she feared one day she would be cut off from his warmth, that one day she would go back to the cold life she had been living, and now that she knew what warmth really was, it would be just endless suffering for her. She feared, privately and only at times she had to herself, that she would mess this up. Luke had seemed to fall in love with her so easily. She had mused, a few times, that love, if that was what this was, meant surrender. In loving Luke, if that was truly what she was doing, she surrendered; to the feeling, to the emotion, to the force of it. It was a struggle to let go every time, even though it was becoming easier and easer, as if love could be practiced. But she still feared the cold. She feared, even, that if she experienced too much of this wonderful warmth, that if this miracle of love passed, she wouldn’t be able to survive anymore. Survival had been a trait of Mara Jade’s from the beginning, and to lose that ability was . . . incomprehensible. Mara’s life had always been a set of distances. All that varied was how far the distances were; they were always there. There were no distances from Luke . . . oh, short ones, yes, separations borne from work or other matters, but he remained in her mind. Not that he was a constant telepathic or empathic presence, but that he had left a mark on her life, her mind, so much that all those things that made up Luke were intertwined with her, with the way she thought and what she believed. Palpatine had never much cared about Mara’s entanglements, as long as she did her duty and wasn’t compromised. He never even demanded she sleep with targets – whether they were for assassination or spying – nor did he demand any kind of emotion from her. He wanted her loyalty, and he got it through his various ways, but devotion was unimportant to him beyond how it could be used; that she had been devoted in some ways had mattered to him little, whatever she thought at the time. As a result, Mara had often tried to discard emotion entirely, except when it suited specific purposes. The idea of enjoying an emotion was alien to her. There was always some degree of satisfaction with a job well done, but little else. Her brief flings had more to do with curiosity or using than any desire to become close to someone else. And it had seemed that with each touch that others claimed to be of such importance, and that she considered to be so little, she grew all the more cynical and unaffected . Is it any wonder, Mara thought, that I fear I can love? She feared that she did not love Luke. Not truly. Not in the fashion of old tales or long-married couples. This marriage was new . . . weeks old, a newborn, and she feared it would not turn out well. “Mara,” a soft voice murmured. Luke shifted and stretched, light playing across his features as he turned in bed and changed from sleep to wakefulness. Mara started slightly, looking down at him, her hair sliding across her bare shoulders and her muscles giving a twinge as they moved after such a long period of stillness. She realized her face wasn’t visible in the darkness, the faint light coming from behind her and coming over her shoulders, so he couldn’t see the expression on her face. His hand reached out and stroked her arm. “You’re cold,” he said. “What’s wrong?” “Nothing,” she said quickly. “You know,” Luke said dryly, “your saying that is kind of like you expecting me not to answer a rhetorical question.” Mara gave a thin, dry laugh. Luke often had that problem, and she had teased him mercilessly about it. “It’s all right.” “No, it’s not,” Luke quickly returned. He raised himself with his elbow, and took the blanket to pull it more securely around Mara. “Come on, get under the covers. Your skin is freezing, even if you aren’t feeling it now.” Moving stiffly, Mara did something she rarely did – she obeyed, and lay awkwardly, letting Luke pull the blanket up. He was right; as soon as the blanket covered her, she felt the warmth, and it felt good. She had been cold. Luke shifted so he was closer to her, and put his arms around her. “Now, what’s wrong?” he said softly, almost a whisper. Mara sighed. “I was just thinking. Bad habit of mine,” she whispered back. “Thinking isn’t a bad habit,” Luke replied, sounding almost amused. “I was just . . . doubting, I guess,” Mara said quietly, the words coming out of her naturally, it somehow being the right thing to tell Luke everything, even when . . . it was this, and it might hurt him. “Doubting what?” Mara hesitated, then decided for a spurt of blunt honesty. Luke, despite her teasing, took her bluntness and lack of tact better than most anyone she had ever met, carefully considering her words despite the way she said it. She turned to her side, so she was facing him instead of lying on her back. “That I love you. That I can love.” Luke became very quiet. Not that the absence of his speaking was quiet – but he grew still, and his breathing faint. His expression never changed, that calm, thoughtful look remaining. Mara’s heart, conversely, sped up. “How do you feel about me, Mara?” he finally asked, softly. “I –“ Mara began, confused, then hesitated and stopped. Was he expecting her to say she loved him? What meaning would that have? Luke silently stroked her arm, encouraging her to go on. “I don’t know,” she said at last. The words felt pulled from her by Luke’s request, nearly impossible for her to resist. In another way, she felt as if she had to speak the words, to really understand them herself. “You’re . . . important. You’re important because . . . you’re you, not because of what you are to me. It doesn’t have to do with me at all, but I want you to be safe, and happy, I guess. And that you want me to be happy, that you . . . love me, just makes it all the more real.” Luke smiled. “What do you think you just described?” He kept stroking her arm. “Love?” she said hesitantly, feeling absurdly vulnerable in saying the word. “I love you, Mara,” he said, giving her that intent look she knew so well. “Faults and good parts and all of it.” He seemed so confident . . . and wouldn’t he know this? And she trusted him with so many things, she could not help but trust him with this. Mara smiled, somewhat tearfully, her eyes shining and her throat tight with the force and importance of her own words, and Luke’s simple affirmation. Faith of her own, in Luke’s love, seemed to grow. She did love him. And he loved her. “Don’t doubt you can love,” he continued softly. “I think it’s our gift, that we are given the ability to love. It’s up to us what to do with it, of course. Love, I think, even as you define it, can change ourselves, even as it can change the person we love. I’m so much happier, Mara. And I love you. I love you, and I’m glad I love you,” he whispered, almost fiercely. “I love you, too,” Mara whispered. She narrowed the space between them, and rested her head against his chest. He caressed her arm and her hair, then her neck, just touching every part of her in slow, gentle movements. He seemed to transmit his caring for her with each touch. And as their mutual touches grew more urgent, and the night passed on, Mara felt the fears melt away. He loved to feel her skin, just as she loved his touch upon her skin. Every moment of contact was important, given, truly experienced, and for the first time she understood consciously – as she had understood subconsciously, in the little ways Luke would massage her neck after a long day – why people gave this such weight. Because she could do this, she could love, and she was loving Luke. The cold of the past was fading and gone – it was only getting warmer. fin -----signature----- MS Word is designed by sadists with masochists in mind. - teh atty my recent Atton (KOTOR2) fic: http://boards.theforce.net/before_the_saga/b10475/30335989
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Jaina_and_Jag Registered: Apr '03	Date Posted: 10/1/03 6:19pm Subject: RE: Warming Up (L/M vignette; also one of the Temperature series) - Date Edited: 10/1/03 6:23pm (1 edits total) Edited By: Jaina_and_Jag
	That was awesome!!!! I totally loved it! sighs I'm glad that you showed how Mara was doubting her relationship with Luke because in the books they never show anything but them just jumping into it and then years later. That was a lovely!!!! EDIT: Yeay!!!! First reply! J&J
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EmilieDarklighter Registered: Jan '02	Date Posted: 10/1/03 6:43pm Subject: RE: Warming Up (L/M vignette; also one of the Temperature series)
	What words have I for such beauty? Oba, darling, this is so wonderful, so very Mara. I love this story, and I'm sure I'll read it over and over again many more times. This is the best of the four, I believe. You just keep getting better! -----signature----- Master of Jedi_Emeritus Former Padawan of Gabri_Jade Little sister to Gabri_Jade and LadyPadme 25 Rules for Successful Writing http://boards.theforce.net/fan_fiction_resource/b10304/28400222/p1/?2
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Benjor45 Registered: Aug '03	Date Posted: 10/1/03 7:11pm Subject: RE: Warming Up (L/M vignette; also one of the Temperature series) - Date Edited: 10/1/03 9:25pm (3 edits total) Edited By: Benjor45
	Oba! Wow! Wow! WoW! This is a classic. Beautifull. Beautifull. Edit: This fic and others show that I still have much to learn. It's fics like yours that make me see that Mara is more an emotional creation of her fans than a LFL property. Only her fans have given her the emotional growt that she deserved since the end of TLC. Beautifull, Oba, beautifull.
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LadyPadme Title: Manager Emeritus Registered: Sep '02	Date Posted: 10/1/03 7:24pm Subject: RE: Warming Up (L/M vignette; also one of the Temperature series)
	What a lovely viggie! And so like Mara to doubt herself in this fashion!! Beautiful and lyrical, a fitting end to the quartet...unless...dare I say it that there might be more? Great job, oba! -----signature----- Evil Twin of Gabri_Jade When a baby smiles the world is happy
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Benjor45 Registered: Aug '03	Date Posted: 10/1/03 7:44pm Subject: RE: Warming Up (L/M vignette; also one of the Temperature series)
	But she still feared the cold. She feared, even, that if she experienced too much of this wonderful warmth, that if this miracle of love passed, she wouldn’t be able to survive anymore. Survival had been a trait of Mara Jade’s from the beginning, and to lose that ability was . . . incomprehensible. And it had seemed that with each touch that others claimed to be of such importance, and that she considered to be so little, she grew all the more cynical and unaffected . Is it any wonder, Mara thought, that I fear I can love? “Don’t doubt you can love,” he continued softly. “I think it’s our gift, that we are given the ability to love. It’s up to us what to do with it, of course. Love, I think, even as you define it, can change ourselves, even as it can change the person we love. I’m so much happier, Mara. And I love you. I love you, and I’m glad I love you,” he whispered, almost fiercely. This is a classic. This is the first of the 'Temperature' series from Mara's POV and from a third person POV, and it seems that you went much deeper with her than in the others with Luke. She deserves every little bit of characterization from her fans, after all Luke has a much more solid characterization basis. Great job, Oba.
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NarundiJedi Title: FF Chapter Rep Albany, NY Registered: Oct '01	Date Posted: 10/1/03 8:14pm Subject: RE: Warming Up (L/M vignette; also one of the Temperature series)
	Another wonderful one, oba! I like how this one had me wondering how Luke would take it, but I can understand Mara being confused about love. When you grow up knowing the kind of things she did, it takes a while to learn or re-learn things like how to love. Now, do you know where I can find a Luke Skywalker for my mom? She's about Mara's age! Jae Angel -----signature----- Kill Brodey: Vol 1 - http://boards.theforce.net/message.asp?topic=17015774&replies=0 Helané, Handmaiden of the Crest Leli's Blonde Twin! I'm now Mrs. NJ! w00t!
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Dancing_Jansons Registered: Oct '02	Date Posted: 10/1/03 8:47pm Subject: RE: Warming Up (L/M vignette; also one of the Temperature series)
	Fantastic, Oba! Very romantic.
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Bri_Windstar Registered: May '02	Date Posted: 10/1/03 9:01pm Subject: RE: Warming Up (L/M vignette; also one of the Temperature series)
	Aww, how fun (seemed a fitting emoticon for this piece ) I can see her doubting herself when it comes to more vulnerable, more HUMAN, emotions, absolutely. Its part of what her upbringing was, as you said. For her to be a bit confused by it and new emotions that test it is very natural. Fun stuff, dear, humorous, serious, its all good ::Windstar Out:: -----signature----- Mediocrity- it takes a lot less time and most people won't notice the difference before it's too late. * OMG! SO RIDICULOUSLY AND AGGRAVATINGLY PERFECT!- Gabri * 11010110101000101011
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Dev_Binks Registered: Aug '03	Date Posted: 10/2/03 1:39am Subject: RE: Warming Up (L/M vignette; also one of the Temperature series)
	I love these too. The Temperature series is good, and a good name for 'em. -----signature----- "There will be pages. Lots and lots of pages. Most of them will have letters on them, and the vast majority of those letters will be in the roman alphabet." -Aaron Allston
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Jedi-2B Registered: Nov '00	Date Posted: 10/2/03 6:53am Subject: RE: Warming Up (L/M vignette; also one of the Temperature series)
	You posted already! You already know how beautiful I thought this was. Not only is it a great bridge between It Was Cold and It Got Too Hot, but it also does much to explain Mara's lack of actually saying "I love you" to Luke in Vision of the Future. You bring out so well Mara's doubts about knowing what love truly is, since she had never experienced love before Luke. Excellent, excellent job. -----signature----- It was on her fifteenth day in the darkness of the Nirauan cave when Mara Jade awoke to discover a rescuer had finally arrived. It was not, however, any of the potential rescuers she would have expected. It was Luke. ~~And the rest is history~~
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rogue11lovesjag Registered: Jun '02	Date Posted: 10/2/03 7:33am Subject: RE: Warming Up (L/M vignette; also one of the Temperature series)
	Lovely job, oba!!! ~Rogue -----signature----- Carrolé, Handmaiden of the Crest! Give me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change The courage to change the things I can And the wisdom to hide the bodies of everyone who ruins my ships.
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Rivad_Bacar Registered: Nov '02	Date Posted: 10/2/03 9:31am Subject: RE: Warming Up (L/M vignette; also one of the Temperature series)
	Wow! All I can say Oba is that this vignette is very poingent. My wife and I have been married just under three months now. Fortunately neither of us has had to deal with anywhere near the turmoil Mara has, and we still have so many conversations like this one with each other. It's truely a beutiful and touching piece! And since I ALWAYS like to see more Luke/Mara fics out here, I'll drop a potential plot bunny! Breaking the Ice... -----signature----- " Fear God and dread naught"- Admiral Sir Bruce Fraiser, First Sea Lord, His Majesty's Navy Circa 1912 Recently married and on cloud twentyseven! Rivad_Bacar: X-wing pilot and diehard romantic.
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EmilieDarklighter Registered: Jan '02	Date Posted: 10/2/03 11:01am Subject: RE: Warming Up (L/M vignette; also one of the Temperature series)
	laughs The neverending viggie series! -----signature----- Master of Jedi_Emeritus Former Padawan of Gabri_Jade Little sister to Gabri_Jade and LadyPadme 25 Rules for Successful Writing http://boards.theforce.net/fan_fiction_resource/b10304/28400222/p1/?2
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Bri_Windstar Registered: May '02	Date Posted: 10/2/03 5:07pm Subject: RE: Warming Up (L/M vignette; also one of the Temperature series) - Date Edited: 10/2/03 5:07pm (1 edits total) Edited By: Bri_Windstar
	OOH!! I second that motion!! BREAK THE ICE, BREAK THE ICE!!! ::Windstar Out:: -----signature----- Mediocrity- it takes a lot less time and most people won't notice the difference before it's too late. * OMG! SO RIDICULOUSLY AND AGGRAVATINGLY PERFECT!- Gabri * 11010110101000101011
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Shinar Registered: May '02	Date Posted: 10/2/03 6:19pm Subject: RE: Warming Up (L/M vignette; also one of the Temperature series)
	Okay, I will finally delurk and tell you I've adored ALL of the temperature series. And that suggested plot bunny does sound mighty interesting -----signature----- "Let's eat Grandpa!" "Let's eat, Grandpa!" Punctuation saves lives.
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