Beyond - Legends The Journal of Talon Tantiss (DDC 2013 ) Updated 22 Dec 2013--Complete.

I absolutely love seeing this from Talon's POV..it refreshing.

 

Thanks Nyota's Heart, earlybird-obi-wan, Hazel, and EmeraldJediFire for reading and taking the time to comment. Talon is still a little confused and he probably will never know the complete truth of what Jacen was up to...but he really doesn't have a need to know. I guess if any reader wants to know what exactly happened they can read the story Sacrifices that covers this time period. You can find the link in my signature.

Thanks again for reading!

~JL~
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Entry 135

After about a half hour Uncle Luke and my dad came out of the Myrkr forest with an unconscious Jacen hanging over my father’s shoulder. Jaina and Ben ran up to them as I lagged behind while helping my woozy brother along. I don’t think Jacen gave him a concussion, but Jaden isn’t very steady on his feet yet.

"Is he okay?" Jaina asked Uncle Luke anxiously as she reached her brother.

"He's just stunned," Luke reassured her.

Uncle Luke told Jaden to sedate Jacen and do what he needs to do to keep him under until the Solos get to Myrkr.

I don’t know why Jacen tried to escape. Perhaps he preferred to be eaten by wild vornskrs than facing his parents…or maybe something I said to him earlier spooked him.

I would not be surprised one bit if Lumiya is connected with the plague. For a nanosecond I considered that Jacen might be involved in the plot to kill Hapan royals, but I immediately dismissed the idea. Jacen would never put Tenel Ka in danger. I don’t care if he was a yellow-eyed, card-carrying Sith so evil that he shot Force lighting out of his ass. He would never risk Tenel Ka’s life. Never!


Entry 136

Eventually the Millennium Falcon arrived on Myrkr. As we watched its approach my dad’s face blossomed into a wide grin. My uncle asked dad why he was smiling, but he just said, "I don't want to ruin Han's surprise."

We strode over to the ship as it touched down and watched as the boarding ramp slowly lowered. The first person out was Leia, her face was a portrait of sadness and sheer apprehension. Jaina ran up to her mother and embraced her. I was watching Jaina and my Aunt Leia when I heard Ben scream out, "Mom!"

We all looked up the boarding ramp to see my Aunt Mara slowly moving down the ramp as Han hovered next to her protectively. A wide smile blossomed across my Uncle Luke's face as he raced toward Mara. Ben beat him to her and practically crushed his mother in a big hug.

"Easy Ben, your mother is not quite up to peak condition," Han pointed out. "Try not to squash her."

Neither Ben nor Mara seemed to hear the former smuggler's warning. They held each other tightly, crying on each other's shoulders. "Gods, Mom," Ben sobbed. "I was so afraid you wouldn't recover. You were dead…" Ben's voice cracked and faltered for a moment. "Dead."

Eventually Ben allowed his father time to greet his wife before they started walking toward the Myrkr base.

When my aunt saw my father as she broke away from Luke and marched over to him. She gazed into my dad’s yellow stained eyes and shuddered. "Mark," she said grimly, "You turned to the dark side to save me."

He gave her an apologetic half smile. "Yes," he admitted.

She smacked him across the chest. "You're an idiot."

I had to laugh at that...my dad did too. Aunt Mara admonished Dad for taking such a big chance but I don’t think she was really mad at him. I think she was more scared for him. Those sickly jaundice eyes doesn't help ease anybody’s apprehension.


Entry 137

The Solos and Uncle Luke tried to talk to Jacen again, but he wasn’t giving them any more answers. Jaden stayed with a shackled Jacen while the rest of us went down to the dayroom to discuss our options.

"I think most of you know the situation.” Uncle Luke said to us. “It appears Lumiya tricked Jacen into dark side training. She somehow convinced him that a great threat was coming and he would need to learn the skills of the dark side to supplement his Jedi training in order to defeat this impending danger. During the few times Jacen was awake he was either violent or insolent." Luke looked over to Leia and Han, hesitating slightly before he continued. "On top of attacking Mara on Kavan, he tried to kill Mark with a blaster and he beat and choked out Jaden during an escape attempt."

Leia sobbed as laid her head on Han's chest as they sat together on the couch.

"Last night he ran into the Myrkr forest with total disregard for his safety," Luke continued. "He was nearly eaten by vornskrs. It appears he has lost the will to live, or at least he has a total disregard for danger."

My Uncle Luke then broached the subject that was on all of our minds. What were we going to do with Jacen? If Jacen didn’t want to return to the Jedi and if we weren’t convinced that he renounced the darkside we had little options. He already proved to be very dangerous. We just couldn’t let him walk away as a free man. We could confine him to the Temple using either a Force cage or ysalamiri until we felt he wasn’t a danger to others or we could put him in carbonite (as you can imagine that suggestion didn’t go over well with Uncle Han).

Han shook his head in confusion. "Can't you wave your hand and with your Jedi magic make him better?"

Luke frowned as he paced in front of the group tensely. "I've never heard of an unrepentant Sith being deprogrammed through the use of the light side of the Force."

"Well then…," Han's voice rose a bit in frustration. "Can't you make him forget he's Sith…that he ever met Lumiya?" Han shifted in his seat so he was facing Luke fully. "You've done it before with those two stormtroopers on Dathomir, remember? You made them forget they saw you."

"Yes," Luke nodded slowly. "What you are suggesting is a memory rub. It is not something the Jedi usually do. It can be done with the light side of the Force, but it is usually practiced by Sith."

Han made a frustrated gesture with his hand. "Luke you've done it before. You know how to do it. If you make Jacen forget about Lumiya and her teachings, then he wouldn't be Sith," Han argued. "He wouldn't be a danger to anybody and he can go back to being the Jedi he was before."

Luke shook his head. "I can't do it Han. It worked on those weak-minded Stormtroopers, but it won't work on a trained Jedi. Jacen needs to be conscious for it to happen and he will block my efforts through the Force."

"Then do it here," Jaina spoke up.

Luke gave her an incredulous look. "If Jacen doesn't have the Force, then neither do I." Luke pointed out the obvious.

Jaina motioned towards my dad. "But he does."

"What?" My father sat back in his chair shocked. "Whoa, no, no, no. I don't want to be screwing around in his head."

"If we did that," Leia said in a quiet, hopeful voice. "Would that mean we can pretend none of this happened?"

Luke's jaw tightened as he stared at the ceiling in thought. "I don't know…it doesn't really matter because I never trained Mark to do that technique. We'd have to leave the planet for me to teach him."

"Mark," Aunt Mara turned toward my father, "You know how to do a memory rub, don't you?"

I could see the muscles in my dad’s jaw tighten. "You know I do." He looked over to Mara. "You watched the Emperor wipe away the memories of more than one of his enemies."

Mara closed her eyes. "Yes, I have."

"I won't do it," my dad said defiantly. "If I make a mistake the results could be devastating."

"You're right." My uncle Luke responded. "And I wouldn't ask you to do something like that anyway."

"Wait, wait." Han stood and walked over to my dad placing a hand on his shoulder. "Before you all disregard this possibility, can I first talk to Mark privately?"

My dad looked at Uncle Luke for permission. When Luke nodded the two men stood and left the dayroom and went somewhere to talk.

Once my dad was out of the room I knew the memory rub was a foregone conclusion. My dad idolizes my Uncle Han. It was Han Solo that found my father on Wayland. My dad often told me that if it weren’t for Han he would have died under the rubble of Mount Tantiss. My father owes everything to the man and I knew he would do anything to help the Solos.

After about ten minutes they returned. The sick look on my father’s face let me know he agreed to do the memory rub.

We discussed this at length and realized it wouldn’t help doing the rub if anybody told Jacen what happened and jarred his memory. Therefore, we all made a pact that day that we would never tell another living soul about Jacen’s apprenticeship with Lumiya and his attack on the family. This information would stay with those that already knew. That meant Jak, Owen, Hanna, Anakin & Tahiri wouldn’t be told about Jacen’s brush with the darkside.

Instead my father came up with a cover story to tell the public. We would tell people that Jacen, Ben, Mara and my father followed Lumiya to Kavan. There, Lumiya attacked Mara and escaped. Ben brought his mother to the hospital while Jacen and my father chased her off planet and forced her down on Myrkr. While there Jacen fought and killed the Sith. In the battle he sustained a head injury and it resulted in amnesia.

My Aunt Mara wasn’t thrilled that Jacen was the hero of this cover story, but my dad insisted on that point. He said if he was going to rip memories out of Jacen’s brain he was going to replace them with a nice story.

We decided my dad would do the memory rub tomorrow. We all needed a good night’s sleep.

Entry 138

The next day my family filed into the room Jacen was being held. I hung back in the doorway. I really didn’t feel right about this. Everybody thinks Jacen started his slide to the darkside prior to him leaving for his search for Force knowledge. That is years of memories. I can’t imagine somebody taking my memories. Would I forget about my son, my friends, my adventures?

I was in the room long enough for Jaden to bring Jacen out of sedation. Jacen woke up and looked at the sad and heartbroken faces of his family members surrounding his bed and came to a frightening conclusion. “Are you going to kill me?” he asked.

That was it. I left the room. I walked down the hall, sat on the floor and leaned against the wall. Why would Jacen think we would kill him? Even if we thought he was the most ruthless Sith Lord in the galaxy, Uncle Luke would try to redeem him. I know I must be missing a huge piece of the puzzle. None of this makes sense.

After a while I heard a commotion going on in the room. Soon afterwards I saw my father rush from the chamber and headed for the ‘fresher. My uncle Luke followed him. I closed my eyes and feared the worst had happened. I waited for my father to return, but when he didn’t I got up and walked back to Jacen’s room. My cousin was lying in bed looking very confused and asking why he was shackled to the cot.

"Sorry about that Jacen,” my brother said. “You were thrashing about a bit and pulling out your intravenous line.”

Jaden uncuffed Jacen and then removed the IV. My cousin asked what had happened to him and we repeated the false story we agreed upon—he pursued Lumiya to Myrkr and killed her.

Jacen nodded slowly. I can tell he was trying to remember, but couldn’t. "So what happened to me?"

"You received a blow to the head," Jaden explained. "When I talked to you earlier you appeared to be suffering from retrograde amnesia. I put you under sedation to allow you to heal.”

After a moment Jacen suddenly shouted. "Wait! I can't feel the Force! Did I lose the ability to touch the Force?"

"No, no, we're on Myrkr!" Jaden reassured him. "It's the ysalamiri. Don't worry."

Jacen let out a relieved breath. "You all look older…this amnesia…how pronounced is it?"

"We don't know son," Han said softly. "What is the last mission or event you remember?"

Jacen frowned in concentration. "I remember," he hesitated in thought. "I guess the last big event I remember was Anakin and I going on a Jedi Mission to the Gargon system."

Jacen's mother gasped and all in the room glanced at each other with a look of shock.

"Okay…I guess from that reaction, a lot of time has passed." Jacen ventured. "How much?" He looked at me, but I averted my eyes. Jacen turned to his sister. "Jaina, how long?"

She closed her eyes and sighed. "Almost six years."

Jacen gazed ahead blankly. "That explains why everybody looks so different." He turned to Jaden. "I guess you completed medical school then?"

Jaden nodded. "Yes."

"Good, I thought a pre-med student was treating me." Jacen rubbed a hand over his eyes. "Jaden, will I regain my memory?"

Jaden shook his head. "We don't know."

He nodded sadly. "Six years? What happened in the last six years? That's a long time to lose." He gazed at his sister and gave her a faint smile. "You have to help me remember, Jaina."

His sister's eyes started to glisten with tears. "I will Jacen, we all will. We'll tell you what we can."

"Okay," Jacen nodded, but then looked up at his sister questioningly. "So, did you ever marry Kyp?"

"What?" Jaina looked alarmed. I noticed the Solos looked equally distressed, but I can tell Ben, Jaden and I are trying not to crack up at that comment.

"What does that mean?" Han asked his daughter through grinding teeth. "Kyp is almost fifteen years older than you!"

She held up her hands. "Dad, he had a crush on me. We never did anything." She glared at her brother. "Jacen where did you get the idea that Kyp and I were dating?"

Jacen shrugged as he tried to concentrate on the answer. "Well, the guy did have a holocube shrine to you in his room and all of his skin-holos featured women who looked like you."

"What?!" Jaina and Leia shouted simultaneously.

"Okaaaaay," Jaden drew out the word as he placed a hand on Jacen's shoulder pushing him back down to the mattress. "I think we should wait until the sedation medication is totally out of your system before we talk." Jaden looked up to Jaina and Leia and gave them a discomfited smile. "People coming out of a drug induced unconsciousness often say things they normally would keep to themselves." He looked at the other people in the room. "I know everybody wants to talk to him, but I think he needs to rest for a while." When nobody moved Jaden made a shooing motion with his hand. "Just give him an hour or so. Please."

Reluctantly we all left the room leaving Jaden sitting next to him. I wanted to hear more about this Jaina and Kyp scenario. As far as I knew the guy Jaina was dating is this Imperial pilot named Jagged Fel. I bet that makes Han crazy that his daughter is dating somebody from the Imperial Remnant.

As I walked down the hall I realized that Jacen may not remember his niece and nephew. Stang this sucks.

 

Nice recap of Sacrifices events The "rub" seems to have worked I over the exchange about K/J. Hee! I always thought she was the one with the crush early on Loved also the reunion between Ben and Mara, very sweet.

 

Great to see Jacen saved from the dark. And I hope Mark Tantiss will be alright too. He and Talon are great characters

 

Very nice recap of the events in Sacrifices. I thought it was funny how Talon is worried that Jacen's won't recognize his niece and nephew.

 

Sucks majorly..

 

Meeeeeeeeesa back. And happy to be reading. I like reading this from Talon's POV. I love Ben's happiness to see his mother. It brought a tear to my eyes. Can't wait for more!!

 

Thanks ginchy, EmeraldJediFire, Hazel, earlybird-obi-wan and Nyota's Heart for reading and taking the time to review. It is nice to see you back ginchy! Hopefully your new computer doesn't give you any trouble. Now start writing! I am finishing up the Sacrifices era and then I can get back to Zylie and Talon's romance. Thanks everybody for reading!

~JL~
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Entry 139

As the sun set over the Myrkr forest, I found my dad sitting on a bench outside as he held his pet ysalamiri on his lap. As I walked up to him I didn’t need the Force to tell he was depressed. I sat down and he gave me a faint smile acknowledging my presence. “You okay, dad?”

He nodded as he scratched his ysalamiri behind her ears. The animal turned and rubbed her face against his hand and then climbed up his chest so she could rub her reptilian face against his bearded chin. My dad always saw this as a sign of affection. I think it is more likely that his pet was simply putting her scent on him and marking her territory. Dad smiled at the ysalamiri and then looked out to the Myrkr forest. “I captured her in this forest decades ago. We realized the Emperor somehow survived his confrontation with Vader and was now on Byss. Karrde thought if a ysalamiri was good enough to capture a Jedi Master, it possibly could work with a Sith.”

“It was a good idea,” I said.

“This is the first time Nibbles has been back to her home. I wonder if she misses being in the wild?”

“I doubt she misses being hunted by vornskrs. She’s probably lived twice the lifespan of a wild ysalamiri.” I gave dad a knowing look. “You aren’t out here pouting because you think Nibbles is homesick. You’ve been out of sorts since the memory rub. Do you think it was a mistake?”

“Yes,” my dad said slowly. “But at the time it seemed like the most humane and effective way of bringing Jacen back.”

“Then why are you upset?”

My dad closed his eyes for a moment before he opened them and looked at me sadly. “Although on the surface it looked like I did the procedure successfully, I kriff’d up royally. I took too many memories from Jacen. I didn’t have the skill to be precise. I knew the procedure from Palpatine’s recollections, but the Emperor was never one for finesse. He would just yank out memories without worrying about taking too much.” He sighed and scratched the top of the ysalamiri’s head as he gazed out at the forest. “We believed Jacen started his slide to the dark right before he left on his journey for Force knowledge. When I did the rub I started there. The memory rub only took a few seconds, but during that time his thoughts rushed over me like a jumble of holofilms playing at one time. After it was over it took me a moment to make sense out of what I saw. It was then that I realized my mistake.”

“Which was?”

“Jacen’s association with Lumiya and his slide to the dark only occurred in the last few months. I didn’t see anything during his journey for Force knowledge that would make him dark. He learned some unique Force techniques from some less than reputable sources, but nothing I would consider Sith. I erased six years of memories for no good reason. Six years of memories… things that he would want to remember…things that he should remember.” My father’s head drooped. “I’ll never forgive myself.”

I put a hand on his shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze. “It’s not your fault dad. This is what the family wanted. He was working with a Sith. Jacen did try to kill or injure three of his family members. We had no choice.” I hesitated for a moment intriqued that dad was able to see some of Jacen’s memories. I had to pose the question that was just begging to be asked. “Dad, while Jacen was working with Lumiya, did he do anything bad that we didn’t know about? Did you see any connection between Lumiya, Jacen and the Hapan plague?”

My father lifted his head and gave me a hard look before sighing and rubbing a hand over his eyes. “One should never be privy to another person’s most personal thoughts. I saw some of Jacen’s most private moments, his highs and his lows. I am going to guard Jacen’s privacy. You have your cousin back. He’s the Jacen you grew up with, devoid of any Sith influence. That’s what the family wanted and that’s what they got.” My father gave me a stern look. “We made a pact that once the memory rub was done we would never speak of Jacen’s association with Lumiya. I expect you to honor that pledge. Leave the investigation of the plague to the Hapans.”

I was taken aback by the intensity of my father’s words. “Okay.”

My dad stood. “Don’t worry. If Jacen needs to know something, I’ll try to find a way to get the information to him.” He smiled. “He’s family and family comes before anything else. I’ll make things right.” With that said he put his pet ysalamiri on his shoulder and walked back into the building leaving me sitting alone.

I trust my father will do just that…make things right. Family first, Family always… that’s my father’s motto. To him family was more important than the Galactic Alliance, our Jump Trooper brothers or even the Jedi Order.

This past week has shown how far my father would go to protect his loved ones.


Entry 140

We all returned to Coruscant. We put in our false reports, delivered Lumiya’s body to the police and started telling lies about what happened. I still can’t believe I’m involved in a conspiracy. Oh who am I kidding…I always thought I would be involved in a conspiracy, just not one with my Uncle Luke as a co-conspirator. I know this is really bothering the Grand Master, but it’s what we all agreed upon.

Jacen is still in the Temple infirmary. Jaden told him it was to make sure there weren’t complications from his brain injury. Of course I know it is because we're afraid that his memory will come back and he’ll turn to the darkside again (if he ever was really dark. I’m not convinced despite all that he did). So far he appears normal and he’s acting like the Jacen we always knew. Still, Jaden, Jaina, Ben and I have been tasked to keep a close watch on him.

I stopped by to ‘visit’ (I like that word better than ‘guard’) Jacen for an hour or so while Jaden went out to lunch. He was lying in bed reviewing news stories from the last six years. He has a lot of catching up to do. Jacen smiled when I entered his room. He put away his datapad and motioned for me to sit down.

“How are you feeling, Jacen?”

He rubbed a hand over his face where he was once bruised. “I feel physically fine.” He paused then dropped his head and sighed. “Talon, I’ve been reading my mission reports and reviewing news stories from the HoloNet, but none of that tells me what was going on in my personal life.” He sat up straighter in his bed and adjusted the mattress to a more upright position. “My brother and sister have been trying to help me, but nobody seems to know if I…” He hesitated for a moment. “Did I…was I seeing anybody? I’m thirty-one…I thought I’d be married by now to…to someone. Of course, if I were dating, wouldn’t she have come to visit me by now? My family and friends have show up, but none of my female friends mentioned anything. I talked to your brother and he didn’t know if I was dating anybody. I thought you might know.”

I was uncomfortable with this conversation because I realized my father could probably answer this question, but I can’t tell Jacen that. The best I could do is to pass along this information to my dad and hope he acts on it. “Sorry Jacen. I’ve never seen you around anybody other than Tenel Ka.”

He glanced at me sharply. “Were we dating?”

My stomach dropped as I heard the hope in his voice. “Not that I know of, I just meant that when you were young you two hung out together.”

Jacen’s shoulders slumped. “Do you know who fathered her child?”

I shook my head. “No, she won’t tell anybody. My father said that’s probably a political maneuver to keep assassins from her daughter. If the matriarchs of the various royal families thought it was possible one of her sons fathered the child they would be less likely to put an assassination contract on the princess.”

Jacen looked horrified. “How many guys did she sleep with?”

I had to laugh. “Probably just one, Jacen. She doesn’t have to sleep with men for them to say they did. Guys lie about having sex with women all the time. Believe me, I work extensively in all-male combat units. The soldiers tell stories where they are scoring with women by the shipload. But I could tell they’re lying. Ninety percent of their stories are testosterone-fueled bravado.”

Jacen smirked. “Does that apply to you?”

I laughed. “Especially for me, although I’m not the one telling the stories. I have been with probably a dozen women over the last ten years…not the hundreds that the holozines like to pin on me.”

Jacen snorted, “That’s ten more than I’ve had.”

My eyebrow rose. “Oh really. I didn’t know you ever dated anybody.”

“I dated two at least.” He shrugged. “Of course, I can’t remember the last six years. I could have bedded hundreds of women during that time.” He said that with a serious face but then burst out in laughter. “Seriously, I dated a couple women after Tenel Ka left the Academy. I figured I had no chance with the Queen so I should set my sights on somebody that was more attainable…but they never worked out.”

“Why not?”

He gave me a sad smile. “They weren’t Tenel Ka.”

“Oh,” I said feeling heartbroken for my cousin. I know I probably should still be mad at him for the things he did, but I’m not. I just feel sorry for him. “I’ll ask around and try to figure out if you were dating somebody on the sly.”

“Thanks,” he said with a sad smile. “Tell me what’s been going on in your love life in the last six years.”

I laughed. “That’s a long story.”

Jacen smiled. “That’s okay, until Cilghal discharges me from the hospital, I have nothing but time on my hands.”


Entry 141

Tenel Ka must have heard about Jacen’s injury because she traveled to Coruscant to visit her old friend. I was really relieved when I heard that her and her daughter weren’t on Hapes when the plague broke out. She’ll probably stay on Coruscant until the outbreak is fully contained and investigated, which is good for Jacen. Maybe they can spend some time together. I know she has a child, but I also know Jacen would accept her daughter as his own if he could be with Tenel Ka. I wish he could get up the nerve to ask her out.

Then a horrible thought came to mind, maybe he did ask to date her and she turned him down. That would have been awful for him. It doesn’t seem right that they aren’t together.


Entry 142

Shortly after Tenel Ka’s arrival, my mom told me that dad’s friend Deke Tavik—Commander of Tenel Ka’s personal security force—showed up to talk to my father. She wasn’t sure what they discussed but dad looked troubled. He went into his room, packed some things and then told my mom he had some work to do. My mother knew better than question him when he has that look on his face. It’s not unusual for my father to get called out on Jedi or Jump Trooper business at the last minute, but my mother said she thought this was something different… and I think she’s right. Commander Tavik and my dad left Coruscant without filing a flight plan. The Grand Master had no clue as to where they went and supposedly Tenel Ka doesn’t know either.

This is very suspicious.


Entry 143

After a week or so, my Dad returned home and immediately put in his resignation from the Jedi Order. When I asked him about this he said he was getting too old for Jedi adventures, which is a load of bantha dung. He’s hiding something.

I thought I would be able to figure it out using my post-cognitive abilities. My dad had put in a salvage claim on Lumiya’s silver spaceship and I am fairly sure that was the ship he used on his clandestine mission. All I would have to do is touch it and possibly get a glimpse of the truth. Unfortunately, when I looked for it in the Temple hanger I couldn’t find it.

I later discovered my dad sold it and bought a brand new shuttle. He said Mom didn’t want to travel around in a Sith ship. That might be true, but still…I don’t know…something doesn’t sound right.

I’m probably overreacting. It’s possible he retired from the Jedi Order because he feels guilty over the memory rub and doesn’t want to face Jacen everyday in the temple. My father said he and mom would eventually move out of the Jedi Academy and into an apartment close to the restaurant they own. They were just waiting for the right place to come on the market.

Still…something doesn’t sit right with this situation.



Entry 144

Today was a shocker. First of all, I found out that Tahiri is pregnant again. Okay, that isn’t that astonishing.

Second, Tenel Ka announced that she and Jacen were secretly married years ago and Allana is Jacen’s daughter. Now that is amazing! I didn’t see that one coming. I saw Jacen shortly after the announcement and he was downright beaming with joy. I’m happy for him and his family. I just wish he could remember all the good times he had with his wife and child.

Third, I am hearing rumors that Jaina’s Imperial boyfriend had proposed to her and she said yes.

But the most unbelievable thing of all was Jaden’s surprise for the family. He asked if we could all meet at my parents' apartment because he had an announcement to make. Jysella was with him, which I thought was odd. He told my parents that after he discovered the extreme stress Jacen was under while trying to conceal his marriage and child, he decided to reveal his secret relationship. He and Jysella have been dating for the last year and he proposed marriage to her yesterday and she said yes.

My mom said, “What!? Why did you hide this?”

Jaden looked at my dad and said, “I knew dad and Jysella’s dad don’t get along.”

My dad frowned. “We get along fine. We just like to harass each other.” He got up and slapped my brother on the shoulder. “I’m happy for you, son.” He turned to Jysella and smiled at her brightly. “Welcome to the family.”

Of course my mother was crying and hugging Jysella and then my brother.

Damn! My brother told me he had a beautiful girlfriend and he wasn’t lying. I congratulated the two.

Jysella was all excited and said, “Come on Jaden, let's tell my parents.”

I noticed a bit of unease cross Jaden’s face, but he put on a brave façade and went to break the good news to her parents. After they left my mother turned to me. “It seems everybody has some big secret. Why don’t you tell me about yours?”

I know my eyes went wide and my breath arrested in my chest. How would my mother know about my son? “What secret is that?” I asked trying to buy myself some time to think.

My mom rolled her eyes. “About Zylie. Why didn’t you tell us you were dating Zylie?”

I let out a relieved breath and I noticed my dad’s eyes narrow with suspicion. “I met up with Zylie a few months ago. We just started to date. There really wasn’t anything to tell, Mom. We’re not engaged or anything.”

My mom smiled softly. “You be good to her, Talon.”

“I will Mom, I promise.” I looked at my wrist-chrono. “I have a meeting to go to. I’ll see you later.”

I was walking away from my parents’ quarters when my dad caught up with me in the corridor and grabbed me by my tunic.

“I want to talk to you.” He had a serious look on his face telling me he knew I was hiding something. He looked around and pulled me into an empty dayroom. “Talon, I felt in the Force shear panic coming from you when you mother asked you to reveal your secret. And when she mentioned Zylie you were relieved.” He crossed his arms across his chest. “What secret are you keeping?”

I shook my head. “I can’t tell you dad.”

My father put his hand on my shoulder. “Talon, there shouldn’t be any secrets from your family. If you can’t trust us, who can you trust?”

I had to laugh. “No secrets! How can you say that with a straight face after what's happened in the last few weeks?”

My father didn’t laugh; he just stood there expecting an answer from me. I squared my shoulders and looked my father in the eye. “You’re right dad; we shouldn’t have secrets from each other. So why don’t you go first with your secret. Where did you go with your friend Deke Tavik—the Commander of Tenel Ka’s personal security force? The Grand Master didn’t even know where you went. And why did you put in your resignation from the Jedi Order immediately upon your return?”

My dad dropped his hand from my shoulder. “I can’t tell you because it would jeopardize the lives of many people including your family.”

I nodded. “That’s the reason I can’t tell you my secret. It would jeopardize the life of a family member and many other innocent people.” I gazed at my father intently. “Dad, you always told me there are some truths that should always remain secret. I know you were referring to the memories you gained from the Emperor Reborn, but it is true nonetheless. Sometimes telling the truth doesn’t help a damn thing.”

He nodded slowly. “You’re right.” He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “I hope your secret isn’t as bad as mine.” With that he walked out of the dayroom and returned to his quarters.

I stood there stunned. What in the worlds was my dad hiding?

 

Intense conversations and many secrets--kept and revealed. Glad some of them were happy ones.

 

Intrigue! Love it! (since I seem to have forgotten this part of Sacrifices)

 

The conversation between Tavik and Mark is in Chapter 42 if you'd like a reminder. Since Talon never finds out the truth he can only guess throughout his journal.

 

Will do


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

Exciting stuff is happening. I love to see Jacen happy with Tenel Ka and his daughter.
More secrets? Waiting for the revellation

 

All these secrets are certainly taking their tole on Mark and Talon is sensitive enough to pick up on it.

 

Unfortunately for Talon, he never knows for sure what Jacen did, but he has his suspicions…that are pretty much right. Only Mark and Commander Tavik know the truth. They didn't even tell the Queen the whole story and the Jedi were all left out of the loop. Mark is taking care of the family.

Hazel --Mark hated most of what happened in Sacrifices, but he was willing to bear the burden and he is not going to put that burden on Talon or any other Jedi.

EmeraldJediFire -- Thanks! I'm glad you like it.

Nyota's Heart -- I'm glad there was some good that came out of this.

Well, this Friday is the start of NaNoWriMo. I suspect my updating of the Journal will slow down at that point. This post will finish up the time frame that my fanfic Sacrifices fell into. Talon has put down his thoughts on the matter and he is fairly perceptive. I think all the other Jedi are in denial. Han and Leia absolutely refuse to consider the idea that Jacen could be involved with the deaths on Hapes. And Luke and Mara don't want to believe it. Only Talon and maybe Jaden consider it possible and that is because they know their father and his actions say a lot to them. I hope this wasn't too confusing for some readers. At the end of this post we are back to Zylie and Talon and their relationship.

Thanks for reading!

~JL~

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Entry 145

Through security holocams, the Hapan government has finally identified Lumiya as the assassin who released a nanovirus within the royal palace that killed or sickened many Hapan royals.

I was queasy when I heard the news. I was hoping my suspicions were wrong, but they appear to be spot on. Of course, that particular HoloNet news bulletin greatly increased the pucker-factor when it came to dealing with our ‘Darth Jacen’ cover-up (that is the term I use when thinking about the situation). I know Ben and Jaden have been acting nervous, but we don’t dare talk about it.

I have to admit, there is an upside to this turn of events. Because we had announced that Jacen was the Jedi who killed Lumiya he instantly became a hero of the Hapan people. Jacen’s new status allowed Tenel Ka to take him as her official consort without much protest and Jacen can now live openly with his family.

But there is a downside…and it’s a really bad downside. If the Hapans ever got the tiniest hint that Jacen worked with Lumiya the mynock crap would hit the exhaust port fan so hard our family, the Jedi and Tenel Ka would be devastated.

No, devastated is too kind of a word. It would literally destroy our family and the Jedi Order. The Jedi would be seen as liars who conspired to protect another Jedi and family member. Tenel Ka could possibly be forced from her throne. The Galactic Alliance would be pissed that we jeopardized the long-standing relationship between the Hapan government and the Galactic Alliance. The Solo, Skywalker and Tantiss families would be publically disgraced and ostracized. I know that sounds extreme, but I don’t think I am over-exaggerating one bit. This would be an intergalactic political incident involving the assassination of royals and a cover-up headed by the Grand Master himself.

The only thing that could conceivably make this situation worse would be if Jacen had anything to do with the planning and execution of the plague. Up to now I thought Lumiya did it on her own because I refused to believe Jacen would do anything that could possibly risk the life of Tenel Ka. But now I realize Tenel Ka and her daughter were conveniently off planet and out of danger when the plague hit. I was also told there were multiple assassination attempts on Tenel Ka and Allana prior to the plague outbreak. Therefore, Jacen had a huge motive to eliminate the people who threatened his family.

As it stands now, a majority of the most hostile and backstabbing royals are dead. Jacen is officially the Queen’s consort and he gets to live happily ever after with his wife and daughter. Things couldn’t have worked out better if Jacen planned it himself…which, I hate to say, he probably did.

My original theory was Lumiya used the nanovirus to show Jacen she could hurt his friends if he didn’t join her. Now I wonder if Jacen got Lumiya to plant the virus in exchange for his apprenticeship. I was always perplexed as to what Jacen could gain from his association with Lumiya…and having her kill his family’s enemies would be a huge benefit to him.

Stang! I get the shivers just thinking about this. Now I really hope dad and Tavik’s disappearance was to make sure Jacen’s secrets remained safe (whatever those secrets are).

If dad had some insight from Jacen’s memories he would know where to go and what to do to make sure nothing gets traced back to Jacen. How he and Tavik would accomplish that, I don’t know, but for dad to decide it was best that he wasn’t a Jedi upon his return he must have done something very unpleasant.

I know it is not very Jedi-like to say this, but I hope my father did the mother-of-all cover-ups and got rid of all the evidence.

After all, the truth won’t bring back the dead and Jacen is no longer a threat to anybody. The facts coming out now can only make matters worse.

I have triple password-protected this journal and put in a safeguard that destroys the hard drive if anybody attempts to slice into it. I probably shouldn’t be writing about this at all, but it helps me cope since I am to never discuss this situation again…even with people who know most of the details.

I’ve been on edge since we got back from Myrkr. This is a mega cluster-kriff.

Entry 146

Cilghal medically discharged Jacen this week (meaning Uncle Luke thought my cousin no longer posed a danger to others) and he immediately began getting reacquainted with his wife and child.

Zylie had been preparing for her mid-term exams, so she didn’t notice I was camping out in the Temple infirmary for the last week. When I finally caught up with her she asked me what happened. She had seen some HoloNet reports, but she wasn’t sure if they were accurate. I gave her our agreed upon cover story. My dad had already contacted her father and told him what we decided to say about Jacen’s brush with the dark side, but I guess her dad hadn’t talked to her yet.

I’m still nervous. I really hope nobody finds out the truth. My father looks fairly calm, so that’s a good sign.

Entry 147

Zylie is done with her mid-term exams. Now we have time to hang out again. She sometimes comes over to my apartment and we watch holofilms with Jaden and Jysella. I can’t believe those two had me fooled for so long. Now that the secret is out Jysella is almost like another roommate. I have asked my brother to confine his ‘tutoring’ to his bedroom. I really don’t like walking in on them necking on the couch.

I am happy for them though and since Jysella is studying to be a doctor there is little chance of her going off on dangerous missions like other Jedi. I am sure that is a relief to Jaden.

We go out on double dates often, usually to the clubs. Often we see Valin in the nightclubs cruising for women. Jysella will wave at him and then plop onto my brother’s lap and give him an amorous kiss. Valin will shake his head, but he no longer gives my brother any grief. I was told Corran and Mirax Horn were very happy with Jysella’s choice in a mate and they would probably kill Valin if he tried to give Jaden a hard time about feeling up his sister. Anyway, they are engaged. He needs to ease up on the protective big brother routine. Ha.

Entry 148

Tenel Ka is still on Coruscant. I saw her and Jacen walking around the temple each holding one of Allana’s hands and sometimes picking the girl up off the ground. Their daughter would burst out in laugher every time her feet left the floor. It’s good to see them together. Jacen waved me over and introduced me to his daughter.

She greeted me in a formal manner that reminded me so much of her mother, but her features were pure Solo. I could see a hint of the Solo smirk shining through. I don’t know why I never saw the resemblance before. I have seen holovids of the Queen’s daughter on occasion, but it never occurred to me that she could be Jacen’s daughter. Of course, I was always under the impression he went on his journey for Force knowledge before Allana was conceived. Obviously Jacen hung around Hapes long enough to knock up Tenel Ka. I wonder why he was gone so long? I didn’t want to ask, but I bet when he left he didn’t know she was pregnant. That must have been a shock when he returned home.

Surprise…you have a kid!

I know how that feels. Hopefully in the last year or so he had time to be with his family…of course he wouldn’t remember those good times, but at least his daughter would have the memories.

Entry 149

Zylie talked me into going clothes shopping with her today. Arrrggghhh! The last thing I wanted to do is to go clothes shopping, but when I told her ‘no’ she blinked those big, sad hazel eyes at me in a way that always makes my insides go to goo. Damn that woman.

We went to the Mall of Coruscant, which is a huge local mall. In fact I think it is the biggest mall in the northern hemisphere. There is one bigger down south, but this mall has a better variety of stores (At least that is what Zylie told me).

We are three months into our No Sex For Six Months pact and Zylie is testing the limits of my endurance…and today was brutal. I let it be known that the Temple has a swimming pool and there are open hours for the Jedi and their guests to swim on the weekend. Naturally she wants to go swimming and decided all of her swimsuits are out-of-style and she needs a new one.

So that is how I ended up in a women’s clothing store, sitting outside the dressing room, while holding Zylie’s purse. Force! I really hoped nobody I knew saw me or I would never live it down.

She grabbed a number of suits and started modeling them for me. The first one is a black-and-white, one-piece suit with a plunging neckline and high cut legs. It looks good on her and I told her so.

I am ready to buy the suit and leave, but she wants to see how the other suits look on her. She goes back into the dressing room and then comes out with a two-piece. I swear my heart skipped a beat. Stang! She’s trying to tempt me. She was wearing a halter style top and the bottoms were not the traditional two-piece bottoms, but skimpy short-shorts. They actually cover more than a regular suit, but damn they look soooo good on her.

I cleared my throat. “I really like that suit…but didn’t you see that sign?” I pointed up to a posted notice saying: Please wear underwear while trying on swimsuits.

She rolled her eyes. “I am wearing underwear.” She turned and pulled down the backside of the suit revealing a little strip of cloth she called ‘underwear’. “It’s a thong. I can’t tell if a suit will look good on me if I am wearing granny-panties.”

I quickly looked away and pinched the bridge of my nose in frustration. Zylie is going to be the death of me. “Gods Zylie, did you dress like that at home?”

She laughed. “Are you kidding? My father would kill me.” She then winked at me and went back into the dressing room.

Right about now, I am hot and flustered. I had to put her purse over my lap because my body was misbehaving.

I just about jumped out of the chair when I heard a voice call my name. “Hey Talon!”

I look over and see Ben walking over to me. “I thought I sensed your presence in the Force.” He looked at me holding Zylie’s purse in my lap and laughed as he motioned his hand and made a whipping noise. “She’s got you holding her purse!” He started cracking up.

Of course Zylie takes that moment to come out with the third swimsuit and it is an itsy bitsy string bikini. The bottom was so small that it was almost not there. She smiled when she saw Ben. “Hi Ben! What do you think?” She turned around revealing most of her behind with the exception of an area cover by a small swath of triangular cloth that barely covered up her thong.

I looked back to Ben when I heard an audible gasp. His eyes went wide and his face burned red and it looked like he was having trouble breathing. He quickly turned around. “It looks great Zylie.” He chuckled uncomfortably. “Where’s the rest of your suit?”

I stood and quickly guided Zylie back into the dressing room. “The second suit. I like the second suit!”

She just laughed and went back into the fitting room.

I turned back to Ben who was now leaning against the wall. His back was to me but I could see his shoulders shaking letting me know he was laughing.

“Stang Talon!” He was finally able to say. “Your brother told me about your no-sex-for-six-months promise. How’s that going?”

“It’s hard!” I said drawing out the last word, which made Ben break out in laughter again.

“You really got your hands full with that girl.” He turned around and smirked. “I can’t wait to tell Valin about this.”

“Don’t!” I pleaded with Ben. “I have a reputation to uphold.”

He chuckled. “Okay, but you owe me one.”

He took off leaving me standing there red-faced and clutching a purse. “Gods, I’m whipped.”

 

Woot! LOL Yes Zylie knows what she is doing.

 

Great to see Jacen happy.
Talon has a lot to keep secret
LOL at the itsy bitsy bikini.
Men in a woman's clothes shop is always hilarious

 

Ooh, Zylie is pushing Talon ' s buttons

 

Thanks earlybird-obi-wan, Hazel, and Nyota's Heart for reading and taking the time to review. DRL has reared its ugly head again, so I probably won't be posting so regularly. I do have enough posts for the remainder of the year, so no worries about that.

Thanks again everybody!

~JL~

________________________________________________

Entry 150

We went swimming that weekend. My parents were there. Although my dad retired from the Jedi Order my parents haven’t moved out of the temple yet. My dad loves swimming and he is almost always at the pool. He’s wearing long shorts but I could tell he was still shaving his one leg to match his hairless prosthetic limb.

Zylie waved at my parents. They waved back and then my mom smacked dad lightly upside the head when he stared at Zylie a nanosecond too long. I heard my dad say to my mom, “I was just imagining that suit on you.”

Ack! My mother is great looking woman for a lady in her late fifties, but I still shuddered at the thought of her wearing a sexy halter top and short-shorts. Nobody wants to imagine their mother wearing skimpy outfits.

I guess the word got around that Zylie and I were in the pool because about a half hour later Ben shows up wearing a tight, square-cut swimsuit that outlined every curve and bulge of his bits-and-pieces. Stang Ben! He has inherited his father’s horrible fashion sense. That type of butt-hugging suit is popular with Corellians…not Coruscantis! Of course, those shorts got Zylie staring and saying that suit would look great on me. I swear Ben does this stuff just to get on my nerves. If it were anybody else I would suspect that he was trying to steal my girl away…but Ben wouldn’t do that to me.

Arrggghhhh! I am positive Zylie is now going to bring me shopping so I could get a square cut suit of my own (note to self: Don’t let her talk me into wearing a square cut swimsuit! RESIST TALON!).

As revenge I went over and pushed Ben into the pool. He then tried to ‘pants’ me while I was treading water, but I Force-shoved him away. My mom told us to act our age and stop the boisterous play. That was right before my dad started a splash fight with us. And I am not talking about using his hands to slap water towards us. He was using the Force to lift gallons of water up from behind and then dumping it on our heads. This continued until the lifeguard threatened to toss us all out of the pool.

Zylie thought it was funny. I swam over to where she was standing in shoulder-deep water. I kissed her and then grabbed her by the hips lifting her out of the water so I could get a better look at her swimsuit. “I love you in that outfit,” I said while giving her my best flirtatious grin. I lowered her back to her feet and kissed her again.

“Thank you.” She cocked her head to the side motioning me to look over to the lounge seats surrounding the pool. “You aren’t the only one that appreciates my swimsuit.”

I looked over in the direction indicated and saw a group of young male apprentices (probably between the age of fourteen and eighteen) sitting in deckchairs and staring at my girl. Stang! This is Coruscant…there isn’t a shortage of women on the planet. They don’t need to be gawking at my girlfriend.

I glared at the men and they all suddenly pretended that they were looking everywhere else but at Zylie.

“The show is over guys!” I yelled to them as Zylie and I got out of the pool to leave. The teens looked disappointed and started to get up to depart until they noticed Hanna Skywalker entering the pool area wearing a string bikini. It was an itty-bitty string bikini that was very similar to the one Zylie had tried on at the store. The young men smiled and immediately sank back into their lounge chairs.

Ha! I thought Ben was going to have a heart attack! Turnaround is fair play, though. If he gets to wear a revealing swimsuit why can’t his twenty-something sister?

I really doubt my Uncle Luke knows she is wearing that skimpy suit. If Luke found out those boys were leering at his daughter they might find themselves at the Ossus sub-temple. They better watch out.



Entry 151

It was the end of the semester for Zylie. I was supposed to bring her to Corellia where her parents' ship was docked. Unfortunately the shuttle my father gave me broke down (it was his ugly Headhunter/Shuttle abomination that he gave me after he had put in a salvage claim on Lumiya’s ship). So now I am looking to my friends to borrow a ship.

I asked Ben if I could use his shuttle to bring Zylie home. He said, “No, you can’t borrow it, but if you get me an invite to come along, I’ll bring you and Zylie there and back.”

I remember my eyes narrowed suspiciously. Ben has been acting a little flirtatious with my girlfriend but I didn’t think anything of it before, but now I am not so sure. “Ben, are you trying to hit up on Zylie?” I didn’t think it was possible, but I had to ask.

He grinned at me. “No, but Zylie has a sister…who, according to her, is unattached, I thought I might give you a ride out to the Wild Karrde and…I don’t know, hang around for a bit and get reacquainted with the Karrde family…especially Valla.”

I smirked. “That sounds like a great idea.”


Entry 152

We brought Ben’s shuttle into the orbital dock over Corellia where the Wild Karrde was berthed. Zylie ran up the boarding ramp of the ship and gave her parents a big hug. Ben and I walked up and Karrde shook our hands. I noticed he didn’t seem too upset about me dating his daughter anymore. Valla was there and Ben’s face lit up. Valla is a beautiful woman like her sister. She is five years older than Zylie but she has the same build and features. You can tell they are sisters. Ben quickly started a conversation with the woman and wandered off down the ship’s corridors.

Zylie gave me a knowing glance. “Is that why Ben wanted to come with us?”

“Yep.”

She smiled. “Good.”

I gave her a questioning look. “Why is that?”

“Because Valla has had the biggest crush on Ben since…forever.”

“Is she Ben’s secret admirer?”

“Yes.”

A wild smile spread across my face. That would be awesome if Ben finally found someone special. I know he has been depressed since Niki left Coruscant.


Entry 153

Zylie’s college break was ending so Ben brought us back to Coruscant. He looked depressed when we departed, so when Zylie left us alone in the cockpit I asked him about it. “Things didn’t work out with you and Valla?”

He looked over at me surprised. “What? Why would you say that?”

I shrugged. “You look depressed.”

He grinned. “I’m depressed because I had to leave Valla. Things went magnificently.”

I smirked. “How magnificently?”

He gave me a wink. “Well enough that I didn’t make a no-sex-for-six-months rule.”

“All right Ben,” I chuckled. “You and her…you two…”

He shook his head. “No, I was with her on a ship with her parents and a vornskr. I’m not that stupid.” He smiled at me. “But she is coming out to see me on Coruscant in a few weeks. Maybe I’ll model my awesome swimsuit for her.” His grin grew wider. “I noticed Zylie appreciated the cut of my shorts.”

I groaned. “Please, don’t flatter yourself.”

“We can ask her if you like,” he turned in his seat like he was going to call back to Zylie. I smacked him on the shoulder and scowled at him.

He just laughed.

 

Loved the swimming fun and water fights.
The boys are having fun with the girls

 

JL! So much pranking and teasing and pairing up. Just the kinda stuff I love!

 

Loved the fun by the pool and I'm glad Ben is hitting it off with Valla.

 

Thanks Hazel, Nyota's Heart, earlybird-obi-wan for reading and taking the time to comment. NaNo is kicking my butt this year. My computer crashed. I need to bring it in to the Geek Squad tomorrow. Also Darth Real Life has been sucking pretty bad lately.

Thanks everybody who is reading. I really appreciate it.

~JL~

______________________________________________________________________________

Entry 154

Here we are at five-and-a-half months into my relationship with Zylie and I am called out to duty on some rimworld planet. This is the one time I didn’t want to go out with the Jump Troopers. It’s been over six months since my last mission off planet. I guess I couldn’t expect to stay planetside and near Zylie forever.


Entry 155

My next mission was on the planet Ukio. It was a planet located on the Manda Merchant Route. It was also the planet that provided a huge percentage of crops not only for the surrounding planets but also the core worlds such as Coruscant.

The planet’s new ruling monarch decided to secede from the Galactic Alliance and at the same time triple the price of its exports. Of course the Galactic Alliance can’t let one planet put a strangle hold on dozens of planets needing food. They tried to negotiate, but when that failed they sent in an army to let the ruler know they meant business. The jump troopers went in and secured the ports and supply lines. Meanwhile, the GA effectively brokered a change of leadership for the planet…and by broker I mean we bombed the kriff out of the capital city until the ruling party surrendered.

I really didn’t like this situation. Planets should be able to secede in my opinion. Then they would have to provide their own planetary security. Eventually they will realize being part of the Alliance is the smartest move. I just don’t like forcing planets to stay because they have something the Alliance needs.

I can’t believe I would ever say this, but politics within the Galactic Alliance have gotten worse since Borsk Fey’lya’s resignation from office. I never thought I would miss that miserable Bothan.

The new Chief of State is a human male named Mokk Streke—a man who has managed to skyrocketed up the political ranks in the last decade. He started out as a minor planetary governor of the planet Fakir in the outer colonies region. He eventually became the senatorial representative for his planet and through either luck or amazing political skill he worked his way up the ranks until he eventually stepped into the void created by Fey’lya’s resignation. I have to admit, the new leader of the Galactic Alliance makes a good impression on the HoloNet. He is handsome, sharply dressed and has a commanding presence. Unfortunately, I have discovered he has no qualms when it comes to throwing Galactic Alliance Jump Troopers into what should be planetary skirmishes best resolved by local authorities.



Entry 156

Like I said in my earlier entry, I haven’t been on a mission with the military for over six months and I am now discovering that much has changed during my absence. The new Chief of State, Mokk Streke, apparently enjoys modifying things and he is driving everybody in the military crazy. About four months ago the Chief of State changed the name of the Jump Troopers to Void Jumpers. Supposedly it sounded manlier and Streke thought it would help recruitment. Then he decided to change the headgear worn by the common Galactic Alliance Soldier. Previously the headdress worn in garrison was a gray patrol cap with a stiff, rounded visor, and flat top. Elite soldiers like Jump Troopers wore a special black wedge cap with straight sides and a creased down the crown of the hat. It was adorned with the Jump Trooper symbol and the soldier’s rank.

Well, Mokk Streke decided that a great enlistment tool would be to give all soldiers the headgear previously worn only by elite Special Forces units. It’s like he’s saying, “Everybody is special in today’s Galactic Alliance Military”. That really pissed off the guys who worked hard to earn their wedge cap. I heard that General Kirrak, Commander of the Jump Trooper Division (I guess it is a Void Jumper Division now) protested adamantly. Chief of State Streke told him that the Void Jumpers were welcome to wear a different color if they desired. That wasn’t good enough for the General and the Jump Troopers ended up with a garrison cap that looked very much like the old Imperial officer cap with the sloping brim. I think that was some sort of message from the military to the Chief of State. If you are going to rule like an Emperor we might as well look like Imperial soldiers. Ha.



Entry 157

After a one month deployment I returned to Coruscant and found Zylie waiting for me in my quarters (my brother had let her in). She jumped into my arms and gave me a big kiss. This is the first time since we started dating that I went off to a war zone and it was upsetting to her. She was crying and hugging me.

“I heard there was some fierce fighting,” she said with a shaky voice. “Your brother told me we would know if you were hurt. That no news is good news.”

I gave her an ardent kiss and then pulled away with a smile. “He’s right. No need to worry.” I reached up and brushed some hair out of her eyes. “Hey, I’m a Jedi. This is what I do for a living.” I walked her over to the couch and sat down pulling her down next to me. “Zylie, dating a Jedi means I’ll often be gone and in harm’s way.” I gazed into her eyes intently. “You have to decide if that is the life you want. I won’t always be around and there will constantly be the worry about my welfare.”

She gave me a pitiful smile and for a moment I thought she was going to decide it wasn’t worth it, but her features brightened as she gave me a hug. “I guess it’s not much different than a smuggler’s life. My father was always getting into jams and shot at.”

I smiled. “So you are going to stick around?”

“Of course,” she said as she ran a hand down my chest. “Especially since we’ve been dating for six-and-a-half months already.”

“Oh,” I said nervously. “But I was gone a month, so we really should wait another two weeks.”

“What?!” Zylie bit out. She sounded a little irate.

I chuckled. “Zylie, our first time together shouldn’t be because of a date on a calendar. It should be special. I want the mood to be right.”

She groaned. “Why do you think I was waiting for you in your apartment?” She brought her hand up under my tunic and caressed my abdominal muscles and then up to my chest. She had to notice my heart was pounding uncontrollably.

I caught her hand as it started wandering below my beltline. “Zylie, not here at the Temple with Force sensitives surrounding us. You’ll drive me wild and I don’t think I could successfully shield my emotions during my first time with you. I don’t want everybody knowing our business.”

She sighed and nodded. “Okay.” She grabbed the holonet control and put on a movie. I snuggled up next to her and kissed her on the top of her head.

I was glad she understood. I wanted to wait until the perfect time and place.


Entry 158

Women always complain that men only have one thing on their mind—sex. You would think a man not badgering them for sex would be a welcome relief, but Zylie is not happy with waiting for the right moment.

To be honest, I am a little nervous about making love to her. I don’t think I’ve been anybody’s first lover before. I am so anxious I may not be able to perform at all. Of course, Zylie interprets my hesitancy completely different from what is actually going on in my mind (probably because she isn’t a mind reader. I really should have manned up and told her how nervous I was).

I was over at her dorm room happily watching a shockball game with her when she made a sigh of irritation. She grabbed the remote and turned off the game and then glared at me.

“Talon, when you made up that no-sex-for-six-months rule you said it was because you wanted to make sure this relationship would work before getting serious. Here we are going on seven months and we haven’t done anything more than kissing.” I saw a tear roll down her cheek as she took a calming breath. “So does this mean you don’t think this relationship is going to work?”

My jaw dropped. I never thought she would come to that conclusion. “No, Zylie, that’s not it.”

“Then what is it?” she demanded.

My heart was thudding in my chest as I tried to come up with the right words. “Zylie, I’m nervous about being your first. I’m also very scared that my bad luck in relationships will continue despite my best efforts to make things work.” I paused for a moment as I nervously drummed my fingers on my knees. “I’m nervous because I’ve never been this much in love with somebody. I've been really hurt before and I know that once I make love to you, there will be no going back for me. If you left me I would become emotionally devastated. It would kill me.”

“You love me?” she whispered.

“Of course.” I gave her a wistful smile. “I’ve never told you that?”

She shook her head. “You’ve said you love things about me, like ‘I love that dress on you’ or ‘I love it when you smile like that’. You never came out and said ‘I love you.’

I reached over, clasped her hand in mine and looked deeply into her eyes. “I love you Zylie. And I don’t just love you in a certain dress or because of your dazzling smile. I love your sarcastic sense of humor. I love how you make my heart flutter with a simply touch. I love how I think of you and only you. I don’t even notice other women any more…which is dangerous when I am driving a speeder in pedestrian zones.”

Zylie laughed and leaned in until her head rested against my shoulder. “I love everything about you.” I hooked a finger under her chin and tilted her head up so I could kiss her. It was a long, passionate kiss. When our lips separated I said, “I love you Zylie.”

“I love you too, Talon.”

“I don’t want to rush you. I can wait as long as you want.”

She rolled her eyes and whined. “I don’t want to wait anymore!”

I laughed and smiled at her lovingly. “So I guess what you’re saying is the right time and place is right here and now.”

She threw up her hands. “Yes! I’m tired of being sexually frustrated!”

I cracked up at that remark. “Okay,” I said as I leaned in for a kiss. “If you insist.”


Entry 159

Our first time together was beautiful. It was perfect. Well, almost perfect. After a night of love making Zylie rolled over to me and said with a smile. “That was wonderful. I’ve wanted to do that with you since I was fifteen.”

ACK! That gave me a squicky mental image that made me feel like a pervert. I frowned. “Zylie, please don’t make any reference to that particular childhood fantasy again. It makes me feel creepy.”

She just laughed. “Okay.” She cuddled up to me, rubbing a hand down my chest. “Is it okay to say that you exceeded any fantasy I’ve had about you?”

I groaned. “Only if you are referring to fantasies you conjured up after you reached the age of consent.”

She laughed. “Why are you feeling weird about me having a crush on you since I was young? It’s not like you were lusting after my young prepubescent body.” She raised her eyebrows questioningly. “Unless you were…”

I interrupted her sentence. “No, Zylie. I didn’t have any impure thoughts about you until you were nineteen and I saw you outside the temple.”

She giggled. “So you admit you started having sexual fantasies about me immediately after seeing me that day?“

I rolled my eyes. “No, I wasn’t having lustful thoughts about you immediately upon seeing you…it took a couple seconds for my brain to process how incredibly hot you were and then, yes, I was thinking about doing what we just did all night.”

“Then why did you torture me for six months?”

I laughed and then leaned in and kissed her. “Because you’re a special woman and I wanted to do things right.”

“And you didn’t want my father killing you,” she added.

I shrugged a shoulder. “That too.”

She kissed me along my jawline. “Can we do it some more?”

I chuckled. “I would love to.”

 

Awwwww. Poor Zylie. I think she was ready to kill Talon rather than kriff him. hahahahahahaa 6 months is a long time to wait! But it looks like it was well worth the wait. I like that Talon's a good guy, just like his dad. (He'd better be a good guy or his mom would kill him!!)

 

Yuck on the computer crash, best of luck on the NaNo and SQUEEEEEE! for this update. Yup, made me grin like a fool and melt like a popsicle in July