San Joaquin, CA Checking in

So, I guess everyone is too busy to bother to contact me to let me know how everyone is doing. You tell me that you are ill but do you then follow up by telling me if you are better or worse...you could have been eaten by rats or something. Could it hurt to pick up a phone and call to say I'm alive or maybe you are too busy with your hectic life of sneezing into a tissue. Far be it from me to want to impose on you but I worry. There is nothing as bad as Jedi germs. Remember little Hymie? Edith warned him about playing with the Jedi children espicailly what with the way they wear those long sleeves and no pockets. That is one thing I have to say about my Mort, he knew how to sew in a pocket. All those Jedi running around with those litte pouches...there is no room to keep importatn things such as a package of tissue. And what about allergy medication? Running around to all those strange worlds, you never know what you might catch and then you come home and rick infecting the rest of the family. But do the Jedi care? It would seem not or they would find a good tailor and think about pockets. My Sid would have been a great tailor just like his father but he decided to go into politics. When I think about how my Mort would sit and stare at the sign he had made saying "Papaltine and Son, Sith Tailors" it breaks my heart. But if this is what makes him happy then who am I to judge. Except he might want to consider going out with a nice girl every now and then. Grandchildren would be nice. Anyway, little Hymie was playing with the Jedi children even though Edith had told him not to and he sees that some of them have a runny nose. So there he is playing with the Jedi and he sees them wiping their noses with their sleeves. I don't know how many times Edith told Hymie, "turn the lightsaber off before you reach into your pocket." Lucky for Hymie he didn't really need that internal organ.
Well, I can see that it is getting late so I will say good bye for now and wait until someone decides to tell me what is happening in your lefe even if it is the officals telling me how you became rat chow.

Golda

 

Ok, I probably deserved that! Course, now I can't stop laughing and trying to type through the tears runing down my face and trying to breath.

Sorry Mother Palpatine...

 

will you ever forgive us?

 

[face_shocked] *Is very afraid of MotherPalpatine*

 

That sweet young girl with her cha cha's bursting out, asked if I could ever forgive all of you for neglecting me. Of course I can forgive you. Forgivness is what mothers do. Those we care about and look after are all that is important to us. Your happiness is all that matters. So we sit alone in a little dark room with nothing but our memories to keep us company. The important thing is that you are having fun and enjoying yourself. And we sit alone. On Mother's Day waiting for some sort of message. A call, a note, a brick through the window. Not that I expected to be remembered. I mean why would I think that you would even give me a thought.

My Sid once gave me a model of the universe he made out of left over take out. It was so sweet. He gives it to me and says, "here mother, I want you to have the universe and one day I will give you the real one no matter how many people and planets I have to destroy." I wept. My little Sid standing there holding this dripping sculpture while in his Senate robes promising me the universe. Do I hear from him yesterday? No. He's too busy training a new Dark Lord.

Edith couldn't wait to tell me what her little Hymie had done for her. Of course, I still remember when Hymie decided to make a bust of himself to give to Edith as a gift. It might have been wise for him to have someone there to help remove the plaster he used to make a mold of his head instead of trying to cut it off with his lightsaber by himself. They should have used a heavier metal in his head because he has such dents.

I have other things to do now. So go on with your life and give me a thought every other week or so if that is not too much trouble. Hopefully I won't fall and be eaten alive by the cats before someone notices my absence. You remember when little Hymie...oh, someone is at the door. Bye for now.

Rabb't Mother Golda Palpatine.

P.S. Yes I forgive, but I don't forget.

 

Yes, Mother.

Which, I think it's time we officially started "Ask Mother Palpatine...Advice Column"

So feel free to start the thread and we will go from there.