Saga Star Wars: The Outtakes "Choose your own weird Adventure Scriptment..."

NOTE: This does fit in the jurisdiction of the Saga Boards.....

I surf many, many Star Wars web sites. I came across this one, Tranquility Amongst the Stars, that was a fan fiction site. Under humor, they had this hilarious story someone posted, Episode I Outtakes. Well, I printed it out and showed it to some of my Star Wars buddies and we wrote some Episode II Outtakes.

Well, I've come to see you can write Outtakes for any freakin' Episode so why don't we? This isn't going to work out quite like a normal Choose your own Adventure thread. But I had an idea how to (I kinda took this idea from Scooby_Dooku, so I feel I have to give him credit...).

I was thinking (that is if anyone comes and posts) that 5 writers could come and sign up to write an outtake. Then, the good people of the boards could vote on the funnest....This could go on forever. We can have several different takes for one scene....That's what I love about this idea. IT NEVER ENDS!

You could write an outtake about anything in OT or PT, even Episode III if your heart desires. You just have to tell before hand the scene that is being posted. If anyone likes the idea and wants to write a scene post, "Sign me up," and your thoughts....

~Laughing_Gas

 

Wow. I love this idea. I cant write, but I think this is a great idea! We need some Star Wars humor.

 

Thanks, hey if you know anyone who wants to write, then send 'em here, please....

Positive feedback. A good sign for the first post.... *giggles with glee*

 

Yeah Laughing gas a great idea. I would write but I'm gonna be really busy soon.

 

Out-take from Episode II, Attack of the Clones.

Scene: Yoda fights Dooku in Geonosian landing pad.

Yoda ignights his lightsaber as it quickly moves to his hand through the force. The two both quickly jump into the battle.

Yoda makes amazing jumps, twirls, and spins to create an awsome battle between himself, and Count Dooku. Dooku quickly blocks most of the shots, but just in time, each time to save himself.

As Yoda makes a flying jump, his lightsaber quickly flies from his hand, and he falls in a jumbling mess onto the floor. Christefer Lee quickly runs over to the fallen Yoda.

Lee: Hey! Are you alright little one?? That was quite a fall!

Yoda: [Placing his hand on his chest] My pacemaker! Skipped a beat it has!

Lee: Do you think you're up for this?

Yoda: [Getting up slowly and pulling a small fishing line to get the lightsaber to come to his hand. Used to simulate the force.] Ok I am. Go on with the scene, we must!

An assistant runs up to Yoda with a waterbottle in hand. Yoda places his lightsaber on a string down, and takes the oversized waterbottle in his 2 hands. He pours himself a drink, as another assistant uses a mini-fan to cool off Lee. Several other people use lint removers on his dark cloak.

Just then, George Lucas walks into the view

Lucas: You gunna' be alright Yoda? Nick Gilliard isn't making the fight scenes too complicated is he?

Yoda: Fine they are. Able am I...

Lucas: I dunno'. You're getting kind of old for this man.

Yoda: [angered] When 900 years old you reach, do stunts as good you will not, hmm?

Lucas: Are you calling me out of shape?

Yoda: Perhaps I am. For me to know, and for you to find out, it is...

Lucas: Listen buddy! We don't need your crap here! I can just as soon hire Kermit to do this job!

Yoda: BAH! Up your a** you shove this job! Insult me you won't!

Yoda begins to walk away. Someone begins to hand him a cane, but he doesn't accually need it. He waves off the agent and storms off. [/b]

Lucas: I created you! You won't work in this town again!! I swear it!

Yoda: [turning around] If a middle finger I did have, flip you off I would!!

Lucas frowns

The End

 

OMG that was so fieaking hilarious, this is going to be great. if I think of anything I will post. good job Rush

 

Thanks Rush that was an amazing scene! That's kinda an example of how this could work. Everyone votes for the outtakes that should be in a final draft. Here's one of my many ideas.....



Episode II: Exceution Arena

(Anakin, Padme and Obi-Wan are seated on the back of one of the three monsters, when the droids come rolling out...)

Scene cuts

Mace Windu stands directly behind Jango Fett and Count Dooku. He ignites lightsaber right by Jango Fett's neck)

MACE - This party's over...

COUNT DOOKU - Are you sure. (He summons to a droid in the background. It's R4. He is carrying a tray of...) Can't I persuade you with some crumpets and tea?

MACE - Oh, why thank you! (He takes the whole tray and begins to eat all it's contents)

(While this is going on Anakin, Padme, and Obi-Wan, who are lightsaber-less, still remain seated. They are waiting for their cue to jump off, but instead the droids start firing)

(Up in the box seats all that can be heard is their shrill screams.)

MACE - (Looking up at Dooku and wiping the crumbs from his front.) TASTY!

 

when i saw this i could only imagine how retarded this would be but i am surprised in how funny these have been,especially yoda wanting to flip off lucas

 

Rage, I don't know whether to thank you for liking itor hate you for saying it's retarded. Thank you!

 

Does anyone want to sign up then?

 

I have another idea for somthing to write. Maybe this afternoon...

 

Cool, Rush. I guess this afternoon I'm going to work out a different way to do this then sign me up....

 

Come vote on the openong scroll for Star Wars Episode 0.5 Mystery of the Sith

 

how exactly will this work? is it just going to be a collection of the best, or like have a behind the scenes thing with all outtakes,similar to the simpson's episode "behind the laughter"

 

It'll be like ppl signing up to write an outtake (anyone they want) and we make a collection of the best by voting.

 

Ok, sign me up for the next Comedy Section

 

Awesomw!

1. Rush
2. LG (heck at the moment, I'm going to be the only 1 besides Rush)

Thanx Rush.

 

Star Wars, Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back.

Luke balances on one hand, while Yoda stands on one of his legs. He continually speaks of the force, as Luke begins to lift up rocks, and R2. The rocks float around weightless.

Suddenly, a rock falls right between Mark Hammel's legs, and cause him to fall right to the ground, into a fetal position. Yoda goes flying and R2 is slowly lowered to the ground from his fishing wire. The other rocks also are dropped.

Mark: [in a high pitched voice] Wha-...what was that??

Camera Man: Uh, yeah. One of the rock's strings snapped man. Sorry bout' that.

Yoda: Him? Worry about him you do? 900 years old I am! Fall from 6 feet in the air I just did!

Lucas: Oh yeah, sorry about that.

Yoda: Know you what a fall like that does to a little one like me? Throw my back out it does!

Mark: [still high pitched] Hey man! I just got a pound in the pills man! Ohhh! Ahhhh!

Yoda: Argue with me will you? Grumpy old man am I! Screw with me you shouldn't!

Mark: If I could move, I'd come over there and kick your green little a**!!!

Yoda: Anytime pretty boy! On bring it!

Lucas: Hey hey hey, let's not get out of control here!

Yoda: Stay out of this, you will! Or when you wake, your beard be gone it will!!

Lucas: Listen little man! I get crap from you all the time! We'd be more than willing to can you!

Yoda: [storming off] To my agent you will speak! Need this garbage I do not!

The End
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Mark: [high pitched] Ice...? A little ice please?

 

That was great rush.

And i like the idea of this thread Laughing_Gas, i hope it gose well for you.

 

Yeah, I hope this goes well also. I think it's pretty cool!

 

that was funny im nt that good with writing but ill think of some stuff so you can sign me up partially

whats with yoda always getting pissed off?

 

I thought it would be funny how calm and reassuring he is in the movies, to be a bastard in real life. I also enjoy causing tension between him and Lucas.

 

Rush, your good...

1. Rush
2. Rage
3. Laughing (or me.)

I've written a couple where Hayden calls Ewan butt ugly. They are really off the wall, but h*ll, that's the way I am. Luvthe writing Rage.

 

i see your point rush

 

I got a funny scene, but I haven't typed itup yet. I'll post it Monday, cause I'm going out of town to Chicago til Sunday.

See every1 the,
Laughing_Gas