"Ewan McGregor Meet Obi-Wan Kenobi"

Hello, everyone! Are you having a good day? Are you stuck in the horrible world of writer's block? Did you not ace your test today? Well, come in an relax. There may be a solution to your problem, or your day will get worse. Such an uplifting prospect, isn't it?

Anyway, this is next fic is a cross-over of sorts, only, there is no major time-warp or galactic phenomenon, just a pure whacked-out solution to a writer's block. :-D

In this story, you will learn that perhaps the idea of Star Wars being true isn't quite so far-fetched, and that maybe George Lucas was banned from the rest of the galaxy by Yoda himself.

You will first being taken to the world of sophomore college student Amy Kasten, whom is a struggling student and writer. The first chapter will be of her some-what awful day, and the little prayer that renders her into a bizarre adventure (also dragging a fellow JCer along with her). Amy is in fact Amidolee, but the name was changed because it's just freaky writing your own in a story. Also, I'm a sophomore in high school, but that wouldn't fit for the story Jedi Master Mara Jade will be collaborating and bringing her own bits in, and will play a substantial role in this fic Some names may be altered from real-life.

Guest stars: Ewan McGregor, George Lucas, Natalie Portman, Hayden (and the other Anakin wanna-bes) Lucasfilm goons, and many more! (writer's note: Actors, if you happen to read this, please don't hurt me! I've got about ten bucks, and that wouldn't cover all your legal suing fees)

The Jedi will come into effect the second chapter, but first I'm going to drag you through Amy's horrible day, just to get some background before the fun begins.

Oh, and to your suprise: THIS IS NOT A SABE/OBI FIC, NOR WILL ANY ROMANCE BESIDES THE INITAL "LET'S TORTURE AMIDOLEE AND GET HER BACK FOR TORTURING OTHER CHARACTERS" break-up scene with her (made-up) boyfriend character. Nothing dramatic in romance. AND NO ONE DIES!!!


So, here is the first post of the story. If you're all nice and good and respond, I'll try and hurrying through my imagined college life and bring in our two favorite Jedi!





?Ewan McGregor Meet Obi-Wan Kenobi?

Chapter One

Light.

It was coming in through the window.

. . .

What was ?light- doing? Waking her up? She was suppose to be awake and out the door BEFORE light invaded her bedroom.

Which meant . . .

SHE WAS LATE!!!

?Sithspawn!? Amy Kasten shrieked, eyes flying open as reality slammed into her. With the grace of an elephant on ice, Amy tumbled out of her messy twin-sized bed, stepping on a CD case, swearing from the sharp pain, and then bumping into the corner of her desk, knocking several disks to the floor.

The digital clock read 7:05, the green-glowing numbers greeting her with their usual candor.

Not only was she late for her first class, but it was practically over! What kind of professor started class at six a.m. anyway?

Why hadn?t her alarm gone off? Why hadn?t Heather woken her up? Heather was always awake by 6:45, her first class beginning at eight. What good was a roommate when they forgot to wake you up?

Dashing across her somewhat unkempt bedroom, Amy had no time to think of delicious punishments, or how to simply chew Heather out. Class would be over at eight, but by the time she had dressed, showered, and crossed campus to Fulton Hall, it would be at least a quarter till. Well, cancel the shower. They?d have to put up with her wonderful morning stink, and she wouldn?t be the first college student to show up in her pajamas. Professor Kay wouldn?t scold her, but simply look down his long nose and thick-rimmed specs, and stare for several eternal moments.

It was a price she would have to pay.

Without further delay, Amy grabbed her books, shoved her feet into her sandals, and raced out into the tiny living room/ kitchen of the apart she and Heather shared.

?What?s the rush, Ames??

Amy stopped dead in her tracks, spinning around to face the blonde girl sitting

 

ooh! this looks like it's going to be good... can't wait for MORE!

--Mr. P

 

Grin! Okay, I'll post again. I doubt I'll have posting rages in this story, but I know you'll want to get everything moving once I have everything in place. Just waiting for some info from JMMJ, but there's plenty to hold us by until then!




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Retreating to the pig-sty of a room, Amy started-up her laptop computer, and combed her dark-blonde hair into a sloppy ponytail.

?Good morning? the laptop greeted cheerfully.

?Ha. Sure.? Amy pulled her chair up to the cluttered desk and quickly logged-on. Already she could feel the anticipation course through her slightly sluggish veins. The JC was always a wonderful greeting to an already horrible day. ?I?m in the mood for some Obi-torture,? she murmured to herself, biting a nail as she quickly scanned the screen. Oh, good, some PM?s.

Vaguely, she was aware of the shower turning off, and the stereo was switching CD?s. She never heard Heather come out and rummage around the apartment, already responding to two Private Messages. Heather peaked in on her friend, shaking her head and rolling her eyes as Amy laughed at one of the messages. While both nineteen-year-old girls shared a love of Star Wars, Heather thought Amy was sometimes a little overboard. Sure, it was fun reading her stories, and the others on the JC, and making fun of Little Ani, but one had to wonder if Amy was just a bit fanatical.

The keys on the laptop?s keyboard clicked softly as Amy responded to the most recent PM. Yup, she was out of it. ?I?m leaving soon!? Heather called.

?See you next week,? Amy murmured, barely looking up. Heather chuckled to herself and left to finish packing.

 

BWAHAHAHAH!!!! I fell on the floor just reading the subjectline! *evil grin* Hmmm, I forsee this will be loads of fun!

 

Oops, forgot to note that this takes place in the summer of 2000, May. It's one year prior to the TPM galactic time-line.

 

Yay! 2! Okay, 2nite is the posting rage. Want to get through Chapter 1 and into the second (where our 2 favorite Jedi will make their debut to Earth). Here's some more.



About an hour later, Amy sat back in her chair, stretching her arms and cracking her knuckles. Well, she had read through her favorite threads, replied, PMed Lorena and MJ, and now she didn?t have anything delaying her from the evil, sithly novel.

//Maybe I should start a new story// Amy thought, looking thoughtfully at the screen. It had been a bit since she had last wrote a fic up on the board. Usually she couldn?t last two days without writing, but when majoring in English literature she had enough writing to do every day.

Yawning, her mind began to drift. Life was ironic. How on all of God?s green Earth had she wound up being a Star Wars fan? She?d hated it before, scoffed and laughed at those who?d been fans. It was a stupid, dorky, boys? movie. But then, she?d seen the trailers to Episode 1, and had thought it looked interesting. Thus, had begun the deep love for the galaxy far away, and her obsession with writing Star Wars fan-fiction.

The small ?ping- of the computer announced an instant message. Amy smiled when she saw the sender. Alex was awake from his night of partying. Her stomach gave a small, giddy twist. She and the junior had been dating for the past few months, and it had been wonderful. Best of all, he loved Star Wars as well. It would have been a real pity if he hadn?t, because she might not have been able to stand him otherwise.

__Morning, Ames. Thought you?d be awake__

__Of course. How was the frat party?__

__Usual idiots getting drunk. Anyway, what are you doing?__

__JC, what else?__

__Is that all your plans?__

__Have 2 go to the store. Bone dry__

__When? We?ll go 2gether. U r a girl, u know what to buy__

Amy laughed. __Haha. I?ll be ready in an hour__

?Thank you for yet another distraction,? Amy said happily. She had just enough time to get a shower, dress, and be out the door to meet Alex, whom lived in one of the dorms. Amy had never been one to procrastinate on a story (well, there was one exception), and now she was finally beginning to understand what many of the other authors had meant.


**

a trip to the grocery store. Romantic isn't it? ;-)

 

This should be a fun story to read. Looking forward to more!

 

LOL! *grin*

 

All right, last post of this chapter, then the Jedi will be coming in soon





?Lucky Charms or Cinnamon Toast?? Alex asked cheerfully as Amy wheeled the grocery cart down Aisle 3 of the local Hy-Vee.

Amy frowned for a moment, studying the two boxes of her favorite cereals for a moment. ?Both. They have coupons.?

?Any Honeycombs??

?Those, too.? Amy glanced at her watch, scowling. It was going on eleven. Half they day had gone by had she was getting nowhere in her story, and she couldn?t help but think back to the latest story by Jane Jinn. Man, Obi-Wan was going to get a dose of torture soon! She couldn?t wait. And she really should get back on her novel. There was no sense in wasting this perfect day-off. The Boss had been generous enough, letting her have a day of peace before she got back to work at Walden Book Stores. She?d be working full-time most of the summer, and she couldn?t hold the book off forever. It?d be nice to be able to launch her career from the beginning, without worrying about expenses.

Of course, that was if the book ever was finished and was ever any good.

? . . . hello? Coruscant to Amy!?

?Hmmm?? Amy snapped out of her daze, frowning at Alex?s exasperated face. ?oh, I?m sorry, Alex. I was thinking.?

?Why don?t we move on from cereals?? Alex smirked, on cheek dimpling as he pushed the cart into the next aisle, narrowly missing three kids arguing over macaroni and cheese. Amy trudged after him, the twenty minutes spent in the Hy-Vee was already putting her in a foul mood. Suddenly, she was overwhelmed by the desire to race home and begin typing. Her block was lifting, and she had to seize the moment or it would be lost for another four weeks.

Alex was randomly pulling items of the shelves as he strolled by. Amy was pretty certain she was not in need of baking soda, and surely that spinach can didn?t belong there. ?Alex! Stop!? she called, hurrying down the aisle. Alex turned and smirked again, his dark eyes laughing and she suddenly remembered just how lucky she was. Alex was one of the top students, tall and with an athletic body, dark hair that curled gently, and he had a personally that most jocks didn?t. At least, not in Amy?s experience.

?We don?t need any of this,? Amy said, yanking several items out of the cart and shoving them in all the wrong places. She earned a look of stern disapproval from a blue-haired old lady near the applesauce.

Alex shrugged, shoving his hands in the pocket?s of his carpenter jeans. ?You?re the female. You know what to get.?

Muttering under her breath, she took the cart. ?Let?s hurry up, all right? The day?s wasting.?

It seemed that each precious minute she spent in the store was the demise of her writing career. Alex was trying to tell her about the party, which she had skipped out on, being so exhausted and not feeling well. His words barely registered, and she knew it was a funny story by the way his hands were exaggerating his voice, but somehow it faded as her mind took over.

It was her turn to randomly pull things off the shelf. Alex, being the dutiful boyfriend and smart enough not to point out Amy?s mistake, would retrieve the various items and placing them on any random shelf.

It was amazing that they ended up at the busy check-out with edible food.

?Your mind?s wandering,? Alex said after a moment.

?Hmm? Oh, yes. I?m sorry, Alex. You know how I get when it comes to my writing.? She caught the suppressed eye-roll, and tried to ignore it. She must be such a boring girlfriend, and she had told him several times that he was not obliged to put up with her.

Alex kissed her forehead. ?Yes, I do. How about we go and get some ice cream after this? You can tell me again about your story, and some witty thing you read on the board.?

?I?d really rather just go home and get to writing while I?m in the mood,? Amy said, cringing when Alex?s face fell. ?Maybe tomorrow??

?Sure, whatever,? Alex shrugged. The clerk began scanning their items, acting as if

 

yea!!Obi-torture! our favorite

 

Ohhh!!! Sounds interesting!!!

 

Chapter Two

It was these long hyperspace flights that bored Obi-Wan Kenobi to death. Well, not extreme death, more of a mildly dead state of mind. Either way, he had discovered that death lacked amusement.

It wouldn?t have been a long flight if they hadn?t had to bypass the entire Torlos sector of space to avoid waltzing into war space. The entire sector was engulfed in a war, which several other Jedi Knights were busy trying to mediate. It was a small sacrifice to save their lives, he knew, but at the moment, it was incredibly dire.

Skirting the Unknown Regions could be dangerous, and Obi-Wan didn?t have much confidence in the shuttle he and his Master, Qui-Gon Jinn, had acquired for their mission. He was good with mechanics, and especially design. The old Corellian shuttle was worthless, which was probably why the Republic could spare it. The engineers that had prepped the ancient ship had assured them it worked in good-order, and the navi-computer had been filtered of any bugs, which still resulted in no assurance for Obi-Wan.

The tall figure of Qui-Gon Jinn shifted slightly as he studied the computer consoles surrounding the pilot?s cabin. ?One minute, and then we have to enter real-space,? he said in a quiet voice.

Obi-Wan nodded, biting back a smart remark about how amazing it was they?d survived this long. Qui-Gon wasn?t in the mood for his Padawan?s ?optimism?. They?d have to re-enter the coordinates into the navi-computer, and then they?d finally be on their last leg of the journey.

When the time came, he was instantly alert, his silent sulking dashed away as he had something to attend to. The ship settled into real-space only a few minor shudders, and then Obi-Wan was busy trying to understand what the ancient computer was telling him. Qui-Gon fed him the coordinates.

Obi-Wan paused a moment. They seemed a little off, to what he had heard before. ?Are you sure they are correct, Master??

?The engineers had to translate the new code for the old computer,? Qui-Gon said with a slight smile. ?They are correct.?

?If the Republic is so well-off,? Obi-Wan murmured. ?Why can?t they afford some decent equipment? Hell, I?d fix it if they?d let me.?

?Padawan,? Qui-Gon warned in a stern voice.

?Yes, yes, I know.? Obi-Wan suppressed an eye-roll. He loved Qui-Gon more than anything, but there were times when he caught himself wishing his Knighthood would hurry up and get here. ?There,? he said when the computer was finished. ?All ready.?

?Good. Can?t wait to get off this stuffy ship,? Qui-Gon said, turning to the consoles.

?Patience, Master,? Obi-Wan said, his tone goading. ?A Jedi must have patience.?

The elder man shot the younger a sour look. Obi-Wan had become a bit more feisty lately, and he understood. Their missions hadn?t been particularly adventurous and important. A Jedi was not to crave these things, but Obi-Wan had been through one peril after another even before becoming Qui-Gon?s Padawan, and the sudden lull was causing the twenty-four year-old to become a bit restless.

Well, soon they?d be off this bucket of junk.

 

Holy sithspit! This looks to be hilarious!! I can totally relate to Amy as well...thinking about writing and obi-torture while in the grocery store! (we all do it, admit it!)

Cannot wait for more!!! And love the title, btw!

aa

 

Yay! Another fanfic to keep up with now. Anyway I can sympathize with Amy when her class starts at eight. My school starts at 8:20 meaning I have to be out of bed by 5:30 and on the bus by 6:30, life is cruel is it not?

Anyway I'm looking forward to more~

kithera

 

I luv this!!! What a cute idea! More soon pleeeeeeze!!!

 

Yay! I like this response! :-D
(I can't wait to do Obi-Wan's reaction to the movies!)



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Obi-Wan was dozing off when the ship shuddered. He was instantly on his feet, only to be tossed to the ground with another buck. ?Asteroids!? he gasped, realizing the situation in an instant. Qui-Gon was stepping over him, taking over the ship. The view screen flickered, showing a large asteroid field in their wake.

?Let me guess,? he grumbled, pulling himself to his feet. ?The wrong coordinates??

Qui-Gon sent him a quick glare, then steered the ship towards a slight clearing, diving and swooping as the engines whined in protest. Gritting his teeth, Obi-Wan tried to stabilize the drives, but one system was already beginning to fail. //Oh, thank you Republic!//

Both Jedi had grown used to the bucking of the ship. Obi-Wan watched as the shields weakened under the penetration of hard rock. They had all but failed when the small vessel cleared the field, gliding out into the blackness of space. With a shared sigh the Jedi exchanged bemused looks.

?Where do the Republic?s taxes go, Master?? Obi-Wan asked innocently.

?Status, padawan.?

?Shields are gone. Lost the hyperdrive, but we do have sublight. Oh, yes, look. We?re losing fuel.?

Qui-Gon grimaced, turning away. Obi-Wan almost sounded ?happy- about it! Or perhaps the usual sarcasm was lost on him now. Which ever, Obi-Wan was already scanning the system they had entered. A large one, nine planets orbiting a sun. A small, red planet was appearing in the viewport, another barely visible beyond.

?Any life forms?? Qui-Gon asked.

Obi-Wan frowned at the computer. ?An unlisted system, Master. Although, the third planet is inhabited. The technology isn?t advanced.?

?It?ll have to do. Can we make a short jump??

?Sublight at maximum, sure.? Obi-Wan?s smart remarks ceased as they concentrated on setting the dying ship for the inhabited planet. It didn?t take long, for the ship managed to hold together until they had entered the atmosphere. By then, just about everything had died. It was a free-fall into the atmosphere, and Qui-Gon felt like thanking Obi-Wan for his wonderful illustrations of their future, which was now present. Predicting the inevitable doom was never a pleasant company.

The ship?s hull began to burn, and Obi-Wan, in a grim voice, announced that the repulsorlifts had, in fact, died. The escape pods, however, seemed to be in working order. Perhaps they wouldn?t stay long, and what was the point of saving the damned vessel anyway?

?You?re right. Go. I?ll be right behind you,? Qui-Gon said, sweat pouring down his forehead as the cabin?s heat intensified.

Obi-Wan frowned. ?Master??

?Just go! Get it ready!?

?Pathetic lifeforms, pathetic ships,? Obi-Wan muttered as he went out the door. There were times when he really didn?t understand Qui-Gon. He could understand if Qui-Gon was trying to center the ship on it?s course, so perhaps they?d land somewhere nice and soft, but when a ship lost it?s steering capabilities, it was pretty hopeless. Then again, Qui-Gon particularly ?liked- hopeless causes.

There were two escape pods, barely large enough to fill two men. Obi-Wan accessed the first, quickly checking everything for malfunctions. It appeared to be in sound order, unlike it?s larger counterpart. It was hot and stuffy, so he immediately activated the atmospheric controls.

?Master!? Obi-Wan shouted as the ship shuddered again.

?I?m coming!? Qui-Gon entered the small hold. Obi-Wan moved from the hatch of the pod, ready for him to enter.

The ship bucked, and he was tossed hard against one of the walls. A sharp pain pierced his skull, and he squeezed his eyes shut against the acute pain. Then there was the sound of the hatch sealing. He was immediately aware of Qui-Gon?s presence on the other side. Seized by panic, he rushed for the hatch, ready to tear it open. He must have activated the jettison on accident.

Through the small portal, Obi-Wan could see Qui-Gon alre

 

Man, this concept has me grinning like an idiot! *grin, grin, grin*
More Amidolee!

 

YAY! You started it! And I finally got online after the computer being Sithly forevermore! Yayayay! =)

Amy so sounds like me. It's scary, it really is. Anyhoo, great job!!

 

JMMJ!!!!!!!!!! I've been lost without you! You better be PMing me soon! I have to know your plans for me to continue on what I'm working on a chapter ahead of what's posted. (I've been writing like mad!)

MJ, Amy's *me*! Great, Toga's practically my twin, and now so is JMMJ!

I'm starting feel a little exemplary!

 

HAHAHAHAHA!! I LOVE Obi-Wan's sarcasm! His attitude is just perfect! MORE MORE MORE!!!

aa

 

NOTICE: Calling all writers who know anything about X-Men and Star Wars (duh!)

The Force of Evolution is now becoming a round-robin. Please contact me if you would like to participate. Kit would like some help, because she is busy and can't do it on her own. Please consult me first, as I've got to explain a few things and get some organization.



Don't you just love cliff-hangars? There will be more tomorrow!

 

You're going to put me in the story somewhere, aren't you, Ami ;-)

There you go, having to be such a dunce with guys again! Maybe you should stop trying to be supportive and helping your friends with *theirs* ;-)

That's something Amidolee would do. Forget a date when the JC or a story is involved!

 

This storie is interesting,to say the least.
Write more soon!

 

Ohh... *claps hands excitedly* I just found this story! I LOVE it! It has so much potential, and is already GREAT!!!!
More please!!!

 

mmm... good! up! please, post more. this looks really, really good.

--Mr. P