Lit Books Comics A/V One Sentence or Less -- ANDOR (SEASON 1)

These entries are already serving as an illuminating experience for me. I'd heard Ascension read uncomfortably like Twilight in space, but damn.

 

I was thinking of making a Twilight comparison, but thought that was too harsh on the whole. There are scenes reminiscent of Twilight, but the EU is still better than that in general.

 

No...I'm pretty sure it's one entry per book.

 

No, two are allowed. We've covered this several times already.

 

Oh, my bad. Please continue.

 

It's one of those rules that's always been there, but is rarely used for whatever reason. Most probably figure it's better to just put out your best to avoid dividing likes, but I've got no problem with it if you feel you've got two really good ones.

 

"And, um, if I am made student council president, I will make sure we get TWO dances in the spring," said Rokari Kem, who was just SO CUTE AND CHARMING and subsequently got elected leader of the galaxy.

 

I would speculate that the readership dropped off with each successive novel.

 

While Daala still manages to make a mess of things, Vestara must decide whether to kill her father and love Ben, or kill her father and have a Sith heart.

 

An eerily familiar plot involving an inexperienced senator being elected to higher office.

 

I'd guess people stopped reading after even Conviction turned out bad (although I lost hope after Outcast). Anyway, hope what I'm referring to was in this book, I'm not going to go back and try to endure this book a second time.

Introducing the Interceptor-class Interdictor and the new TIE Destroyer, they sure put a lot of research into this book- wait, did Interdictors work that way in arranging asteroids?

 

Well, they had very powerful tractor beams, so I guess it is possible.

 

It's Hitherto Unsuspected Strategic Mastermind (Take Our Word For It) Day, as Abeloth and the Sith take over the Galactic Alliance (somehow...), Luke channels Iceheart and permits this to 'draw them out' (what's a few hundred trillion innocent citizens between eternal enemies?) and Daala and Jagged engage in a naval battle which, while presumably intended to depict two worthy heirs to Thrawn matching wits, lands a little closer to The Curse of Fatal Death.

 

And you get a like for the Who reference.

 

Isn't this the one where Ben Assaults Vestara in his bedroom, on his bed?

 

Nope, he barges into her room, because nothing will show a person how wonderful and life-affirming openness is like having it physically forced on you by an angry, paranoid teenager.

God, someone needs to make a rifftrax of this book; it's like there's something stupid every chapter. In the good ones.

 

Someone should do this:

(Foul Language)
For The Joiner King through Crucible.

 

Luke ravages Vestara's worldview to maker her join the Jedi and has the nerve to expect her to stick to that decision, Ben ravages Vestara's emotions to get himself a hot Sith girlfriend and has the nerve to expect her to stick with that decision, Abeloth ravages the last shred of common sense in the Senate to get elected ruler of whatever the Republic is these days and has the nerve to think the writers will stick to that decision, and the slavery-subplot ravages readers' good will and has the nerve to think they'll stick with this mess of a first draft that's purporting to be a coherent story.

 

Every Emperor ought to have a Hand,
every Emperor ought to have a bodyguard –
a loyal and not shoddy guard –
inspired by remorse

(oh, oh, won't it be delightful,
the Imperial Knights'll
be founded soon –
oh, oh, Denning's got the next book:
pop goes that
thought balloon),

every Emperor ought to have a Hand,
every Emperor ought to have a pet ninja –
blonde if you can't get ginger –
and sassy too of course,

detecting schemes and other threats,
inspecting her many regrets,
affecting Mara's sobriquets,
infecting Sondheim-writ quartets,
protecting Jagged with the Force!

 

Darish Vol appears and, for a brief, beautiful moment, this book is awesome.

 

Not much point to this since the thread will probably switch over to Apocalypse soon, but what the heck, my second entry-

Who is the more foolish, the Sith Tribe that invites an eldritch abomination to their homeworld or the galactic government that is taken over in less than two years by that same Sith Tribe?

 

I nominate Havac.

 

Havac, adopt a charming non-American accent and do that video for DNT-Crucible.

 

Todd the Jedi makes a comeback.

Just one more FOTJ book to go. Then I promise I'll try something that's less likely to inspire nothing but snark






If you've been holding it all in, now's your chance. I want to see this thread burn.