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Yoda's Psychic Hotline

Discussion in 'Archive: Ft. Lauderdale, FL' started by AxtonTredway, May 6, 2002.

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  1. AxtonTredway

    AxtonTredway Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    May 30, 2001
    It's not a fan film like the "Darth Vader's Psychic Hotline" I found on the Nashville board. (It looks great, guys! :) )...Yoda's psychic hotline is a farce thread dedicated to ease the fears of jedi and force adepts alike...And we all know what fear leads to, after all....(Greedo shooting first in the remake of episode IV) :)
     
  2. AxtonTredway

    AxtonTredway Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    May 30, 2001
    Producer: "Our first caller comes to us from the Outer Rim Territories. Go ahead, Luke."

    Luke: Yeah, hi. I'm a first time caller and I'm kind of embarassed.

    Yoda: "Embarassed be not. Fear embarassment is. Fears leads to anger...Anger leads to hate...hate leads to suffering!"

    Luke: "Yea, ok...well..I'll try to explain it like this....

    Yoda: (interrupts) Try not!...Do!...or Do Not!...There is no try!"

    Luke: "Yea, like I was saying...I met this girl on a hologram recording...and I thought she was really hot and all...then...then...."

    Yoda: "I sense much fear in you..."

    Luke: "Actually, I'm just kinda' grossed out 'cause I found out she was my long lost sister!

    Obi Wan: (glimmers in) "Your feelings do you credit,Luke, but they can be used to serve the emperor."

    Yoda: "I'm am touching this one with my gimmer stick not!....caller next!"


    -Axton Tredway
     
  3. AxtonTredway

    AxtonTredway Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    May 30, 2001
    Producer: "Our next caller is a fan from another galaxy...go ahead, Sean."

    Sean: "Hi, I'm a first-time caller and a big fan of Yoda's exploits!...Loved you in the Clone Wars!

    Yoda: "Wars do not make one great!"

    Sean: "Yeah, I know that speech. Thanks. Forget "move object" where I'm concerned...I can't even make the water dimple when I pee!"

    Yoda: "Size matters not! Judge me by my size!"

    Sean: "I think we're on the wrong conversation...I wasn't referring to.."

    Yoda: "And well you shouldn't for the force is my ally"

    Sean: "Sounds like you have "other" size-related issues, dude. Anyway, I always wondered what you and Luke did for toilet paper on Dagobah, without paper milling facilities and all...(My friends in Atlanta relate to the paper mill thing, since you can smell them all over Georgia!)

    "I mean I've heard of "mind wipe" in my rpg...but force wipe"? How did you have any energy left to lift that X-Wing?"

    Yoda: "Mysterious the dark side is....always there is a 'master' and an 'apprentice'"

    Sean: "I now see how Luke paid for his training!"

    Yoda: "Lunch time! Good food, come!?"

    Sean: "I'm not eating anything 'till everybody washes their hands!"

    Yoda: "You will not grow so big eating such little food....caller next!"

    -Axe
     
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