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  1. In Memory of LAJ_FETT: Please share your remembrances and condolences HERE

Beyond - Legends Circumventing Calamity! Dare Challenge--from TrakNar.

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by WarmNyota_SweetAyesha, Sep 21, 2014.

  1. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Chosen One star 8

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2004
    Circumventing Calamity! by Nyota's Heart Characters: J/TK, Jaina, Raynar.

    Disclaimer: Borrowing the characters for fun and a challenge.

    ~~~~~!!!!!!


    Dare Received From: TrakNar

    I dare someone to write a complete story in 666 words. Not a vignette. Not a scene. A complete story. The word count must be exactly 666 words.
    I could care less what the story is about, who is in the story, when it takes place, where it takes place, etc. I don't care. The only stipulation is that it must be exactly 666 words.





    It was a cold and desolate place. Clouds scudded across the lowering sky not even letting a modest amount of daylight through.

    There was an eerie silence … Until …

    Suddenly, a low rumble pierced the complete quiet.

    Jacen Solo looked up as a Lambda-class shuttle dove through the cloudbank.

    Child’s play for a Force user, he thought with gladness, knowing his twin was at the nav controls.

    The ramp lowered and he climbed aboard, and it whirred shut behind him, and the shuttle lifted off.

    “Raynar didn’t find any underhanded piratical movement.” Tenel Ka informed him giving him a hug in greeting.

    “Neither did I. But those rumors and Intel tips had to have some truth behind them…” Jacen observed as they moved to the cockpit.

    Raynar, seated in the pilot’s seat, growned, hearing Jacen’s comment.

    “Unless it was a wild hawkbat chase.” He said dourly.

    “Getting us off the actual track of unwanted and illegal activity.” Jaina added. “I have to admit the same thought occurred to me.”

    “Someone wants to divide our attention.” Jacen said, with a scowl. “Who, and why?”

    ~~!!

    When they returned to Ossus, more clues surfaced. It appeared that an offshoot of Black Sun, known as the Purple Quasars, were wanting to start slave trafficking. This information was uncovered by Jysella and Valin, Lowbacca, and Saba Sebatyne.

    Danni Quee was their point of contact. She was putting her scientific skills to work in decryption and Galactic Security now.

    When Tenel Ka heard this, she felt a pang. There’d been a brief almost-romance between Jacen and Danni. It hadn’t picked up after the cessation of hostilities … but neither had Jacen warmed up to her as anything more than a friend/past Academy mate.

    She wanted to know if Jacen was still bent on going on that “grand quest” of his.

    “Let me meditate on it.” He told her, in all seriousness.

    He really did feel like he needed to take any next steps after long and careful consideration, not tear off impulsively.

    ~~~~~!!!

    “I hope Jacen makes a prudent decision.” Tenel Ka confided in Jaina.

    “I cannot begin to tell you what he might choose to do.” Jaina said, a frown creasing her brow. “I used to know Jacen inside out, almost as well as I knew myself. Now, there are times he seems like himself and other times he feels different somehow. I feel like I have to reach across a deep chasm just to connect.” Her tone was sad.

    “It’d be strange if he weren’t changed drastically by what he experienced during his captivity.” Tenel Ka answered. “I guess I hoped, that with time, some of the worst would fade or be healed …? If that’s the word I’m looking for …”

    Jaina sighed. “Force if I know.”

    ~~!!

    Visions swirled and coalesced: of battles between he and Jaina, which was extremely shocking and disturbing; of strange and esoteric teachings; of deceptions and secrets leading to schisms within the family; of horrific sacrifices and losses on a cosmic scale …

    The Force was like a river, converging and breaking off from a single estuary. As he traced back to the source, as a swimmer back to the river’s head, he found that it began with his ill-fated quest for arcane knowledge. Obviously, some things were better left untapped.

    Jacen released the Force currents and gathered his scattered wits and composure.

    One of the deepest-buried secrets eventually had to do with Tenel Ka. He decided then and there that the best way to circumvent that disaster was to bring his and her relationship out into the open as they explored just what they could mean to one another apart from close friends.

    The Hapan consortium was a knotty tangle, but he found he just might welcome that particular challenge, if Tenel Ka were willing.

    Jacen found Tenel Ka concluding her own period of reflection in a secluded copse.
    As it happened, they were ready to move ahead on a single path, together.
     
  2. JadeLotus

    JadeLotus Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Mar 27, 2005
    Well done for condensing an entire story into 666 words! =D=

    I particularly liked this, very well written and I'm glad Jacen made the right choice this time!
     
    Nyota's Heart likes this.
  3. mavjade

    mavjade Former Manager star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Sep 10, 2005
    Great job with a difficult dare!

    Jacen would be in for a crazy time with the Hapens, but it would have been so much happier if he'd have chosen Tenel Ka over power.

    I loved this part! Great visual representation of the Force!


    =D=
     
    Gemma and Nyota's Heart like this.
  4. Findswoman

    Findswoman Fanfic and Pancakes and Waffles Mod (in Pink) star 5 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Feb 27, 2014
    Yep, it really is 666 words! (Though when I first punched it into my version of Word, it counted the "~~!!" separators too and gave me 669, but those aren't words so they don't count. ;) )

    Great job with this challenge, Ny, and I too am glad Jacen made the right decision here; arcane knowledge only counts for so much at the end of the day. Kudos for getting in the word "estuary" (which puts me in mind of my time in Oakland, CA and Hamburg, Germany; I'm now imagining the Force looking like the San Francisco Bay or the Elbe River. :D ).
     
  5. earlybird-obi-wan

    earlybird-obi-wan Chosen One star 6

    Registered:
    Aug 21, 2006
    great job on a difficult dare and with showing Jacen as the nice guy
     
    Nyota's Heart likes this.
  6. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Chosen One star 8

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2004
    Inspired by sensible Jacen in "Second Chance" and "Danni's Quest". :cool: I loved turning the Force into a tangible visualizable metaphor :D
     
    SiouxFan likes this.
  7. Gemma

    Gemma Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Dec 25, 2013
    Very well written and I like Jacen wanting to bring his relationship with Tenal Ka out in the open -- I always wondered how that would have worked for him in the pro fics.
     
    Nyota's Heart likes this.
  8. SiouxFan

    SiouxFan Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Mar 6, 2012

    I'm not sure why, but I liked this phrase above all else...that both J/TK's relationship and Hapes could be fixed if they just tried. Good stuff...and to be able to do it 666 words is particularly impressive! Long live 'sensible' Jacen! ;)
     
    Nyota's Heart likes this.
  9. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Chosen One star 8

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2004
    Hi! [face_dancing] Thanks bunches. @};- Lots of unnecessary heartache avoided and much happiness gained by being sensible LOL ;)
     
  10. Chyntuck

    Chyntuck Force Ghost star 5

    Registered:
    Jul 11, 2014
    I finally got around to reading this. It's an excellent response to an excellent dare. You didn't waste a word!

    Also, this kind of AU reconciles me with this era. One important reason I dropped out of EU literature after a while was all the Jacen-turning-to-the-Dark-Side thing. I found the pattern was really getting old, and you did a great job at turning it around - in just 666 words :)
     
  11. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Chosen One star 8

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2004
    Thanks bunches Chyntuck. LOL Moronic Jacen worked my nerve too. :rolleyes: Like he couldn't learn from not so ancient history? :eek: I loved averting a disaster and the challenge of the word count :)