Saga Turn Your Face to the Sun (DDC 2015: Obi-Wan) COMPLETE, and please vote for your fave DD2015 fic!

Tags: @serendipityaey @Findswoman

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Dear Qui-Gon,

I find time passes very slowly on Tatooine. I’ve only been here six months, and it already feels like six years. The days are long and bright, and I can feel my skin begin to weather under the twin suns. There is little to occupy my days, and I content myself with meditation, talking to you or communicating with Yoda. Occasionally I go into town to get supplies, but I do not want my face to be too well known.

Every morning Rooh and I make the journey through the Wastes and across the Dune Sea to the Lars homestead. I always make sure to arrive after Owen is up on the ridges tending to the vaporators, and Beru is in the home going about her daily chores. I sit with Luke and let her work, the brief time enough to content myself that the boy is safe, loved and well cared for.

Today he was asleep when I got there, and I held him in my arms, marveling at the wispy blond hair, the features which are so familiar to me. His expressions are much like Anakin’s, although sometimes I see dear Padmé as well, when the boy smiles.

He is not a calm sleeper, constantly wiggling and shifting in my arms as if always striving for a more comfortable position. And yet he sleeps soundly, his movements instinctive. Beru was particularly talkative today, and I discovered that Luke had been unsettled the previous night and wouldn’t stop crying. This is not unusual for a child his age, Beru told me, but when Luke’s cries reached their zenith the power in the room went out.

“Owen is convinced it was a generator glitch,” Beru said, wringing her hands. “But…you said that Luke has the same powers that you and Anakin have."

“Yes,” I replied, and I could see she suspected that Luke’s distress triggered the lighting malfunction. A sound assumption. “He is very strong in the Force,” I told her.

“And you can’t...take it away?”

“No – I’m sorry.” I truly was, because I could see her distress. In her eyes, Luke’s Force potential was a danger to him – it made discovery far more likely, especially if his emotions were having physical consequences. “When he’s older, he can learn how to control it.”

Beru did not seem comforted. “And what will stop him from falling to the…dark side...like his father?”

“The proper training,” I told her. “Discipline and self-control.”

“Was Anakin not properly trained?”

Her words struck me. “No,” I said after a long silence. “He wasn’t.” Looking back, I see only my mistakes with Anakin – my indulgence. I loved him, but I’m not sure I ever really understood him. I certainly didn’t give him what he needed.

“But you think you can train Luke?” Beru asked, and the tone of her voice was a trifle sharp. I do not blame her, for what assurances are there that I would not make the same mistakes as I did with Anakin?

“Yes,” I told her, with as much conviction as I could muster. What other choice was there? And besides, I have learnt from my mistakes. I hope.

“And what would you want of him, if he is trained?” Beru pressed when I did not answer.

“The Empire cannot stand forever,” I said. “It may take years, but I believe that good will prevail.”

“So you want to make him a Jedi,” Beru turned her face away. “A soldier.”

“Perhaps.” In truth I am still undecided.

“You had thousands of Jedi,” Beru pointed out, “and they were not enough to stop the Empire rising.”

“We were betrayed,” I said, a bitter twist in my heart. “And unprepared. This time we won’t be.” I looked down at little Luke, still asleep, his tiny hand curled around one of my fingers. Luke is not his father, I remind myself; he radiates pure light.

“Luke is just one,” Beru told me, stepping forward to lightly brush the boy’s hair back. “What difference can he possibly make?”

Of course, Luke is not just one – I think of Leia on Alderaan in the care of Bail Organa. He is unlikely having the same dilemma that I am. He is without the Force, and so will be raising Leia as Queen Breha’s heir as he would have done his own blood daughter. I doubt he has given much thought to her Jedi potential – but then I suppose neither have Yoda or I.

Luke awoke in my arms then, his chubby cheeks prominent as he cracked a wide smile, his eyes a brilliant blue as they bored into mine. He wiggled and I lifted him upright, securing my grip under his arms and letting him kick his feet down towards my lap, trying to stand.

“Hello, little one,” I said softly, and was rewarding with a babbling laugh.

The tension in Beru’s shoulders seemed to ease, and she smiled as any indulgent mother would. “He likes you,” she said. “That’s why I let you visit.”

I thanked her heartedly, since I knew my contact with Luke was entirely dependent on Beru’s goodwill. And although the circumstances are not what I would like them to be, I remind myself that Luke is thriving under their care.

“Ba-ba,” Luke said, a cheeky grin on his face as a sliver of drool ran down his chin. Beru laughed and wiped off the spittle with a cloth.

“You see,” she said, as if being salivated on was a mark of approval. But I didn’t mind, and engaged in some more embarrassing cooing with the boy as he kicked his legs and laughed. He’s strong, always moving and unable to sit still – I remember Anakin was much the same as a child. At the end of my rope, I once asked Mace for some advice in teaching Anakin to sit through a meditation session without his usual fidgeting, huffing and exclamations of boredom. Mace suggested that every time Anakin broke concentration, we start the meditation all over again, and eventually the boy would learn patience.

Suffice to say I gave up after eighteen hours. I don’t think Anakin ever actually mastered that skill, in the end.

I suppose this was reflective of his life here on Tatooine, before his training. He was a slave, a commodity, and therefore every moment he was not doing something useful was a moment wasted, a moment when he was not performing as expected. I did not see this clearly until now, did not understand how profoundly his early hardship affected him.

Does he meditate now? Is he even able to in that suit that sustains him? It must require intense concentration to even keep himself alive, and I wonder if that occupies him enough. There is scant news of him on the holonet; he is a specter, a bogeyman, where once he was the holonet prince, the galaxy’s greatest hero. How far he has fallen.

How far we’ve all fallen.

Obi-Wan Kenobi

 

Wonderful talk between Obi-Wan and Beru, full of natural questions and reflections on the future. And baby! Luke is just the topping, the sweet yummy frosting LOL

 

Good entry - I liked how Beru and Ben have common interests in Luke and how they can reason together about his welfare, whereas Owen is all protective bull-moose.

 

Like the conversations between Beru and Obi-Wan. And the thoughts about Anakin meditating are touching

 

THIS. Reminds me so much of my childhood and my sister's "time outs".

Great update. I'm glad to see that Obi-wan gets to visit Luke, for now at least. Baby Luke is just a joy to read.

That ending - very poignant.

 

I can completely understand Beru's apprehensions that Luke will be "enlisted" into the service of the Jedi. Why would she ever want that, seeing how brutally the Jedi have been massacred? She (and Obi-Wan) have no other frame of reference for what a Jedi is or could be. Obi -Wan assumes that Luke will be trained and serve the way that Jedi have always been trained and have served. It makes me wonder if the decision to hide the Jedi background (and, apparently, any information about the Jedi and even of the Force) from Luke as he was growing up was as much Beru's decision as Owen's.

There is scant news of him on the holonet; he is a specter, a bogeyman, where once he was the holonet prince, the galaxy’s greatest hero. How far he has fallen.

This is worse than death. Anakin has gone from beloved hero to a phantom specter, a ragged echo of the charm and strength that he once took for granted.

Another gorgeous entry.

 

This chapter was great! Love Luke and Obi-Wan's interactions!

 

I've finally had a chance to catch up on this. Well done! I hear Obi-Wan's voice in my head as I read these. I love that he is writing to Qui-Gon, and in that, sorting out what this time of exile and hiding means for him and for Luke. I particularly like his interactions with Beru and baby Luke, and the understanding that he comes to with Owen. Please add me to the tag list.

 

I caught up on your latest three entries and I can say right now that, of all the fics by you I read, this one is going to be my favourite. Like K'tai I can hear Obi-Wan's voice in my head as I read. Your characterization is beyond perfect -- I loved how you inserted the "certain point of view" in this story and the description of the Jedi Purge was heart-breaking. I also very, very much enjoyed your characterization of Owen and Beru Lars through Obi-Wan's eyes.

This may have been asked in the comments before, but how much are you relying on the novel Kenobi for this? I have it on my list of things to read but I didn't get around to it yet.

 

I like your self-reflective Obi-Wan better than the smug, old man from the OT movies.

 

Thank you! Obi-Wan is naturally reserved, and Beru has a sweet disposition so I'd think they'd get on well even if they don't agree on how to raise Lue.

Thanks! Obi-Wan isn't an obvious candidate for baby care, but he tries his best and has a natural affection for Luke, so Beru is glad to have him around. Owen's often busy keeping the farm afloat so it would get lonely for her and she likes having someone adult to talk to!

It's basically the Jedi version of the "naughty chair" - the time out starts all over again if they get out of it But patience was never one of Anakin's strengths...

It would have to, I think, with Anakin expending all his energy and raw connection to the Force just trying to keep his body alive and not reject the machinery of his suit. I don't think a Jedi of less power and ability would have been able to do it, but the hyperbaric chamber in my view would likely be necessary for Anakin to try and meditate or reach out to the Force properly.

True - Owen believes that showing love is working hard and protecting someone with no need to verbalise it, but Beru is naturally more affectionate - as is Obi-Wan although he'd got a lot of guilt mixed in. Thanks for reading!

Thank you!

Thanks! Obi-Wan's in a pretty bad place, but baby!Luke always cheers him up. Of course he knows daily visits won't be able to continue when Luke gets older.

I think so - especially because the only interaction Beru has had with Jedi were when Anakin and Padme visited (and of course Anakin was all rage-y) and now Obi-Wan who talks of Luke's power and destiny, so naturally that's going to give her pause when she only wants to keep Luke safe. But Obi-Wan's never known any different, and the decision has been taken out of his hands.

Thank you! As time goes on, the more affecting I find Anakin's tragedy, and Obi-Wan's as well.

Thank you!

Thanks! Obi-Wan's life on Tatooine is such a lonely one, and it helps him to reach out to Qui-Gon even if its just words on paper. He's actually one of my favourite characters to get inside his head, so I'm glad that his voice comes across!

Thank you! I've binge-watched the Clone Wars recently and Obi-Wan has such a distinctive voice, I'm happy it seems I can emulate it!

There are a few references from the novel - the eopie Rooh, Annileen and her daughter - as well as a bit of Obi-Wan's characterisation. It's a great novel, I highly recommend it!

Thanks! He had nineteen years of hard living to get to that point, so here he's less set in his ways and more hopeful.

 

Tags: @serendipityaey @Findswoman K'Tai qel Letta-Tanku

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____

Dear Qui-Gon,

I felt Shaak Ti die today. I do not know the circumstances, but I felt a sharp pain which has become so familiar to me; like the tearing of my soul. I do not mind the pain so much, it is the nothingness that follows which is the hardest to deal with, for I know that the beautiful space occupied by Shaak in the Force is now gone forever. I hope she has been able to find her way to wherever you are, Qui-Gon, I hope that her spirit and strength are still part of the galaxy somehow, and they were not truly lost.

I hope it was quick for her.

Yoda and I are the only members of the Jedi Council left now. I did not try and communicate with him today, for I know he would have felt her death even more keenly that I.

Was it clones that killed her? The same clones she supervised on Kamino? Shaak was a fair, just and insightful woman, and she gave opportunities to those who others would have discarded and dismissed. Have those men she instructed now turned against her, forgotten her kind and encouraging words, and repaid her tutelage with death? I sometimes think about Cody, so affably handing me my lightsaber on Utapau only minutes before trying to kill me.

Had they served the Emperor the whole time, feigning camaraderie with the Jedi until they received the signal to strike? Or perhaps they been programmed too well by their Kamino creators, following any order received from the Chancellor without question. Did they feel sorrow at our massacre – do they wonder if they should have made a different choice? I suppose I will never know, and yet I remember soldiers with heart and determination and loyalty, and I cannot believe their respect and friendship was a deliberate falsehood. Perhaps that is only what I want to believe.

Luke is growing well, and I find I seek him out in these dark moments. There is a comforting banality to the Lars’ home and their simple existence which could never be found within the Jedi Order. For the Lars’, the goal of each and every day is simply to get to the next one – to ensure there is enough moisture harvested from the vaporators, to check the perimeter and ensure no Tuskens have breached the farm, to keep little Luke fed, clothed and alive.

And yet I am enjoying these simplicities, and Beru is trusting me more with Luke every day. When I first began visiting she would never leave the room, always watching how I held him, what I said to him, the toys I gave him. Now she happily about her daily chores, checking on the droids, placing a comm call to her sister in Anchorhead. Beru is never still, as if she needs to keep active or the home will fall in around her. Even when I persuade her to sit and take tea with me, I see her watching the chrono as if going over her itinerary for the rest of the day in her mind.

I flatter myself that my assistance in looking after Luke has made her life somewhat easier – and console myself that my presence is all I can offer. I wish I had access to funds so I could assist the couple with their bills or improve security on the farm. I am concerned that Jabba the Hutt or one of his minions may come sniffing around the place if it is not properly secure. But I have spent most of the scant New Republic credits I had, and of course have no access to the new Imperial credits. It occurs to me that I should find some kind of employment when my funds inevitably run out, but that is a problem for another day.

Today’s problem was in the form of Owen Lars. He came home early from his toil up on the ridge, and there I was holding his nephew and enticing him to play with a small rattle. Owen shot me a distasteful look, but otherwise did not seem surprised to see me. Beru came back then, touching Owen’s arm lightly as if to calm him. He sat down at the table while Beru prepared his lunch and did not even look at me.

Beru did, when she sat down with her own plate. I realised that while I thought I had been so skillful and clever in evading Owen, he had known I was visiting the whole time. Of course Beru had told him, I realise now; she is not the kind of woman to keep such secrets from her husband. Somehow, she had convinced Owen to allow my presence, or at least pretend that he wasn’t aware of it. I appreciate her all the more - she is a true and fair ally.

I happily turned my attention back to Luke, who was unusually quiet and still. I wonder if he felt my distress and grief, for he stared at me with bright blue eyes for some time. Then he put his little hand on my chin, and I do not know if it was Luke’s unconscious Force powers, or simply my instinctive reaction to an infant, but I felt my sorrows lift away.

The boy is well named, for he is indeed pure light. He shines so brightly that I am simultaneously filled with happiness and anxiety. I do not want the Emperor – or worse, Vader – to somehow feel his presence. I had thought the dampened Force of Tatooine may assist but Luke grows brighter every day. I know that soon I must talk to Owen and Beru about teaching Luke, if only to control and conceal his power, to keep him safe.
I could not save Anakin or my Jedi bretheran – I could not save Shaak Ti from meeting her terrible fate. But I can save Luke – I can protect his life and keep all harm from coming to him.

That is my life’s goal, and I intend to fulfill it.


Obi-Wan Kenobi

 

How heart-wrenchingly poignant about Shaak Ti. LOL on Beru's busy activity and her silent and subtle cooperation with Kenobi to have him visit and I am happy she is more comfortable with him being alone with Luke. Luke being "pure light" - a gorgeous description!

 

Aw, Shaak Ti.

Oh, Owen. I like that he didn't make Obi-Wan leave, at least! He's a hard man, but he's fair.

 

Thank you! Luke was well named and Beru is starting to like having Obi-Wan around, really, not only for the assistance but for the company.

Owen's tough, but a fair man I think, and he sees that for now Obi-Wan is helping out with Luke. Thanks for reading!

___________________________________________________________________

Tags: @serendipityaey @Findswoman @K'Tai qel Letta-Tanku

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Dear Qui-Gon,

I chanced a visit to Mos Eisley today, since my vaporator is once again on the fritz and they didn’t have the spare parts in Anchorhead. You will be shocked to learn that I have become quite the mechanic, and this time I did not require the assistance of Owen Lars to discern the problem.

I remember you telling me the old Jedi wisdom; “Trust in the Force, and it will provide.” However, you were always quick to remind me that faith alone cannot fill one’s belly, and it is important to look to the Living Force for guidance, rather than providence.

The Force cannot fix one’s vaporator either it seems, and accordingly I’ve had to learn skills I never even dreamed I’d need. But even mastering the mechanics of a vaporator is not sufficient when the binary brain burns out, and I must return to civilization for spare parts.

If one could consider Mos Eisley civilization, since even the worst scum streets of Coruscant would seem refined next to this spaceport which serves as a haven for bounty hunters, smugglers and thieves. And yet it seems I am one of them now, just another criminal hoping not to be caught or recognized.

I see the influence of the Hutts in Mos Eisley far more keenly than in Anchorhead – their slimy presence is everywhere, although I have yet to actually see one. Poverty is rife and slavery rampant, and for the first time I get a glimpse of what Anakin’s life must have been like as a boy, in fear of the powerful crime families that controlled everything. The grip of the Empire is loose here, and I suspect that it will remain so whilst the Hutts do not interfere with their galactic rule.

So it was under the Republic, and I always thought such concessions were necessary to keep a democracy alive. But now I wonder…the Republic outlawed slavery in the Senate and yet treated with the Hutts all the while knowing their vile deeds and nature. How do we justify acts performed to serve the greater good if they were purchased with the suffering of the innocent?

I recall myself, Anakin and Ahsoka working to rescue Jabba’s son from the Separatists, so that the Republic might have access to the trade routes of Hutt Space. I stood before Jabba, and chose not to see the Twi’lek dancer chained to his throne, although her lifeless eyes no doubt saw me. Once she may have dreamed of a Jedi rescuer, but perhaps many had come and gone, ignoring her as I did. Hindsight brings shame as well as clarity.

I recall Ahsoka questioning Anakin later about the mission – the poor child had no idea of his history – and he’d brushed her off with a flippant response. Was that when he’d begun to lose faith in the Order? When we had sent him on a mission to assist those who had once enslaved him – asked him to save the son of a creature who had stolen so many other sons from their father’s arms?

And my dear Ahsoka…where are you now? Your abandonment of the Order has likely saved your life, and I am grateful for that. Do you mourn your old master as the rest of the galaxy does, or do you know, somehow can you sense that Anakin lives on in Vader?

But I remind myself that he does not – that any trace of Anakin has been obliterated by the dark lord who has taken up residence in his battered and burnt body. In Mos Eisley I sat in a bar for hours and watched the holonet – official addresses by the Emperor and Admiral Tarkin about the New Order, as it is called. Trade restrictions, military homogenization, and the introduction of regional governors to represent the Empire’s interests in populous systems. All in the name of security and peace.

Vader is the spectre behind such reports, and the hunt for the Jedi traitors is well publicized. I saw my own face on a bounty hunter’s callscreen, and can only hope my hood was low enough to conceal my identity. That is the biggest threat, that my presence here in Tatooine will be sold to agents of the Empire, and Vader himself will come to hunt me down as he has hunted so many others. It would lead him to wonder why I chose this planet, and Luke’s discovery would be almost certain.

I am resolved not to return to Mos Eisley unless absolutely necessary, or until time and these blasted double suns has sufficiently altered my appearance. There are too many villains there anxious to pounce, and I will not be the brush-mouse caught in a trap.

I just hope my vaporator doesn’t go bust again.


Obi-Wan Kenobi.

 

Superb musings on tough questions and the ethics of past choices! Hindsight brings shame as well as clarity. Wise and true words.

 

He's regretting the practicality of his former life as Jedi so maybe he is on the way to becoming more and more ascetic, as a monk would do. I pity him needing to learn all the ins and outs of being a mechanic, even though it gives a clue as to what Anakin's personality is like.

 

I apologize for not replying to the earlier post – I have no idea how I missed it! But it was sad and wistful and touching. I think Obi-Wan mentioned before that as hard the pain is for feeling the loss, the worse part is when the pain subsides because he knows he will never sense that person again.
Luke is truly the new hope. He can fill the darkness and emptiness with his light. What an instinctively perceptive being he is.

Obi-Wan sees that he was blind to the pain of others, not out of thoughtlessness or a lack of compassion, but because he simply failed to recognize it. I love how Obi-Wan is becoming someone new here, and it’s a good thing. He didn’t expect there to be life after the Order but there it is.

Excellent and thought provoking writing!

 

Wow, great entry! Findswoman is right, we've probably all seen little evils like this and chosen to ignore them at some point in our lives. Kudos to Obi-Wan for realizing his wrong.

 

And my dear Ahsoka…where are you now? Your abandonment of the Order has likely saved your life, and I am grateful for that. Do you mourn your old master as the rest of the galaxy does, or do you know, somehow can you sense that Anakin lives on in Vader?

But I remind myself that he does not – that any trace of Anakin has been obliterated by the dark lord who has taken up residence in his battered and burnt body. In Mos Eisley I sat in a bar for hours and watched the holonet – official addresses by the Emperor and Admiral Tarkin about the New Order, as it is called. Trade restrictions, military homogenization, and the introduction of regional governors to represent the Empire’s interests in populous systems. All in the name of security and peace.

I am sad that you cannot sense that a piece of Anakin still lives on in Darth Vader. If you would have only tried harder... sigh. But the past is the past. You keep an eye on the future: Luke! Who is indeed a light... of hope.

 

Thank you! Obi-Wan has always considered himself a civilised and moral person, but his experience on Tatooine is humbling as he's had the time to reflect.

I think his life on Tatooine brings him very close to Anakin, which causes him even more pain, because he's realising that while he loved Anakin, he perhaps never understood him. But now he's seeing for first time how harsh life is on Tatooine, and understanding why such a planet and childhood would produce a man like Anakin. Thanks for reading!

Thank you! Obi-Wan shifts between despair and hope, I think - happy, fulfilled and sure of his mission when he is with Luke - because what a cutie, and also his Force sense must be infectious. But when he is alone the weight of his loneliness and feeling the loss of his friends must be terrible for him.

It would be so hard for him - being a Jedi was his whole life and that was all he knew, even if sometimes it led him down paths where he lost sight, as all the order did, about what was important - the Jedi helping out Jabba in the Clone Wars movie always hit a false note with me. Now he has to adapt to a life where his one responsibility is keeping one boy safe as opposed to a whole galaxy - anyone I think would find it difficult to cope.

Ah, that must be it! Shame on me for being a copy-and-pasting lazy pants

I always liked Shaak Ti in the Clone Wars - I chose her because she was the last remaining member of the Council alive (after Yoda and Obi-Wan), and also the tragedy of perhaps being killed by clones she helped train. I haven't seen the last season of TCW yet, so kept her death a bit ambiguous since I understand it was vague and clashed with the Legends version anyway - so, guess, it's my own version!

Yes, although Anakin was from Mos Espa, I think Mos Eisley would have been even worse when it came to slavery and general scumminess - but Obi-Wan can do even less now than he could have in the past, because he has to keep a low profile for Luke's sake. I think actually experiencing the harshness of Tatooine life would really hit Obi-Wan and give him a deeper understanding of Anakin.

[/quote]And the passage about pretending not to see the Twi'lek dancer—wow, what a moment. All of us have had moments like that in our lives—though how many of us would be mensch enough to admit it, as Obi-Wan does so poignantly here?

Thanks so much for these thought-provoking entries, and I'll do my best not to miss the next one![/quote]


Thanks for the thoughtful review! The complexity of the Jedi's moral stance during the Clone Wars has always interested me in that they had to make moral sacrifices to serve the greater good, unaware that the end of it all had long been planned by Palpatine and they were unwittingly dancing to his tune the entire time.

There's a really good quote which is appropriate (by David Morrison) - "The standard you walk past is the standard you accept." Everyone during the war was willing to compromise because it seemed to be the only way to ensure victory and prevent galaxy-wide suffering, but they forgot or chose to ignore the individual suffering their actions were allowing to continue. It's a hard choice, and there are no easy answers.

Thank you! I think Tatooine is almost a spiritual experience for Obi-Wan, reconnecting with the core of being a Jedi - service to others without seeking reward. He's getting there.

Thanks for reading! Obi-Wan has given up on Vader, I think in part because he blames himself so much for Anakin's fall, that it is easier for him to compartmentalise and look to Luke who is indeed the future.

 

Tags: serendipityaey, Findswoman, K'Tai qel Letta-Tanku






I haven’t left my hut in three days. A perverse sense of melancholy has caught root in my heart, one I can’t quite seem to shake. I have not been to visit Luke, for I am conscious that I must not intrude too heavily on the Lars couple. Even if Owen has given his tacit permission, his opinion could change on a whim and I shan't press my luck.

Nor have I been to Anchorhead, subsisting on the ration bars and desert roots I have in my store, with Rooh providing me with eopie milk. Nothing gives me much pleasure, let alone food.

I cannot even bring myself to talk my morning walk through the red ridges of the wastes to observe the sunrise which I once found so beautiful. I do not know what is wrong with me, or how to claw my way out of his dark hole. I try to remind myself that Luke needs me, but then treacherous thoughts whisper that he is better left alone with Owen and Beru, without my interference. Look what I did to Anakin, after all.

Yoda has tried to contact me, and I feel my old Master’s presence and yet I fear if I speak to them they will know how far hope seems to have slipped through my grasp. We have progressed no further on forming a plan to combat the Empire, and in truth I fear all has been lost. What can two Jedi and two Force-strong infants do against the might of the Empire – against the Emperor who even Yoda could not best?

There is no joy to be found here, no satisfaction, no courage. All I see is despair and far and wide as the Dune sea – barren and devoid of life – and I cannot force a storm no matter how much I will it.

Rooh comes inside, squeezing her bulbous torso through my front door. She must sense my distress and has sought to comfort me, laying her snout on my lap and looking up at me with large sympathetic eyes. Or perhaps I am attributing sentience onto the creature because I am so lonely, and she is the only one who seems to care for my presence.

I wonder how much longer I can stand this.



Dear Qui-Gon,

I have nothing new to report.

Obi-Wan

 

Coward. There is no use hiding fear and frustration. It makes things worse.