Saga - ST Keeping Up with the Calrissians (humor, Lando, OCs)

Oh I can just picture this! The overzealous well-meaning neighbors -- in RL, it would be tuna surprise I'll bet. Something you like & do eat; but after getting 8 of them not so much.

 

Two things:

The first is

The second is that now I'm hungry.

I loved how each visitor was topping the previous one, with more Polla Noodles and an increasingly large number of extras, until Escouffer (chuckles at the name) turns up with the full shebang. And of course, how they all handle the holoshills differently, because there's nothing like an opportunity for free advertising, right?

And the Sullustan speeder mechanic... “By the Force, no, that’s disgusting! No, no, this is a good roasted Blood Grunt with chyntuck root. Oh, and a beebleberry pie.” That's just glorious.

It's a short review, but now I really need to get food, and there's no Polla Noodle Casserole in my fridge, which is kind of upsetting.

 

ARTWORK! (Testing 1-2-3)



Courtesy of @Chyntuck and @Mr Chyntuckopoulos, who are gifted geniuses! Anyone care to guess who's who? (Lando should be obvious, as should Tess).

 

Sorry to keep this on hiatus for so long... my spring resolution is at least four posts by May 1. I'm nowhere near where I intend this to be.

I hope everyone has had the chance to swoon over the amazing artwork from the brilliant Team Chyntuck. This was my prize for the Fan Fiction Awards last year, and we had so much fun picking out the different actresses to play the girls.

That is exactly what I had in mind! Whatever it is, it would be something that would keep well.

I've decided that roasted Blood Grunt is a popular Sullustan dish, usually enjoyed at holidays. I'm sure Jazz and her friends will be celebrating after Endor, if they can get their hands on any.

Now...
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This week on Keeping Up with the Calrissians… Val is suspicious

VAL: Daddy looks better. He’s eating what he’s supposed to, he’s taking his meds, he’s doing his exercises. Of course, he spends a lot of time in his office trying to get things running again, which is a little awkward, since I’m bunked down there. I guess I’ll have to go in with Azra. But I dunno… the people he’s talking to aren’t really business type people. The thing is…I think Daddy’s up to something.

Val took the call, and did a double take at the person on the other end of the comm. “Mama?”

Morning Albith, Val’s mother, smiled at her. “Good morning, my darling one. Or, I suppose it is afternoon there. Your father called me. I am returning his call. He is well?”

“Yes, Mama, there is great improvement. But…why did he call you?”

“I do not know. That is why I am returning his call.” Val eyed her mother. The older woman was still a beauty, with high cheekbones and a straight, pointed nose. Her eyes were black and calm, although her hair was cropped very close. The life of a bounty hunter was not an easy one, but her mother was still strong and lean.

Val pursed her lips. “You’ll tell me when you find out?” she demanded. Morning raised an eyebrow.

“If your father wishes you to know his business, he will tell you himself. If I think you should know my business, I will tell you. Now. Is your father at home? If he is not, transfer me to his private link and I will leave a message.

“He…he’s here. Hang on.” Val punched a code into the comm panel and went to the door of her father’s office. “Daddy? It’s Mama. She says she’s returning your call.”

She saw her father smile. There was a slightly feral twist to his smile that didn’t bode well for someone. “Excellent! I don’t want to be disturbed. Thanks, Tooka-kit!”

She closed the door and stood there, frowning at it. She could hear his voice, but she couldn’t make out any words. A note of pleased surprised, then lowered, business-like tones.

Azra found her there. “What are you doing?” she asked.

“Daddy has a comm. He’s talking to my mother,” she said. “She said she was returning his call.”

“Your mother? Why would he call her?” wondered Azra.

“An excellent question.”

“She’s…is she still a bounty hunter?”

“She is mostly retired, although I believe she takes the odd job, if the price is right. She acts as a broker, though, taking assignments and doling them out to others in exchange for a cut.”

Azra frowned. She and Val exchanged a long look. “What do you think the chances are that it is purely a social call?” Azra asked.

“Slim to none,” said Val. “He is up to something.”

Mel came up. “Is Daddy in his office? General Celchu is comming him, says he’s got some info that Daddy wanted.”

Val sighed. “He is talking to my mother,” she said. “He said he didn’t want to be disturbed.”

Azra snorted. “However…” she said. She touched the door control and walked boldly into the office. They just caught the last few words.

“…is looking on Nal Hutta, although it’s unlikely—“ Morning broke off. Lando frowned.

“I said I didn’t want to be disturbed,” he said.

“General Celchu is trying to reach you. He said he had some info that you wanted. What did you need from General Celchu?” said Azra, folding her arms. Lando hesitated, glancing at Morning and at Val and Mel, who were listening from the doorway.

“Oh, I just wanted to know if he could make Mel’s graduation party,” he said. “Patch him through.”

“Really? All that for an RSVP?” asked Val skeptically.

“Really? A party for me?” Mel was thrilled.

“We gotta celebrate your graduation, baby girl! It was gonna be a surprise, but I guess the tooka’s out of the bag. Put Tycho through and run along. I’m very busy.” He got up and nudged Azra back through the door, shutting it firmly behind him. They could see the seal mechanism flash red, indicating that he’d locked it.

Mel was alight with joy. “Really? We’re really having a party for me?”

“It looks that way,” said Azra. “We’d better get to work on the back yard, get it in shape. We can have it outside, we’ll be able to accommodate more guests.”

Mel was bouncing up and down. “Should it be formal? Or casual? Will there be a cake? Oo, driftlights! Can we have driftlights? What will I wear?” Happily she dashed off towards the kitchen to tell the others.

Azra and Val looked at each other again. Of course there would have to be a party for Mel, but Lando wouldn’t be talking to a retired bounty hunter or a retired Starfighter Corps officer with ties to the Intelligence branch to arrange it. Daddy was definitely up to something.

MEL: Daddy says we’ll have a party for my graduation! Woohoo! I guess it will make up for not being able to go to Beach Week with the Class! We still need money by the end of the month so we won’t lose the house, though. But, I get a party! Hope everyone likes Polla Noodle Casserole!

 

What a name for a bounty hunter "Morning" more like a holo-star. That conversation was all secretive and then followed by one with Tycho. Lando is definitely up to something Didn't take long did it?

Love Mel's happiness over her graduation party. Yuppers, certainly have found a use for all those frozen noodle suppers.

 

A-ha-ha!!! Lando!!! Of course he's up to something! He's up to no good, and this might be the one thing that could get Val and Azra to unite!

I am so happy that you found a way to bring Val's mother into this story. This post holds the promise of so many fantastic, hilarious and, dare I say, Hondo-esque developments that you really need to update more often.

And, meanwhile, Mel... "A party! Casual! Formal! Driftlights! Polla Noodles! Yay!" It's lucky she isn't the one keeping an eye on Dad!

 

Keeping up with my NY resolution to post on this more often...

Well, it IS Lando... Will the girls figure it out before he gets himself into trouble?

Quite true! And that's saying a lot!

Today's episode is based on a true story... and kudos to @DARTH_MU, who figured it out (you've had torties, hm?)
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This week on Keeping Up with the Calrissians…adventures in petsitting: Mrs. Kamba Returns!

MEL: Back to classes today…ugh. It was nice to see my friends again, but everyone is crazy stressed out getting ready for finals. If I don't pass, I don't get my degree and I'll be wasting the summer trying to make it up. And of course, Mrs. Kamba is home today, too. I don’t know how I’m going to tell her about Pom-Pom!

Mel was fidgeting on Mrs. Kamba’s couch. The old lady had said she’d be back by 1400 hours, and it was an hour and a half past that. Mel didn’t mind missing dinner (Ginni’s Roasted Blood Grunt hash was a brave but disgusting attempt to use up the original dish), but it was hard to concentrate on astrocalc with the eyes of a thousand fake torties on her.

The door slid open, letting some welcome cool air into the overheated house. “Mrs. Kamba?” asked Mel, standing up.

“Hello, dear!” said Mrs. Kamba, putting down her flight case. She looked around. “How did everything go?”

“Uh, pretty well,” said Mel, wondering how to explain what had happened to the beloved Pom-Pom. Mrs. Kamba looked at her plants, fingering the leaves.

“Oh, my, you’ve done a wonderful job,” she said happy. “They’re so green! The last time I came home, they were limp and going brown.” She walked into the room where the torties were. “Hello, my darlings, Mommy is home!” she sang.

“Uh, about Pom-Pom…” began Mel, steeling herself.

“Oh, there you are! Are you glad that Mommy’s home?” Mel walked up to stand beside Mrs. Kamba, staring in disbelief.

Pom-Pom’s scaly, striped head was poking out from under the broad flat rock in his bowl. He fixed a beady black eye on Mel, and then pushed himself out with his spade-like, clawed feet, maw gaping.

“Oh, you did miss Mommy!” cooed Mrs. Kamba, stroking his head with the tip of her finger. She took a look in the other bowls, softly talking to the other torties, who seemed oblivious to her presence. Mel could only stare. How the heck had that stupid creature managed to squeeze under that rock? She was sure it was impossible! And it couldn’t be her imagination that he was glaring at her, almost laughing at her.

MEL: Never again. Never, never again.

Mrs. Kamba rummaged in her purse. “Let’s see, we agreed on forty credits, didn’t we?” she said, counting four chits into Mel’s hand. “Oh, and here’s a little extra, for doing such a good job…” She tipped a few coins into Mel’s hand as well. A quarter credit. It wouldn’t even buy a candy bar.

“Thank you,” said Mel. “I trust your family is well? Your new great-grandaughter?”

MEL: That was a mistake. Seriously. TWO HOURS of holos of the new baby, who looks like a baby. Seriously. She had a red, squishy face, and she just lay there with her eyes closed as everyone passed her around. Cute yeah, but not two hours' worth of cute. *burying her face in her hands* Not for any amount of money, not if the fate of the Galaxy depended on it… I never want to see another wretched tortie as long as I live!

 

Love Mel's commentary on that sneaky tortie "glaring" at her and cheapskate Ms. Kamba -- not even a big enough extra for a candy bar and then yikes, having to look at pics of a sorta cute baby only to the family.

 

Even though my dad did not make it out of the hospital like Lando did, your story made me giggly and smiley. Thank you!

 

Pom-Pom the glaring tortie recluse! Mel may be ready for her astrocalc finals, but she sure needs to learn a few things about animals, avaricious old ladies and questions not to be asked. I can just picture her, squeezed on the couch by a gaga granny dropping more and more and more pics of the baby in her lap, and trying to find a way to stand up without dropping everything to the floor – all this, of course, with "the eyes of a thousand fake torties on her." Not a very Calrissian situation, if you ask me