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Topic:
humor - umor (general) :)
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SVAndrei
Title: Co-CR FF Romania
Registered:
Nov '04
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Date Posted:
1/7 10:09am
Subject:
RE: humor - umor (general) :)
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Anytime. I'm still battling with it, but i think i have it surrounded... Oh, wait, it got away...
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"What do you mean they blew up the Death Star?!"
Member of Fan Force Romania.
Cookie!
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sergiurusu
Title: former CR
FF Romania
Registered:
May '01
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Date Posted:
1/8 6:25am
Subject:
RE: humor - umor (general) :)
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Which one is the Blonde, and why? Care-i blonda si de ce? 
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"Collecting has the permanence of herpes, it mutates but doesn't go away" My collections: http://smg.photobucket.com/albums/v226/sergiurusu/ My music site: http://electrosound.ro/
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Chantal
Registered:
Jun '05
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Date Posted:
1/8 8:24am
Subject:
RE: humor - umor (general) :)
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Asta imi aduce aminte cand faceam scoala de soferi, si imi zicea instructorul "Facem la dreapta.... Cealalta stanga, draguta." 
-----signature-----
… We are such stuff
As dreams are made of, and our little life
Is rounded with a sleep.
(The Tempest, IV, 1, 17)
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sergiurusu
Title: former CR
FF Romania
Registered:
May '01
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Date Posted:
1/8 11:42pm
Subject:
RE: humor - umor (general) :)
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Chantal cred ca s-a prins. No one else? 
-----signature-----
"Collecting has the permanence of herpes, it mutates but doesn't go away" My collections: http://smg.photobucket.com/albums/v226/sergiurusu/ My music site: http://electrosound.ro/
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Ionut_cel_Intelept
Registered:
Mar '07
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Date Posted:
1/9 3:19am
Subject:
RE: humor - umor (general) :)
- Date Edited:
1/9 3:20am (1 edits total)
Edited By:
Ionut_cel_Intelept
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Ultima? Cea cu mana pe toc?
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sergiurusu
Title: former CR
FF Romania
Registered:
May '01
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Date Posted:
1/9 3:38am
Subject:
RE: humor - umor (general) :)
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Ionut_cel_Intelept posted:
Ultima? Cea cu mana pe toc?
Pana nu mai primesc cel putin un raspuns nu voi da rezultatul - rezultatul constand in poza ne-editata 
-----signature-----
"Collecting has the permanence of herpes, it mutates but doesn't go away" My collections: http://smg.photobucket.com/albums/v226/sergiurusu/ My music site: http://electrosound.ro/
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FriendlyPiranha
Title: Graphic artist
FF Romania
Registered:
Feb '05
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Date Posted:
1/9 5:04am
Subject:
RE: humor - umor (general) :)
- Date Edited:
1/9 5:05am (1 edits total)
Edited By:
FriendlyPiranha
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A 3-a, bineinteles. Doh...
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(¸.•* (¸.•*´¨`•.¸.•*´¨`•.¸.•*´¨`
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sergiurusu
Title: former CR
FF Romania
Registered:
May '01
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Date Posted:
1/9 7:24am
Subject:
RE: humor - umor (general) :)
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In sfarsit un raspuns clar. Ma asteptam de la baieti sa raspunda imediat dar se pare ca ei au de-a face doar cu brunete si roscate (sau deloc) - uitati-va la cracanele blondei sunt in contra-timp...
-----signature-----
"Collecting has the permanence of herpes, it mutates but doesn't go away" My collections: http://smg.photobucket.com/albums/v226/sergiurusu/ My music site: http://electrosound.ro/
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sergiurusu
Title: former CR
FF Romania
Registered:
May '01
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Date Posted:
1/11 7:22am
Subject:
RE: humor - umor (general) :)
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THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:
1) You believe in Santa Claus.
2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.
3) You are Santa Claus.
4) You look like Santa Claus.
-----signature-----
"Collecting has the permanence of herpes, it mutates but doesn't go away" My collections: http://smg.photobucket.com/albums/v226/sergiurusu/ My music site: http://electrosound.ro/
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Chantal
Registered:
Jun '05
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Date Posted:
1/30 7:06am
Subject:
RE: humor - umor (general) :)
- Date Edited:
3/4 1:55pm (1 edits total)
Edited By:
DVeditor
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Va mai amintiti de asta? Cu siguranta una dintre cele mai tari animatii flash de pe net, si acum rad de ma prapadesc cand o vad:
http://www.butiamletired.com/
WT*, mate?
Asta e cea mai tare replica.
-----signature-----
… We are such stuff
As dreams are made of, and our little life
Is rounded with a sleep.
(The Tempest, IV, 1, 17)
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sergiurusu
Title: former CR
FF Romania
Registered:
May '01
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Date Posted:
2/6 9:55pm
Subject:
RE: humor - umor (general) :)
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Care sint animalele preferate ale femeilor? Jaguarul in garaj, vulpea la gat, taurul in pat... si un bou sa-i plateasca facturile!
Un preot explica la ora de religie:
- Dumnezeu l-a creat pe Adam si cu o coasta din Adam a creat-o pe Eva.
- Pãrinte, il întrerupe un elev, tata spune ca ne tragem din maimute.
- Asculta, zise preotul plictisit, cazul familiei tale nu ma intereseazã. Eu vorbesc in general.
Care e diferenta dintre femeile cu varsta de 8, 18, 28, 38, 48 si 58 de ani:
8 - O duci in pat si apoi ii spui o poveste.
18 - Ii spui o poveste si apoi o duci in pat.
28 - Nu-i nevoie sa-i spui o poveste ca sa o duci in pat.
38 - Ea iti spune o poveste si te duce in pat.
48 - Tu ii spui o poveste ca sa eviti sa te duci in pat.
58 - Stai in pat toata ziua ca sa nu-i asculti povestea
-----signature-----
"Collecting has the permanence of herpes, it mutates but doesn't go away" My collections: http://smg.photobucket.com/albums/v226/sergiurusu/ My music site: http://electrosound.ro/
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sergiurusu
Title: former CR
FF Romania
Registered:
May '01
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Date Posted:
2/21 7:15am
Subject:
RE: humor - umor (general) :)
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http://producten.hema.nl/
-----signature-----
"Collecting has the permanence of herpes, it mutates but doesn't go away" My collections: http://smg.photobucket.com/albums/v226/sergiurusu/ My music site: http://electrosound.ro/
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ROGUESQUAD
Registered:
Oct '04
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Date Posted:
3/9 1:21am
Subject:
RE: humor - umor (general) :)
- Date Edited:
3/9 1:26am (1 edits total)
Edited By:
ROGUESQUAD
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Desi ma indoiesc ca a ratat cineva acest articol...
 Triunghiul mortii
Calendaristic, astazi incepe una dintre cele mai mizerabile perioade din viata unui barbat, perioada pe care specialistii o numesc si Triunghiul Mortii: Valentine`s Day - 1 Martie - 8 Martie (bine, daca gagica-ta sufera de ecumenism, felicitari, te-ai incaltat si cu Dragobetele). Cele trei sarbatori ale mortii reprezinta sabatul negru al barbatului, care va fi nevoit sa participe, in tot acest timp, la ritualurile demonice de adorare a consoartei.
Triunghiul Mortii debuteaza cu sarbatoarea Sfintului Valentin, o zi in care barbatul executa un ceremonial pe linga care pina si dansul dracesc al broastelor riioase in fluieraturile copiilor morti nebotezati pare “Lacul Lebedelor”. Chiar daca este o zi in care ar sta cu placere peste program, barbatul va trebui s-o stearga mai devreme, ca sa se poata inghesui alaturi de alti nefericiti in magazinele cu inimioare, mutunache si alte asemenea obiecte pagine de cult (pe care, ulterior, gagica-sa le va pune la vedere prin casa, ca sa aiba prietenii lui un motiv ca lumea sa faca misto de el cind vin in vizita). Inarmat cu aceasta prima dovada de iubire (se pare ca pina si Iisus obisnuia sa le daruiasca ucenicilor Sai ursuleti de plus si inimioare de ciocolata, ca sa le arate ca-i iubeste), barbatul va trece pe la tarabele de flori, unde va jertfi inca o parte din salariu. Insa partea cu adevarat grea abia acum incepe. Dupa ce depune aceste marunte ofrande la picioarele gagica-sii, barbatul va trebui sa suporte calvarul unei iesiri romantice in oras. Va fi o seara placuta, la finele careia va intelege cit de fortata era comparatia cu sabatul negru: in fond, Satan nu vrea de la tine decit sufletul, nu-ti face praf salariul si nici nu pretinde sa te plimbi cinci ore cu el prin parc daca-l iubesti. Dupa 2 saptamini de refacere (asta, daca a reusit sa-si convinga prietena ca Dragobetele e o sarbatoare pentru taranii care n-au cablu si nu prind Eurosport), barbatul va da piept cu cea de-a doua incercare: Martisorul. Dupa cum desigur stiti, martisorul este un obiect artizanal de foarte mult bun gust, pe care femeile il poarta atirnat de piept pentru a vesti venirea primaverii. Se pare ca presupunerea oamenilor de stiinta cum ca pasarile calatoare stiu din instinct cind sa se intoarca din tarile calde este complet falsa; in realitate, ele sint anuntate de un porumbel voiajor: “Haideti, fetelor, ca au inceput proastele alea sa poarte martisor”.
Insa nimic nu-l poate bucura mai tare pe un salariat obisnuit, care se chinuie 12 luni pe an sa produca texte de calitate pentru un salariu mizer (v-ati dat seama, desigur, ca nu era vorba de mine cind am spus “texte de calitate”) decit 8 martie, o zi in care acesta va trebui sa caute un cadou frumos (care sa nu fie nici martisor, nici inimioara, fiindca imediat dupa 1 martie acestea devin niste kitsch-uri ordinare). Cadoul trebuie insotit obligatoriu de flori (care nu devin un kitsch ordinar dupa 1 martie, plus ca pretul florilor de 8 martie poate arunca lejer in criza intreaga economie mondiala) si de o noua iesire romantica in oras (unde, ca sa faci rost de o rezervare, s-ar putea sa fii nevoit sa-i rapesti familia chelnerului).
Specialistii nu au reusit sa-l identifice pe inventatorul acestor sarbatori, insa se presupune ca este vorba despre un dement care, dupa ce s-a insurat, a aruncat intreaga vina asupra omenirii si a jurat sa se razbune.
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Chantal
Registered:
Jun '05
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Date Posted:
3/9 6:46am
Subject:
RE: humor - umor (general) :)
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Eu l-am ratat. Dar Doamne, cat am mai putut rade... 
Finalul e genial.
-----signature-----
… We are such stuff
As dreams are made of, and our little life
Is rounded with a sleep.
(The Tempest, IV, 1, 17)
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ROGUESQUAD
Registered:
Oct '04
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Date Posted:
3/11 12:50am
Subject:
RE: humor - umor (general) :)
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Nu-mi amintesc sa se mai fi postat chestia asta p-aici...
A Woman's Poem
Before I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man, who's not a creep,
One who's handsome, smart and strong.
One who loves to listen long,
One who thinks before he speaks,
One who'll call, not wait for weeks.
I pray he's gainfully employed,
When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed.
Pulls out my chair and opens my door,
Massages my back and begs to do more.
Oh! Send me a man who'll make love to my mind,
Knows what to answer to 'how big is my behind?'
I pray that this man will love me to no end,
and always be my very best friend.
Man's Poem
I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with huge boobs who owns a bar on a golf course,
and loves to send me fishing and hunting.
This doesn't rhyme and I don't give a ****.
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