Author Topic: humor - umor (general) :)
SVAndrei 
Title: Co-CR FF Romania
Registered: Nov '04
41081_KDY Insignia
Date Posted: 3/22 10:10am Subject: RE: humor - umor (general) :)
laugh laugh

 

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ROGUESQUAD 
Registered: Oct '04
6624_X-Wing Fighter
Date Posted: 3/28 1:52am Subject: RE: humor - umor (general) :)
Intr-un copac stateau o soparla si un koala... si fumau marijuana...
La un moment dat i se face sete soparlei si se duce la rau sa bea apa. In rau era un crocodil si acesta ii soparlei : "Ce-i cu tine ma, ce esti asa de ametita?" Soparla ii raspunde " io si cu koala stam si fumam marijuana".
Intrigat, crocodilul se duce la copac sa vada cu ochii lui. Ajunge intr-un final, se uita sus la koala, la care koala se uita la el uimit si zice " CATA APA AI BAUT, BA ???"



Doi prieteni se intilnesc pe strada. Unul il vede pe celalalt cam abatut si-l intreaba:
- De ce esti asa suparat?
C: Uite, ma, eu brunet , nevasta-mea bruneta, copilul roscat.
M: Pai de cite ori faceti dragoste pe saptamina?
C: Niciodata.
M: Pe luna?
C: Da din cap negativ.
M: Pe an?
C: Iar da din cap negativ.
M: Pai vezi, rugina.



Pe Titanic, dupa impactul cu aisbergul, un individ reuseste sa ia o barca si vasleste disperat sa se salveze.
-Unde pleci dom'le ca mai sunt femei aici?
-Lasa-ma in pace omule, mie de femei imi arde acum?



Examen de fizica la politie. Subiectul: Fenomenul ionizarii. La sfarsitul examenului il intreaba unul din politisti pe colegul lui de banca din timpul examenului:
- Ma tu ai stiut?
- La perfectie ! - raspunde acesta.
- Sa-ti dea D-zeu sanatate zice primul, inseamna ca am stiut si eu, pentru ca am copiat cuvant cu cuvant de la tine.
Enervat si ingrijorat politistul care stiuse ii spune celuilalt:
- Idiotule, cum ai putut face una ca asta, acum o sa ne prinda si o sa ne pice pe amandoi!!
- Fii serios, ii raspunde cel care copiase, n-o sa se prinda nimeni pentru ca am mai si schimbat si eu pe ici pe colo . De exemplu unde tu ai pus Ion, eu am pus Gheorghe!



Vine Ion la Vasile si il intreaba:
- Cum poate vaca ta sa dea cate 100 litri de lapte pe zi?
Vasile:
- E simplu. Totul depinde de amabilitate. Ma apropii de ea si o intreb : "Ce avem astazi, lapte sau carne?"



Care sunt cele 3 faze ale sclerozei?

Faza intai:intri la toaleta, iti faci treaba si uiti sa tragi apa.
Faza a doua: intri, tragi apa si uiti de ce ai intrat.
Faza a treia: intri, termini treaba, tragi apa, dar uiti sa-ti dai jos pantalonii.











 

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Chantal 
Registered: Jun '05
42092_Darth Talon
Date Posted: 4/7 8:55am Subject: RE: humor - umor (general) :)
Din sectiunea "traim in Romania", savurati urmatorul interviu:
http://www.catavencu.ro/fun/fabricat_in_romania/se_cauta_un_traducator_din_limba_vasluiana.html

shock

 

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Claude_ICE-C 
Registered: May '05
23523_Thrawn
Date Posted: 4/8 4:27am Subject: RE: humor - umor (general) :)
doamne cum se poate asa ceva ... imi aduce aminte de Voronin cand a venit la summit si a cerut sa i se traduca din romana in moldoveneasca doh!

 

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Chantal 
Registered: Jun '05
42092_Darth Talon
Date Posted: 4/24 2:35pm Subject: RE: humor - umor (general) :)
Din sectiunea "sa va cracanati de ras", va prezint urmatoarea duduie si siteul ei:
http://www.naomy.ro/index.php?pag=index

sick

 

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FriendlyPiranha 
Title: Graphic artist
FF Romania

Registered: Feb '05
40314_Boba Fett
Date Posted: 4/27 6:11am Subject: RE: humor - umor (general) :)
Care duduie, ca eu nu vad niciuna?
De apreciat ca ai pus si tu linku' ala mai calumea.
grin

 

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Milena_Syan 
Registered: Sep '05
45271_Assaj Ventress
Date Posted: 4/27 1:38pm Subject: RE: humor - umor (general) :)
It's her right to dress up as a woman and to express her views.
However, nothing excuses the inadequate use of romanian - I don't care what field she's working in, knowing the basic rules of one's native language is a 'must' in my book!
Btw, I'm not an expert in web development - and certainly not a graphic artist - but the design of that site, or rather the lack of it, gets on my nerves.

 

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Darth_Garak 
Registered: Jul '05
42321_Mandalore the Ultimate
Date Posted: 5/6 2:06pm Subject: RE: humor - umor (general) :)
Extremely funny reviews of games (and yes he mostly just trashes whatever he can). I don't consider them actual reviews so much as alternative comedy. Merita vazuta toate (all three pages) just don't drink anything while viewing or you'll end up like me, having to wipe Pepsi off the keybord and then letting the thing dry.

http://www.escapistmagazine.com/articles/view/editorials/zeropunctuation/2694-Zero-Punctuation-Assassin-s-Creed (short link, ain't it?)

 

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Chantal 
Registered: Jun '05
42092_Darth Talon
Date Posted: 5/10 1:15pm Subject: RE: humor - umor (general) :)
A spoof for the Citroen commercials with the robot-car, by Chevy:
http://www.totallycrap.com/videos/videos_chevrolet_transformer_tastic_ad/

Hihi. "Please... let's go home" [exasperated, pleading voice]

 

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… We are such stuff
As dreams are made of, and our little life
Is rounded with a sleep.
(The Tempest, IV, 1, 17)
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Chantal 
Registered: Jun '05
42092_Darth Talon
Date Posted: 5/14 2:24pm Subject: RE: humor - umor (general) :)
ABUZ= (Om) fara buze
APOI= apa mare
BIZAR=zar dublu
MACEL= mac mic
MICROSCOP= scop marunt
SOIOS= de soi
INVIORAT = Prevazut cu vioara
INFOCARE = transformare in foca
IMPRASTIERE = rezultatul procesului prin care betivii se fac prastie
GHINIOANE = varianta moldoveneasca pentru ardelenescul "Bine, Ioane"
LESINA = pe unde merge "le tren"
MERITORIU = teritoriul ocupat de livada de meri
RATEU = pateu din carne de ratza
SCARABEU = cetatean ce locuieste la bloc, la scara a doua; din aceeasi familie de cuvinte se cunosc scaraceu si scaradeu.
TRACTOR = actor cu mult trac
TUTUN = a-a-arma de-de-de a-a-artilerie
TZURTZUR = Sunetul soneriei, iarna
BATALION = fratele mai mic al plutonierului Batal Gheorghe

Mie cel mai mult imi place aia cu "infocare" si "lesina". grin

 

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… We are such stuff
As dreams are made of, and our little life
Is rounded with a sleep.
(The Tempest, IV, 1, 17)
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CyberFaust 
Title: FanForce CR
FF Romania

Registered: Jun '05
8199_Han Solo
Date Posted: 5/14 3:26pm Subject: RE: humor - umor (general) :)
apoi infocare si ghinioane mie. grin

 

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"And God shalt smite thee who watcheth the Wars of Stars. Repent ye all who hath sinned with Jar Jar andeth been diddled by C3PO." - Lies 3:64
http://boards.theforce.net/romania/b10647/p1
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CyberFaust 
Title: FanForce CR
FF Romania

Registered: Jun '05
8199_Han Solo
Date Posted: 5/14 11:47pm Subject: RE: humor - umor (general) :)
http://youtube.com/watch?v=UkILePFsXdk&feature=related
THIS IS GOLD.

 

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I hate broccoli
And think it totally sucks
Why is it not meat?
"And God shalt smite thee who watcheth the Wars of Stars. Repent ye all who hath sinned with Jar Jar andeth been diddled by C3PO." - Lies 3:64
http://boards.theforce.net/romania/b10647/p1
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Darth_Garak 
Registered: Jul '05
42321_Mandalore the Ultimate
Date Posted: 5/15 3:57am Subject: RE: humor - umor (general) :) - Date Edited: 5/15 3:58am (1 edits total) Edited By: Darth_Garak
By the Force laugh Aia l-au intrebat pe Palpatine ce pot face for fun? laugh

 

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CyberFaust 
Title: FanForce CR
FF Romania

Registered: Jun '05
8199_Han Solo
Date Posted: 5/16 1:24am Subject: RE: humor - umor (general) :)
2 faceau dragoste, iar la un moment dat el zice:
- pentru ca esti prima pentru mine am sa iti zic Eva;
ea raspunde:
- pentru ca esti al 407-lea pentru mine am sa iti spun Peugeot!

 

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I hate broccoli
And think it totally sucks
Why is it not meat?
"And God shalt smite thee who watcheth the Wars of Stars. Repent ye all who hath sinned with Jar Jar andeth been diddled by C3PO." - Lies 3:64
http://boards.theforce.net/romania/b10647/p1
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Darth_Garak 
Registered: Jul '05
42321_Mandalore the Ultimate
Date Posted: 5/21 6:31am Subject: RE: humor - umor (general) :) - Date Edited: 5/21 6:40am (1 edits total) Edited By: Darth_Garak
http://www.cracked.com/article_16275_9-most-devastating-insults-from-around-world.html WARNING: some (if not most) of that stuff might be considered offensive. Especially the last one - care aparent ne apartine dar jur ca in viata mea nu am auzit ceva asa gretos. Ugh.

 

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