| Author |
Topic:
Star Wars Humour
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Jauhzmynn
Registered:
Jun '02
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Date Posted:
10/5/02 6:47pm
Subject:
Star Wars Humour
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Hey all, here's a kicker. If you like this I have some more. Let me knwo what you think.:-)
Jauhzmynn
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How R2-D2 Saved Me From A State Trooper
A True Story
Last sunday I was driving home rather briskly, exceeding the speed limit by generous proportions, and as one would guess I was promptly pulled over by the state police. The trooper noticed on the dash of my car a 6-inch R2-D2. First thing he said was "I love that Droid!"
Knowing he was a fan, I pulled the best Obi-Wan impression I could muster, and said, "He is for sale if you want him". The trooper looked puzzleed, but I continued. "You don't need to see my identification..." The subtle hand gesture was used as well, and I could tell he was getting the gist. "I can go about my business..." The trooper broke loose with a wide, carnivorous grin, and I knew I had him.
"Move along..." I said. The trooper aped the response "Move along, Move along", waving me to move along. Unsure if the gag had worked, I hesitated. The trooper at this point was deep in a belly laugh and urged me to get back on the road and slow it down. As ordered, I moved along... Looking in the rear view, I saw him laying back on his hood laughing up into the evening sky.
Saved by the Force!
This was a true story, by the way... and it proves what Obi Wan said about the force's influence on the minds of troopers.
-----signature-----
Lightside Jedi Knight Jauhzmynn Enz :-)
Isa. 42:6-9 , 2 Cor. 5:17, Eph 6:10-18
www.thejediassembly.com
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Aurra_Glow
Registered:
Jul '01
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Date Posted:
10/5/02 7:33pm
Subject:
RE: Star Wars Humour
|
 Dude, that's the best thing I've heard in a while!
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Darth_Tarpals
Registered:
Jun '02
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Date Posted:
10/5/02 8:08pm
Subject:
RE: Star Wars Humour
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I'll have to tell that one to my dad. God knows how many speeding tickets he'll get now that he actually has a car with an ENGINE. 
-----signature-----
Yaddle is STILL Sifo-Dyas.
ROTJ: Action! Suspense! Excitement! Drama! Dancing Teddybears! What more could you possibly want?
Have you slapped a rat lately?
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Jauhzmynn
Registered:
Jun '02
|
Date Posted:
10/5/02 9:04pm
Subject:
RE: Star Wars Humour
|
great, I'm glad you guys like it. I do have more jokes.
Anyone want to hear about Red Neck Jedis?
I'll post just a little portion, if you like more, tell me.
-------------------------------------------
"You know You'er Red Neck Jedi If...."
Your Jedi robe is camouflage color.
You use your lightsaber to open your bottle of Coke.
There is a blaster rack in the back of your landspeeder.
You use your lightsaber to pick your teeth.
At least one section of your X-Wing is bondo colored.
You have bantha horns on the front of your landspeeder.
You can't describe the taste of an Ewok without using the word chicken.
You can find no grammatical errors in the way Yoda talks.
You think that Stormtroopers are just KKK members with really good sheets.
A peaceful meditation is one without gas.
You can levitate yourself using a force from within, but not THE force.
---------------------------------------------
There's more. 
Jauhzmynn
-----signature-----
Lightside Jedi Knight Jauhzmynn Enz :-)
Isa. 42:6-9 , 2 Cor. 5:17, Eph 6:10-18
www.thejediassembly.com
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Aurra_Glow
Registered:
Jul '01
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Date Posted:
10/5/02 9:09pm
Subject:
RE: Star Wars Humour
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How about you're a jedi redneck if you kiss your sister? *cough*LUKE*cough*
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Darth_Tarpals
Registered:
Jun '02
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Date Posted:
10/5/02 9:13pm
Subject:
RE: Star Wars Humour
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I've got one.. You're a redneck Jedi if you have a primer-colored landspeeder up on blocks in your front yard.
-----signature-----
Yaddle is STILL Sifo-Dyas.
ROTJ: Action! Suspense! Excitement! Drama! Dancing Teddybears! What more could you possibly want?
Have you slapped a rat lately?
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Aurra_Glow
Registered:
Jul '01
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Date Posted:
10/5/02 9:20pm
Subject:
RE: Star Wars Humour
- Date Edited:
10/5/02 9:27pm (1 edits total)
Edited By:
Aurra_Glow
|
You're a redneck if you've got more padawan braids than teeth.
If the horn on your speeder plays "Dixie".
If you say "Now, git!" instead of "May the force be with you,"
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Jauhzmynn
Registered:
Jun '02
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Date Posted:
10/5/02 9:55pm
Subject:
RE: Star Wars Humour
|
EXCELLANT! You'er in, More then I'd hoped for.:D I do have more Redneck Jedi items.
Pt 2: "You'er A Red neck Jedi If..."
You lost a hand during a lightsaber fight because you stopped to spit.
You think the worst part about spending time on Dagobah is the "dadgum
skeeters."
Wookies are offended by your B.O.
You use the force to get yourself another soda so you didn't have to wait
for a commercial.
Your father said to you, "Shoot, Son, com'on over tuh the dark side, it'll
be a hoot."
You use your R-2 unit's self-defense electro-shock thingy to get the
barbecue to light.
The moonshine still you built on Endor is hidden so well even the Ewoks
can't find it.
You have a stuffed womp rat over your fireplace.
Darth Vader says "Luke, I am your father...and your uncle."
You have 3 X-Wings on blocks in your yard, between all of them you've half a working craft.
-----signature-----
Lightside Jedi Knight Jauhzmynn Enz :-)
Isa. 42:6-9 , 2 Cor. 5:17, Eph 6:10-18
www.thejediassembly.com
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Aurra_Glow
Registered:
Jul '01
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Date Posted:
10/5/02 9:57pm
Subject:
RE: Star Wars Humour
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Aurra_Glow
Registered:
Jul '01
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Date Posted:
10/5/02 10:05pm
Subject:
RE: Star Wars Humour
- Date Edited:
10/5/02 10:06pm (1 edits total)
Edited By:
Aurra_Glow
|
You might be a jedi redneck if you...
have barbeque sauce in the tip of your padawan braid.
introduce yourself as "one of them force-magic queers,"
can use a jedi mind trick on yourself to quit smoking.
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Jauhzmynn
Registered:
Jun '02
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Date Posted:
10/5/02 10:17pm
Subject:
RE: Star Wars Humour
|
ROTFLMHO!!!!
Oh man :-)) ::Wipes tear from eyes, then glacnes around temple for disturbed Masters from meditations,::
Ok BBque sauce on the end of the Padawan braid doesn't make you a red Neck, now if you USED the braid to BASTE the ribs, yeah. :-)
keep 'em coming it's funny.:D I'll scout around for more. In the mean time, I have to outrun some Jedi I'd disturbed from mediating from my laughing. :-)
::Takes off:: I'll return with more.
J
-----signature-----
Lightside Jedi Knight Jauhzmynn Enz :-)
Isa. 42:6-9 , 2 Cor. 5:17, Eph 6:10-18
www.thejediassembly.com
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Aurra_Glow
Registered:
Jul '01
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Date Posted:
10/5/02 10:31pm
Subject:
RE: Star Wars Humour
|
You might be a jedi redneck if you...
Use the force...to scratch your ass.
Lost your arm in a battle with Dooku because you couldn't stop laughing at how his lightsaber hilt looks like a g-spot tickler.
Have your own womprat-jerky factory.
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lumberjedi
Registered:
Aug '02
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Date Posted:
10/5/02 11:03pm
Subject:
RE: Star Wars Humour
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You might be a Jedi Redneck if...
Chewbacca is hairier then your armpits.
You laugh when you hear the name Fett.
You watching the Geonosis battle from your Holovid in your Trailor while chugging a six-pack of Alderaanian Ale and eating Bantha-jerky.
-----signature-----
Life.
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Headhunter0183
Registered:
Sep '02
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Date Posted:
10/6/02 6:22am
Subject:
RE: Star Wars Humour
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Your a red neck Jedi if ...
you use the force to jiggle the toilet handle.
-----signature-----
The crystal is the heart of the blade.The heart is the crystal of the jedi.
The jedi is the crystal of the force.The force is the blade of the heart.
All are intertwined. The blade, the jedi, the force.
You are one.
www.headhunterspropshop.com
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Aurra_Glow
Registered:
Jul '01
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Date Posted:
10/6/02 11:13am
Subject:
RE: Star Wars Humour
- Date Edited:
10/6/02 11:14am (1 edits total)
Edited By:
Aurra_Glow
|
You're a jedi redneck if...
you refer to your padawan braid as your rat-tail and your padawan haircut as your space mullet.
your name is jedi-master cletus.
you constantly get into disagreements with Master Yoda over whether they're called "younglings" or "youngins".
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Jauhzmynn
Registered:
Jun '02
|
Date Posted:
10/6/02 5:00pm
Subject:
RE: Star Wars Humour
|
you mean to scratch your backside. :-)
-----signature-----
Lightside Jedi Knight Jauhzmynn Enz :-)
Isa. 42:6-9 , 2 Cor. 5:17, Eph 6:10-18
www.thejediassembly.com
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