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Author	Topic: Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 9/22/08
Tahi Registered: Jun '02	Date Posted: 5/19 11:22pm Subject: RE: Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 5/9/08
	It would be a fair exchange - one Sith Lord for a battered, uncertain, weary Knight. Oh dear - I don't like the way Obi's thinking. Although Qui-Gon appeared to be better than he had the previous night, Obi-Wan could see the lines of pain around his mouth and the way he held himself. His Master was up to his old tricks, trying to be stoic in the face of duty. Gah - these silly men! They need a slap with a wet trout sometimes. [we need a wet trout icon] Qui-Gon sat there, looking thunderous. "I am well aware of my injuries and the potential for problems. I'm more concerned about Obi-Wan." They're both almost crippled with worry about each other. This does not bode well. But it sounds SO like them both. Boy that Healer Leabe is a little ray of sunshine isn't he! Not. LOL As he sat there, staring at them both, he remembered, too, the knobby-kneed girl who listened wide-eyed to him all those years ago, who had absorbed every lesson and wanted more. But that girl was gone. Now there was only a woman on the brink of Knighthood, a woman who had hurt him and he her, a woman he hardly knew. Poor Obi - even his memories bring nothing but sadness and regret. Master Obi-Wan, the Healer said that you have to eat something. You'll need your strength." She shoved a nutrient bar into his hand. "At least this." Och, no lassie - the man needs a wee dram. D'ye ken? He frowned, staring down at her fingertips; her small hand lay so stark against the shredded cloth of Jedi failure that it hurt to look. Wonderful metaphor. Your exposition of Obi's mindset is just great - just the way you capture the negativity and fatalism of his mood. I love the way Atel tries to help him. Obi-Wan had a very bad feeling about this. He's not the only one - but you have to have faith don't you? Despair is the worst sin of all. Wonderful post - emotional though. But that's good. (But don't tell Obi I said that!) -----signature----- Anahiri #6 http://boards.theforce.net/fan_fiction_resource/b10304/18446448/p33 The magazine for A/T fans Many Happy Returns http://boards.theforce.net/beyond_the_saga/b10477/11018706/p81/?2011 Master to THE_PIED_PIPER
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dianethx Registered: Mar '02	Date Posted: 5/21 2:45pm Subject: RE: Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 5/9/08
	calimora – Poor Obi-Wan indeed. He's got a lot on his plate and it's only going to get worse. Thanks about Atel. She's trying to do what's right. As for the infamous feeling… we shall see. Thanks. Valairy_Scot – I assume you liked it. LOL. Thanks. wolf_kenobi – Thanks. I'm glad you liked it. Obi-Wan has a lot of anger right now. When he's thought about it, he might be more amenable but at the moment, he's not too happy with the Jedi. Yes, it doesn't look good. A Sith Lord with a room full of traps. Not looking good at all. Thanks for reading. Magier – Yes, Obi-Wan realizes that he's not really up to doing this with the negative emotions plus his injuries. He probably should have said no, even with all the pressures on him. Staying, though, isn't really an option. He's so worried about Qui-Gon that he's willing to put aside his concerns to keep him safe. Atel is trying, late as it may be, but she is trying. Thanks. I'm glad you liked it. Musing – LOL on the fussing. Yes, they are. They need to take care of each other. As a team, they are better than separately but there are still issues to deal with. Atel has wishful thinking on her side. At the moment, Obi-Wan isn't at his best and I doubt that he would help the Order in his current state. So much corruption and his anger isn't helping. It would be nice to get help from the Bendu. Do you think Sle'fey and Xacor would allow it? Thanks. Happy that you liked it! Jedi_Perigrine – It certainly is a long story. It will take quite a bit to read. But it's a logical extension of 'But' in the archives. Thanks. Have a good long read. Cole_Kenobi – Thanks. I do take a long time. The post coming up gave me fits because there was a couple of ways I could write it and I tried them all. I'm happy you like it so much. I did try to keep the characters similar to the movies and yet have a logical direction that would occur with the new directions they've taken. I'm happy to hear that they were effective. Atel has come a long way and I think she would really help Obi-Wan to regain his center once they are past this problem of Palpatine. Thanks. I'm glad that you are reading. BrightFeather – No, Palpy is anything but decrepit. He's a force to be overcome. Thanks. Gkilkenny – Thanks. They are off to battle a Sith Lord in the post after this. I'm going to be going back and forth between Naboo and Coruscant for a while. Thanks. Kitara – Nope, Obi is in no shape to be going. But he's going anyway. Thanks. Ocelotl_Nesto – Obi isn't ready just yet to say sorry. Don't forget it's only been one day since he saw Qui-Gon almost get murdered, he raped Tharten's mind, Atel betrayed him and he found out he was a pawn in Sle'fey's game. Plus he's injured. A couple more days and I'm sure he'd be back. If he makes it. Thanks. jedidas3 – Thanks. I'm glad you liked it, Padawan. It's been hard work but at last I can see the end coming up. The beautifully written is really hard for me. I don't update for months because of it. Drives me nuts. Thanks. Independence1776 – Yep, Obi needs time but there isn't any. Thanks about the twisting of the canon line. I thought it would be appropriate seeing that she's Obi's padawan. Yes, Qui-Gon would be better to help the Jedi at the moment than Obi-Wan. We shall have to see what happens. Thanks. Kivas – The game is afoot! Yes, Yoda got kicked out, too so he's a great asset to the Bendu. Thanks for reading. Leona – I'm glad that Obi's problems are clear. Thanks. Next post coming up. Tahi – They are indeed worried about each other. I think that pretty well carries throughout JA and the movie. It may not bode well but that's just the way they are. LOL. Yes, Leabe is a ray of sunshine. He's not one to pull punches when he needs to. Thanks. I tried very hard to get Obi-Wan showing that he's feeling utter despair and fatalism, almost suicidal for the moment. He's got a lot on his plate. But I didn't want it to be too over the top. Because Obi is an optimist at heart. Thanks. I wanted him to be at a low ebb. Because it can get better, right? Right?? LOL. Thanks so much for reading. -----signature----- Betrayal - http://boards.theforce.net/s/b1/10935143 updated 9/22/08 Fragments of Illusion- http://boards.theforce.net/bts/b10475/28456473 updated 8/16/08 Freeze frame - http://boards.theforce.net/s/b10476/27820434 Master to jedidas3 Impeach Bush!
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dianethx Registered: Mar '02	Date Posted: 5/21 2:59pm Subject: RE: Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 5/9/08
	Yes, I've been writing. I'm trying to write at least 100 words a day and it seems to be working. And now we are back on Naboo.... Chapter 34 - Headlong into danger His heart beating fast, Anakin pushed the speeder to maximum, past maximum, poured all his anxiety into flying toward the Jinn farm as quickly as he could. He could feel the currents of the Force twisting around them, black ice and smoky death clotting the air, clogging his throat with dread. He just hoped that he wouldn't be too late, that his pride hadn't cost Le'orath and Ben their lives. He knew that Qui-Gon would never forgive him. He'd never forgive himself if something happened to them. Frowning, knowing that he needed to focus on piloting and not his fears, he gripped the speeder stick harder, pushed for more speed. He zipped past slow moving loader droids, and streaked around beings who had no business getting in his way even if it was a public thoroughfare. They should have known better than to block his path and slow him down. Lives depended on him reaching the farm in time and no one and nothing was going to stop him. He ignored the gestures; the curses that followed were lost in the wind. Besides, Anakin's mission was far too important to worry about a few words. He just pushed past the limits, pouring on more and more speed. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see that Master Windu had already stopped talking into his commlink, and now was sitting there, hands white-knuckled on the seat. Master Qui-Gon had often done that as well - whenever Anakin had been driving. But Windu didn't complain, just sat there with eyes forward, scowling as usual, intent on their goal. In the distance, Anakin could see that the weather was worsening, moisture-laden clouds churning, wheeling over the landscape, shrouding the tops of the mountains in darkness. There were stabs of brilliance as lightning skittered across the stone cliffs and down into the valley. Even the trees on either side of the road were whipping in the wind. The storm was going to be a bad one. He could only hope that it slowed down the demon from his visions. As they approached the Jinn farm, Anakin angled toward the house. That's where Le'orath and Ben would be, the two of them waiting out the storm in the safety of their home. They would be readying themselves for dinner and a quiet time alone - without Anakin or Qui-Gon Jinn. There was something wrong, however. Le'orath hadn't answered her commlink although Master Windu had tried several times. But more importantly, the Force itself felt tainted, contaminated, streaked with pain and black desperation. Overlaying it all was a kind of sick glee. Swallowing back the bile that had risen in his throat at the thought that they might be too late after all, he looked more closely at the house. In the thickening gloom, he could see eye-searing red light flashing through the windows. It looked like it was coming from the kitchen area. It looked like a lightsaber. Kriff. "Janson, we've reached the Jinn farm." Beside him, Windu was talking into his commlink, measured, deadly serious. "Skywalker was right. There is someone here, likely our killer. Send Drallig, Ven'ta and Helseg here as fast as you can. Has anyone returned from the other site?" Anakin didn't hear the reply. He was too busy piloting the speeder, desperately trying not to think about why a saber was sweeping through the house. "Good. I want a team here, quickly. I want to catch this murderer. We'll keep him occupied until you arrive. Windu out." As Master Windu clicked off, a nightmare in black and deeper black strode out of the house, one hand holding a long-handled lightsaber in his hand. The blade was a sickening blood red. It was the monster from his visions, the being who had killed hundreds of former Jedi and had brought fear to the Bendu, the fiend who had haunted him in dreams full of agony and death. Fury blazing through him, Anakin shoved the speeder stick forward. There was a sharp whine as the vehicle leapt straight for the Zabrek but he ignored the noise. Running the murderer down would be rough justice but he wanted to catch this rsshak filth and end it once and for all. His actions seemed to amuse the killer. A feral grin slimed across the Zabrek's face as he sauntered toward the barn, dragging his saber on the ground, taunting them to follow. The door closed behind him. The speeder half-skidded on the gravel as Anakin braked hard but at least it was enough to keep it from slamming into the building. Windu grunted surprise but Anakin didn't even blink. He had more important things to think about. He couldn't feel Le'orath's presence in the Force. She was never strong since her midichlorian level was not high, but she should be there somewhere. Ben's presence was muted but at least he could sense that he was close by. Swallowing hard, Anakin tried to push aside the fear that they might be too late after all. It could be that the Dark energies were twisting the currents, clogging them in a black morass of hatred and sick triumph and pain so that even his normally strong Force sense was weakened. Or it could be that Le'orath was dead and Ben dying. A single unsure moment and he knew what he had to do. Much as he wanted to cut down that filth, his first priority must be to make sure Le'orath and Ben were all right. Qui-Gon would never forgive him if his family were in danger and he did nothing. Besides, Windu could handle the Zabrek. With one last look toward the barn, still unsure if he was making the right decision, Anakin twisted around the speeder, and angled toward the house, intent on looking for Qui-Gon's family. As he scrambled past Windu, focused on his mission, the Bendu Champion reached out and brought Anakin up short. "Where are you going, Skywalker? The killer is in there." Jerking his head toward the barn, Windu was frowning at him, looking as if he were a contemptible fool who didn't know which way was up. "I'm going to find Le'orath and Ben," Anakin snarled back. "Your first priority should be the capture of the killer, not going off on some wild bantha chase." The man was not giving up but Anakin was tired of listening to him. With each second, his friends were in more danger. "That demon was in the house. They could be dying." "Yes, they could and they would not thank you for letting their murderer get away." Tightening his grip, Windu pointed out, "Neither would Qui-Gon." "I don't have time for this." He jerked out of his grasp and stood there glaring at him. He could feel his heart beating wildly and it seemed almost as if he would fly into pieces. He had to do something and the old man was only in the way. Windu was cold as ice, his words said through clenched teeth and scorn. "If we let the killer get away, we may never have another chance to catch him. Qui-Gon would be furious if you let your attachments get in the way of duty. Are you going to ignore his teaching for your own selfish desires just so you can be a hero?" "How dare you!" Anakin was absolutely furious. "I dare." Windu growled contempt at him. "You said it. We must take the killer together. As a team." Letting out a breath that sounded suspiciously like an annoyed sigh, he said more gently, "I need you, Skywalker." "But Le'orath and Ben. I can't...." For a moment, the thought of it pulled him into grief. If he did as Master Windu asked and Le'orath and Ben died for it, he'd never forgive himself. "Anakin, think. What would Qui-Gon do?" The man was standing over him, pushing him to answer, frowning for a reply. "What would he do?" "His duty, damn you." Anakin snarled back. "Then do yours, Apprentice Skywalker." Anakin looked away, jaw working, furious at being reprimanded. Qui-Gon would never have treated him this way; his Master would have reminded him of duty and the need for focus but he would have accepted him as a partner. He would not have talked to him as if he were some fresh-faced kid or troublesome insect. Qui-Gon respected his abilities. They'd been through so much together and depended on each other for support. Windu, on the other hand, had always disliked him. He had gone out of his way to make Anakin look like a fool many times and now was no different. But he also knew that Qui-Gon would expect him to do his best, and truth be told, Master Windu was right - much as he hated to admit it. Qui-Gon would do what needed to be done, regardless of attachments. Much as he wanted to punch that smug look off the Bendu's face, he could not. Instead he gave an abrupt nod. That was all it took. Reaching into the speeder, Windu shoved cortosis gauntlets into Anakin's hands. "Good. Now, we will try and take him, or at least slow him down until the other Bendu get here." He pulled his own pair of gauntlets on, then grabbed a second lightpike and shoved it into the back of his belt. "Do you know what to do?" Growling displeasure at being questioned like an errant youngling, Anakin snapped, "Catch him, of course." The glare that came back could have vaporized most of Naboo but Anakin only matched him look for look. Muttering for a moment under his breath, the Bendu Champion appeared as if he were about to explode. Brown eyes staring into his, Master Windu said, "Skywalker, we'll go in together. Ready for him, not rushing headlong into danger like some kind of crazed gundark." He scowled at him. "Because if you go scurrying in there unprepared, he'll slice you apart." Shaking his head, Windu seemed to center himself, letting his anger bleed into the Force. In a much calmer, clearer voice, he said, "Anakin, regardless of our past differences, we need to work together if we are going to succeed." For a long moment, Anakin said nothing, trying to force down his fury, trying to find his center, trying to do what Qui-Gon would want him to do. He knew what he had to say - difficult as it was. Finally, he reached down into the speeder, pulled out a blaster and tucked it into his belt. Then shoving his gauntlets on, he bowed his head in sharp acceptance. "Yes, Master Windu. Together." Mace Windu frowned, staring at him suspiciously. Perhaps he'd expected more of an argument but Anakin didn't care. They needed to find the murderer and then go look for Ben and Le'orath. Every second spent standing there arguing was time lost. Windu must have realized that as well. With one last thoughtful look at Anakin, he nodded toward the barn. "Let's go." ****************************** It was quiet inside, almost as silent as a tomb - except for the rustling of a few birds high above. Normally at this time of day, the building would be full of afternoon light, the sunshine streaming through the high windows. But now with the storm fast approaching, it was gloom-filled, pockets of darkness in the corners and behind discarded equipment were only more shadows. With a bit of dust rising into the air, it seemed almost a stage waiting for action. Le'orath had clearly been preparing for harvest. Several mechanicals were lined up along the near wall and there was a scatter of metal gears and droid arms on the far bench. Other machinery was tucked into bays, waiting for the appropriate time to be moved out into the fields. Surprisingly, the center of the barn wasn't clean. There were dirt and greenery scattered about, vines and branches and leaves each in their own neat pile, and distinct lines of gravel connecting them all. It looked like a map fit for a young boy to play in. Apparently Ben had been busy. The thought of them both drove Anakin back into grief. If Le'orath died because of his decision to go with Master Windu, he'd never forgive himself. He did have one consolation; he could feel Ben close by. He was still alive, but his Force presence was muted as if he were hurt or in hiding. He hoped that Ben was all right and that he would stay away. Protecting a child would only make things more difficult in their hunt for the killer and if Ben got caught in the middle of a battle, Anakin wasn't sure he'd be able to keep him safe. But now was not the time for anxiety. He had to keep his focus on the here and now as Qui-Gon had so often told him to do. There was no room for mistakes. Gripping his lightstaff tighter, he stared into the darkness, looking for likely spots for a murderer to hide. On his left, Windu was slowly circling the open space in the barn, his hand on his lightstaff, his face frowning in concentration. Even with the disturbing touch of contamination in the Force, Anakin could sense the currents moving outward, like a droplet rippling still water, and knew that the Bendu was trying to find their adversary. Anakin felt strangely vulnerable. There was no hint of where they might find the killer. He didn't think it was possible that the slime had left the building, although Anakin's argument with Windu, in all his obstinate blindness, had lasted far too long. It was more likely that the killer was still there and using the shadows in the Force to mask his presence. He moved to the center and looked up towards the training equipment high over his head, watched the dust particles floating in the air, listened for any clue to the murderer's presence. He heard nothing. Instead, there was a kind of stillness as if the galaxy were holding its collective breath. Then from a far corner off to his right, he heard a young voice thick with emotion, whispering, "He hurt Mama." "Ben?" Anakin wanted to turn around and find the boy and get him out of there but he didn't dare. Instead, focusing on trying to find the murderer, he said urgently, "Where is he, Ben?" A little hiccup of grief as he sniffed back, "Back there, behind the Treadwell. The bad man. He hurt Mama." "Stay where you are. We'll take care of him." Anakin felt sick but he pushed past the sorrow and tried to focus on keeping Ben safe. He needed him to stay hidden in case there was fighting; he'd only be a liability. He just hoped that the boy would listen. Before Ben could say anything else, a rough chuckle crawled down the walls, the sound dark and poisonous and so very sure. "I gutted her. She was hardly worth the effort but she screamed well enough." Another laugh and then the voice turned pleasure-husky. "Almost as well as the Jedi trash I butchered yesterday." In the distance, he could hear Ben startled gasp and then crying as if his heart had broken. Anakin wanted to weep, too. But with every foul word, his universe turned a deeper and deeper red. He wanted to find that filthy murderous slime and cut him into little pieces. He wanted to hear him scream as he fell apart. He wanted to pummel what was left of the body until there was nothing but blood and pulverized bone. Too late. For Le'orath, it was far too late. And it was all his fault. Starting forward, intent on making that rsshak slime pay, Anakin could only blink surprise when he was jerked back. His vision clearing, he recognized Mace Windu's thunderous face and the look of frowning distaste that he did so well. Still holding onto Anakin, one hand gripping him tightly, Mace's voice was gentle as he whispered, "Ben , stay where you are. We'll come get you and go look for your mother when we're done here." Then he turned back to Anakin, saying flatly, "He's baiting you. Don't trust anything he says." Anakin was about to reply when out of the darkness came more scornful words. "Ah, Master Windu. Excellent. Let me disembowel your little pet and then we shall have some sport, you and I." The Zabrek sounded both contemptuous and eager for a fight. Anakin was certainly eager as well. "I am not his pet," he shouted back. Incensed, he kept looking around for a way to reach the Zabrek's location, to get in a strike in before the killer realized what was happening. He knew where the automaton was kept; he could even see one of the Treadwell's arms in the gloom and Ben has said that he was behind it. If he could just inch around to the back of the barn, he'd have a chance at destroying that slime before he knew what hit him. But Windu wouldn't let go of his arm. The killer's sarcastic comments were getting on his nerves, too. "Master Windu, where did you pick up such a pathetic mongrel? Couldn't you have thrown him back and gotten someone worthy of your time?" "Why you...." That did it. Anakin wanted to fly, feet-first and kick in the filth's crooked teeth - if Windu would just let him go. "Skywalker...." The sharp, exasperated way Windu said it only fed his anger. Anakin finally gave a sharp tug and pulled out of his grasp. But scowling at him didn't stop the Bendu from saying, "You don't know if he's telling the truth. He could be lying so that you would forget your training and give into emotion. This is not the way to capture him." "It's better than just standing here," Anakin snapped back. Mace Windu only shook his head, muttering under his breath, looking at him with contempt in his eyes. "Skywalker, enough. You are making things worse." Then straightening up, he said in a loud, clear voice, "If you surrender now, we will give you a fair trial. Bendu don't kill unless absolutely necessary." There was movement high up and several birds flew out from one of the darkened corners. A sharp spike in the Force and the birds wheeled tight near the ceiling, panicking, and then fell like stones onto the floor below. There was the soft plop, plop of meat hitting the ground. Glancing down at the bodies scattered at his feet, Anakin felt ill. The birds had been crushed, nothing but feathers and bone and black blood. Harmless creatures and the Zabrek had destroyed them without thought. They had their answer. It looked as if Master Windu was about to give into his own anger. Anakin knew that Mace's reputation was that of a stoic, controlled Bendu Champion but he also had an emotional side that he rarely showed to his peers. That Anakin had experienced it spoke volumes about just how annoyed Windu could get with him at times. The fact of the matter was that they drove each other insane on a normal day and this day was far from normal. After a moment, Windu seemed to calm, taking in a deep breath and letting it out slowly. Eyes narrowed as he glanced down at the dead birds, he murmured, "Ben mentioned the Treadwell." "It's in the back, just below the rings, under the second level rack," Anakin whispered. "I know exactly where it is. I can get to him and end this." "No, he'll be waiting for you." Mace said softly, "He has the advantage. We need to flush him out." "But I don't...." "If you go charging in there alone, he'll cut you into ribbons." But before he could object again, Windu sent him another quelling look, one that Qui-Gon often used when he thought he was being an idiot. "Skywalker, teamwork. Remember?" He shoved down his impatience. It would seem that the Naboo sun would grow cold and dead before Master Mace Windu would finally do something. Anakin wanted to fly into the darkness and kill the rsshak slime, not wait around like a fool. But much as he hated to admit it, Windu was right about one thing. Teamwork was the only way. If he tried to kill the demon on his own, he'd fail. His vision had shown him that. Then he had an idea. "Skywalker, I'll circle around and you...." As Anakin pulled out his blaster, aiming it toward the second story shelving just above the Treadwell's location, Windu snapped, "What are you doing?" "Master Windu, you said it yourself. Flush him out, of course." He smiled, confident that it would work. "Watch." Before he could protest, Anakin fired several shots into the boards and the supporting struts of the platform above the automaton. There was a loud groan as the metal vaporized. Equipment on the shelving began to topple forward, plunging down in a shower of wrecked parts and melted plasticreet and bits of smoldering wood onto the floor at the far end of the barn. "So the pet has claws." The voice was unruffled, almost amused. "I've enjoyed this little game but enough of play." The Force was growing more polluted by the moment, clogging with ice and corruption, being warped into something so noxious that it sent shivers down Anakin's back. He could feel its energy being pulled toward the killer, twisting into new configurations of poison and power, roiling in the black. There was a taste of lightning in the air. Half-shredded wooden boards and the smashed hulk that had been the Treadwell began to rise, higher and higher into the gloom. Out of the darkness, a black-gloved hand opened its palm and then pointed straight at them both. The wreckage hurtled toward them. "Time to die." -----signature----- Betrayal - http://boards.theforce.net/s/b1/10935143 updated 9/22/08 Fragments of Illusion- http://boards.theforce.net/bts/b10475/28456473 updated 8/16/08 Freeze frame - http://boards.theforce.net/s/b10476/27820434 Master to jedidas3 Impeach Bush!
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Valairy_Scot Title: PT Rewrite Winner Registered: Sep '05	Date Posted: 5/21 3:25pm Subject: RE: Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 5/21/08
	By all that is the Force - wow! Shades of facing Dooku at Obi-Wan's side in AoTC. -----signature----- http://boards.theforce.net/fan_fiction_resource/b10304/25405090/p3/?52 Prolific Author thread: list & links there. Muse fueled by coffee. Often AWOL despite frequent sipping. Writes on inspiration, not a schedule. Proud master of several padawans
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Jedi_Perigrine Registered: Apr '08	Date Posted: 5/21 4:20pm Subject: RE: Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 5/21/08
	Super work, Diane! You write so well we really do get sucked into the action. I wanted to stand next to Anakin and run down Maul. Way to capture the anxiety! ....and make me whine for the next episode. Great chapter! -----signature----- TIS Rules. Check out: Soon to be continued: Choices-- http://boards.theforce.net/before_the_saga/b10475/28767048/p1 A Jedi must make a difficult choice when he runs into an old crush Odd Happenings: http://boards.theforce.net/Message.aspx?topic=29123443&
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Musing Registered: Oct '03	Date Posted: 5/21 6:18pm Subject: RE: Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 5/21/08
	Wooo!!!! Mace and Anakin agreeing to work together...but they're not working too well, are they? They sure are a fun pair. Too bad it takes a Sith to get them to see even marginally eye to eye. I do hope they both survive the encounter so they have more confrontations. Great job, dianethx!
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Jinngerbread Registered: Sep '07	Date Posted: 5/21 6:21pm Subject: RE: Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 5/21/08
	The Force was growing more polluted by the moment, clogging with ice and corruption, being warped into something so noxious that it sent shivers down Anakin's back. He could feel its energy being pulled toward the killer, twisting into new configurations of poison and power, roiling in the black. There was a taste of lightning in the air. Half-shredded wooden boards and the smashed hulk that had been the Treadwell began to rise, higher and higher into the gloom. Out of the darkness, a black-gloved hand opened its palm and then pointed straight at them both. The wreckage hurtled toward them. "Time to die." Argh, that's a terrible place to end, I'm biting my nails here! That last line was just really really creepy, to imagine coming from Maul. -----signature----- Into Another Day http://boards.theforce.net/before_the_saga/b10475/27926050/p1/?5 I Really Need A New Job http://boards.theforce.net/before_the_saga/b10475/28912460/p1/?1 Gate Crashin' http://boards.theforce.net/before_the_saga/b10475/28492848/p1/?21
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PadawanKitara Registered: Dec '01	Date Posted: 5/21 7:57pm Subject: RE: Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 5/21/08
	There is a chance Anakin might actually not rush ahead this time? I'll believe it when I see it. -----signature----- Courtier of the Royal Order of Shambling Dufi We are Dufi...Resistance is Futile! UCLA BRUINS
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GunraysLawyer Registered: May '03	Date Posted: 5/21 8:18pm Subject: RE: Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 5/21/08 - Date Edited: 5/22 3:43pm (1 edits total) Edited By: GunraysLawyer
	Wonderful, Diane, just wonderful. EDIT: No, it deserves more of a comment than that... I love the interplay between Anakin and Windu. The overwrought angst ready teenager and the 'wise' Jedi with no real idea how to deal with him. Now, given a scene from long ago involving Qui-Gon's arrest and a method that Anakin used to resist, I will be very interested to see Anakin's reaction to teh cloud of flying farm machinery and debris... -----signature----- “Fairy tales don't teach children that monsters exist. Children already know that monsters exist. Fairy tales teach children that monsters can be killed.” G.K. Chesterton To absent friends.... "...But Drummer Hoff fired it off."
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Gkilkenny Registered: Mar '04	Date Posted: 5/21 11:24pm Subject: RE: Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 5/21/08
	Excellent and very exciting. -----signature----- Padawan to p_stotts Peace over anger - honour over hate - Strength over fear. Links to Stories in my Bio. Obi-Wan forever.
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EGKenobi Registered: Apr '05	Date Posted: 5/22 1:14am Subject: RE: Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 5/21/08
	Excellent update. I was wondering when we'd see Mace and Anakin. More please... -----signature----- The Shifting Future: http://boards.theforce.net/Message.aspx?topic=24571153&brd=10476&start=25321338 Event Horizon: http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/24429782/p1/?4 Padawan to Courtney_Solo Jesus Freak
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Magier Registered: Jul '07	Date Posted: 5/22 5:52am Subject: RE: Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 5/21/08
	This is a big test for Anakin, and I think for Windu also. I can sympathize with Anakin, knowing that Le is hurt and maybe dying, but they do need to deal with Maul first. I really hope they can put aside their difference because working together I would think that Mace Windu and and in control Anakin Skywalker would be quite a formidable team. Hopefully, Ben will stay out of the way. -----signature----- No Legacy So Rich : Xan,OC, Obi, Qui (9/28) Seekers, Not Saints: SW/TB crossover (8/12)
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Independence1776 Registered: Feb '06	Date Posted: 5/22 9:42am Subject: RE: Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 5/21/08
	Oh, my word. This chapter is stupendous! Tense, completely in character, and creepy. Your Maul is truly showing why that's his name. I love the Anakin/Mace conflict. They're too alike and too different at the same time to ever really get along. It doesn't help that Anakin is still a teenager and doesn't have the maturity that Windu has. I just hope they really can work together! In the distance, Anakin could see that the weather was worsening, moisture-laden clouds churning, wheeling over the landscape, shrouding the tops of the mountains in darkness. There were stabs of brilliance as lightning skittered across the stone cliffs and down into the valley. Even the trees on either side of the road were whipping in the wind. The storm was going to be a bad one. Gorgeous description. It really makes me want a picture of it (I like storms). Hopefully those cortosis guantlets will give them a little advantage. Half-shredded wooden boards and the smashed hulk that had been the Treadwell began to rise, higher and higher into the gloom. Out of the darkness, a black-gloved hand opened its palm and then pointed straight at them both. The wreckage hurtled toward them. "Time to die." Evil, evil cliffhanger. I can't wait to read the next update! -----signature----- "Independence forever." John Adams Padawan to Luna_Nightshade Fics in bio Mostly lurking at the moment
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wolf_kenobi Registered: Nov '07	Date Posted: 5/22 11:41am Subject: RE: Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 5/21/08
	Wow. That was incredible. You did a fantastic job of characterizing Mace and Anakin, and Maul's taunting was well done. I'm quite worried about the outcome ... at least we know Ben is alive. Phenomenal work! -----signature----- Is God willing to prevent evil but not able? Then he is not omnipotent. Is he able but not willing? Then he is malevolent. Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil? Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God. -Epicurus Proud Vegan
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Ocelotl_Nesto Registered: Oct '04	Date Posted: 5/22 12:51pm Subject: RE: Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 5/21/08
	Fantastic begining to a fine battle. I look forward to the next segment. But having read many of your works I expect we will see more of Kenobi/Jinn next.... either way I am anxious to read more.
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