| Author |
Topic:
Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 6/28/08 and thanks for the noms
|
JediNemesis
Registered:
Mar '03
|
Date Posted:
6/28 3:52pm
Subject:
RE: Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 6/28/08 and thanks for the noms
|
First, as far as the noms are concerned - well done  I know Betrayal has been nommed and won before but, given it's maintained Award-level quality for five years now, I think every new nomination is well deserved
Just something that came to mind reading the last couple of posts: I love how this story is big enough to give every character a moment in the limelight. Mace and Maul, for instance, don't get much attention in the films, and it's great to glimpses of real character in them here. I especially like what you've made of Maul; sick, but weirdly charismatic, too.
And the OCs have really grown. Atel and Le'orath are the shining examples, but Sle'fey and Xacor are incredibly well drawn, too. Even Healer Leabe, who has all of one scene, came across as a three-d personality. That's to name some who've featured recently - I'd hate to have to count up the number of speaking roles in this 'fic, I really would 
I'm guessing the next post is going to be Anakin and Mace taking on Maul. Somehow I don't think it's going to be pretty. It seems nastily plausible that Anakin will overreach himself and end up fighting dark with dark, which would add I don't know what to the explosive mix you've got here.
His conversation with Mace about saving Ben and Le'orath took me straight back to his argument with Obi-Wan in AOTC about saving Padme, particularly with Mace's echo of Obi-Wan's line about duty. You really do have Anakin spot-on. Lots of other people as well, but Anakin's impulsiveness and unthinking heroism really stood out for me.
Excellent work as always. Good luck at the Awards!
-----signature-----
<- Fic in bio <- Before the Saga Best Author 2008! Thanks so much guys! BeTS Best Romance 2008: Spindrift - http://boards.theforce.net/a/b1/28478326 *NEW* Somewhere To Fly - http://boards.theforce.net/a/b1/28898463 + GM & Judge in the Mythology Draft +
|
|
|
Quote Reply |
Active Topic Notification |
Private Message |
Post History
|
DarkAnakinfan
Registered:
Jul '05
|
Date Posted:
6/28 6:49pm
Subject:
RE: Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 6/28/08 and thanks for the noms
|
|
Who can blame Obi-Wan for being so bitter? It is really hard to know how sincere the Council is right now. Also your prior post was just chilling. Maul is just pure evil. I am on the edge of my seat! You have such a devious streak in you. Please add me to your pm list. Your updates snuck by me.
|
|
|
Quote Reply |
Active Topic Notification |
Private Message |
Post History
|
Cole_Kenobi
Registered:
Aug '05
|
Date Posted:
6/28 7:33pm
Subject:
RE: Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 6/28/08 and thanks for the noms
|
Yay. Another update! Truly superb writing. Always a pleasure to read. Loved how the bitterness, and the general feeling from Obi-wan that, he's got nothing left to loose so to speak, even though he does.
Anyhoo, awesome update.
|
|
|
Quote Reply |
Active Topic Notification |
Private Message |
Post History
|
PadawanKitara
Registered:
Dec '01
|
Date Posted:
6/29 4:59pm
Subject:
RE: Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 6/28/08 and thanks for the noms
|
|
I just can't trust them. The only way that Obi-Wan should agree to a council seat is if certain others filled the seats around him
-----signature-----
Courtier of the Royal Order of Shambling Dufi
We are Dufi...Resistance is Futile!
UCLA BRUINS
|
|
|
Quote Reply |
Active Topic Notification |
Private Message |
Post History
|
BrightFeather
Registered:
Nov '05
|
Date Posted:
6/29 9:27pm
Subject:
RE: Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 6/28/08 and thanks for the noms
|
Good update, Diane. Honestly, I'm amazed that you've stuck to this.  I mean, it's been a looong time since you started this story.
-----signature-----
|
|
|
Quote Reply |
Active Topic Notification |
Private Message |
Post History
|
jedidas3
Registered:
Apr '07
|
Date Posted:
6/30 4:27am
Subject:
RE: Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 6/28/08 and thanks for the noms
|
Wow! Such emotion and such anticipation...how do you do it? It only goes to prove what at truly gifted writer you are!
I want to second what others have said regarding your noms...you deserve each and every one of them. I am pulling for you, Master! 
-----signature-----
|
|
|
Quote Reply |
Active Topic Notification |
Private Message |
Post History
|
Jedi_Perigrine
Registered:
Apr '08
|
Date Posted:
6/30 8:47am
Subject:
RE: Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 6/28/08 and thanks for the noms
|
|
Me too, Diane! You're a fantastic author who deserves all the goodness that comes her way. Great update! Great story! GOOD LUCK!
-----signature-----
Look out boards, MamaVader snipped my braid!
Still a Talon!
Visitors+Vacation=Barely any time for writing! WAAH!
|
|
|
Quote Reply |
Active Topic Notification |
Private Message |
Post History
|
Ocelotl_Nesto
Registered:
Oct '04
|
Date Posted:
6/30 9:12am
Subject:
RE: Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 6/28/08 and thanks for the noms
|
Great post... terrible cliffhanger... yikes
I look forward to seeing what Anakin and Mace are doing.
|
|
|
Quote Reply |
Active Topic Notification |
Private Message |
Post History
|
Darth_Leia_6669
Registered:
Apr '03
|
Date Posted:
6/30 12:45pm
Subject:
RE: Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 6/28/08 and thanks for the noms
|
Now, why do you think I'm assuming she's dead?  I just couldn't believe the torture, though I admit it can become necessary... 
I'll have a reply to the new post in a day or two, as soon as I can both read it and get back online! (Yes, sadly, I still have that same problem  )
--later--
6669 
-----signature-----
SOTH: When Worlds Collide http://boards.theforce.net/message.asp?topic=28532068&brd=10476 Chapter 11 up 8-18! Master to Lisbev! "And the worms ate into his brain" -Hey You, Pink Floyd Check my profile for more stories and art!
|
|
|
Quote Reply |
Active Topic Notification |
Private Message |
Post History
|
Independence1776
Registered:
Feb '06
|
Date Posted:
6/30 5:00pm
Subject:
RE: Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 6/28/08 and thanks for the noms
|
Wonderful job showing the tension in the shuttle.
Taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly, Sle'fey settled into ready stance, looking as if he were about to go into battle, even if it was only with words. Looking at Obi-Wan with a steadfast gaze, he said, "Knight Kenobi, when this is done, I would like you to consider accepting an appointment to the Jedi Council. The others and I have discussed this and we would be honored if you would join us." Yes, I would say this is a bad time! And they are definitely manipulating you, Obi-Wan.
Not surprisingly, Sle'fey did not blink at the loathing in Obi-Wan's voice, merely stood there looking down at him. Finally, he shrugged, his paws spread wide in a motion that might be considered contrition. "The Jedi have not been on the right path for some time. It is.... difficult to change overnight." But change you must.
Obi-Wan followed the Bothan's gaze, noticing for the first time just how quickly they were approaching the Senate dome. It swallowed the horizon, looming large, growing closer with every heartbeat. The late afternoon light cast a reddish stain over the building's surface, the color of dried blood. Nice creepy visual.
As the Councilor stepped forward, Qui-Gon said nothing, merely lifted his hands, and Xacor slipped the binders onto his wrists. There was an audible snap and the soft crackle of blue energy began to shimmer around the cuffs, leaping from one to the other, a cruel radiance, shutting off his connection to the Force. Needed, but it's still a problem.
They had arrived at their destination. Eep.
Here, we're at the top of a very long hill on a rollar coaster. I look forward to the journey down. [face_smile]
-----signature-----
 "Independence forever." John Adams Padawan to Luna_Nightshade Fics in bio Ever wondered what would happen if some normal students came to the Temple? Come find out: http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/27996678
|
|
|
Quote Reply |
Active Topic Notification |
Private Message |
Post History
|
Darth_Leia_6669
Registered:
Apr '03
|
Date Posted:
7/2 12:36pm
Subject:
RE: Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 6/28/08 and thanks for the noms
|
Interesting, that Xacor and Sle’fey want Obi-Wan on the council, and I don’t blame him one bit for refusing. But even though they have not proven the most trustworthy beings, I sense that maybe there is a genuine feeling of wanting to make things right with them. Then again, with the twists you like to take, I’m not going to wager on that!
Of course, Qui-Gon is going to face it all with the stoicism that has come to define him throughout this story!
In all, an excellent job!
--later--
6669
-----signature-----
SOTH: When Worlds Collide http://boards.theforce.net/message.asp?topic=28532068&brd=10476 Chapter 11 up 8-18! Master to Lisbev! "And the worms ate into his brain" -Hey You, Pink Floyd Check my profile for more stories and art!
|
|
|
Quote Reply |
Active Topic Notification |
Private Message |
Post History
|
Master_Noi
Registered:
Sep '04
|
Date Posted:
7/2 6:46pm
Subject:
RE: Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 6/28/08 and thanks for the noms
|
I don't trust them either. I felt sorry for Atel though. She wants everything to be all right again and I could see how hopeful she was that Obi-Wan would accept.
You are killing me with the anticipation, you know. So many loose ends. I hope this doesn't go as bad as it could.
-----signature-----
For Such a Time as This ( 08/16/08)
A Shrouded Path (07/20/08)
|
|
|
Quote Reply |
Active Topic Notification |
Private Message |
Post History
|
bek
Registered:
Jul '05
|
Date Posted:
7/3 10:39am
Subject:
RE: Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 6/28/08 and thanks for the noms
|
I'm wondering what condition (emotionally and physically) Obi-Wan is going to come out of this confrontation with Palpatine.  And yes, he and Qui-Gon are going to walk away from this - ya hear!  
His trust in the Jedi has been shattered. Is he only going along with this because Qui-Gon is and he feels the need to protect his former master?
I feel for all of them. Atel doesn't want to lose her mentor to the Bendu and yet Obi-Wan can no longer trust the Council and is disgusted by the condition the Order is in. Atel could go with him. I think after she adjusted, she may find the Bendu refreshing after living in the darkness of the Jedi Order for so long. And Qui-Gon is doing his duty as the force directs him to and yet he can't seem to see past that to see how his padawan is hurting. They all need a hug!
Wonderful job with this diane! You really make us feel for the characters and the situations they're in. 
-----signature-----
Update 5/26/08- Chapter 39- Life Beyond the Code (Obi-Wan/Anakin) - http://boards.theforce.net/The_Saga/b10476/20820324 Update 7/11/08- Chapter 24 - Not Myself - (Obi-Wan/Qui-Gon/Oc's) - Before the Saga 6/5- Part 5 - Strength to Begin Ane
|
|
|
Quote Reply |
Active Topic Notification |
Private Message |
Post History
|
Healer_Leona
Registered:
Jul '00
|
Date Posted:
7/3 1:58pm
Subject:
RE: Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 6/28/08 and thanks for the noms
|
He felt defeat settle into his skin.
It's simple lines like the above that really make impress me and make me smile.
Yikes, I know they have to look as real as possible, but I hate that Wui-Gon is vut off from teh Force.
-----signature-----
and i feel them drown my name
so easy to know and forget with this kiss
i'm not afraid to go but it goes so slow
|
|
|
Quote Reply |
Active Topic Notification |
Private Message |
Post History
|
bobafett15
Registered:
Jun '08
|
Date Posted:
7/3 5:45pm
Subject:
RE: Betrayal (Obi/Qui angst - very AU) Updated 6/28/08 and thanks for the noms
|
|
Very interesting, and gripping, but i dont have the patience to read anything that long out of book format, forgive me. NS, though
-----signature-----
Verd ori'shya beskar'gam
a warrior is more than ones armour
my bio page, with full stories list-http://boards.theforce.net/ASP/user.asp?usr=bobafett15
|
|
|
Quote Reply |
Active Topic Notification |
Private Message |
Post History
|
