Jedi Council Forums - One Prick to Bleed - an AU beginning in AotC (Obi, Ani, Sabe, Yoda)

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Author	Topic: One Prick to Bleed - an AU beginning in AotC (Obi, Ani, Sabe, Yoda) - Mar. 1
Senator_Lorena Registered: Oct '03	Date Posted: 6/5/06 6:23am Subject: RE: One Prick to Bleed - an AU beginning in AotC (Obi, Ani, Sabe, Yoda) - June 2
	Welcome back! So glad to see the update! I know it probably would not be in the best interest of the story, but some Sabe and Obi mush would be such instant gratification. This fic is very heavy in dealing with the psychological elements of the characters. I like how you deal with Sabe's struggles. Your handling of Obi-Wan's thoughts is compelling. Your writing of Amidala's conflict with Sabe is dead on. I know your life is busy, but I hope there is not a long stretch between this and the next post! If I do have to wait, I know it will be worth it. ~SL~ -----signature----- "Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars. ~ Less Brown "For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him." ~ John 3:17 NIV
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Obischick Registered: Aug '01	Date Posted: 6/5/06 7:55pm Subject: RE: One Prick to Bleed - an AU beginning in AotC (Obi, Ani, Sabe, Yoda) - June 2
	Wow! Fantastic update! I love the flashback/dream sequence in the beginning. Very interesting idea to show something so realistic and sort of fade it into a dream. I really liked that part... very good beginning. I'm not sure how I feel about the healer guy, he seems nice enough, and as much as I want him to just be nice, I can't help but think that he has some kind of alterior motives for his kindness. But then, I can't quite believe Jedi to use that kind of manipulation. But then I didn't think Yoda could have a secret assasin, and look how you've got me believin that! So essentially: I'm confused about motives. Good work! Liked the interation between Obi and Sabé, very good dialoge. I respect her devotion to duty, but part of me, especially after learning she's going to the wastelands!, wants me to say, eff that. And tell Obi everything. But she's right... it would hurt him to much. God, I love the dynamics of this crazy situation you've created! I thought the descript of Dormé was really interesting. I love how you're able to describe her sort of as a meek person, without saying that outright or making her sound incompetent. Loved Sabé's jolt when she sees her. OH! That confrontation was worth the wait! Loved how crazy Padmé was acting. I think Sabé is right, that Padmé is blaming her own problems on Sabé and calling them Sabé's problems. Also love how Amidala is concieted enough to think that Sabé's still bitter over what happened between them. That tells me that Amidala is still thinking about it. Veeeery interesting. I love how you take a completely different side of Padme, and what Obi-Wan thinks of the marriage. Also Sabé's last question about Anakin. Very interesting. And where is that crazy Anakin?? Something tells me he's up to no good with Palpatine. ~Obischick~ -----signature----- @^_^@ "So one half of you wants to get drunk, and the other half doesn't want to pay for it! -Jay Laga'aia to Ray Park on his half Scottish, half British heratige ~~**~~ "It's nice in a completly bizzare way." -Carrie Fisher on Star Wars
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Amidolee Registered: Jan '00	Date Posted: 6/12/06 4:30pm Subject: RE: One Prick to Bleed - an AU beginning in AotC (Obi, Ani, Sabe, Yoda) - June 2
	Hey, everyone! I've been meaning to respond for the past week or so, but life's been busy and I've been sick. Geh to DRL. Just letting you know that the next post might not come until after June 30th, because that's when I take the GRE, and I really need to study up for this. Obischick - Glad you liked the memory-to-dream sequence, that nearly got cut! I think you're the second one to be suspicious of Dolin. There's nothing nefarious about him; he's a remnant of a bunny I had and is primarily a sort-of friend for Sabe at the Temple. Ha, good to hear the craziness is working for you! And, yes, Anakin's chumming with Palps. Senator Lorena – lol at the need for Obi/Sabe mush. Um, I’ll get back to you on that. ;-) VaderLVR64 – Hee, isn’t Obi wonderful? Glad you enjoyed the post, and hopefully I’ll have the next one up in better time. bobilll – Hee, I couldn’t help the LotR quote. I’m shameless, I know. I like how you put the whole Sabe and Amidala issue with Sabe seeming so archaic to the other. Lol, I think it’d take Ami a looooong time to warm up to her again, however. MasterSareBabe – Poor Dolin, no one trusts him! :_( PadawanKitara – I love it when readers get violent! AngelQueen – Yeah, it’s always bugged me that Amidala would even open the door for Anakin to go back on the Jedi. Of course, by the end of AotC, I wasn’t exactly pleased with her behavior. sigh -----signature----- Mar. 1 - One Prick to Bleed: http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/20423905/p1 "You're like a walking encyclopedia of weirdness." Dean to Sam in Roadkill.
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MasterSareBabe Registered: Dec '04	Date Posted: 8/13/06 3:45pm Subject: RE: One Prick to Bleed - an AU beginning in AotC (Obi, Ani, Sabe, Yoda) - June 2
	Keep updating, or I will die! Haha...not, it's not that dramatic, but this is one of my favorite fanfics of all time--and that is saying something. Please keep going with this!
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cutemara Registered: Jun '05	Date Posted: 8/22/06 4:47pm Subject: RE: One Prick to Bleed - an AU beginning in AotC (Obi, Ani, Sabe, Yoda) - June 2
	nods This is one of my favourite fics too. I really hope you continue it!
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Amidolee Registered: Jan '00	Date Posted: 8/26/06 6:15pm Subject: RE: One Prick to Bleed - an AU beginning in AotC (Obi, Ani, Sabe, Yoda) - June 2
	Sorry, guys. I haven't given up or anything, I've actually got 3 different Chapter 18 starts on the computer, it's just that when I do get settled to write, everything is coming out fatally bad or boring. Maybe the start of term will rejuvenate my brain or something without bogging me down with too much work (ha!). I don't want to go on official hiatus, because then it would be too easy for me to just let it slide away, and I definitely hate the idea of an unfinished fic (it always pained me the few I couldn't finish). But I really do not have an estimate for anyone. -----signature----- Mar. 1 - One Prick to Bleed: http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/20423905/p1 "You're like a walking encyclopedia of weirdness." Dean to Sam in Roadkill.
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Calamity Jinn Registered: May '00	Date Posted: 1/10/07 2:12pm Subject: RE: One Prick to Bleed - an AU beginning in AotC (Obi, Ani, Sabe, Yoda) - June 2
	Hi. Thought I'd bring this back up in the hope of getting another post. I love this story and am desperately looking for the next bit. Anything I can do to help your muse respond, let me know! -----signature----- Check out our website for "The Jemmiah Chronicles"; http://www.hellschancecantina.com
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bobilll Registered: Aug '02	Date Posted: 1/10/07 6:59pm Subject: RE: One Prick to Bleed - an AU beginning in AotC (Obi, Ani, Sabe, Yoda) - June 2
	Wah, fic no die! It'd be sad if fic dies cuz then we'd all be left wondering way too much... I hope your DRL gets better! -----signature----- You'll have to buy him a sweater.
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noahsark418 Registered: Nov '06	Date Posted: 1/12/07 8:17pm Subject: RE: One Prick to Bleed - an AU beginning in AotC (Obi, Ani, Sabe, Yoda) - June 2
	Please don't let this fiction die! I just started reading it this month and have fallen in love with the story line. I can't wait to see what happens next.
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DarthSilious Registered: Nov '06	Date Posted: 1/20/07 10:17am Subject: RE: One Prick to Bleed - an AU beginning in AotC (Obi, Ani, Sabe, Yoda) - June 2
	noahsark418 posted: Please don't let this fiction die! I just started reading it this month and have fallen in love with the story line. I can't wait to see what happens next. I agree wholeheartedly! I really want to see where this story is going. Any chance of ebing added to the PM update list should there be any further updates? Just noticed - this is my 50th post. -----signature----- My SW Fanfic, Choosing a Path to Follow:- http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/26017151/p1/?73 My Model Railway Website:- http://www.shaunsmodelrailway.net The Sheppey Pirates Website:- http://www.sheppeypirates.org
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Miana Kenobi Title: Pacific RSA & NSWFF Mod On Limited Time Registered: Apr '00	Date Posted: 4/22/07 5:11pm Subject: RE: One Prick to Bleed - an AU beginning in AotC (Obi, Ani, Sabe, Yoda) - June 2
	Tsk tsk, letting this fall so far! Any news on an update for this?? -----signature----- President of San Diego FanForce He tini nga whetu e ngaro I te kapua iti. Dyslexics of the world, UNTIE!
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Amidolee Registered: Jan '00	Date Posted: 2/3/08 3:25pm Subject: RE: One Prick to Bleed - an AU beginning in AotC (Obi, Ani, Sabe, Yoda) - Feb. 3
	::shouts to the void:: Hellooooo?! hellooo ... ooo ... So ... I can't believe it's been a year and a half since I've posted! Well, I can a little. My OPtB folder on my laptop has 4 different Chapter 18's that just never got very far, read horribly, etc. I wanted to get further on with the story before posting more, but then I got rather sidelined by, oh, demotivation, self-deprecation, and DRL. However, I've slowly started to pick at this again, and I hesitated at posting because I didn't want to get readers' hopes up and then disappear again. But I'm making a contract with myself to finish this, and if I don't start posting, it's basically signing the bloody thing. So here goes! This first entry is a year and half old! Chapter Eighteen Obi-Wan had been in many a wilderness storm on over dozens of planets, always somehow managing to balance in torrents of howling wind and screaming rain, ice, dust, insects, anything and everything. Walking the lower canyon levels of Coruscant felt a bit riskier, though much homier and preferable to traversing horrendous planetary elements. If he allowed some folly, he would admit to enjoying the clandestine, unorthodox outings into the labyrinthine dregs of the capital planet. Tonight, however, he strode through narrow, twisting gangways and near-tunnels, feeling weary, chilled, and altogether beaten by the turbulent winds. The Jedi Knight, senses full alert, knew the derelict alcove he casually passed was presently empty. It did not disappoint, nor did it fill him with relief. He forced his mind and emotions to remain clear and empty for this. Anticipation, any sort of predisposition, could be disastrous. He did not know. Yet even as his footsteps took him past the shadowed place of no address but he and Anakin knew in all familiarity, Obi-Wan could not deny his quickened pulse. The message. Anakin wanted to meet him here. For what, he did not know, but Obi-Wan was astute enough to know this was absolutely clandestine. He meditated before coming. Obi-Wan did not bring anything with him but himself. Not the Council or the Order or tenuous mastership. Just Obi-Wan. He would hear Anakin out, whatever it was, and take things from there. If he could take anything at all. A faint prickling in the Force urged him to amble back to the alcove. Vacant, but he sensed not for long. The shadows, symbiotic creatures in the variant glow of Coruscant night, closed around him. Another canyon opened up before the Jedi as he came to the slashed lines of scaffolding overlooking a forgotten speeder passage. Sheer whistling wind obscured any sounds of approach, but Obi-Wan knew no sound would be made, anyway. He turned when the prickle sharpened. A darker shadow undulated from the narrow alcove. Obi-Wan shivered inwardly. Walking here, Anakin and Padawan had been synonymous. He could not experience the embodiment of one word without the other. But then Anakin seemed to form out of the night, and it was Anakin, every vibration in the Force, every shadowed feature kept distant from Obi-Wan, everything said, Yes, this is Anakin. But nothing said, and he is your Padawan. The severance wasn’t even painful; it simply was. Blunt and direct. “Anakin.” “Obi-Wan.” Not a greeting, not a challenge. Obi-Wan could not look away from the cold, shadowed face of the young man, but it burned his eyes, urging them to examine the rotting structure encasing them. Then his gaze fastened on something concrete. The Padawan braid—it was gone. “You deserve to be told,” said Anakin. So calm, so hard. “I won’t explain it to you or make excuses, but—” He paused, and here Obi-Wan expected those once boyish eyes to shift, the sheepish mouth to quirk. They did not. Anakin stared directly at him, more solid than the steel beams criss-crossing in the dark above them. “You deserve to be told.” Obi-Wan waited. Clear and empty he must remain, but everything waited on tenterhooks. “Our destinies lie elsewhere,” Anakin said, taking the single stride to the alcove’s edge. The myriad glow of city lights outlined his profile in iridescent blue. “My Jedi training has taken me to this turn in my path. The Order is no longer part of it. I have not,” here he seemed to hold up a finger without twitching a muscle, shifting his stance, “revoked the Force or my teachings. I am not to be a Jedi, Obi-Wan. Not like you, not like any of the Order.” The silence was edged with the distant, broken whine of a dilapidated speeder some hundred meters above them. When it faded away, Anakin allowed a small, shadowed smile. “I appreciate your silence. I will not forget it.” He pulled his hood up, a movement so smooth and thick, he seemed made of black oil. “Good-bye, Obi-Wan. Perhaps our paths with cross again, perhaps not. May the Force me with you.” “And you . . .” The darkness had already swallowed Anakin again, leaving Obi-Wan alone and speaking to the wind. -----signature----- Mar. 1 - One Prick to Bleed: http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/20423905/p1 "You're like a walking encyclopedia of weirdness." Dean to Sam in Roadkill.
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Obischick Registered: Aug '01	Date Posted: 2/3/08 4:35pm Subject: RE: One Prick to Bleed - an AU beginning in AotC (Obi, Ani, Sabe, Yoda) - June 2
	Wow... I had forgotten how much I love this fic! I'm so glad you're back and that you're finishing!! I really liked the little bit here, the description of Anakin as black oil was just... chilling. Can't wait to see what you have up your sleeve next! ~Obischick~ -----signature----- @^_^@ "So one half of you wants to get drunk, and the other half doesn't want to pay for it! -Jay Laga'aia to Ray Park on his half Scottish, half British heratige ~~**~~ "It's nice in a completly bizzare way." -Carrie Fisher on Star Wars
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Miana Kenobi Title: Pacific RSA & NSWFF Mod On Limited Time Registered: Apr '00	Date Posted: 2/3/08 8:17pm Subject: RE: One Prick to Bleed - an AU beginning in AotC (Obi, Ani, Sabe, Yoda) - June 2
	YAYs! So glad you decided to finish this, hun! -----signature----- President of San Diego FanForce He tini nga whetu e ngaro I te kapua iti. Dyslexics of the world, UNTIE!
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Amidolee Registered: Jan '00	Date Posted: 2/4/08 5:04pm Subject: RE: One Prick to Bleed - an AU beginning in AotC (Obi, Ani, Sabe, Yoda) - Feb. 4
	Readers came back! Ok, I can't promise any sort of scheduled posting rate, but I'll give you another because I'm all excited! There was nothing left to do. She’d been here before. Sabé’s eyes were closed. The non-color of the chambers walls were meant to be soothing, she knew, because they eliminated the physical place, became nonexistent so minds could travel beyond … But she did see. The leaves, the sunlight on the lake water, the invisible stirrings in the air, in the Force … they were all lined in silver-green, all one essence, only divided in the eye. Cleaned, recycled air filled her lungs in a long breath, but it came from the crisp mountain air across the galaxy. There was nothing left to do but breathe it in, fill her cells, and then exhale, giving it to the leaves, and then returning to the air. She was not here to find peace or an answer. As she sat cross-legged on the chamber floor and stood barefoot on the stone balcony overlooking the lake, she simply existed to breathe through this place of nothing. A mute point, a sliver, in existence. She didn’t need to turn her head to catch the flash of silver as she took aim at her target; she did not see it, but knew it was possible that she woke calmly, no longer a handmaiden, and faced the new nothingness, nodded, and then stepped onto another path. It was possible, once. A figure, so like her but wholly someone else, stood silently under the arched entryway of the villa. Another, lost along the knoll, gazing away over the water, had appeared before the other, but there was no real time here to measure his arrival. Maybe he had always been there. The third stood in the shadows behind the first, absorbing the silver-green sheen into further shadow. The fourth she could not see and knew she would not even if she searched. Perhaps she never should have sought him out. If she sought peace or resolution, the figure behind her would have shifted through the shimmer, through the breeze dancing over the water. But that was an illusion, and this was not. Sabé closed her eyes there, here. Breathe deep, without effort. She didn’t need effort when there was nothing left to do. Well, just one thing. The figures shimmered and stilled. They faded, but she could not witness the change from being there to … not. They were still there, she sensed it in the silver-green sheen, but her focus fell to something less ethereal, something tangible, blunt. Words, concepts, oaths … they faded and shimmered like the figures, and she felt the one thing. It was not “right” or “wrong” but a must. It felt solid, draped over her shoulder, and she could see the path form before her, stretching up the knoll into the whispering trees. It was narrow and short, with an outcome that would not shatter. The Force did not need to tell her. ~~~ “You’re certain.” Razak nodded. A short, curt dip of a horned chin. He never wasted energy, unless he was phasing. Then he had a flare Count Dooku found tiresome and certainly unnecessary in a fight. The Sith Lord folded his hands behind his back in contemplation. Good, he thought, letting Razak stand in silence. The Balzantar’s information was always as accurate as his mark. The enterprising creature seemed to have his claws everywhere, yet Dooku had never found any trace of how. Torture would probably out, but Razak would be useless after that. When he ceased to be useful or became a little too enterprising … well, then he would die. Dooku stared over Razak’s hide-armored shoulder into the lighted pulse of Coruscant. He’d just been handed a wild card and a worrisome bid. A lesser man would have considered the information a gift, a sign the Dark side had chosen him to inherit the greatness that was to come. But he was not a fool. Yet fools had just as much if not more of an effect on the Force. The assassin would be in his hands. The possibilities … The sun would be glaring off the skyscrapers before he finished thinking of all the possibilities of this jewel in his hands. How far could he play her against the Skywalker problem? Or should he save her for something more subtle? He hated repeating himself, but Dooku turned his voice, not his gaze, to Razak. “You encountered the assassin before.” “She tracked and killed Jedi hunters.” “You did not try to kill her in turn.” “Our paths were not to cross on that day.” Dooku frowned. He wondered what day and where that had been. He could guess, of course, but it did not matter. Another creature would have needed further prompting, but Razak, his lean, muscular stature at attention, continued. “Skilled. I could not tell if she was superbly trained or skilled,” said Razak. His glittering orange eyes narrowed. On the whole, Dooku did not feel that Mabriee’s aptitude in the Force mattered. She could play on so many levels. Politically and emotionally with Senator Amidala, emotionally with Skywalker, and, Dooku felt certain even without Razak’s report, she was connected to the Jedi Temple. Deeply connected. The former Jedi had known about the Shadows and special “assistants” that had passed unseen through the Temple. If Mabriee indeed served a high-ranking Jedi Master, then which one? Windu was a little too direct, or—and Dooku doubted it—he was a tremendous actor. Oh, but how wonderful Yoda would be. Messing so deeply when he portrayed such a cautious, inactive counsel. He could entertain himself for hours thinking of whom on the Council, or even a lower-ranked but intelligent Master, had adopted this silent deed. Or, he could find out from the source. Then he would know how to play her. And, if he played her right and the Dark side served him well, he would know whether to kill Skywalker or bring him under the Count’s hand. ~~~ Only days ago it would have been important to know how much time had passed while she meditated, but Sabé slowly unfolded her legs and stretched her body with only a vague nod to the fact it did not matter here. Strange, how she was out of time and displaced even now on a physical plane. As her right side curved and her left leg muscles stretched, Sabé focused her eyes on a curved corner and breathed the treated air. Reality approached like a dim lantern across a Gungan bog. She switched sides and huffed slightly, expelling the remnant of the slap and covering the departing swish of a cloak. Those things were gone, did not matter. The weight of her braid warmed her right shoulder, the end dipping to the floor. She straightened her torso and touched the braid, unaware of the sting as she bit her lip. Dolin Ramoul had entered not long after Obi-Wan and the senator left. What he did or said, she couldn’t really remember, she had not been lucid. Had she cried? Retched? Screamed? Or had she stood motionless? She couldn’t remember; it didn’t matter. He had touched her cheek, his touch warm but not golden, not how it should be—she remembered thinking that. Genuine but clinical, not something almost … raw, personal, like it had meaning. Sabé rolled her head along her shoulders. No, she would not think about that. There was no point, nothing to do there. He left. You will say nothing … nor will I. Turning to stone against the pain was tempting, but she did not have energy for it. She had to reserve herself. That much she pulled from Dolin’s visit. She stood up, locked her fingers, and then stretched her arms high over her head, the thick braid pressing against her neck. The healer had informed her a Naboo intelligence officer would be dispatched to transport her to the wastelands. “Orzkal, I believe the name was,” Dolin had said somewhere in that blur. Saché. The former handmaiden’s abdomen contracted. Although it was logical the Senator would choose her former handmaiden and intelligence head for discretion over this delicate matter, Sabé suspected the selection was not coincidental. No, this was adding insult to an injury lost in a vacuum. It hurt, but it felt like a necessary, purposeful pain. She had no hope in it becoming a healing pain, or even a gift; Saché had been sideswiped by this quagmire, and Sabé wanted to rectify it. Not for her own end, because her end was a wall, the wastelands, something she did not care about. Saché’s wound could not be fixed, but it should be respected. Sabé let her arms collapse with gravity. The room spun and she briefly closed her eyes. This one thing, this one purpose that had nothing to do with duty or the Force and everything to do with fact. Then there would be nothing. It would just be her, useless, and probably consumed in her misery. Death would have been a preferable punishment. It would serve its purpose and be over. Before she had become a handmaiden, she had not known what she would become or where she fit in the universe’s scheme, but she knew there was a place somewhere, that she was working toward something. The purpose of finding that purpose … but now she would not even be searching for the path. Just standing at the edge of a field, not looking up to search, because no path was meant for her. The deep ache in her bones had little to do with the meditation. Sabé took a deep breath and shook herself. A faint prickle alerted her to an approaching Jedi, so she turned to face the door, noting her own lack of expectation. The door slid open and Padawan Ropjo looked briefly startled to find her waiting for him. She did not possess the foresight to know exactly when he and Jedi Knight T’lana would come for her, but Sabé sensed a small prick of satisfaction somewhere deep inside to see that flicker across the stoic Padawan’s face. Other than that, all she felt was a calm fixation on the tangible and factual. “Um—” Ropjo’s gray, shallow cheeks tinted slightly. Sabé imagined she felt a stirring of sympathy for the Padawan. The Padawan was no doubt more capable of handling uneasy situations since he was assigned to her, but something about her disturbed him. Perhaps he sensed or suspected there was an underlying side to all this. She could not let him wonder too much on the circumstances; she must flit out of his existence, clear his path. Smiling wouldn’t work, nor could she think of anything to say, so Sabé tried to soothe her own nerves and keep her face reserved and hopefully not stony. Ropjo stepped into the room with a slight dip of his smooth head. “Your escort will arrive shortly,” he said. “Please.” He gestured at the open door, through which Knight T’lana stood with detached authority. So. Sabé nodded once, then reached for her rucksack. Her fingers paused on the sturdy cloth. Obi-Wan had dropped it there. The last connection. It would be gone when she picked it up. Finished. How ludicrous to whisper, “May the Force be with you,” when she picked it up. But she thought it, unable to stop herself. With the rucksack over one shoulder, her braid over the other, Sabé faced the waiting Jedi. -----signature----- Mar. 1 - One Prick to Bleed: http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/20423905/p1 "You're like a walking encyclopedia of weirdness." Dean to Sam in Roadkill.
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