| Author |
Topic:
The Once and Future Sith Lord: Palpatine’s Blog (dark humor) Update: 10/2
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LilyHobbitJedi
Title:
Apples to Apples and 20 Questions hostess
Registered:
Aug '05
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Date Posted:
7/3/07 10:56pm
Subject:
RE: The Once and Future Sith Lord: Palpatine’s Blog (dark humor) Update: 6/6
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You see, pesky queen #2 nominated pesky queen #1 to be the Senator from Naboo.
Take that Palpy! 
Do you see where this is going? They’ve formed a “Loyalist” committee that opposes the Separatists. This is good. It creates division in the senate and they’re all too stupid to see the cracks that I’m driving throughout the foundations of the Republic.
Hm... this is also good because I can kill her off! I know! It’s so exciting! I totally planned it this way.
Sure he did.
Wondcerful update! 
-----signature-----
Proud Master to eboneya & Alassë Eärfalas!  Everybody Lies- House/SW Crossover! http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/28032689/r28039379/ A Light In The Darkness http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b1047
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Handmaiden_Azul
Registered:
Dec '05
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Date Posted:
7/16/07 5:56pm
Subject:
RE: The Once and Future Sith Lord: Palpatine’s Blog (dark humor) Update: 6/6
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This reminds me of a line from Pirates 3. "To you think he plans it all out or just makes it up as he goes along?"
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Jaya Solo
Registered:
Jul '99
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Date Posted:
8/29/07 9:44am
Subject:
RE: The Once and Future Sith Lord: Palpatine’s Blog (dark humor) Update: 6/6
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Layren
So remember that boy? The one born of the Force? Well, I figured out a way to turn him...
See, he has this mom. No, I’m not going to marry her and then be a father to him. So get that idea out of your mind.
Awww but that would be so funny! Not to mention disgusting, I wouldn't wish that on anyone, especially not poor Shmi Being married to Palpatine could you really imagine?
I probably can, but for the sake of you guys, I won't. 
Poor palpatine having to put up with Amidala in the Senate
He deserves it. It'll just make him more evil. He'll like that.
Glad this is back, Jaya! I've really enjoyed it
Thanks! Hopefully I'll make the posts more regularly now.
NYCitygurl
Glad to see you've started this back up!!! Great post
Thanks! 
Tatooine_Ghost
loved it. can not wait for the next post.
Thanks!
VaderLVR64
So glad to see this one updated!
Thanks! Me too. 
So there’s a new pesky queen. That’s okay. At least she hasn’t stopped a blockade and gained the favor of all of her subjects for years to come. But she has done something rather annoying.
You see, pesky queen #2 nominated pesky queen #1 to be the Senator from Naboo.
Do you see where this is going?
Yes... now pesky queen #1 is the pesky Senator from Naboo.
That means she gets to be in the Senate with me.
Goody.
Poor Palpatine!
I feel no pity for him.
KELIA
How wonderful to see "the pesky Senator" getting under Palpatine's skin!
Palpatine deserves if for what he has planned.
I agree!
Great update
Thanks!
Killik_Twilight
'Ole Palps is a sneaky one, ain't he? But he can't get rid of Padmé, hehe.
Nope, she's too pesky.
Sen_Padme_Amidala
Yay for a new reader!  (Also glad to see you like my other stories!)
LOL, Jaya this is to funny!
How wonderful to see "the pesky Senator" getting under Palpatine's skin!
Palpatine deserves if for what he has planned.
Great update
I totally agree with KELIA! You write this so well, and the irony and forshadowing is killing me.
Excellent. Then all is proceeding according to my plan. 
Yeah, I bet Padme is getting on his nerves. she's supose to isn't she?
Yep.
[i]Anyway, great story and I can't wait for another update.
Thanks!
Jaina_Solo_15
As for the other senators... they must be on some kind of spice.
I've said that about many a senator. *claps hand over mouth* And...now's the time I'll shut up about politics.
:: snicker ::
I loved this update, Master. You make Palpy's blog consistently outrageous and funny. I love it.
It's my insane talent!
LilyHobbitJedi
You see, pesky queen #2 nominated pesky queen #1 to be the Senator from Naboo.
Take that Palpy!
Hehe.
Do you see where this is going? They’ve formed a “Loyalist” committee that opposes the Separatists. This is good. It creates division in the senate and they’re all too stupid to see the cracks that I’m driving throughout the foundations of the Republic.
Hm... this is also good because I can kill her off! I know! It’s so exciting! I totally planned it this way.
Sure he did.
 He's fun though, isn't he?
Wondcerful update!
Thanks!
Handmaiden_Azul
This reminds me of a line from Pirates 3. "To you think he plans it all out or just makes it up as he goes along?"
Hehe. He'll always leave you guessing!
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EGKenobi
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Jaya Solo
Registered:
Jul '99
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Date Posted:
8/29/07 9:48am
Subject:
RE: The Once and Future Sith Lord: Palpatine’s Blog (dark humor) Update: 8/29
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Yay! My clones are complete! Now I am fulfilled as a person
Mood: Excited, yet sarcastic
Yes! They are complete! And there's all safely tucked away on some remote planet that I had hid from existence.
Erm... wait...
How are they going to become the Army of the Republic if no one knows about them? How can I start my war to rule the galaxy unless I get my war started.
Drat.
Now what do I do?
Oh, I know! I'll kill the former-queen-now-turned-senator! It's the solution to everything!
Yes... I have the bounty hunter that I had used to make the clones hire another bounty hunter and that second bounty hunter will go after the little annoying imp. The imp's death will trigger a search that will bring the Jedi to the planet where they will discover the clones. While they're being discovered I'll have my apprentice start the war, however he sees fit. He'll like that.
Yes... this seems perfect...
Maybe I'll even kill off the annoying-Jedi who's the master of my next apprentice in the process! That would be perfect.
Ta ta! Evil plotting to do now.
So much to do. So little evil to go around.
-Darth Sidious
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Why do I even try?
Mood: Frustrated 
HOW DOES SHE KEEP DOING IT?
The annoying-former-queen-turned-senator did it again! How does she keep living? It's just not possible! It's inconceivable!
Argh!
So she lived.
Again.
This means I have to involve the stupid Jedi to baby sit her.
Actually... that should be good. I can get my future apprentice and his master to watch her. They'll just annoy each other to death. She never listens to them and they don't respect her. A good way to get them both killed.
Please? 
-Darth I-Wish-She'd-Finally-Die
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It's like she's immortal or something
Mood: Amazed 
She didn't die again. I think I'm going to cry soon. She... she just won't die! Why? 
So this time she survived the disgusting bugs. The good news is that while she didn't die, at least the dumb Jedi now have enough clues to go find the clones. That was part of my plan all along, so that's not a big deal.
The other good news is that the pesky master/padawan team is being broken up. That leaves my future apprentice to woo the pesky girl while his master goes off. He's totally in love with her (you should see how he looks at her, totally throw-up worthy. Gag me.  ) That should be fun to watch. I should totally install a camera to see how badly he flirts with her. Come on now, have you ever heard of a suave Jedi Master? They're too goody-goody to know how to flirt with girls. He'll probably compare her to sand or something since he must think it's sexy since he grew up only seeing sand. Or he'll tell her how much she reminds him of his mom... all too sexy. But who knows, maybe he'll do something stupid like run off with her or knock her up. That'd be funny.
Wait... do I really want the Chosen One having kids? Maybe I should find an apprentice to... fix it so he can't. Yes... that might be a good idea...
Anyway, to make my future apprentice more evil, I'm going to kill off his mom soon. She's being tortured by these ugly, smelly creatures on Tatooine as we speak. That should make him do something reckless.
Maybe the stupid-former-queen-turned-senator will finally die.
-Darth Sidious
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Jaina_Solo_15
Registered:
Dec '02
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Date Posted:
8/29/07 10:22am
Subject:
RE: The Once and Future Sith Lord: Palpatine’s Blog (dark humor) Update: 8/29
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Yay! My clones are complete! Now I am fulfilled as a person
That line still makes me laugh! And was just one of the many that I loved!
I can't wait for you to post more, Jaya dear.
-----signature-----
http://jaina47.livejournal.com/ - Come here for fic teasers & writing news
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Killik_Twilight
Registered:
Apr '05
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Date Posted:
8/29/07 12:54pm
Subject:
RE: The Once and Future Sith Lord: Palpatine’s Blog (dark humor) Update: 8/29
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So much to do. So little evil to go around.
*dies laughing*
As I've said before, I am Greatly Amused™.
KT
-----signature-----
"Those who have long enjoyed such privileges as we enjoy forget in time that
men have died to win them."
Franklin D. Roosevelt
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Darth_Drachonus
Registered:
Oct '05
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Date Posted:
8/29/07 1:16pm
Subject:
RE: The Once and Future Sith Lord: Palpatine’s Blog (dark humor) Update: 8/29
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Nice, add me to the update list please lol
-----signature-----
Don't **** with a Jedi Master son-Luke Skywalker
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geno
Registered:
Jul '07
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Date Posted:
8/29/07 3:44pm
Subject:
RE: The Once and Future Sith Lord: Palpatine’s Blog (dark humor) Update: 8/29
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very interesting
great story and look forward to more
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DreamingIce
Registered:
Aug '05
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Date Posted:
8/29/07 9:50pm
Subject:
RE: The Once and Future Sith Lord: Palpatine’s Blog (dark humor) Update: 8/29
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So much to do. So little evil to go around.
Oh, I'm so glad to see this back up! And Palpy sounds as... sarcastic? Amusing? As before... Actually, I'm getting a vibe that's a cross between an Keith Allan (a la Sheriff of Nottingham in BBC's Robin Hood tv series) and Scar (a la Lion King)
Keep it up, Master
-----signature-----
Crazy padawan of JayaSolo "Do not disturb... Im disturbed enough already"  Canon sucks! Get it away from me! http://boards.theforce.net/fan_fiction_resource/b10304/23417532 ^ The Jacella Index. Sweet Perfection.
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KELIA
Title: Moderator: Fan Fiction
Registered:
Jul '05
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Date Posted:
8/30/07 7:27am
Subject:
RE: The Once and Future Sith Lord: Palpatine’s Blog (dark humor) Update: 8/29
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I'm loving how Padme keeps inadvertently ruining Palpatine's day
Maybe I should find an apprentice to... fix it so he can't
Don't you dare start plotting against Anakin!
Great update
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VaderLVR64
Title: Fan Fic Manager in Combat Boots
Registered:
Feb '04
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Date Posted:
8/30/07 8:01am
Subject:
RE: The Once and Future Sith Lord: Palpatine’s Blog (dark humor) Update: 8/29
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Anyway, to make my future apprentice more evil, I'm going to kill off his mom soon. She's being tortured by these ugly, smelly creatures on Tatooine as we speak. That should make him do something reckless.
Maybe the stupid-former-queen-turned-senator will finally die.
Palpy really is a cranky sort, isn't he?
-----signature-----
If you have to choose between tears and laughter, remember that laughter burns more calories.
Proud New Army Mom - off to bootcamp!
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Tatooine_Ghost
Registered:
Jul '06
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Date Posted:
9/6/07 1:50pm
Subject:
RE: The Once and Future Sith Lord: Palpatine’s Blog (dark humor) Update: 8/29
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loved it. can not wait for the next chapter.
-----signature-----
Where were you when the world stoped turning that one September Day?
WJFC means never having to say you're sorry.
Senator of the Old Jedi Order Fan Club
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NYCitygurl
Title: Railroad Baroness of SFFBC, C&G, and NSWFF
Registered:
Jul '02
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Date Posted:
9/6/07 4:35pm
Subject:
RE: The Once and Future Sith Lord: Palpatine’s Blog (dark humor) Update: 8/29
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Come on now, have you ever heard of a suave Jedi Master? They're too goody-goody to know how to flirt with girls. He'll probably compare her to sand or something since he must think it's sexy since he grew up only seeing sand. Or he'll tell her how much she reminds him of his mom... all too sexy. But who knows, maybe he'll do something stupid like run off with her or knock her up. That'd be funny.
Wait... do I really want the Chosen One having kids? Maybe I should find an apprentice to... fix it so he can't. Yes... that might be a good idea...
I love how he's obsessed with offing Padme
Awesome that you updated again? The Awards: They Suck Your Time
-----signature-----
"We Earth Men have a talent for ruining big, beautiful things." ~ Master of padawanlost, Ultima_1 and Jedimaster_JainaSolo 
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Idrelle_Miocovani
Title: Solar Power loving Scattergories Hostess
Registered:
Feb '05
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Date Posted:
9/6/07 5:49pm
Subject:
RE: The Once and Future Sith Lord: Palpatine’s Blog (dark humor) Update: 8/29
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Jaya, this is HILARIOUS! Pure brilliance -- just the right thing to put me in a good mood while I mull over my homework!
Could I be added to the PM list, please? 
-----signature-----
"He said, 'Don't die under my command, you're enough of a pain without the paperwork.' That was it."
"Tell him, 'Fine, there's no way I'm dying before you do, you morally bankrupt Colonel with a God complex.'"
Padawan of DarthIshtar
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Handmaiden_Azul
Registered:
Dec '05
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Date Posted:
9/8/07 5:28pm
Subject:
RE: The Once and Future Sith Lord: Palpatine’s Blog (dark humor) Update: 8/29
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Is he plotting to castrate Anakin? *is trying to figure out if it would be funny or a tragedy*
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