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Author	Topic: In Plain Sight: Luke's Story -- ANH AU - complete -- Thanks for your support in the Awards!
SITHTIFF Registered: Aug '06	Date Posted: 4/22/07 11:55am Subject: RE: In Plain Sight: Luke’s Story – ANH AU – Luke/Vader/Palpatine/Mara/OCs – short story--Update 4/21 - Date Edited: 4/22/07 12:02pm (1 edits total) Edited By: SITHTIFF
	This such a great fic!!!! I have to agree with the rest who found Solo to be cold and creepy. However, her resentment toward Luke is rather plausable. I do like what you have done with the characters Luke and Mara. The emperor and Vader are dark and menacing still...but you have added a darker quality to them...at least from the little blips I have seen so far. Anyway,I am eager to see how this turns out. Btw...is Leia the "nothing?" Add me to your PM list please Thanks -----signature----- A Smith is a Sith in hiding.
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VaderLVR64 Title: Manager Emeritus Registered: Feb '04	Date Posted: 4/22/07 2:59pm Subject: RE: In Plain Sight: Luke’s Story – ANH AU – Luke/Vader/Palpatine/Mara/OCs – short story--Update 4/21
	The Countess Claria was a perfect lady. Gracious, poised, intelligent, she always acted with flawless etiquette and still managed to put one at ease. Her appearance was never anything but correct, every hair in place, every shoulder-sculp straight. Her voice was mild and her posture exquisite. Mara Jade was heartily sick of Countess Claria. That's our Mara all right! Another superb update! -----signature----- R.I.P John, Alex, Jason, and Christian Never forgotten Soldiers' Angels http://soldiersangels.org/ 2114 soldiers waiting for someone to care
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leia_naberrie Registered: Sep '02	Date Posted: 4/23/07 1:07am Subject: RE: In Plain Sight: Luke’s Story – ANH AU – Luke/Vader/Palpatine/Mara/OCs – short story--Update 4/21
	I read this in one sitting. I think this story is fantastic - original idea and marvellous execution. Please put me on the PM list if you have one. Thanks! -----signature----- http://io9.com/5111680/avatar-casting-makes-fans-see-white Upset about the casting for the Last Airbender movies? Write to Paramount about it. http://aang-aint-white.livejournal.com/1007.html
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tasujad Registered: Jun '05	Date Posted: 4/23/07 2:21am Subject: RE: In Plain Sight: Luke’s Story – ANH AU – Luke/Vader/Palpatine/Mara/OCs – short story--Update 4/21 - Date Edited: 4/23/07 2:24am (1 edits total) Edited By: tasujad
	you have created very exiting scenery and very interesting characters and the pace is so painfully and enjoyably slow Could you please wrote Luke's interview a longer , i would sooooo much like to read the dynamics of two strong and witty character so could you put me in to the PM list please -----signature----- The force is ALWAYS with me * *well almost always - i hope
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KELIA Title: The Pretty in Pink Fan Fic Manager Registered: Jul '05	Date Posted: 4/23/07 5:35am Subject: RE: In Plain Sight: Luke’s Story – ANH AU – Luke/Vader/Palpatine/Mara/OCs – short story--Update 4/21
	Wonderful job capturing Mara's character. How very interesting she may be sponsoring a brat herself. Great update -----signature----- "Do or do not, there is no try." Master Yoda A Light In The Darkness: http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/28150602/p1/?8 NaNaWriMo Progress: 11,018
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David_Skywalker01 Registered: Nov '06	Date Posted: 4/23/07 4:51pm Subject: RE: In Plain Sight: Luke’s Story – ANH AU – Luke/Vader/Palpatine/Mara/OCs – short story--Update 4/21
	Great update it is so well writen! Thanks for the PM and I can't wait for the next update! -----signature----- "A blind man should not lead a blind man or they will both fall into a hole." - Jesus IndyCar- One series, All the stars http://www.freewebs.com/therebelallianceofstarwarsgeeks - my website Worst EU people- Jacen Solo, ANY Yuuzhan Vong, Ashoka
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JediVegeta Registered: Dec '00	Date Posted: 4/24/07 4:24am Subject: RE: In Plain Sight: Luke’s Story – ANH AU – Luke/Vader/Palpatine/Mara/OCs – short story--Update 4/21
	Hee hee. Mara. I was wondering if she would punch him, knock him out and throw him in a fountain or something. Looking forward to her character arc. And Luke feeling the power of the force and not being trained with a psycho mad man laughing it up in the darkness...not a good combination, obviously. Sort of worried for him, yet, I really want to see what is going to happen. Well, not an amazing review, but just saying great job and make the next post soon as you can. And don't get burned out in the process! -----signature----- JOIN THE MUFFIN SIDE DEXTER!!!! Igiari!!!! That's the playful side of Torgo. He's the clown that makes the dark side fun.
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petra_delling Registered: Apr '04	Date Posted: 4/24/07 5:46pm Subject: RE: In Plain Sight: Luke’s Story – ANH AU – Luke/Vader/Palpatine/Mara/OCs – short story--Update 4/21
	I love your story. Will you add me to the PM list please? -----signature----- "The force is with you young Skywalker, but you are not a Jedi yet."
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PadawanMom5610 Registered: Feb '07	Date Posted: 4/24/07 7:17pm Subject: RE: In Plain Sight: Luke’s Story – ANH AU – Luke/Vader/Palpatine/Mara/OCs – short story--Update 4/21
	Wow, this story is really intriguing. My heart breaks for Luke. Sola's attitude toward him was very much how I imagine Owen's was. Interesting that he's turned inward in this story, rather than looking outward, to escape his situation. I'm glad Mara's there. She will definitely spice up Luke's life. And what will happen when Palpatine sees Luke? Please add me to your PM list.
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furrylittlebantha Registered: Dec '05	Date Posted: 4/26/07 4:56pm Subject: RE: In Plain Sight: Luke’s Story – ANH AU – Luke/Vader/Palpatine/Mara/OCs – short story--Update 4/21
	Jade_Pilot: Wow, thank you! I'm glad you approve of the characterizations. I've been a little nervous about everything, since it's so AU, and it's wonderful to get feedback. I'm wondering if L/M will meet up. Hmmmm... G_Anakin: Thanks! Sure, I'll PM you. RedGold: divapilot: You're heartily welcome! At first, I was going to leave Luke with the Organas, but then it occured to me that the Naberries were right there too. You betcha something evil cometh!! Buhahaha... ginchy: It's pulling at him, and at somebody else, too... I guess we'll just have to wait and see which way he goes. Thank you for reading and replying! Jade_eyes: No kidding. As soon as I read Allegience, I was like, "dang. Gotta use Countess Claria!" She is majorly cool. Glad you like Melgida; she's the major OC in this story. BrentusofGath: Heehee! If he pushed her too hard, she would, I'm sure. Treason? What treason? My lips are sealed. Glad you liked the bit with Palps; that was fun to write. JEDIFLYSWATTER: Awesome username. I wonder if that was Mara that Luke's friend saw. Palpatine must feel something going on in the Force with Luke so close. whistles Yuppers about Sola. Can't she see how cute he is? Anakinfan2006: i cant wait to read when vader found out that luke is his son. or that when mara and luke meet first time. will it be love at first sight ? whistles some more StarFighter5: Luke and Mara will meet. That's all I can confirm or deny. SITHTIFF: Thank you! However, her resentment toward Luke is rather plausable And thank you especially for that. I was trying not to make her too stereotypical. Glad you're reading! VaderLVR64: The Mara we know and love. Thank you! leia_naberrie: One sitting? Wow. I'm flattered. Thank you! I'll definitely add you to the PM list. P.S. You know, your username is singularly appropriate... tasujad: Hope it's not going too slow... Fraid the interview's not going to be in there, but don't worry. There'll be more Melgida/Luke/Mara interaction in the future. Consider yourself added to the PM list! KELIA: Thank you! I love Mara uber much. Heehee, good point. Thanks! David_Skywalker01: You're absolutely welcome! I'm glad you're liking this. JediVegeta: Any update is an amazing one. And Luke feeling the power of the force and not being trained with a psycho mad man laughing it up in the darkness...not a good combination, obviously. Yup. I'll try not to get burned out, and honestly I don't see that happening. I'm so into this plot, it just writes itself! Five chapters ahead already...I feel virtuous. petra_delling: Thanks! I'll add you to the PM list. petra...an Orson Scott Card fan, by any chance? PadawanMom5601: Poor Lukie. Never gets a break. Interesting, that parallel you draw between Sola and Owen. I hadn't really thought about it that way. Yes, he's very much turned in instead of out, and it will affect how he deals with stuff... And what will happen when Palpatine sees Luke? Hehehe.... The PM list is as follows: Ginchy JediVegeta Brentus Jade_eyes MsLanna DarthVaderette David_Skywalker01 cooldamien KELIA Jade_Pilot MirandaFair VaderLVR64 RedGold divapilot G_Anakin JEDIFLYSWATTER SITHTIFF leia_naberrie tasujad petra_delling PadawanMom5610 If you ever want to be taken off, just let me know! Next update should be this Sat, or tonight, if I have time... -----signature----- Master of tjace and bi0nic. In mourning for the one year, nine months, and five days it has been since The Souls of Demons was updated. sob
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furrylittlebantha Registered: Dec '05	Date Posted: 4/26/07 5:07pm Subject: RE: In Plain Sight: Luke’s Story – ANH AU, Luke/Vader/Palpatine/Mara/OCs –short story--Update 4/26!
	Chapter 3 ============ “You look good, kid.” Luke brushed self-consciously at his slicked-back hair. “Thanks,” he mumbled. “Senator…” “Kid. You look great. What else matters? I promise you, you’ll do fine up there. More than fine.” She flashed him a strange, almost predatory grin. “You’ll do brilliant.” The senator swished ahead of him then, and Luke had to trot to keep pace. Brilliant, she said. How did she know? He’d been her intern for only two weeks now, and try as he might, Luke couldn’t recall a single incident that would have given her the impression that…that… Oh, shavit. “How” wasn’t the only question he harbored about Twansa Melgida. Why me and who is she and what the heck have I gotten myself into figured pretty prominently, too. A few of the questions had been answered. Between the endless busywork she gave him (all observed, he was sure) and the few, cryptic conversations they shared, he had found opportunity to do some observation of his own. The problem was, every answer invariably sprouted a dozen more questions. She wanted him for something, that was for sure. That first week had been the test. No, it was even earlier—the interview. The path of her questioning seemed random to him then, but later, he realized it was like the puzzles he used to work on rainy days. Nothing was disordered or purposeless when you had the picture of how things were going to turn out. Melgida was running him through a maze in that interview, watching to see if he fit her pattern. And apparently, he did. No words had been exchanged, but Luke felt her hard black eyes on him throughout the day, evaluating, calculating. There were more tests—convenient opportunities to steal a petty valuable, slip-ups by other staff members he could have used to further himself by blackmail or betrayal. There were hastily sealed envelopes he could have opened, half-opened doors he could have stood by, whispered conversations, hints of intrigue he could have filed away for future leverage. He did, of course; it would have been stupid not to. But he never actually used them, or gave any indication of desire in that direction. Why would he? Sometimes, in the privacy of his quarters, he laughed at the whole thing. All this dancing around and hush-hush complexity, just for him. Fifteen-year old Luke Varewé, disfavored son of sub-sector governors. Then one day, the tests stopped. When he felt the black eyes on him, they no longer evaluated, but instead reveled in a kind of grim glee. She began to speak to him more often, drop smiles and passing touches on the shoulder that smacked of the friendly. He recalled one conversation in particular. The balcony was cool and blue in the rising starlight. Luke wore a tailored, fitted outfit that made him feel uncomfortable—especially when the fourth girl in a row batted her eyelashes at him. Well, it wasn’t his fault. The clothes had been chosen for him, like everything else in this new life. He stood several meters from where Senator Melgida held her whispered conference, a respectful distance, but still near enough to hear her if she summoned. He still wasn’t quite sure why he was here. Hardly any staff attended this function, and as far as he could tell, he was the only intern. The senator’s behavior puzzled him further. She had danced just once, with a short, bearded man in military garb. Neither looked like they were having much fun. After, the military man had left immediately, whereupon Senator Melgida retreated to this balcony and proceeded to talk quietly and at length with three or four knots of elegantly-clad party-goers. Finally, this last group went on their way. Luke hoped she was ready to go. His legs were tired, and he was thirsty. A punch bowl on the other side of the ballroom had been calling his name for the last hour. To his disappointment, she drifted further out on the balcony, rested against it and stared out beyond the twinkling city below. Luke tried to gauge her inattention, wondered if he could make it to the punch bowl and back before she woke up… “Varewé.” He jumped slightly, startled and a little guilty. Her gaze was still straight ahead, and her voice distant. But there was no mistaking the harsh purpose in it. He made his way to her in a few quick, long steps. “Yes, Senator?” A cold breeze furled up from below. He shivered. She didn’t flinch. In that moment, Melgida looked almost unearthly, with the wind billowing up her hair, her face motionless, her obsidian eyes glistening weirdly in the moonlight. He took a small step backwards. “Yes. Young Varewé. So the hopes of the many rest in the few, and the small. Are you ready, Varewé? Can you shoulder the burden with the rest of us? It does not matter. I know how you will answer—I know you will try, oh, yes, foolish, young, small hero. You will try. I have seen it in your eyes. Are you the one they spoke of? Mayhap not—and if so, then the other child certainly will do. I can break her. I know it. But you, Varewé. You are an unknown factor. There is instability in you, as well as greatness. Gods help us if others play upon you before we seal you ours. He’s wrong, I know it. You’re worth the risk. You will prove yourself to him, child of destiny. You must, if you wish to live. You must prove that the blood of the Sk—” She broke off and turned on him, examining his face carefully. “Mmm. Sorry, kid. I lost it for a moment there.” The dreamlike quality had vanished from her voice, replaced by brittle alertness. Luke suddenly felt wary. “Pardon my rambling, and I hope you don’t mind if I…” she touched a hand to his forehead, and everything went black. He woke later, in his bed and with a pounding headache. Large portions of the evening were fuzzy; he had the notion that he wasn’t supposed to remember anything at all. But tenaciously, he dug at the blankness until it all came back, replayed the words she spoke to him again and again. They didn’t make any more sense than they had the first time. The next day, the senator acted like nothing had happened. He decided to play along. For a while, things seemed like they were dying down. A routine settled in, paperwork and drab bustle and late nights followed by early mornings. Luke began to be bored. He missed Garmonsaw. Then this. “Senator,” he tried again, putting on an extra burst of speed until he was alongside of her, “I’m sorry, but I still don’t understand why you nominated me.” She halted abruptly. Luke’s forward momentum kept him going a few steps before he skidded to a stop and circled back around. The senator stood with her arms crossed, observing him narrowly. “Self-doubt kills, Varewé. Don’t forget that tonight.” “But Senator…” The frustration curled into his tone before he could reign it in. “I have no clue why I’m going to be up there in the first place.” She smirked, flipping cropped hair out of her eyes. “Because whether you realize it or not, you’re the best, and we—I need you to start demonstrating that publicly. Just wait. After tonight, if—when—you do well…oh, just wait.” She started walking again, even faster than before. Involuntarily, Luke’s hands clenched into fists. Mysteries. He was so sick of them. Lying is a fine tool in the hands of a ruler, but not when he lies to himself. Luke sucked in his breath sharply. “You again,” he accused, soft enough that Senator Melgida would not hear. Yes. “What do you want?” To bend to your will. He sighed. “Talk straight, palace, or whatever you are. That’s my will.” Look into yourself, young master. Find the weakness you bear and defeat it utterly. Only then can you take your rightful place within me. “And what weakness is that?” Such brute directness. But subtlety will come with time. This truth I offer you, as a token of fealty. You are angry with this woman not because of a mystery withheld, but because of love withheld. You fear tonight because you fear to disappoint her. Do not fear, master. More power lies in you than you know. Her love is irrelevant, however. The power is everything. “Go away,” Luke said. The senator cast a swift, confused look over her shoulder. He shrugged apologetically, and subvocalized between clenched, smiling teeth. “Leave me alone.” Mocking laughter floated around him. Never, master. Never again. Tonight all their plans come undone. I have made it so… Luke decided that ignoring It might be the best option. That had worked once or twice in the past. To his relief, within a few moments his mind was alone, and he began to breath freely again. But only for a moment. They had arrived. Two men in sleek uniforms dashed up, grabbed him by the arms and bundled him into a small room. “You’re late,” one of them huffed to the senator. “My apologies,” she said in a very unapologetic tone. He glared at her, and looked Luke up and down. “So. You’re the one filling in for Gharien kid. Ever debated on the galactic level before?” Mutely, Luke shook his head. The man peered at him suspiciously. “Then what—? How about Oversector? No? Regional? Planetary? Kid, have you ever participated in a formal debate at all? No? Dammit, Melgida. What are you playing at?” “Shut up and get him out there,” she snapped. “Like you said, we’re late.” He fired off a few colorful speculations on the senator’s maternal genealogy, ran a lint-roller over Luke’s tunic, and clapped twice. A door slid open, spilling in sharp, bright light and a lot of noise. Luke blinked, raised a hand to shield his face, felt himself being hustled forward. The next thing he knew, he was all alone on a stage, red dots swimming before his eyes where the light blinded him. No…not alone, he realized as his vision adjusted. A tall, willowy blonde with cool grey eyes stood behind a podium several meters away. And just below the stage, there was a very large crowd. All staring directly at him Luke swallowed and walked unsteadily to the empty podium that appeared to be for him. Distantly, he heard their names announced, but failed to catch the girl’s. Some more stuff was said. Then, all lights in the hall darkened except for two spotlights—one of them precisely on his face. How do I get into these things? he wondered. Laugh all you want, Gartee. I have an extremely bad feeling about this. And then, suddenly, the fear evaporated. His back straightened of its own accord. His mind cleared; no, more than cleared. Every thought was crisply outlined, frozen, clear, like deadly crystals. A strange confidence shot up his spine. Luke laughed shortly and adjusted the microphone. So he could do this. So he had no idea why. So what was new? The blonde launched into her opening speech. He leaned forward slightly. Let the games begin. In a small hut on the other side of the galaxy, an old man sits bolt upright, sweat pouring down his face “No…” he gasps. “They were not nightmares, then. Sola has failed us.” On an arrow-shaped vessel of war, a man sleeps who is neither dead nor truly alive, neither good nor wholly bad, neither light nor dark, neither man nor machine. He also feels the ripple. In the hyperbaric chamber, he raises a scarred head and wonders. Very close to the ripple’s origin, a third man meditates in the center of a storm. The roaring wind carries him a suggestion hidden in its ravaging. He catches it, holds it in his palms, turns it over and over, thinking. A bloody smile spreads across his face. ============ TBC... -----signature----- Master of tjace and bi0nic. In mourning for the one year, nine months, and five days it has been since The Souls of Demons was updated. sob
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G__Anakin Registered: Apr '06	Date Posted: 4/26/07 5:36pm Subject: RE: In Plain Sight: Luke’s Story – ANH AU – Luke/Vader/Palpatine/Mara/OCs – short story--Update 4/26
	Great job! I like your user name! -----signature----- Master to tahiriveilax - - - My fanfic - - - Fate of the Jedi - Abyss : http://boards.theforce.net/beyond_the_saga/b10477/30246540/p1/ Yeah, I used the real title for the next book. Beware Omen Spoilers.
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Jade_eyes Registered: Aug '04	Date Posted: 4/26/07 6:10pm Subject: RE: In Plain Sight: Luke’s Story – ANH AU – Luke/Vader/Palpatine/Mara/OCs – short story--Update 4/26
	This is getting more fascinating with each update. Melgida's either a Jedi or Sith undercover. My bet's on the former but ... Thanks for the PM, and I do hope your computer doesn't fizzle. I'd hate for this story to grind to a halt. -----signature----- Spock/Nyota, woven forever together in gorgeous bonds of Nyota's "Cherished Moments" diary's gonna be hawt, hawt, melty! Squggles! [face_melting into 10 buckets!]
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BrentusofGath Registered: Aug '05	Date Posted: 4/26/07 7:00pm Subject: RE: In Plain Sight: Luke¡¯s Story ¨C ANH AU ¨C Luke/Vader/Palpatine/Mara/OCs ¨C short story--Update
	Why me and who is she and what the heck have I gotten myself into figured pretty prominently, too. LOL! Poor whiny Luke. Though he's not doing as much whining as he usually does. More quiet calculating, listening to intrigue. You must prove that the blood of the Sk-" She knows who he is, or was led to suspect. Never, master. Never again. Tonight all their plans come undone. I have made it so... Cool, the building talks again. I love it when the walls speak to me- uh, I mean Luke. How do I get into these things? LOL! Now there's whiny Luke. and WOW! The three stooges (Obi-Wan, Vader and Palps) felt his presence on the podium. There's a big collision a'brewin' and I can't wait to see it! -----signature----- In time or so I'm told, I'm just another soul for sale, oh well Feel it in my bones when you break my back, break it just to watch me bend Why'd you have to go and Let it Die? -Foo Fighters http://conscienceoftheking.blogspot.com/
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tasujad Registered: Jun '05	Date Posted: 4/27/07 12:56am Subject: RE: In Plain Sight: Luke’s Story – ANH AU – Luke/Vader/Palpatine/Mara/OCs – short story--Update 4/26
	Is this the beginning of the Jedis end OR the beginning of the sith's end? Oh well, will be tuning in to the next update -----signature----- The force is ALWAYS with me * *well almost always - i hope
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