Jedi Council Forums - Braken Starblaster, Space Attorney: The Dark Darkness (Luke on Trial, humor

Locked Topic | Read Only Topic | Previous Active Topic | Next Active Topic

Pages: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 - ~~Previous~~ | Next | Reload

Author	Topic: Braken Starblaster, Space Attorney: The Dark Darkness (Luke on Trial, humor - complete 8/7)
The_Face Title: Ex-Manager Registered: Feb '03	Date Posted: 6/25/07 4:37pm Subject: Braken Starblaster, Space Attorney: The Dark Darkness (Luke on Trial, humor - complete 8/7) - Date Edited: 8/7/07 7:07pm (9 edits total) Edited By: The_Face
	Title: Braken Starblaster, Space Attorney: The Dark Darkness Author: The_Face Timeframe: 1.5 months post-ANH Characters: Braken Starblaster, Luke Skywalker, OC lawyers, and various canon guest spots Genre: Humor, AU Keywords: Lawyers, court, trial, Empire, Death Star, insanity Summary: An incompetent Imperial lawyer is assigned the case of the century – defending Luke Skywalker, the man accused of destroying the Death Star. Hijinks ensue accordingly. Notes: This fic is very strange. It is supposed to be. I hope you like it. Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Star Wars characters, locations, objects, concepts, particles, etc. Nor do I claim to characterize any of them in a recognizable fashion. Apologies/"neener-neener" to those I spoof and/or pay homage to, too many to list here. It's all in love. Chapter One There is an obscure planet on the very edge of the Outer Rim that is not in itself physically remarkable, unless you count the fact that it is about to be destroyed. However, it has an intriguing quasi-democratic society of beaver-seagull-men that includes four major divisions of government. The first is the legislative, which makes up laws and ordinances to better the condition of the people (and hopefully their lobbyists too). The second is the executive, which consists of the beaver-seagull-woman with the best-looking quills (called Miss Figurehead) and her advisors (who, luckily, happen to be wise on that planet). The third, and most remarkable, is the justilicious branch. No one is sure why it’s called that. At any rate, it is where lawbreakers are brought before a court of a fair-minded judge and fair-minded citizens. Vile offenders are jailed and the innocent are freed with a 100% success rate, which seems impossible, but obviously isn’t. The fourth branch is Ringo, on drums. But this story is not about the planet Quimeran. It is about the government responsible for its destruction, the outlandish and improbable way that government dealt with its greatest rebellion, and a system that is not quite as justilicious. Which brings us to a fellow named Starblaster. Braken Starblaster, space attorney. ****** Braken sat in a hovertrain moving 700 kilometers an hour with his arm around Trixie McVzlste, who, since the start of the trip, had broken up with him eighteen times and counting. This was not a matter of reconciliation. It was a matter of Braken being too stupid for her to make him understand they were broken up. “Braken,” she sighed. “Yes dear?” The lawyer turned to what he thought was still his petite blonde girlfriend. In fact, she had died her hair bright purple a week ago to see if Braken would notice. The insensitive jerk had not, thus the last straw. Thus the 18 break-ups. Little did she know Braken was color-blind to the difference between blonde and bright purple. He was, however, an insensitive jerk. “I think we should see other people.” “I see people all the time, Trixie. Heck, there’s at least 30 people in this hovertrain car alone!” “I mean romantically. Date other people.” Braken frowned suspiciously. “That seems like it would cut into our together-time.” Trixie struggled to keep the rage from her face. “That’s the point, Braken. I think it’s over.” “Why?” “It’s not you,” she lied. “It’s me.” “I’m fine with you.” “Okay, it’s all you. I don’t love you. Get that through your thick skull, please! I! Hate! You!” “So the dinner this weekend is off?” “Yes! Every dinner is off!” “Won’t we get hungry?” That’s when she threw him off the train. This may seem extraordinary, but is not for several reasons, which are as follows: One, Braken had been that offensively dumb their entire relationship. Trixie’s hate had been bottling up a long time, and been shaken around a lot. Violence was the fizz of weeks of rage. Two, they were on the planet Kressel. No, not Kessel. People always make that mistake, and quite frankly, Kressel is sick of it. Kressel is not a desolate red spice-rich desert prison-world. It is a lightly-populated red paprika-rich desert world with three prison cells, one of which is always holding the wacky local drunk, who killed 13 men and didn’t pay his taxes. Anyway, Kressel has a very weak gravitational force. So Braken was light enough for Trixie to toss out. Three, the train window was made of weak Alderaanian starglass. When Alderaan was destroyed a month and a half earlier, the notorious smuggler Tonno Two-Heads was carrying a shipload of sand offworld, thinking for whatever reason that it was something of value. The explosion of the planet crystallized the load. But a corporation recovered the resulting glass and sold it as the remnants of Alderaan. It is of terrible quality (and thus, easy to throw a lawyer through), but had a slick marketing campaign. (Incidentally, Tonno died a horrible death.) Braken fell through the starglass, thinking for sure he was doomed. He felt something hard hit him, but not the ground. He opened his eyes and looked around. It was durasteel. He was on the outside of a train headed the opposite direction. Now this may seem extraordinary. It is. “This,” he said, “is extraordinary.” Braken had fallen out at the moment two trains passed each other – exactly three hours after the other train embarked 3200 kilometers from the station from which Braken’s (henceforth Train A) left. They met ¾ of the way to the other train’s point of origin. Ignoring planetary curvature and assuming constant speed, find x. Braken looked at the rocky desert ground speeding by below at 700 kilometers an hour. He brushed some paprika off his sleeve and noticed a slight rip in his shirt from a rivet he’d caught on. He dramatically growled three words. “I should sue.” ****** A hawkbat who was not Braken Starblaster swept majestically across the deep cloudless blue sky, followed by two dozen more of his kind in a triangle formation. Their epic flight over an exotic mountain range stopped. The hawkbats’ wings froze in mid-flap, and the holo played the six-second clip again. Beneath the video hovered the words CONFORMITY: You are like your fingerprints… exactly the same. The holo was of the EmpInspirations motivational series for offices throughout the galaxy. The Empire was the only organization that bought them, and was now burdened with an incredible surplus. The only saving grace was that the line was discontinued, since everyone who worked at EmpInspirations had since committed suicide. This holo-poster, and many like it, covered practically every centimeter of wallspace at the legal offices of Palpatine, Palpatine, and Palpatine. This is the workplace of the Empire’s lawyers, including Braken Starblaster, a vaguely handsome but oily meathead who’d walked into the office just as the identical hawkbats swept majestically for the 41,376th time. As omniscient narrator, that is the kind of crap I am cursed to know. Not to mention every innermost though Jabba’s ever had – that ain’t a picnic. Anyway, Braken walked in. (Ed. Note: You went all that way when three words would do? You owe me a minute of my life, jerk. Cut all of it.) He saw a fellow lawyer talking to a clone in an adjoining hallway. “No, I’m not convinced you’re Jango Fett, and even if you were, you couldn’t claim an entire army of clones for tax deductions.” Braken kept walking. A young man with shaggy brown hair stepped into his path – his intern, Zokk Hopscotcher. “Oh, Braken, you’re back! Did you have a nice trip? Trixie came back, like, hours ago. I thought you were traveling together?” Braken blinked. He wasn’t entirely sure of anything Zokk had just said in all that chattering. “We hate Trixie now,” he informed the suggestible young lad. “Okay!” he said brightly. “Oh, can you help me with this?” He produced an improbably thick brown folder and rooted through the flimsi sheets inside. “What does it mean here by ‘extralegal’?” “It’s extralegal, Zokk,” Braken said with a tone that implied this concept was simpler than breathing. “That means it’s even more legal than usual. The government encourages it. Paying your taxes early, for example. Buying a portrait of the Emperor. The kind of things people get merit badges and employee of the month awards for.” He puffed up his chest and raised his chin to look just over Zokk’s head. “Excellence.” Zokk frowned, confused. “Really? ‘Cause this is referring to flying a TIE Fighter while intoxicated and blowing up half a docking bay in the process.” Braken raised an eyebrow at the shorter human. He said, “Oh. Well I don’t consider traffic law canon.” “Hmm. By the way, Mr. Doufoom wants to see you in his office.” “What does he want?” “To see you in his office,” Zokk repeated, slower and louder. Braken sighed. His protégé was a bit of an idiot. So was he, but he was too stupid to know that. He navigated the grey, holo-poster-lined corridors of Palpatine, Palpatine, and Palpatine until he found the office of Ajian Cyrus Doufoom, his boss and generally Imperial guy. The door was open, so Braken poked his head in. “You wanted to see me, sir?” Ajian glanced up at Braken over his eyeglasses. He was a human male in his 50s, with hair swept back so far it seemed as if it would pull him away by the scalp at any moment. Or at least it seemed that way if you had an overactive imagination, time on your hands to examine his ‘do, and a hallucination problem. He is played by Christopher Walken. “Ah, Starblaster. You’re late.” “Trixie dumped me…” “To say I’m… surprised would be a lie.” “…Out the hovertrain.” “We could trade excuses all day,” Ajian said, “but there’s business to… attend to. You have a case. I already gave… CL-113/9 the file. You two… will… be… working together on this one. He should be meeting with the client… already in Room 3A. You’re late.” “She put me through the window,” Braken said. Ajian held up a hand and put his commlink to his face. “Beeeeeeep,” said the dialtone. Ajian said, “I have to take this, Braken.” “…Right.” Braken turned and walked out of the office. He headed down the hallway and went in search of Room 3A in the labyrinthine building. He found it three meters away from Doufoom’s office, just under eight minutes later. Like I said, labyrinthine. And, again, Braken was a bit of an idiot. “Hi there, sorry I’m late. Braken Starblaster, space attorney.” He extended a hand to a pale, haunted-looking man dressed entirely in black. “And you’re a… cosmo-ninja?” “I have slain many cosmo-ninjas, and they are not to be trifled with, nor made a joke,” the man replied. Braken turned to CL-113/9, a clone in a suit with a Mandolorian-print on his necktie. “What’s the story?” CL handed him several sheets of flimsiplast, stapled together, and Braken examined it. The document was full of muddled legal speech and those paragraph-sentences chock-full of extremely dependent clauses that huddle around each other for empathy and, while lacking in periods, enthusiastically overcompensate with commas and the occasional semicolon, and for this reason Braken had to read over it a few (a few being nine in this case) times – first for the main framework, which turned out to be two words long, seven times for all the ideas, and another time for review because he drifted off during the eighth read-through – before he finally understood, and could be fully and knowledgeably bored with the whole thing. “And I take it you’re Henshu Vennom?” “I am the shadow of mortality, present in all th–” “Yeah, great,” interrupted Braken. “You’re practicing the Dark Side without a license.” Henshu glared and crossed his arms. “No document, or man’s law, can regulate the power of the dark power that fl–” Braken addressed CL. “I wasn’t aware – and continue not to care – that the Force was regulated so.” “It is,” the other lawyer replied. “We’re up against the Official Galactic Bureau of Official Force-User Registration Bureau (Ed. Note: Patent pending) here. It’s not looking good.” Henshu scoffed. “You weaklings should not rely on su–” “Shut up,” both lawyers told their client. “Braken, can I see you outside for a moment?” CL suggested. They stepped out of the room and into the hallway, in front of a holo-poster that read FEAR: If a Pretty Picture and Touching Saying Don’t Motivate You, Threats Will. “What is it?” Braken asked. “Do you have an idea for how to win this ridiculous case?” “No,” the clone replied, “I have this great bit for my stand-up routine, and I think this is what’s gonna make my career take off. Okay, first I do the Born Man voice, and use lots of stereotypes and make him seem like a real nerd, then I do this super-cool Clone Man voice…” “CL, we don’t have time for your comedian dreams and… Wait, there are stereotypes for people who have parents?” “If you’re curious, you all sunburn easily and love nerfsteak.” “Let’s just get back to work.” “Braken,” he said earnestly, “I don’t think you understand how much the Born Man loves nerfsteak. It’s way more than anyone possibly could!” Today’s Moral: Exaggeration. Not always that funny. ****** Next chapter: Jamie Calrissian, JusticeTron, and the ins and outs of Force user regulation. Plus, recess! A/N: If you'd like to be sent a PM when this story is updated, simply say so in your response, and I will add you to the list. You can get off said list at any time just by asking. -----signature----- "Writing is a socially acceptable form of schizophrenia." - E.L. Doctorow
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History
NYCitygurl Title: Manager of SFFBC, C&G, NSWFF, and Icons Registered: Jul '02	Date Posted: 6/25/07 5:33pm Subject: RE: Braken Starblaster, Space Attorney: The Dark Darkness (Luke on Trial, humor)
	Oh, my gosh. Face, you are absolutely hilarious!! I mean, bloody brilliant!! Very nice job writing like Douglas Adams, by the way -- especially with that bit in the beginning about the planet that was about to get blown up. And nice Ringo reference I'd quote my favorite part, but I'd be quoting most of the story. I absolutely love it!!! Please keep me on the PM list -----signature----- I agree with RJ Officially Idri's Muse "Hat. We thought of authentic Native American headdress before we thought of hat."
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History
JadeSolo Title: Manager Emeritus Registered: Sep '02	Date Posted: 6/25/07 7:23pm Subject: RE: Braken Starblaster, Space Attorney: The Dark Darkness (Luke on Trial, humor)
	Oh.My.God. I hurt myself laughing, and then I almost started crying. Not because I hurt myself, but because it was really funny. Where do I start??? Favorite lines... posted: Braken had fallen out at the moment two trains passed each other – exactly three hours after the other train embarked 3200 kilometers from the station from which Braken’s (henceforth Train A) left. They met ¾ of the way to the other train’s point of origin. Ignoring planetary curvature and assuming constant speed, find x. x=42 posted: As omniscient narrator, that is the kind of crap I am cursed to know. Absolute most favorite line. Seriously, I'm still laughing. posted: He is played by Christopher Walken. I cracked up when I saw the ellipses. Brilliant!! And the lawyer-speak part was just perfect. I loved that paragraph-sentence. If you bottled your humor and sold it, you'd be a very rich man because I'd corner the market. PM me, please. -----signature----- "If you expect a kick in the balls and you get a slap in the face, it's a victory." "May God bless you and keep you always...I mean that in a civic deist way." -Prof. Siegel "No guaranteed money, but all guaranteed fun!"
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History
Obi-Zahn Kenobi Registered: Aug '99	Date Posted: 6/25/07 10:58pm Subject: RE: Braken Starblaster, Space Attorney: The Dark Darkness (Luke on Trial, humor)
	You're brilliant! -----signature----- "Perhaps Darth Guy will breed some sort of albino shouting gorilla." - Master_Jacen
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History
palpyisgod2 Registered: Aug '05	Date Posted: 6/26/07 3:04am Subject: RE: Braken Starblaster, Space Attorney: The Dark Darkness (Luke on Trial, humor)
	Love this! PM's here--> -----signature----- "Oh, Janette...I didn't know you could do that... I think I feel an election coming on..." -John Howard "Keating" - The Musical We Had To Have
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History
oqidaun Title: Manager Emeritus Registered: Jul '05	Date Posted: 6/26/07 7:58am Subject: RE: Braken Starblaster, Space Attorney: The Dark Darkness (Luke on Trial, humor)
	Holy !!!! This was funny as hell. It's great to see this up. There were so many excellent one-liners that I could probably quote the whole thing, but I'm too lazy. So I'll choose my favorite: Extralegal: “That means it’s even more legal than usual. -----signature----- . . . . I'm so bad, I banned myself.
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History
Thumper09 Registered: Dec '01	Date Posted: 6/26/07 8:04am Subject: RE: Braken Starblaster, Space Attorney: The Dark Darkness (Luke on Trial, humor)
	Hee hee, awesome start on this! The Douglas Adams-esque wording and tone was well done. If JadeSolo is correct about x=42 (I got some bad flashbacks from seeing a dreaded...gasp Word Problem, so I ain't gonna doublecheck the answer myself ), then I'd say you hit upon the Ultimate Question, except it wasn't really a question. It was more of a group of declarative sentences with an imperative at the end. Ultimate Imperative? Ultimate Word Problem? (This is secretly still my favorite way to find x. ) But anyway, I'm digressing even more than normal. There were so many great lines in this story that I can't list them all, but I think this part eeks out as my favorite: Ajian held up a hand and put his commlink to his face. “Beeeeeeep,” said the dialtone. Ajian said, “I have to take this, Braken.” The motivational posters were a great touch, too. I'm looking forward to following this group of colorful characters, meeting more (JusticeTron? I'm really curious about that one.) and seeing what zany things they do. Please add me to the PM list. -Thumper -----signature----- "Like anything worth writing, it came inexplicably and without method." -Karen Eiffel, Stranger Than Fiction "Adamantine"--Rebel OC vig http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/30390799 "That's 'stupid plan, sir,' Lieutenant." -Wedge
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History
jedi_of_ennth Registered: Mar '05	Date Posted: 6/26/07 9:12am Subject: RE: Braken Starblaster, Space Attorney: The Dark Darkness (Luke on Trial, humor)
	Absolutely, totally brilliant. Love the Douglas Adams vibe. Add me to the PM list. -----signature----- "I'm your friend. I love you." -- Zekk to Jaina, LotF: Fury
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History
talkingbanana Registered: Jun '03	Date Posted: 6/26/07 7:17pm Subject: RE: Braken Starblaster, Space Attorney: The Dark Darkness (Luke on Trial, humor)
	Face! You started a new story and didn't tell me! How do I get on the permanent new story PM list? Anyway, it looks like another summer of wacky Face humor is off to a good start. The whole idea of a lawyer being that stupid (extralegal = more legal than normal? ) is hilarious to begin with, and I can't wait to see what you come up with next. And Starblaster defending the guy who blew up the real star-blaster? Wouldn't expect anything less in a name from you. Loved this part: The document was full of muddled legal speech and those paragraph-sentences chock-full of extremely dependent clauses that huddle around each other for empathy and, while lacking in periods, enthusiastically overcompensate with commas and the occasional semicolon, and for this reason Braken had to read over it a few (a few being nine in this case) times â€“ first for the main framework, which turned out to be two words long, seven times for all the ideas, and another time for review because he drifted off during the eighth read-through â€“ before he finally understood, and could be fully and knowledgeably bored with the whole thing. I also enjoyed the Demotivator posters, great knock-off. Keep up the good work, Face! -----signature----- How? Myn/Lara one-shot, Betrayal, slight AU http://boards.theforce.net/beyond_the_saga/b10477/28175766/p1/?0 Sometimes it's better to light a flamethrower than curse the darkness. - Terry Pratchett, Men at Arms
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History
The_Face Title: Ex-Manager Registered: Feb '03	Date Posted: 6/27/07 10:39am Subject: RE: Braken Starblaster, Space Attorney: The Dark Darkness (Luke on Trial, humor) - Date Edited: 6/27/07 12:25pm (1 edits total) Edited By: The_Face
	NYCitygurl: Ringo shows up on the end of just about every gag list I make. It has yet to get old - for me at least. JadeSolo: Self abuse is not the answer! x=42 A+ Walken as Ajian was in the fic from fairly early on, but shortly before I posted this chapter I realized what was missing to drive that experience home. Oddly-placed... pauses. oqi, you picked my favorite line. Thumper, there's no way Jade can be correct (other than that 42 is always correct), because I never said what the heck x was supposed to represent. It just came out of nowhere at the end. You could, however, probably calculate the other train's velocity. I wouldn't, and refuse to try. I'd seen the math answers before, but they were still just as funny the second time around. 'nanner posted: How do I get on the permanent new story PM list? By asking that nicely. The Demotivators would be so perfect for the Empire, I thought I'd make some up just for them. (Confused onlookers, I direct you to despair.com, one of the funniest places on the web) Thanks so much for all the kind words, everybody! x 8 Update PM list NYCitygurl JadeSolo palpyisgod2 Thumper09 jedi_of_ennth Special Double Secret "Any New Story" PM list talkingbanana -----signature----- "Writing is a socially acceptable form of schizophrenia." - E.L. Doctorow
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History
Luton_Plunder Registered: Jun '06	Date Posted: 6/27/07 5:24pm Subject: RE: Braken Starblaster, Space Attorney: The Dark Darkness (Luke on Trial, humor)
	Face, to say this is fantastic is no small understatement. But it is fantastic. It is every bit as funny as a shot of Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy mixed with a healthy dose of Jasper Fforde, except better because the Face style and humour is shining through Quoting my favourite parts would be frivolous, but a short list would be: Extralegal, We Hate Trixie Now, "To. See. You. In. His. Office.", The Bornman, Tonno Two-Heads...my goodness. Tooo much to like I'm humbly requesting to be put on the Update list for this story! Cant wait for more -----signature----- The Essential Guide to OCs. Say No to Mary. http://boards.theforce.net/fan_fiction_resource/b10304/25562370/p1
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History
Jedi_Eruanne Registered: Jun '05	Date Posted: 6/27/07 8:05pm Subject: RE: Braken Starblaster, Space Attorney: The Dark Darkness (Luke on Trial, humor)
	cough-choke Remind me not to even SWALLOW while reading you stories! It's DANGEROUS! Do I get to be on the 'Special Double Secret "Any New Story" PM list'? Or am I already on it? huggles Thanks for writing a fanmarvical new story for me to read! -----signature----- <><Jedi Knight For Christ><> Links to Fics in Profile---go check em out! Loyal Reader of Quiet_Mandalorian. MystralGurl's CRAZY Evil Twin (mwuhahahaha) Have you hugged your evil twin today?
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History
lordmaul13 Registered: Oct '00	Date Posted: 6/27/07 8:13pm Subject: RE: Braken Starblaster, Space Attorney: The Dark Darkness (Luke on Trial, humor)
	Which brings us to a fellow named Starblaster. Braken Starblaster, space attorney. Absolutely hilarious! I’m definitely keeping an eye on this one. ~lordmaul13 -----signature----- tatooinewizard's partner in crime I can dream now, Joey. Oh, you wouldn't believe what I can dream of now. Hellraiser III Better Days Than These http://boards.theforce.net/Message.aspx?topic=27626554&brd=10475&start=27629823
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History
1Yodimus_Prime Registered: Mar '04	Date Posted: 6/27/07 11:58pm Subject: RE: Braken Starblaster, Space Attorney: The Dark Darkness (Luke on Trial, humor)
	I see you took the 'narrator who is self-aware' concept and pushed it a step further by adding 'and the editor who hates him'. Brilliant! The insane opening was very Douglas Adams. I see a very clear Monty Python inspiration here too. To skim the surface. I expect you to PM me when you update, or I'll sue. I love their agency. "Palpatine, Palpatine, and Palpatine" cracked me up!! “Hmm. By the way, Mr. Doufoom wants to see you in his office.” “What does he want?” “To see you in his office,” Zokk repeated, slower and louder. ^^^ Awesome! reminds me of that joke, "What does a yellow light mean?" "Slow down." "sigh What....does...a...yellow..." etc. I love that stuff. Ajian glanced up at Braken over his eyeglasses. He was a human male in his 50s, with hair swept back so far it seemed as if it would pull him away by the scalp at any moment. Or at least it seemed that way if you had an overactive imagination, time on your hands to examine his ‘do, and a hallucination problem. He is played by Christopher Walken. Damn it! You beat me to the offhanded 'he is played by' joke!! Now it's gonna look like I stole it from you. “I am the shadow of mortality, present in all th–” “Yeah, great,” interrupted Braken. “You’re practicing the Dark Side without a license.” This is pure "Birdman: Attorney at Law" gold Will we be getting a moral at the end of every chapter? Because that would also be awesome. -----signature----- Rule 12: A soft answer turneth away wrath. Once wrath is looking the other way, shoot it in the head. --- http://boards.theforce.net/b/b1/26481069 - The Wise http://boards.theforce.net/B/b1/21283317 - Planet Hopping
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History
BigE Registered: Jul '02	Date Posted: 6/28/07 5:14am Subject: RE: Braken Starblaster, Space Attorney: The Dark Darkness (Luke on Trial, humor)
	This is hilarious, and if you don't add me to the PM list I'll join Yodimus in the suit...the legal suit I mean. “No, I’m not convinced you’re Jango Fett, and even if you were, you couldn’t claim an entire army of clones for tax deductions.” Well, you can't blame Jango for trying. “Ah, Starblaster. You’re late.” “Trixie dumped me…” “To say I’m… surprised would be a lie.” “…Out the hovertrain.” “We could trade excuses all day,” Ajian said, “but there’s business to… attend to. Typical workplace superior. No excuses. I also appreciate the Douglas Adams feel, the 'Demotivator', and Christopher Walken bits. All together it's shaping up to be a classic. -----signature----- Not charging for Awesomeness. Gentlemen's Writing Guild 'Shipwrecked' challenge: http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/30481486/r30519170/ psst: It's "crazy good", says a source. Eduard Cullen = Gary Stu. Yep, I said it.
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History
brodiew Registered: Oct '05	Date Posted: 6/28/07 8:57am Subject: RE: Braken Starblaster, Space Attorney: The Dark Darkness (Luke on Trial, humor) - Date Edited: 6/28/07 8:59am (1 edits total) Edited By: brodiew
	Now that was a fun ride, Face! When does Luke come on the scene? I loved the editorial notes, and other Imperial asides. The fact the Braken is clueless about his cluelessness is another fun hook. Will you PM me when you update? -----signature----- “You were right about one thing, Master. The negotiations were short.”
	Locked Topic \| Active Topic Notification \| Private Message \| Post History

Pages: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 - ~~Previous~~ | Next | Reload