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Topic:
Diary of a Swamp Thing--Pink 5 Dear Diary response--Stacey's year with Yoda--New post 7/7
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DarthIshtar
Title: Former CR
Star Wars Trivia Hostess
Registered:
Mar '01
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Date Posted:
1/1 11:27pm
Subject:
Diary of a Swamp Thing--Pink 5 Dear Diary response--Stacey's year with Yoda--New post 7/7
- Date Edited:
7/7 10:36am (15 edits total)
Edited By:
DarthIshtar
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Disclaimer: If you haven't heard of Pink 5 yet, you're probably wondering what my icon is and you're also missing out on a great thing. The Pink 5 series, created by Trey Stokes, is the award-winning saga of Stacey, a Valley Girl X-wing pilot who has the tendency to be in the wrong place at the right time and therefore somewhat save the day. The final installment, Return of Pink 5, Volume 3, will be released this year and you should do yourself a favor and go watch the entire series by then.
Anyway, I digress. The point is, about a year and a half ago, I wrote a Pink 5 fanfiction story and somehow got noticed by Trey Stokes, the aforementioned genius who came up with this. He graciously offered to let me write more and get lots of help from him. Naturally, I jumped at the chance and the first idea I came up with was this project.
In Pink 5 Strikes Back, Stacey wrecks her X-wing and fails to catch a ride with Luke Skywalker. She is subsequently stuck on Dagobah for a year under the tutelage of Yoda. No one has mentioned what happened in that year, but by the time she gets off the "stupid, dirty planet," she has a huge soft spot for Yoda and he for her. Explaining all of that was just too good to pass up.
So, anyway, this is my explanation of what went on there. This is not officially-sanctioned Pink 5 backstory--I will tell you when Trey has approved of something--but the good man has given me immense amounts of help with characterization and spoilers over the years and when I PMed him to ask if I could use the idea that I'd pitched for my Dear Diary entry, he mercifully said "Okay by me."
Okay, so that was the longest intro ever, but I had to explain this. This will not make sense unless you realize that yes, the narrative style is supposed to sound like that.
On with the show!
*****
DAY 1
Okay, so this totally sucks. It's been, what, a whole day since the new kid ditched me here with psychotic frog guy? Something like that. Whatever it's been, Golden Boy totally peeled out of here without giving me a ride. Yeah, like he's got something so important to do. Whatever. I'm so over this place and who knows when I'll get out of here.
First thing I did was try to get a signal. Hey, I figure I got the smuggler guy on the phone once here already and maybe someday he'll check his messages. I've got to find my cell charger--there's no way I'm going to have my phone off when he decides to come to my rescue.
It's not like I really want him to come to my rescue. That whole damsel-in-distress thingy is for freaks like Princess Hairstyle who are just, like, totally desperate for a guy. Any guy, including MY BOYFRIEND. I'll get myself out of here on my own, dammit! It'd just be cool to know he cares. Make up for him going out with Miss Thang just because I wasn't there at Cloud City or whatever.
So, so far, I've texted him, my sister Tracey, that weird pilot guy who thinks I'm hot and my little robot guy. Maybe if he gets the text, he'll come help me fix my ship. I didn't mean for that big bat-thing to steal him. Yeah, it bites, but it totally wasn't my fault.
So, I got one text back and it's an ad. I'm stuck on a big mudball without a GPS and no wings on my ship and they still want my money. What are they selling this time? Oh, yeah, a new kind of mud mask. Like I'm really lacking that right now!
Maybe if I order something, they'll come deliver it here and I'll just snag a ride with them. I just have to figure out where here is. Note to self: Get a geography lesson from the frog guy or Invisiboy Kenobi tonight. One of them's got to know what they're doing.
First order of business, I so have to figure out what to do about the house situation. I've got this huge crick in my neck from trying to sleep on the ground in that hut and if I'm gonna be here for a while, there is, like, no way I'm staying there. Problem is, my ship isn't much better. That means I've got to sweet-talk Little Froggy Sadistic into helping.
Where'd the new kid sleep when he was here, anyway? I bet he totally got hooked up just because he's the special one they've all been waiting for. What's so special about him, anyway? He's got bad hair, no color sense, smells like a monkey and talks to his imaginary friends more than he does to normal people. And his dad's heavy-breathing-goth-dude! At least I'm not the kid of a creepo like that! But do I get any breaks? Nooooooooo, that would be too much to ask for.
If I'm not out of here by the end of the week, I foresee some major suffering.
-----signature-----
"You are some self-important encyclopedia with too much time on his hands. I will see to it personally that you are used for spare parts every time my speeder needs an overhaul. You and that overpriced forklift out there." ~Dr. Bel Maden
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palpyisgod2
Registered:
Aug '05
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Date Posted:
1/2 12:39am
Subject:
RE: Diary of a Swamp Thing--Pink 5 Dear Diary response--Stacey's year with Yoda
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*snags first post* Ish, put me on the PM List!
-----signature-----
"Oh, Janette...I didn't know you could do that...
I think I feel an election coming on..."
-John Howard
"Keating" - The Musical We Had To Have
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lazykbys_left
Registered:
Feb '05
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Date Posted:
1/2 12:49am
Subject:
RE: Diary of a Swamp Thing (Pink 5's diary) [like totally hilarious / link: Pink 5 Official Website]
- Date Edited:
1/2 12:53am (2 edits total)
Edited By:
lazykbys_left
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It's not like I really want him to come to my rescue. That whole damsel-in-distress thingy is for freaks like Princess Hairstyle who are just, like, totally desperate for a guy. Any guy, including MY BOYFRIEND. I'll get myself out of here on my own, dammit! It'd just be cool to know he cares. Make up for him going out with Miss Thang just because I wasn't there at Cloud City or whatever.
[face_like_totally_laughing_my_rear_end_off]
Brilliant! Wonderful! Encore! When can we expect the next update?
Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got to go re-watch the Pink Five films.
- lazy
PS: for the unenlightened:
The Pink Five Trilogy
-----signature-----
"You're like some kind of link machine." - rhonderoo It didn't stop being magic just because you found out how it was done. DARK SIDE FHTAGN lazykbys fanfic index (click and scroll dowwwn): http://boards.theforce.net/m/b1/17609715/r17736763
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DarthIshtar
Title: Former CR
Star Wars Trivia Hostess
Registered:
Mar '01
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Date Posted:
1/2 12:53am
Subject:
RE: Diary of a Swamp Thing--Pink 5 Dear Diary response--Stacey's year with Yoda
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I intend to update every day, even if it's something along the lines of "Day 36. It's raining and I don't know if it's the frog guy or me that smells this weird. Ew, I think it's me. GROSS!" or something like that.
-----signature-----
"You are some self-important encyclopedia with too much time on his hands. I will see to it personally that you are used for spare parts every time my speeder needs an overhaul. You and that overpriced forklift out there." ~Dr. Bel Maden
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DarthIshtar
Title: Former CR
Star Wars Trivia Hostess
Registered:
Mar '01
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Date Posted:
1/2 8:39pm
Subject:
RE: Diary of a Swamp Thing--Pink 5 Dear Diary response--Stacey's year with Yoda
- Date Edited:
1/3 11:38am (1 edits total)
Edited By:
DarthIshtar
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palpyisgod2--W00T for first posts.  Yes, I have put you on there. It wouldn't be a Staceyfic if you weren't here.
lazykbys_left--[face_dude_like_that_is_totally_awesome] Thanks! Encore for 364 more days? Hope you're still asking for mor later on. And thanks for linking.
*****
DAY 2
So, like, this planet totally has something against me. Either that or Master Amphibiboy is being way harsh with the weather vibes. Remember how much I totally like mud and more mud and, what was that? Yeah, MORE mud is really my thing? As if! Not only am I stuck here, I got ditched one day before the changing of the season. It went from Swamp to Rain in, like, ten seconds when I wasn't looking. So now it's all icky times ten.
I got a signal again, rang my bf for some quality time and what do I find out? His account's frozen, whatever THAT means! Gotta have positive thoughts. Positive thoughts. Ohhhhhhhhm... Ohhhhhm...
SO WHAT?! So what if she's totally jumping him? So what if it's her oversized mouth that's talking to him in person. SHE MEANS, LIKE, NOTHING TO HIM. Do you hear me? NOTHING!
God, that felt good! Except the frog guy will probably totally go ballistic on me now. Every time I vent, he goes off on how anger is of the Dark Side, passion of the Dark Side. Well, apparently, grammar's of the Dark Side, too. The point is, I've totally got a right to be pissed and it's not like he's ever had a girlfriend, so he's one to talk.
Did I mention I'm hiding from him? Yeah, I am SO not going back there when he's living on a dirt floor and getting really handy with that stick thingy. If he wants me to be all buddy-buddy with me, he's going to have to LAY OFF the whole uber-strict attitude.
Besides, I've got a sweet ride here, even with the wings knocked off. Bangin' sound system, TV and all the chick flicks I've been dragging from base to base. I think I'll watch Sleepless on Sullust and see if I remembered to pack any junk food.
-----signature-----
"You are some self-important encyclopedia with too much time on his hands. I will see to it personally that you are used for spare parts every time my speeder needs an overhaul. You and that overpriced forklift out there." ~Dr. Bel Maden
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LLL
Title: TFN Fan Fiction Archive Editor
Registered:
Jul '00
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Date Posted:
1/2 10:09pm
Subject:
RE: Diary of a Swamp Thing--Pink 5 Dear Diary response--Stacey's year with Yoda--Day 2
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All hail Ish, the Mistress of Comedy!!
PM me please!!
(And, ya know, I really gotta watch Pink Five. Good grief, my old producer Keith is their sound guy!)
-----signature-----
''Overall, to get a real deep, nuanced understanding of human behaviour, art is the best way.'' --Natalie Portman. Have a question or suggestion for the Archive? PM me anytime.
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lazykbys_left
Registered:
Feb '05
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Date Posted:
1/3 11:14am
Subject:
RE: Diary of a Swamp Thing--Pink 5 Dear Diary [DAY 2: P5 vents @ life on swamp & BF situation]
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DarthIshtar: I intend to update every day
 You are completely insane.
But in a good sort of way. 
So much good stuff - what to quote, what to quote . . .
Gotta have positive thoughts. Positive thoughts. Ohhhhhhhhm... Ohhhhhm...
SO WHAT?! So what if she's totally jumping him? So what if it's her oversized mouth that's talking to him in person. SHE MEANS, LIKE, NOTHING TO HIM. Do you hear me? NOTHING!
God, that felt good! Except the frog guy will probably totally go ballistic on me now. Every time I vent, he goes off on how anger is of the Dark Side, passion of the Dark Side. Well, apparently, grammar's of the Dark Side, too. The point is, I've totally got a right to be pissed and it's not like he's ever had a girlfriend, so he's one to talk.
- lazy
-----signature-----
"You're like some kind of link machine." - rhonderoo It didn't stop being magic just because you found out how it was done. DARK SIDE FHTAGN lazykbys fanfic index (click and scroll dowwwn): http://boards.theforce.net/m/b1/17609715/r17736763
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DarthIshtar
Title: Former CR
Star Wars Trivia Hostess
Registered:
Mar '01
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Date Posted:
1/3 6:09pm
Subject:
RE: Diary of a Swamp Thing--Pink 5 Dear Diary response--Stacey's year with Yoda--Day 2
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LLL--All hail unexpected reader who I would never have thought to see in my expression of uber-silliness. I'm glad you're enjoying that. You really do have to watch Pink 5. It's beyond hilarious. I literally cried I was laughing so hard at the premiere of Return of Pink 5, Volume 3.
lazykbys_left--I am completely insane. I wouldn't be an uptight Bostonian English major college student insurance-claims agent with a CD case full of Rachmaninoff who randomly bursts into Valley Girl if I weren't insane. Glad it's in a good way. That entire section that you quoted was intended as a prelude to a story that was commissioned by Star Wars Outsider in which Stacey makes the decision to go for a job interview in the Empire rather than running off with the Rebellion to be all heroey as usual. It's yet to be posted, but there's a really fun part in which she rationalizes WHY Han is letting Leia go after him. I love the whole thing with "Apparently, grammar's of the Dark Side, too."
*****
DAY 3
Yeah, I thought the whole hiding thing was going really well, but all of a sudden there's this weird smell coming from the back. I was pretty sure I'd showered in the last week, so I went and checked it out. Wanna know what it was? FROG GUY INVASION! Dude, how rude is that?! I mean, so what if his house flooded? It's totally not my fault the guy's never heard of a floor and he was stupid enough to stick his house in the middle of a swamp. What does he do when he doesn't have someone to mooch off of? Scare of those big bat-thingys? Maybe I should feel sorry for them after all. The frog is stuck on their planet and they've got my little robot guy, who just doesn't know when to SHUT UP! Maybe I'll get him back once they figure out that he's always like that. At least I'm used to it.
So, anyway, every time I try to talk, he chews me out for being too loud. So now my whole ship stinks and I have to do this by hand instead of recording it. It's going to take forever. Maybe if I let him say something, he'll back off. Wait a minute, why am I trying to do him a favor? It's MY SHIP! I wonder where the little stinker stashed my lightsaber. I bet I could totally scare him off, get him to go foul up somebody else's mud.
So, you know what he said when I freaked out about him being in my robot jack? "A Jedi you will be. Complete your training I shall!" Oh, sure, so he ignores me for the whole time the new kid Luke's here and then thinks he can just pick up where he left off? Yeah, right! I mean, I still have burned hairs from his little joke with the Goth suit. Sure, he'll be all great for a while, but then probably someone else will come along with no fashion sense and a bad haircut and he'll get all excited about him for a while. This is totally not what I'm supposed to be doing. I mean, sure, it's fun having a sword and all and I'm getting to be pretty good at picking up things with my brain, but he won't stop yapping about the Living Force and all that crap. If the guy would just lighten up and ditch the attitude, I might even like him eventually.
Well, maybe not like him, but I bet I'll stop wanting to whack him over the head with that stick of his.
-----signature-----
"You are some self-important encyclopedia with too much time on his hands. I will see to it personally that you are used for spare parts every time my speeder needs an overhaul. You and that overpriced forklift out there." ~Dr. Bel Maden
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MsLanna
Title: CR GSFF Central
Registered:
Jul '05
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Date Posted:
1/4 2:02am
Subject:
RE: Diary of a Swamp Thing--Pink 5 Dear Diary response--Stacey's year with Yoda--Day 3
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More Pink 5! Yay 
I'm in. 
-----signature-----
Padawan owned by Corellian_Ale Master of CloneCaptainRex. Proud FanFic Master of Darth_Sathanos Why so serious?  Accidentally e-married to sinre? 
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lazykbys_left
Registered:
Feb '05
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Date Posted:
1/4 6:05am
Subject:
RE: Diary of a Swamp Thing--Pink 5 Dear Diary[DAY 3: P5=(mad@Yoda)!=Luke's replacement]
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Oh, sure, so he ignores me for the whole time the new kid Luke's here and then thinks he can just pick up where he left off? Yeah, right!
Yeah, Stacey - tell him to stick it where the sun don't shine! 
BTW, I noticed you're updating your other Dear Diary entry at the same rate as this one. Are you sure you're not three people sharing the same account?
- lazy
-----signature-----
"You're like some kind of link machine." - rhonderoo It didn't stop being magic just because you found out how it was done. DARK SIDE FHTAGN lazykbys fanfic index (click and scroll dowwwn): http://boards.theforce.net/m/b1/17609715/r17736763
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Quigonjecca
Registered:
Jul '07
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Date Posted:
1/4 6:55am
Subject:
RE: Diary of a Swamp Thing--Pink 5 Dear Diary response--Stacey's year with Yoda--Day 3
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Awesome! I love it. Would you please put me on the PM list? LOL, Stacey's great!
-----signature-----
Voted Best New Author in the 2008 Saga Awards! "Dark Child" http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/27658856/p1/?14
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hyperspace_police
Title: FanForce CR
Arkansas US
Registered:
Jun '05
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Date Posted:
1/4 7:49am
Subject:
RE: Diary of a Swamp Thing--Pink 5 Dear Diary response--Stacey's year with Yoda--Day 3
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[valley-girl_voice]Like, totally loving this...You've like sooo captured the Pink 5 Spirit[/valley-girl_voice]
Great Job
-----signature-----
Proud member of the "Cade Brigade" (Obi, please forgive me)
Stories in bio
We managed it with the power of "assless chaps"... Oh yes... that one is a direct quote from myself...
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LilyHobbitJedi
Title:
Apples to Apples and 20 Questions hostess
Registered:
Aug '05
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Date Posted:
1/4 8:18am
Subject:
RE: Diary of a Swamp Thing--Pink 5 Dear Diary response--Stacey's year with Yoda--Day 3
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This story is absolutely hilarious! I've always enjoyed the Pink Five videos, and this story seems to go right with them. Great diary!
-----signature-----
Proud Master to eboneya & Alassë Eärfalas!  Everybody Lies- House/SW Crossover! http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/28032689/r28039379/ A Light In The Darkness http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b1047
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RK_Striker_JK_5
Registered:
Jul '03
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Date Posted:
1/4 12:34pm
Subject:
RE: Diary of a Swamp Thing--Pink 5 Dear Diary response--Stacey's year with Yoda--Day 3
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Oh, wow... I'm not sure there are enough laugh emoticons to truly express how funny this is...
Ish, I love it!
-----signature-----
E-married to the wonderful DarthIshtar. Now also her Padawan. Member of the Y.J.K. Revolution Staring into the Darkness http://boards.theforce.net/beyond_the_saga/b10477/27537567/p1/?23
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JediKaren
Registered:
Apr '07
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Date Posted:
1/4 4:04pm
Subject:
RE: Diary of a Swamp Thing--Pink 5 Dear Diary response--Stacey's year with Yoda--Day 3
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LOL oh my god that was funny as anything.
-----signature-----
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DarthIshtar
Title: Former CR
Star Wars Trivia Hostess
Registered:
Mar '01
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Date Posted:
1/4 9:59pm
Subject:
RE: Diary of a Swamp Thing--Pink 5 Dear Diary response--Stacey's year with Yoda--Day 3
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MsLanna--I have the same enthusiasm. Glad to see you here.
lazykbys_left--I have a theory that the love/hate relationship between Yoda and Stacey is a byproduct of them never being stood up to quite like that except in their case. And no, I'm not three people. Believe me, I once had the head admin ask the same question because there was a theory going around that I was Noelie, Kateydidnt and DarthIshtar. Thanks.
Quigonjecca--Thanks! Will do. Stacey is da bomb and that's not saying enough.
hyperspace_police--Dude, like thanks! I totally try. :-D No, really, thanks.
LilyHobbitJedi--I'm glad it's hilarious. The Pink 5 movies are absolutely the funniest thing I've ever seen and it is an incredible privilege to have the creator let me do this, much less be nice enough to give tips and feedback on occasion. I'm glad these go well with them. Thanks!
RK_Striker_JK_5--LOL, I'll take your word for it. Thank you!
JediKaren--LOL, I'm glad it was. Thanks.
*****
DAY 4
Recording again because the little guy is finally asleep and we figured out how to make a little tent out of my robot seat and an extra blanket. So, he's back there and can't hear me anyway. At least I hope so. I taught him a new word: "Dude." It'll take him a while to get the hang of it, but maybe then he'll get me.
So, I decided to start this whole diary thing because I wanted something to keep myself entertained. Look back on the good times or whatever. What I'm starting to get is that this is going to be a MAJOR letdown. I mean, okay, what am I supposed to say? "Today it rained and then rained and froggy over there totally reeks and oh, did I mention it's raining?" I mean, come on!
Yeah, if no one's caught on, it's still raining, dammit! I totally haven't gotten used to the frog guy's stink and he's been stealing my chips. So what if he forgot to bring his junk food stash? They're MINE and if one more bag goes missing, I'm going to kick his slimy little...
Ooh! Wait, got a text! "Hey, Stacey, sis told me you're on a totally sweet vaca. Any hot guys? Bring me back a t-shirt. Love, Mom!" God, I hate it when she tries to talk like me. It's so not cool. "Dear Mom, Does Tracey have like a totally warped idea of vaca or were you not listening? Am stuck in a swamp. Only guys around are an invisible dead guy and a frog. Frog wants me dead. Need lipstick or will die. SEND HELP NOW! Ciao ciao, Stacey."
Well, if that doesn't get her attention, I'm totally skipping Life Day next year. Ohmygod. What if I'm stuck here for that? That would so totally bite. I don't even think greenie celebrates Life Day. Well, okay, neither do I, but there are awesome presents and totally sweet parties. Last year, me and the boyfriend totally spent the whole night at the party under...Well, anyway. What does Tracey know about, what was it? "A totally sweet vaca?" She's been on on, like, twice since she got out of school.
I went away to that freak school for bucketheads because I wanted to get out and see the Galaxy. I left all that stupid freaking mud back home and where do I end up? IN MORE MUD! Am I missing something here? Is there some magic way to totally AVOID THE MUD?
I swear, when I get out of here, I'm so going to the beach. I'm going to lay there for a week or something and forget I've ever HEARD of water. You know what I mean?
Okay, enough ranting for one day. I'm going to see if it's stopped raining. Wish me luck!
-----signature-----
"You are some self-important encyclopedia with too much time on his hands. I will see to it personally that you are used for spare parts every time my speeder needs an overhaul. You and that overpriced forklift out there." ~Dr. Bel Maden
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