Author Topic: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 8/13 Epilogue: Beginnings)
amidalachick 
Registered: Aug '03
17663_Mother & Child Art
Date Posted: 5/27 7:06am Subject: RE: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 5/23 Ch. 15: Dead Men's Tales)
Sonar smiled. “I’m going to become the underworld’s worst nightmare.”

Have I ever mentioned that I love Sonar? 'Cause I do.

He shrugged his shoulders, the motion leading into a defensive raise of his hands. “I might have mentioned being the best in CorSec or something, but I mean, that’s a white lie really…”

laugh Oh, Remy.

Now I'm really curious to meet this Taban Maitland guy.

Excellent update, Face, and great PM, too! applause

 

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Thumper09 
Registered: Dec '01
14731_X-Wings
Date Posted: 5/27 7:09pm Subject: RE: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 5/23 Ch. 15: Dead Men's Tales)
I started to point out all my favorite lines in the banter from Sonar and Remy, but there just got to be too many. I think this was my favorite dialogue section in this story so far. grin (Okay, I have to point out that the mail from dead people part was particularly good.)

It's neat to see the beginnings of Sonar's network, and the "playing dead" bit should hopefully work a lot to his advantage like he's expecting. As long as he manages to stay off the radar (er...the sonar?) at least. I'm a bit nervous about Tlach, but if Sonar trusts him then that's good enough for me. wink

LOL, I can't wait to see Remy and Taban interacting.

Great update! Looking forward to more! grin

-Thumper

 

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"Like anything worth writing, it came inexplicably and without method." -Karen Eiffel
The Way--Imperial pilot OCs, OT: http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/28104637
OC X-wing fics: http://www.coronasquadron.com/corona.html
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VaderLVR64 
Title: Fan Fic Manager Digging out from Fay
Registered: Feb '04
24058_Anakin
Date Posted: 5/28 5:05am Subject: RE: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 5/23 Ch. 15: Dead Men's Tales)
Again, your dialogue is just top notch! I always enjoy "hearing" your characters. grin

Remy groaned. “You didn’t even get a look at the shooter?”

“Oh, I got a look. At somebody in a pilot’s uniform, helmet and all. No telling who it was, other than it seemed like a humanoid male. You can check the security footage.”

“Your apartment building doesn’t have a camera system,” Jav said.

“I meant the hidden ones I installed,” Sonar replied as if it should have been obvious. “He had a slugthrower. Shot me right out my window. Fortunately, he didn’t check to make sure he’d finished the job. Or notice that I was wearing a slug-proof vest under my shirt.”

“What were you doing wearing a slug-proof freakin’ vest in the privacy of your own home?” Remy asked.

“I have a thing for preparation. Amazingly, my commlink still worked. Thought for sure that waterproof gizmo was a ripoff. Anyway, Shivalla got my distress signal and patched me up.”

Remy’s brow furrowed. “And you just let us think you were dead?”

“You’re trying to guilt me. I don’t guilt.”

“‘Cause you have no heart.”

Sonar shrugged. “Looked into getting one. Costs too much on today’s market.”


The price of EVERYTHING has gone up! tongue laugh

applause

 

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The_Face 
Title: Fan Fic Manager, now with real butter flavor
Registered: Feb '03
46395_JC: Fan Fiction
Date Posted: 5/28 12:30pm Subject: RE: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 5/23 Ch. 15: Dead Men's Tales) - Date Edited: 5/28 12:35pm (1 edits total) Edited By: The_Face
CF: Shivalla's appeared in The Case (which I really mean to finish some time). She also had a bit part in the non-canon For Hire, and there were references to her in Galaxy Noir III.

I just couldn't write an IT CorSec story and resist the crossover. grin

I'll keep the trenchcoats coming. wink

Raptor: We're into the part of the story where things start coming together in addition to falling apart. tongue

Nat: It just seemed like a Remy kind of thing to do. (Read: dumb.) tongue

Eruanne: Of course it's endearing, Nathan! ...just in a sort of, wanting-to-bash-their-heads-together sort of way.

What other way is there?

Heehee...she reminds me of a certain Messuni Roserain....

Well her intro in Chapter 14 was meant to misdirect that she might be just that - or maybe Azure. I'm tricky like that.

Ale: You have the gift of the prophets! grin Hope you like the result of the meeting.

KELIA: The true moral of Galaxy of Suspects: Honesty is the best policy.

amidalachick: I'm sure Sonar appreciates hearing it regardless. wink

Thumper: Glad you liked the banter. I was excited to get back to it.

I wouldn't say Sonar trusts Tlach, but he trusts in his business sense.

Vadey: laugh Isn't that the way it is?

Everyone: Thanks so much for reading! Update either the end of this week or the beginning of next.

 

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Galaxy of Suspects, a CorSec Mystery: http://boards.theforce.net/Message.aspx?topic=28083207&brd=10476
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Healer_Leona 
Registered: Jul '00
44266_Fan Art - Female Chiss
Date Posted: 6/1 7:04am Subject: RE: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 5/23 Ch. 15: Dead Men's Tales)
“What were you doing wearing a slug-proof freakin’ vest in the privacy of your own home?” Remy asked.


You ask why when he was clearly shot? lol


“All my mail is from dead people,” grumbled Remy.

Sonar cleared his throat. “There’s a catch, I’m afraid.”

“It self-destructs?”

“Don’t be stupid. The files are encrypted. Is there some code you and Benali had while you were working together that might decrypt it?”


I think my favorite part of your weriting is the dialog, I always feel right there with your characters.

 

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The_Face 
Title: Fan Fic Manager, now with real butter flavor
Registered: Feb '03
46395_JC: Fan Fiction
Date Posted: 6/2 6:37am Subject: RE: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 5/23 Ch. 15: Dead Men's Tales)
Leona: Very glad you like the dialogue; it’s one of my main focus points. grin Thank you for reading and replying!





Chapter Sixteen: Local Branches


Kelona 8, 0116
CorSec Droids & Data Office
Correalis, Corellia


Taban Maitland stepped into the darkened office, of which he was the director and sole employee. It was an accordingly small place, cluttered with droids in varying states of completion and repair, and computer terminals of numerous generations. “Tack? Tack, you in here? Not all of us have night vision.” It wasn’t particularly unusual for the droid called Tack to stand in the dark, without regard for the needs of human eyes. It was, however, strange that he should call Taban into the office in the middle of the night.

An imposing droid stepped forward out of the shadows. “I’m present. I assumed you would be indulging your desire to spend a third of your life unconscious.”

“I was,” Taban replied sharply, “until you commed me.”

“I did no such thing,” Tack said.

Arms akimbo, Taban glared up at the droid. “It was only a few minutes ago. You know I hate going outside the apartment with bed-head.”

“My memory exceeds yours exponentially, sir.”

A knock at the door cut off Taban’s retort. The CorSec director turned and, putting a hand on his holster, went to the one-way window in the door’s upper third. He sighed, took his hand from the weapon, and opened the door. “What are you doing here, Diabet?”

“Sorry to trick you here,” Remy said, “but I didn’t think you’d come if you knew it was me.”

Taban brushed long dark hair from his eyes. “Superb deduction.”

“Can we come in?”

Taban looked beyond his fellow Corellian to see the lanky Duro behind him. “Who’s this?”

“Jav Yonx,” he said as he held up a badge in his green hand.

“Put that away,” Remy chided, swatting Jav’s hand like that of a child reaching for a cookie.

The short-statured slicing expert sighed. “Fine.” He stepped aside, and the duo entered the D&D office. Taban flipped the lights on and went into an adjacent room. He returned with a mug of caf in hand. Remy’s eyes jumped immediately to the hot beverage. “Not a chance,” Taban said.

“You’re a small, spiteful man,” Remy informed him calmly.

Jav interrupted, “We need your help.”

“And you knew insults, deceit, and waking me up in the middle of the night are my top three favourite things?” Taban replied.

“I’m sorry,” Remy said. “It’s been a rough week. Coinciding with your arrival…” He turned and looked at Jav.

“As you can see,” the Duro said, “he’s being like this to everyone. It’s quite obnoxious.”

“Jav, why must you make me look a fool in front of all our friends?”

“It’d be my pleasure, but you have making you look like a fool well in hand all by yourself, I assure you.”

“Darn right.”

Taban cleared his throat. “You wanted something?”

The other two cops turned to look at the expert in all things technological, having forgotten about his presence. “Right,” Remy said. “Lately I’ve been working with a cop from Duro, Edairu Benali, on a case against the SynMal Trading Company. You know it?”

“I do.”

“Well, Benali died about five days ago and Jav is here to find out who did it and why. Before he was killed, Benali sent this to me.” Remy produced the datacard Sonar had given him. “A message from the beyond.”

“How grave,” Taban said with a smirk.

“I will shoot you.”

“Before anyone shoots anybody else,” Jav intervened, “we need to decrypt the data on that card, and you can do that.”

Taban took a look over the card. “I could.”

“And what’s it going to take to get you to?” Jav asked.

“Remy is going to tell me I have a superior sense of humour.”

The other Corellian laughed. “That’s the first funny thing I’ve heard you say!”

Taban raised an eyebrow. “Still billing yourself with the ‘real berry flavour’ line?”

“It’s real butter flavor, and your puns are horrendous.”

“You wear jealousy like a neon feather boa, Remy; it just makes you look more ridiculous.”

Jav grabbed Remy’s shoulder before he could form a retort. “A moment?” He dragged Remy to the corner to speak with him away from Taban’s ears or Tack’s auditory receivers. “You’re acting like a child,” he said. “I’m surprised you haven’t started sticking your tongue out yet.”

“Well it’s kind of dry in here.”

“Would you just get over whatever petty personality clash you’ve had in the past with Maitland? People are dead, for Force’s sake. Benali, Kaede, Kavuertes, nearly Sonar. And this datacard might hold the answers to why. Can your ego just step aside long enough for us to find out?”

Remy took a breath. “Okay, I’ll stop feuding with Taban,” he said. He added with a finger pointed at the Duro, “But you owe me a mug of caf.”

Jav rolled his eyes. “Fine.”

Remy turned. “Taban, your sense of humor is superior,” he mumbled unconvincingly.

“I know,” he said. “Come over here, and I’ll show you what’s on this little thing.”

Jav and Remy joined Taban at a computer terminal where he’d inserted the datacard. Tack loomed behind them, a harmless but nonetheless uncomfortable presence lurking in the cops’ peripheral vision. Taban indicated the inscrutable mixture of Aurebesh, numeric, and Basic text. “This is the contents of your card,” he said. “Seems he encrypted it with the impression that you have some kind of idea what you’re doing with a computer.” His fingers dashed nimbly across the keys. Taban smirked triumphantly. “Done and done. Benali sent you an audio file.”

“I don’t suppose it’s his interpretation of ‘Jedi Rocks’?”

“No.” Taban pressed a key and the deceased cop’s voice began to emanate from the machine’s speakers.

“Kelona First. There’s something else here. Bigger than SynMal. If you’re hearing this, Remy, it means I’ve died trying to find out what exactly that bigger thing is. I’m sorry I didn’t bring you in on all this while I was alive, but I didn’t want to endanger you.

“I’ve made contact with SynMal employees, as a rebel-leaning connoisseur of banned books, named Chal Ibanez. They’re very suspicious about new buyers; I’ve been submitted to more questioning than I was when I became a cop. I’m recording this from the home of Natille Kavuertes, as I recover from the wounds I was given in the latest interrogation. Petric Tavil himself cut me up asking if I’m a cop.

“I think I’ve passed; he’s told me about something more interesting than the literature I was looking for. He hasn’t directly said so, but all evidence seems to indicate this is sensitive Imperial data he’s willing to sell me. The asking price implies it’s very important data. If I follow this deal through, we should be able to track the money to establish a definitive link to the Duro busts. And not only that, we’ll be able to charge them with treason, rather than just smuggling or piracy. And maybe out a secret-seller in the Empire.

“Unfortunately, I couldn’t very well requisition credits for this plan – particularly not what Tavil wants. I know a guy, and I’ll leave it at that. I’ll be meeting Tavil at Parking Garage B, the Yellow Section, for the exchange. I just pray he doesn’t find out it’s fake.

“I’m sorry again I didn’t tell you all this before, Remy. May the Force be with you.”

Silence hung over the trio gathered around the terminal. At length, Jav broke it. “And there’s nothing else?”

“Nothing,” Taban confirmed. “He left lots of empty space. I assume for further entries should he live to make them… but he didn’t.”

“Y’ think SynMal is in with Rebels?” Remy asked.

“Hard to say,” Jav replied. “It doesn’t smell like Alliance, but they’re not the only anti-New-Order group out there.” The image of a barcode-tattooed Zabrak in the Duro interrogation room flashed in Jav’s mind.

“Petric Tavil’s looking awfully guilty right now,” Remy remarked.

“Yeah, but he has an alibi,” Jav reminded him. “Security systems all show him being at the SynMal building at the time of death.”

“Well, we haven’t confirmed that. We were still waiting on a warrant when I had to arrest you and we got abducted twice.”

Taban cleared his throat. “Wait, what?

“Nothing important,” Remy assured him. “At any rate, I’d say this warrants a stern
discussion with Tavil and company.”

“Just a couple problems,” Jav said. “I’m a wanted fugitive, and the Royal wants us both dead.”

“He’s a what?” Taban interjected.

“Wanted fugitive,” Tack put in helpfully. “Former Duro Detective Inspector Jav Yonx, wanted for aiding and abetting a fugitive, deserting in the line of duty, and impersonating an officer of the law.”

Jav and Remy stepped backwards, away from the droid and the gaping stare of its owner. “They made your charges all fancy-like,” Remy noted.

“Good of them.”

Taban shook his head to clear the dumb shock from his face. “Remy, you’ve pulled a lot of crap, but…”

“There’s a very reasonable explanation for this,” the younger man said, palms facing Taban. “I’ll tell it to you just as soon as we catch this killer.”

With that, Jav and Remy ran out of the office and into the Correalis night. Taban went to pursue, but when he burst through the doorway, they were nowhere in sight.

Tack came to stand at his side. “And so, the mysterious visitors pass our hero like ships in the night. Where this strange pair of wanted man and loose cannon cop are sailing, who can tell? And would we ever see them again, or are they but gues–”

“Tack,” Taban interrupted. “You’re doing it again.”

******

Kelona 7, 2034 Local Time
The Ministry of Exploration and Colonization Main Office
Imperial Center


Hyram Griffoteth hiked his belt up around his sizable gut. His pants had grown too large lately; he was losing weight at an alarming rate. Somewhere along the line, his appetite had abandoned him. Now he ate mostly as a social function or purely out of a longstanding thrice-daily habit. He collapsed into his chair, eliciting a squeak from the metal parts below. Another late evening at the office. Considering how early his wife left in the mornings for her job, they’d not been both conscious together in nearly a week.

Thank the Force for small blessings, he thought.

Griffoteth pulled his necktie off and folded it neatly in a desk drawer. He pressed a button, and began to speak. “Miss Elamare, I have some messages to dictate. Please come into my office.”

The puffy-faced Imperial stood again, and went to a refrigerated cabinet. Two rows of wine bottles looked back at him. He heard the office door slide open. “Would you prefer the Alderaanian or the Hapan?”

A male voice answered. “I only drink mineral water.”

Griffoteth whirled around. Standing in his doorway was a Duro man, in a sleek dark gray uniform with no rank – or indeed, any ornamentation at all. It seemed an almost monastic garment, suitable for a martial artist if he’d been wearing slippers rather than heavy mud-crusted boots. The Duro regarded Griffoteth coolly, showing no emotion in his lipless mouth or large alien eyes.

“Y- You can’t be in here,” the bureaucrat protested. “Where’s your identification?”

A smirk played at one edge of the Duro’s mouth. He reached into a pocket that had seemed invisible before. His gray-green fingers held like a hand of cards nearly a dozen different badges, ranging from TIE pilot to Intelligence agent to Senator. “I have many identities. You have two yourself, Hyram,” he said. Putting the IDs away, he held out his hands. “A flimsi-pusher in a largely defunct division of government, and a flimsi-pusher in the most vital project in the Empire. How was your visit to the Maw?”

Griffoteth pressed the button on his desk again. Static emitted from a speaker there.

The stranger stepped slowly into the office. “They can’t hear you, Hyram. Your security’s signal is being blocked, and your secretary-mistress is dead.” The Duro reached behind his back and produced a slugthrower. “No one can hear you.”

“Oh Force…”

“On your knees, please.”

“What?”

“Don’t make me hear that word again. On your knees.”

Tears welling in his eyes, he got down onto his knees and stared up at the alien. “Why are you doing this?” Griffoteth rasped. “Who are you?”

The intruder calmly affixed a silencer to the barrel. “Why. Because you just can’t trust anyone these days – Miss Elamare included. Because your bedroom banter includes Imperial defense secrets.” With great care, the Duro cocked the antique weapon. “Because your idiocy, Hyram, has forced me to kill innocents.” He aimed the pistol at full arm’s length. “And I’ll kill more yet. As to the latter question–”

He fired in the middle of his sentence. The Imperial fell dead with a hole between his bloodshot green eyes – still waiting expectantly for the answer.

“–Call me Yonx.”





NEXT: Causes


A/N: The city of Correalis, and the characters Taban and Tack, are the creations of Luton_Plunder. You can read more about them in his series “The User”. Also, a special thank you to Luton for beta-reading the scene featuring his characters.

 

-----signature-----
If mercy falls upon the broken and the poor
Dear Father, I will see you there
on distant shores
*
Galaxy of Suspects, a CorSec Mystery: http://boards.theforce.net/Message.aspx?topic=28083207&brd=10476
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NYCitygurl 
Title: Manager of SFFBC, C&G, and NSWFF
Registered: Jul '02
46395_JC: Fan Fiction
Date Posted: 6/2 6:54am Subject: RE: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 6/2 Ch. 16: Local Branches)
“How grave,” Taban said with a smirk.

“I will shoot you.”


I love the chapter!! The first section cracked me up - I love Taban and Tack happy

 

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Laine_Snowtrekker 
Registered: Jul '03
41669_Leia Organa
Date Posted: 6/2 9:00am Subject: RE: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 6/2 Ch. 16: Local Branches)
Awesome two chapters! Your dialogue and witty banter are just superb.

 

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Stealth and subtlety work well, but for making lasting impressions, a blaster does just fine. -Han
Room full of gold and jewels, and Dr. Daniel Jackson finds the one book. -Cam
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Raptor517 
Registered: Sep '06
42234_Venator-Class Star Destroyer
Date Posted: 6/2 12:34pm Subject: RE: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 6/2 Ch. 16: Local Branches)
Tack came to stand at his side. “And so, the mysterious visitors pass our hero like ships in the night. Where this strange pair of wanted man and loose cannon cop are sailing, who can tell? And would we ever see them again, or are they but gues–”

“Tack,” Taban interrupted. “You’re doing it again.”


lol. laugh Great update.

Raptor517

 

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Luton_Plunder 
Registered: Jun '06
41202_Scout Trooper
Date Posted: 6/3 6:34am Subject: RE: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 6/2 Ch. 16: Local Branches)
Face's Long Overdue Reply to Galaxy of Suspects.

So I settled in, put on Tank! by Yoko Kanno, and began anew from the prologue...


Prologue


The prologue is a very tight piece of writing that was littered with things to get me excited about the story grin Not the least of which was, of course, the appearance of some of my favourite characters. And a nice time-travellin' cliffhanger there, too. The Noir style holds up so well in Star Wars, especially when you are at the reigns.

Excellent start!


Prologue 2

I might have already mentioned Synth's taking two seconds to think about it and declaring it long enough to be one of my favourite Synth moments ever. It just sums him up extremely well. It was also brilliant to see Barcode back grin And running circles around his interrogator, too, hah.

And the genesis of Jav Yonx - Private Investigator was very nicely done, too. Like I said about the first one, the entire story is very tightly written. It reminds me of, strangely enough, the movie 'Hot Fuzz'. Edited together so as not to waste a second of film. Nice. And anything that reminds me of Hut Fuzz gets a billion LP points tongue



Chapter 1


I love Remy's way of coming up with comebacks in his head!

And the intro to Sonar was wonderful, too. Everything about all of these introductions is great - perfect for them, especially given what we know about them already. And the descriptions of Bortelles CorSec were brilliantly done - I love the corruption element. And the Humanoid-Jerk relations line!

On with the adventures grin


Chapter 2

Meih's line about being half-qualified and half-caring was a great one. I actually nodded in approval, haha.

The CSI exit lines are going to be one of my favourite parts too, I wager.

More Synth awesomeness here too. I just can't wait for the inevitable confrontations.


Chapter 3

Hahahh, I love the idea of setting a blaster to 'trifle' laugh

More CSI-grade humour. If only Jav could put on and remove a pair of sunglasses some ridiculous amount of times, things would be perfect. Though you know, as far as keeping the relevant facts of the case together these little CSI moments actually serve a really useful purpose. If you can sum up a complicated little sequence of events with a single quip, then all the more awesome. Kudos for finding a line like that to walk wink

And the passage with the royal has got to be one of the best things I've read here. You've painted him a fantastic pastiche of crazy and ruthless, all backed up by that 'you know it makes sense' kind of villain logic. I can't describe how much I loved this part.

On with the show!


Chapter 4

I love the disturbing side facts. I'm loving all this Corellian lore being developed.

The doctor for hire was a great character, and I can't wait to find out where Benali was getting his sabrecat money from. Also, the little passages with the Royal are endearing themselves to me greatly. The fact that he's needy in a relationship is a brilliant little character twist tongue

And oh! More resignations! Though now, Sonar can concentrate on fulfilling the future we know he has wink


Chapter 5

Hey! Division 29 grin I think I'll write an episode one day laugh

I really believed Remy and Sonar's friendship here, well done - sometimes it can be hard to write honest friendship. And in the next passage, what masterful misdirection with the opening line of plunging the knife into the heart tongue that murderous ol' Meih Diabet, huh?

And brilliant description on the attack on Sonar. Like the rest of the story, very tight. I wonder who could be responsible for this atrocity! I hope that OC knows that you do not go shooting Sonar into the sea, not while I'm a reader.


Chapter 6

I loved the pantomimed stabbing, and Kaede interrupting him, hahah. A nice way to bring the scene to life.

Haha, Carthey Machwilliam did have hunches tongue Thief is also a cool little animal. I was very impressed with Remy's reaction to his bark laugh

And what's in the box :o This is quite possibly my favourite 'Noir to date grin


Chapter 7

Jav posted:
"It's a duraplast package, but that's not important right now. What we need to find out is what's inside."


Oh my, YES. These are the words that bring mirth laugh

I love that the password to the datacard is realbutterflavor. Excellent grin It was good to see the humble origins of Sonar, too - It's very easy to see how he grew into the powerhouse of later Noirs. And lets hear it for Jav with the Life Insurance line, huh? Awww Yieah.


Chapter 8

Wow, I read this whole chapter before writing a single word because I was so engrossed grin From the beginning to the end this was awesome detective story stuff. Remy's meeting, the reveal that Tresler had been made, Riff's call through to Kaede - and finally to her unfortunate and actually surprisingly moving death :o I didn't think I'd grown so attached to her character, so kudos for that.

This is a strange spot to leave it, but I'm so very tired and need to sleep tongue I will catch up on the next 8 chapters in much the same manner shortly! I'm thoroughly back for this story Face, and would love PM updates to resume with their great regularity wink

 

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Grand_Admiral_Grant 
Title: Ex-Mod
Registered: Nov '04
7883_Tycho
Date Posted: 6/3 12:39pm Subject: RE: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 6/2 Ch. 16: Local Branches) - Date Edited: 6/3 12:40pm (1 edits total) Edited By: Grand_Admiral_Grant
applause

Very well done, Im still reading up but it's great work.

 

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KELIA 
Title: Host: 20 Ques
Bet Your Knowledge
PT Rewrite

Registered: Jul '05
43252_Anakin Skywalker
Date Posted: 6/4 3:34am Subject: RE: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 6/2 Ch. 16: Local Branches)
Tack came to stand at his side. “And so, the mysterious visitors pass our hero like ships in the night. Where this strange pair of wanted man and loose cannon cop are sailing, who can tell? And would we ever see them again, or are they but gues–”

laugh laugh laugh laugh

Tack makes Threepio look like joy to be around.

But I like him!!

I hope Remy and Jav make some progress soon. The body count is getting awfully high worried worried

Great update

applause applause applause applause

 

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A Light In The Darkness: http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/28150602/p1/?8
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Thumper09 
Registered: Dec '01
14731_X-Wings
Date Posted: 6/4 12:35pm Subject: RE: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 6/2 Ch. 16: Local Branches)
Aw, man, and here I thought I was safe from Taban's puns. tongue

Great job with the interactions between Remy, Jav, Taban and Tack! They really fit together seamlessly, and it was fun seeing them all together. happy


“They made your charges all fancy-like,” Remy noted.

LOL. I loved this line. grin And Tack's little summary at the end.

There was lots of interesting info in Benali's Message From Beyond. So that's how and why the fake credits entered the picture, as well as the cuts he had gotten. There are still a bunch of questions to answer, though.

...including some new questions with Hyram, too!


“–Call me Yonx.”

Whoa. Wha--? shock

I have a thought on this, though I'll have to wait and see if it's right... thinking

Great update! applause

-Thumper

 

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Jedi_Eruanne 
Registered: Jun '05
23762_Padme
Date Posted: 6/4 4:41pm Subject: RE: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 6/2 Ch. 16: Local Branches)
First off, I LOVE Tack! And Taban makes me laugh. Secondly, Jav Yonx is being set up. Oh dear. Thirdly, I have to runnnnnn!

 

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VaderLVR64 
Title: Fan Fic Manager Digging out from Fay
Registered: Feb '04
24058_Anakin
Date Posted: 6/5 6:02am Subject: RE: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 6/2 Ch. 16: Local Branches)
Witty dialogue...as usual! grin

“Well, Benali died about five days ago and Jav is here to find out who did it and why. Before he was killed, Benali sent this to me.” Remy produced the datacard Sonar had given him. “A message from the beyond.”

“How grave,” Taban said with a smirk.

“I will shoot you.”


I love these characters and how they interact with each other! applause

 

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