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Author	Topic: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 8/13 Epilogue: Beginnings)
Thumper09 Registered: Dec '01	Date Posted: 6/27 6:00pm Subject: RE: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 6/25 Ch. 19: Standoffs)
	Ah, here come the explosions. The Corellian glanced back at him. “You’d drop me on the trust fall, wouldn’t you?” “Yes.” “I suppose it’s a kind of trust to know that you would.” “Not really.” “What has you so standoffish?” “It’s probably the standoff we’re in.” I laughed much too hard at this part, hee hee. I just received word that my sources have been killed. His sources... hmm... Like a certain bureaucrat and his secretary? Pondering... Nothing like a bomb going off to effectively break a standoff, huh? “Please, don’t stop knowing it all now on my account,” Shivalla said. Heh, nice line. I wonder if Synth actually doesn't know or simply doesn't want to tell her. Note to self: Do NOT mess with Greeres. Ever. I get the feeling that the bomb going off was only the beginning of the chaos and that things are going to get worse before they get better. Man, DaRusso's not having a good time of things lately. Of course, neither are Remy and Jav. Shivalla looked up from the file to the smoke rising from the SynMal site. “His father.” Whoa. There goes my "impersonate and frame Jav while he's missing" theory. But this just generated a whole slew of questions about Jav and his father, like if Jav thinks his father is dead like the record says he is, and how Gan got involved with all this to begin with. Great post, and congratulations on your award noms! -Thumper -----signature----- "Like anything worth writing, it came inexplicably and without method." -Karen Eiffel The Way--Imperial pilot OCs, OT: http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/28104637 OC X-wing fics: http://www.coronasquadron.com/corona.html
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The_Face Title: Fan Fic Manager Up Up and Away Registered: Feb '03	Date Posted: 6/28 8:53am Subject: RE: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 6/25 Ch. 19: Standoffs)
	ale: Synth’s a load of fun to write. He’s got an ego, but the fun part is that it’s deserved. Sorry! I was putting the subject line in and I had a premature misfire of the PM. It uh it happens to lots of guys… Eruanne: Shivalla is proof I apparently can’t go long without a kick-butt woman helping the detectives. Raptor: Glad you approve; it was a mess to figure out. KELIA: Cliffies are an occupational hazard. A very prevalent one. As are plot twists. Thumper: Laughing “too” hard? That’s umpossible! His sources... hmm... Like a certain bureaucrat and his secretary? Note to self: Do NOT mess with Greeres. Ever. Awwww yeah. EVERYONE: As always, a big thankyou for reading and replying! You're all wonderful. Nice mystery people: Thank you very much for the Saga nominations! This very fic has qualified for Best Action, Best Male OC (Remy Diabet), and Best Non-human (Jav Yonx), and Braken Starblaster, Space Attorney is up for Best Humor. I really appreciate it. More death, destruction, and revelations will be up Tuesday-ish. I hope. -----signature----- If mercy falls upon the broken and the poor Dear Father, I will see you there on distant shores * Galaxy of Suspects, a CorSec Mystery: http://boards.theforce.net/Message.aspx?topic=28083207&brd=10476
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amidalachick Registered: Aug '03	Date Posted: 6/28 1:02pm Subject: RE: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 6/25 Ch. 19: Standoffs)
	The Corellian glanced back at him. “You’d drop me on the trust fall, wouldn’t you?” “Yes.” “I suppose it’s a kind of trust to know that you would.” “Not really.” Actually, I kind of agree with Remy. Explosion, yay! It's going to be interesting to see what happens in the aftermath... Loved the whole section with Shivalla, Synth, and Meih. And this... Shivalla looked up from the file to the smoke rising from the SynMal site. “His father.” I did not expect that! Another excellent post, Face, and congrats again on your noms! -----signature----- "You can go your own way (Go your own way) You can call it another lonely day You can go your own way Go your own way..."
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Healer_Leona Registered: Jul '00	Date Posted: 6/29 6:48am Subject: RE: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 6/25 Ch. 19: Standoffs)
	Vacation put me a bit behind again, but I'm back catching up. -----signature----- So leave the ways that are making you be What you really don't want to be
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VaderLVR64 Title: Fan Fic Manager Buried Under Boxes Registered: Feb '04	Date Posted: 7/2 1:25pm Subject: RE: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 6/25 Ch. 19: Standoffs)
	I'm not sure how you're keeping everyone and everyTHING straight, but you are! I shall try to keep up! This is a BIG story in every sense of the word. And I'm enjoying it! The Corellian glanced back at him. “You’d drop me on the trust fall, wouldn’t you?” “Yes.” “I suppose it’s a kind of trust to know that you would.” “Not really.” “What has you so standoffish?” “It’s probably the standoff we’re in.” “Ah. Yes. That would do it.” -----signature----- If you have to choose between tears and laughter, remember that laughter burns more calories. They call me NANA Vader. At least she doesn't lack confidence...
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Laine_Snowtrekker Registered: Jul '03	Date Posted: 7/3 1:05pm Subject: RE: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 6/25 Ch. 19: Standoffs)
	Great post! Thanks for the PM. -----signature----- Stealth and subtlety work well, but for making lasting impressions, a blaster does just fine. -Han Room full of gold and jewels, and Dr. Daniel Jackson finds the one book. -Cam Palso's #1 Fan JO: RS1, Admiral Fanfic link in bio (esp. 08 Diary Challenge)
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The_Face Title: Fan Fic Manager Up Up and Away Registered: Feb '03	Date Posted: 7/3 1:35pm Subject: RE: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 6/25 Ch. 19: Standoffs)
	’chick: Yeah, once in a butter-flavored while, Remy makes a point. Thanks for R&Ring! Leona: Hope you’ve enjoyed your vacation! Thankyou for reading and replying! Vadey: Well, I have help in the form of a handful of Word files (a timeline, a current-status sheet of the characters, general ideas, etc.) to manage it all. Very glad you’re enjoying it! Laine: Thank you very much, and no problem. Chapter Twenty: Effects Kelona 8, 1815 SynMal Trading Company Bortelles Branch Bortelles, Corellia Surrounded by old buildings built with stone and steel, the SynMal tower’s gleaming transparisteel design had always been out of place in Bortelles. Now, however, it was not a gleaming dagger jutting up over the riverside skyline, but a huge cloud of smoke. The bomb had been planted in key areas around its foundation, by way of the Selonian-populated underground tunnels that ran beneath many Corellian areas. The upper levels, where Jav and Remy had been facing off with Petric Tavil, were otherwise unharmed as the first three floors collapsed under the weight of those above. Tons of transparisteel and durasteel were for a moment suspended in air, before crashing onto what little remained of the tower base. From the initial blast, a ripple ran up the building, shattering transparisteel as it went. In Tavil’s office, they could feel the weight shift before it actually began toppling. Everything in the room not secured to a wall, ceiling, or floor, took flight – including the occupants. Shards of transparisteel floated past Jav, twinkling in the light of a setting sun’s last rays. There was impact. Durasteel shuddered, wood cracked, and Jav could hear turbolift cables snapping. Though the tower had stopped falling, they continued to drop. Jav felt a sudden pain hit his shoulder blade. He threw his arm out. Long green fingers found a surviving durasteel rod that had framed the window he was now hanging out of. He looked down at the Petchuck River below. Tavil’s wooden desk hit the wall – now a floor – beside him, and its owner followed. One of the SynMal guards plunged past Jav and into the churning water. Remy and the other guard fell onto the wall on Jav’s right. The SynMal tower – or what remained of it – had now fallen halfway across the river. At the ninth floor, the imposing duracrete river lock had stopped its fall. The five floors beyond that, including Tavil’s office, were hanging precariously on the other side of the lock, far above the river. The entire building was at approximately a 70% angle. And though it had stopped falling for now, the rumbles and cracks of architecture shifting were clear, even over the roar of the water through the lock. Remy was the first to stand – albeit with all the balance of a drunk. He staggered on the uneven floor, nearly falling as he picked up his dark fedora. He held it up, looking at the shards of transparisteel stuck in its brim. He moved to brush them free but stopped his hand. In the reflection on one, he could see the Rodian SynMal guard rushing at his back. Remy stumbled to the right – downhill – letting the guard’s fist pass by him harmlessly. The Rodian whirled around, throwing an elbow at Remy. Still moving as if inebriated, the Corellian dodged the strike. The guard’s arm straightened to deliver the side of his hand into Remy’s throat. Still clutching the hat in his hands, he fell clumsily onto his back, and the Rodian’s blow sailed overhead. He continued to turn, revealing the knife he wielded in his other hand. Remy’s eyes widened with panic on seeing the blade. He flicked his fedora in the guard’s direction, launching bits of transparisteel. The Rodian screamed. His back arched, chest thrown out, head back, he flopped to the floor. Hands like claws, he clutched at his face, where a number of shards had landed. The largest jutted out just beneath his left eye. Remy, still on his back, reached out his leg to kick away the dropped knife. Carefully donning the hat, Remy got back onto his feet – and bearings. “Jav,” he announced with concern, “we’re on the wall.” He looked around the office again. “Jav?” “I know. Down here.” Remy went to the window, and found Jav dangling there by his left hand, his right hand holding the sawed-off blaster rifle. “Jav, the river.” “Yeah. I know. Help me up.” He held up the weapon, which Remy took and set aside. They reached for each other’s hands now. No sooner had Remy grabbed hold of Jav’s than he felt cool metal raise the hairs on the back of his neck. Behind him stood Petric Tavil, with Jav’s rifle in hand and aimed at the Corellian. “Come on,” Jav complained, “pull!” Tavil joined Remy in looking down at the Duro. “Oh,” Jav said. “Quite,” agreed Tavil. “Let go of his hand.” Neither ex-cop moved. “Let go or I blast away the only thing keeping your air-filled head from floating away.” Remy raised both hands in surrender. Tavil stepped around to his side, keeping the rifle on him. He also crouched by the window where the grip of Jav’s three fingers was all that remained between him and the long deadly drop. “DI Yonx,” he said. “I’m not going to lie. Under no circumstances could we have ever been friends. But I will feel bad after killing you. And that’s more than most of my victims get.” He held up his blatantly mechanical gold hand. Tiny needles extended from his fingertips, which he then slid slowly across Jav’s arm. Remy stared at the resulting blood. He’d seen those kind of cuts before. Memory of Benali’s autopsy flashed through his mind. Tavil’s own body was the weapon that Meih had been unable to identify. Jav, meanwhile, winced against the excruciating pain. Blood slowly ran down his arm, which was already tingling from holding his weight. His fingers felt distant and weak. A bead of sweat ran down through the blood. His grasp began to slip. The office door – now halfway up the wall – swooshed open. A man slid through it and landed beside the still moaning Rodian. Muerban Mannox’s red eyes landed on Tavil and Remy. He fired a blaster bolt into the injured guard’s head without breaking his stride, or even looking. His blaster came next to aim at Tavil. The businessman stood, and shifted the rifle from Remy’s head to Mannox’s. “Please listen to me. We are not enemies,” Tavil said. “You’re being used. All the Royal’s men, you all are being played. Why do you think you’ve been sent here?” “You know why,” Mannox replied. Tavil started to say something, then stopped to look at the hitman’s expression. “Oh Force, did… Did they kill Katyana?” Mannox said nothing, but it was enough to confirm Tavil’s suspicions. “You have to understand. My company has been set up – just like everything about this week. SynMal has been targeted for elimination, and the Royal’s organization is the weapon. Killing Katyana is how they’re pulling the trigger.” “And who might ‘they’ be?” Mannox asked. A slightly bemused smirk tugged at his otherwise alien eyeless expression. Tavil’s heart, breathing, and words all rushed. “That’s just it; the shadow gov-…” All three slowed. He looked down at the hole in his suit jacket where Mannox had shot him. Tavil fell to his knees, dropping the rifle with a clatter. He swayed there with life rapidly leaving him. The needles on his cyborg hand’s fingers retracted and extended spastically, and the fingers themselves twitched in unnatural positions. Tavil’s eyes locked with Remy, and he saw the raw fear on the criminal’s eyes. Tavil finally finished falling into a heap from which he moved no more. Mannox’s cybernetic eyes flicked next to the unarmed CorSec detective crouched by what had been a window. Kaede had a clear shot. She fired. As did Mannox. The assassin nodded slowly as he approached Remy. “Kaede. Kaede!” There was no response. Remy’s eyes were wide open, staring over her shoulder, as he cradled the dead woman against him. Mannox and Remy locked eyes. The cop’s lit up with a fire Mannox had seen in dozens of people whose loved ones he’d killed. Mannox’s eyes, meanwhile, remained as ever uniform pools of crimson. “So, kid. What are you gonna do?” ****** Kelona 8, 1821 Underground Metro Line Green Station (defunct) & Location Moving Correalis, Corellia & Bortelles, Corellia The Sonar Man jammed a finger into his ear. He worked it around in hopes of clearing the passage. “Okay, say that again?” Through the commlink, Shivalla’s voice came again. “The slugthrower that killed Benali – the slugthrower that shot you... It’s registered to DS Gan Yonx.” Sonar typed furiously at one of three keyboards before him. One of the five monitors instantly displayed all the information on Gan Yonx within the Duro police department’s database. “Shivalla, Gan is…” “Jav’s father. His father did it.” “Yes. He’s also dead.” “Okay, his dead father did it.” “No. No no that’s not right.” She shrugged. “Dead people are generally more law-abiding than that, but I mean, we can’t stereotype. You’re dead, and you break laws.” “Yes, but I’m exceptional among my demographic. Wait, I’m getting something. Tlach has sent me the information on the death of Katyana Ryred.” “Isn’t that the Royal’s wife? When did she die?” “About two and a half hours ago, seems,” Sonar replied as grainy crime scene pictures taken by way of Tlach’s visor appeared on one of his screens. “These cuts are wrong. They don’t match those Tavil gave Benali, but they were clearly made with the intention to look like them. And this slug… Oh bless you, Tlach, you homicidal nutjob, he sent me the slug data. It’s a match, for Gan Yonx’s weapon.” Shivalla frowned. “Why would Gan Yonx kill Katyana Ryred?” “Why would anyone kill Katyana Ryred? To get to her husband. And more importantly, why would one frame Petric Tavil for it? To get the Royal to kill Tavil and everyone he knows.” Shivalla groaned. “I’m getting a headache. Isn’t Yonx an ex-cop? Why come back from the dead to kill you, Benali, and Tavil? What’s his motive?” “The death records for Yonx are extensive,” said Sonar. “I’m looking at his autopsy photos, witnesses, and a half-dozen other things. He was killed by a weaponized virus created by a particularly insane criminal. Who then committed suicide… with a slugthrower.” “So what are you saying?” “I’m saying people this dead don’t fake it. And I’m saying doctors trained at the Norchester Medical University of Coruscant who’ve turned to weaponizing viruses have access to a thousand painless suicide aids at their disposal. Or at least a proper blaster pistol. But they do not use something as painful and uncivilized as a slugthrower to end their own lives. “Someone,” Sonar continued, “is using Gan Yonx’s weapon as a dead end to prevent their crimes from being traced back to them. Someone who’s been doing this for a long time. Someone who took revenge on Gan’s behalf. Someone close to Gan. Or close to Jav.” ****** Kelona 8, 1822 SynMal Trading Company Bortelles Branch & Bortelles CorSec Primary Bortelles, Corellia Synth squeezed off two shots before ducking back behind cover – which in this case was a meter-high, three-meter long section of wall that was still standing after the explosion. Return fire from SynMal security hit the ground where he’d just been. He turned and shot down a Royal-employed Bith on his other side. The Imperial investigator grabbed his commlink and put it to his ear. “Director Kolne!” “Greeres.” “Where’s Kolne?” On the other end, Greeres glanced over his horn-rimmed glasses at Kolne’s unconscious form, handcuffed to a vent grating on the other side of the office. “He’s indisposed. Consider me Interim Interim Director. What is it, Lydon?” “We need reinforcements down here, badly. We just lost Grady, and the Royal’s men seem endless. You are redirecting resources and officers purposefully away from where they are needed. I am prepared to relieve you of command, but first I want to know why. And be aware,” Synth said, shooting a SynMal employee in the head, “I will know if you are lying.” Greeres hesitated. He’d seen Synth interviewing persons of interest in Yonx’s apparent abduction. There was no hiding from him, and if he tried he would lose control again. And that meant losing them. He sighed. “Lydon… He has my daughters.” NEXT: Collisions -----signature----- If mercy falls upon the broken and the poor Dear Father, I will see you there on distant shores * Galaxy of Suspects, a CorSec Mystery: http://boards.theforce.net/Message.aspx?topic=28083207&brd=10476
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Jedi_Eruanne Registered: Jun '05	Date Posted: 7/3 11:48pm Subject: RE: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 7/3 Ch. 20: Effects)
	HOLY! WHAT THE! FREAKIN'! AUGH! is too confused Nathan! Your plot twists have plot twists!!!!!!!! Ahem, on a side note: Awesome Post!!! tackle hugs I am faaar too tired to give you an extensive review, but I muchos likey! -----signature----- <><Jedi Knight For Christ><> Links to Fics in Profile---go check em out! Loyal Reader of Quiet_Mandalorian. MystralGurl's CRAZY Evil Twin (mwuhahahaha) Have you hugged your evil twin today?
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Corellian_Ale Registered: Mar '08	Date Posted: 7/5 8:19am Subject: RE: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 7/3 Ch. 20: Effects)
	Most excellent update Face!!! “Someone,” Sonar continued, “is using Gan Yonx’s weapon as a dead end to prevent their crimes from being traced back to them. Someone who’s been doing this for a long time. Someone who took revenge on Gan’s behalf. Someone close to Gan. Or close to Jav.” I have my theories...all of which are very conspiritory in nature. Btw, congrats on very well deserved nominations my friend! -ale -----signature----- Dath Writer's Block stands at the end of my bed while I sleep and laughs... Proud Master to MsLanna ...
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Thumper09 Registered: Dec '01	Date Posted: 7/5 7:32pm Subject: RE: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 7/3 Ch. 20: Effects)
	So you're no longer content with mere cliffhangers, huh, Face? Now you've got to have buildinghangers too? “Jav,” he announced with concern, “we’re on the wall.” This wins my "favorite line from this post" award, LOL. I'd been wondering if those cuts on Katyana were a setup. Of course, that was based only on the single piece of knowledge that Tavil used the cuts to try to get Benali to talk, and nothing about Katyana's situation and death seemed like an interrogation happened there. The later, second piece of knowledge, when Tavil used his claws on Jav, made me second-guess that theory for a while because I could tell he used them for sadistic purposes too. That seemed more in line with what happened with Katyana. From his reaction with Mannox, though, Tavil appeared to be truthful. And what was that cut-off word? A shadow government? Hmm... That was very inconvenient timing on Mannox's part. “So, kid. What are you gonna do?” That's what I wanna know too. “Dead people are generally more law-abiding than that, but I mean, we can’t stereotype. You’re dead, and you break laws.” “Yes, but I’m exceptional among my demographic. These were awesome lines as well. Gan's story just got a lot more twisted with what Sonar discovered. I'm really curious to see what's up with all of that and who's behind it. And I want to see how Synth is going to react to what Greeres just told him. Great update! I'm looking forward to more. -Thumper -----signature----- "Like anything worth writing, it came inexplicably and without method." -Karen Eiffel The Way--Imperial pilot OCs, OT: http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/28104637 OC X-wing fics: http://www.coronasquadron.com/corona.html
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KELIA Title: Host: 20 Ques Bet Your Knowledge PT Rewrite Registered: Jul '05	Date Posted: 7/6 2:42pm Subject: RE: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 7/3 Ch. 20: Effects) - Date Edited: 7/6 2:43pm (1 edits total) Edited By: KELIA
	His fingers felt distant and weak. A bead of sweat ran down through the blood. His grasp began to slip. “So, kid. What are you gonna do?” “Someone,” Sonar continued, “is using Gan Yonx’s weapon as a dead end to prevent their crimes from being traced back to them. Someone who’s been doing this for a long time. Someone who took revenge on Gan’s behalf. Someone close to Gan. Or close to Jav.” “Lydon… He has my daughters.” Are you aiming for the “most evil cliffies in a single post” award or something? ‘Cause if you are, as far as I’m concerned, you win. Now stop it already! And hurry and update while you’re at it. I’m not good with suspense…unless of course, I’m the one writing it. Great update -----signature----- "Do or do not, there is no try." Master Yoda A Light In The Darkness: http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/28150602/p1/?8 Undue Circumstances: http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/28530583/p1/?10
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Healer_Leona Registered: Jul '00	Date Posted: 7/7 4:47am Subject: RE: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 7/3 Ch. 20: Effects)
	She shrugged. “Dead people are generally more law-abiding than that, but I mean, we can’t stereotype. You’re dead, and you break laws.” You are master of both humor and cliffies here. One sec you got me chuckling and then next I'm fretting for the characters. Excellent pst!! : -----signature----- So leave the ways that are making you be What you really don't want to be
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VaderLVR64 Title: Fan Fic Manager Buried Under Boxes Registered: Feb '04	Date Posted: 7/7 5:19am Subject: RE: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 7/3 Ch. 20: Effects)
	I think I need to start taking notes. This was AWESOME! Sonar typed furiously at one of three keyboards before him. One of the five monitors instantly displayed all the information on Gan Yonx within the Duro police department’s database. “Shivalla, Gan is…” “Jav’s father. His father did it.” “Yes. He’s also dead.” “Okay, his dead father did it.” “No. No no that’s not right.” As always, the dialogue is top notch! -----signature----- If you have to choose between tears and laughter, remember that laughter burns more calories. They call me NANA Vader. At least she doesn't lack confidence...
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The_Face Title: Fan Fic Manager Up Up and Away Registered: Feb '03	Date Posted: 7/8 7:48am Subject: RE: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 7/3 Ch. 20: Effects)
	Eruanne: “Your plot twists have plot twists”, I love that description so much! ale: Ah, but conspiritory and paranoid are the best theories of all! Thumper: Excellent sleuthing! I’m kind of trying something a little different here as the mystery is still unfolding even during the climax whereas past stories have generally lead up to a reveal separate from and preceding the climax proper. I have mixed opinions on how it’s working out, but hey. KELIA: You see right through me! Leona: Scary should go hand in hand with funny more often IMHO. Vadey: There will be a test on this, you know! Thank you for reading and replying, everyone! -----signature----- If mercy falls upon the broken and the poor Dear Father, I will see you there on distant shores * Galaxy of Suspects, a CorSec Mystery: http://boards.theforce.net/Message.aspx?topic=28083207&brd=10476
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amidalachick Registered: Aug '03	Date Posted: 7/9 10:59am Subject: RE: Galaxy Noir: Galaxy of Suspects (A CorSec Mystery - 7/3 Ch. 20: Effects)
	Wow. Awesome, awesome post! If I quoted my favorite lines, I'd be quoting the whole thing. -----signature----- "You can go your own way (Go your own way) You can call it another lonely day You can go your own way Go your own way..."
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