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Tender Shadows (USJS OCs; ROTS/IT; drama, action, romance) - Updated 10.11.08
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Trika_Kenobi
Registered:
Nov '99
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Date Posted:
8/28 8:57pm
Subject:
RE: Tender Shadows (USJS OCs; ROTS/IT; drama, action, romance) - Updated 8.28.08 - Chap. 31: Guilt
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Ahhh... so many varied emotions with this update. Balancing the reactions and experiencing both extremes has been interesting. For, as you've stated, for whatever we are, we are still trapped in this mortal flesh with all of the burdens of conscience. Despite training to keep the heart at bay, Jedi aren't likely to get rid of any of it so easily. 
You've woven a fascinating tale that grows deeper and stronger with each update. I'm intrigued the more I read and more impressed with each and every update. Thank you!
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Talon Intelligence Squadron: Assaulting Good Sense and Order Since Y2K http://www.TalonIntelligenceSquadron.com proud oldbie master to GIRLSOLO 
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earlybird-obi-wan
Registered:
Aug '06
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Date Posted:
8/28 9:03pm
Subject:
RE: Tender Shadows (USJS OCs; ROTS/IT; drama, action, romance) - Updated 8.28.08 - Chap. 31: Guilt
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Lovely chapter with Kemin and Koria.
Poor Kemin, having to lose his hand.
And loved that interaction between the three Rimstars.
Great update 
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writer and Star Wars fan
FANART [link=http://boards.theforce.net/fan_art/b10020/25793899]fanart[/link]
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Musical-Wingstar
Registered:
Mar '08
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Date Posted:
9/4 9:17pm
Subject:
RE: Tender Shadows (USJS OCs; ROTS/IT; drama, action, romance) - Updated 8.28.08 - Chap. 31: Guilt
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Trika: Yeah, without the heart, even a Jedi can't live... gotta pump that blood somehow.
Earlybird: Yeah, but Kemin gets a cool mech hand. 
You'll see more of the Rimstars later. 
Chapter 32: Confrontation
As Koria drifted off to sleep, a sudden thought jolted her awake. Kemin thought he had driven me to a dark side action, but it was all me. I’m the one who killed Rial then chopped him up like a butcher! I’m the one who’s turned. What if Tobias is wrong? What if I am capable of killing him in a fit of anger? And if I could possibly kill him is anyone safe around me? Perhaps I should leave here… alone… go somewhere where I can’t harm anyone.
These thoughts cycled through her brain as she sat huddled in the bed, her knees hugged tightly to her chest. It took a medical droid giving her a sedative before she could fall asleep. Even then, she was plagued by dreams of waking up with the mangled bodies of her crewmates all around her, her hands and blade dripping with their blood. Tobias would appear in front of her, a look of sadness in his eyes before she thrust her blade into his heart.
It was very early in the morning when she woke up with a moan. Dreading having more of the same dream, Koria rose from the bed and put on a robe before heading out for a walk. On her way out the door, she tripped over something, just managing to keep to her feet. Looking down, she was surprised to see Tobias sitting propped against the doorframe, one leg out. “Tobias?”
The Jedi Master's head bobbed as he came awake almost instantly in the same, unnerving way every Jedi did that Koria had ever met. His blue eyes focused on hers, and as he blinked, she asked, "What are you doing out here?"
Tobias got awkwardly to his feet, his left arm of no use whatsoever with the new bandage. Once he was facing Koria, he shrugged, although that particular shoulder barely moved. "I was having trouble sleeping. It was strange because I was so tired. Anyway, after lying in my cabin for a while, I decided to walk around the ship." He hesitated, his eyes shifting from hers downward. "I just found it - comfortable, I guess, out here." He ran a hand through his hair, making the short, blond tufts stick up. "I figured I might as well get some sleep if I could - anyone who came across me could always just chalk it up to strange Jedi habits."
Koria felt her arm twitch, and she tried to hide it by holding it behind her back. "I couldn't sleep either," she smiled shakily as she looked up at Tobias, not quite meeting his eyes.
"Would you like to go down to the mess hall and get some tea?" He glanced at her arm before shifting his gaze back to her eyes. "At least, it helps to soothe my nerves when I feel over-extended."
The invitation gave Koria some comfort, reminding her of the mornings back at the Temple when she and Tobias shared tea over breakfast and spoke quietly. "I'd like that."
The walk was mostly in silence as they made their way down to the cafeteria, each absorbed in his and her own thoughts. Tobias could sense a restlessness - some kind of profound uneasiness - from his former student, but he was reluctant to breech the subject. He suspected it had to do with the events of yesterday - how could it not? - but somehow it seemed as though, if they could just pretend things were normal… whatever that meant… long enough, they would actually become normal.
The silence stretched on as they sat down with their tea, Koria looking forlorn as she gazed into her cup. She looked up when Tobias reached out and took her hand, her eyes finally meeting his. A tear slipped down her cheek as she whispered, "I have to leave."
Tobias held his mug between his hands, feeling a jolt go through him at her words. His face still impassive, the Jedi Master took a moment to calm himself, focusing on the warmth suffusing through the ceramic. "Why is that?" he finally asked, his voice level and, when he looked up at her from his contemplation of his tea, his gaze steady.
Koria found herself shivering in spite of the warmth of the mug in her hands, and she looked down once more. "Because I don't have the confidence in me that you do. I'm afraid I..." she stopped as she felt like a boulder lodged in her throat. Swallowing painfully, she continued quietly, her voice barely above a whisper, "I don't want to hurt anyone."
He raised an eyebrow, giving her a kind smile. "I think your leaving might accomplish that very effectively, though," Tobias replied softly, willing her to look at him in hopes he could tease out what was really bothering her.
"You don't get it do you?" She exclaimed as she stood up, spilling her tea as she bumped the table. She looked around and was grateful that no one else was in the mess hall at this hour besides some serving droids. Ignoring the mess she made, she looked at Tobias as she tearfully explained, "I'm scared of killing someone in a fit of rage... I... I have to go!" She turned on her heals and ran out of the cafeteria.
With a sigh, Tobias stood. He pulled a pile of napkins out of the dispenser across the cafeteria and mopped up the puddle of tea on the table that was dripping onto the floor. He returned the two mugs to the window for the droids to clean. Once the Jedi Master had finished, he surveyed the exit through which Koria had fled. If I were Koria, where would I go on this ship? he thought, although he already had an idea. There was a small, transparisteel-ceilinged observatory at the top of the ship - somewhere that gave a near 360 degree view of the stars beyond. He'd found it last night, while roaming around, and had thought it peaceful and beautiful, if not what he'd needed at the time.
Tobias did indeed know Koria well. She took all the shortcuts she knew to get to what most called ‘make out point’ on the ship. As she approached the door however, she hesitated, hoping there would be no one putting it to use for that purpose. Taking a deep breath, she went in and was glad to see no one there. Sighing, she went to the center of the room and looked out. The sheer vastness of the view made her feel small and insignificant, which was oddly comforting. Or not... for if I am insignificant, so are my worries. With that thought, she began a kata, slowly opening herself to the Force as she moved.
She was probably halfway through the exercise when the door hissed open, revealing the Jedi Master. He came into the room silently, painfully aware of Koria throwing herself into the Force almost to the point where the lines between herself and not-herself were blurred. It was a very intimate moment, and Tobias considered going elsewhere until she was finished, so as not to intrude upon her kata or her catharsis.
Immersed in the Force, Koria could sense Tobias, and his reluctance to interfere. Without stopping or missing a beat in the kata, she spoke quietly, "Please stay."
Tobias nodded in response, knowing she would sense it, and settled onto one of the soft chairs lining the window to watch as Koria finished, letting her movements lull him into his own meditation.
Perhaps it was the Force that lead her there, but the kata ended right next to where the Jedi Master was seated. After standing in the finishing stance, Koria relaxed and sat next to him, saying nothing.
Tobias steepled his fingers awkwardly, inspecting the lines and veins that criss-crossed the back of his hands and the round, flat nails that capped each of his fingers. "Koria," he said quietly, still focused on his fingers, "I don't understand what you're trying to tell me. Why you feel you need to go."
Taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly, Koria leaned her head against the wall, looking up at the stars above them as she spoke softly. "There is so much darkness inside me... much like the darkness between those stars." She closed her eyes as she continued. "I couldn't sleep because I dreamed that I killed everyone on this ship... then you."
She pulled her head away from the wall as she opened her eyes and turned towards Tobias. "I don't share the faith you have in me. I have to go away before I let my anger drive me to kill everyone I love."
Tobias inhaled slowly, absorbing what she had said. Above them, the stars rotated very slowly as the ship moved through its orbit around the planet. He sorted out his thoughts before replying, "Koria, everything's a choice. You [ i]chose[/i] not to kill me, just as you chose to kill Rial - and rightfully so." He folded up his hands, thinking of the meditation gardens in the Temple of Coruscant. How many times had he debated these issues with other Jedi? How many times had the subject of choice - and what to do with it - come up? "Everyone faces darkness. Everyone has a moment where they decide right or wrong - what he or she ought to do. But those moments - taken individually - aren't what define you. A good being isn't made evil by one decision, any more than an evil being is redeemed by one good act. We are shaped by the pattern of our behavior - an arrangement echoed by how the Force is made up by the consciousness of billions of beings."
He reached over to Koria, putting his arm around her shoulder and pulling her towards him. She rested her head against his shoulder, looking down at his left hand, resting in his lap. Through his chest, her temple against his collarbone, his soft baritone reverberated. "Giving into darkness - or living a life within the light - it's a choice you make over and over again. Koria, I have faith in you not because I simply believe that you'll make the right decisions, but because I've seen you do it again and again. You are one of the strongest people I know - you put the well-being of others ahead of your own safety and comfort. When you do make a mistake, you admit it and try to correct it before moving on."
Koria closed her eyes, feeling the tears prick at the corners, not wanting to cry over this again. She felt his hand tighten on her shoulder before relaxing, the hum of his breath vibrating her cheek as he spoke again. "If you really think you need to go away, I won't stand in your way. I just hope you'll reconsider - think of everything you have to offer to this community, to your friends. They love you and respect you here, as Ieron and Kemin and I do. Don't - don't let that be taken away from you over a moment's impulse."
Putting her arms around Tobias' waist, Koria sighed. The irony wasn't lost on her that just before she had fallen asleep, she had given pretty much the same talk to Kemin... though she wasn't quite as long winded about it. She found herself smiling as warmth and fondness welled up within her breast. Just when she was about to once more profess her love for Tobias, the door to the observation deck opened and she heard someone gasp in surprise.
"You!"
Surprised to hear her father's voice, she sat up as she pulled away from Tobias to see her dad standing in the doorway, face flushed red in anger, and her mother standing behind him with a mixture of surprise, suspicion and... was that amusement Koria saw? She could not be sure, for at that moment, Kal rushed over and grabbed Tobias' tunic and pulled him up. "You need to stay away from my daughter!"
Tobias looked down at Kal's angry expression, his own blue eyes narrowed. "Will you please let go of me? I think your daughter is old enough to choose her own company at this point - and if she would like me to stay away from her, all she needs to do is tell me." When Kal tightened his grip, yanking Tobias's face closer to his, the Jedi Master moved his left shoulder. "Besides, what do you think I'm going to do? Koria has proved multiple times she is more than capable of defending herself."
The calm voice of the Jedi Master served only to infuriate the Corellian freighter captain further. Kal let go with his left hand, balling it into a fist as he pulled back to deliver a blow towards Tobias' face. He was surprised as a hand stopped the punch and he looked down into his daughter's matching jade eyes.
"Stop it, father!" Koria had somehow squeezed in between him and the Jedi Master, and now glared angrily up at him.
Feeling a gentle hand upon his shoulder, he backed away, gazing at his wife and surprised at her tone as she spoke, "Come, my husband." Her purring voice struck a pleasant cord throughout him as she continued, "Koria has made her decision. It is her right. Let's give her room."
Kal's right hand loosened slightly on Tobias' collar as warring emotions coursed through him. They had come in here for a romantic interlude, and though his protectiveness of his daughter had suddenly interrupted the mood, it had not totally dispelled it. He pulled his gaze from his wife to glare at the Jedi over his daughter's head. As he let go of the tunic, Kal narrowed his eyes. "If you hurt her any more, I'll kill you... Jedi or no."
Tobias stood motionless, his face still very close to Kal's as he hadn't stepped back when he'd been released. He blinked slowly, his expression the stereotypical Jedi calm, unreadable. "I hope to only meet you as a friend - which I believe we have before - but should it come to that, it may be harder than you think." He refocused over his shoulder, giving a curt nod to the Twi'lek. "Mrs. Rimstar," he said, and with that, he neatly side-stepped around the angry father, disappearing out the door.
Kal took a step towards the door and was held back by both Koria and Shoyma. “Please, dad…”
The Corellian looked down into his daughter’s pleading eyes and relaxed. Reaching up with his hands, he cradled her face, stroking her cheeks with his thumbs. “Okay honey, but remember, you always have family who loves you.”
Koria shot her dad a crooked grin. “And you’ll never let me forget it.” She hugged him briefly and reached out to squeeze her mom’s hand. “Well, I’ll leave so you two can do what you came here for.” She giggled as she turned, walking towards the door. “Though I’m too old to have a baby brother or sister,” was her parting shot as the door closed behind her.
Tobias was just outside the door, leaning his head back against the wall. His eyes were closed, brows angled together and arms as close to crossed as they could come. Koria reached out, placing her hand on his arm, but the Jedi Master jerked away.
“Tobias…” she said quietly then bit her bottom lip as her stomach tightened. “I… my dad doesn’t hate you… he’s just really protective of me.”
"No," he replied, "he just wants me dead should I hurt you. Which this probably qualifies." His expression hardened. "It's difficult to hear one's own thoughts echoed by someone else."
Koria rolled her eyes. "He doesn't want you dead, Tobias, he's bluffing! Dad is like a Corellian skatlizard who hisses, draws up his head frill, and puts out its claws when anything approaches the nest. He doesn't attack unless there is definite physical danger."
She felt her left hand spasming, and held it behind her. Damn it, not now! "Tobias, we've hurt each other in the past... but... you have always been my light... especially now." She swallowed as she reached out once more with her right hand. "Please..." she found she couldn't speak any more because of the overwhelming emotion flooding her. Don't leave me in the dark!
"So what was the physical danger that prompted him to try and punch me?" Making a noise of frustration, Tobias turned and slammed his fist into the wall, bending the thin durasteel lining the hallway. Koria backed up slightly; in her mind, Tobias was always quiet and gentle. It frightened her some to see him like this - to be reminded that he, like Ieron and Kemin, had been trained to defend, but also to wound and kill, when necessary. What frightened her more was this show of violence wasn’t necessary… and showed just how exhausted Tobias was. The indentation popped back out when he removed his hand.
"It's one thing to be threatened by the Empire," he said before breaking off, opening and closing his hand, feeling the pain all the way down to his elbow. He sighed, his indignation suddenly spent. He placed his fist back against the wall, leaning his head against it, eyes closed. "I just want what's best for you, Koria," he said, his voice quiet. He turned his head, pushing away from the wall and opening his hand as his gaze fell on her. "You can't tell me this is it."
Koria winced as the spasm in her hand went up her arm all the way to her shoulder. She quickly grabbed her arm with her right hand, hugging it close to her body. A tear ran down her cheek as their eyes met. "All I know is when we first met, you said the Force led me to ask you to be my mentor... and ever since then, it's been pulling us back to each other. And each time we parted, the pain it caused was worse than before." She shook her head as she whispered, "I can't bear to not have you in my life."
He looked at her in surprise. "Koria, I'm not talking about going anywhere. Besides, I have nowhere to go. It just seems..." He trailed off, looking away and shaking his head. Tobias then swallowed. "I get tired of hurting you."
"Hold me, please," her shaky voice sounded high like a child's as she reached out with her right hand. The spasming in her left arm, though ignored by her for the time being, became more prominent.
Tobias pulled her to him, crushing her against his chest as he held her tightly with his right arm. He leaned his cheek against her hair, staring at the wall where he'd just slammed his hand blindly, not seeing it at all. He could feel her trembling, the shakes in her arm reverberating through her body. He just held her tighter, as if that could fix everything.
"Please, don't let my dad come between us... he'll come around... he really does respect you."
He just shook his head, feeling her hair against his cheek, knowing that Kal, alone, was not the problem to which he was referring.
Well aware that the situation was more complicated than her parents’ disapproval and the confrontation between her father and Tobias, Koria was too tired to focus on the true problem properly. All she knew for sure was that in spite of her self-doubt and the reservation she sensed from Tobias, she loved him with all her heart. Feeling warm and safe in his arms, she let her adoration and exhaustion flow along the Force as she murmured, “I love you.”
She gazed into his eyes, willing him to know… to feel… that those were not only words… to know just how much he meant to her and that she’d always love him no matter what.
Tobias sensed Koria’s strong devotion to him, and from deep within, he felt a love just as strong rise up. Then Tobias’ training and his self-doubt about his suitability for her reasserted themselves. Even as he pulled away and raised his shields, he felt the hurt his withdrawal caused Koria. However, since she had retreated behind her barriers as well, he didn’t see that she thought it was a fault or weakness within her that caused him to retreat. His own heart ached because he knew he was hurting her once more, and hated himself for it. I’m doing the right thing though. “I’m sorry, Kor.”
Looking down as she backed away from him, she shrugged. “We should get some sleep.” She turned from him as she continued in a flat tone, “Good night, Tobias.” Tears nearly blinded her as she went to the elevator and pushed the button to go back to the medbay.
To be continued...
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earlybird-obi-wan
Registered:
Aug '06
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Date Posted:
9/5 5:46am
Subject:
RE: Tender Shadows (USJS OCs; ROTS/IT; drama, action, romance) - Updated 9.04.08
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Those two, turning rounds around each other, they should open up and be together. You can see that they both are in love.
Lovely update with those protective parents
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FANART [link=http://boards.theforce.net/fan_art/b10020/25793899]fanart[/link]
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Trika_Kenobi
Registered:
Nov '99
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Date Posted:
9/5 6:00am
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RE: Tender Shadows (USJS OCs; ROTS/IT; drama, action, romance) - Updated 9.04.08
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They had come in here for a romantic interlude, and though his protectiveness of his daughter had suddenly interrupted the mood, it had not totally dispelled it.
Oh lawd. Avert yer eyes, children! 
lol. Thanks for the update! Superb, as usual!
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Talon Intelligence Squadron: Assaulting Good Sense and Order Since Y2K http://www.TalonIntelligenceSquadron.com proud oldbie master to GIRLSOLO
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angry_bendu1
Registered:
Apr '07
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Date Posted:
9/5 9:37am
Subject:
RE: Tender Shadows (USJS OCs; ROTS/IT; drama, action, romance) - Updated 9.04.08
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His own heart ached because he knew he was hurting her once more, and hated himself for it. I’m doing the right thing though.
Uh, nuh-uh!  I'd have to disagree with you on that boy.
She's a grown woman, she gets to make her own life-threatening and potentially suicidal decisions.
Great post!
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Ramblings of a Jedi (snarky Jesika's diary- filled w/ romance, sarcasm, etc.): http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/28753761/p1/?0 I was staring at the orange juice because it said "concentrate". Proud owner of a '96 Geo Metro. "To the Crapmobile!"
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Musical-Wingstar
Registered:
Mar '08
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Date Posted:
9/10 5:04pm
Subject:
RE: Tender Shadows (USJS OCs; ROTS/IT; drama, action, romance) - Updated 9.04.08
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earlybird-obi-wan - Round and round and round they go... We'll have to give them a bit of a break.
Trika - Makes you wonder if leggings fit loosely or tightly...
angry_bendu1 - The lies we tell ourselves are the hardest ones to figure out they're wrong, eh? But at least Koria's good at making those suicidal and life-threatening decisions.
Chapter 33: Recovery
Later that morning, Koria woke up as a med droid came in to check her vitals. “How are you feeling today, Miss Rimstar?”
“It’s Mrs. Rimstar-Cor.” She replied testily.
“My apologies, ma’am, how are you feeling?”
“Tired, cranky and ready to tear the limbs off a ten-armed rancor.”
“I don’t think such a thing exists.” The droid continued, making its checks as it spoke. “However, I do believe I get your meaning. Perhaps some breakfast will put you in better spirits.”
“I doubt it.”
“Well, perhaps not, but protocol does require us to feed our patients. What is your preference this morning?”
“Anything healthy as long as it isn’t eggs or meat.”
“Noted,” the droid bowed before excusing itself and leaving.
Less than an hour later, Koria finished her breakfast. Restless, she got up and paced. She scowled as her fingers started twitching on her left hand. “Just a few more days at most,” she muttered. Then what? Tobias said he wasn’t talking about going anywhere… but, he also said he had nowhere to go… would it be different if he had someplace to go? If I win that game of pool, what will be the point if he doesn’t want me with him? What right do I have to force myself on him?
The entrance by Dr. Kern interrupted Koria’s thoughts as the older woman cheerfully greeted her patient, “Good morning.”
“If you say so.”
“Emdee was right, you are in a mood.” Seeing the younger woman shrug, Della asked, “Does it have anything to do with your little walk with the good Jedi early this morning?”
“That’s private,” Koria stubbornly folded her arms.
“Koria, you have to talk to someone. Keeping this pain, fear, and anger pent up won’t help you.”
“I don’t need a psychological doctor, I just need to get out of here… unless there’s a physical reason I have to stay cooped up in medbay.”
Shaking her head, the doctor spoke in a neutral tone, “No, the spasms and twitching should only be irritating, not life-threatening…”
“Good, then you’ll release me?”
“Yes, but I’m afraid I must recommend to the General that you be put on the inactive duty list.”
“What! Why?” Koria whirled around to face Dr. Kern, anger and frustration flashing in her eyes.
“Because you won’t cooperate with the psychiatric examination.”
“Why do I need it? Do you think I’ve gone off the deep end now?” Koria’s stomach knotted, as she feared just that.
Della sighed and shook her head once more. “Koria, I don’t think you’ve gone crazy, but I am concerned for you. Besides that, every time a soldier goes through something traumatic, it’s my duty to evaluate his or her mental and emotional state. You’ve just been raped, for the second time…”
“Doctor, I know this may sound flippant, but I don’t mean it that way… but, so what? I grew up knowing there were beings who enjoyed preying on others. This isn’t going to make me cower in fear that a rapist is stalking me at every turn.”
“You also witnessed two friends seriously harmed while you lay helpless to aid them.” When her patient remained quiet at that, she added softly, “Jecca’s doing well, by the way. She should be released from the medbay tomorrow morning at the earliest.”
Koria’s face brightened at the news, and she unfolded her arms as she asked, “Is she up for visits? May I see her, please?”
The corners of Dr. Kern’s mouth turned up slightly. When she had first met Koria when the young woman had joined in the ranks of Iblis’s secret rebel force, the doctor had thought she had bipolar disorder. Now though, she realized Koria was just extremely expressive of her emotions, and it wasn’t actually a mood swing, rather than a distraction from her overall mood. “Yes, you can see her. I’ll even start the process of discharging you so you can just go to your quarters afterwards… but…” she rose her finger to show she was serious, “… I expect you to check in with me later for a complete psychological exam.”
“Thank you, doctor,” Koria hugged her as she promised, “I’ll be there right after lunch.” She then left the room.
Dr. Kern stood in place after Koria left, and when the young woman peeked back in a moment later, she said, “Room C-4.”
“Thanks!” And Koria was gone.
Della chuckled as she shook her head before leaving the room.
As she approached room four in corridor “C”, Koria heard guitar music and suppressed a giggle when she recognized “Saber Swinging Jedi” coming through the open door. Peeking into the room, she asked, “Trying to start another fountain room riot, are you?”
Laughing, Jecca looked up. “Koria, come in!” She carefully placed her guitar into the case as her friend approached. “I was so worried for you,” she murmured as the two women hugged.
Koria closed her eyes as she fought back tears. “I was so afraid he killed you.”
“Nah,” the young singer said as they pulled away from each other and Koria sat in a chair next to the bed. “I’m too hard-headed to be done in by duracrete.” She comically crossed her eyes, “Though I’ve been feeling a bit lala lately.” As her friend giggled, Jecca reached out and took her hand. “I’m so sorry for what I said… you know before that… guy… took you. I should have known you’d never betray Master McCal, or truly support this new Empire Palpatine has created.”
Koria squeezed Jecca’s hand. “It’s okay, really.” Tears started running down her cheeks, and she pulled her hand away as she wiped them with both hands. “Gods, Jecca, I’m just glad you’re alive! I thought he killed both you and Jimi, and I was so afraid he was going to kill anyone who tried to rescue me, and I couldn’t stand the thought of anyone being hurt because of me.”
Slowly, Jecca sat up and reached out to place a hand on Koria’s shoulder. “Hey, this wasn’t your fault! Just like back in the Temple, when Stave got hurt it wasn’t your fault. Stop making the choices other people make as your responsibility!” She grinned slightly, as she added, “That’s very egotistical, you know.”
Letting out a shaky laugh, Koria nodded. “Yeah, well you’re still not a very good fighter. You should have seen yourself on Rial’s back.” She mimicked the other woman’s flailing arms, and Jecca started laughing.
“Well not everyone is a natural fighter like you.”
“Thank the Force.” Koria reached out and squeezed her friend’s hand. “I missed you.”
“I missed you, too. Hey, I heard you and Master McCal were going to play a game of pool, and people have been wagering on the outcome.”
Koria blushed and looked away with a sigh.
“What is it, Kor?”
“Nothing.”
“Kor, it’s me, Jecca! Don’t shut me out.” Trying to tease her into talking to her, she nudged Koria’s shoulder and pointed to her head. “Besides, you owe me for this.”
Koria looked up and grinned slightly. “And here you just said it wasn’t my fault. Make up your mind, will you?”
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Even though Kemin woke early, he felt very much refreshed. Those five hours were the best sleep he’d had in months if not years. Standing up, he stretched then headed for the refresher before getting dressed. On the way to the mess hall, he stopped by Ieron’s door. He hesitated slightly, though he wasn’t quite sure why he should feel nervous about asking a friend to break his fast with him. He almost turned away, but somehow he felt like he was being a coward, so he tapped on the call button beside the door and waited.
Uncomfortable seconds ran by before he tapped on it again, this time letting his finger linger on the button a little longer than usual. Force, why am I so nervous? This is Ieron. I’ve known her for… what… how long? Kemin smiled slightly as he thought of the hours he’d spent training her in the art of investigation. She was a quick learner… a natural, really… and she’d always been able to make him laugh. He jumped slightly when the door opened to reveal Ieron, and he smiled, cursing himself for looking as nervous as he felt. “Hey, up for some caf and a little something to eat?”
"I'm always up for caf and grub," Ieron replied. She laughed as she palmed shut the door, a not entirely happy sound. "It's nice to have someone to eat with for once."
"Or at least it's nice to have someone you'd like to eat with for once." Kemin spoke quietly as he looked at her speculatively. "You feel okay?"
"I'd like to think I get on well with everyone I've come across on this ship," she said. "I guess I'm just getting itchy - feeling useless." Ieron shrugged as they started down the hall. "I mean, I know we just got back from that Rial's lair and everything, but..." Trailing off, Ieron realized she was hesitant to complain about the current situation. Granted, General Iblis had taken Tobias and her in without a complaint, sheltering them when they needed it most. But she wasn't a solider, so she wasn't one of the rebels, and she wasn't a pilot. Koria and Tobias were so involved with their own issues that interacting with either of them wasn't as comfortable as it should have been. Kemin was all but a stranger from his time on Nar Shaddaa. Her hand twitched, a gesture filling in for her lack of words, and Ieron wished she still had that ball, something to occupy her hands.
Kemin didn't think about it. He reached out and took Ieron's hand. He swallowed nervously once he had done so, wondering how she would react. Looking in her eyes, he tried to smile. "I'm not only useless, but in the way. I don't even know who I am any more." He looked away from Ieron as he slowly, reluctantly, released her hand. "I..." he shrugged, not quite knowing how to say how he felt. "I'm sorry, I'm probably not going to be very enjoyable company... but you're the only one I feel comfortable with, and I need to re-connect... you know?" He looked back at her hopefully.
"Yeah - I know," she replied softly. "I don't think you'll be any worse company than me." She had watched his eyes through his small speech, swallowing when he did, knowing what he was trying to tell her because she had felt that way too. Reaching out, she grabbed his hand and gave it a squeeze. "You're not the only one - unsure about who you are - what you were made to be. I think - I've wondered a thousand times if it's about..." Ieron was suddenly shy, letting go of his hand. Despite Kemin suddenly opening up to her, it was too much to give up all her self-doubt, the ease with which she could hide behind her Investigator and Jedi training.
Kemin chuckled, though there wasn't much humor behind it. "Yeah, it's hard to come out behind our masks." Seeing a strand of hair fall into Ieron's eyes, he reached up to brush it away, but hesitated. It was a gesture that somehow seemed too familiar... too forward... too... intimate. His hand hung there for a moment before he pulled away with a sigh.
As one the two Jedi continued their walk toward the mess hall in silence. It wasn't until they both settled down with their cups of caf and breakfast plates between them that Kemin spoke, "I have a confession to make." He took a sip of the caf as if to gain courage through the mug, "I always found you attractive." His face flushed a bright red after saying it, and he looked down at his food as he ate, not feeling brave enough to meet the eyes of his companion.
Ieron scrunched up her face and hunched down, hiding behind her mug. "'A Jedi craves not these things,'" she said in a gravelly voice. The chuckle that came from her this time was amused and gentle - genuine. "You know, I thought you were handsome when we were first introduced - although I was terrified of you. Poi was intimidating enough, but at least I knew him." She shook her head, smiling with the memories. "How many times did you two knock me on my ass just to pick me back up again?"
Kemin relaxed at Ieron's imitation of Master Yoda, chortling as he shook his head. "Handsome? Me?" He asked, truly astonished, then continued, "and I terrified you? Little ol' me?" He grinned as an amused glint lit his hazel eyes. "Wow, I never would have believed it." He didn't bother pointing out that the 'knocking down' had been necessary to get rid of bad habits and to build up the right skills to be a better Investigator - and Jedi.
Ieron snorted derisively. "Oh, please. Between you and Poi, the Investigator program had never seen such talented Jedi - or ones more puckish. I'd spent most of my life up to that point feeling inept. To be assigned to Poi? Who was of course paired up with you? Terrified doesn't begin to describe that emotion - which of course I wasn't suppose to have anyway."
The slightly older Investigator's eyes turned serious as he looked at Ieron intensely, and she was surprised to see them subtly turn a darker shade of blue. Have they always done that? she idly wondered as he spoke in a steely tone, "Contrary to what others may say, fear is an asset if you can keep it from going to far. It is your warning that things aren't right and if you don't listen to it you can wind up dead... or worse, get someone else killed." His voice softened then, and his eyes went back to their normal hazel shade as one corner of his mouth lifted. "I think perhaps that puckish Jedi you once knew is lost."
Ieron leaned back during his speech, feeling annoyance rise at his lecture. Once a student... she thought peevishly, her eyes dropping to her caf. She tuned back in as he said the last sentence, and Ieron felt her breath leave in a long exhale that blew steam from the caf into her face. "I know the student he taught is long gone," she replied quietly. "How did we get that way?"
Even as she asked, the Jedi Knight knew the answer. She had only been assigned to two missions as a full Investigator on her own, but they had been enough. Starting with Rossan's death on Coruscant, her tenure always came to mind as a long list of names - Jedi she had been helpless - No, Ieron corrected herself, ordered to stand by and do nothing that would reveal her position by the Council itself - to save. It was being forced to make decisions that cost other beings their lives that had made her this way - made her forget who she had been when she had been allowed to believe in the good she was doing.
"Ieron..." Kemin ran his fingers over his unruly wavy hair and sighed. "Force, I didn't mean to go into lecture mode... I was just trying to say your fear didn't make you a bad Jedi. Besides that, you mean more to me than a former student." He colored slightly at the admission even as he thought back to the first mission she'd been sent on... the one he had recommended her for... then he'd been sent on a different mission and couldn't be there for her when it went horribly wrong. He forced himself to look in her eyes as he spoke, "I guess being undercover for an extended time... and having to do things we aren't proud of... changes us. Jedi who don't have to do those things can't understand."
Ieron snorted, which caused her to choke on her caf. She coughed for a moment, going red in the face, before saying, "That's the truth. Must be nice to live in an ivory tower - especially when you can see all of Coruscant from the topmost room," she said bitterly. "They must have elected my master their mascot when he was a member," she added in an exaggerated whisper, one corner of her mouth quirking up.
Kemin was taking a sip of his own caf when she'd said the last part, and when he started laughing, it was his turn to choke. His eyes got huge and he quickly grabbed a napkin and put it up to his face as he turned away, still choking. Then he began making rather alarming wheezing sounds and disappeared as he fell out of Ieron's sight onto the floor.
"Force, Kemin, it wasn't that funny," Ieron said. She slid off her own chair to peer under the table to make sure he was all right.
She saw him grasping his neck, face redder than a zoochberry as he struggled for breath.
"Keep coughing, Kemin!" Ieron sat on the floor next to him, afraid that she would be forced to find a way to get the caf back out of his throat if he stopped breathing. She looked around the cafeteria, but it was deserted.
His struggling became weaker, and eerily, there were no more sounds coming from his mouth. Suddenly, Kemin went limp. Ieron couldn't see any sign of him breathing.
Ieron swore as she crawled over to him. She rolled him onto his back, his head to the side so that whatever came up would stay up and not go back down his throat. Fitting the back of her hand into the palm of her other one, the Jedi Knight placed the heel of her hand right beneath his sternum as she straddled his legs. Using her shoulders, she pushed, driving the heel of her hand under his sternum and up towards his head, forcing the air out of his lungs, hoping to propel what liquids were left in his throat out.
As the air was expelled from his lungs, Kemin started laughing hysterically, "You trying to kill me or save me, hon?"
Ieron froze for just a moment, confused, before the realization of what happened washed over her. She grunted, glaring down at him, and with her hands still together, dealt him a savage blow right in the middle of his sternum. Without moving her hands, she leaned against him and pushed herself to her feet. Ieron nudged him with her boot before swearing, "Next time you really are dying, I'm going to let you!"
"Ouch!" Kemin held his stomach as he rose to his feet. With his other hand, he reached out to take her elbow. "Hey, I'm sorry. I guess that was pretty stupid." He winced as one of his fingers touched a tender spot on his sternum.
Ieron looked down at his hand holding her arm before looking back at him. "Must have seemed funnier from where you were sitting."
Seeing how she looked down where he touched her, Kemin removed his hand. Slumping his shoulders, he looked down at the floor. "I'm sorry. That was a very juvenile prank... and on hindsight, mean." He swallowed when he looked up at Ieron. "It wasn't my intention to do any harm... I just wanted to lighten the mood, and I made it worse."
Ieron touched him on the shoulder. "Forget it. No harm done, right?"
"I guess not." He looked up into her eyes as he added quietly, "Unless you meant it about letting me die."
Her head tipped, Ieron returned his gaze. She gripped his shoulder, fingers digging into the muscle hard enough to bruise it. Unblinking, her voice soft but fierce, she answered with one word: "Never."
Kemin's fingers trembled as he reached up and stroked her cheek. At the same time, he closed his eyes as he leaned toward her and tentatively placed his lips against hers.
Ieron's eyes widened at first in surprised before she relaxed against him, eyes closing. Instantly, her mind sprang into action, analyzing and calculating, the risk/benefit sense that had been honed throughout her training doing what it always had. She ignored it though, not knowing what she wanted - what she ought to do - and just enjoying the moment and the connection.
Kemin's heart sped up at Ieron's response. Never had he dared dream she might return his feelings. He swallowed as he pressed harder against her mouth and placed his other hand on her waist. He slowly ran his fingers from her cheek gently down her neck, enjoying the feel of her silky skin.
She covered his hand with hers, the other one drifting to his waist. Then reason kicked back in. Ieron was enjoying the kiss, but suddenly fear whispered in, wondering what Kemin was thinking - what he was hoping to accomplish with this. How can two such damaged people do anything but hurt each other? the question came to her mind. Most of all, though, she didn't want to lead Kemin on, somehow promise more than she could give. Ieron broke off the kiss, breathless, biting her lip in uncertainty even as she wondered if that was the right thing to do, both for her and for him.
Breathing heavily, Kemin took her hands in his as he muttered, "Kriffin' hell. I just made things more complicated, didn't I?" The corners of his mouth trembled as he smiled and once more reached up to cup her cheek in one hand. "Ieron... I care for you. I know this is a bad time... I know... I heard that you've been talking about going under cover once more into the heart of the Empire to get information for the rebels... I won't hold you back from what you feel you need to do..." He took a deep breath and blew it out before leaning his forehead against hers. "I just wanted you to know... someone loves you, and hopes you come back."
"You always excelled at making things more complicated," Ieron said. She took Kemin's hand in hers, gently cupping it between her two palms. "Don't - please don't tell my master about that," she said quietly, studying the dark hairs on his wrist and hand. "I just need to know - to show myself that all those years of training weren't a waste, you know?" To redeem myself. She swallowed, still feeling the heat of Kemin's cheek next to hers, the pressure of his forehead pressed against hers. "But I'm glad to know there's something to come back to - something actually worth something."
Pulling her hand up to his lips, Kemin kissed her knuckles. "You have nothing to redeem yourself for, hon."
She shrugged, not shying away when he looked up at her, his eyes fixing on hers. "I'll believe it when you do."
Deliberately misinterpreting what she meant, he said in a pseudo-innocent voice, "But I do believe you have nothing to redeem yourself for!" He squeezed her hand to let her know that though the innocence was faked, the sentiment behind what he said was true.
Ieron ruffled his hair, getting it to stick up. "Ah, to be young and stupid again," she said with a grin.
Part of Kemin wanted to tickle her... to relax and have fun... but he had to be sure he got his point across. Pulling his head back slightly, he reached up and grabbed her hand. Holding both of her hands in his. His eyes once more became an intense blue as he spoke. "Ieron, I'm serious. You have nothing to prove. You are the best Jedi I know... including his piousness, Master McCal." When she tried to pull away, he tightened his grip. "Look at me, Ieron. Don't go if your reason for doing so is to run away from facing what you feel is a weakness within you!"
"I thought you said you wouldn't try to stop me." Her eyes flashed with anger and annoyance.
"I won't if you're going for the right reason!"
"The right reason!" Ieron made a disgusted noise. "And what is the right reason, Kemin? To destroy the thing that Anakin became? To find a way to dethrone the Emperor? To restore the Jedi to their former glory? Which one of those reasons isn't full of the same pitfalls of pride or anger or some other dark emotion?" The Jedi Knight yanked her hands out of her friend’s and moved closer to him, her eyes darting from one of his to the other. "And it's not a weakness I'm trying to run away from - you can't run away from something you're heading straight towards."
She shook her head and turned, stalking across the cafeteria. Halfway between Kemin and the door she turned, looking back at the other Jedi. "I guess I would have thought you'd understand," she said, her anger burnt out. "You, of all people, Kemin." Ieron sighed before moving again, disappearing out the door.
"Ieron, wait!" He hurried after her, cursing himself in frustration. He caught up with her in the corridor, rushing to keep pace with her. "This is how I see what's going on. You feel like you have something to prove to yourself and perhaps to others... you feel like going off, risking your life, you can somehow redeem yourself... correct me if I'm wrong."
Shaking her head in frustration, she tried to form a response as she leaned against the wall. "It's not just that. It's about having something that's my own - you know? It's like all these other missions, it wasn't mine to succeed or fail. I had to pull out for the first one or be killed and..." Ieron trailed off with a shrug. "The second, it was either the war would be won or it wouldn't."
She looked down at her hands, studying them as though they had some kind of answer written in the lines on her palms. The Jedi Knight stretched out her fingers before clenching them into fists. "You listen to what other people tell you so long, you forget what's you and what's what they've told you. You chase something so long," she started, remember what she had told Koria a lifetime ago.
"Only to find it wasn't what you wanted after all?" Kemin guessed. "Sometimes people think, 'If only I had this, or I could do that...' and then when they have it, it doesn't deliver what they'd hoped." Kemin gave a bitter laugh then shrugged.
Taking Ieron's elbow, he stopped and turned her to him. His eyes turned a soft green as he spoke in a husky voice. "I understand you need to do this, hon. I also see it's something that's needed by the rebels, and you're the best person to do it. Just like..." He broke off as he thought about her first mission and how he had unknowingly recommended her for something that would almost kill her. "Just like you were the best person to infiltrate that gang."
Kemin let go of her elbow as he turned and looked away, folding his arms across his chest. His voice was barely above a whisper as he spoke, "I just wanted to let you know I'm sorry for the pain I caused you then... and that I love you before you went and didn't come back."
"About before, you didn't know what was going to happen. You did me a favor. No apologies for that," Ieron said. She reached out and nudged his elbow with her fingers. "Hey, and there's no use worrying about what might happen. I haven't left yet, right?"
"It's not what happened on that mission I feel bad about... those things happen..." he turned to look at her once more and took her hand. "I came this," he put up his hand with the tips of the forefinger and thumb barely touching as he spoke, "close to saying to hell with the mission they wanted me to go on so I could be there for you when I heard what happened, but I didn't. I had to play the good Jedi everyone thought I was - duty first, to hell with what those you hold dear are going through."
He squeezed her hand as he reached out to caress her cheek with his fingers. "You and I both know you're not likely to survive this mission. I accept that once you leave here, I may never see you alive again. What I cannot accept... what I don't want to let happen... is giving myself a chance to think, 'What if?'... to regret not telling and showing you how much you mean to me."
"Everyone plays that good Jedi sometimes, I think," Ieron said softly, her eyes on the floor, "even his piousness himself." She bit her lip, carefully shielding, torn between wanting to give Kemin something to hang on to, knowing how important that can be. But she also didn't want to give false promises or hope to him. She knew as well as he did that the luck she'd had on Utapau wasn't likely to save her again.
Leaning towards her slightly, Kemin kissed her forehead before whispering in her ear. "Please, Ieron, let us have this little time together."
She reached her arms around him, leaning her head against his shoulder. "You always were a persuasive git," she said quietly. "I always kind of liked that about you."
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earlybird-obi-wan
Registered:
Aug '06
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Date Posted:
9/10 9:46pm
Subject:
RE: Tender Shadows (USJS OCs; ROTS/IT; drama, action, romance) - Updated 9.10.08
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Love to see Ieron and Kemin together. They should make a nice couple.
Great update
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writer and Star Wars fan
FANART [link=http://boards.theforce.net/fan_art/b10020/25793899]fanart[/link]
stories in my bio
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Trika_Kenobi
Registered:
Nov '99
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Date Posted:
9/11 10:21am
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RE: Tender Shadows (USJS OCs; ROTS/IT; drama, action, romance) - Updated 9.10.08
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Wonderful job, you two! I particularly liked the extra Ieron stuff this time. My, my, my... things are getting complicated, eh?
Nice work! Thanks for the update!
Trikes
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Talon Intelligence Squadron: Assaulting Good Sense and Order Since Y2K http://www.TalonIntelligenceSquadron.com proud oldbie master to GIRLSOLO
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Musical-Wingstar
Registered:
Mar '08
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Date Posted:
9/15 6:00pm
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RE: Tender Shadows (USJS OCs; ROTS/IT; drama, action, romance) - Updated 9.10.08
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earlybird-obi-wan: They're a nice contrast to Tobias and Koria, that's for sure. It helps that they're a little more open to the new possibilities offered by this arrangement.
Trikes: You mean, it wasn't complicated before? I think we need to work on that. And it can't be all Koria and Tobias all the time, can it?
Chapter Thirty-Four: Sink or Scratch
Four days later, Koria sat in Dink and Kat’s quarters, rearranging their repertoire now that there were only four in the band. She found it hard to be enthusiastic as she sang duets with Kat. It wasn’t that the keyboardist didn’t have a good voice… he just wasn’t Jimi. The irrepressible Balosar singer’s voice and hers had a special indefinable quality that blended well, and no matter how much they bickered offstage, Koria and Jimi had a charismatic presence onstage.
It was during the song, Crash Course to Love, which Jimi had written to showcase his and Koria’s harmonic vocals, that Koria’s voice broke. “I’m sorry, I just can’t!” She rose from the chair and rushed to the refresher.
Mo, Dink and Kat sat looking from one to the other in uncomfortable silence. “I knew this was too soon,” Mo muttered. “We just kriffin’ had Jimi’s memorial service yesterday!”
“We don’t have much choice with the General wanting us to cover in two days.” Dink shrugged. “It doesn’t seem right without Jimi though.”
“I’m not a very good substitute for him,” Kat sighed morosely.
“It isn’t you, Kat,” Koria’s voice was quiet as she came out of the refresher. She placed a hand on his shoulder and squeezed slightly. “You have a wonderful voice… it’s just…” She stopped as she closed her eyes, trying not to cry. “Gods, I can’t believe he’s dead! And it’s my fault!”
She didn’t remember seeing Mo get up, but he was suddenly embracing her as she wept into his shirt. “How could it be your fault, Kitten, it was that bastard who shot him.” The Devronian musician shook his head.
“I didn’t warn him away… I tried, but I couldn’t speak… I was so scared!”
As Kat stood behind her, gently rubbing her back, Dink objected, “But you had that neuro-toxis crap in your veins, Kitten. Besides, even if you could have yelled out, it was probably too late.”
Mo pulled away from Koria a little as he placed a finger under her chin to make him look up at him. “He wouldn’t want you feeling guilty, you know.”
Wiping away her tears with one hand, she sniffled. “I treated him so mean. H-he prob’ly thought I hated him.”
“He didn’t think that, Kitten.” Dink, who was Jimi’s childhood friend, got up as he spoke. “He thought really highly of you. He knew you were stuck on…” he gave her a crooked smile as he paused “… that Jedi Dude.”
Koria laughed shakily.
Mo squeezed her shoulder as he looked at his wrist chrono. “Hey, speaking about him, isn’t that pool game supposed to start in a few minutes?”
“Oh… yeah…” Koria blushed.
“Well, let’s go then.” Dink grinned widely. “I’ve been looking forward to getting those hundred credits from you, Mo.”
As the four musicians left the room to head for the officer’s lounge, Koria sighed quietly to herself. I’m not even sure I want to play any more.
***
Tobias sat in his quarters, the light banks turned down low, providing just enough light to define the edges of the large pieces of furniture. He wasn't surprised when the door was pushed open, revealing the silhouette of his Padawan. In fact, the only thing he found at all unexpected about her appearance was how long she'd left it - he had thought she would have shown up for her pep talk at least a half an hour earlier.
The younger woman didn't say anything as she crossed the room, and Tobias felt the mattress sink with her weight as she came to sit beside him. The silence stretched on, but Tobias was unsure what to say, how to break it. He was thankful when Ieron did it for him, her alto voice seeming to warm the darkness.
"I've noticed you haven't been out of your quarters much," the former Padawan said. He watched as she leaned over, unsure of what she was doing in the gloom, until he felt the dip in the mattress as she tucked one foot under the opposite leg.
He lifted his right shoulder, knowing that Ieron would sense the gesture without being able to see it. "I'm surprised you didn't hear about the altercation I got into with the Rimstars," he replied quietly.
She shifted her weight, and Tobias could envision her glancing down as she formulated her response. "No, I heard," she said finally. "I just didn't think you would avoid coming out of your room over it."
"I didn't want to cause any more damage that I already had."
The words hung in the air, and Tobias felt vaguely disappointed. Ieron was supposed to cheer him up, to get him worked up for the pool game to help him win. Instead, she was sitting in silence, a brooding version of the woman who normally sat in her place.
"Did you place a bet on the outcome?" he asked finally.
"No - I couldn't bring myself to," she replied. Ieron reached over and squeezed his leg. "I know, normally I'm a betting person - but with everything that's happened, I just couldn't bring myself to do it. Besides, something tells me neither of you are going to being playing your best - and you know I only bet when I know the odds."
"Usually against them, but you do like to know." Tobias covered her hand with his, tightening his fingers around hers. He'd forgotten the comfort he got from her presence, the easy-going give and take that characterized their relationship. "Koria and I have a bet on this." The words seemed out of his mouth before he'd thought about it, unable to be recalled.
"Oh?"
"The stakes are the winner gets to ask anything of the loser he or she wants."
Ieron became very still next to him, and for a moment, he was unable to reach her through their bond. The moment passed, and he could sense her again, both the warmth from her body close to his and her presence, a distant awareness in the back of his mind. "What are you going to ask if you win?"
Tobias felt his chest constrict, knowing she would ask the question to which he had no answer. He exhaled slowly, counting the seconds it took him until he was empty, an old form of meditation taught to beginners when breathing and focus was a challenge. "I don't know," he said softly.
He felt Ieron remove her hand from his, placing it on his shoulder, the warm pressure somewhat comforting. "What do you want to ask her?"
Even though the room was dark, Tobias dropped his eyes, focusing on the vague shapes that were his hands. He wanted to give the same answer, to say that he didn't know, even though he did - or at least had an idea.
"Ieron, I just want her to be safe - and to be happy. To have all of the things she had before - before all of this happened." His baritone voice was hushed and in his brain, he was still counting even though he'd long since stopped exhaling. Tobias didn't add the second part - that these were things he couldn't give her - knowing that Ieron would disagree.
He didn't want to get in another argument with her over it - and even moreso didn't want to be forced to admit that maybe she did understand what he wanted, more than he could tell her.
"I know, Master," was her only response.
They sat in silence until Ieron squeezed his shoulder. "Come on," she said, her own voice quiet. The mattress eased up as Ieron stood, and Tobias followed suit. She turned, facing him, and the Jedi Master could see the light from the hall and what little was being emitted from the banks reflecting on the damp surface of her eyes. "It sounds to me like you have a game to lose."
***
Fully aware that General Iblis, for morale purposes, had opened the officer’s lounge for the whole crew so they may watch her and Tobias play the game which so many had wagers on, Koria put on what she called her stage face. She was determined that no one, especially Tobias, would know her lack of enthusiasm to go through with it. As she waited for him to show up, she chatted good-naturedly with various members of the crew, laughing and flirting. She was talking to Sergeant Calder and his fiancé, Della, and her parents when she sensed someone watching her. Turning her head, she spotted Tobias just inside the door and smiled as she waved to him.
Tobias felt his lips curl up in response to Koria's smile and lifted one hand in a stiff wave. He could feel Ieron at his back, following him into the officer's lounge, appreciative of her presence if not her last comment. He hadn't thought of throwing the game until Ieron had mentioned it, but now he couldn't get the idea out of his head. It seemed like a shameful path to take - but it was still an option. He shook his head, trying to clear the idea away and make his mind blank to concentrate on the upcoming game.
Bel Garm Iblis stood from where he was sitting next to Doctor Della Kern. Clearing his throat dramatically loud and tapping a spoon against his wine glass. "Okay, now that the famed players have arrived, I believe it's time to get this game started."
Koria laughed at the enthusiastic applause as well as the hoots and hollers in support of either herself or Tobias. As the two approached the table, she suddenly stopped and held up her hands. "Just a moment, part of the deal was for one of my hands to be tied behind my back." She looked over at the doctor. "Did you bring the binding?"
Standing, Della nodded and approached. "You know I bet against you. Do you still trust me to do the tying?"
"I trust you with my life, Doctor," she replied dryly. As her hand was being tied behind her, she glanced over at Tobias and winked as she quipped, "Don't get any ideas about bondage after I win, Master Jedi."
The crowd sniggered, and Sergeant Calder said loudly, "Score one for Koria."
Tobias raised his eyebrows, his face the picture of blank innocence. "Senator, I believe you'll have to do a fair bit of orating to convince this crowd that I'm the one who shouldn't be getting ideas."
The laugher around the room rose, and the Corellian pilot said, "I'd give the Jedi two points for that one."
"Are we playing pool or gravball?" Koria giggled.
Finished tying the younger woman's hand, the doctor patted her shoulder. "How's that? Is it too tight?"
Koria wiggled around. "Nah, but you may wish to make it tighter, I can still move it a bit more than he can move his."
As the doctor made the final adjustments, Tobias walked over to the cue rack. He inspected them each before finding one the right length and heft. It felt comfortable in his hand, balancing nicely. He also selected a bridge, assuming that using the Force to support his cue in lieu of his left hand would also be discouraged. When he turned around, the Jedi Master gave a small bow to Koria. "At your pleasure, Senator," he said respectfully, gesturing to the table.
Passing by Tobias to select her own pole, she paused next to him as she spoke sotto voce, “Don’t call me that anymore. I stopped being 'Senator' the night Anakin turned. I’m as much a fugitive as you.” Her eyes were sad as they briefly met his, but she smiled. She then looked away and chose her stick and bridge. As she turned back towards the table, she looked up at him. “I would actually prefer you to break.” She smirked as she added, “Wisdom before beauty.”
Tobias smiled at that, though still confused as to Koria's objection of her own title and her use of his. "You won't hear any argument from me on that front," he replied. He lined up the first shot of the game carefully and was gratified when the cue ball hit the other balls with a loud crack. The balls jumped apart, scattering across the table, and Tobias leaned against his cue, one corner of his mouth lifted, as one rolled into a corner pocket. "That would make you stripes," he added unnecessarily. There was no shot that he could easily make readily apparent, so Tobias used his next one to break up one of the small clusters of balls on the table.
Even as the cue ball came to rest less than a centimeter from the side of the table, Koria studied the possibilities, her competitive nature kicking in despite her reservations. Even as the spectators either moaned or muttered in speculation of how she would place the bridge, she smiled. "Nice placement."
She slipped off the shoe and sock of her right foot, then gracefully raised her leg and put the heel upon the table's edge. A part of her heard the murmurs around the lounge, and reveled in the attention while a bigger part of her concentrated on what she was doing. Leaning the foot over slightly and putting the cue stick between her first two toes, she took aim. One solid ball was between the cue and the number 9 stripe, which was just near the side pocket. With her tongue poking slightly out the corner of her otherwise closed mouth, Koria hit the cue ball, and it hopped over the number three and hit the nine. The yellow stripped ball obliged by going in as the cue ball hit the table and rolled a little bit in the opposite direction.
"Is that even allowed?" Kemin asked quietly in Ieron's ear as he stood behind her. He had been sitting at the corner of the bar, keeping a low profile as he watched everything going on. He proffered a glass to the other Knight as he sipped his own drink.
Ieron took the glass and drank some of it before shrugging. "I guess it depends on if Tobias want to contest it. The game is already unorthodox - and she did keep her other foot on the ground." As Ieron trailed off, Tobias nodded at Koria, his eyes flickering from the table to her and back again. Ieron narrowed her own at her Master. "He's up to something," she said flatly.
Shifting slightly to stand beside Ieron, Kemin placed one hand on her lower back. "He wouldn't cheat." It was more a statement than a question. His mind was more on the woman beside him than the game. He wanted to spend as much time with her before she had to leave for the undercover mission she'd assigned herself. He had arranged with General Iblis to go undercover as a maintenance operator near where she would be located. It was hoped that if something went wrong, he could provide a way for her to escape. He caught the general's eyes briefly before they both turned their attention back to the game. However, she hadn't yet spoken to the general herself, and Kemin wasn't looking forward to the fallout once she found out what he had done.
Koria moved around the table with the natural grace of a Twi'lek dancer as she set up her shots. Using the mechanical bridge, she'd sank four more balls before scratching on the fifth. Shrugging, she reached in to pull out the cue ball and tossed it lightly to Tobias. "You're in control now."
Tobias deftly caught the cue ball and bowed to Koria with an enigmatic smile upon his face before studying the table. Placing in the most advantageous position, Tobias managed to simultaneously sink both the number three and seven into the side and a corner pockets. The cue ball rolled to a stop in a place that would give Tobias several promising easy shots. As he aimed to put the two in another corner, he saw Koria leaning over to look at his shot from across the table. Her blouse, already low cut, gave him a view of a pocket unrelated to the table. Knowing what she was doing, he chose to ignore the ploy even as he privately enjoyed the view. He hit the cue ball and sank the two, the white ball rolling to a stop in a position that nicely set up his next shot. This continued while Koria continued different distracting ploys, but Tobias remained focused. Bringing the game to a tie, he gazed over at her, their eyes meeting briefly before he turned his attention back to the table. His thoughts had drifted from the game back to the confrontation between him and Koria's parents, wondering what their assessment of the game was. The distraction was too much, and this time the green six ball didn't cooperate, stopping just short of dropping into the side pocket.
As the crowd of onlookers either sighed with relief or groaned loudly, depending upon whom they'd placed their bets, Koria narrowed her eyes at Tobias. That shot wasn't any harder than the others. What are you up to? She clenched her teeth slightly as she thought, You bastard, you're letting me win, aren't you? The thought offended her, even as she felt further humiliated that her flaunting herself had no apparent effect upon him. Looking at the table, her jaws worked side to side as she ground her teeth. Two can play that game. Though making it look like she was aiming for the twelve ball, she missed and the cue ball hit Tobias's six into the corner pocket, fouling once more.
Shoyma glared at her daughter, not fooled for one second by her daughter's performance. Standing, she quickly stalked over to Koria and took her elbow. "Come with me."
"Hey, I'm trying to play a game here!"
"Excuse us," the Twi'lek woman ignored her daughter's protest as she looked at Tobias, daring him to argue.
Tobias looked at the door through which the two women had exited in confusion. He glanced back at where Ieron was standing, leaning against the bar. "Did I miss something?" he asked, the question directed at her despite the fact everyone could hear him.
"Maybe her mother decided Koria needed a few last minute pointers," the Jedi Knight replied. She raised her eyebrows at Dr. Kern. "Is that within the rules? You're officiating."
Dr. Kern shrugged. "Refresher breaks are allowed. As long as it's Koria making the shots, she can listen to any advice she chooses."
***
"What the kriffin' hell are you playing at, little girl?"
Koria's face reddened in both anger and embarrassment. To have her mother pulling her into the refresher in public like a wayward child was humiliating. "The game is pool, if you'll recall."
"I thought your father and I raised you better than to throw away a game!"
"I'm not, it was just a bad shot." She turned away from her mother's intense gaze as she added, "It's not easy to play with your hand tied behind your back, you know."
"What happened to us, Koria? You never lied to me before."
Koria bowed her head as her shoulders slumped. "What's the use in winning if he doesn't want me with him?"
Shoyma blinked as she stared at her daughter's back for a moment before placing a hand between her shoulder blades and gently rubbing. "I don't understand. Did you have a wager with him on this game?"
Raising her head to stare at the ceiling, Koria hiccuped as she nodded. "If I win, I can stay with him... he won't leave me. If he wins, he gets to ask me to do whatever he wants."
"So, you think he doesn't really want you to stay with him, and you're throwing the game?"
"I-i was going to, but when we started the game... well, when I saw him walk in... I... well I decided not to, but then..." She turned to look imploringly at her mother, begging her to understand. "He wasn't even distracted by my flirting with him... he..." Shaking her head, Koria sighed, "He doesn't need me, and I'm not going to force myself on him."
"Aw, Kor," Shoyma pulled her into a hug, "you are so much like your father. Honey, Tobias may not be able to show it like other men, but he needs you... perhaps moreso because he can't show it."
Koria returned her mother's hug. Her voice was muffled as she buried her face in the older woman's shoulder, "How can you tell?"
"Call me crazy, but when your father and I caught you and the good Jedi in the observation room, I saw me and my Kal when we were younger."
Koria giggled as she pulled away. "You are crazy. Tobias is Uncle Hemry's age."
"Well, at least I hooked up with a guy near my age."
"Yeah," Koria sighed as she looked away once more.
"Kor honey, hang in there. Don't give up."
The younger woman looked up in surprise. "I thought you were against me and Tobias."
"I just want you to be happy, and I have a feeling you won't be until you and he are married with a bunch of toddlers at your feet, swinging sabers while singing and dancing."
Koria laughed.
"Come on, let's get back out there and win this game already."
"If I can... he only has one more ball to sink before going for the eight, and it's his turn."
Shoyma reached out and squeezed her daughter's hand. "Whatever, the Force has a way to make things turn out the way it wants... or else you wouldn't be here."
Koria hugged her. "Thank you, mom. I love you."
"I love you too, sweetheart," she pulled away and swatted the younger woman on the butt. "Now get out there, will ya?"
"Ow," Koria exclaimed with a laugh before leaving the refresher.
All heads turned towards them as Koria and her mother emerged from the refresher, and an unnatural silence fell, indicating that she had been the topic of conversation up until her entrance.
"So that makes it my shot," Tobias said softly, his voice carrying in the silence. He turned away from the two women, uneasy about the hard, speculative look that Shoyma gave him as she went to join her husband. He could envision another discussion, perhaps this one ending with Kal's fist actually connecting with his nose.
His eyes were on the table, but his mind had wandered back to a few days ago in the observation room. He thought again about what Ieron had said, but in the end, the Jedi Master couldn't bring himself to throw the game. His eyes flickered to Ieron, who had a look of concentration on her face. Kemin was behind her, although he appeared to not be focused completely on the game. Tobias reached out, grabbing a square of chalk. As he rubbed it onto the tip of his cue, he sketched out angles for what could potentially be his second to last shot.
Koria was grateful to Tobias for calling everyone's attention back to himself. Though she understood why her mother had dragged her away for their little conversation, she was still abashed about being treated like a disobedient youngling in front of the crew. She bit her lip nervously as she watched him. She hoped that he hadn't tried throwing the game like she'd thought earlier, but at the same time, that he would mess up again. Not much chance of that with him able to place the ball wherever he wants now.
Tobias positioned the bridge, lining up the shot. He drew a deep breath, ignoring everything around him, and made the shot as he exhaled. The ball bounced off the far end of the table, rolling lazily until it dropped into one of the side pockets. Tobias suddenly became aware as the buzz of conversation in the room sharply crescendoed as new odds were being offered to late betters and speculations on what to do with the winnings became the new topics of discussion.
Stepping back, Tobias surveyed the table again. It wouldn't be difficult to drop the eight ball at this point with the table nearly empty. He'd left his cue ball in good position. The Jedi Master allowed himself a moment of regret before reaching out with the cue to tap the corner pocket opposite him. "That pocket," he said, the conversation suddenly stopping to hear what he said and to avoid disturbing his shot. It took but a moment, and the black ball was in the pocket, leaving only the other two striped balls and the cue ball on the felt.
Koria's heart sank along with the eight ball. Even so, she kept her head up, her sorrow hidden by a rueful smile as she approached Tobias. After gently laying her pole on the table, she reached out to shake Tobias' hand. "Well played, Tobias. What is it you want for your award?"
He grabbed her hand, gently putting pressure on her fingers. The Jedi Master hoped that everyone was still working out how much they'd made or lost and complaining or praising the final odds. "I'd prefer to have that discussion in private," he said in a soft voice, his eyes on her hand.
Koria placed her other hand on the back of his, softly stroking his knuckles as she looked up at him. "Okay." She swallowed a lump in her throat before getting a mischievous glint in her eyes and winking. "Your place or mine?"
Tobias shook his head. "We'll go with yours. If I take you back to my bachelor's flat, everyone will just think we're up to something."
Koria looked him up and down meaningfully. "Well, you aren't... yet, Master Jedi."
The Jedi Master sighed, lifting his eyes up to the ceiling before muttering, "At least we got through the pool game without mentioning my stick or balls."
Koria giggled as she pulled away slightly then proceeded to wiggle for a few moments. She soon had the bandage that bound her arm behind her off. She folded it and placed it on the side of the pool table. At Tobias's raised eyebrow, she smirked, "It's nice being double jointed." She tilted her head towards the exit. "Let's go talk."
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earlybird-obi-wan
Registered:
Aug '06
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Date Posted:
9/15 9:30pm
Subject:
RE: Tender Shadows (USJS OCs; ROTS/IT; drama, action, romance) - Updated 9.15.08
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