Author Topic: My Once and Constant Savior, Han/Leia AU, UPDATE 04 July
LASOS  295 posts
Registered: May '08
42796_Han Solo
Date Posted: 7/18/08 7:59pm Subject: RE: My Once and Constant Savior, Han/Leia AU spanning OT
JediMasterAmanda: Thanks! Mace will reveal himself, but he's still working on a few things...

alderaanprincess: Aw, glad you thought it was cute. Baby? We'll see...

DarthIshtar: Masterfully? Wow, that's high praise! And yes, it was a teaser, or rather, a glimpse into the future.

dm1: Yep, you got it, Mace deflected the bolt. And Leia's a good shot, but I'm pretty sure she had a little help with her aim. Mace was playing pretty close attention. And do they make up? Eh, probably. happy

Golden_Jedi: That was a much longer delay in updating than I intended! Sorry to keep you hanging!

JediNat: Ah! Sorry to leave you hanging, too! Hopefully the next delay won't be so long.

YmaSolo: Thank you! Glad that you liked that line. It was one of my favorites.

owphoenix: Hi! Welcome! Glad that you like it so far and I will definitely add you to the PM list.

PonyTricks: Yeah, they're pretty stubborn...

YmaSolo: Thanks for waiting patiently! Caramel popcorn sounds yummy. I'll leave brownies this time. happy

JediXManSerenaKenobi: Thank you and welcome! I will definitely PM you!

DarthIshtar: Thanks for waiting. happy

LittleCat: Hi there and thank you so much! Glad you're here. I will definitely PM you!

Hey guys, the reviews=AWESOME! They make me go like this: grin . I'm so, so, so sorry about the long wait and I will try extra hard to make sure the next post comes sooner!

 

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"STAR WARS Episodes IV-VI are to be referred to as "The Original Trilogy." Episodes I-III are not to be referred to at all." - FakeAPStylebook
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LASOS  295 posts
Registered: May '08
42796_Han Solo
Date Posted: 7/18/08 8:18pm Subject: RE: My Once and Constant Savior, Han/Leia AU spanning OT

Chapter Thirteen: Old Habits

“I’m not calling for a second chance; I’m screaming at the top of my voice; Give me reason; But don’t give me choice; ‘Cause I’ll just make the same mistake again...”
James Blunt, “Same Mistake”

--

Two-Onebee was waiting with an impatient Chewbacca and a concerned Luke in the hangar bay as Leia gracefully landed the Falcon back on Hoth. She had commed ahead to inform Echo Base of Han’s injury, and though he was stable and feeling much better, they both knew it was better for him to have it treated by a doctor. Leia had never been so grateful to see an overprotective Wookiee in her life. Chewie boarded the ship the instant the ramp was lowered and made his way to the cabin where Han was sleeping with barely a grunt in Leia’s direction. She let out a breath she didn’t know she’d been holding as she left the Falcon, relieved of her duty of finding the right words to say to Han next.

Luke was waiting for her at the bottom of the exit ramp, a small smile dancing across his face.

“Did you finally shoot him? I think Wedge owes me some money.”

She couldn’t help but smile and shake her head as she embraced her dear friend.

“No, but I thought about it.”

Luke studied her for a moment with inquisitive blue eyes and she got the uneasy feeling that he was inside her thoughts.

“Something bad happened,” he said.

Leia sighed and they began to walk towards her quarters.

“Yes. I just can’t talk about it yet.”

“Dinner?”

“Perhaps.”

Luke furrowed his brow.

“We can take it in the med bay with Han.”

“No,” she said quietly. “I don’t think that would be a good idea.”

He paused for a moment but decided not to comment.

“I have to go out on surveillance soon, but I can come find you when I get back.”

She nodded in acceptance but said nothing.

“How did the mission go?”

“Accomplished. Actually, that was the only thing that went right.”

There was an uncomfortable silence between them as they reached her door, Luke still searching her for answers. Finally, he put a reassuring hand on her arm.

“Leia, you can tell me.”

Tears came to her eyes for what felt like the hundredth time in the last three days, but again she refused to let them fall. Instead, she gathered Luke into a firm embrace.

“I will soon, I promise. You’re a dear, dear friend, Luke.”

He smiled and left her then with a promise to find her when he reported back in. Sighing, Leia entered her quarters and checked the datapad lying on her bed. She shut it off again several moments later with a scowl at the sheer number of unchecked messages and tossed it onto her bedside table with a mental promise to answer them later. Almost violently, she tore off her still-muddy rain clothes and left them unceremoniously in a heap on the floor, opting for a long, hot water shower instead of mentally taxing work. Leia emerged from the sanctuary of her ‘fresher an hour later to the persistent chiming of her private comlink. Donning her nerf-hide slippers, which proved to be welcome protection against the frozen floors, she crossed the small room and answered the call.

“Princess,” came Rieekan’s voice, “Your father is on the comm from Sullust. Can I patch you through?”

“Please, go ahead, Carlist.”

There was a click and a flood of warm relief washed over her tired body as she heard the welcome velvet tones of Bail.

“Lelila. Are you all right?”

“Yes, Father, I’m fine. The mission went well, but we were confronted and--”

“I know. Carlist told me that Captain Solo was shot.”

“He was trying to protect me.”

“Yes, I know that, too.” Bail’s voice betrayed the hint of a smile. “Carlist also said that Han is already out on surveillance with Commander Skywalker.”

She paused.

“Oh. I suppose he’s fine, then.”

“Yes, I suppose he is.”

Bail waited for a moment for Leia to say something, but she didn’t so instead he continued.

“Preparations are going well. Gamma Base is ready should Echo need to be evacuated.”

“That’s good to hear,” she said, wearily. “I have a feeling that we won’t be here much longer.”

“Leia, are you sure you’re fine?”

“I am, I promise. Just tired.”

“Well rest up. See you soon, Lelila. I love you.”

“I love you, Father.”

The comm ended with a click and Leia sank down on her bed, pulling the thick blankets around her robed body. Her intention was to lie there for just a moment, but she awoke four hours later and two hours late for her shift, swearing loudly when she realized the time. Quickly, she braided her hair in a simple, low-maintenance style around her head and donned her Alliance-issued snowsuit and vest and made her way to Command Center, a destination that very soon proved to be a mistake.

Han entered the center an hour later, in from what he announced had been his last time offering the Alliance any sort of assistance. Her heart tightened painfully in her chest as she heard him tell Rieekan that he was leaving and she fought frantically against herself to find some final reason to convince him to stay. But she only managed to assume the role of standoffish ice princess, to which he replied by storming out of the center in a huff. His ire, however, stoked hers, and she melted quickly into haughty, accusatory child on the edge of a temper tantrum.

“I thought you had decided to stay,” Leia asserted angrily, stupidly, though he hadn’t once in the past few days given her any indication that he would. She felt foolish for saying it, as if she thought the Corellian womanizer before her might actually care enough about her to put everything else aside. Their fight did not rival that of the flight to Ord Mantell, but the sentiment was the same. He was stubborn and she was more so and such a shared flaw in character meant that he would leave her forever without either of them admitting their passionate, desperate need to be near the other.

Han stormed off again with his last final insult, leaving her standing alone and incredulous in the South Passage. She stood there for a moment, fully incapable of doing anything but stare, before movement finally returned to her body and she stalked away in the opposite direction to her quarters.

What she found there did nothing to help her mood. Someone, or something, with the very best of intentions, had turned on the small heating unit in the corner of her room after she had left. The heat emanating from the little cube had already begun to melt her ceiling and soften her walls. Her bed was soaking wet from the melting ice, and the datapad that she had thrown on the side table haphazardly looked to have shorted out completely. Frustrated, she glanced down at the chronometer on her wrist. If Han had gone out on surveillance with Luke, the younger man should have reported in by now, which meant he also should have come to find her for dinner at least half an hour ago. She found her comlink in one of her vest pockets and dialed Luke’s code, which beeped but was not answered. Then, she dialed Han’s code, but the call went straight to his messaging system and she knew that he had turned it off.

Livid, Leia hurled the comm unit into the wall, but instead of shattering into a hundred pieces with a satisfying crack, it only imbedded itself into the slowly melting walls of her room. Rolling her eyes, she walked across the room and retrieved the unit, thumbing it on once again.

“Mistress Leia,” came the cheerful voice of Threepio as he answered her comm. “Artoo and I came to your quarters earlier and found them to be quite below the standard temperature for humans, so we turned on your heating unit. I hope you find the temperature to be satisfactory when you return.”

“Ugh,” Leia groaned. “That was you? Threepio, you melted my ceiling!”

She heard a series of beeps on the other end, which she decided was Artoo-speak for ‘I told you so.’

“Oh, I’m terribly sorry, Princess, I only meant--”

“It’s fine,” she said quickly, interrupting him before the protocol droid got any further in his mind-numbing rambling. “Listen, I need you to find Captain Solo. He’s turned off his communicator. Luke hasn’t reported in yet and I’m worried about him. Comm me when you’ve spoken with him.”

Leia ended the call rather violently as Threepio made his long-winded acknowledgement of her request and set herself to the task of salvaging what little she could from water damage. She packed a small bag with one of her white gowns, a pair of boots, her datapad that had been spared, the nerf doll that Han had given her two years ago, and a toothbrush, and set out to find her cabin on Home One, careful to take the long way into the hangar bay in hopes of avoiding Han. A night in her more lavish quarters aboard the powered-down Mon Calamari cruiser, no doubt, would be preferable to a night in a bed that would probably be a solid sheet of ice by the time she returned. She settled into her room and had just activated her datapad when her comm chimed gently, indicating Threepio’s code.

“Mistress Leia,” came the mechanical voice, “Master Luke never reported in and Captain Solo has gone out to look for him.”

She felt the color drain from her face.

“He what?”

“He has gone outside base to search for Master Luke,” the droid repeated.

“Oh, shavit,” Leia hissed.

Abandoning her things, she sprinted off the cruiser and out into the hangar bay, reaching Rieekan, Chewie, and Artoo before Threepio even realized she had abandoned the call.

“Leia,” Rieekan said calmly, bracing himself for an inevitable verbal onslaught. Leia gave him the most accusatory look she could muster, but he had seen it before and it had little effect.

“Carlist, how the hell could you let him go out there?”

“He was gone before I even heard he left. The deck officer tried to stop him.”

“He’ll die! They both will. We have to do something!”

Rieekan shook his head apologetically.

“It’s too cold for the speeders and the tauntauns won’t survive long enough to send out a search party. There’s nothing we can do until sunrise.”

She glanced towards the open shield doors and out into the frozen wastelands of the planet, a darkening abyss in the rapid nightfall.

“We need to keep the doors open in case they make it back.” Even as she said it, she knew it was a futile hope. If Han and Luke were going to survive the night, they wouldn’t do it by trying to make it back to base.

“I’ll send out the scanners. And we can keep the doors open until 2100. Any later than that and we risk a rapid drop in temperature in the base.”

Leia looked at him helplessly and in that moment Rieekan saw her not as the strong young woman that she had been for so long but as the little girl he had known on Alderaan. That little girl hadn’t existed since Breha’s death over sixteen years ago. Little Lelila matured very quickly after her adopted mother died, and it broke Rieekan’s heart to see her lose her innocence at such a young age. The losses she had suffered in her twenty-two years had been more than most would experience in a hundred lifetimes, but even after Alderaan she never let those losses show. In that moment, suddenly, the despair cracked through her carefully constructed durasteel walls. And in that moment, Rieekan saw that the loss of Luke Skywalker, and even more the loss of Han Solo, would break her.

He didn’t know that Leia could be broken.

Defeated, she cast a glance at Chewie. The Wookiee growled, assuring the princess that he would be out there with Han if he’d had any idea the brash captain was going to look for Luke.

“Well,” Leia sighed, finally, “what next?”

Rieekan patted her arm in a sympathetic gesture that filled her with fear.

“We wait.”

--

Of all the sleepless nights Leia Organa had spent on the Falcon, this was the worst. She and Chewie were a silent and mournful pair, perhaps each the other’s worst companion because neither of them could offer any comfort. The Wookiee was particularly upset. He had been angry that Han was wounded on Ord Mantell without him there, and the fact that he could do nothing to help his old friend now was an additional blow. He spent much of the night attempting to occupy himself with repairs, letting a melancholy wail echo off the walls of the ship every now and then. Chewie’s guttural moans reverberated in her soul, tearing at what little sanity she had left, reminding her that the truest friends she’d ever had might never be found.

She had always been impatient, always hated waiting, but the helpless feeling that was pervading her body brought back horrible, stinging memories of Tarkin giving the order to fire on Alderaan, awful memories that would never truly heal. Chewie had offered to let her do a bit of welding on the ship after she threw her surviving datapad against the wall at 0305 and finally got her satisfying shatter. She took the welding assignment only because she was desperate for something else to think about, something other than her dear Luke dying or Han freezing to death without her ever having the courage to tell him the truth, but she was so adept and finished so quickly that at 0350 the only thing left for to do was sit there and wait.

Leia dropped unceremoniously, exhaustedly, into Han’s seat in the cockpit and stared out the transparisteel to the cursed shield doors, cold, unmoving, and mocking her with their motionlessness. She scowled as her final exchange with the Falcon's captain played through her mind for the thousandth time that long, lonely night. That fight in the south passage had nothing to do with the things they said and everything to do with the things they had chosen not to say. Leia revisited the shouting match again and again, each time trying to imagine herself saying the things she couldn’t, each time even her mind prevented her from doing so. She curled her knees into her chest and rested her head on her kneecaps, hoping that she could block everything else in her little cocoon. And then suddenly, surprisingly, Leia’s eyes snapped open with the most obvious realization of her life. She was scared to love him. And she found that ridiculous. She had never been one to live her life in fear. Why had she spent the last three years being afraid of Han Solo?

She was startled awake two hours later by the roar of a Wookiee, surprised to find herself in what had become her bed on the Falcon for the past three years, carried there by that same Wookiee who had found her curled in a little ball, asleep in Han’s chair. Her heart felt as though it was going to beat out of her chest as she made her way to find Chewie, unsure if his outburst was one of joy or of sorrow. She got her answer, though, as she entered the galley and the walking carpet scooped her into a hug so fierce she was certain at least two of her ribs had cracked. They made their way off the ship and were joined by Threepio and Artoo, the four of them fighting through a gaggle of thrilled Rebels anxious for a glance at the two heros that had, once again, beaten all the odds.

Luke was unconscious and her stomach lurched when she saw the deep gashes across his face, but she heard Two-Onebee say that he only needed a few hours in the bacta tank as he was whisked away on the repulsor-stretcher, relieving her tension ever so slightly. Han climbed out of the ship easily and was greeted with a hug from Chewie similar to the one Leia had just received. He made his way through a chorus of back-slaps, handshakes, and well wishes, separating himself with the claim that all he wanted was a hot shower and a shot of Whyren’s Reserve, and then found himself standing in front of the ramp to the Falcon, its entrance blocked by one one petite princess that couldn’t seem to decide which emotion she wanted to display on her face. He saw relief, anger, confusion, gratitude, desire, hurt, worry, and elation almost all at once before she settled on a nondescript and very political sabacc face. They regarded one another for a moment, hearts still burning with that unspoken love and that unflinching anger from the days before, unsure of what to do next.

Finally, Leia crossed the gap in a gesture that surprised them both. She wrapped her arms around his waist in a firm hug and whispered the only truth she could manage into his chest.

“I’m glad you’re safe.”

Han smirked as she let him go.

“Missed me, huh?”

Her jaw set firmly in frustration and she narrowed her eyes. He didn’t know what made him say it. He only knew that somewhere in the night he realized just how much it was going to hurt to leave her and he had to say his goodbyes in the only way he knew how.

The fighting didn’t make it any easier, but it was the reflexive reaction.

“So we’re here,” Leia said, coldly. She didn’t want an answer, because she already knew. He was back to flinging insults and innuendo and she was back to pretending she didn’t care about him. It was as if their relationship hadn’t changed at all in the past three years.

“Yes,” he replied simply. She pursed her lips and gave a curt nod, then spun quickly on one heel and walked away from him.

“Hey, Princess,” Han called. Leia paused, but she did not turn around.

“‘Safe’ is a relative term.”

--

Han didn’t know why he said it.

They had chosen not to speak after she’d left him in the hangar bay, after he tried for the very last time to make her see why he had to leave. He found her in the med bay an hour later keeping a silent vigil over Luke in the bacta tank just as Han had done in the frozen makeshift shelter the night before. He stood near her but couldn’t bring himself to stand next to her, to say anything to her, to offer her any sort of assurance that he might come back to her. So instead they didn’t speak again until Luke was awake and out of the tank. And when he opened his mouth, the words that came out did nothing to fix things between them.

“Well, Your Worship, looks like you managed to keep me around a little longer.”

She returned his smirk with flawless accuracy.

“I had nothing to do with it. General Rieekan thinks it’s dangerous for any ships to leave the field until we’ve activated the shield generator.”

“That’s a good story. I think you just can’t bear to let a gorgeous guy like me out of your sight.”

And just like that, he started another fight. He tossed a few lewd comments her way and she did her very best to come up with a stinging insult. “Nerfherder” had been a new one. He’d wanted to laugh when she called him “stuck-up” because it was a phrase he’s used to describe her more than once in the past three years. But then she gave him the equivalent of a sucker punch to the gonads and kissed Luke squarely, if awkwardly, on his lips and sauntered out of the room, smug in her knowledge that she’d won that particular battle. It took him a moment to recover, and he was really only jolted to the present at the sound of an alarm and a summons to Command Center.

To his credit, and to Leia’s credit as well, they had become adept at putting aside whatever differences they had for the sake of the Alliance. As soon as Threepio suggested that the code coming in over the system could be Imperial, he threw on his parka and went out with Chewie and she slipped on the headset. Han marveled for a moment at how difficult it was to have her voice whispering in his ear. It was like a dance, a Corellian waltz, or something closer, sexier, like a sensual tango he’d seen once on Tatooine. They pushed away, jumped back, retreated, only to press their bodies together again, melting into the other, becoming one. Her voice, pinched and deft though it was, resonated within him, settled within him, danced against his ears.

He ached for her.

When the evacuation alarms later sounded and the walls began to shake at the explosions from the battle raging outside, he told himself he was only going to see her to her transport. He knew Leia and her endearing and infuriating tendency to be the last one off base. It was how he’d first gotten to know her three years ago. It was one of the many things he loved about her. And he loved her too much to leave her to be buried under a collapsed and frozen base, or worse, captured and tortured all over again. He wasn’t expecting to have the good fortune to be the one to take her to Sullust. But he also wasn’t expecting to have the terrible fortune of a broken hyperdrive. He got lucky with the asteroid belt. If they had been in any other system, if they had chosen a planet with less meteor activity, the Falcon and its crew would have been in range of the Executor's tractor beams in no time, pulled into an almost certain death.

Even in the relative security of the crater, even given the time to make repairs to the hyperdrive, Han didn’t really believe that they were going to make it past the clutches of the Empire. He struggled with his thoughts as fiddled with the reverse alternators and felt the knot in the pit of his stomach tighten with every muted explosion he heard at the surface of the asteroid. He didn’t regret not leaving earlier and he didn’t regret getting Leia off base, but he did regret putting her in such a situation. He thought of Bail and the trust the older man had placed in him. He felt as though he’d let them all down.

Han’s first thought as he found Leia welding the valves he had assigned her was to apologize for dragging her to her almost certain death. His second thought as he moved to help her turn the valve was how beautiful she looked when she was frustrated.

The thought on which he acted, however, was that he would never get this chance with her again.

--

If someone had told Leia Organa four years ago that she would one day fall in love with Han Solo, she would have signed an executive order to have them committed. But that would have been before she’d had her mind raped by a Sith Lord, before her body had nearly been broken at the hands of sadistic men serving an Emperor even more evil, before she’d been responsible for destroying billions of innocent lives. She was a completely different person than the little girl she’d been the day before she was captured by Darth Vader, and the woman she was now was the kind of woman that saw past scruffy exteriors and checkered pasts and dilapidated ships. The woman she was now could fall in love with scoundrels without a second thought.

She had imagined many times how it might feel to kiss Han. It was one of the few immature delights she thought a young woman of twenty-two with no worries in the galaxy might be allowed. She had wanted to kiss him in the snow on Hoth and in the rain on Ord Mantell and even on the beach on Oertzen VI. She remembered the ancient, knobby, and twisted tree that grew through the wide balcony off of her bedroom on Alderaan and had even imagined that her home had never been destroyed and she could kiss him in the shade that grew under those fat green leaves. In all her daydreams, their kisses had been soft and warm and sweet, like the gentle moments she had seen her parents share in her fuzzy memories.

Leia never thought that a kiss from Han would inspire the feelings that it did.

When he approached her, she had still been angry, so angry with him for all that had transpired since their voyage to Ord Mantell. So she rebuffed him, fought back, pleaded with him to stop touching her, because his touch only tortured her further. He rubbed her hand, his fingers igniting every nerve ending within her body. He accused her of trembling and she was, she was trembling because she knew exactly what was going to happen between them and everything inside of her was screaming, crying out, begging for them to meet.

And then they did.

Leia felt herself come alive as Han’s mouth met hers, his lips warm and soft. The spark between them in that instant was blinding, dizzying, intoxicating. She had never in her wildest fantasies imagined that pleasure such as this existed. His wet tongue danced against her bottom lip, teasing her with agonizingly slow strokes, and she opened her mouth ever so slightly to let him in. He tasted as she imagined snow might taste, sweet and cool and refreshing despite the heat of his mouth and lips and tongue. As if they had a mind of their own, her hands snaked up and around his neck, her fingers tangling themselves in his soft mop of brown hair, drawing him in closer to her. There was a fire between them, a passion that had never before existed in the galaxy. She wanted to stay locked against him forever.

And then suddenly she was cold. Never had a droid been in possession of such impeccably awful timing. They broke apart, startled at the interruption, and she felt the color rise to her cheeks as Han turned to greet the offending Threepio. She chose the moment to sneak away from them, for she did not know what to do next. What could she say to him now? They had been dancing around what they both knew for three years and then had come close to ending their relationship on the sourest of notes and were still almost certainly going to fall back into the hands of the Empire when they finally chose to leave the crater. And even if they didn’t, Han was still leaving, had still made it clear that he had chosen his life of carefree space pirating over a pursuit of justice. She was in love with a man that couldn’t be in her life much longer. So instead of addressing the moment with Han, she sought the solace of the dark cockpit and stared into a wide black abyss that would never be big enough to contain all of the questions in her mind and her heart.

--

“Thirty-six days,” Han sighed, finally. “That’s the fastest we can get there without causing any more damage to the ship.”

Leia was still watching the space where the last Star Destroyer had just disappeared into lightspeed, halfway expecting it to return. She sighed, leaning back into her seat, and Han turned the ship around, setting the coordinates for what was shaping to be a lengthy journey to Bespin, a destination in which neither of them had much confidence.

“Do you think we’re okay on supplies?”

Han nodded, turning his chair around to face her.

“We should be. Chewie and I were prepared for a long trip to Tatooine. We might have to survive on rations towards the end, but I think we can manage.”

She smiled a little.

“I think so.”

“The Anoat system,” he continued, “is pretty remote. I don’t think we’ll have to worry about much Imperial activity, especially since they think we went the other direction. Scavengers are a possibility, but I think we’re traveling at a fast enough speed that we don’t look like an abandoned ship.”

“You make it sound like we’re home free until Bespin.”

Han shook his head and chuckled.

“If only it were that easy.”

“If only,” Leia agreed.

They fell silent as they locked eyes, alone in the dim light of the cockpit except for a still-deactivated Threepio. Han brought his hands to rest on Leia’s knees, and to his surprise, she covered them with her own. He intertwined his fingers with hers and gave her a little tug. She leaned forward and he did the same until their foreheads were touching, hazel eyes still holding steady the gaze of brown.

“It’s not just going to be that easy,” Leia warned, her voice a husky whisper.

“I know,” Han replied with the half-smile that would make her knees wobble if she hadn’t been sitting down.

“It can’t be that easy,” she insisted, drinking in his breath, warm against her lips.

“I know,” he said again before he closed the small gap between their mouths in an electric kiss that was gentler than the one they shared earlier but was no less passionate. This time, it was Leia’s tongue that was the soft explorer, which Han welcomed freely. And this time, it was a kiss that allowed to end on its own, with no interruptions from droids or bounty hunters or Star Destroyers.

Leia grinned as they broke apart, a truer smile than he’d seen in a long time, and he felt his own smile spread across his face.

“Scoundrel.”

Han gave her an innocent look as she stood up.

“Who, me?”

Leia shook her head and reactivated Threepio.

“I’ve spent the past two nights wide awake and worrying about you, so I’m going to sleep now, hopefully for a very long time.”

“Yes, Your Worship.”

“Goodnight, Flyboy,” she called as she breezed out of the cockpit.

Han shook his head and turned to study the stars.

“Goodnight, Princess,” he whispered.

 

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"STAR WARS Episodes IV-VI are to be referred to as "The Original Trilogy." Episodes I-III are not to be referred to at all." - FakeAPStylebook
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LittleCat  64 posts
Registered: May '08
6577_Princess Leia
Date Posted: 7/18/08 10:54pm Subject: RE: My Once and Constant Savior, Han/Leia AU spanning OT
First reply!!! wOOt!

I loved this chapter. It worked in flawlessly with the OT and the missing scenes you strung in between were so sweet!! They're finally moving forward with their feelings, yay!! dancing

 

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"Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end." -Semisonic
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JediXManSerenaKenobi  1366 posts
Registered: Jul '07
49939_H547: Rogue
Date Posted: 7/19/08 5:54am Subject: RE: My Once and Constant Savior, Han/Leia AU spanning OT
OOH!! I loved this chapter!! You got their characters spot on. Wonderful job!

- Serena

 

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Crucified, laid behind a stone,
You lived to die, rejected and alone,
Like a Rose, trampled on the ground,
You took the Fall and thought of me... Above All. - Jesus is Love.
Proud Artist and member of the Talon Family! T-Squad 4ever!
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Golden_Jedi  3835 posts
Registered: Jun '05
43875_Han - Scruffy Lookin'
Date Posted: 7/19/08 6:15am Subject: RE: My Once and Constant Savior, Han/Leia AU spanning OT
I think you deserve a big AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW... grin

 

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New Bespin Café - come visit THE place for H/L fans http://boards.theforce.net/fan_fiction_resource/b10304/29538471
Diving (a H/L intertrilogy AU) http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/27836852
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alderaanprincess  199 posts
Registered: Feb '08
43259_Princess Leia
Date Posted: 7/19/08 7:43am Subject: RE: My Once and Constant Savior, Han/Leia AU spanning OT
another adorable chapter! I loved it and THANK YOU for making it so long. It fits perfectly with ESB and you are amazing at charactization!

 

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LEiA
"Sometimes I amaze even myself!"
"I don't know who you are or where you came from but from now on you do as I tell you. Okay?"
http://boards.theforce.net/beyond_the_saga/b10477/28196366/p1/?5
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JediNat  263 posts
Registered: Jan '08
42362_Han and Leia
Date Posted: 7/19/08 8:08am Subject: RE: My Once and Constant Savior, Han/Leia AU spanning OT
Awww.... what a great update!

 

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May the Force be with you!
I'm a little teapot short and stout here is my handle and here's a note from my shrink he says I'm getting better. Last week I thought I was a toaster oven *crazy laughter* -Dot
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JediMasterAmanda  5498 posts
Registered: Sep '05
48254_Mace Windu (422093)
Date Posted: 7/19/08 2:00pm Subject: RE: My Once and Constant Savior, Han/Leia AU spanning OT
awww that's a cute chapter. great update applause

 

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"Be faithful until death, and I will give you the crown
of life." Rev. 2:10
"Love thy neighbor as thyself." somewhere in the Bible
Future Tamaskan Owner
Jesus Saves. angel
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YmaSolo  83 posts
Registered: May '08
7399_Han and Leia
Date Posted: 7/19/08 8:29pm Subject: RE: My Once and Constant Savior, Han/Leia AU spanning OT
applause Nicely done. I love how you wove those together. Your description of their kiss was spot on! hugs

 

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It ain't Tatooine...
but it's darn close at 118 in the shade
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LASOS  295 posts
Registered: May '08
42796_Han Solo
Date Posted: 7/27/08 2:07pm Subject: RE: My Once and Constant Savior, Han/Leia AU spanning OT
Ah! So I know I promised I wouldn't make y'all wait long for the next post, but apparently I lied. blush I just got in from the DC-Baltimore-Philly circuit and didn't get much time to write, but I hope to have something up tonight. Thanks for being patient! *Puts out a large plate of double fudge brownies and ice cold milk.* happy

 

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"STAR WARS Episodes IV-VI are to be referred to as "The Original Trilogy." Episodes I-III are not to be referred to at all." - FakeAPStylebook
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dm1  2260 posts
Registered: Jun '04
6575_Princess Leia
Date Posted: 7/27/08 2:55pm Subject: RE: My Once and Constant Savior, Han/Leia AU spanning OT
Yum, yum, is it soy milk? Can't do the regular stuff...

You must be exhausted, we'll wait for your post. I love this story! The description of Han hearing Leia's voice in the headset was perfect, like the whole relationship! They keep dancing closer, then push each other away. over and over, until... Sigh!

 

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Hey, HSG, watch those explosives, be careful!!
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YmaSolo  83 posts
Registered: May '08
7399_Han and Leia
Date Posted: 7/27/08 3:22pm Subject: RE: My Once and Constant Savior, Han/Leia AU spanning OT
LASOS posted:
Thanks for being patient! *Puts out a large plate of double fudge brownies and ice cold milk.* happy


pig

MMM Brownies and Milk!!!

 

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LASOS  295 posts
Registered: May '08
42796_Han Solo
Date Posted: 7/27/08 10:37pm Subject: RE: My Once and Constant Savior, Han/Leia AU spanning OT
Okay! As promised, even though it's a little late. Sorry about that. I went to see The Dark Knight finally and had to take a minute to get over its awesomeness. If you haven't seen it yet, you should. I'm going to come back and do replies later, but here's an overall thanks for the feedback! And glad y'all like the brownies and cow/soy/rice/goat/2%/whole/skim/organic/hormone free milk. grin

--

Chapter Fourteen: Day Two

“Can you tell me how we got into this situation; I can’t seem to get you off my mind; All these ups and downs; They trip up our good intentions; Nobody said this was an easy ride; After all; We’re only human; Always fighting what we’re feeling...”
Jon McLaughlin, “Human”

--

The chrono on her wrist told her that she’d slept for fifteen hours, a glorious, deep sleep, uninterrupted by alarms or emergencies or bad dreams. Never in her life, save for perhaps the time she had been ill and in a medical coma, had she slept for so well or so long. She was refreshed, happy even. 0900, the chrono told her, though she didn’t know on exactly what time she was operating. The little clock automatically adjusted to the time of whatever system she was visiting and would set itself to Galactic Standard when she was in space, but she had fallen hard on it during the escape from Echo Base and cracked it. She knew the Falcon’s internal chrono also self-adjusted, so she made a note to compare the times, assuming the ship’s device actually worked.

As she moved to climb out of the bunk, she realized that her chrono wasn’t the only thing damaged when Han fell on her to protect her from the caving ceiling. She tenderly placed a hand on her lower ribs, grimacing at the touch.

“Ugh,” she said to no one at all. “I hope they’re not cracked.”

In her hurry to leave the ship after Ord Mantell, she’d left her extra white shimmersilk robe folded in the corner of her cabin, so she gingerly wrapped it around the camisole and thermals she slept in, the garments that she had been wearing beneath her snowsuit. Leia padded out into the ship, finding quickly that she was the only sentient being not snoozing away. See-Threepio was at the helm, talking with the ship’s computers in a language that she couldn’t understand, so she slipped quietly out of the cockpit before he realized she was there, careful to avoid getting sucked into a conversation with the droid. She made herself a pot of kaffe and carefully picked up the pieces of the datapad that she had smashed against the wall of the galley two nights ago. Leia knew that Han had a few datapads lying around, but she didn’t find any in the galley, so she decided to ask him if she could borrow one when he woke. Then she found the medkit and threw back a few oral analgesics with a sip of kaffe, hoping silently that they kicked in soon.

Sitting down at the dejarik table, Leia realized with a sarcastic smile that she had no responsibilities and nowhere to be for a little over a month; she was, in effect, on vacation. She decided that she would have preferred to relax on a tropical planet somewhere than on a half-working ship in the middle of the Anoat system, a planet like Neva or the shore country of Naboo, where so many of her friends on Alderaan used to spend the summer months. Of course, the Organa family didn’t know the meaning of the word vacation in any language. As a little girl, her vacations with Bail consisted of diplomatic missions or peace summits. Her father always had an agenda, a meeting to attend, and even as a young child, Leia had insisted she accompany him on his appointments. They never spent summers at the beach, settling instead for rare nights of walking along the shore behind the palace. More often than not, Leia spent her time away from school on Coruscant with Bail, soaking in the political system of the Republic and trying very hard to avoid ever meeting the Emperor.

Leia felt a pang of sadness as she thought of her father. Bail would be worried when she didn’t arrive at Sullust with the rest of the fleet. The Alliance might even assume her dead. She and Bail didn’t talk much of the two years he spent on Naboo and he assumed she had been killed by Vader, but she knew that the loss of his planet, coupled with the loss of his daughter, had not been easy for him. Bail was a strong man, it had been his example that Leia followed, but she wondered if he could handle the thought that his daughter had been killed once again.

At the sound of heavy footfalls, she lifted her eyes from the dejarik table and watched as Chewie entered the galley and fixed himself his own oversized mug of kaffe. The big Wookiee looked at her with what she thought was a smile and growled something that she didn’t understand.

“Is this something that I want Threepio to translate?”

Chewie nodded and she stood, walking with him to the cockpit.

“Threepio, can you interpret?”

“Oh, of course, Mistress Leia,” Threepio said, cheerily, as Leia sat down behind the pilot’s chair and Chewie took his regular seat. “I am, after all, fluent in over six--”

Chewie growled a warning and the droid, terrified, stopped himself immediately. She hid a smile behind a sip of kaffe and Chewie repeated what he had said to her just moments before.

“Princess, Chewbacca says that he is glad that you are on this journey with us and that Captain Solo has mentioned what a capable pilot you are.”

“Oh. Well, thank you, Chewie.”

The Wookiee growled again, and again Threepio translated.

“Chewbacca says, ‘You are welcome, Cub.’ He also says that he is happy you and Captain Solo have come to an understanding in your--” Threepio paused and looked from Leia to Chewie and back, confused. “Your...relationship?”

The color rushed to Leia’s cheeks, hot with embarrassment.

“Chewie, I don’t think--”

“Don’t think what?”

Leia looked up, startled, as Han walked in with his own mug of kaffe, wearing a pair of gray sweatpants and nothing other than a wide white bandage over the blaster burn on his side. If she was flushed after Chewie’s comment, she was positively crimson at the sight of Han’s firm, shirtless body and soft, grinning lips that she had kissed not so long ago.

“Uh, nothing,” she stuttered. Chewie gave a little guffaw as Han slipped past them and motioned for Threepio to get out of his chair.

“You can go recharge now if you want, Goldenrod.”

“Oh, thank you, Captain Solo. My circuits really were getting tired and this is a welcome break.”

“Yeah, yeah,” said Han, waving the droid out of the cockpit. He sat down in his chair and studied the instrument panel for a moment. “Looks like she’s holding steady, Chewie. We might need to take a look at the rear boosters today, and see if we can get the shield back to full power in case we come under another attack.”

Chewie growled an affirmative that Leia understood, but she resolved anyway to learn conversational Shriiwook in the next thirty-five days.

“Your Worship, I need you to monitor the navicomputer and scanners for glitches. I did some rewiring yesterday and I want to make sure I didn’t cross anything.”

She found herself startled by this comment. If she had been expecting any sort of discussion over their kiss, it wouldn’t come now. So instead, Leia smirked at him.

“Knowing you, that’s likely.”

Han rolled his eyes but said nothing.

“Oh,” she added, “I need a datapad. Have you got an extra I can borrow? And some clothes?”

“Yeah. I’ll look through later this afternoon.”

“Great.”

“Okay then,” Han said as he stood up, casting a sideways glance at Leia, “Chewie, let’s get started on the rear boosters.”

--

Leia studied the navicomputer and scanners until her eyes began to cross, but she was glad to have something to do. Chewbacca had brought her a datapad before he and Han went to work on the rear boosters and she had drafted a document, recording every movement the computer and scanners made with an accuracy that could only come from spending three years as a soldier instead of a senator. She was watching the instrument panel so intently, in fact, that she didn’t notice Han had slipped into the cockpit eight hours later until he was handing her a plate of food.

“Nerf steak sandwich,” he clarified as she took the welcome meal from his hands. “How’s it looking?”

“The navicomputer recalculates itself every half hour, but it always sets back on the same course. And the scanners haven’t picked up anything.”

Han frowned slightly.

“Well, that’s normal for the computer. It recalculates to make sure it’s finding the best route. Great for fuel efficiency, but not so great if you’re trying to lose someone.”

“And the scanners?”

“They’re broken. They should have at least picked up space debris.”

Leia pressed her lips together and nodded.

“I found some clothes for you,” he added after a moment. “They’re in your room.”

“Thanks,” she said, swallowing a bite of sandwich. She held it up so he could see. “Delicious.”

“Chewie made it. He’s a good cook, only I have to make sure he doesn’t serve the nerf still moving.”

Leia smiled.

“I like it still moving. Bleeding, anyway. It was a delicacy on Alderaan.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.”

They were silent for a moment as Leia gracefully polished off the last of her sandwich, Han watching her closely. She was still wearing dressed in the robe she’d had on earlier that day and her hair was thrown over her left shoulder in a casual, loose braid. Han was pleasantly surprised to see she looked as though she was at home on his ship. He couldn’t help but smile.

Leia gave him a quizzical look.

“What is it?”

“I’ve never seen you eat so much,” he teased.

She rolled her eyes and placed her empty plate on the instrument panel, but the twisting movement made her grimace. Han was kneeling next to her in a flash, a look of concern across his features.

“What’s the matter?”

“Nothing,” Leia assured, shaking her head. “I’m just sore from falling.”

“Let me see,” his hands moving over the smooth silk of her robe, feeling the muscles of her back beneath the thin fabric.

“I’m fine, really,” she said, trying to shrug him off.

“Let me see,” he repeated gently, casually hooking a finger around her collar and pulling the material back until he’d exposed the soft skin of her right shoulder.

“Han, please,” Leia breathed, shrinking away from him. She looked up at him with pleading brown eyes that startled him to his very core. He froze immediately.

“Do you think I’m going to hurt you?” Han said it quietly, but he winced at how accusatory the words sounded in his ears. She shook her head once, looking away again.

“No, it’s not that. I’m fine, really. I just need more pain pills.”

He frowned.

“You could have cracked a rib. I fell on you pretty hard.”

“Hmm,” was her only reply.

“At least let me feel,” he insisted. “Let me make sure nothing’s broken.”

Leia looked at him once again, struck by the gentle look that had settled on Han’s features. He wasn’t going to hurt her, he wasn’t going to undress her. He just wanted to make sure she was fine. Nodding, she stood up and let the robe fall off her shoulders, fighting back how exposed she felt standing before him in a tight camisole. His touch was delicate and his hands, though calloused, were smooth against her skin. He pressed gently into her back, moving down her ribcage until he found the tender area at the base of her back next to her spine.

“That’s it,” she said through gritted teeth.

“Does it hurt if I press harder?”

Leia paused for a moment as the pressure on her ribs increased. “No.”

“Okay,” Han murmured, tracing his fingers from the small of the back to her hips, “I don’t think it’s cracked.”

His fingers dallied over her left hip, but suddenly his hand froze and Leia inhaled sharply.

“Leia, what--”

“Don’t,” she said firmly even as he leaned in to study the tiny bump beneath her skin.

“What is that? Is that a chip?”

She wrenched herself away from his touch and pulled her robe back over her shoulders, closing it tightly. Her eyes met his, liquid brown pools that shocked him with the depths of their anguish.

“It’s nothing,” she said, firmly.

“It’s a prisoner’s chip,” he breathed, “isn’t it?”

Leia suddenly found the deck plates very interesting, but she still gave a curt nod.

“From the Death Star?”

Again, she nodded.

“Why didn’t you have it removed?”

“That’s not important.”

Han studied her with a set jaw for a moment. She had her arms folded around her body, making herself seem smaller than she already was. The anguished memories of her captivity on the Death Star stabbed at her body just as the needles and knives had three short years ago. He could almost feel her pain, her loneliness. Overcome with anything but the need to take it all away, he stepped forward, encircling her in his arms. Leia immediately stiffened, then jerked away from his embrace.

“What are you doing?” The sadness in her beautiful brown eyes had disappeared, frozen over once again, and it cut him to the core.

“Leia, I’m not--”

“Please, Han,” she interrupted. “Please don’t.”

He retreated a step, his hazel eyes narrowing, fixing on her.

“Don’t what? Don’t touch you?”

“Just...don’t.” She finally dragged her gaze to meet his. “Please.”

A look of simmering anger crossed his face and his hazel eyes darkened to a dangerous shade of green, but he choked down the words he wanted desperately to scream. Instead, he settled for a stiff nod.

“Fine.” His response was cold, a knife to Leia’s stomach. She pressed her lips together and dropped her gaze once again.

“Fine.” It was a resigned sigh before it was a word that died on her tongue. They stood together in for a moment in a silent standoff, but finally she conceded, arms still crossed, and pushed her way past him and out of the cockpit. Han was frozen, listening intently as she slunk down the corridor, and moved only after he heard her cabin door slide shut.

It would be three days before he saw Leia again, and in those moments she was absent Han could only marvel at her ability to disappear on such a tiny ship. He wondered how the Imperials had been able to find her in the first place.

--

The fur of the little nerf doll was soft and gray and it had been worn away at the ears. When she was younger, Leia would run the floppy ears of her brown doll between her fingers as she went to sleep. She did it because she saw Breha patting the ears of a nerf calf when the Organas had visited an Alderaani pasture when Leia was four. Breha told little Lelila that a nerf calf’s ears were the softest things she’d ever touched, and after her death, Leia recalled the memory often. The repetitive motion comforted the little girl and eased her mind during the difficult and dark nights when she missed her mother most of all. The tiny brown doll that she’d named Sellen had its ears replaced at least three times by the palace seamstress when Leia wore through them with her habit, and every time her doll went into ‘surgery’ the little girl had kept careful vigilance over the operation. Her habit, it appeared, had carried on even with her new doll, as its ears were thin and beginning to fray at the seams.

Bail Organa smiled sadly and hugged the gray nerf, a gift to his daughter from a cynical smuggler, a gift from a man that wanted to help her begin to rebuild all she had lost. Leia had packed a little bag and placed it her quarters on Home One before the evacuation on Hoth, perhaps in a moment of brilliant foresight, but she hadn’t made it to Sullust with the cruiser. In fact, she hadn’t made it to Sullust at all. Rieekan had found him immediately after the cruiser dropped out of hyperspace, delivering the news in person that Leia didn’t make it to her transport, though he had received a comm from Captain Solo saying that he would get her off base on the Falcon. Bail knew the battered Corellian freighter was not always mechanically sound, but he still held hope that the ship would arrive at Gamma Base over the next few days.

Six days after the evacuation of Echo Base, however, the Millennium Falcon and its passengers was still missing in action and Bail had all but given up hope that Leia survived the battle. The thought was almost debilitating. In times of war and in times of peace, Bail had been confronted with realities that tore at his soul, but none threatened to undo him like the reality that his only daughter was lost to him again. Without really thinking, he had taken a shuttle up to the cloaked Mon Calamari cruiser rotating in orbit with the three moons over Sullust. Rieekan had told him where Leia’s quarters were and given him an override code to get into the room, and the sadness he felt over the discovery of her pack and the little nerf doll threatened to consume him. He had seen so much death in his years, he had lost a wife and a family and a planet, but there was no grief that compared to the grief that followed the loss of a child.

Clutching the doll, Bail sank into an oversized white chair that Leia had angled to face the oblong viewport so she could take in the reaches of space whenever she glanced up from her work. Leia had always loved the sky, especially the stars. As a baby, she had been fascinated by starlight. Instead of rocking her infant form, Bail would sit with her in front of a window and let her watch the sky until she drifted into the space of her dreams. He felt both pride and fear when he saw that his baby girl embodied her true last name of Skywalker even as an infant.

There was a quiet knock on the durasteel entrance to the cabin, then the door slid open lazily, on its own, as Bail looked up. His hand dropped instinctively to his blaster, but he relaxed as soon as he saw the intruder.

“Security clearance worked, I take it?”

“Yes,” said Mace Windu as the door closed behind him. The old Jedi master walked over to the bed across from the chair Bail occupied and sat gingerly on the corner. “But you aren’t easy to find.”

Bail offered a wan smile.

“Good. That’s how we want it.” He paused, regarding the other man with resigned curiosity for a moment. “Leia didn’t make it here.”

Mace nodded. “I know.”

“We think she’s dead. Makes me wonder about prophecies and visions.”

“She’s not dead,” the Jedi said, shortly, taken aback by an almost immediate affront on his beliefs from the usually level Bail Organa. “She’s fine for now, and they’re together. They have to be together for anything to move forward.”

“Where are they? Did she go with him to pay off that crime lord?”

“No.”

Bail frowned.

“Do you know where they are?”

“He’s bringing her here. He wants to bring her here.”

Though he was a politician and a diplomat and capable of hiding his frustration over vague certainties and half-answered, he was not adept at hiding his displeasure from a Jedi that could read his silent emotions. Bail considered for a moment keeping his mask of polished indifference, but Mace almost certainly was aware of how he felt, so instead he allowed himself to become frustrated with the other man.

“What do you mean wants to bring her here? What are you not telling me, Mace?”

“I sense,” Mace said with a resigned sigh, “that something isn’t right.”

“Of course something isn’t right. They aren’t here yet. Have they been captured?”

The Jedi closed his eyes and was silent for a long moment, stretching as far as he could into the Force.

“No,” he said finally.

“Well, what is it? Are they in danger?”

Mace opened his eyes and locked his gaze on Bail, the steel in his brown orbs sending a chill into the Viceroy’s soul. The Jedi’s face was firm, set, grim. It was a seriousness like none Bail had ever seen before. When he spoke, his voice was low and cold and a thick, dreadful foreboding settled in the room on the tail of his words.

“Not yet.”

 

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"STAR WARS Episodes IV-VI are to be referred to as "The Original Trilogy." Episodes I-III are not to be referred to at all." - FakeAPStylebook
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JediMasterAmanda  5498 posts
Registered: Sep '05
48254_Mace Windu (422093)
Date Posted: 7/27/08 11:26pm Subject: RE: My Once and Constant Savior, Han/Leia AU spanning OT
great update applause

 

-----signature-----
"Be faithful until death, and I will give you the crown
of life." Rev. 2:10
"Love thy neighbor as thyself." somewhere in the Bible
Future Tamaskan Owner
Jesus Saves. angel
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JediNat  263 posts
Registered: Jan '08
42362_Han and Leia
Date Posted: 7/28/08 5:34am Subject: RE: My Once and Constant Savior, Han/Leia AU spanning OT
Great update! applause applause applause

“Well, what is it? Are they in danger?”

Mace opened his eyes and locked his gaze on Bail, the steel in his brown orbs sending a chill into the Viceroy’s soul. The Jedi’s face was firm, set, grim. It was a seriousness like none Bail had ever seen before. When he spoke, his voice was low and cold and a thick, dreadful foreboding settled in the room on the tail of his words.

“Not yet.”


Oh great! rolling_eyes worried

peace
-JediNat-

 

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May the Force be with you!
I'm a little teapot short and stout here is my handle and here's a note from my shrink he says I'm getting better. Last week I thought I was a toaster oven *crazy laughter* -Dot
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