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Topic:
"Life is Pain"~ Palpatine, Amidala ~ Humor~ Anakin's Anger Management Courses Humor Thread Response
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Quigonjecca
Registered:
Jul '07
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Date Posted:
7/12 2:35pm
Subject:
"Life is Pain"~ Palpatine, Amidala ~ Humor~ Anakin's Anger Management Courses Humor Thread Response
- Date Edited:
7/12 2:36pm (1 edits total)
Edited By:
Quigonjecca
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Challenge: A random funny quote from a movie needs to be worked into a scene in one of the Star Wars movies. Here's my quote and response.
My quote: Life is pain highness. Anyone who says differently is obviously selling something ~ From The Princess Bride
“Chancellor Valorum seems to think there is hope.”
Palpatine stopped his pacing just long enough to see a flicker of despair and anger fly through Amidala’s eyes. He pitied her and her position. A naïve girl of only fourteen didn’t really deserve to be or belong in Theed palace—much less act as Queen of Naboo.
He gave a soft sigh and shook his head. Adjusting the thick, blue folds of his robe he began to pace once more. “If I may say so your majesty…” the words stuck in his throat. “The chancellor has little real power. He is mired down by baseless accusations of corruption.” He paused then, to look out the window.
“Unlike me…” he muttered very softly to himself—so softly that Amidala only heard a faint whispering, and attributed it to the curtains.
Palpatine turned his cold, blue eyes on the girl. “A manufactured scandal surrounds him. The bureaucrats are in charge now.”
Amidala shifted her weight in the chair very primly, and gave a small sigh. “What options do we have?”
She could have sworn a slight smile passed over the senator’s pale face. “Our best choice would be to push for the election of a stronger Supreme Chancellor. One who will enforce the laws, and give us justice.”
Palpatine’s face looked as though a new idea had just dawned on him. “You could… call for a vote of no confidence in Chancellor Valorum?” He finished in one long breath.
Amidala sighed again, warily eying the man by the window. He seemed a bit eager. “He has been our strongest supporter.” She said with the best impression of incredulity she could muster. She had known this was coming all along. “Is there any other way?”
While Palpatine formulated his reply, Amidala ran a hand over her white face, taking care not to smudge her makeup. “There is so much pain, so much suffering…” She muttered, more to herself than the chancellor.
He looked over anyway with a curious arch of his eyebrow. “Hmmm?”
“I just want it to stop.” She said in a very small, high voice, unlike her queenly self. Palpatine took a step closer. Eirtae and Rabe exchanged glances. Panaka came a bit closer to the Queen.
“I don’t want any more war, any more suffering.” Amidala said, stronger this time. “The killing of innocents, the death of millions—why? Why do they cause such pain?”
Palpatine’s eyes had taken a dull cast. “Life is pain, Highness.” He said softly, as if not aware he was speaking at all. “Anyone who says differently is selling something.”
Amidala looked up, surprised. “What did you say?”
“Excuse me?” Panaka couldn’t help but inject.
“Uh… nothing… nothing at all.” Palpatine smiled. “I was just saying—“
“I see what you’re doing!” Amidala suddenly rose from her chair. She turned to Panaka. “He’s trying to become Chancellor himself!”
Palpatine’s eyes widened. “My lady I—“
“Don’t you play stupid with me!” She exclaimed, coming closer and pointing a finger at the man’s face.
Panaka started forward. “Queen Amidala is it wise to—“
“Why you little conniving beast!” Amidala exclaimed. She yanked away as Panaka laid a hand on her arm. “Get away from me!”
“Milady.” Panaka’s voice was stern. “I think you’re overreacting.”
“Excuse me?” Amidala lifted an eyebrow. “Don’t you think you can sneak off!” She whirled on Palpatine who was slowly starting to walk out of the room.
“I wasn’t sneaking, I was—“
“How can you explain tiptoeing out of this room then?”
At that moment Obi-Wan Kenobi ran into the room, lightsaber in hand. “Milady, thank the Force you’re alright.” He was panting slightly.
Panaka’s hand went immediately to his blaster. “What did you sense, Padawan Kenobi.”
“Malicious intentions from the senator.” He pointed to Palpatine.
Palpatine frowned. “That’s impossible!”
“The Force is my ally.” Obi-Wan calmly stated. “It is never wrong, it is—“
“ ‘It’s never wrong!’” Palpatine mocked in a whiny voice.
“Arrest him.” Amidala demanded.
“Milady, are you sure that is wise?” Panaka asked, even as he commed security.
“I’m Queen.” Amidala said. “I can do whatever I want.”
“This isn’t the last time you’ll hear from me! This isn't fair!” Palpatine shouted as he was handcuffed. “What was Naboo thinking—electing some moody teenager as Queen! This is ridiculous! Why, if you’re a Queen milady--I’m A SITH LORD!” Palpatine screamed as he was dragged out of the door.
“Wait,” Obi-Wan said, eyes widening.
Palpatine blanched. “I mean…”
Amidala shook her head at him. “So I was right, huh?” She laughed. “You are so busted.”
-----signature-----
Voted Best New Author in the 2008 Saga Awards! "Dark Child" http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/27658856/p1/?14
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Teresa
Registered:
Mar '07
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Date Posted:
7/12 3:25pm
Subject:
RE: "Life is Pain"~ Palpatine, Amidala ~ Humor~ Anakin's Anger Management Courses Humor Thread Respo
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 No matter how many times I see Palpy get screwed it's always enjoyable! One thing that always bothered me in the prequel trilogy was the fact that no one ever stops to consider Palpy's actions....... he's the one person who would have benifitted from the war whoever won! Padme and Obi-Wan rocked, and seeing Palpy dragged off cheered me up big time! Many thanks for the vignette!  
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JediXManSerenaKenobi
Registered:
Jul '07
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Date Posted:
7/12 3:35pm
Subject:
RE: "Life is Pain"~ Palpatine, Amidala ~ Humor~ Anakin's Anger Management Courses Humor Thread Respo
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Why, if you’re a Queen milady--I’m A SITH LORD!
Oh, man, you just made my day!!! Hilarious!!
- Serena
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" 'Do you believe in God?' written on the bullet/
Say 'yes' to pull the trigger / And I will pull the trigger!"
Talon Intelligence Squadron Artist! Talons rule!
*Proud member of Wrenga Jixton's Virtual Blondies!*
Christian=follower of Savior Jesus Christ
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Lisbev
Registered:
May '08
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Date Posted:
7/13 12:21am
Subject:
RE: "Life is Pain"~ Palpatine, Amidala ~ Humor~ Anakin's Anger Management Courses Humor Thread Respo
- Date Edited:
7/21 2:42pm (1 edits total)
Edited By:
Lisbev
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“Milady, are you sure that is wise?” Panaka asked, even as he commed security.
“I’m Queen.” Amidala said. “I can do whatever I want.”
You go girl! Now that's more like the strong, wise Amidala we all love. This is the way it should have happened!!! I've always thought it was strange in TPM how nobody questioned Palpy at all.
“The Force is my ally.” Obi-Wan calmly stated. “It is never wrong, it is—“
That’s right, Qui-Gon & Obi-Wan should have felt Palpy’s darkness.
Anywho, great job.
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Kyana-Morgaine
Registered:
Oct '04
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Date Posted:
7/13 11:27am
Subject:
RE: "Life is Pain"~ Palpatine, Amidala ~ Humor~ Anakin's Anger Management Courses Humor Thread Respo
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Great job!
Poor Palpy. He couldn't shut his mouth...
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Valairy_Scot
Title: PT Rewrite Winner
Registered:
Sep '05
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Date Posted:
7/15 5:48pm
Subject:
RE: "Life is Pain"~ Palpatine, Amidala ~ Humor~ Anakin's Anger Management Courses Humor Thread Respo
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Busted, all right.
-----signature-----
http://boards.theforce.net/fan_fiction_resource/b10304/25405090/p3/?52 Prolific Author thread: list & links there. Muse fueled by coffee. Often AWOL despite frequent sipping. Writes on inspiration, not a schedule. Proud master of several padawans
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earlybird-obi-wan
Registered:
Aug '06
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Date Posted:
7/15 8:50pm
Subject:
RE: "Life is Pain"~ Palpatine, Amidala ~ Humor~ Anakin's Anger Management Courses Humor Thread Respo
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Lovely seeing Palpy getting uncovered by his queen.
-----signature-----
writer and Star Wars fan
FANART [link=http://boards.theforce.net/fan_art/b10020/25793899]fanart[/link]
stories in my bio
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Darth_Leia_6669
Registered:
Apr '03
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Date Posted:
7/21 12:42pm
Subject:
RE: "Life is Pain"~ Palpatine, Amidala ~ Humor~ Anakin's Anger Management Courses Humor Thread Respo
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I am so jealous! I love the Princess Bride, and would have loved to get this quote! But I cannot complain, as you did such a wonderful job with it Palpy busted?! Too funny! Such a classic blunder on his part, but all for the good of the galaxy!
--later--
6669 
-----signature-----
SOTH: When Worlds Collide http://boards.theforce.net/message.asp?topic=28532068&brd=10476 Chapter 17 up 10-8!! Master to Lisbev! Vader for Prez in '08! Check my profile for more stories and art!
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Idrelle_Miocovani
Title: Solar Power loving Scattergories Hostess
Registered:
Feb '05
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Date Posted:
7/21 12:52pm
Subject:
RE: "Life is Pain"~ Palpatine, Amidala ~ Humor~ Anakin's Anger Management Courses Humor Thread Respo
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Classic!
Amidala shook her head at him. “So I was right, huh?” She laughed. “You are so busted.”
HA!
-----signature-----
"He said, 'Don't die under my command, you're enough of a pain without the paperwork.' That was it."
"Tell him, 'Fine, there's no way I'm dying before you do, you morally bankrupt Colonel with a God complex.'"
Padawan of DarthIshtar
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mujapple-juicey
Registered:
Jul '08
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Date Posted:
7/22 7:39am
Subject:
RE: "Life is Pain"~ Palpatine, Amidala ~ Humor~ Anakin's Anger Management Courses Humor Thread Respo
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Porpoise is busted straight off. YEAH!
I can't help but say that Porpoise has problems managing his verbal actions.
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Padawan to Alley_Skywalker If only I could get a new lawn mower... I'd rule I write stories too!  dance!! and shoes!! and baby powder purple halipinos
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