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Topic:
One Of Us (The generations of dead Jedi remind Vader of his Sacrilege. OT.)
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Jedi_Master_Cazz
Registered:
Sep '05
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Date Posted:
7/21 2:52am
Subject:
One Of Us (The generations of dead Jedi remind Vader of his Sacrilege. OT.)
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Title: One Of Us
Author: Jedi_Master_Cazz
Characters: Darth Vader.
Timeframe: Somewhere within the OT, wherever you feel it fits!
Genre: One-shot/Songfic.
Notes: This is a songfic written from Vader's perspective, while he is asleep. The dead Jedi haunt him, reminding him over and over again that he is forever apart from them. I want to thank VaderLVR64 for taking time out from the excitement of the new baby girl to beta this for me! On another note, you might recognize this song from The Lion King 2. 
One Of Us.
~*~
Deception.
Oh yes, there had been deception in those days. Just as there is now. We had all been deceived. By a lie. Just as Kenobi had said. I was deceived, as were the Senate, the people, and the Jedi. But now that Ancient Order condemns me for his deception. I cannot say I blame them. After all, one learns to become indifferent after so long.
Disgrace.
I was theirs, wasn’t I? Their Chosen One, to be honed to perfection. The Jedi Orders Golden Child. Ah, not so now. The black crust that I am twists and turns in sleep once more, and their faces, haunting me with the glow of blue and green sabres, sneer down, down deep into the wells of my coal black lenses.
Evil as plain as the scar on his face.
Heart burned to choking charcoal sits cold and ashen within my decaying body. It no longer beats, unlike what the Medics tell myself and my master. Thousands upon thousands of Jedi from before time began point their accusing fingers down at the bridge of my nose. I cower before them, for once knowing that they are all oh so right.
Deception. An outrage!
Their Outrage.
Disgrace. For shame!
My Shame.
He asked for trouble the moment he came.
Sinister, sneering, picking fights. Strutting around that Ancient Temple. Desecrating it with my mere presence.
Deception. An outrage!
My Outrage!
Disgrace. For shame!
Their Shame!
Born in grief.
Raised in hate.
I was their lost cause from the beginning. “Too late he came,” said they. Too unsightly to be moulded into the perfect Jedi to destroy the perfect Sith. At least Sidious rises to the challenge!
Help us to decide his fate.
Banish me from your shrine forever! Forced to wander the Shadow World alone, even after death. I know this punishment to be true, every step I take, each of my footprints that bruises the planes of energy, even each mechanically forced breath I heave is considered sacrilegious.
Let him run.
Let him live.
I survive. Because the Force wills it. Sidious may think that he may have been the force pinning my life’s beat inside my body. But no. I hear the force every time I sleep, which is rare. “You! I gave you your gift and this is how you would repay me?! You are an abomination!” So, I live. And suffer. Even that yet is to be a small justice for my crimes.
But do not forget, what we cannot forgive.
And no, I will never forget. Do not fear, Jedi. Never before have I cursed my memory that has saved me countless times. What I would do to forget? I never forget.
And he is not one of us,
He has never been part of us,
He is not one of us,
Not our kind.
Apart forever. But I’ve always been so. Separated, not just from the Jedi’s ranks, but from life itself. This Iron Lung itches at my mind and body I fear that I will one day scratch myself to death.
Someone once lied to us.
To us all.
Someone once died for us!
Only now, Jedi, you understand Qui-Gon’s plight.
Now we're not so blind.
For we knew he would do what he's done.
And we know that he'll never be one of us.
I am the granite rock in your river, you flow by, teasing me, trying ever so nauseatingly to move me! Never! I stand here, while your waters eat away at me over the countless aeons. We are ageless. Watch as life passes you by. Hate it!
He is not one of us.
Never.
Deception.
A victim.
Disgrace.
A tool.
Deception.
I was told she died.
Disgrace.
I am Disgrace in not quite human form.
Deception.
You hid my son from me Master?
Fin.
~*~
A/N: It's bare to the bones, I know, but that is purposeful to try and differ from the usual Vader POV's out there. It's also very choppy by design, kind of like a bad, off-putting dream. The last note I sort of just threw in, "Deception. You hid my son from me Master?" I can't even tell weather it's directed at Obi-wan or Sidious, or the force! *Shrug*
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If you say plz instead of Please, I'll say No because it's shorter than Yes.
Proud Padawan to Master VaderLV64!
Preparing for Final Exams. Will be on sporatically for the next few immediate months.
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Valairy_Scot
Registered:
Sep '05
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Date Posted:
7/21 10:20am
Subject:
RE: One Of Us (The generations of dead Jedi remind Vader of his Sacrilege. OT.)
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Wow - very imaginative and well done. I like it!
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http://boards.theforce.net/fan_fiction_resource/b10304/25405090/p3/?52 Prolific Author thread: list & links there. A million wins; a gazillion "also rans" - not bad at all! So very honored. Thank you!
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VaderLVR64
Title: Fan Fic Manager Digging out from Fay
Registered:
Feb '04
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Date Posted:
7/21 11:26am
Subject:
RE: One Of Us (The generations of dead Jedi remind Vader of his Sacrilege. OT.)
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You know how much I like this!  It's powerful, a punch to the gut. Beautifully done! 
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If you have to choose between tears and laughter, remember that laughter burns more calories.
They call me NANA Vader.
At least she doesn't lack confidence...
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earlybird-obi-wan
Registered:
Aug '06
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Date Posted:
7/21 11:34am
Subject:
RE: One Of Us (The generations of dead Jedi remind Vader of his Sacrilege. OT.)
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beautifully done, the essence
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writer and Star Wars fan
FANART [link=http://boards.theforce.net/fan_art/b10020/25793899]fanart[/link]
stories in my bio
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Svebor
Registered:
Nov '05
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Date Posted:
7/21 4:40pm
Subject:
RE: One Of Us (The generations of dead Jedi remind Vader of his Sacrilege. OT.)
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Very cool! And nicely written. 
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Helen_Taft
Registered:
Mar '08
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Date Posted:
7/22 4:58am
Subject:
RE: One Of Us (The generations of dead Jedi remind Vader of his Sacrilege. OT.)
- Date Edited:
7/22 5:01am (1 edits total)
Edited By:
Helen_Taft
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Wow! This is very powerful. I loved the choppy effect. I think it was perfect for the stream of black thoughts that Vader was having, almost as if he's arguing with the spectres haunting him. Dreams *are* chaotic, especially when they are so full of pain and contrast. I love how you mingled his self-hatred and pain with his indifference and defiance.
That last line aimed at Obi-Wan really got me (I'm going with Obi if you don't mind--since Palpatine didn't know the kids had survived either until Luke turned up an adult). There seemed to me to be a plaintive, pained query element to it that was sooooo very different from the rest, but again, oddly right somehow.
Fabulous! Really well done.
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