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Luton_Plunder Registered: Jun '06	Date Posted: 10/25/08 8:03am Subject: Division 29 -Detectify THIS! (CorSec Police Procedural Spoof) - Date Edited: 10/25/08 8:13am (2 edits total) Edited By: Luton_Plunder
	Title: Divison 29 - Detectify THIS Author: Luton_Plunder Characters: OCs Timeframe: Intertrillogy Author Notes: A response to the OC thread challenge about Fruit. Division 29 is a phony Holovid serial that exists within 'The User' series of fics. See bio for links to the stories. The premise here is that Season 3 of the show has a new sponsor - CorellianApple Division 29 Season 3 - Premiere Episode One - Detectify This! Brought to you by CorellianApple! Eat CorellianApples. They'll turn you into a detective, maybe! - Probably not, though. Cast Good Guys • Detective Jach 'Reckless' Reckless - Human Male from Corellia • Detective Sandreh Legs - Human Female from Corellia • Detective Patt Bythebook - Human Male from Alderaan • Officer Allectetrus Don'tspeak - Twi'lek Male from Corellia • Probationary Officer Lucie Wisecrackerry - Human Female from Corellia • Director Frenz 'Scumkicker' Bradle - Human Male from Corellia Bad Guys • Optitron - A cobbled together war droid • Prince Gaspien - A serial killer who uses biological agents • Matriarch Jones - An elderly lady with cybernetic implants that grant her incredible speed and strength Others • Divinity Charity - A holonews Journalist • Ms. Anne Thrope - A life-hating snitch who will rat out anyone, for a price • Captain Courageous and Gorgeous - A self proclaimed super hero vying for the affections of Divinity Charity Previously, On Division 29 Detective Jach Reckless discovered that the man who murdered his wife and child two years ago was actually his best friend, Detective Allan Ironie, who was also his partner on the case. With the help of Detective Sandreh Legs, Ironie was brought to justice, but not before he got a warning away to his crimelord. Director Bradle ordered that Reckless hunt down the crime syndicate involved in the murder. He found them buried deep underneath Coronet, and managed to fight his way to the centre of the lair. When we last left our hero, he was about to have the identity of the mysterious 'Matriarch Jones' revealed to him... Scene One "Oh my Force," Jach Reckless breathed as the old woman appeared before him. She was brittle, but glowed with an all too familiar light that had eluded him since childhood. "Mom?" His mother - Matriarch Jones - smiled evilly back at him. "It took you long enough to get here, Jachy Boy," she said, sweeping her long flowing night gown around her. Jach seethed with a rage that was tempered only by the fact that he had longed to see his mother for twenty years. "Wha..." he began. "How..." he began again. "I mean..." his third false start. "You're dead!" Her frilly pink shoulder pads swivelled to face him with unnerving speed. Shortly afterward, the rest of her body did as well. "That is what you are meant to think!" she cackled, electricity darting between her teeth, illuminating them in such a way that teeth are not meant to be illuminated for they are but enamel-covered bone and not conductive of electricity which in any case might have otherwise electrocuted the owner of the teeth. "Whoa, back up!" Reckless demanded. "I'm starting to think in lengthy sentences. We need to take this slowly." "Don't take too long, Jachy Boy," Mama Reckless said, her eyes protruding and then receding into their metallic sockets. "Or I might just go crazy and kill you. These cybernetic implants of mine are unpredictable you know." Aha! Jach thought. Cybernetic Implants. These might go some way to explaining the sparks coming from her ears. His logic was irrefutable. Some in CorSec would call it infallible. Others still might call it his most attractive quality. He knew these people were wrong however, as it were his looks that were his most attractive quality. "You crazy Mother!" he yelled. "You implanted yourself with cyber enhancements without a permit? That's..." he waited for his pause to hang so delightfully in the air that all those listening couldn't help but feel anticipation for the conclusion to his sentence. "A crime." The gasps of Prince Gaspian were audible even over the steam-driven sound of Matriarch Jones' knee joints. Reckless knew that by eliciting such a gasp from a wanted serial murderer his pause had been effective indeed. "That it is," Matriarch Jones said. "So is ordering your wife and child to be killed in cold blood. I'm not fussy with laws these days - I'm old, and entitled to be cantankerous." "Cantakerous???" Reckless said, adorning his rhetorical question with just enough embellishment to represent three question marks. Enunciating punctuation was something that he was particularly good at. "You're a murderer!" "I'm also your mother, young man," she snapped. "And I will not have you use that tone of voice with me." "Sorry, mom," Reckless said reflexively. "But all the same, you're under arrest." "I think not, Reckless!" Optitron said, making a dramatic entrance from under a pile of rubble. "It is you who are under arrest, by authority of my superior, signed-in-triplicate blasters!" "Optitron!" Jach shouted, wishing he had a third arm with which to reach for another blaster. "You're also supposed to be dead! I killed you myself the last time we faced off, and I killed you decisively." "Your commentary on our previous encounters is quite informative and does not detract from the tension," Optitron instructed everyone in the room on story structure, as was his way. "But now you must make your thrilling escape!" Twelve of the sixteen blaster pistols in Optitron's multi-dextrous left hand began firing while the other hand busied itself activating a series of multi-coloured lightsabers and hurling them at Jack. He dived out of the way and took cover behind a pylon, of which there were several in the room. "Deadly Lightsabers!" Jach cursed. "My weakness!" Matriarch Jones, clutching a white rag, advanced toward her son's hiding place. "Come now, Jachy Boy! You have something on your face! Let me get it off for you," she cried, spitting a sizzling yellow fluid into the rag. Oh no, her saliva is a deadly poison! Jach recalled an earlier briefing on a series of murders in which the victims had been spit-wiped to death. Suddenly it all made sense. He lamented that the spot on his face would have to remain there for the time being. "Hey Reckless!" Prince Gaspian yelled, wielding a grenade of some kind. "I'm reminded of the old expression: 'Give a man a fish and he'll eat for a day. Give a man a lethal gas grenade and he'll never eat again!'" He truly was the prince of one-liners and this more than the toxic gas intimidated Jach. He held his breath as the gas grenade began to leak out a bright green cloud. One of the first things he had learned as a CorSec recruit was how to hold his breath for seven minutes, as was standard procedure. He had that long to find his way out of here. Seven Minutes. The clock was ticking! /\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/ Scene Two Detective Sandreh Legs slammed her calves on her desk in rage. "Dammit!" she yelled, "Jach is out there! We have to go in and rescue him!" Probationary Officer Lucie Wisecrackerry rolled her eyes. "Judging by your skirt, I'd say it's your hemline that needs rescuing." Detective Patt Bythebook looked pensive. "We haven't got a warrant, Detective Legs! Jach was incredibly reckless to do what he did. Sometimes you have to draw the line and force him to face up to himself." Sandreh glared daggers at Patt. "I don't care what you say, I love...I mean...I think he's neat!" Unrequited sexual tension was like a fourth character in the room. Officer Wisecrackerry snorted. "You wouldn't think he was neat if you'd seen his desk, am I right?" she threw it out there but was denied her props. "There's only one person who can help him now," a new voice said. For a moment, everyone thought that Unrequited Sexual Tension had finally become corporeal and developed an opinion. It was, however, merely Director Scumkicker Bradle. They all knew who he was talking about. "Hopefully," Legs said, "He's already on the way." /\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/ Scene Three Officer Allecetrus Don'tspeak slammed Ms. Anne Thrope against a wall without a word. She groaned under the weight of his grip. "Hey! What's the big idea! I hate it when people do that. In fact I hate people in general." Don'tspeak didn't say anything. Instead he held up a handful of credit chits and pointed to the image of Matriarch Jones that he had earlier stuck to his forehead. Years of being mute had allowed him to streamline these interrogations so that his target could comply more easily. "Oh, her. I hate her." Don'tspeak merely waited for her to continue. "She lives in an underground bunker very close to here. But good luck getting in. It'd take someone incredibly reckless to get in there. Or someone very, very courageous. And I don't know anyone like that - I hate those kinds of people." Allectetrus dropped her and pulled out his comlink. He waited for the scene to move on before he began to communicate with the person on the other end to save the need to explain how a mute would go about having a comlink conversation. /\/\/\/\/\/\//\//\/\/\/\/\/\/ Commercial Break <int. DIVISION 29 HEADQUARTERS> JACH RECKLESS: (angry) I can't concentrate without a healthy snack! In the background a CRIMINAL raises a gun at Jach's head. Foreground, Jach picks up a CorellianApple. JACH RECKLESS: (Happy Now!) Luckily I have a CorellianApple to see me through the day! Jach eats the apple. Cut to: Scene of criminal about to pull the trigger. Cut back to: Jach, sensing something is wrong, turns and hurls the apple right into the criminal's face. It explodes in a glorious haze of attractive, slow-motion water droplets. JACH RECKLESS: CorellianApples. For taking down gun-wielding criminals, there's nothing better. Try it yourself, kids! Cut to Graphic, CorellianApple logo. VOICE OVER: (Spoken VERY quickly) CorellianApple does not recommend trying it yourself. /\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\///\/\/\/ Scene Four "Not long to go now, Jach!" Matriarch Jones cried. "You CorSec officers can only hold your breath seven minutes, and three have already passed!" Any audience members who had just begun watching would now be fully briefed on the situation, Jach knew. This was comforting in the face of death. "And so ends the final chapter of Detective Jach "Reckless" Reckless," Optitron said from beyond the green cloud. "Unless something very unexpected happens shortly, which it probably wont as there is no dramatic irony going on at the moment." "Sticks and stones may break his bones," Prince Gaspian cackled, "But gas will liquefy his innards!" If his verbal barbs don't finish me first! Jach thought furiously. He needed a miracle. He needed... "Hold right there, all of you!" A new voice boomed through the room. "Or I can't be held responsible for my actions!" Jach recognised the voice immediately and nearly breathed in sharply, though this would have been fatal. It was the miracle he'd been waiting for. "Captain Courageous and Gorgeous!" Prince Gaspian yelled. "Damn you! Everyone knows that you are the only person on all of Corellia who is immune to poisonous gas!" The sounds of his retreating footsteps filled the cavernous underground room. "Nooo!" Optitron yelled. "How can this be? My sensors aren't reading any dramatic irony. I... I..." The droid exploded in a haze of self-doubt and failure. Optitron was, Jach knew, completely dead for sure this time. He would never appear in any further episodes. Ever. Not even with all the dramatic irony that was flooding around the room could the droid be resurrected and Jach was relieved. "And now for you, Matriarch Jones," Captain Courageous and Gorgeous said, advancing on the incredible mechanoid senior citizen. "You'll rue the day that you ever crossed Captain Courageous and Gorgeous! For I am about to end your miserable life!" Jach ran from the green cloud with his hands above his head. "Noooo!" he shouted. "She's my mother!" "What???" Captain Courageous and Gorgeous asked. Deciphering how much punctuation other people were using was another especially honed talent of Jach's. "She's my mother!" he interposed himself and stood firm. "Fool!" The Captain exclaimed. "She's lying! And in the time that you spent trying to protect her, she has crafted her escape!" Jach turned just in time to see her hulking frame sprout rocket jets and lift off. He paused for a moment to consider how ridiculous it was that her character would suddenly have the power of flight when it had been established in at least three prior episodes that she probably didn't, but let it slide. He could retcon that later. "Well, I guess there's only one thing for it," Captain Courageous and Gorgeous said. "Agreed," Detective Reckless nodded. "Let's go have a CorellianApple," the said together. /\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/ Scene Five Everyone went to the Fruit Barn instead of the bar that night and crowded around the holoprojector. "Repeating that story," Divinity Charity, the local midday newsreader, said, "Matriarch Jones has eluded capture yet again, but not for want of trying by Detective Jach Reckless and the ever-wonderful Captain Courageous and Gorgeous." "Thanks, sweetcakes," Captain Courageous said from behind his CorellianApple. "You're welcome, Hot Stuff," she winked at him before turning the volume back up on the holoprojector and watching the evening news. Lucie Wisecrackerry rolled her eyes. "Breaking news: your flirting is obvious!" Director Bradle piped up from the corner of the room. "Well, everyone - a successful day at the office. Matriarch Jones may have eluded us this time, but she can't run forever." Sandreh Legs applauded. "And it's all thanks to Jach," she said, nudging him. "Don't applaud me," Jach said moodily into his CorellianApple. "She got away, but she left a piece of herself behind. And I'm going to use it to destroy her." He fished the piece out of his pocket. It was a thermal detonator that had fallen from a bandolier on her shoulder. Patt Bythebook spat out his piece of CorellianApple. "I hope you'll remember to clear the use of high explosives with high command!" Everyone laughed a hearty and well deserved laugh. That Patt! Always so by the book. Sandreh leaned in close to Jach and whispered to him. "You're my captain courageous and gorgeous," she said. "Pardon?" Jach asked, having not heard her over the patronage. She sighed. "I said, 'you're neat, Jach.'" On the bar stool next to them, Unrequited Sexual Tension settled in for a long night. -----signature----- The Essential Guide to OCs. Say No to Mary. http://boards.theforce.net/fan_fiction_resource/b10304/25562370/p1
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NYCitygurl Title: Manager of SFFBC, C&G, NSWFF, and Icons Registered: Jul '02	Date Posted: 10/25/08 8:34am Subject: RE: Division 29 -Detectify THIS! (CorSec Police Procedural Spoof)
	This is hilarious!! -----signature----- I agree with RJ Officially Idri's Muse "Hat. We thought of authentic Native American headdress before we thought of hat."
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frodogenic1 Registered: Apr '08	Date Posted: 10/25/08 9:27am Subject: RE: Division 29 -Detectify THIS! (CorSec Police Procedural Spoof)
	Good grief, that was hilarious. I was completely seeing that guy from CSI-Miami the entire time. Freaking hysterical.
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amidalachick Registered: Aug '03	Date Posted: 10/25/08 10:12am Subject: RE: Division 29 -Detectify THIS! (CorSec Police Procedural Spoof)
	Hilarious fic! The characters, the dialogue, the narrative, the commercial break...it's all great. Oh no, her saliva is a deadly poison! Jach recalled an earlier briefing on a series of murders in which the victims had been spit-wiped to death. Suddenly it all made sense. He lamented that the spot on his face would have to remain there for the time being. The things heroes have to endure, eh? "Hey Reckless!" Prince Gaspian yelled, wielding a grenade of some kind. "I'm reminded of the old expression: 'Give a man a fish and he'll eat for a day. Give a man a lethal gas grenade and he'll never eat again!'" *** "Sticks and stones may break his bones," Prince Gaspian cackled, "But gas will liquefy his innards!" I like his versions of these sayings! -----signature----- "So I can open my own can of pudding, can I? Shows what you know, Marge!"
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earlybird-obi-wan Registered: Aug '06	Date Posted: 10/26/08 12:50am Subject: RE: Division 29 -Detectify THIS! (CorSec Police Procedural Spoof)
	Hilarious and had me after an early wake up Great response to the challenge. -----signature----- writer and Star Wars fan FANART [link=http://boards.theforce.net/fan_art/b10020/25793899]fanart[/link] stories in my bio
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The_Face Title: Ex-Manager Registered: Feb '03	Date Posted: 11/11/08 9:27am Subject: RE: Division 29 -Detectify THIS! (CorSec Police Procedural Spoof) - Date Edited: 11/11/08 9:34am (1 edits total) Edited By: The_Face
	Division 29!! Yessss His logic was irrefutable. Some in CorSec would call it infallible. Others still might call it his most attractive quality. He knew these people were wrong however, as it were his looks that were his most attractive quality. This. This is beautiful. Your commentary on our previous encounters is quite informative and does not detract from the tension Don'tspeak didn't say anything. Instead he held up a handful of credit chits and pointed to the image of Matriarch Jones that he had earlier stuck to his forehead. What a visual. Great episode, Futon! Hilarious stuff. -----signature----- "Writing is a socially acceptable form of schizophrenia." - E.L. Doctorow
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_ThatJediScum_ Registered: Jul '05	Date Posted: 11/11/08 12:56pm Subject: RE: Division 29 -Detectify THIS! (CorSec Police Procedural Spoof)
	Officer Allecetrus Don'tspeak slammed Ms. Anne Thrope against a wall without a word. She groaned under the weight of his grip. "Hey! What's the big idea! I hate it when people do that. In fact I hate people in general." Don'tspeak didn't say anything. Instead he held up a handful of credit chits and pointed to the image of Matriarch Jones that he had earlier stuck to his forehead. Years of being mute had allowed him to streamline these interrogations so that his target could comply more easily. This whole piece was absolutely hilarious. But the above has to be my favorite part. Wonderful. bran
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Trika_Kenobi Registered: Nov '99	Date Posted: 11/11/08 1:10pm Subject: RE: Division 29 -Detectify THIS! (CorSec Police Procedural Spoof)
	OMG. Hai, Futon! First-time reader of your work here, and I'm in absolute stitches at this point. This was hilariously awesome! Oh no, her saliva is a deadly poison! Jach recalled an earlier briefing on a series of murders in which the victims had been spit-wiped to death. He waited for the scene to move on before he began to communicate with the person on the other end to save the need to explain how a mute would go about having a comlink conversation. He paused for a moment to consider how ridiculous it was that her character would suddenly have the power of flight when it had been established in at least three prior episodes that she probably didn't, but let it slide. He could retcon that later. That Patt! Always so by the book. On the bar stool next to them, Unrequited Sexual Tension settled in for a long night. Great stuff! Awesome, awesome wit and creativity! -----signature----- My Uncle Sam sends me places... the "going OCONUS lol" is here! Current Location: Iraq Don't bother running. You won't get far enough. http://www.TalonIntelligenceSquadron.com
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Forcefire Registered: Jul '00	Date Posted: 11/14/08 1:45pm Subject: RE: Division 29 -Detectify THIS! (CorSec Police Procedural Spoof)
	Okay, this is a pop-top can of fun. I particularly like the tone of the story. If you made me pick a favorite part? "Repeating that story," Divinity Charity, the local midday newsreader, said, "Matriarch Jones has eluded capture yet again, but not for want of trying by Detective Jach Reckless and the ever-wonderful Captain Courageous and Gorgeous." "Thanks, sweetcakes," Captain Courageous said from behind his CorellianApple. "You're welcome, Hot Stuff," she winked at him before turning the volume back up on the holoprojector and watching the evening news. Great turn. One question, though. Is there a theme song? Every great show needs a great theme song. -----signature----- "Dear Diary, today I was pompous and my sister was crazy. Today we were kidnapped by hillfolk, never to be seen again. It was the best day ever." Jayne Cobb, the Hero of Canton
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SoA Registered: Apr '08	Date Posted: 11/20/08 10:44am Subject: RE: Division 29 -Detectify THIS! (CorSec Police Procedural Spoof)
	Oh man, this was so much fun. The over-the-top random tangents and unnecessary but wonderful descriptions were fabulous. Aha! Jach thought. Cybernetic Implants. These might go some way to explaining the sparks coming from her ears. His logic was irrefutable. Some in CorSec would call it infallible. Others still might call it his most attractive quality. He knew these people were wrong however, as it were his looks that were his most attractive quality. Great descriptive tangent. -----signature----- Padawan to Commander-DWH Under the Shadow of the Builders- http://boards.theforce.net/before_the_saga/b10475/29386724/p1/ Fanfiction Web Site- http://faraway.toweroftime.com SoA's India Blog- http://jenna-song.blogspot.com
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Commander-DWH Title: Shiny Fan Fiction Manager Registered: Nov '03	Date Posted: 11/30/08 9:27pm Subject: RE: Division 29 -Detectify THIS! (CorSec Police Procedural Spoof)
	Futon, why haven't I read more of your stuff? Clearly, I am a slacker. This was fabulously fun and over-the-top in a way that hits my funny bone just right. Great work, and an excellent entry to the challenge! -----signature----- Complements (KOTOR)- http://boards.theforce.net/before_the_saga/b10475/21177927/ Luminosity- http://boards.theforce.net/before_the_saga/b10475/27900517/ Barefoot hippie in the OC revolution Master of the lovely and talented SoA
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Thumper09 Registered: Dec '01	Date Posted: 11/30/08 9:43pm Subject: RE: Division 29 -Detectify THIS! (CorSec Police Procedural Spoof)
	Sorry I'm so late to the party, LP. I was laughing way too hard while reading this, and I don't know if I'll ever be able to watch the "Luke, I am your father" scene in ESB again without the beginning of this story coming to mind. But Vader didn't even have rocket jets; he could learn a thing or two from Matriarch Jones. I loved the "enunciating punctuation" skill and also "He truly was the prince of one-liners and this more than the toxic gas intimidated Jach." There were a bunch of other quotes I thought were great, too. I can totally see now how Despot could get hooked on this show. Great job! -----signature----- "Like anything worth writing, it came inexplicably and without method." -Karen Eiffel, Stranger Than Fiction "Adamantine"--Rebel OC vig http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/30390799 "That's 'stupid plan, sir,' Lieutenant." -Wedge
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furrylittlebantha Registered: Dec '05	Date Posted: 12/1/08 2:32pm Subject: RE: Division 29 -Detectify THIS! (CorSec Police Procedural Spoof)
	I remember reading this when it was first posted and laughing till tears came to my eyes. The second read through was equally moistly hilarious. I watched quite a bit of television over Thanksgiving break, having nothing else to do (well, that's a lie, but 'nothing' sounded better at the time than 'oodles of deadly important homework'), and it's truly frightening how close most tv is to your creation here. And funny. very, very funny. -----signature----- Master of tjace and bi0nic. In mourning for the one year, nine months, and five days it has been since The Souls of Demons was updated. sob
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Gabri_Jade Title: Fan Fiction Archive Editor Emeritus Registered: Nov '02	Date Posted: 12/1/08 7:12pm Subject: RE: Division 29 -Detectify THIS! (CorSec Police Procedural Spoof)
	So beautiful. So very beautiful. I could quote half the story as my favorite parts - I mean, it's simply a brilliant parody. The swiveling frilly pink shoulderpads have lodged themselves as a truly disturbing image in my mind, as has Matriarch Jones trying to spit-wipe Jach's face. (I'm sometimes frightened by the changes that women seem to undergo upon having children. My father never tried to wipe my face with his own spit, for which I am eternally grateful. Mothers. ) Jach's enunciation of punctuation made me giggle. The flood of dramatic irony and the blatant sponsership was wonderful. But, bar none, this was my favorite part: On the bar stool next to them, Unrequited Sexual Tension settled in for a long night. Best final line EVER. Fantastic stuff. -----signature----- Evil Twin of LadyPadme This concept of "wuv" confuses and infuriates us! - Futurama All I can do is be me. Whoever that is. - Bob Dylan Serendipity (Leia-Mara vig) - http://boards.theforce.net/b/b1/30178069 !!11!1eleventy
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Luton_Plunder Registered: Jun '06	Date Posted: 12/2/08 3:41am Subject: RE: Division 29 -Detectify THIS! (CorSec Police Procedural Spoof)
	Oh whoops! Appears I forgot to come back and do the author replies as they happened! Agh, stupid real life NYCitygurl - Glad you liked it Frodogenic - Haha, while I wasn't specifically lampooning CSI Miami, it seems that you don't have to try very hard to emulate that show's formula Amidalachick - Thanks! Prince Gaspian's take on old phrases was actually one of the most difficult bits I had to find suitable old sayings and somehow get a gas grenade reference in there. I'm pleased with the results Earlybird - Thanks! I'm very happy that it elicited an early morning laugh - these are the hardest to get Face - I'm glad you liked it! That segment about his looks being his most attractive quality is probably my favourite part of the story. Well actually, the 'Deadly Lightsabers! My weakness!' line is my personal favourite bit, but that's a close second JediScum - I'm glad you liked it! The picture on the forehead struck me as entirely sensible at the time, haha. Trika - Hai yourself! Glad you liked the story You flatter me with your praise. Forcefire - I'm very glad you picked that part as I was worried that it was not noticeable! And look what you've done, now you've gone and made me write a themesong. Division Twenty Nine Themesong (To the tune of 'Start Me Up' by the Rolling Stones) Policin' Stuff! Ahhhh policin' stuff, it never stops! But we're really tough! Ahhhh we're really tough 'cause we are cops! <Chorus> Division Twenty-niiiiiine! We're gonna solve some criiiiiime! Just in the nick of tiiiiiime! We'll crack the case at double speed, There's more heroes here than you'll ever neeeeeeeed! Corny? Yes. Fitting? I think so SoA - Thanks for reading! I'm glad you liked the descriptive tangents, I discovered that they're awesome fun to write DWH - Fabulously Fun in an Over-the-top way! If Division 29 were ever to be released on DVD I would want this blurb somewhere on the cover in a great big red star. Thanks for reading Thumper - Haha! Despot is hooked on the show - as of yet I can't decide whether it's supposed to a comedy in-universe or a show that is inadvertently hilarious for how bad it is. I'm erring on the latter, given Despot is often oblivious to things that others can plainly see Oh, and sorry for ruining ESB Thanks for reading! furrylittlebantha - Hey! Thanks for reading! And it's good to hear that I'm striking a satirical blow against non-ratings television. I hope TV executives read this and commence the shaking in their boots. I've got their number, oh yes. Gabri - Thanks for reading!! And who, best last line ever?? I'm thrilled :p haha. Thanks again to all! There's a new challenge out. Perhaps I'll write the second episode of Division 29 as a response to it! Until then, keep on detectifying! -----signature----- The Essential Guide to OCs. Say No to Mary. http://boards.theforce.net/fan_fiction_resource/b10304/25562370/p1
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frodogenic1 Registered: Apr '08	Date Posted: 12/2/08 6:37pm Subject: RE: Division 29 -Detectify THIS! (CorSec Police Procedural Spoof)
	Oh, PLEASE write another episode. This little number was just as funny the second time around. I love Jach. He might just be my favorite OC ever. Plus, I really want to see how Optitron could be resurrected (again)...
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