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Author	Topic: Hellbound to Redemption (title change) vignettes leading up to "You'll Like Me When I'm Dead"
Daenarrah Registered: Nov '05	Date Posted: 1/15 7:48am Subject: Hellbound to Redemption (title change) vignettes leading up to "You'll Like Me When I'm Dead" - Date Edited: 2/21 10:40pm (2 edits total) Edited By: Daenarrah
	This is now going to be a collection of vignettes leading up to You'll Like Me when I'm Dead. Summary: Redemption or revenge. They’re the same thing to Padmé. And none of the people putting her on its path will be able to tell her differently. Characters: Padmé, Max, Vader, Bail, and others ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Title: Proposition Author: Daenarrah Characters: Padmé, Max (OC) Genre: Drama Era: Post RotS AU Summary: An unexpected offer, from an unexpected source.... Notes: This is a vig that's a precursor to the Epic Dark Drama fic You'll Like Me When I'm Dead I absolutely love the OC Jade created for our fic. He and Padmé have an interesting history so we thought it would be fun to show some of it. This is the first in a short series of vignettes that fit in with You'll Like Me When I'm Dead. I'll be writing them as my class schedule allows. We hope you enjoy this. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Max didn’t quite know how it happened that he ended up in his current situation. One minute he was on his way to check in for another mind-numbing shift of siphoning off funds from the high level Coruscant accounts from the Empire for the Alliance. The next he was sitting in the pilot’s seat of a light freighter, had a blaster pointed at his back, and being ordered to override security codes so he could fly the newly commandeered ship off and away from the base he had called home for the past several months. He didn’t mind leaving the base; no one there appreciated his slicing skills and he was fed up with it. He had given thought many time to leaving on his own and finding a more lucrative job. But the fact he was being forced to do so, and by blaster point, wasn’t quite how he pictured things panning out. He looked up when the slip of a woman who had forced his hand in his impromptu and unexpected departure sat down in the co-pilot’s seat. Padmé Naberrie, formerly Padmé Amidala, Senator of Naboo, watched him carefully, her sharp eyes taking in every move he made; her blaster still raised and pointed at him. Max knew what she wanted – she had made that crystal clear. But then he didn’t exactly enjoy looking down the business end of a blaster - and he had to act fast to get past the security measures and get them out of there. She wasn’t going to shoot him – something told him that wasn’t part of her agenda – but he could sense a desperation that told him she had to get as far away from this place as possible. And for some reason she decided he was going to be the one to help her do that. “Will you hurry up,” Padmé snapped at him, clearly agitated. “I heard you’re the best slicer on this Force-forsaken place but I’m beginning to wonder if it’s all a bunch of hype.” Max stopped what he was doing and turned to glare at her. “It’s not exactly easy work when I have a kriffin’ blaster pointed in my face.” Damn that she had that thing pointed at him. He didn’t like being insulted. And for some reason her little jab really stung. Padmé narrowed her eyes at him. “I’m simply making sure you don’t do anything foolish like alert Bail or Mon to what’s happening here.” “Now why would I do something like that?” And Max had a point. He wasn’t very fond of the two senators, especially Senator Organa. He had approached the man on more than one occasion about letting him put his slicing skills to better use, in areas other than siphoning off funds, but every time he had been refused. He explained he had the skill and knowledge to help the fledgling Alliance develop the database they needed to get the upper hand with the Empire but he was routinely dismissed, told it wasn’t necessary. He even had gone so far as to manage to slice into Imperial databanks so the Alliance could track the movements of Darth Vader and other Imperial agents undetected. He was reprimanded for it when he showed it to Senator Organa. He thought it would give them an advantage; the senator said it was reckless. It was hard after that for him to respect somebody who didn’t respect or appreciate him either. And as for Padmé. He didn’t know the strife that was present between her and Senator’s Organa and Mothma but he knew she had no love for them either. He’d heard them fighting a few times, and he remembered the first time he had ever encountered the former senator and caught a glimpse of the conflict that went on between the three. He was on his way to have another talk with Senator Organa about putting him to work in a more productive environment. He was only a few feet away from the conference room he had been told the senator was in. As he approached he heard a woman say in an angry voice, “I’ll never forgive you for this.” He was barely given a moment to think about what he had heard when the female the voice belonged to came charging out of the room and collided with him. She walked with such force she almost knocked him down. Quite the feat since he was almost six feet tall and she didn’t quite come up to his chin. He was about to yell at her to watch where she was going but the look on her face stopped him. She was angry and distraught and he could tell she was trying to keep from crying. He ended up apologizing for being in her way. She told him it was okay, but it was what she said next that was something unexpected. She had asked him if he was going to talk to Senator Organa. He told her yes and she said bitterly, “Don’t bother. You won’t get what you want, no matter how many times you ask for it and know you deserve it.” She then turned and walked away. Max knew she was right; like all the times before Senator Organa had denied him his request for a different, more suitable task. But there was something in the way she said what she did that stayed with him for weeks afterwards. There was some kind of underlying message that he had been made privy to. Some kind of friction between Padmé Naberrie and Senator’s Organa and Mothma, he just didn’t know what it was. Looking at Padmé now, he still didn’t. All he knew was she wanted off the base. He’d be happy to oblige her; he just didn’t like a blaster being waved in his face. Padmé motioned said blaster towards the controls and said tightly, “Just get this thing out of here.” “All right.” Max went back to what he was doing and had the ship’s security system over ridden in no time. He had already taken care of the shields surrounding the hangar bay’s external entrance. That was the first thing Padmé had him do while she figured out which ship she was going to take. The ship began to lift from the landing pad and Padmé asked, “You’re sure you got everything?” “Yes,” Max said trying not to be short with her but one insult was enough. He didn’t like getting another. “I’m not going to do something stupid while I have a blaster aimed at my head.” Padmé chuckled. “You’re a smart man.” “So I’ve been told,” Max replied. The freighter then accelerated and shot a clear path out of the hangar. They flew past the shields undetected and were soon cruising through space. Out of the corner of his eye Max saw Padmé smile. The first one he had ever seen on her. For weeks after their first encounter he kept seeing Padmé all over the base. He soon came to know who she was and, quite frankly, was surprised to find out it was her. He had seen her funeral on the HoloNet seven months beforehand. Yet, here she was alive and well on the fledgling Alliance’s hidden base. He learned that she too was hiding. He didn’t know why and no answers were forthcoming. The only thing he found out was she had woken from a six month coma caused by some kind of trauma and she was now very unhappy with Senator’s Organa and Mothma for some reason. He found this odd considering they were friends and colleagues of hers. Or rather former friends and colleagues as he eventually learned. Every time he and Padmé saw each other for the month after that they acknowledged the other’s presence with a nod or occasional hello. And there was always a look in Padmé’s eyes, one that said she knew and understood what he felt. And to a certain degree he suspected she did. Both were being denied something they wanted. But he could see that whatever it was Padmé was being denied was tearing her up inside while his was just frustrating the hell out of him. Unfortunately, their little run-ins never went beyond that. He remembered, though, he had never seen her smile. Now he had and it was one of the most beautiful things he had ever seen. “What are you looking at?” Padmé’s words snapped him back to reality and he realized he had been staring at her. “Nothing,” he said turning his attention back to the controls. Padmé watched him a little bit before turning her attention to Threepio who was standing towards the back part of the cockpit. “Threepio, set coordinates and get ready for hyperspace.” Threepio was about so ask her something when Max cut him off. “What!?” he said sharply, looking at her incredulously now. Padmé gave him a cool gaze, the blaster still pointed at him, and said in a serious tone. “If you think I’m going to travel along at this leisurely pace and wait for the Alliance to find us you’re wrong. We’re getting out of here and as far away as possible. And you’re coming along for the ride.” Max’s gaze flicked a few times between the end of the blaster and Padmé’s eyes. Letting out a disgruntled groan, he looked away from her and out the cockpit’s viewport. As much as he wanted off the base too, he didn’t want it to go quite like this. Still, being at the controls of a sliced and diced freighter was more fun than siphoning Imperial funds. And as annoyed as he might have been by Padmé’s attitude and tactics he had to admit this was the most excitement he’d had in a very long time. Hijacking a light freighter with a beautiful woman at his side really wasn’t a bad thing. He just had to get her to put the blaster down and everything would be all right. Finally given the chance Threepio asked, “Mistress Padmé, where should I set the coordinates for?” She thought a moment then answered with a shrug of her shoulders. “I don’t know Threepio, and I really don’t care. Anywhere is better than being around here. You decide.” “Me?” came the startled reply. “Why not?” Padmé shrugged her shoulders again and looked back at the protocol droid. “I trust you. You’re the only one I do,” she mumbled the last part, earning a quick glance from Max. “Pick a place, any star system.” It was silent in the cockpit a while before Threepio spoke. “Are you sure? I’m not very good at these things.” “Just pick a place,” Padmé said, trying to keep the irritation out of her voice. “If you insist.” Not long afterwards coordinates were set and with a final okay from Threepio, Padmé pushed down the lever, engaged the hyperdrive thrusters and sent the freighter hurtling through hyperspace. ~~~~~ Four hours later She had done it. She was finally away from the fledgling Alliance and its lying, two-faced, back-stabbing leaders she had once called her friends. She couldn’t stay in a place where those in a position of authority would willingly and deliberately keep the whereabouts of her children from her. It showed her that power, in any form and in anyone’s hands, is corrupt. ‘Not as corrupt as the Empire,’ but the Alliance was in its own way, as far as Padmé was concerned. She was just happy to be away from them. But now she had to figure out what she was going to do about her additional cargo. She had no idea what compelled her to take Max with her and at blaster-point no less. She knew he was unhappy working for the Alliance and she had heard he’d been denied – repeatedly - the chance to put his exceptional slicing skills to better use. It had become common knowledge that he was the best slicer on the base and the mind-numbing task he was doing was far below what he was capable off. He wanted to do more but couldn’t. He wasn’t given the opportunity. She knew that feeling and felt like she had found a kindred spirit in him, especially after their first run-in outside the conference room Bail was located in. Padmé remembered that day very well. She had tried once again, and failed, to get Bail to tell her where her children were. The results were always the same: they were safe and well loved and that was all she needed to know. No amount of arguing and near begging swayed Bail from his answer – her children were safely hidden and it was best she not know where. With the exception of one other time, Padmé hadn’t felt so deeply and bitterly betrayed in her life. These were friends, colleagues, co-founding members of the Delegation of 2000. People she thought she could trust. She found out she couldn’t and it hurt like hell. Storming out of the conference room, she ran right into Max. She remembered telling him to be careful, that Bail won’t give him what he wanted. And sure enough, she was right. She understood him after that, understood him perfectly well. And every time she saw him after that first encounter she could see how unhappy he was. How he wanted to be doing something else, be anywhere other than the Alliance’s hidden base. Padmé was pretty sure that was what pushed her to force him to come with. He was as unhappy as she was, why not get them both off the base and start a new life somewhere else. That didn’t necessarily mean start it together, but start a new one none the less. Now that she was out here in hyperspace she had no idea what to do with him. Maybe she could somehow put his slicing skills to work, and in a way he’d appreciate. She had an idea of what she wanted to do. Max’s skills would definitely come in handy. She wondered if she could get him to stay and help out. She wondered if he’d want to or be even willing after her treatment of him. She’d have to approach him and find out. Padmé was so lost in her thoughts that she didn’t hear Max enter the ship’s lounge. “I’d ask if I could sit down but-” he nodded towards her blaster resting on the table “-I really don’t want that blaster in my face again.” Looking up at him, she gave him a smirk and reached for her weapon. “Then you won’t have it,” she said, holstering it. “You haven’t given me any reason not to trust you, Max; don’t change that.” He chuckled at the fact she knew his name and used it so casually. Sitting down, he sensed he could speak freely with her, despite the circumstances that brought them together. “Meanwhile you, on the other hand, have given me no reason to trust you. How do I know you won’t kill me?” Padmé laughed slightly and shook her head. “Because that’s not my style.” “But kidnapping people at blaster-point is.” As serious as he tried to make the accusation sound, Max couldn’t help the little gleam in his eyes. Padmé noticed this and leaned forward. “I didn’t kidnap you and you know it. You wanted off that base as badly as I did.” He knew she was right and his hands came up in a placating gesture. “All right, all right. Yes, you’re right. I wanted away from that place as badly as you did. But stang, did you have to pull a blaster on me? I would have gone with. All you had to do was ask.” Padmé shook her head, giving him a serious look. “I didn’t know that. It’s not like we talked to each other on base. An occasional nod here and there doesn’t equate to a full-blown conversation.” She leaned back in her chair, shrugging her shoulders. “I couldn’t take any chances even if I knew without a doubt that you wanted to leave. I didn’t want to risk Bail or Mon or anybody trying to stop me.” Max nodded his understanding and glanced around the small lounge before looking back at Padmé. What she had just said peaked his curiosity and he had to ask, “What’d they do to make you so mad at them?” This question took Padmé completely by surprise and her entire body stiffened. “I don’t want to talk about it,” she said quickly, then shot him a quick glare. “Besides, it’s none of your business.” “Sorry I asked,” Max replied grudgingly. “It’s just you seemed to know why I wanted off the base. You did say you had heard I was the best slicer there. So I can assume you know I wasn’t happy with what I was doing?” “I know,” Padmé said with a reluctant nod. She knew where Max was going with this. “So, the least you can do is tell me what your complaint with Organa and Mothma is. Or will I get a blaster in my face for asking?” Padmé looked Max square in the eyes and let out a little sigh, releasing some of her uncertainty with it. Max did have a right to know what she was angry about. She, after all did know what his problem was. And something told her she could trust him. She didn’t know what it was or why since she barely knew him. The thing was her issue with her former colleagues was too painful for her to talk about. At least in the way she assumed Max wanted to. But she figured at least she had to tell him something. Taking a deep breath, she answered. “Bail and Mon took something very valuable and precious away from me, and they won’t give it back.” Max nodded his head, taking in what Padmé said. She then added. “Please don’t ask me to tell you any more. I can’t.” Padmé’s voice cracked slightly on the last two words and when Max looked at her he noticed the same distraught look he had seen on her face the first time he had run into her. “I’m sorry; I didn’t mean to upset you.” “Thanks,” Padmé said, trying to gain back her composure. At that moment the holovid projector that had been playing undetected in the background suddenly grew in volume. Knowing it was a holo broadcast on the latest news on the Empire, both Padmé and Max turned to watch it. The image that appeared on the screen made Padmé’s chest tighten and her heart break into a thousand little pieces. She felt her blood run cold and pain swelled up inside her causing every inch of her body to tremble and ache internally. A lump formed in her throat that became hard to swallow. The pain went away quickly; she fiercely squashed it down and allowed anger and rage to grow in its place. She completely forgot Max was sitting with her as her anger zeroed in on the figure parading before her on the screen. It was his words that brought her back. “It’s hard to believe the ‘Hero With No Fear’ is now running around striking fear into every planet and star system in the galaxy.” He then let out a deep sigh and shook his head. “What happened to the guy?” Padmé, who had looked at Max, turned her attention back to the HoloNet. She knew what happened. Oh yes, she knew all too well what happened and it clawed at her heart and soul every day. Unbidden, her thoughts traveled back to what had once been a better and happier time in her life. To when she loved with such a passion and intensity that she sometimes felt she would drown from it. Memories unwanted flooded her mind’s eye: images of Anakin and the way he would look at her when they were alone, the smile or playful smirk that would adorn his face and her knowing it was only for her, the passion and tenderness of his touch when he’d make love to her. The promise he made that he’d never let anything hurt her. Ruthlessly, she forced away the images of her time with Anakin. That time was no more. It was all gone now. Everything she once loved and held so dearly had been taken away from her, destroyed by the wave of a lightsaber. And it had all been done by the hand of the man who once said he loved her more than anything in the galaxy. The man who now terrorized that same galaxy as Darth Vader. Even Padmé’s life had become forfeit. She may be alive and breathing but she felt empty and dead inside. The life that she once knew and cherished was never to be hers again. The children she bore may never find their way into her arms someday. And it was all because of him. And the promise he made her. How easily he broke it – and her heart and soul in the process. He had to pay. He had to pay for all he had cost her, all she had lost, for how he betrayed her. He had to pay for the sins he committed in her name. She knew all to well that’s what he had done. She remembered the conversation on Mustafar and how it had horrified her. Now the reality of it made her sick to her stomach and placed a weight on her shoulders she couldn’t get rid of. Closing her eyes and taking a deep breath, Padmé steeled her resolve. She wasn’t going to let what her husband had become continue to destroy her life. She was going to do something about it. The task she had in mind was only in the planning stages but she knew it was something that had to be done. For herself, for her children, for the galaxy. She had heard how Max had sliced into Imperial databanks and was able to track the movements of Darth Vader. Why Bail didn’t run with this advantage was something Padmé never understood. But then there was a lot of what the Alliance did that Padmé didn’t understand. What was their loss was her gain now and she’d be a fool not to utilize it, provided Max was willing. Images of Darth Vader still played across the HoloNet. Padmé set her mind with grim determination. Turning to Max she said calmly, “I have a business proposition for you.” -----signature----- You'll Like Me When I'm Dead ~ V/P Dark Drama/Dark Romance - http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/29236355 Hellbound to Redemption - http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/29688961/r29808732/
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Jade_Max Registered: Jun '02	Date Posted: 1/15 6:50pm Subject: RE: Proposition ~ A Padmé & Max vignette; precursor to "You'll Like Me When I'm Dead"
	I know I said this before, but it bears saying again. I -love- how you have Max characterized - and Padmé's desperation and anguish are just so real. this is a fabulous "prequel" to "You'll Like Me When I'm Dead"! Awesome job, my friend... just awesome. -----signature----- You'll Like me when I'm Dead - V/P Dark Drama - http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/29236355 Don't think, write. And have faith that your subconscious mind is smarter than you.- lazy RIP my babies; Nibbler, Boo & Mister Magoo
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Lady_Skywalker87 Registered: Aug '08	Date Posted: 1/17 9:18pm Subject: RE: Proposition ~ A Padmé & Max vignette; precursor to "You'll Like Me When I'm Dead"
	Jade_Max posted: I know I said this before, but it bears saying again. I -love- how you have Max characterized - and Padmé's desperation and anguish are just so real. this is a fabulous "prequel" to "You'll Like Me When I'm Dead"! Awesome job, my friend... just awesome. I have to agree a 100% with this...the writting is superb!!!WELL DONE!!! -----signature----- 5/19/09:10 Years of the Beginngi!4 Years of the End! Attachment:a feeling that binds one to a person, thing, cause, ideal, or the like; devotion; regard.Attachment itself is not the problem.The prob is attaching yourself like Ani did!
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Daenarrah Registered: Nov '05	Date Posted: 2/21 10:40pm Subject: RE: Proposition ~ A Padmé & Max vignette; precursor to "You'll Like Me When I'm Dead" - Date Edited: 2/21 10:42pm (1 edits total) Edited By: Daenarrah
	I’m late in replying to these. Real Life had been hectic. Jade_Max: Well, I can’t thank you enough for creating such an awesome OC. Max is such a great character and he’s so much fun to write about. I have to thank you for letting me play with him here. I look forward to writing more with him, and hope you like the vigs that are still to come. Lady_Skywalker87: Thank you. I’m glad you enjoyed this. I can’t say it enough, Jade created a wonderful OC who’s fun to write about. As noted on the thread title, there’s been a name change. And this will now be a collection of vignettes leading up to You’ll Like Me When I’m Dead. I’ll be posting these as time and inspiration allows. Like with YLMWID, if anybody wants to be on the PM list for this let me know. Summary: Redemption or revenge. They’re the same thing to Padmé. And none of the people putting her on its path will be able to tell her differently. Characters: Padmé, Max, Vader, Bail, and others ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Title: A Bitter Pill to Swallow Author: Daenarrah Characters: Padmé, Bail Genre: Drama Era: Post RotS AU Summary: It’s a bitter pill to swallow knowing the people she called friends and colleagues could betray her so easily. Notes: This is second in the series of vigs that lead up to You'll Like Me When I'm Dead ~~~~~~~~ “Bail, please. I deserve to know,” Padmé said firmly, looking at him from across the large table in one of the conferences room of the hidden base. “They’re my children!” She knew by now it had become pointless to ask what had happened to Luke and Leia. Every time she’d done so she’d gotten the same answer – cryptic words telling her they were all right and well cared for and that was all she needed to know. And every time she’d told Bail, as well as Mon, that wasn’t all she needed to know. She needed to know where they were so she could see them and hold them and be a mother to them. And every time she’d been denied, given the same, long, drawn out explanation she had heard so many times she was now hearing it in her sleep. She knew this time would be no different. She knew exactly what Bail was going to say, but she had to keep trying. These were her children, her precious babies. She couldn’t give up on them and the hope that Bail, or Mon, would eventually tell her where they had been spirited away to. Looking at Bail expectantly; if she kept asking and being persistent maybe she could convince him she deserved to know. Maybe. “I know they are, Padmé, but” Bail let out an exhausted sigh. Dealing with her and this issue had become his least favorite thing to do. It always drained him and left a sick feeling in his stomach knowing he was willfully betraying a friend; keeping a mother and her children apart. But he knew this decision was for the best, considering the circumstances that led up to it…and the catastrophic results that followed, “it’s best you not know. For your safety and your children. Why can’t you see that?” And like every time before, Bail gave Padmé the answer she inevitably knew she’d get. However, it didn’t deter her from her goal. Letting out a sigh of her own, one filled with frustration, she looked Bail squarely in the eye. “And why can’t you understand? These are my children. Mine! I have every right to know what you’ve done with them, to know where they are.” Padmé could feel herself begin to tremble as anger welled up tightly in her chest. It was hard for her to look at the man she considered one of her closest friends and allies. She never thought, in her entire lifetime, that he would betray her like this. Looking at her intently, Bail felt true sympathy for the woman standing before him. He couldn’t dare show it. He kept his stoic façade in place and said in a calm voice – one he knew from previous conversations would only further increase Padmé’s mounting anger, “Luke and Leia are safe and well loved. That’s all you need to know.” “No, it’s not!” Padmé cried, slamming her fists onto the table. Anger spilled over and twisted into an acute pain, ripping her heart into pieces. Her eyes welled up with tears as her body trembled worse than before. “Damn you, Bail, don’t do this to me.” Her voice wavered and her vision became blurry as she blinked back the tears. “Padmé, I know this is hard for you-” Bail began only to be viciously cut off. “No you don’t! You have no idea what it’s like! You’ve never woken up after being in a coma for six months, desperate to see your children – children you barely remember giving birth to, children you weren’t able to see and hold and spend time with - only to find out two months later they’re not even on the base. And they haven’t been since right after they were born!” Bail watched Padmé straighten and turn away. Her fists clenched at her sides and her heavy breathing through her nose told him she was trying to regain her composure. It was painful to see his friend and colleague in such a state. She had always carried herself with such poise and decorum, never losing her focus even in the face of extreme adversity. He saw less and less of that every time they talked. Her temper; her anger with him – and Mon – was getting the better of her, becoming more prevalent, and this concerned him. Unfortunately, he couldn’t let his worry for her welfare distract him. He had to make her understand – somehow – that the decision made regarding her children was for the best. “Padmé, we did what we thought was right,” he said sternly, his thoughts briefly going to the two innocent children born into the nightmare the galaxy had become. They then turned to the matter of the twin’s paternity and he felt his blood run cold. “And given the circumstances, your children were not safe here. I’m surprised you’ve been all this time.” “How could I not be? The galaxy thinks I’m dead!” Padmé reminded him sharply, turning back to hold the Alderaanian senator’s gaze. “Another decision you took upon yourself to make for me. My children would have been safe with me.” “You don’t know that. If anything you would have been putting them at more risk had you all been together.” “And you don’t know that,” she echoed back. “Master Yoda did,” Bail said pointedly. Padmé looked away, her eyes shut tight to keep the tears from falling. She remembered being told how the diminutive Jedi Master suggested Luke and Leia be separated from her. He believed the combined presence of all three would be like a beacon in the Force for both their father and his new Master and they would not be safe no matter where they went. If Vader were to ever find out she was alive he’d track her down and claim her, by force no doubt, and claim her children in the name of the Empire and Sith. She’d be powerless to stop him; she wouldn’t be able to stop him from taking Luke and Leia away from her; she wouldn’t be able to stop him from corrupting them. She didn’t want to believe that. She wanted to believe she could protect her children against anything – including him if need be. “But he hasn’t looked for me,” she cried, desperate to find some kind of high ground, no matter how small. “He doesn’t even know I’m alive.” Bail didn’t need to hear names to know exactly who she was talking about: the man she once secretly loved and called her husband, the man who was now the scourge of the galaxy. Several times over he had reiterated what Yoda had said, but he found each time Padmé didn’t care. She was willing to take that chance of being found if it meant being able to raise her babies. Bail could feel his patience fraying and the last thing he wanted to do was snap at her. But she was being unreasonable. Leaning forward, he placed his hands on the table holding her attention this time. “Do you want to change that option or have him continue to believe you’re dead?” “Like the rest of the galaxy?” Padmé snapped herself, leaning forward on the table now, and glaring harshly at Bail. With another sigh he stood up, shaking his head but keeping his eyes on Padmé’s. “You know why we did that,” he said wearily. “It was for your own safety and your children. If Vader knew you were alive he’d be looking for you and Luke and Leia. Is that what you want?” Hearing Vader’s name come from Bail’s lips sent a stabbing pain through her heart. She was still having a hard time resigning herself to the fact that Anakin, the man she knew and loved so deeply, was gone, truly gone. In his place now stood Darth Vader, second in command of the Galactic Empire, murderer of Jedi and Younglings, and the reason her children had been taken away from her. The reason she had been betrayed by people she once thought of as friends who took it upon themselves to decide the fate of her and her children. Whatever composure she had regained crumbled away leaving her feeling vulnerable and helpless. Slumping her shoulders, she leaned back and poured herself into the nearest chair. Her elbows rested on the table while she cradled her head in her hands. “No, no,” she said weakly. “I never wanted any of this.” “None of us did,” Bail said watching her try not to fall apart. “But the situation is out of our hands. It always was. And now we must deal with the consequences.” The rigidness in Bail’s voice caught Padmé’s attention. She glanced up at him. “Do you understand why I can’t tell you were your children are?” he asked. “No. No, I don’t.” Padmé paused and took a shuttering breath while she tried to compose herself one more time. “I’m fully aware of what …Anakin- …Vader has done-” She was trembling again. It was so hard for her to call her husband by the name he went by now. But that’s who he was. Anakin was effectively dead. And, she understood what Bail was implying when he talked about consequences. He didn’t need to go into detail. It was a subtle reminder of her part in things. “-but don’t punish me for it. Don’t keep me away from my children.” “You’re the reason the galaxy is in this mess. Your own words; he did all this for you, to keep you from dying.” It was a low blow; yes, but Bail felt he had no other choice but to use it. Padmé wasn’t listening to reason. The words stung Padmé sharp and clear and sent her mind reeling. These were words coming from a friend, a trusted colleague?! But the pain they provoked was far greater and it rocketed so hard and fast through her that she couldn’t keep it inside. Her voice wavered and cracked uncontrollably. “I know! Don’t remind me! I hate it! I hate knowing it’s all because of me. I hate knowing what Anakin has become. But that’s no reason to keep my babies from me. I’m their mother! I deserve to be with them- I need to be.” Her pleading turned desperate and Padmé didn’t care if she was begging. “Please Bail, I just want to hold them, raise them, tell them how much I love them. I want to know what they look like because I can’t remember!” The desolation and anguish in Padmé’s eyes was almost unbearable to see. He couldn’t stand seeing her in so much pain, and, for a brief moment, Bail felt his resolve slip. He remembered she had offered to go into hiding with Luke and Leia, to let the galaxy – and Vader – continue to believe she was dead. She said she was willing to live on some obscure planet in the Outer Rim or Wild Space or the Unknown Regions, just so she could be with and raise her children. It seemed like a reasonable offer. Would it really be that bad to allow Padmé- Swiftly, and with a sharp reprimand, Bail reminded himself that if he gave her what she wanted he’d be putting the galaxy, and its future, at great risk. He didn’t want to see what the outcome would be should Vader ever find out and get his hands on his children, get his hands on Padmé. “Padmé, please,” he insisted. “You’re only making this harder on yourself.” “Me?” Padmé railed, shooting up from the chair and slamming her fists onto the table once more. Anger was front and center and it roiled through her like fire. Her eyes blazed with it while she glared at Bail. “I’m not doing this. You’re the ones who took my children- stole them away from me when I was in no position to defend myself or them. You just decided what you thought was best for them with no regard or concern for what I might think. You didn’t give me a chance to say what I wanted. You couldn’t even wait for me to come out of my coma! You just took them away from me and expected me to be okay with it when I found out.” “You were in a coma for six months!” Bail bellowed back. Gods, why was she being so unreasonable?! “We couldn’t wait for you to come out of it; we didn’t know if you ever would. And the longer Luke and Leia remained here the more they were in danger. Master Yoda could feel they were already strong in the Force. Keeping them here while waiting for you to recover could have drawn Vader in completely. We did what we thought was best. If you can’t accept that-” Padmé cut him off, tired of hearing the same old argument. “What I can’t accept, and never will, is people I thought were my friends and allies betraying me like this. You have no right doing this to me. I’ve done nothing to deserve this.” “Nothing?” Bail questioned incredulously. Padmé knew exactly what she had done, how her actions affected the galaxy. And it looked like he was going to have to give her a complete reminder of that, no matter how painful it would be for her. “You’re the one who married Anakin Skywalker; kept it a secret all these years for fear he’d be expelled from the Jedi Order, only to have him turn around and slaughter them. Plunging the galaxy into darkness because he was too afraid of losing you, too afraid you would die in childbirth. As far as he knows you died anyways, carrying his child with you. And I’ve watched one of the Republic’s greatest heroes become a monster.” Padmé suddenly felt defeated. Having her indiscretions thrown in her face always hurt too much and the results of her actions was always more than she could take. Still, these were her children. “That still doesn’t give you the right to take my babies from me,” she said weakly. “Padmé, please, stop asking. I’m not telling you, neither is Mon. All you need to know is your children are safe and out of Vader’s way.” And there it was. The resolute tone that told Padmé the conversation was over. There would be no news forthcoming about the whereabouts of her children. There never was. Once again Padmé failed to find out where her children were. And once again, Padmé felt her anger and resentment towards Bail and Mon grow deeper. “And my children are away from me,” Padmé said, the soft tone of her voice belying the animosity she felt. “That’s something I never agreed to.” “Padmé-” “I’ll never forgive you for this!” Before Bail got the chance to say another word, Padmé forcefully pushed away the chair she had once been sitting in, sending it slamming into the wall, and stormed towards the conference room door. With each step she struggled to contain her anger when all she really wanted to do was leap across the table, put him in one of the holds Panaka had taught her and keep him in it until he told her where Luke and Leia were. Never before has she had an urge so badly. It wasn’t appropriate behavior for a Senator. But then she wasn’t one anymore. In fact, she wasn’t even alive anymore. That allowed her to fully justify everything she felt, said and did. It was an almost liberating feeling, but it had come at such a heavy price. Refusing to look back, and blinking back the tears that wanted to fall, Padmé hurried out of the room. So caught up in the anguish and pain that bled through her chest, making her die a little bit more inside, she didn’t see the tall male about to come in. She walked with such a determination and need to get away from Bail that she collided with him before she realized he was there. And the impact was so strong she almost knocked him down. Surprised and stumbling a bit, she looked up to see him stumble as well and then catch himself. All she could do was stare at him. An apology was on the tip of her tongue, and he certainly deserved one. The look on his face told her that as well. But she found she couldn’t say anything. She was pretty certain the man was going to say something, though. He looked annoyed enough. And she knew she wouldn’t have the strength to defend herself. Padmé was surprised when his face softened and he apologized to her for being in her way. Nonplussed a moment, she finally found her voice and told him it was okay. She then walked away. She wasn’t but a few steps, however, when she turned around and asked, “Are you going to talk to Senator Organa?” Caught off guard by the sudden question, the man turned to face her. Something about the look on her face compelled him to answer. “Yes, I am. There’s something I really need to talk to him about. Something I hope he’ll agree to let me do.” “Don’t bother,” she said bitterly. “You won’t get what you want, no matter how many times you ask for it and know you deserve it.” She held the man’s eyes a split second then turned around and walked away. She wasn’t going to give him the opportunity to ask her what she meant; she only intended to give him something to think about, something to consider when he approached Bail. Who knows, maybe he’d be more fortunate than she was. The very idea stabbed at her heart, intensifying the constant, steady pain she felt from missing Luke and Leia. Along with that pain, anger grew, strong and steady as well. It nourished her; it helped keep her going on her worst days. It reminded her of what Bail and Mon had done to her. Without a doubt, she had to get her children back. No matter what it took, she had to find them. And she swore she would, if it was the last thing she did. -----signature----- You'll Like Me When I'm Dead ~ V/P Dark Drama/Dark Romance - http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/29236355 Hellbound to Redemption - http://boards.theforce.net/the_saga/b10476/29688961/r29808732/
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Lady_Skywalker87 Registered: Aug '08	Date Posted: 2/25 2:37pm Subject: Hellbound to Redemption (title change) vignettes leading up to "You'll Like Me When I'm Dead"
	Poor Padmè Another Wonderful viggie Danerrah!!! -----signature----- 5/19/09:10 Years of the Beginngi!4 Years of the End! Attachment:a feeling that binds one to a person, thing, cause, ideal, or the like; devotion; regard.Attachment itself is not the problem.The prob is attaching yourself like Ani did!
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